I’m a clinical health psychologist and I
specialize in treating combat related
post-traumatic stress disorder or PTSD I
help people cope with the trauma of war
trauma can have a big impact on the
brain which comes out through thoughts
emotions and behaviors with PTSD the
nervous system is hijacked if a soldier
survived a bombing the brain might say I
will never let that happen again and may
react to something back home like
fireworks as if there’s a similar level
of threat but there’s not logic is
overridden and the survival brain is in
control it’s very disruptive as a
psychologist I’ve studied for years how
to treat the effects of negative
experiences and I’m currently working
with the world’s largest Research
Consortium for post-traumatic stress the
bulk of my work and PTSD has been in
using cognitive behavioral therapy which
boils down to facing thoughts and facing
fears to retrain the survival brain it’s
very effective and it’s not just for
PTSD it’s effective for many other
issues as well the common thread for
symptom improvement often comes down to
one key thing do the opposite of what
feels right get counterintuitive with
depression getting active helps with
insomnia getting out of bed and
restricting sleep help and with anxious
thoughts thinking positive is not the
answer that would make too much sense
the brain is so much more complicated
than that
getting counterintuitive means welcome
the worst of the thoughts examine them
feel the discomfort to move through them
and make lasting change how many of you
have ever had to give a presentation but
what about feeling nervous to drive
after a car accident anxiety in
situations like this is normal but doing
what anxiety tells you to do
the fear instincts what they tell you to
do to quit or avoid creates a bad cycle
getting counterintuitive to face
discomfort helps us stay functioning and
healthy one in four people will
experience significant mental health
issues and most of us struggle with
something a little depression anxiety
difficulties and relationships no one is
immune to struggles I’ve treated the
same symptoms in someone facing
homelessness as I have in doctors and
judges and I too have had to face my own
mental health difficulties which is not
what a psychologist usually talks about
when I was 19 away at college I woke up
in the middle of the night and there he
was standing over me was a man a
stranger in my apartment in my room with
the door closed staring down at me I was
confused and terrified and screamed
think about that moment for a second
what would you do your wife or your
daughter when I screamed the intruder
ran thankfully the police said that
they’ve been trying to catch him and he
had hurt other people so I was lucky for
months I slept with a hammer under my
pillow to cope but my true struggle laid
dormant until years later during the
high stress of graduate school when the
trauma flooded back I began to have
nightmares about this waking up I
couldn’t tell what was reality versus a
dream I felt unsafe sleeping in fact I
wasn’t really sleeping I kept trying to
make I kept wanting to make sure all the
doors were locked and was even putting a
chair in front of the door because it
made me feel safer if someone were to
break in maybe I would hear it and wake
up this was starting to affect my daily
life and the irony was I was spending my
days helping others with post-traumatic
stress and anxiety in my patients I
began to see myself that was happening
to me I realized that I was hijacked by
my survival brain the real threat was in
the
past miles away I was living in a very
locked insecure small building but the
survival brain pays attention to threat
and fear not logic and it was making me
choose thoughts and actions that seemed
like they were helping me manage my fear
but they were only maintaining it what
felt like managing was only maintaining
I knew I had to break the cycle I knew I
had to face my fears and stop responding
to my brain survival instincts I had to
get counterintuitive and so but
grudgingly I began to go to bed with my
front door unlocked unlocked it was
terrifying and a huge struggle just as I
guide my patients to do I took a deep
look at my catastrophic thoughts and
actively worked to put them into context
after a couple of nights passed and
nothing bad happened
my survival brain started to learn that
there wasn’t somebody outside my door
just waiting for the chance to get in
and the reality must be that I was safer
than I thought my symptoms started to
lift as my survival brain and nervous
system chilled out through leaving the
door unlocked and getting
counter-intuitive I also unlocked myself
from my anxious cycle we always need to
lock our doors but it shouldn’t be
something as attached to anxiety and
fear when it is that’s a sign when you
to make a change because it’s the
anxiety that’s in control we aren’t we
also need survival instincts and gut
feelings can serve us well but if this
threat isn’t immediate if there’s a
certain negative emotion you just can’t
shake or you notice yourself with the
same old struggle yet again pay
attention it’s here the trusting sneaky
misplaced instinct maybe keeping a
problem locked in how many of you
whether you do it or not believe that
physical exercise is important for
health
pretty much everyone because we know
that it is would you agree that mental
emotional well-being is also important
for overall health of course it is and
brain exercise can help us maintain
it research shows that getting
counterintuitive going against your own
grain it helps flex the brain muscles or
neural connections that help us stay
balanced we can strengthen the area of
the brain called the frontal lobe which
is a key region in helping us maintain
and control and regulate emotion
attention and behavior doing exercise
for your brain might be as small as not
scratching an itch but simply observing
it or as large as not running away from
a situation out of fear but moving into
it mindfulness is a great brain exercise
it’s about just simply observing without
judging or reacting you can do it
anywhere I want you all right now
to just simply notice what it’s like to
be where you are listening noticing who
or what is next to you around you and
also notice what your next inhale feels
like anchor yourself in this moment when
you control your attention like that
you’re exercising the frontal lobes you
can be more aware of what emotion you’re
experiencing and then also then act
intentionally rather than automatically
you can practice that at any point check
in with yourself throughout the day
noticing what emotion you’re
experiencing and then how your actions
might be guided by that if you’re
feeling uncomfortable or nervous
standing like this tends to reinforce
that cycle and change how people act
toward you if instead you stand like
this you break your own cycle and can
create a new reality how many of you
have ever gotten angry in traffic don’t
lie getting angry is normal but can be
damaging if it’s happening consistently
instead of allowing that instinct to
rule your mood and affect your health
notice the uprising frustration and then
replace angry behavior which will only
reinforce the frustration with the
opposite welcomed the time in the car
practice wishing others well find a
podcast practice deep breathing or pick
up the harmonica both hands on the wheel
when the car is moving please
getting counterintuitive can help not
only us but also those around us when
someone comes to us feeling bad and
makes us feel bad and we want to change
it to make it better but that’s a little
bit of the survival brain sneaking in
saying this is dangerous fix it getting
counterintuitive might be to provide
space for the struggle sit in the muck
of it together research so is that
simple human connection can be more
healing than problem-solving or thinking
positive we all answer to a similar
brain and life can be tough am i right
we will all have our struggles
guaranteed these cycles are very
complicated and getting professional
help when it gets too much or better yet
getting a head start before it gets that
point is a great idea sometimes the
counterintuitive approach is to simply
acknowledge the struggle be open about
it through being open about our own
difficulties actively working on
ourselves and practicing empathy toward
others together we can better support
the mental health of humanity my
traumatic experience and getting
counterintuitive changed my life and so
has helping other people in this way I
stand here today on this red dot as a
clinical psychologist and also a fellow
human who gets tripped up on my own
brain to tell you that we all need to be
thinking more counter-intuitively to
stretch grow and break negative patterns
so what do you struggle with what is one
counterintuitive shift you can make
today that will help you go against your
grain a benefit of being human is that
we can override our own biology to train
the brain for a healthier state I
challenge us all to step more into the counterintuitive life thank you