[Applause]
[Music]
how do you motivate someone no one he
has an executive coach
I’m absolutely bombarded with this
question and I don’t blame them see the
truth is you really can’t motivate
anyone to do anything they don’t want to
at least not the way you think you can
see this question always makes me think
back to my childhood I’ll admit it
growing up I was a serious pain in the
ass for the first 10 years of my life I
refuse to eat almost anything my poor
parents they’d get so worried they’d
take me to the doctor’s thinking that
was something physically or mentally
wrong with me
now I’m not saying they’re wrong but in
this case it wasn’t quite the case
I remember for years they tried to force
me my mom would pull out the trusty old
wooden spoon or take the slipper right
off her foot and just smack me to the
back of the head
parenting must have been so fun in the
80s she’ll also be the first to tell you
that it didn’t work right I also
remember for years they tried to bribe
me and I gotta say oh they were getting
warmer she had a she had a weakness for
ice cream so as long as I’d want dessert
I had finished my food but even the
sweet taste of haagen-dazs actually I’m
lying I don’t know if anyone’s old
enough to remember it was actually
heavenly hash back in the 80s my OC
haagen-dazs for the youngins today right
I’ve dated myself mmm
but even the sweet taste of haagen-dazs
gonna motivate me to eat all the time
then one day I remember I was just
sitting there and my mom shows up she’s
got a slipper in one hand
hey my and got in she’s got the ice
cream in the other and she just looks so
defeated and discouraged it’s like she
gave up he’s like oh and she asked me
what do you want to eat
I even hungry and I was like wait a
minute you mean I have a choice
wah-wah but jackpot now don’t get me
wrong I’m not trying to convince you to
feed your kids junk food or anything
like that I’ll get a bunch of hate mails
tomorrow but my parents approach taught
me that there are three ways you can
motivate someone you can beat them with
a slipper to the back of the head you
could bribe them with ice cream or you
can empower them with choice so what
does this have anything to do with the
modern workplace well you don’t have to
think back to the days of ancient Egypt
to find examples of bosses beating their
employees now do you it happens all the
time maybe not physically I hope but it
either sounds or feels something like
this shut up and do your job that’s what
I pay you for
is that familiar as it is to me and the
reason they get away with this is
because they use a hybrid system of
beating and bribing after all isn’t that
what a salary is a form of bribe I mean
let’s be real and be brutally honest
with me if it wasn’t for money how many
of you would go to work
your bosses aren’t here so they can’t
see you but I counted about four you
want to try that again not too many I’m
kind of happy to see a few though it
means there’s hope it means there’s hope
see one of the worst questions you hear
is when you go for an interview and they
ask you why do you want to work here
it’s just like I don’t hey I like you
see everyone knows the answer is money
at least most of the time and it’s
almost as though they expect you to lie
to them a little bit right I mean can
you imagine someone walking and being
like well I’d really like to just come
into this poorly lit office and spend
about 40 hours a week in this tiny
cubicle I’d like to answer about a
hundred emails and phone calls a day and
if you can I’d really appreciate it if
you can make my job as stressful as
possible and if you can make my life a
living hell
imagine see the question shouldn’t be
why do you want to work here for the
very least it should sound a little bit
more like other than money why do you
think you’d want to work here and sadly
for so many leaders out there just like
ice cream money is slowly losing its
power
it’s the employee that’s now saying well
other than money why do I want to work
here can you imagine the panic that’s
settling in right now
no wonder motivation is such a hot topic
so what is it what is motivation well
the way I see it if I want you to do
something for me I got to give you
something back right and probably has to
be something you want so I broken it
down to two basic steps find out what
they want and give it to them that’s
pretty much it and it would be so much
easier if money was all that we wanted
but it isn’t is it why why is money not
enough the short answer is that the buzz
just doesn’t last right I’m sure you’ve
heard it all before
think about that time you got that new
job or the raise the car the smartphone
in your pocket and you tell me how long
did the buzz last for me maybe two weeks
max and if you’re lucky maybe about
three months so unless you’re going to
give your employees a raise at least
what every three months us every season
you’re gonna have a hard time motivating
them so if money’s not the answer what
is I prefer to start with the question
why does anyone want anything see that’s
the key right there I spent quite a bit
of time thinking about this question
when I found the answer I was like
you’ve got to be kidding me
it was right there so I’ll ask you this
and please interact this time okay who
here wants to be miserable
no her stupid question right let me see
if I can top that one who wants to be
happy and have their lives filled with
joy did I even have to ask seems quite
obvious right but if I know this and
clearly you all know this
why don’t organizations know this why
don’t we use this knowledge to our
advantage
see it turns out that joy and the
pursuit of happiness is the reason
behind every single decision and action
you and I have ever taken
it’s why you start dating someone or
break up with them it’s why someone
might smoke and refuse to quit it’s also
why some of you might be texting right
now we’re taking a nap instead of
listening to me talk see joy is the
common denominator that connects us all
heroes and villains alike and it’s found
in our values and our abilities to meet
them so if you want to know how to
motivate someone find out what makes
them happy what brings them joy and help
them achieve it
so the only question left to ask is
where do people find joy at work and
that’s where I come in
see my job is to basically help my
clients figure out what they want which
is so much harder than you can imagine
and I think it’s because we’re not used
to being asked this question let alone
taking the time to answer it properly I
also like to make sure that what they
want is what they really want that it’s
directly connected to their joy and the
reason I do this is because I want to
make sure that they’ll be committed
enough and motivated enough to achieving
their goals and by doing this I start to
notice a pattern it’s kind of like
Maslow’s hierarchy just different I call
it the hierarchy of joy what a name and
I love it trademark and the way it works
is simple see what I found is that most
everything we want falls under one of
three categories I don’t have a
PowerPoint so I’ll do with my hands it’s
a pyramid and we can either want to have
do or be something and what that means
is that our sources of joy can either be
external such as money and material
possessions interactive such as
relationships and how we experience life
and finally internal like who we are and
who we want to become and as you’d
expect the higher you go up that scale
the more profound controllable and
sustainable joy tends to be so it’s no
wonder that if you were to ask a
Buddhist monk what they want they’d say
from what I read it’s also not as
surprising when I asked my clients the
same thing I hear about a hundred
different answers other than money see
some fine joined the people they work
with in a sense of community and
belonging some find it in purpose that
their jobs in their lives have meaning
some find in their leaders and whether
they’re inspired to be a better version
of themselves see the answers are as
personal and as unique as the individual
and it’s up to us to find out what makes
them tick so if we want a happy
productive motivated workforce we need
to inspire positive change and humanize
the corporate experience we need to
embrace empathy and master the arts of
powerful questioning and listening we
need to become highly curious about what
makes people happy and help them achieve
it and all we have to do is ask what
brings you joy and how can I help
so what type of leader would you want to
be one that beats them to the back of
the head with a slipper one that bribes
them with ice cream hmm or one that
maximizes their potential by empowering
them with choice the power to choose joy
see if we’re going to adapt to the next
generation we need to evolve because
whether we like it or not their
motivation may very well be beyond money
thank you
[Applause]
[Music]
how do you motivate someone no one he
has an executive coach
I’m absolutely bombarded with this
question and I don’t blame them see the
truth is you really can’t motivate
anyone to do anything they don’t want to
at least not the way you think you can
see this question always makes me think
back to my childhood I’ll admit it
growing up I was a serious pain in the
ass for the first 10 years of my life I
refuse to eat almost anything my poor
parents they’d get so worried they’d
take me to the doctor’s thinking that
was something physically or mentally
wrong with me
now I’m not saying they’re wrong but in
this case it wasn’t quite the case
I remember for years they tried to force
me my mom would pull out the trusty old
wooden spoon or take the slipper right
off her foot and just smack me to the
back of the head
parenting must have been so fun in the
80s she’ll also be the first to tell you
that it didn’t work right I also
remember for years they tried to bribe
me and I gotta say oh they were getting
warmer she had a she had a weakness for
ice cream so as long as I’d want dessert
I had finished my food but even the
sweet taste of haagen-dazs actually I’m
lying I don’t know if anyone’s old
enough to remember it was actually
heavenly hash back in the 80s my OC
haagen-dazs for the youngins today right
I’ve dated myself mmm
but even the sweet taste of haagen-dazs
gonna motivate me to eat all the time
then one day I remember I was just
sitting there and my mom shows up she’s
got a slipper in one hand
hey my and got in she’s got the ice
cream in the other and she just looks so
defeated and discouraged it’s like she
gave up he’s like oh and she asked me
what do you want to eat
I even hungry and I was like wait a
minute you mean I have a choice
wah-wah but jackpot now don’t get me
wrong I’m not trying to convince you to
feed your kids junk food or anything
like that I’ll get a bunch of hate mails
tomorrow but my parents approach taught
me that there are three ways you can
motivate someone you can beat them with
a slipper to the back of the head you
could bribe them with ice cream or you
can empower them with choice so what
does this have anything to do with the
modern workplace well you don’t have to
think back to the days of ancient Egypt
to find examples of bosses beating their
employees now do you it happens all the
time maybe not physically I hope but it
either sounds or feels something like
this shut up and do your job that’s what
I pay you for
is that familiar as it is to me and the
reason they get away with this is
because they use a hybrid system of
beating and bribing after all isn’t that
what a salary is a form of bribe I mean
let’s be real and be brutally honest
with me if it wasn’t for money how many
of you would go to work
your bosses aren’t here so they can’t
see you but I counted about four you
want to try that again not too many I’m
kind of happy to see a few though it
means there’s hope it means there’s hope
see one of the worst questions you hear
is when you go for an interview and they
ask you why do you want to work here
it’s just like I don’t hey I like you
see everyone knows the answer is money
at least most of the time and it’s
almost as though they expect you to lie
to them a little bit right I mean can
you imagine someone walking and being
like well I’d really like to just come
into this poorly lit office and spend
about 40 hours a week in this tiny
cubicle I’d like to answer about a
hundred emails and phone calls a day and
if you can I’d really appreciate it if
you can make my job as stressful as
possible and if you can make my life a
living hell
imagine see the question shouldn’t be
why do you want to work here for the
very least it should sound a little bit
more like other than money why do you
think you’d want to work here and sadly
for so many leaders out there just like
ice cream money is slowly losing its
power
it’s the employee that’s now saying well
other than money why do I want to work
here can you imagine the panic that’s
settling in right now
no wonder motivation is such a hot topic
so what is it what is motivation well
the way I see it if I want you to do
something for me I got to give you
something back right and probably has to
be something you want so I broken it
down to two basic steps find out what
they want and give it to them that’s
pretty much it and it would be so much
easier if money was all that we wanted
but it isn’t is it why why is money not
enough the short answer is that the buzz
just doesn’t last right I’m sure you’ve
heard it all before
think about that time you got that new
job or the raise the car the smartphone
in your pocket and you tell me how long
did the buzz last for me maybe two weeks
max and if you’re lucky maybe about
three months so unless you’re going to
give your employees a raise at least
what every three months us every season
you’re gonna have a hard time motivating
them so if money’s not the answer what
is I prefer to start with the question
why does anyone want anything see that’s
the key right there I spent quite a bit
of time thinking about this question
when I found the answer I was like
you’ve got to be kidding me
it was right there so I’ll ask you this
and please interact this time okay who
here wants to be miserable
no her stupid question right let me see
if I can top that one who wants to be
happy and have their lives filled with
joy did I even have to ask seems quite
obvious right but if I know this and
clearly you all know this
why don’t organizations know this why
don’t we use this knowledge to our
advantage
see it turns out that joy and the
pursuit of happiness is the reason
behind every single decision and action
you and I have ever taken
it’s why you start dating someone or
break up with them it’s why someone
might smoke and refuse to quit it’s also
why some of you might be texting right
now we’re taking a nap instead of
listening to me talk see joy is the
common denominator that connects us all
heroes and villains alike and it’s found
in our values and our abilities to meet
them so if you want to know how to
motivate someone find out what makes
them happy what brings them joy and help
them achieve it
so the only question left to ask is
where do people find joy at work and
that’s where I come in
see my job is to basically help my
clients figure out what they want which
is so much harder than you can imagine
and I think it’s because we’re not used
to being asked this question let alone
taking the time to answer it properly I
also like to make sure that what they
want is what they really want that it’s
directly connected to their joy and the
reason I do this is because I want to
make sure that they’ll be committed
enough and motivated enough to achieving
their goals and by doing this I start to
notice a pattern it’s kind of like
Maslow’s hierarchy just different I call
it the hierarchy of joy what a name and
I love it trademark and the way it works
is simple see what I found is that most
everything we want falls under one of
three categories I don’t have a
PowerPoint so I’ll do with my hands it’s
a pyramid and we can either want to have
do or be something and what that means
is that our sources of joy can either be
external such as money and material
possessions interactive such as
relationships and how we experience life
and finally internal like who we are and
who we want to become and as you’d
expect the higher you go up that scale
the more profound controllable and
sustainable joy tends to be so it’s no
wonder that if you were to ask a
Buddhist monk what they want they’d say
from what I read it’s also not as
surprising when I asked my clients the
same thing I hear about a hundred
different answers other than money see
some fine joined the people they work
with in a sense of community and
belonging some find it in purpose that
their jobs in their lives have meaning
some find in their leaders and whether
they’re inspired to be a better version
of themselves see the answers are as
personal and as unique as the individual
and it’s up to us to find out what makes
them tick so if we want a happy
productive motivated workforce we need
to inspire positive change and humanize
the corporate experience we need to
embrace empathy and master the arts of
powerful questioning and listening we
need to become highly curious about what
makes people happy and help them achieve
it and all we have to do is ask what
brings you joy and how can I help
so what type of leader would you want to
be one that beats them to the back of
the head with a slipper one that bribes
them with ice cream hmm or one that
maximizes their potential by empowering
them with choice the power to choose joy
see if we’re going to adapt to the next
generation we need to evolve because
whether we like it or not their
motivation may very well be beyond money
thank you
[Applause]
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