I vividly remember the first time I ever
presented in front of audiences just
like this and it was my first semester
in university and I was ill then the
only experience that I had of public
speaking or appearing public is from
watching my teachers giving the talk
soon morning assemblies I wasn’t offered
an opportunity to present in public up
until I was 20 years old and while
growing up I was a very active
participant in sports as well as social
activities I didn’t have much difficulty
interacting with others and I was
thinking to myself no big deal right
I just prepare the points beforehand and
I can just present it upon others just
like how old talk to my friends sounds
easy but it doesn t very difficult so as
soon as I walked up in front of the
classroom my body began to travel and as
I struggle for what words to say I began
to stutter so much I felt a sense of
anxiety overwhelming my body and there
were long uncomfortable moments of
silence and with each passing moment his
voice in my head grew louder and louder
that I’m making a fool of myself or
others would make fun of me and
eventually became a mess we evaluate
track in terms of its potential for
failure and this activates cognitive
schemas or beliefs associated with
feeling joy failing and interesting to
note that his fear of failing comes from
comes from a real case scenario and this
fear of failure comes from an irrational
and accurate estimation of reality and
comes from this belief as opposed to
what is actually going to happen what
this means is that before even taking
action this thought in my mind has
already arise that I will fail and what
is scenario will happen so in my
clinical practice my clients are trained
and if other cognitive skills in order
to be very events around them as
realistically and rationally and
objectively as possible somehow in our
human nature we have this tendency to
emphasize negative consequences and
failures as opposed to successes and
this in turn magnifies this thought
process the fear of the failure is
Limina that the worst case scenario will
happen it is well-established in
psychological literature that one way to
manage and overcome this fear of failure
is by taking action and noticing the
evidence that follows it comes in many
different terms community restructuring
creative exposure treatable activation
but it essentially provides the same
account in that it develops a healthy
sense of self-esteem in managing our
doubts and fears as well as develop a
realistic idea of our own sense of
competence I do not take that experience
in University
a form of weakness and instead to get up
and challenge before every presentation
including this one I prepare one before
him
I mean prepare two cups in case I forget
the points I even challenge this anxiety
one step further by approaching
strangers at my university at us
whenever help by asking for the time
something very simple
I defy him approach strangers picking up
a notch by introducing my game that’s
what getting does and eventually what my
way up was initially conversations as
well what I realize is that the more
that I did this the worst case scenario
doesn’t really happen and in the off
chance that he actually does happen it
turns out to be not really bad after all
and I’ve had my fair share of public
speaking or presenting in one of my
audience ever since the paralyzing
speech in university and one thing that
come to accept is that this anxiety and
this feeling doesn’t really change
I always feel this trembling before
coming up to an audience I always feel
this scrambling for words to say I feel
and cash of blood up to my head and I
feel that anxiety but what has changed
though is the belief in managing the
situation better compared to before and
there really isn’t any wisdom or any
talent related to doing this it just
comes from repeating the same behavior
over and over and over again and your
life you might have seen someone doing
something that you always want to do it
can be anything
skip body drawing anything and you are
thinking to yourself I can’t do it or
it’s beyond my abilities or this person
has a special talent this person has
been in the same position as you and the
only difference is that this
started doing it and currently has more
experience let’s take a moment to
consider the shared experience that we
all have and that is the experience
growing up as a child and as a child we
didn’t automatically know how to walk we
started first with crawling and true
repeat the trial and error eventually
develop the skill to walk and this goes
the same with any other skills that we
develop while growing up as well it can
be talking it can be riding a bike it
can be singing the same principle
applies in that trying and trying again
and failing is embedded within us
obsessed of acquiring a new skill but
what our development will be an adult
somehow we will be more conditioned in
order to avoid this failing and avoid is
trying from taking on its own natural
course so what important factor in a
child’s life and development comes from
having a secure relationship with an
attachment figure and this primarily is
the father or the mother in
Psychological terms called the secure
base a secure base offers the child is
trusting relationship with this figure
and allows him or her to be confident in
securing the world so imagine his child
crawling in the room and then he
attempts to stand up and take the first
few steps and then he falls over he
looks through the attachment figure and
sees that ok this person is still here
is alright and then he tries again so in
that sense this child develop the
confidence in order to walk confidence
in order to speak those first few words
and develop further skills
he or she grew up his other life the
question is is a secure base necessary
in an adult’s life such as you and me
and the answer is yes in overcoming and
taking action towards what we are
fearful of what can be very helpful is
to have a positive relationship with
someone who has gone through a similar
concern this gives us the calm and
assure instead someone else has already
done it so it can’t be that bad
or that I’m not alone in this and this
in water will then come in the form of
the business mentor coach college senior
lecturer it can anyone really someone
will be able to offer a listing here and
most importantly for us to develop a
trusting relationship with ourselves in
knowing that taking action despite
Jack Canfield the co-author of chicken
soup also mentioned that whatever and
everything that one lives on the other
side of fear
in conclusion taking repeated positive
action while having a point of reference
in somebody else allows us to be
empowered over our fears as opposed to
live within the rules created by them so
what are you waiting for
it’s time for us to start doing
something thank you [Applause]
presented in front of audiences just
like this and it was my first semester
in university and I was ill then the
only experience that I had of public
speaking or appearing public is from
watching my teachers giving the talk
soon morning assemblies I wasn’t offered
an opportunity to present in public up
until I was 20 years old and while
growing up I was a very active
participant in sports as well as social
activities I didn’t have much difficulty
interacting with others and I was
thinking to myself no big deal right
I just prepare the points beforehand and
I can just present it upon others just
like how old talk to my friends sounds
easy but it doesn t very difficult so as
soon as I walked up in front of the
classroom my body began to travel and as
I struggle for what words to say I began
to stutter so much I felt a sense of
anxiety overwhelming my body and there
were long uncomfortable moments of
silence and with each passing moment his
voice in my head grew louder and louder
that I’m making a fool of myself or
others would make fun of me and
eventually became a mess we evaluate
track in terms of its potential for
failure and this activates cognitive
schemas or beliefs associated with
feeling joy failing and interesting to
note that his fear of failing comes from
comes from a real case scenario and this
fear of failure comes from an irrational
and accurate estimation of reality and
comes from this belief as opposed to
what is actually going to happen what
this means is that before even taking
action this thought in my mind has
already arise that I will fail and what
is scenario will happen so in my
clinical practice my clients are trained
and if other cognitive skills in order
to be very events around them as
realistically and rationally and
objectively as possible somehow in our
human nature we have this tendency to
emphasize negative consequences and
failures as opposed to successes and
this in turn magnifies this thought
process the fear of the failure is
Limina that the worst case scenario will
happen it is well-established in
psychological literature that one way to
manage and overcome this fear of failure
is by taking action and noticing the
evidence that follows it comes in many
different terms community restructuring
creative exposure treatable activation
but it essentially provides the same
account in that it develops a healthy
sense of self-esteem in managing our
doubts and fears as well as develop a
realistic idea of our own sense of
competence I do not take that experience
in University
a form of weakness and instead to get up
and challenge before every presentation
including this one I prepare one before
him
I mean prepare two cups in case I forget
the points I even challenge this anxiety
one step further by approaching
strangers at my university at us
whenever help by asking for the time
something very simple
I defy him approach strangers picking up
a notch by introducing my game that’s
what getting does and eventually what my
way up was initially conversations as
well what I realize is that the more
that I did this the worst case scenario
doesn’t really happen and in the off
chance that he actually does happen it
turns out to be not really bad after all
and I’ve had my fair share of public
speaking or presenting in one of my
audience ever since the paralyzing
speech in university and one thing that
come to accept is that this anxiety and
this feeling doesn’t really change
I always feel this trembling before
coming up to an audience I always feel
this scrambling for words to say I feel
and cash of blood up to my head and I
feel that anxiety but what has changed
though is the belief in managing the
situation better compared to before and
there really isn’t any wisdom or any
talent related to doing this it just
comes from repeating the same behavior
over and over and over again and your
life you might have seen someone doing
something that you always want to do it
can be anything
skip body drawing anything and you are
thinking to yourself I can’t do it or
it’s beyond my abilities or this person
has a special talent this person has
been in the same position as you and the
only difference is that this
started doing it and currently has more
experience let’s take a moment to
consider the shared experience that we
all have and that is the experience
growing up as a child and as a child we
didn’t automatically know how to walk we
started first with crawling and true
repeat the trial and error eventually
develop the skill to walk and this goes
the same with any other skills that we
develop while growing up as well it can
be talking it can be riding a bike it
can be singing the same principle
applies in that trying and trying again
and failing is embedded within us
obsessed of acquiring a new skill but
what our development will be an adult
somehow we will be more conditioned in
order to avoid this failing and avoid is
trying from taking on its own natural
course so what important factor in a
child’s life and development comes from
having a secure relationship with an
attachment figure and this primarily is
the father or the mother in
Psychological terms called the secure
base a secure base offers the child is
trusting relationship with this figure
and allows him or her to be confident in
securing the world so imagine his child
crawling in the room and then he
attempts to stand up and take the first
few steps and then he falls over he
looks through the attachment figure and
sees that ok this person is still here
is alright and then he tries again so in
that sense this child develop the
confidence in order to walk confidence
in order to speak those first few words
and develop further skills
he or she grew up his other life the
question is is a secure base necessary
in an adult’s life such as you and me
and the answer is yes in overcoming and
taking action towards what we are
fearful of what can be very helpful is
to have a positive relationship with
someone who has gone through a similar
concern this gives us the calm and
assure instead someone else has already
done it so it can’t be that bad
or that I’m not alone in this and this
in water will then come in the form of
the business mentor coach college senior
lecturer it can anyone really someone
will be able to offer a listing here and
most importantly for us to develop a
trusting relationship with ourselves in
knowing that taking action despite
Jack Canfield the co-author of chicken
soup also mentioned that whatever and
everything that one lives on the other
side of fear
in conclusion taking repeated positive
action while having a point of reference
in somebody else allows us to be
empowered over our fears as opposed to
live within the rules created by them so
what are you waiting for
it’s time for us to start doing
something thank you [Applause]
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