told him that the only key to happiness
the ‘kathy hold the key to life is
happiness when John went to school they
gave him an assignment along with the
whole class and the assignment was all
about what do you want to become when
you grow old and John wrote happy the
teachers called him and then they asked
him John you did not understand the
assignment and John Lennon replied you
know what you don’t understand life in
our life today in this tangible world we
all are eventually wanting to be happy
and joyous but the road to this
happiness is not direct though so
everybody wants respect in society they
want sufficient amount of money now
sufficiency with money is a very
subjective term nobody knows how much is
too much they all want to be famous in
their own state by doing whatever
they’re doing everybody wants to be
satisfied they want to be secure and
only when they have achieved all these
things they want to be happy and joyous
the past three decades of economic
development in India has done a lot to
India then what we know about it and the
best of the impact is that it has given
birth to this great Indian middle class
this great individual class has learned
to dream that’s another beautiful thing
that has happened and the three
components of this great Indian will
class the dream of course I’m talking
about the three components are number
one they all have wanted to build their
own home or house in an urban area
they’re still wanting to the second is
they all wanting to have a very great
and third in the last they’re wanting
very great quality education for their
children and this great integral class
is going all the way they’re doing
everything possible working day and
night to make all or some of these
components of their dream come true now
they’re seriously nothing wrong with the
first in the second part in relative
sense of course but when it comes to the
to the second one sorry third one
educating the child there is a serious
flaw I have come across a lot of quotes
in my life I really have been reading
these quotes from here and there from
different perspectives and societies
hello Joey and two of these greatest
scores that I’ve come across are
subscribed to to children
the first quote is every child comes or
takes birth with a message that God is
still not fed above human beings but
decide has not comes to this world all
alone is brought into this world so the
second code becomes much more
interesting and that reads that the
decision of having a children a child
the decision of having a child is like
letting the heart walk out of your body
forever now this is a very very serious
code I don’t know how and what we
understand about this but I would want
all of you as lot of people have been
doing to close your eyes this last time
and not only to listen to me but to feel
through my words that I am going to say
and please do it you have worked very
hard as a part belonging to that great
Indian middle class you have got
yourself educated you’ve got across a
lot of barriers faced the challenges and
you have made a great life out of it
you’ve made a good home and you have an
amazing kid boy or girl repents you’re
wanting everything your is investing
you’re doing everything for your child
to do great in life
you want him to face the toughest of
competitions to qualify to get educated
in one of the best places possible the
biggest of the and the greatest of the
institution you have ever known the
world has known for that matter and you
also want that he should be getting a
good job in one of the fortune 500
companies with a very very fat package
to satisfy all his material needs
whatsoever of today and of course as it
goes in Indian society you also want him
to get married in time and also want him
to have kids good kids you want all
these things to happen with your kid and
there is nothing wrong with that and
then suddenly this happens
this is a classic video just open your eyes and look at this this was short a
eyes and look at this this was short a story that really shook me as a
story that really shook me as a counselor as a mentor and this was a
counselor as a mentor and this was a video that this child is making just
video that this child is making just before he committed suicide I would have
before he committed suicide I would have really wanted to listen to that but then
really wanted to listen to that but then was it been very buddy gruesome also at
was it been very buddy gruesome also at the same time in this video is talking
the same time in this video is talking about how his how his grandparents
about how his how his grandparents always used to say that he could not do
always used to say that he could not do anything how he has ditched everybody
anything how he has ditched everybody when they wanted him to do so well in
when they wanted him to do so well in life and how he could not do anything in
life and how he could not do anything in life how he has given up and how it has
life how he has given up and how it has been so much so very so very tormenting
been so much so very so very tormenting for him for him to live this life and to
for him for him to live this life and to go to to undergo the kind of trauma that
go to to undergo the kind of trauma that he is undergoing right now and and and
he is undergoing right now and and and he’s so much he remembers his mother he
he’s so much he remembers his mother he said that the only person attaching me
said that the only person attaching me still with this life is you but still
still with this life is you but still what I’m undergoing right now is much
what I’m undergoing right now is much much more than that attachment and let
much more than that attachment and let me just end it all up he also gives a
me just end it all up he also gives a message to his father they do you know
message to his father they do you know what you have one more son you take care
what you have one more son you take care of him very well he doesn’t goes on to
of him very well he doesn’t goes on to say how to take care of a child very
say how to take care of a child very well but he has a question and he says
well but he has a question and he says that then you take care of him very well
that then you take care of him very well he also gives a message to his younger
he also gives a message to his younger brother that hey I am doing this do not
brother that hey I am doing this do not even think of anything which is closer
even think of anything which is closer to this committing suicide I’m not going
to this committing suicide I’m not going to show you the the the suicidal point
to show you the the the suicidal point but then like I’m just leaving you with
but then like I’m just leaving you with this video to to make a context which is
this video to to make a context which is going to be very very clear they said
going to be very very clear they said that there is nothing as heavy people
that there is nothing as heavy people say that there’s nothing as heavy as the
say that there’s nothing as heavy as the as the coffin of your own son or a
as the coffin of your own son or a daughter or in own shoulders there’s the
daughter or in own shoulders there’s the heaviest thing in life for any human to
heaviest thing in life for any human to have and after this you suddenly want
have and after this you suddenly want him to be back you are ready to give up
him to be back you are ready to give up everything you are make making all
everything you are make making all amendments you are ready to change
amendments you are ready to change yourself absolutely and want him back
yourself absolutely and want him back but he’s gone you want to be with him
but he’s gone you want to be with him him to be living you cannot do anything
him to be living you cannot do anything now but you did not do anything when it
now but you did not do anything when it was required the most
was required the most you could not see him sleeping in fetal
you could not see him sleeping in fetal positions for days you could not see him
positions for days you could not see him losing his charm for a period of time
losing his charm for a period of time you did not he used to be a bundle of
you did not he used to be a bundle of joy and you did did not recognize when
joy and you did did not recognize when there was a behavioral change in him you
there was a behavioral change in him you kept on telling motivational stories on
kept on telling motivational stories on his face you kept on telling him as to
his face you kept on telling him as to how somebody has gone on to do this
how somebody has gone on to do this crack this competition whatever and so
crack this competition whatever and so he can also do it your child did not die
he can also do it your child did not die all of a sudden had this video been
all of a sudden had this video been played
played you could have listened to that your
you could have listened to that your child definitely did not die all of a
child definitely did not die all of a sudden he was dying since last many days
sudden he was dying since last many days or probably many years but you could not
or probably many years but you could not recognize and why he died because then
recognize and why he died because then he was dying because he was trying to
he was dying because he was trying to live up to the expectation which was way
live up to the expectation which was way beyond his capacity and belief capacity
beyond his capacity and belief capacity and potential and belief it is you who
and potential and belief it is you who believed him to be doing something and
believed him to be doing something and never he did so the quest always has
never he did so the quest always has been become you know between this
been become you know between this becoming and being the parents focus on
becoming and being the parents focus on what their child could become based on
what their child could become based on an assumed future not on what they could
an assumed future not on what they could be based on their Flair and interests of
be based on their Flair and interests of today instead of providing theirs their
today instead of providing theirs their kids wings and giving them courage to
kids wings and giving them courage to fly the parents treat their kids like
fly the parents treat their kids like kites with a string attached in their
kites with a string attached in their hands and they go on increasing the
hands and they go on increasing the distance of the kite with them but still
distance of the kite with them but still still their string is in their hands
still their string is in their hands they never realize that whether his kite
they never realize that whether his kite or their kite which they are holding is
or their kite which they are holding is able to take that kind of a pressure and
able to take that kind of a pressure and tension which they are exerting every
tension which they are exerting every time there they are releasing this
time there they are releasing this particular string from their hands and
particular string from their hands and the distance is increasing and
the distance is increasing and eventually one day it breaks and the guy
eventually one day it breaks and the guy goes forever
goes forever this is a very interesting picture if
this is a very interesting picture if you can look at a classic Indian
you can look at a classic Indian classroom model where the teacher is
classroom model where the teacher is asking symbolically this is a very
asking symbolically this is a very symbolic poster some of you have seen it
symbolic poster some of you have seen it also this crow monkey penguin elephant
also this crow monkey penguin elephant fish a seal Anna Anna and a dog and the
fish a seal Anna Anna and a dog and the teacher is saying for a fair selection
teacher is saying for a fair selection you all have to take up this test of
you all have to take up this test of climbing on the street Albert Einstein
climbing on the street Albert Einstein once said everybody is a genius but if
once said everybody is a genius but if you judge a fish by its ability to climb
you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree it will make him it will make him
a tree it will make him it will make him whole life believe that he is a stupid
whole life believe that he is a stupid how can you in this world possibly ask a
how can you in this world possibly ask a fish to climb on a tree but definitely
fish to climb on a tree but definitely children mature at a different age their
children mature at a different age their biological age is symbolic though so if
biological age is symbolic though so if we have all 10 year olds all 20 year
we have all 10 year olds all 20 year olds in front of me it is very very easy
olds in front of me it is very very easy for me without analyzing them to assume
for me without analyzing them to assume that they all hold equal competencies
that they all hold equal competencies but actually what lies within them is a
but actually what lies within them is a different maturity level which is
different maturity level which is symbolic to this particular picture that
symbolic to this particular picture that is their smartness is directly related
is their smartness is directly related to grades is another very very bad thing
to grades is another very very bad thing that has happened to them to the to the
that has happened to them to the to the nation right now competencies such as
nation right now competencies such as creativity and problem-solving qualities
creativity and problem-solving qualities are either sidelined or even they are
are either sidelined or even they are graded not enhanced or encouraged
graded not enhanced or encouraged another one is a very very interesting
another one is a very very interesting poster again if you can look at this
poster again if you can look at this these are all sheep trying to come out
these are all sheep trying to come out of the rear of the of the barn now what
of the rear of the of the barn now what is happening here is that there is only
is happening here is that there is only one gate and they’re all following each
one gate and they’re all following each other interesting thing is there is
other interesting thing is there is absolutely no boundary so they’re all
absolutely no boundary so they’re all trying to zip in through the gate only
trying to zip in through the gate only thereby creating a lot of confusion and
thereby creating a lot of confusion and chaos at the gate and that leads to a
chaos at the gate and that leads to a competition also those from right and
competition also those from right and left could have easily walked over and
left could have easily walked over and made their own path it could have been a
made their own path it could have been a displacement reduce the distance and
displacement reduce the distance and also they could have faster travel but
also they could have faster travel but no out of my all these years of
no out of my all these years of counseling experience and thousands of
counseling experience and thousands of students a girl walks into me and she
students a girl walks into me and she says that she’s not having any friends
says that she’s not having any friends why because of a simple reason there’ll
why because of a simple reason there’ll be a distraction to her
be a distraction to her in there come in our competition another
in there come in our competition another child tells me that he has not watched
child tells me that he has not watched movie since last two years although he
movie since last two years although he so much wants to watch it how many times
so much wants to watch it how many times children have come and come up to me in
children have come and come up to me in fact and say that you know what how many
fact and say that you know what how many times I have tried to search on internet
times I have tried to search on internet of the safest and the and the easiest
of the safest and the and the easiest method to die and this is all happening
method to die and this is all happening all all under our nose a degree maybe a
all all under our nose a degree maybe a passport to a job why because this is
passport to a job why because this is what picking and not seeing it happening
what picking and not seeing it happening and agree maybe a passport to a job but
and agree maybe a passport to a job but may not be a passport to success and
may not be a passport to success and definitely it is never a passport to
definitely it is never a passport to happiness the whole idea of Education
happiness the whole idea of Education does is status and and money the old
does is status and and money the old scriptures in India also says that when
scriptures in India also says that when they are the dot ammonium Vania day a
they are the dot ammonium Vania day a teapot rhythm patrut wattle mop Northey
teapot rhythm patrut wattle mop Northey Vinod thermometer so come it says the
Vinod thermometer so come it says the context is education leads to happiness
context is education leads to happiness but it does not automatically makes you
but it does not automatically makes you happy it undergoes a process we are a
happy it undergoes a process we are a part of this universe and it’s the way
part of this universe and it’s the way we connect with the universe defines our
we connect with the universe defines our happiness and definitely this happens
happiness and definitely this happens with what profession we choose after all
with what profession we choose after all that we have learned through the
that we have learned through the education that we have got the whole
education that we have got the whole context of learning has to be understood
context of learning has to be understood for this the whole context of learning
for this the whole context of learning is layers of learning the first layer of
is layers of learning the first layer of this learning is of course education it
this learning is of course education it comes through that institution of
comes through that institution of learning which a person cannot create or
learning which a person cannot create or recreate for himself it includes all the
recreate for himself it includes all the teachers books professor school colleges
teachers books professor school colleges everything the second layer is the
everything the second layer is the exposure that the people should
exposure that the people should definitely get because they learn in one
definitely get because they learn in one ecosystem and when they transact what
ecosystem and when they transact what they whatever they have learned from one
they whatever they have learned from one ecosystem in diverse ecosystems then
ecosystem in diverse ecosystems then their net learning increases why because
their net learning increases why because the point of views is a absolute new
the point of views is a absolute new discovery that they undergo and the
discovery that they undergo and the third and the last layer of learning is
third and the last layer of learning is experience when they applicate whatever
experience when they applicate whatever they have learned now what happens here
they have learned now what happens here is it never turns into experiential
is it never turns into experiential learning because most of the time what
learning because most of the time what people learn never inspires them well we
people learn never inspires them well we have two fairly understand I started the
have two fairly understand I started the talk with John Lennon every child is an
talk with John Lennon every child is an artist unless he is told he is not an
artist unless he is told he is not an artist so
artist so try to bridge the gap for them to
try to bridge the gap for them to experience this happiness let us be the
experience this happiness let us be the catalytic advantage for them and and
catalytic advantage for them and and help our child find who is and to do to
help our child find who is and to do to let him be trust me he’ll one day become
let him be trust me he’ll one day become whatever he is trying to become and he
whatever he is trying to become and he will become that thank you
will become that thank you [Applause]