[Applause]
hi guys hey that’s a good one thank you
my name is Sharda and then two days i’ll
be thirty-one then i’m doing absolutely
everything I wanted to do as a kid and
how I’m doing that is by asking myself
what are you doing what are you doing
what are you doing what you doing what
are you doing what crew whatever you do
me right so today we are going to talk
about several things and that’s about
coping with stress in everyday life and
how I do that is with four steps
self-evaluation accountability
affirmation and self-care so the first
part of this is that self-evaluation so
how I got to ask myself what I’m doing
is so my senior kind of line I failed
the class three times and during that
period of time I’m let’s go see in my
advisor my advisor asked me what was
wrong I couldn’t really put a finger on
it but I knew something was wrong but
I’m getting cried so for about 20
minutes I cried and he sat in silence
and didn’t say anything I didn’t say
anything I was just pretty much ashamed
and she signed my pit was for graduation
so I graduated college quietly I sold my
tickets for the miss my craigslist
because Bill Clinton came in a year and
I widely continued like in about three
months later I heard her son record work
on februari my mom Pattinson’s about
graduation and I told her I didn’t want
to have
party I begged her not to throw me a
graduation party for a bachelor’s degree
in food management and that’s when I
know something’s wrong so again I ask
you what are you doing what are you
doing because from here I knew something
was wrong and I asked myself what are
you doing so in order to take care of
whatever is going on with me I had to
hold myself accountable because
accountability starts with ch in
accountability takes form in many for
takes form in many ways it could be
notes relationships friendships but for
me in particular it’s notice so we can
start with post-it notes cellphone
reminders things that you can see that
can help you do anxious times and give
you reminders to smoke so again the
definition of accountability is the
definition of accountability is the
quality or state of being accountable an
obligation or willingness to accept
responsibility for your actions or
others so with that I’m going to ask you
guys to begin to write yourself love
letters often place them where you can
see them place them where they are
important and write down things you need
to know in order to keep moving forward
so another former accountability for
myself was finding your tribe and how
you do that is in 2014 me and my friend
established reestablished our companies
my friend started a production company
and I asked myself what am i doing again
as far as my clothing company kiss was
concerned so right before I set up a
meeting with my friend I went and
actually tried to make a quick buck now
we all know fast money is not the best
money and I ended up with a gun to my
head and they don’t get my pockets
friend and he tried to take my phone and
the process of taking my phone I asked
him why in broad daylight when he won’t
hurt me um desensitized to the fact that
violence begets violence and I was in
the neighborhood doing something I
is doing in the first place I continued
all my day after that and done with go
see Adrian told him about my day a
little bit and he seemed to be bothered
it didn’t really bother me which should
have been a red flag um so then they
today he said come over sorry contract
let’s get started so me being white I
have never done any type of business I
mean I was just like okay I’ll come sign
my contract I just know I want to make a
change I know I wanted to this on so
unbeknownst to me I signed a contract
that actually signed all of my licensing
to his company as well as a morality
contract that said if I did anything
that was not morally signed all business
with end and none of the items that I
created will be available to me so my
friend my great great great friend
actually put me in a position to hold me
fully accountable on every aspect of my
life and every piece of my life to keep
the only thing that I desired anyway and
that their folks is how you’re trying
and accountability go hand it in and
that’s why I’m here right now so again I
ask yourself and I ask you what are you
doing find your friends that hold you
were responsible and author people who
will hold you to a level responsibility
for yourself others and the community so
what are you doing se1 what are you
doing come on guys what are y’all doing
yeah I had said but what you’re doing
thank you now look at your neighbor and
ask them the same thing right all right
maybe a change some numbers later and
say what are you doing text each other
hang out you never know so the last part
of this process is the most vital which
is speaking it thinking it and saying it
out loud writing it down and getting out
of your own way the last part of this is
self-care the most important part of
this is speaking it sinking it
making sure you make it a part of your
existence say it out loud write it down
and get out of your own way wheels
Millennials are different where the most
educated with the least jobs so that
means we have to find our way don’t be
afraid of that don’t be scared of that
and don’t let anyone tell you that your
path is not the right back for you since
this is a mindset success is defined by
you and your life don’t forget right
you’re shorting right it proud and make
sure you know what you are doing what
you doing so as Millennials success
again is what you make it we are
different it is ok don’t worry about
everybody’s man you sleep on your mom’s
couch oh well it is what it is make the
best of it but then the process keep
your feet moving forward and on the
ground and before you look up everything
will change it’s ok it is definitely
okay that we’re different define success
on your own terms make sure that all
you’re saying your spaces are safe make
sure you define your life again remember
you’ll define your life and remember
everything takes time so make sure you
laugh make sure you shared make sure you
care and again remember that your life
is yours write your story make sure you
enjoy every single second and again
don’t work you what are you doing what
are you doing what are you doing what
are you doing so again make sure you ask
yourself often what are you doing make
sure you follow those four steps then
make sure you enjoy yourself among the
one thank you Miss Phaedra [Applause]
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