today’s whole program is based on the
power of focus we if you recall in our
last session we’re talking about how to
really direct our states of mind and
emotion we said that everything that we
really want in our lives no matter what
it is whether it be family or friends or
relationship or money or business
success or acknowledging all those
things the only reason we want them is
what we think we’ll get out of them
which is a state change a certain level
of feeling within ourselves we also
found out our last tape that all
emotions every feeling we have is the
result of how we use our body that
emotions literally are nothing but
physiological storms and our brains if
you will and that we learned that by
using our bodies in certain ways by
using our voice our gestures our
breathing our facial expressions we
could radically change our states and we
also talked about the idea if you’re a
call of measuring our states where are
we on a scale from zero to ten ten being
absolutely empowered unstoppable
passionate zero being dead and noticing
are we at the appropriate level for what
we want to accomplish that for most
cases not all in mine but most wouldn’t
be nice deliver at level 8 9 or 10 or
above on a consistent basis how much
more juice would you have and so you
develop some exercises and discovering
how to move your body not like me not
like somebody else but like you do when
you really are feeling absolutely
excellent today what we want to do is
take on the second way we can manage our
states and the second way to change your
state at any moment in time as quickly
as you can think it is to control and
direct the focus of your mind what do I
mean by that well think about this the
only experience that you have of life
comes in two forms what you’re
physically feeling because of the
condition and use of your body at that
moment in other words if you’ve got
physical pain that’s obviously going to
affect your state there’s some kind of
tension for example or if you haven’t
had any sleep that’s certainly an effect
your state as well or if you’ve eaten
something that’s blown your blood sugar
sky-high then obviously that’s going to
affect your emotional states as well the
only other thing that really controls
your state is what are you paying
attention to right now at this moment
I mean let’s take an example have you
ever had a headache then even a massive
headache that you thought there’s no way
you would ever go away you’re really
deep pain now what do you do well most
people go get an aspirin what if instead
have you ever had it happen where
somebody asked you a question or
something needed to be done or something
acquired your total focus somewhere else
outside of yourself and a lamo
immediately the pain disappeared in fact
you forgot about it and later on when
you thought about it you notice your
headache was gone having had that happen
at least once or twice in your life now
how did you do that see my whole life
has been studying what makes people
successful if someone’s able to do
something if they’re able to get rapport
with somebody else if they’re able to
create the results they want physically
in their life added lose weight feel
energized if they’re able to create the
relationships that they really desire if
they’re able to feel as good as they
ever wanted to feel I want to know how
do they do that and so I began to study
how could somebody get rid of a deck
that quickly so we wouldn’t be dependent
on some drug like aspirin or Tylenol or
anything else and I began to realize
that what it was is we changed our
mental focus and that whatever
experiencing in our body really comes
from what we’re paying attention to
that’s what really determines how you
feel
and of course how you feel determines
usually how you’re going to behave does
that make sense when you’re feeling
really lousy you don’t usually do really
well I know they’re exceptions but those
exceptions are because you control your
focus you don’t focus on feeling lousy
you focus on what’s got to be done there
was tremendous power and controlling the
focus of your mind now what do I mean by
this specifically well there are two
things we can control in terms of focus
we can control what we’re focusing on
that is what we’re picturing in our mind
what we’re saying to ourselves what
we’re paying attention to in our
physical body or we can control how
we’re focusing how we’re focusing means
let’s say the dimension of the pictures
in our mind the brightness of the colors
in our head the volume of our sounds if
we change how we’re paying attention to
things not just what it radically
changes our state as well let me give an
example pretend for a moment that your
brain is a camera and you go to a party
how are you going to feel at that party
well the only thing you’re going to have
feelings about other things you focus on
I mean in that room literally
there are almost unlimited number of
activities and probably emotions and
conversations and things that are going
on but your experience of that party is
based on what that camera focuses on now
if it focuses on two people that are
fighting and that’s what it focuses on
for the entire party you would leave
that party saying oh that party was
really intense I mean people are really
upset with each other if your focus was
on two people in love or maybe guessing
passionately and say wow that party was
really moving I mean those people are
really connected if your focus was on
some people that were really boring or
bored it’s out nobody really enjoyed
that party
here’s the problem the problem is your
camera that is the focus that you have
does not usually take in everything
simultaneously your conscious mind can’t
there are only so many things you can
consciously focus on I mean think about
how many things right now you are not
paying attention to that are happening
at this moment there’s the blood
pulsating through your right ear you may
not even pay attention to it I mention
it now you might focus on there’s the
beat of your heart or you even noticing
that until I mentioned it
there’s the feel of maybe some air
coming from an air conditioning maybe if
you’re nearby or there’s the heat on
your skin or there’s the blinking of
your honor there are unlimited number of
things that are happening right now but
see here’s the thing about human beings
since we can’t focus on everything and
consciously perceive at all what most of
us do is we become what I call deletion
creatures what do I mean I mean that
most of the time most of us delete that
is we fail to pay attention to or we
ignore most of what’s going on around us
at any moment in time so what’s the
price of all this deletion well the
price is we walk around believing or
hallucinating might be a better word
that our experience of the world is real
now would you think that if you were
looking through a camera that was
focused on one little portion of the
party that that was truly the party that
wouldn’t be very intelligent with it in
fact you know what else is a problem
that camera may even create close-ups
where it makes things bigger than they
actually are what they look bigger and
brighter or worse than they were is that
possible – do you think your brain does
that as well you better believe it does
so the key is if you want your life
be a party that you’re happy with and
not a party that you’re upset with you
got to realize at any moment in time
there’s enough going on in the party of
your life that you could find something
to be upset about all you’ve got to do
is focus on all you got to do is now
look around that party find out areas
that don’t match your expectations make
them big and bright and close and you’ll
be upset and you know what most people
are good at this they’ve done it over
and over and over again
the other thing that’s equally true is
that virtually any party at any moment
in time there’s somebody having a good
time and if you were to focus on some
area of your life at that moment of time
you can make yourself feel absolutely
great or you could take some little
thing something that’s just kind of nice
but make it bigger and brighter and
immediately you can feel better about it
as well so here’s my point my point is
if you want to look at the quality of
life and know what it is it’s the
quality of the states that you live in
day to day I mean it’s not really true
isn’t it how you feel day to day the
determines how you treat yourself how
you treat other people and how great you
feel or how poor you feel about your
life what determines it one how you use
your body so you want to develop some
new habits and to what and how you focus
on things now that’s the only way we can
explain how people have come from
unbelievably painful experiences and
turn them around w Mitchell secret is he
has controlled his physical body
specifically the way he uses his face
this man has learned with what’s left of
his body to smile and move his face in
ways that makes him feel incredible and
the second thing is he focuses
continuously on what he wants what he’s
got what he’s grateful for and as a
result he feels incredible now nobody
would blame him for looking around and
seeing he has no legs and he has no
fingers got the toes there instead and
he’s in a situation where he’s in
physical pain a lot of the time nobody
would blame him for feeling sorry for
himself but see he doesn’t focus on that
he loves life because he focuses on the
part of the party that’s the best part
for him don’t you deserve to give
yourself the same gift now take a look
at John Belushi example we used earlier
also how could a guy like Belushi or
Presley or take somebody like Elizabeth
Taylor here’s a lady that would have
everything going for by most people
standards she’s an incredibly
intelligent woman she’s absolutely
beautiful she’s a great actress she has
thousands and thousands probably
millions of fans to be more accurate who
absolutely love her she has as much
money as most people could ever imagine
needing or wanting she has a lifestyle
that’s absolutely phenomenal she has
family and friends that care about her
and do anything for her and yet what
happens with this lady she has not
learned to manage her state and she pays
the price as great as she is great on
the stage but in her personal life over
and over again she has to turn to food
or the drugs that try and take care of
the challenges within herself see how
could someone have it all and still be
unhappy because no matter how good it is
you can always focus on something that
isn’t perfect or doesn’t match your
expectations and that is called ultimate
failure in life you want to know what I
believe success is success is creating
consistent pleasure in your life and
causing yourself to grow failure is
being able to find pain no matter how
good it is
that’s failure the bottom line is you
have that power and you can change it
right now by understanding that you make
decisions about what to focus on now it
may be true that you’ve got some bad
habits it may be true that right now you
look at what’s worse or you look at
what’s wrong or you see what’s not
working your life and it’s habitual so
you don’t think about it consciously but
you still make the decisions you can
turn off the automatic pilot and take
control and when you do you can
instantly change the quality of your
life the lady I married my wife Becky
one things I love about her more than
anything in the world the reason I
married her probably more than anything
else is this woman is so incredible at
her ability at any moment in time to
focus on what is great in a situation
what is beautiful most little things she
and I share that power where we can be
in the middle of anything the middle of
turmoil and upsets and frustrations and
in a heartbeat we can stop and we say
hey look notice that flower notice that
sunset or look in each other’s eyes and
say how did I get so lucky to get you we
have that ability and we share we
reinforce it in each other and it gives
power to our relationship and to our
lives
you have
that control all you have to do is
exercise it so what I want to do is be
more specific with you now and how to do
it first of all let me demonstrate this
is really true to you I mean you may say
well yeah this makes sense well let’s
take a quick example now this may be an
unfair situation if you’re in a place
that you’re familiar with but let’s try
this right now and if you’re in a place
you’re familiar with you might want to
try it later on in the day when you’re
not familiar with something but let’s
take an example here what I want you to
do right now is I’d like you if you
would let’s test the power of something
I want you to look around your room the
room you’re in right now or if you’re in
your car you can look out the windows
also but I want you to notice everything
you can see everything you can see and
I’m going to give you a few seconds that
is brown quick look around the room
everything you can see that’s brown the
Kuran your car look outside everything
you see is round quickly everything make
sure you don’t miss anything everything
you see is brown quick quick quick okay
stop close your eyes with your eyes
closed now close your eyes and you’re
driving this is difficult okay so you
might want to try this later as an
exercise but I’d like you to do is close
your eyes and what I want you to do with
your eyes closed now is tell me or you
know since I’m not there literally
although I may be you never know but
just for now outloud say everything
that’s in this room that is green oh
maybe I hooked you a little bit huh
you’re waiting for Brown tell me out
loud come on everything that’s green try
everything in the room that is white and
everything the room that’s red and now
open your eyes and look around the room
and notice everything you can see in
this room that’s green come on take a
good look now some of you may say well
there’s nothing to trim this green look
behind you there there’s something green
behind you that’s right
what’s blue in this room now do you see
a lot more green do you see a lot more
blue now than you did the first time
unless you’re in a room you already are
super familiar with that is you’ve
already got a picture in your head and
you know it like maybe it’s your bedroom
you know everything even then you may
not have noticed everything but if
you’re in a strange room or in a place
you’re not used to what I find is 99% of
the time people see a lot more blue and
green when I asked them
about that specifically later on in
other words when I asked you to focus on
brown that’s what comes up
you notice mostly brown you tend to
delete a lot of the other details isn’t
that true now how does that relate to
life see a lot of people in life stare
at and focus on the brown in life the
shall we say species of life and other
people they look for the green they look
for it’s growing they look for it’s
alive that’s what you need to do see in
life we get whatever we focus on
whatever you pay attention to that’s
what you experience in your body
instantly so how do we control our focus
well that’s a good question for years
I’ve been looking at it you know I read
all the books on positive thinking where
they said hey you want to do good you’ve
got to feel good that makes sense and if
you want the feel good you’ve got the
duck yourself good and picture good well
the challenge with that a challenge with
positive thinking is what we’ve already
talked about Tomalin positive thinking
is you got to think about it it’s a
little bit difficult we got to get
ourselves conditioned to think more
positive plus I kept asking the question
how do you think positive is a B
positive
how well I said you know make good
pictures allow you get yourself to do
that and so what I’ve analyzed for years
is what determines since there are
zillions of things you and I could pay
attention to at any moment what
determines what we focus on well some of
what we focus on or most of it is based
upon our beliefs of what’s important and
our values and we’re going to talk about
that in the next tape but for right now
the thing that at this specific moment
determines what you focus on is how
you’re evaluating things now that sounds
like a big chunk but what do I mean by
that well the way we evaluate things
determines how we feel but what is an
evaluation evaluations are nothing but
questions the way I found this out is
one day I was realizing well you know W
Mitchell is pretty happy because he’s
evaluated his life and what it makes him
happy John Belushi’s not here because of
the way he evaluated things he made
himself actually feel bad and he had
plenty could have felt good on if he
just focused on that part of his life’s
party if you will so I thought how do I
explain what an evaluation is and then I
noticed that I had asked a question to
try to evaluate how to explain
evaluations and I thought what is it
possible what evaluations or questions
I thought the question – isn’t it that’s
the question isn’t God is that really
one evaluation is is a question
and I thought was a question pretty soon
I looked myself in a trending began to
realize evaluations are in fact
questions and I try to mismatch it that
is I try to look at the opposite side
and I tested on all kinds of people
maybe you can find the opposite of what
I’m saying but I don’t know I have found
that thinking is nothing but the process
of evaluating things you’re always
evaluating what does this mean to me and
what should I do
those are two questions your brain is
asking on a continuous basis see if I
take my fist and I go wham and I bring
it within two inches of your face I
guarantee you your brain is going to
make some evaluations question number
one what does this mean question Emma do
what should I do and your brain is going
to evaluate it’s going to search your
brain for your beliefs about what does
this mean do I need to move is it going
to hit me what does this mean and what
should I do do I hit back do I just what
what does my body need to do we’re
always asking those two primary
questions but the questions we ask
determine what we focus on here let me
be more specific and I’ll think you’ll
have an example of what I mean I’ve said
to you so far in this tape that what you
focus on determines how you feel I’ve
also said that the questions you ask
yourself determine what you focus on
think of questions this way imagine your
brain is the ultimate computer and in
that computer is the answer to any
question you could possibly have and by
the way I believe that that metaphor is
really how your brain works
it can come up with the answer to any
question you’re asking Bible says ask
and you shall receive a very true and
real statement beyond what you might
believe religiously even if you have
different religious beliefs it is
reality in my experience of how our
brain works now if you have this great
computer and in front of you the only
way you get information out of this
computer is to ask for it you tap in to
this keyboard and you ask questions and
bam and answer the questions you will
get responses on the screen your brain
works the same way you ask questions you
hit the keyboard with questions and it
will fire off the answers in your brain
but here’s what’s different about your
brain than most computers whatever
question you ask if you ask it with the
absolute expectation that you’re going
to get an answer and as you ask it
consistently and you give you a brain
time to search for the answers you will
get an answer
by the way any question you ask you’re
going to answer to even one that doesn’t
have a basis in reality in other words
this computer will do anything it’ll
search it files and make things up in
order to answer your question what do I
mean well if you go around and ask your
brain why do these things always happen
to me well guess what your brain will
search all its databases and say why do
the involves happen to me and it’ll take
every possible form of input of what
people said to you in your life what
you’ve ever said to yourself which
you’ve ever read or saw on TV and I’ll
make up an answer for you it always
happens to you because you’re Turkey
that’s why right and I’m sure enough now
you feel lousy you see gosh I’m a turkey
you feel bad and everything is not
working out see whatever you ask you to
get an answer to if you say how come I’m
so lucky you know how did I get so lucky
your brain will search all kinds of
things and show you that you’re lucky in
other words our questions determine how
we feel now if you’ve got certain
emotions certain feelings that you have
on a daily basis that you don’t like
habitual emotions I’m here to tell you
that the feelings you feel are come from
what you focus on so what you have is
habitual focuses and those focuses come
from habitual questions in other words
if you feel certain ways on an ongoing
basis it’s because you’re asking certain
questions on an ongoing basis might be
useful if we discover what those are
I’ll give you some samples questions
that people ask themselves on a regular
basis that make them feel lousy
question number one is why does this
always happen to me I want you to notice
in that question is something we call a
presupposition a presupposition means
you are presupposing in the question the
things already happen to you that may
not be true but as long as you ask
questions that way your brain will make
up an answer for you and I’ll give it a
good example after the 1988 Republican
National Convention when George Bush
selected Dan Quayle as his running mate
CNN ran a public opinion poll where you
called a 900 number and vote yes or no
to the answer to a question but here is
the question it blew my mind question
was does it bother you that Dan Quayle
used his family’s influence to stay out
of Vietnam and to get in the National
Guard
now I’m paraphrasing just slightly but
that’s what they say
now tell me what’s wrong with this
picture and challenges they presuppose
that he actually did it they said does
it bother you so your brain stops
evaluating whether he actually did it or
not and focuses on whether it bothers
you or not does this happen every day
with you do you ask questions that
presuppose that you’ve got a limited
level of intelligence or skill or
ability and therefore get lousy answers
in your brain listen if you ask yourself
questions like why am I so fat that
question guarantees you’re going to stay
fat you know why cuz think oh why myself
at your brand ago okay let me figure out
the reasons lamo here’s why you’re fat
coz you eat continuously and you have no
control your brain goes oh oh good I
only control and you feel the useless
and you feel like you’re disempowered
what would be a better question to ask
yourself then why am I so fat how about
this one how can I become more thin
right now or what could I do today to
start myself on the road to becoming
more thin and what do I need to do
consistently to create the long-term
results of health that I want if you ask
a better-quality question you will get a
better quality answer or I’ll give you a
step beyond that if you ask a question
like how can I become more thin now
you’ll get an answer but what if you ask
a question like how can I become more
thin now and enjoy the process ah
magical when you ask that question what
happens now is you literally come up
with only an answer of how to lose
weight but also how to enjoy it and
since your brain likes pleasure there’s
a much better chance you’re going to
follow through am I making any sense to
you I’m here to tell you that the
quality of your life comes down to the
quality of the questions you ask
yourself on a daily basis so if you’re
asking questions like well how come I
can’t ever learn anything just listening
to that question or why can’t I ever
learn anything that’s even worse why
questions tend to be what I call endless
loop questions like why did this happen
to me see your brain probably can never
come up with a definitive answer it’ll
come up with all kinds of reasons but
you’ll keep going into a loop now I
discovered the power of questions in my
own life because at one time my life I
was really really angry and
anyone to change my physiology and my
movement to make myself feel better but
I didn’t want to you ever been in that
state like somebody said to me well Tony
just change your physiology and I don’t
want to alright I was upset but the
reason I was upset is what I was
focusing on I was focusing on somebody
who had taken a bunch of money for my
company and embezzled it and I got
pretty upset to say the least and I was
walking around in a frenzy going how
could he do this
how could he have the audacity to do
this I may have even had an expletive
her to who knows but the point is that
by asking those questions I was whipping
myself into frenzy
how could he possibly do this why would
he do this situation to me well guess
what you’re never going to get an answer
to that all it does is whip you into
more and more of a frenzy can you hear
it so finally I said okay doing this is
leading the more and more pain isn’t
making my life any better I better ask
myself a more empowering question so I
thought what’s something that’s
important to me my answer is I love to
learn I already shared that with you so
I said okay what can I learn from this
well guess what
my brain likes learning so it was
willing to focus on that question and
you know what out of that question of
what can I learn from this over the next
three months
I literally developed a whole new level
of understanding about what makes human
beings do what they do I develop
literally a whole new technology which I
call destiny technologies and I now do a
whole seminar called your date with
destiny only help people literally
design their life so they are literally
pulled forward in the direction they
want their life to be rather than having
all the self-sabotage and challenges
that come up for people the most
incredible program I do it all came out
of me taking a horrible situation and
asking a better question what kind of
learn from this what can I get out of
this that would enhance my life and
other people’s as well how can I use
this situation to create much more power
in my ability to help people and help
myself asking these questions allowed me
to search my brains data banks and
create tremendous power out of that
situation after I was in that situation
I had other times when I get upset I’m
terribly when I get upset because I’ve
asked me a why question why did this
person do this I don’t understand or how
could they possibly have done it because
I would never do that how could they do
that I’ll never get the answer based on
that so I learned to ask the question
what can I
learn from this now for you that might
not be the right question many learning
is not important enough for you at brain
to go while I’m willing to focus on that
now instead of the problem but my brain
I pick learning or I pick something like
well if I’m angry at somebody I might
say well what do I respect about this
person
now I remember one particular guy said
what do I respect about him there was
this guy had stolen a bunch of my stuff
and I thought well at least he’s using
my stuff you know I do respect him he’s
at least using it he isn’t just sitting
back there right sitting on his haunches
here in sabe the least you me I respect
that well to respective Adam well well
he’s at least going for it and you know
even though I don’t think he’s doing for
the right reason he’s probably helping a
few people who knows you know and I
began to literally feel better that I
began asked myself this question what’s
actually funny about this that I hadn’t
noticed
great question ask yourself what’s
actually funny about this I hadn’t
noticed now again when you ask a
question you got to be willing to really
search for the answer if you got what
was great about those two the hood
noticed or look whose boat Google didn’t
know there’s a lot schumer thought that
i didn’t notice and guess what there’s
no way your brains not going to go for
it but if you ask with a sincere
interest and desire for an answer you
will get one if you keep asking and so
all sudden I started noticing things
about their humors I started laughing
hey listen we’ve all heard the phrase
someday we’ll look back and laugh on
this situation well if that’s really
true why wait why not look back and
laugh on it now wait four years before
you can feel good about something again
and the way to do it is change your
focus the way to change your focus is
use questions they’re much more powerful
than any other tool I’ve noticed I’ll
tell you why questions basically do
three things we ask a question number
one when you ask somebody a question it
instantly changes what they focus on and
therefore it changes the way you feel
instantly see if you’re feeling lousy
and I come along and I get you to answer
a question like well I missed your
question what is great in your life
right now you are well nothing I go on I
know nothing is but if there was
something it was great you know what
could be great in your life if I get you
to really think about it what it makes
your brain do is search your files and
you know what no matter how bad your
life may seem there
something great going on there’s no
doubt about it you know here you are and
all your friends is weaking or skiing
but you’re home studying for a big test
you feel cheated you feel left out you
feel hurt hey listen all you needs a
little contrast for yourself what’s
great right now this weekend you’re
studying things that can make a huge
difference in the quality of your life
forever
these people are going to work their
muscles and come back and probably
forget about that situation right or
you’re not in a Nazi concentration camp
there’s a little contrast for you you
get to be learning because you choose to
not because you’re forced to you’re
studying something that you chose to
study you’re actually creating a future
for yourself you’re getting to use your
brain there’s so many things you can
focus on you’re in a free country
you’re alive you’ve got friends you
people care about you doing millions of
things you can feel good about all you
have to do is change your focus and if
you don’t you end up like the John
Belushi’s of the world think about see
the choice is yours so if I ask you a
question like what could be great in
your life or what’s great right now if
you really think about it you can come
up with something think about it right
now what’s really great in your life
right now
what’s something that you feel really
great about think about it or what could
you feel great about if you wanted to as
you think about things that make you
feel great
notice how it makes you feel when you
think about that what about that why
does that make you feel great how does
that make you feel inside when you feel
those feelings and you know what you can
change your state instantly just by
focusing on that at any moment in time
so the first thing questions do is they
change our focus and therefore our state
immediately the second thing that
questions do is they change what we’re
deleting now remember in order to feel
unhappy you have to focus on the things
that would make you unhappy and you have
to delete all the great things that are
happening in your life
isn’t that true in other words every one
of us right now could get depressed
piece of cake all we have to do is focus
on all the tragedy that’s happening the
world right now even little pieces of it
children they’re dying right now
starvation we can make pictures in our
head of those bloated stomachs hearing
the cries of babies just as they pass
off into death
seeing flies eating their
how’s that for graphic at the same time
every one of us could be an absolute
total pleasure interrupts that pattern
of a picture you’re looking at and think
of something to create total pleasure
and you know what their resilient things
but to do that you have to stop focusing
you have to delete all the negativity in
the world and focus on things that make
it feel great so you could focus on a
relationship you have you could focus on
how much you’ve already learned in the
last six or seven or eight days you
could focus on the people that love you
you can focus on your ability as a human
being to change your life at any moment
in time you could focus on what learning
means to you you could focus on the Sun
you could focus on breathing fresh air
you could focus on the fact you live in
a free country you could focus on the
fact that you have a connection with
your Creator you could focus on anything
and feel incredible you could focus on
new babies being born this moment they
have a greater opportunity in life than
any time in our history there’s so much
we could focus on it feel good about the
challenge is this you must control it
through questions questions change what
we delete we’re always deleting human
beings we’re not going to stop deleting
things as long as we’re going to delete
things why not delete things that
disempower you and focus on the things
that empower you does that make sense
the third thing that questions do is
they help you to get access to resources
within yourself I’m a big believer that
anything you’ve ever wanted to
accomplish you’ve already got the
resources inside of you to make it
happen that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t
go out and learn from somebody else or
model the success of others I’m just
saying the things you need to succeed
are already in your core the resources
are there you just need to get access to
them by asking better questions I’ll
give an example
if I ask myself questions like gosh can
I really do this that creates a feeling
of doubt here that does that and that
feeling of doubt will keep me in a state
where I’m not going to get the most out
of myself but if instead I ask myself a
question like how can I make this thing
happen right now more powerfully than I
ever dreamed of and have fun doing it if
I keep asking that question my brain
will get access to more of my ability
because whatever I ask for my brain will
give me but if you ask your brain can I
really do this and you do it with a tone
of voice of doubt you are going to get
access to the resources called out
does that make sense if you think about
it the greatest communicators the
greatest teachers of all time were not
people that so much taught us as they
did ask us they share things with us but
they got us to use our own resources
they asked questions all the great
speakers have done this hey Martin
Luther King asked questions about a
dream John F Kennedy asked don’t ask
what your country can do for you ask
what you can do for your country he
wanted you to take the resources out of
yourself and contribute and expand our
country you must learn to ask obituaries
that empower you I want you to know that
I believe the success in my life has all
come down to one basic skill state
management on a consistent basis I’ve
learned how to manage my state and
therefore I’ve been able to get myself
to breakthrough and take action with
very few people around me were able to
do the same they were able to that’s
probably not the best description they
weren’t using their power because they
didn’t have access to all of it and I’ve
done that by every day doing things that
would increase my physical ability
flexibility power energy by the way I’m
moving the way I breathe and also by
consistently and daily conditioning
myself to ask the kinds of questions to
create the kinds of focus that moves me
towards larger levels of contribution
and joy and fun and success and passion
instead of the things that would pull me
down that would pull me to areas of
frustration and anger and giving up
listen there is no capability difference
between you and someone you consider to
be an ultimate role model of success the
only difference is they learn to use
their mind and body with more power on a
consistent basis they’ve learned a
manager state they’ve learned to use
their body effectively whether they know
it or not consciously doesn’t matter a
lot of people do things without being
aware of how they do it and they’ve
learned to control their mental focus
remember whatever we concentrate our
focus on consistently and strive to
learn from and make new distinctions
about we will get great at I don’t care
what it is if you focus on it daily and
you strive to be better you’re going to
make little distinctions that’ll make
you more and more effective every single
day so you better decide what you want
to focus on in your life and what you
want to experience on a daily basis
because that’s where your power is going
to come from that’s where your power is
going to
from that’s the genesis of your power I
want you to know that many things that
you think are impossible or difficult
are only difficult or impossible because
of the way you’re focusing on things
you’re focusing on how it can’t be done
and you can remember whatever you focus
on is what you get so if you focus on
how it can’t be done you are absolutely
right and no one’s going to prove you
wrong so why not focus on what’s
possible and create that I mean that’s
why I created things like the firewalk
seminar all I did was hold a new level
of possibility instead of focusing on
how it couldn’t be done when how it was
a terrible thing or something like that
I focus on hey this is an incredible
example of possibility and if other
people can do it my focus to my question
is if they can do it then how can we do
it how can I share it with other people
how could it be used as an empowering
experience it’s a lot of fun I did the
same thing with teach people wood
breaking you know I teach people how to
break wood karate style not in two years
but in about 20 minutes again not to
make them this powerful person but to
show them that by simply changing their
mental focus by controlling their
physical emotional state and by modeling
someone’s success that they can get
results in 30 minutes it takes most
people two years and they have what we
call a breakthrough literally I want you
to know that you have every right in any
moment of time to feel lousy to feel bad
they’ll feel sorry to feel hurt I am NOT
saying by this tape program that you
should never be disappointed or
frustrated or angry or anything else
because all of those emotions have their
place in their proper proportion hey
some of my greatest frustrations or
angers or upsets or would have driven
some of my greatest successes because
it’s made me search for more but see
what’s interesting is the pain drove me
but what changed me from other people
who just gave up is I ask better
questions
I found a way say what can I learn from
this how can I grow from this how can I
expand from this what can I take from
this experience that will empower me
what can I learn from this so I never
have to experience it again and by
asking empowering questions how can I
take advantage of this what’s the actual
benefit in this situation that I
probably hadn’t noticed I began to find
benefits whereas other people said why
did this happen to me why does this
always happen to me why did you do this
to me Lord how come I’m not smart enough
to pull this off why do I keep self
sabotaging see that’s the difference
between success and say
so I want you to know I’m not saying you
can’t feel bad I’m just saying when
you’re done feeling bad here’s how to
change and you may not want to spend
quite so much time feeling bad in the
future because feeling bad is based on
focus if you change your focus you can
feel good instantly right now at this
moment now so let me ask you a few
questions and what I’d like you to do
for your homework is designed some
questions every morning my life I wake
up and I ask myself questions now the
truth is you already do this too the
only problem is you’re not doing it
consciously
think about it when you’re shaving are
you thinking and talking to yourself
know that the process of thinking is
nothing but asking and answering
questions you’re doing it constantly
that’s where your thoughts come from
think about it now you might say well no
that’s not true or yes it is true if you
said no it’s true or yes it is it’s
because you ask yourself the question is
that true or something like it see some
of the questions you ask our
subconscious your brain is deciding all
the time if I get in this car if I turn
here what’s going to happen is that
guard coming too close or too far you’re
asking questions constantly
subconsciously but you’re also doing it
consciously when you’re shaving or
putting on your makeup or shampooing
you’re asking questions but it might be
questions like God why do I always have
to do this why do I have to go to work
today think about the kind of states
that those questions create and what
would be some more empowering questions
like what could I do today that would
make today more fun than ever before
what can I do that it would create a
breakthrough in my business what could I
do today to connect more with my family
members
I wonder what’s going to happen today
that’ll make me feel total pleasure for
no reason I wonder what I’ll see today
that I haven’t seen before
see those kinds of questions will
empower you if you’re bored because you
ask lousy questions probably ask
questions like why do I have to do this
why do we do this all the time why do we
always do these things versus looking
around saying God what could I notice
today that I haven’t noticed before see
what can I see that they haven’t seen
before
what can I smell today I haven’t snow
before see it’s called directing your
computer so here’s some questions you
might want to answer right now in your
own mind and notice how they make you
feel question one what are you really
most happy about your life
and what’s one of the things you’re most
happy about in your life right now and
answer that question in your own head
what are you most happy about in your
life right now or if your bangles
nothing what could you be happy about if
you wanted to be you ever ask a question
yourself and somebody said well I don’t
feel that way or I don’t think that way
so I know you don’t but if you did or if
you could what could you feel happy
about right now think about it have you
thought of something good
I’m answer question what about that
makes you happy third question how does
that make you feel really allow yourself
to feel don’t just go read your copy
feel the feelings what else are you
really happy about in your life right
now think of a second thing what else
are you really happy about in your life
right now what about that makes you feel
here’s the second question for you what
are you really excited about in your
life right now what are you really
excited about in your life right now
answer the question you’re not think
about it or what could you be excited
about if you wanted to be excited
definitely think about it oh come on you
got more things to be excited about
think what about that makes you excited
why does that make you excited how does
it make you feel what else you excited
about your life right now come on what
else what else are you really excited
about your life right now or could you
be excited about if you wanted to how
does that make you feel here’s a third
question for you what are you really
grateful for in your life right now what
are you really grateful for in your life
right now what are some of the things
you’re grateful for what could you be
grateful for if you wanted to be answer
the question honestly how does that make
you feel I want you to notice do you
feel state changes you answer these
questions from where you were a few
moments before that’s it so you can
change your state instantly and you can
make yourself feel great there’s so much
to feel grateful for if you want my
formula for wealth it’s real simple live
every day in an attitude of gratitude
see the more you feel like you have the
more you’ll experience in your life and
the more you’ll be willing to give see
make sure that you’re always trying to
give more than you take back and feel
grateful for everything you have and you
will be wealthy beyond your wildest
dreams but you got to control your focus
let me ask you another one what are you
really proud of in your life right now
what are you really proud about in your
life right now or what could you be
proud about in your life so far what are
what about those things makes you feel
proud how does that make you feel what
else are you really proud of in your
how does that make you feel here’s a
final question for you who do you really
love most in your life and who loves you
think about it and don’t just go oh my
mom my dad my brother my sister I did
that get some feeling step into those
experiences and feel what it feels like
think about who loves you and how that
makes you feel who do you love and how
does that make it feel to love that
person so much I had a question for you
what if every morning you started out
asking yourself a series of questions
that put you in this kind of state
there’s some real power to see the state
you’re in affects the way you look at
your whole world doesn’t it affects the
way you breathe the way you feel the way
you treat other people and your level of
success see a lot of people teaching
live do blench affirmations go mMmmm
mMmmm I’m happy and then your brain goes
B s all right now if you do affirmations
long enough they may work because your
brain may get bored and say well why am
i happy at which time it will search
your brain for an answer and then also
and you’ll feel happy that’s what
happens when you do affirmations or if
you go I’m happy I’m happy I’m happy I’m
happy I’m happy and you really create
the physiology of happiness you know
what I mean by that by using your voice
that way then what you’ve done is the
affirmation didn’t do it so much that’s
putting your body in that state so
affirmations are great but what only
notes questions are even more powerful
because now you have a reason to be
happy you’re not just jumping yourself
up and run around with what I call a
perma grin where people go why are you
happy and go I don’t know but it feels
good it’s better to have all these
reasons so every morning you stack more
reasons to be happy you come up with
more reasons that you’re proud more
reasons to be grateful more reasons to
feel excited about life more feelings of
love if you stack those every day you
literally anchor them in your nervous
system this is part of what I call
destiny technology’s controlling your
state you’re asking yourself effective
questions this is the power of focus and
here’s your exercise part your success
Journal and right now I want you to
write down five questions after you’ve
designed these five questions what I’d
like you to ask yourself to do is this
first of all let me ask you this if
every single morning you got up and
asked yourself five custom design
questions that put you in peak stakes
and they gave you lots of reasons to
feel phenomenal so you weren’t just some
guy out there again just bad
about how excited you are without any
reasons for it I’m not talking about
being somebody who’s just all pumped up
for no reason
but if everyday you came up with lots of
reasons and felt these powerful emotions
what would that do to the quality of
your life what would that do to your
days would it be worth developing some
new habits if your answer to these
questions is yes then I’d like to
challenge you to do something I’d like
you to develop a new habit a one that
will literally condition your nervous
system to associate powerful emotions
with waking up in the morning wouldn’t
that be nice
here’s what I want you to do if you’re
willing to take on the challenge for the
rest of this program approximately what
twenty two more days each morning I want
you to answer those five questions and
every time you answer them you’ve got to
create some feelings so if one of your
questions was what am I most excited
about my life you’ve got to come up with
at least two different answers and
you’ve got to think about why you’re
excited how great that makes you feeling
you got to actually feel the answer the
question two answers to each of your
five questions each morning again this
is not added work you’re already asking
questions you just may be asking
questions like oh gosh why do I have to
get up at this hour that may not be the
best question to ask when the alarm goes
off maybe you want to install a new one
that empowers you would you be willing
to do that for the rest of this 30-day
program now I don’t want you to do this
for the rest of your life because you
might get addicted a feeling excellent
for the rest of your life and gosh only
knows what would happen to you then so
don’t go any longer than these thirty
days for sure but it leaves for the
thirty days would you be willing to try
it okay then go for it so you know your
assignment design five questions that
will get resources out of you make you
feel phenomenal each day that will make
you get access to your real powered
ability every single day also I want to
say to you please use your success
journal to write down each day a little
bit about what’s happening to you what
are you noticing have you already begun
to notice that your attitude has changed
obviously but also if you notice that
maybe you’re willing to take some
chances you’re being more decisive
you’re taking some actions then maybe
more powerful in some of your
communication have you decided maybe to
take some actions like lose weight or
stop smoking and you’re like day three
or four of that or are you just feeling
better about the possibilities of your
future now that would each day you might
want to just keep a journal
I’ve down a couple of key ideas about
what you learn that day or what you’re
experiencing in your daily life besides
this program I kept journals for years
because I believe that if my life is
worth living it’s worth recording and
for me what journals are is a way to go
back and notice my growth because
otherwise what happens for a lot of us
is we get caught up but if you have a
journal you can look and see how you’ve
grown in your development in your
ability and where you are in your life
in addition your journals and things
that you can give later on to your
children someday they can look back and
learn from the lessons you’ve learned in
your life certain valuable I hope you’ll
decide to keep a success journal an
ongoing basis after this program but
seeding it yourself in the habit right
now for the next thirty days over the next 30 days
power of focus we if you recall in our
last session we’re talking about how to
really direct our states of mind and
emotion we said that everything that we
really want in our lives no matter what
it is whether it be family or friends or
relationship or money or business
success or acknowledging all those
things the only reason we want them is
what we think we’ll get out of them
which is a state change a certain level
of feeling within ourselves we also
found out our last tape that all
emotions every feeling we have is the
result of how we use our body that
emotions literally are nothing but
physiological storms and our brains if
you will and that we learned that by
using our bodies in certain ways by
using our voice our gestures our
breathing our facial expressions we
could radically change our states and we
also talked about the idea if you’re a
call of measuring our states where are
we on a scale from zero to ten ten being
absolutely empowered unstoppable
passionate zero being dead and noticing
are we at the appropriate level for what
we want to accomplish that for most
cases not all in mine but most wouldn’t
be nice deliver at level 8 9 or 10 or
above on a consistent basis how much
more juice would you have and so you
develop some exercises and discovering
how to move your body not like me not
like somebody else but like you do when
you really are feeling absolutely
excellent today what we want to do is
take on the second way we can manage our
states and the second way to change your
state at any moment in time as quickly
as you can think it is to control and
direct the focus of your mind what do I
mean by that well think about this the
only experience that you have of life
comes in two forms what you’re
physically feeling because of the
condition and use of your body at that
moment in other words if you’ve got
physical pain that’s obviously going to
affect your state there’s some kind of
tension for example or if you haven’t
had any sleep that’s certainly an effect
your state as well or if you’ve eaten
something that’s blown your blood sugar
sky-high then obviously that’s going to
affect your emotional states as well the
only other thing that really controls
your state is what are you paying
attention to right now at this moment
I mean let’s take an example have you
ever had a headache then even a massive
headache that you thought there’s no way
you would ever go away you’re really
deep pain now what do you do well most
people go get an aspirin what if instead
have you ever had it happen where
somebody asked you a question or
something needed to be done or something
acquired your total focus somewhere else
outside of yourself and a lamo
immediately the pain disappeared in fact
you forgot about it and later on when
you thought about it you notice your
headache was gone having had that happen
at least once or twice in your life now
how did you do that see my whole life
has been studying what makes people
successful if someone’s able to do
something if they’re able to get rapport
with somebody else if they’re able to
create the results they want physically
in their life added lose weight feel
energized if they’re able to create the
relationships that they really desire if
they’re able to feel as good as they
ever wanted to feel I want to know how
do they do that and so I began to study
how could somebody get rid of a deck
that quickly so we wouldn’t be dependent
on some drug like aspirin or Tylenol or
anything else and I began to realize
that what it was is we changed our
mental focus and that whatever
experiencing in our body really comes
from what we’re paying attention to
that’s what really determines how you
feel
and of course how you feel determines
usually how you’re going to behave does
that make sense when you’re feeling
really lousy you don’t usually do really
well I know they’re exceptions but those
exceptions are because you control your
focus you don’t focus on feeling lousy
you focus on what’s got to be done there
was tremendous power and controlling the
focus of your mind now what do I mean by
this specifically well there are two
things we can control in terms of focus
we can control what we’re focusing on
that is what we’re picturing in our mind
what we’re saying to ourselves what
we’re paying attention to in our
physical body or we can control how
we’re focusing how we’re focusing means
let’s say the dimension of the pictures
in our mind the brightness of the colors
in our head the volume of our sounds if
we change how we’re paying attention to
things not just what it radically
changes our state as well let me give an
example pretend for a moment that your
brain is a camera and you go to a party
how are you going to feel at that party
well the only thing you’re going to have
feelings about other things you focus on
I mean in that room literally
there are almost unlimited number of
activities and probably emotions and
conversations and things that are going
on but your experience of that party is
based on what that camera focuses on now
if it focuses on two people that are
fighting and that’s what it focuses on
for the entire party you would leave
that party saying oh that party was
really intense I mean people are really
upset with each other if your focus was
on two people in love or maybe guessing
passionately and say wow that party was
really moving I mean those people are
really connected if your focus was on
some people that were really boring or
bored it’s out nobody really enjoyed
that party
here’s the problem the problem is your
camera that is the focus that you have
does not usually take in everything
simultaneously your conscious mind can’t
there are only so many things you can
consciously focus on I mean think about
how many things right now you are not
paying attention to that are happening
at this moment there’s the blood
pulsating through your right ear you may
not even pay attention to it I mention
it now you might focus on there’s the
beat of your heart or you even noticing
that until I mentioned it
there’s the feel of maybe some air
coming from an air conditioning maybe if
you’re nearby or there’s the heat on
your skin or there’s the blinking of
your honor there are unlimited number of
things that are happening right now but
see here’s the thing about human beings
since we can’t focus on everything and
consciously perceive at all what most of
us do is we become what I call deletion
creatures what do I mean I mean that
most of the time most of us delete that
is we fail to pay attention to or we
ignore most of what’s going on around us
at any moment in time so what’s the
price of all this deletion well the
price is we walk around believing or
hallucinating might be a better word
that our experience of the world is real
now would you think that if you were
looking through a camera that was
focused on one little portion of the
party that that was truly the party that
wouldn’t be very intelligent with it in
fact you know what else is a problem
that camera may even create close-ups
where it makes things bigger than they
actually are what they look bigger and
brighter or worse than they were is that
possible – do you think your brain does
that as well you better believe it does
so the key is if you want your life
be a party that you’re happy with and
not a party that you’re upset with you
got to realize at any moment in time
there’s enough going on in the party of
your life that you could find something
to be upset about all you’ve got to do
is focus on all you got to do is now
look around that party find out areas
that don’t match your expectations make
them big and bright and close and you’ll
be upset and you know what most people
are good at this they’ve done it over
and over and over again
the other thing that’s equally true is
that virtually any party at any moment
in time there’s somebody having a good
time and if you were to focus on some
area of your life at that moment of time
you can make yourself feel absolutely
great or you could take some little
thing something that’s just kind of nice
but make it bigger and brighter and
immediately you can feel better about it
as well so here’s my point my point is
if you want to look at the quality of
life and know what it is it’s the
quality of the states that you live in
day to day I mean it’s not really true
isn’t it how you feel day to day the
determines how you treat yourself how
you treat other people and how great you
feel or how poor you feel about your
life what determines it one how you use
your body so you want to develop some
new habits and to what and how you focus
on things now that’s the only way we can
explain how people have come from
unbelievably painful experiences and
turn them around w Mitchell secret is he
has controlled his physical body
specifically the way he uses his face
this man has learned with what’s left of
his body to smile and move his face in
ways that makes him feel incredible and
the second thing is he focuses
continuously on what he wants what he’s
got what he’s grateful for and as a
result he feels incredible now nobody
would blame him for looking around and
seeing he has no legs and he has no
fingers got the toes there instead and
he’s in a situation where he’s in
physical pain a lot of the time nobody
would blame him for feeling sorry for
himself but see he doesn’t focus on that
he loves life because he focuses on the
part of the party that’s the best part
for him don’t you deserve to give
yourself the same gift now take a look
at John Belushi example we used earlier
also how could a guy like Belushi or
Presley or take somebody like Elizabeth
Taylor here’s a lady that would have
everything going for by most people
standards she’s an incredibly
intelligent woman she’s absolutely
beautiful she’s a great actress she has
thousands and thousands probably
millions of fans to be more accurate who
absolutely love her she has as much
money as most people could ever imagine
needing or wanting she has a lifestyle
that’s absolutely phenomenal she has
family and friends that care about her
and do anything for her and yet what
happens with this lady she has not
learned to manage her state and she pays
the price as great as she is great on
the stage but in her personal life over
and over again she has to turn to food
or the drugs that try and take care of
the challenges within herself see how
could someone have it all and still be
unhappy because no matter how good it is
you can always focus on something that
isn’t perfect or doesn’t match your
expectations and that is called ultimate
failure in life you want to know what I
believe success is success is creating
consistent pleasure in your life and
causing yourself to grow failure is
being able to find pain no matter how
good it is
that’s failure the bottom line is you
have that power and you can change it
right now by understanding that you make
decisions about what to focus on now it
may be true that you’ve got some bad
habits it may be true that right now you
look at what’s worse or you look at
what’s wrong or you see what’s not
working your life and it’s habitual so
you don’t think about it consciously but
you still make the decisions you can
turn off the automatic pilot and take
control and when you do you can
instantly change the quality of your
life the lady I married my wife Becky
one things I love about her more than
anything in the world the reason I
married her probably more than anything
else is this woman is so incredible at
her ability at any moment in time to
focus on what is great in a situation
what is beautiful most little things she
and I share that power where we can be
in the middle of anything the middle of
turmoil and upsets and frustrations and
in a heartbeat we can stop and we say
hey look notice that flower notice that
sunset or look in each other’s eyes and
say how did I get so lucky to get you we
have that ability and we share we
reinforce it in each other and it gives
power to our relationship and to our
lives
you have
that control all you have to do is
exercise it so what I want to do is be
more specific with you now and how to do
it first of all let me demonstrate this
is really true to you I mean you may say
well yeah this makes sense well let’s
take a quick example now this may be an
unfair situation if you’re in a place
that you’re familiar with but let’s try
this right now and if you’re in a place
you’re familiar with you might want to
try it later on in the day when you’re
not familiar with something but let’s
take an example here what I want you to
do right now is I’d like you if you
would let’s test the power of something
I want you to look around your room the
room you’re in right now or if you’re in
your car you can look out the windows
also but I want you to notice everything
you can see everything you can see and
I’m going to give you a few seconds that
is brown quick look around the room
everything you can see that’s brown the
Kuran your car look outside everything
you see is round quickly everything make
sure you don’t miss anything everything
you see is brown quick quick quick okay
stop close your eyes with your eyes
closed now close your eyes and you’re
driving this is difficult okay so you
might want to try this later as an
exercise but I’d like you to do is close
your eyes and what I want you to do with
your eyes closed now is tell me or you
know since I’m not there literally
although I may be you never know but
just for now outloud say everything
that’s in this room that is green oh
maybe I hooked you a little bit huh
you’re waiting for Brown tell me out
loud come on everything that’s green try
everything in the room that is white and
everything the room that’s red and now
open your eyes and look around the room
and notice everything you can see in
this room that’s green come on take a
good look now some of you may say well
there’s nothing to trim this green look
behind you there there’s something green
behind you that’s right
what’s blue in this room now do you see
a lot more green do you see a lot more
blue now than you did the first time
unless you’re in a room you already are
super familiar with that is you’ve
already got a picture in your head and
you know it like maybe it’s your bedroom
you know everything even then you may
not have noticed everything but if
you’re in a strange room or in a place
you’re not used to what I find is 99% of
the time people see a lot more blue and
green when I asked them
about that specifically later on in
other words when I asked you to focus on
brown that’s what comes up
you notice mostly brown you tend to
delete a lot of the other details isn’t
that true now how does that relate to
life see a lot of people in life stare
at and focus on the brown in life the
shall we say species of life and other
people they look for the green they look
for it’s growing they look for it’s
alive that’s what you need to do see in
life we get whatever we focus on
whatever you pay attention to that’s
what you experience in your body
instantly so how do we control our focus
well that’s a good question for years
I’ve been looking at it you know I read
all the books on positive thinking where
they said hey you want to do good you’ve
got to feel good that makes sense and if
you want the feel good you’ve got the
duck yourself good and picture good well
the challenge with that a challenge with
positive thinking is what we’ve already
talked about Tomalin positive thinking
is you got to think about it it’s a
little bit difficult we got to get
ourselves conditioned to think more
positive plus I kept asking the question
how do you think positive is a B
positive
how well I said you know make good
pictures allow you get yourself to do
that and so what I’ve analyzed for years
is what determines since there are
zillions of things you and I could pay
attention to at any moment what
determines what we focus on well some of
what we focus on or most of it is based
upon our beliefs of what’s important and
our values and we’re going to talk about
that in the next tape but for right now
the thing that at this specific moment
determines what you focus on is how
you’re evaluating things now that sounds
like a big chunk but what do I mean by
that well the way we evaluate things
determines how we feel but what is an
evaluation evaluations are nothing but
questions the way I found this out is
one day I was realizing well you know W
Mitchell is pretty happy because he’s
evaluated his life and what it makes him
happy John Belushi’s not here because of
the way he evaluated things he made
himself actually feel bad and he had
plenty could have felt good on if he
just focused on that part of his life’s
party if you will so I thought how do I
explain what an evaluation is and then I
noticed that I had asked a question to
try to evaluate how to explain
evaluations and I thought what is it
possible what evaluations or questions
I thought the question – isn’t it that’s
the question isn’t God is that really
one evaluation is is a question
and I thought was a question pretty soon
I looked myself in a trending began to
realize evaluations are in fact
questions and I try to mismatch it that
is I try to look at the opposite side
and I tested on all kinds of people
maybe you can find the opposite of what
I’m saying but I don’t know I have found
that thinking is nothing but the process
of evaluating things you’re always
evaluating what does this mean to me and
what should I do
those are two questions your brain is
asking on a continuous basis see if I
take my fist and I go wham and I bring
it within two inches of your face I
guarantee you your brain is going to
make some evaluations question number
one what does this mean question Emma do
what should I do and your brain is going
to evaluate it’s going to search your
brain for your beliefs about what does
this mean do I need to move is it going
to hit me what does this mean and what
should I do do I hit back do I just what
what does my body need to do we’re
always asking those two primary
questions but the questions we ask
determine what we focus on here let me
be more specific and I’ll think you’ll
have an example of what I mean I’ve said
to you so far in this tape that what you
focus on determines how you feel I’ve
also said that the questions you ask
yourself determine what you focus on
think of questions this way imagine your
brain is the ultimate computer and in
that computer is the answer to any
question you could possibly have and by
the way I believe that that metaphor is
really how your brain works
it can come up with the answer to any
question you’re asking Bible says ask
and you shall receive a very true and
real statement beyond what you might
believe religiously even if you have
different religious beliefs it is
reality in my experience of how our
brain works now if you have this great
computer and in front of you the only
way you get information out of this
computer is to ask for it you tap in to
this keyboard and you ask questions and
bam and answer the questions you will
get responses on the screen your brain
works the same way you ask questions you
hit the keyboard with questions and it
will fire off the answers in your brain
but here’s what’s different about your
brain than most computers whatever
question you ask if you ask it with the
absolute expectation that you’re going
to get an answer and as you ask it
consistently and you give you a brain
time to search for the answers you will
get an answer
by the way any question you ask you’re
going to answer to even one that doesn’t
have a basis in reality in other words
this computer will do anything it’ll
search it files and make things up in
order to answer your question what do I
mean well if you go around and ask your
brain why do these things always happen
to me well guess what your brain will
search all its databases and say why do
the involves happen to me and it’ll take
every possible form of input of what
people said to you in your life what
you’ve ever said to yourself which
you’ve ever read or saw on TV and I’ll
make up an answer for you it always
happens to you because you’re Turkey
that’s why right and I’m sure enough now
you feel lousy you see gosh I’m a turkey
you feel bad and everything is not
working out see whatever you ask you to
get an answer to if you say how come I’m
so lucky you know how did I get so lucky
your brain will search all kinds of
things and show you that you’re lucky in
other words our questions determine how
we feel now if you’ve got certain
emotions certain feelings that you have
on a daily basis that you don’t like
habitual emotions I’m here to tell you
that the feelings you feel are come from
what you focus on so what you have is
habitual focuses and those focuses come
from habitual questions in other words
if you feel certain ways on an ongoing
basis it’s because you’re asking certain
questions on an ongoing basis might be
useful if we discover what those are
I’ll give you some samples questions
that people ask themselves on a regular
basis that make them feel lousy
question number one is why does this
always happen to me I want you to notice
in that question is something we call a
presupposition a presupposition means
you are presupposing in the question the
things already happen to you that may
not be true but as long as you ask
questions that way your brain will make
up an answer for you and I’ll give it a
good example after the 1988 Republican
National Convention when George Bush
selected Dan Quayle as his running mate
CNN ran a public opinion poll where you
called a 900 number and vote yes or no
to the answer to a question but here is
the question it blew my mind question
was does it bother you that Dan Quayle
used his family’s influence to stay out
of Vietnam and to get in the National
Guard
now I’m paraphrasing just slightly but
that’s what they say
now tell me what’s wrong with this
picture and challenges they presuppose
that he actually did it they said does
it bother you so your brain stops
evaluating whether he actually did it or
not and focuses on whether it bothers
you or not does this happen every day
with you do you ask questions that
presuppose that you’ve got a limited
level of intelligence or skill or
ability and therefore get lousy answers
in your brain listen if you ask yourself
questions like why am I so fat that
question guarantees you’re going to stay
fat you know why cuz think oh why myself
at your brand ago okay let me figure out
the reasons lamo here’s why you’re fat
coz you eat continuously and you have no
control your brain goes oh oh good I
only control and you feel the useless
and you feel like you’re disempowered
what would be a better question to ask
yourself then why am I so fat how about
this one how can I become more thin
right now or what could I do today to
start myself on the road to becoming
more thin and what do I need to do
consistently to create the long-term
results of health that I want if you ask
a better-quality question you will get a
better quality answer or I’ll give you a
step beyond that if you ask a question
like how can I become more thin now
you’ll get an answer but what if you ask
a question like how can I become more
thin now and enjoy the process ah
magical when you ask that question what
happens now is you literally come up
with only an answer of how to lose
weight but also how to enjoy it and
since your brain likes pleasure there’s
a much better chance you’re going to
follow through am I making any sense to
you I’m here to tell you that the
quality of your life comes down to the
quality of the questions you ask
yourself on a daily basis so if you’re
asking questions like well how come I
can’t ever learn anything just listening
to that question or why can’t I ever
learn anything that’s even worse why
questions tend to be what I call endless
loop questions like why did this happen
to me see your brain probably can never
come up with a definitive answer it’ll
come up with all kinds of reasons but
you’ll keep going into a loop now I
discovered the power of questions in my
own life because at one time my life I
was really really angry and
anyone to change my physiology and my
movement to make myself feel better but
I didn’t want to you ever been in that
state like somebody said to me well Tony
just change your physiology and I don’t
want to alright I was upset but the
reason I was upset is what I was
focusing on I was focusing on somebody
who had taken a bunch of money for my
company and embezzled it and I got
pretty upset to say the least and I was
walking around in a frenzy going how
could he do this
how could he have the audacity to do
this I may have even had an expletive
her to who knows but the point is that
by asking those questions I was whipping
myself into frenzy
how could he possibly do this why would
he do this situation to me well guess
what you’re never going to get an answer
to that all it does is whip you into
more and more of a frenzy can you hear
it so finally I said okay doing this is
leading the more and more pain isn’t
making my life any better I better ask
myself a more empowering question so I
thought what’s something that’s
important to me my answer is I love to
learn I already shared that with you so
I said okay what can I learn from this
well guess what
my brain likes learning so it was
willing to focus on that question and
you know what out of that question of
what can I learn from this over the next
three months
I literally developed a whole new level
of understanding about what makes human
beings do what they do I develop
literally a whole new technology which I
call destiny technologies and I now do a
whole seminar called your date with
destiny only help people literally
design their life so they are literally
pulled forward in the direction they
want their life to be rather than having
all the self-sabotage and challenges
that come up for people the most
incredible program I do it all came out
of me taking a horrible situation and
asking a better question what kind of
learn from this what can I get out of
this that would enhance my life and
other people’s as well how can I use
this situation to create much more power
in my ability to help people and help
myself asking these questions allowed me
to search my brains data banks and
create tremendous power out of that
situation after I was in that situation
I had other times when I get upset I’m
terribly when I get upset because I’ve
asked me a why question why did this
person do this I don’t understand or how
could they possibly have done it because
I would never do that how could they do
that I’ll never get the answer based on
that so I learned to ask the question
what can I
learn from this now for you that might
not be the right question many learning
is not important enough for you at brain
to go while I’m willing to focus on that
now instead of the problem but my brain
I pick learning or I pick something like
well if I’m angry at somebody I might
say well what do I respect about this
person
now I remember one particular guy said
what do I respect about him there was
this guy had stolen a bunch of my stuff
and I thought well at least he’s using
my stuff you know I do respect him he’s
at least using it he isn’t just sitting
back there right sitting on his haunches
here in sabe the least you me I respect
that well to respective Adam well well
he’s at least going for it and you know
even though I don’t think he’s doing for
the right reason he’s probably helping a
few people who knows you know and I
began to literally feel better that I
began asked myself this question what’s
actually funny about this that I hadn’t
noticed
great question ask yourself what’s
actually funny about this I hadn’t
noticed now again when you ask a
question you got to be willing to really
search for the answer if you got what
was great about those two the hood
noticed or look whose boat Google didn’t
know there’s a lot schumer thought that
i didn’t notice and guess what there’s
no way your brains not going to go for
it but if you ask with a sincere
interest and desire for an answer you
will get one if you keep asking and so
all sudden I started noticing things
about their humors I started laughing
hey listen we’ve all heard the phrase
someday we’ll look back and laugh on
this situation well if that’s really
true why wait why not look back and
laugh on it now wait four years before
you can feel good about something again
and the way to do it is change your
focus the way to change your focus is
use questions they’re much more powerful
than any other tool I’ve noticed I’ll
tell you why questions basically do
three things we ask a question number
one when you ask somebody a question it
instantly changes what they focus on and
therefore it changes the way you feel
instantly see if you’re feeling lousy
and I come along and I get you to answer
a question like well I missed your
question what is great in your life
right now you are well nothing I go on I
know nothing is but if there was
something it was great you know what
could be great in your life if I get you
to really think about it what it makes
your brain do is search your files and
you know what no matter how bad your
life may seem there
something great going on there’s no
doubt about it you know here you are and
all your friends is weaking or skiing
but you’re home studying for a big test
you feel cheated you feel left out you
feel hurt hey listen all you needs a
little contrast for yourself what’s
great right now this weekend you’re
studying things that can make a huge
difference in the quality of your life
forever
these people are going to work their
muscles and come back and probably
forget about that situation right or
you’re not in a Nazi concentration camp
there’s a little contrast for you you
get to be learning because you choose to
not because you’re forced to you’re
studying something that you chose to
study you’re actually creating a future
for yourself you’re getting to use your
brain there’s so many things you can
focus on you’re in a free country
you’re alive you’ve got friends you
people care about you doing millions of
things you can feel good about all you
have to do is change your focus and if
you don’t you end up like the John
Belushi’s of the world think about see
the choice is yours so if I ask you a
question like what could be great in
your life or what’s great right now if
you really think about it you can come
up with something think about it right
now what’s really great in your life
right now
what’s something that you feel really
great about think about it or what could
you feel great about if you wanted to as
you think about things that make you
feel great
notice how it makes you feel when you
think about that what about that why
does that make you feel great how does
that make you feel inside when you feel
those feelings and you know what you can
change your state instantly just by
focusing on that at any moment in time
so the first thing questions do is they
change our focus and therefore our state
immediately the second thing that
questions do is they change what we’re
deleting now remember in order to feel
unhappy you have to focus on the things
that would make you unhappy and you have
to delete all the great things that are
happening in your life
isn’t that true in other words every one
of us right now could get depressed
piece of cake all we have to do is focus
on all the tragedy that’s happening the
world right now even little pieces of it
children they’re dying right now
starvation we can make pictures in our
head of those bloated stomachs hearing
the cries of babies just as they pass
off into death
seeing flies eating their
how’s that for graphic at the same time
every one of us could be an absolute
total pleasure interrupts that pattern
of a picture you’re looking at and think
of something to create total pleasure
and you know what their resilient things
but to do that you have to stop focusing
you have to delete all the negativity in
the world and focus on things that make
it feel great so you could focus on a
relationship you have you could focus on
how much you’ve already learned in the
last six or seven or eight days you
could focus on the people that love you
you can focus on your ability as a human
being to change your life at any moment
in time you could focus on what learning
means to you you could focus on the Sun
you could focus on breathing fresh air
you could focus on the fact you live in
a free country you could focus on the
fact that you have a connection with
your Creator you could focus on anything
and feel incredible you could focus on
new babies being born this moment they
have a greater opportunity in life than
any time in our history there’s so much
we could focus on it feel good about the
challenge is this you must control it
through questions questions change what
we delete we’re always deleting human
beings we’re not going to stop deleting
things as long as we’re going to delete
things why not delete things that
disempower you and focus on the things
that empower you does that make sense
the third thing that questions do is
they help you to get access to resources
within yourself I’m a big believer that
anything you’ve ever wanted to
accomplish you’ve already got the
resources inside of you to make it
happen that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t
go out and learn from somebody else or
model the success of others I’m just
saying the things you need to succeed
are already in your core the resources
are there you just need to get access to
them by asking better questions I’ll
give an example
if I ask myself questions like gosh can
I really do this that creates a feeling
of doubt here that does that and that
feeling of doubt will keep me in a state
where I’m not going to get the most out
of myself but if instead I ask myself a
question like how can I make this thing
happen right now more powerfully than I
ever dreamed of and have fun doing it if
I keep asking that question my brain
will get access to more of my ability
because whatever I ask for my brain will
give me but if you ask your brain can I
really do this and you do it with a tone
of voice of doubt you are going to get
access to the resources called out
does that make sense if you think about
it the greatest communicators the
greatest teachers of all time were not
people that so much taught us as they
did ask us they share things with us but
they got us to use our own resources
they asked questions all the great
speakers have done this hey Martin
Luther King asked questions about a
dream John F Kennedy asked don’t ask
what your country can do for you ask
what you can do for your country he
wanted you to take the resources out of
yourself and contribute and expand our
country you must learn to ask obituaries
that empower you I want you to know that
I believe the success in my life has all
come down to one basic skill state
management on a consistent basis I’ve
learned how to manage my state and
therefore I’ve been able to get myself
to breakthrough and take action with
very few people around me were able to
do the same they were able to that’s
probably not the best description they
weren’t using their power because they
didn’t have access to all of it and I’ve
done that by every day doing things that
would increase my physical ability
flexibility power energy by the way I’m
moving the way I breathe and also by
consistently and daily conditioning
myself to ask the kinds of questions to
create the kinds of focus that moves me
towards larger levels of contribution
and joy and fun and success and passion
instead of the things that would pull me
down that would pull me to areas of
frustration and anger and giving up
listen there is no capability difference
between you and someone you consider to
be an ultimate role model of success the
only difference is they learn to use
their mind and body with more power on a
consistent basis they’ve learned a
manager state they’ve learned to use
their body effectively whether they know
it or not consciously doesn’t matter a
lot of people do things without being
aware of how they do it and they’ve
learned to control their mental focus
remember whatever we concentrate our
focus on consistently and strive to
learn from and make new distinctions
about we will get great at I don’t care
what it is if you focus on it daily and
you strive to be better you’re going to
make little distinctions that’ll make
you more and more effective every single
day so you better decide what you want
to focus on in your life and what you
want to experience on a daily basis
because that’s where your power is going
to come from that’s where your power is
going to
from that’s the genesis of your power I
want you to know that many things that
you think are impossible or difficult
are only difficult or impossible because
of the way you’re focusing on things
you’re focusing on how it can’t be done
and you can remember whatever you focus
on is what you get so if you focus on
how it can’t be done you are absolutely
right and no one’s going to prove you
wrong so why not focus on what’s
possible and create that I mean that’s
why I created things like the firewalk
seminar all I did was hold a new level
of possibility instead of focusing on
how it couldn’t be done when how it was
a terrible thing or something like that
I focus on hey this is an incredible
example of possibility and if other
people can do it my focus to my question
is if they can do it then how can we do
it how can I share it with other people
how could it be used as an empowering
experience it’s a lot of fun I did the
same thing with teach people wood
breaking you know I teach people how to
break wood karate style not in two years
but in about 20 minutes again not to
make them this powerful person but to
show them that by simply changing their
mental focus by controlling their
physical emotional state and by modeling
someone’s success that they can get
results in 30 minutes it takes most
people two years and they have what we
call a breakthrough literally I want you
to know that you have every right in any
moment of time to feel lousy to feel bad
they’ll feel sorry to feel hurt I am NOT
saying by this tape program that you
should never be disappointed or
frustrated or angry or anything else
because all of those emotions have their
place in their proper proportion hey
some of my greatest frustrations or
angers or upsets or would have driven
some of my greatest successes because
it’s made me search for more but see
what’s interesting is the pain drove me
but what changed me from other people
who just gave up is I ask better
questions
I found a way say what can I learn from
this how can I grow from this how can I
expand from this what can I take from
this experience that will empower me
what can I learn from this so I never
have to experience it again and by
asking empowering questions how can I
take advantage of this what’s the actual
benefit in this situation that I
probably hadn’t noticed I began to find
benefits whereas other people said why
did this happen to me why does this
always happen to me why did you do this
to me Lord how come I’m not smart enough
to pull this off why do I keep self
sabotaging see that’s the difference
between success and say
so I want you to know I’m not saying you
can’t feel bad I’m just saying when
you’re done feeling bad here’s how to
change and you may not want to spend
quite so much time feeling bad in the
future because feeling bad is based on
focus if you change your focus you can
feel good instantly right now at this
moment now so let me ask you a few
questions and what I’d like you to do
for your homework is designed some
questions every morning my life I wake
up and I ask myself questions now the
truth is you already do this too the
only problem is you’re not doing it
consciously
think about it when you’re shaving are
you thinking and talking to yourself
know that the process of thinking is
nothing but asking and answering
questions you’re doing it constantly
that’s where your thoughts come from
think about it now you might say well no
that’s not true or yes it is true if you
said no it’s true or yes it is it’s
because you ask yourself the question is
that true or something like it see some
of the questions you ask our
subconscious your brain is deciding all
the time if I get in this car if I turn
here what’s going to happen is that
guard coming too close or too far you’re
asking questions constantly
subconsciously but you’re also doing it
consciously when you’re shaving or
putting on your makeup or shampooing
you’re asking questions but it might be
questions like God why do I always have
to do this why do I have to go to work
today think about the kind of states
that those questions create and what
would be some more empowering questions
like what could I do today that would
make today more fun than ever before
what can I do that it would create a
breakthrough in my business what could I
do today to connect more with my family
members
I wonder what’s going to happen today
that’ll make me feel total pleasure for
no reason I wonder what I’ll see today
that I haven’t seen before
see those kinds of questions will
empower you if you’re bored because you
ask lousy questions probably ask
questions like why do I have to do this
why do we do this all the time why do we
always do these things versus looking
around saying God what could I notice
today that I haven’t noticed before see
what can I see that they haven’t seen
before
what can I smell today I haven’t snow
before see it’s called directing your
computer so here’s some questions you
might want to answer right now in your
own mind and notice how they make you
feel question one what are you really
most happy about your life
and what’s one of the things you’re most
happy about in your life right now and
answer that question in your own head
what are you most happy about in your
life right now or if your bangles
nothing what could you be happy about if
you wanted to be you ever ask a question
yourself and somebody said well I don’t
feel that way or I don’t think that way
so I know you don’t but if you did or if
you could what could you feel happy
about right now think about it have you
thought of something good
I’m answer question what about that
makes you happy third question how does
that make you feel really allow yourself
to feel don’t just go read your copy
feel the feelings what else are you
really happy about in your life right
now think of a second thing what else
are you really happy about in your life
right now what about that makes you feel
here’s the second question for you what
are you really excited about in your
life right now what are you really
excited about in your life right now
answer the question you’re not think
about it or what could you be excited
about if you wanted to be excited
definitely think about it oh come on you
got more things to be excited about
think what about that makes you excited
why does that make you excited how does
it make you feel what else you excited
about your life right now come on what
else what else are you really excited
about your life right now or could you
be excited about if you wanted to how
does that make you feel here’s a third
question for you what are you really
grateful for in your life right now what
are you really grateful for in your life
right now what are some of the things
you’re grateful for what could you be
grateful for if you wanted to be answer
the question honestly how does that make
you feel I want you to notice do you
feel state changes you answer these
questions from where you were a few
moments before that’s it so you can
change your state instantly and you can
make yourself feel great there’s so much
to feel grateful for if you want my
formula for wealth it’s real simple live
every day in an attitude of gratitude
see the more you feel like you have the
more you’ll experience in your life and
the more you’ll be willing to give see
make sure that you’re always trying to
give more than you take back and feel
grateful for everything you have and you
will be wealthy beyond your wildest
dreams but you got to control your focus
let me ask you another one what are you
really proud of in your life right now
what are you really proud about in your
life right now or what could you be
proud about in your life so far what are
what about those things makes you feel
proud how does that make you feel what
else are you really proud of in your
how does that make you feel here’s a
final question for you who do you really
love most in your life and who loves you
think about it and don’t just go oh my
mom my dad my brother my sister I did
that get some feeling step into those
experiences and feel what it feels like
think about who loves you and how that
makes you feel who do you love and how
does that make it feel to love that
person so much I had a question for you
what if every morning you started out
asking yourself a series of questions
that put you in this kind of state
there’s some real power to see the state
you’re in affects the way you look at
your whole world doesn’t it affects the
way you breathe the way you feel the way
you treat other people and your level of
success see a lot of people teaching
live do blench affirmations go mMmmm
mMmmm I’m happy and then your brain goes
B s all right now if you do affirmations
long enough they may work because your
brain may get bored and say well why am
i happy at which time it will search
your brain for an answer and then also
and you’ll feel happy that’s what
happens when you do affirmations or if
you go I’m happy I’m happy I’m happy I’m
happy I’m happy and you really create
the physiology of happiness you know
what I mean by that by using your voice
that way then what you’ve done is the
affirmation didn’t do it so much that’s
putting your body in that state so
affirmations are great but what only
notes questions are even more powerful
because now you have a reason to be
happy you’re not just jumping yourself
up and run around with what I call a
perma grin where people go why are you
happy and go I don’t know but it feels
good it’s better to have all these
reasons so every morning you stack more
reasons to be happy you come up with
more reasons that you’re proud more
reasons to be grateful more reasons to
feel excited about life more feelings of
love if you stack those every day you
literally anchor them in your nervous
system this is part of what I call
destiny technology’s controlling your
state you’re asking yourself effective
questions this is the power of focus and
here’s your exercise part your success
Journal and right now I want you to
write down five questions after you’ve
designed these five questions what I’d
like you to ask yourself to do is this
first of all let me ask you this if
every single morning you got up and
asked yourself five custom design
questions that put you in peak stakes
and they gave you lots of reasons to
feel phenomenal so you weren’t just some
guy out there again just bad
about how excited you are without any
reasons for it I’m not talking about
being somebody who’s just all pumped up
for no reason
but if everyday you came up with lots of
reasons and felt these powerful emotions
what would that do to the quality of
your life what would that do to your
days would it be worth developing some
new habits if your answer to these
questions is yes then I’d like to
challenge you to do something I’d like
you to develop a new habit a one that
will literally condition your nervous
system to associate powerful emotions
with waking up in the morning wouldn’t
that be nice
here’s what I want you to do if you’re
willing to take on the challenge for the
rest of this program approximately what
twenty two more days each morning I want
you to answer those five questions and
every time you answer them you’ve got to
create some feelings so if one of your
questions was what am I most excited
about my life you’ve got to come up with
at least two different answers and
you’ve got to think about why you’re
excited how great that makes you feeling
you got to actually feel the answer the
question two answers to each of your
five questions each morning again this
is not added work you’re already asking
questions you just may be asking
questions like oh gosh why do I have to
get up at this hour that may not be the
best question to ask when the alarm goes
off maybe you want to install a new one
that empowers you would you be willing
to do that for the rest of this 30-day
program now I don’t want you to do this
for the rest of your life because you
might get addicted a feeling excellent
for the rest of your life and gosh only
knows what would happen to you then so
don’t go any longer than these thirty
days for sure but it leaves for the
thirty days would you be willing to try
it okay then go for it so you know your
assignment design five questions that
will get resources out of you make you
feel phenomenal each day that will make
you get access to your real powered
ability every single day also I want to
say to you please use your success
journal to write down each day a little
bit about what’s happening to you what
are you noticing have you already begun
to notice that your attitude has changed
obviously but also if you notice that
maybe you’re willing to take some
chances you’re being more decisive
you’re taking some actions then maybe
more powerful in some of your
communication have you decided maybe to
take some actions like lose weight or
stop smoking and you’re like day three
or four of that or are you just feeling
better about the possibilities of your
future now that would each day you might
want to just keep a journal
I’ve down a couple of key ideas about
what you learn that day or what you’re
experiencing in your daily life besides
this program I kept journals for years
because I believe that if my life is
worth living it’s worth recording and
for me what journals are is a way to go
back and notice my growth because
otherwise what happens for a lot of us
is we get caught up but if you have a
journal you can look and see how you’ve
grown in your development in your
ability and where you are in your life
in addition your journals and things
that you can give later on to your
children someday they can look back and
learn from the lessons you’ve learned in
your life certain valuable I hope you’ll
decide to keep a success journal an
ongoing basis after this program but
seeding it yourself in the habit right
now for the next thirty days over the next 30 days
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