[Music]
people ask me very often how come in
this craziness how can you stay so calm
craziness I mean all the family our
family members scattered around the
world and crazy political life here and
my answer well in fact it’s not easy it
has not been easy and it was a learning
process to keep the calmness somehow it
was a process of of months and months
and finally the secret of my calmness is
in the rabbits on my fridge this is my
fridge and these are little rabbits from
a Dutch children’s book this rabbit is
called nan Chu in Dutch in English is
translated as Miffy so for me Miffy is
represents balance for me Miffy a
balance is is a Dutch value and probably
all the activities that may feed us I
also want to do them during the day so
I’m trying to do all the activities you
see culture caring for others family
reading personal care and so on I try to
do other things and in the end to have
all my miffy’s on the right so what do
you see here this is a spectrum of all
colors ranging from back black to white
do you see how many colors how many
shades of gray there are between black
and white
the balance is somewhere in the middle
the balance is
how you look at it of course yes and
look at the Dutch sky
it’s full of shades of grey and this is
also a theory that whatever you look at
in your own environment your landscape
it influences your own attitude it
influences your mentality so maybe it’s
because of all these colors of grey in
the Dutch sky that we try to find a
balance
we don’t think black and white we try to
find a compromise we try to see the
nuances and to find the middle way the
golden middle way and not to judge too
easily
so this looking for compromises this
looking for all the shades of grey
between black and white this is called
the polder model it’s called like that
in politics for example this is Georgia
full of extremes it’s either very hot or
it’s very cold you have either high
peaks or you have deep green valleys has
this anything to do with the way we look
at things the black and white spectrum
that I was talking about and maybe there
is a way without destroying the Caucasus
to find more balance in our daily lives
and with this little presentation thanks
to TEDx to policy I want to give it a
try and tell you about different kinds
of balanced physical social generational
nature is based on balanced nature is
balanced nature takes care if of course
humankind
doesn’t interfere so also the human body
is of course a part of nature and there
is a balance in our bodies called the
acid-base balance of the ph value and if
we don’t take good care of our bodies
our body will protest so let’s talk
about food
the food intake is very important to
keep a balance in our bodies we need
from every group something every day at
every meal if we can cereals meat and
dairy and the biggest group is fruits
and vegetables we should eat much more
of those and so when I was a public
figure and I thought how can I survive
in all this working lunches dinners
receptions I cannot eat all the time and
still you know be nice to people and
then all the time refuse you can’t do
that
so I had to make choices to survive and
one of my tactics was when you’re
sitting at a state dinner for example to
call the waiter and to make him somehow
your friend and to ask okay can you
please skip the soup for me and can you
not put any sauce on my dressing and
maybe you will give me extra water
things like that so I always try to
manipulate somehow not to eat much this
is a way so as a believer in balance you
have to really try to think through the
meals the moments of meal in your day so
when you go out in the morning where
will will I have lunch where will I have
dinner am I going to travel then I
should take something let that something
be a banana or a carrot or a tomato
something like that so try to be
pre-emptive
try to be proactive well another thing
of being healthy and live long is to
find the right balance between active
and passive mode in your life so this
mice experiments means with mice have
shown that those who are too bored and
all the time in the dark and those who
have too much stress they die earlier
than those mice that have a certain
amount of stress and a certain amount of
relaxation so it’s scientifically proven
let’s say that we need a balance we
cannot all the time walk on our toes not
all the time be stressed in medical
science we call this these two modes
fight and flight and digest and rest and
of course when you rest and you digest
it’s not only that I speak about
digestion of food it’s also digestion of
emotions negative emotions positive
emotions you really need time to reflect
on them sorry that this one looks like
grizzly little bit I didn’t want to so
yeah of course you have to find a
balance between your day and your night
don’t forget the golden rule that all
the hours and minutes before midnight
you can count them double that’s an
important rule those that period is more
important for your body then later at
night apparently and my secret is I try
to catch a plane I say at 11 p.m. my
plane is going if I’m not in bed by 11
I have a problem the next day I know
that I’ll be tired the day will not be
the way I want so try try to make it a
plane to catch a train to catch before
you are in bed and then you can really
be in fight and flight mode until you
have done your things and you can go to
sleep so now the balance between content
and form for some between quality and
quantity this was the hardest balance
for me to discover when I was first lady
because you’re expected to do something
the content but you have to think about
how you will do it the form so this is
just a dinner a charity dinner for
breast cancer and I’m sitting in the
middle near the flowers and I have all
these guests
it was a gala dinner and I had to divide
my attention among all the guests of
course but that was difficult so what I
did I talked to one person at every
table and I said after the next course
after the soup
I will come sit in your place after the
salad I’ll come sit in your place and
before the dessert and for the coffee so
I really made the round of all the
tables talk to all the people and
they’ve felt much more engaged much more
respected balance is all about respect
when you have interviews or you prepare
for a presentation or for a meeting you
know what you’re going to talk about you
have your key messages so you have your
negotiation whatever you know some
things you want to obtain but you can
also prepare very well for the forum for
example if you have an interview you can
ask before will I be sitting or standing
is it a high table or low table will it
be will there be a question-and-answer
session yes or no will I have a glass of
water by my side things like that it’s
important what can I dress what are you
dressing how does the what does the
decor look like so it’s all important to
prepare such important meetings
beforehand because the forum is what
people remember so when you have
important meetings interviews
presentations don’t focus only on the
content but think also about the how the
quality the surrounding the context
because that’s what people usually
remember oh this is a blurred picture oh
it is big so the balance between content
and form also when you walk on the
street and you’re being recognized many
people are famous in this room or will
be famous one day and when you meet
people for you it’s a regular walk on
the street but for those people it’s
that day that’s
all day that they met you so if you are
aware of that you’re much more open your
you smile you don’t say no if they want
to take a photograph but you have to be
effective efficient because you don’t
have much time
so you had identify the photographer you
say okay you’re going to make a picture
okay let’s make a group picture smile
thank you bye bye so try to be nice but
efficient balance between past and
future when you are in a hectic life as
I was when I was first lady you think on
only now is all that matters right so
you kind of lose track of the big
picture and that’s dangerous because you
need to reflect on the past you need
your experience to live the present you
also need to look to the future to see
what will I be doing in five years in
ten years so you know like an experiment
things like that so in a timeless plane
because sometimes you travel and you
arrive at the same time as when you are
when you’re left this is the ideal way
of finding a balance between the past
and the future and the same is balance
between the ego and the outer you need
time for yourself you need to work on
yourself it’s a work in progress of
course you have to find time for your
for the others maybe to give them advice
or to help them and also they can help
you to reflect on your own life so try
also to find the balance between others
and yourself now this is the the last
balance I want to share with you of
course you have a balance between family
and friends like dividing your attention
between them but also within the family
when I thought I knew it all after
almost 10 years of being first lady I
thought
I know what what’s about balance done
suddenly my mother became ill with
Alzheimer disease and I found myself
reading books traveling to the
Netherlands very often to help my father
caring for her to spend quality time
with her and I suddenly looked in the
mirror somehow and I thought well I’ve
been maybe too much involved with my
kids have I neglected my parents so my
would advise to all of you don’t let it
come that far
and give to the younger and to the elder
generation your attention it’s so
important because one day you will be in
that third chair you will be the
grandparent and you will want your kids
to take care of you as you did that’s
all I wanted to say be aware be
conscious about the balances the harmony
in your own life I’ve give you some
hints some examples if you feel
something’s not comfortable you don’t
you feel something’s wrong you’re angry
irritated depressed maybe all the time
joyful that’s not good either
stop think about the balances in your
life and then refined that balance
because that is really what will improve
your lives and the lives of the others
are around you thank you very much
you
people ask me very often how come in
this craziness how can you stay so calm
craziness I mean all the family our
family members scattered around the
world and crazy political life here and
my answer well in fact it’s not easy it
has not been easy and it was a learning
process to keep the calmness somehow it
was a process of of months and months
and finally the secret of my calmness is
in the rabbits on my fridge this is my
fridge and these are little rabbits from
a Dutch children’s book this rabbit is
called nan Chu in Dutch in English is
translated as Miffy so for me Miffy is
represents balance for me Miffy a
balance is is a Dutch value and probably
all the activities that may feed us I
also want to do them during the day so
I’m trying to do all the activities you
see culture caring for others family
reading personal care and so on I try to
do other things and in the end to have
all my miffy’s on the right so what do
you see here this is a spectrum of all
colors ranging from back black to white
do you see how many colors how many
shades of gray there are between black
and white
the balance is somewhere in the middle
the balance is
how you look at it of course yes and
look at the Dutch sky
it’s full of shades of grey and this is
also a theory that whatever you look at
in your own environment your landscape
it influences your own attitude it
influences your mentality so maybe it’s
because of all these colors of grey in
the Dutch sky that we try to find a
balance
we don’t think black and white we try to
find a compromise we try to see the
nuances and to find the middle way the
golden middle way and not to judge too
easily
so this looking for compromises this
looking for all the shades of grey
between black and white this is called
the polder model it’s called like that
in politics for example this is Georgia
full of extremes it’s either very hot or
it’s very cold you have either high
peaks or you have deep green valleys has
this anything to do with the way we look
at things the black and white spectrum
that I was talking about and maybe there
is a way without destroying the Caucasus
to find more balance in our daily lives
and with this little presentation thanks
to TEDx to policy I want to give it a
try and tell you about different kinds
of balanced physical social generational
nature is based on balanced nature is
balanced nature takes care if of course
humankind
doesn’t interfere so also the human body
is of course a part of nature and there
is a balance in our bodies called the
acid-base balance of the ph value and if
we don’t take good care of our bodies
our body will protest so let’s talk
about food
the food intake is very important to
keep a balance in our bodies we need
from every group something every day at
every meal if we can cereals meat and
dairy and the biggest group is fruits
and vegetables we should eat much more
of those and so when I was a public
figure and I thought how can I survive
in all this working lunches dinners
receptions I cannot eat all the time and
still you know be nice to people and
then all the time refuse you can’t do
that
so I had to make choices to survive and
one of my tactics was when you’re
sitting at a state dinner for example to
call the waiter and to make him somehow
your friend and to ask okay can you
please skip the soup for me and can you
not put any sauce on my dressing and
maybe you will give me extra water
things like that so I always try to
manipulate somehow not to eat much this
is a way so as a believer in balance you
have to really try to think through the
meals the moments of meal in your day so
when you go out in the morning where
will will I have lunch where will I have
dinner am I going to travel then I
should take something let that something
be a banana or a carrot or a tomato
something like that so try to be
pre-emptive
try to be proactive well another thing
of being healthy and live long is to
find the right balance between active
and passive mode in your life so this
mice experiments means with mice have
shown that those who are too bored and
all the time in the dark and those who
have too much stress they die earlier
than those mice that have a certain
amount of stress and a certain amount of
relaxation so it’s scientifically proven
let’s say that we need a balance we
cannot all the time walk on our toes not
all the time be stressed in medical
science we call this these two modes
fight and flight and digest and rest and
of course when you rest and you digest
it’s not only that I speak about
digestion of food it’s also digestion of
emotions negative emotions positive
emotions you really need time to reflect
on them sorry that this one looks like
grizzly little bit I didn’t want to so
yeah of course you have to find a
balance between your day and your night
don’t forget the golden rule that all
the hours and minutes before midnight
you can count them double that’s an
important rule those that period is more
important for your body then later at
night apparently and my secret is I try
to catch a plane I say at 11 p.m. my
plane is going if I’m not in bed by 11
I have a problem the next day I know
that I’ll be tired the day will not be
the way I want so try try to make it a
plane to catch a train to catch before
you are in bed and then you can really
be in fight and flight mode until you
have done your things and you can go to
sleep so now the balance between content
and form for some between quality and
quantity this was the hardest balance
for me to discover when I was first lady
because you’re expected to do something
the content but you have to think about
how you will do it the form so this is
just a dinner a charity dinner for
breast cancer and I’m sitting in the
middle near the flowers and I have all
these guests
it was a gala dinner and I had to divide
my attention among all the guests of
course but that was difficult so what I
did I talked to one person at every
table and I said after the next course
after the soup
I will come sit in your place after the
salad I’ll come sit in your place and
before the dessert and for the coffee so
I really made the round of all the
tables talk to all the people and
they’ve felt much more engaged much more
respected balance is all about respect
when you have interviews or you prepare
for a presentation or for a meeting you
know what you’re going to talk about you
have your key messages so you have your
negotiation whatever you know some
things you want to obtain but you can
also prepare very well for the forum for
example if you have an interview you can
ask before will I be sitting or standing
is it a high table or low table will it
be will there be a question-and-answer
session yes or no will I have a glass of
water by my side things like that it’s
important what can I dress what are you
dressing how does the what does the
decor look like so it’s all important to
prepare such important meetings
beforehand because the forum is what
people remember so when you have
important meetings interviews
presentations don’t focus only on the
content but think also about the how the
quality the surrounding the context
because that’s what people usually
remember oh this is a blurred picture oh
it is big so the balance between content
and form also when you walk on the
street and you’re being recognized many
people are famous in this room or will
be famous one day and when you meet
people for you it’s a regular walk on
the street but for those people it’s
that day that’s
all day that they met you so if you are
aware of that you’re much more open your
you smile you don’t say no if they want
to take a photograph but you have to be
effective efficient because you don’t
have much time
so you had identify the photographer you
say okay you’re going to make a picture
okay let’s make a group picture smile
thank you bye bye so try to be nice but
efficient balance between past and
future when you are in a hectic life as
I was when I was first lady you think on
only now is all that matters right so
you kind of lose track of the big
picture and that’s dangerous because you
need to reflect on the past you need
your experience to live the present you
also need to look to the future to see
what will I be doing in five years in
ten years so you know like an experiment
things like that so in a timeless plane
because sometimes you travel and you
arrive at the same time as when you are
when you’re left this is the ideal way
of finding a balance between the past
and the future and the same is balance
between the ego and the outer you need
time for yourself you need to work on
yourself it’s a work in progress of
course you have to find time for your
for the others maybe to give them advice
or to help them and also they can help
you to reflect on your own life so try
also to find the balance between others
and yourself now this is the the last
balance I want to share with you of
course you have a balance between family
and friends like dividing your attention
between them but also within the family
when I thought I knew it all after
almost 10 years of being first lady I
thought
I know what what’s about balance done
suddenly my mother became ill with
Alzheimer disease and I found myself
reading books traveling to the
Netherlands very often to help my father
caring for her to spend quality time
with her and I suddenly looked in the
mirror somehow and I thought well I’ve
been maybe too much involved with my
kids have I neglected my parents so my
would advise to all of you don’t let it
come that far
and give to the younger and to the elder
generation your attention it’s so
important because one day you will be in
that third chair you will be the
grandparent and you will want your kids
to take care of you as you did that’s
all I wanted to say be aware be
conscious about the balances the harmony
in your own life I’ve give you some
hints some examples if you feel
something’s not comfortable you don’t
you feel something’s wrong you’re angry
irritated depressed maybe all the time
joyful that’s not good either
stop think about the balances in your
life and then refined that balance
because that is really what will improve
your lives and the lives of the others
are around you thank you very much
you
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