
so how many of you have ever had the
unfortunate privilege of witnessing the
toddler tantrum it’s terrible right
the crying the screaming the parents
like myself trying to use logic and
reason with three-year-olds well this is
exactly where I found myself on a Sunday
morning
this past summer only the kicker was I
was at church now my family goes to
church regularly but for some reason on
this particular Sunday my three-year-old
daughter
juniper Ruth decided that it was a grave
injustice that there weren’t more snacks
and snack breaks at church and so my
husband Travis and I we were trying to
handle this situation which basically
means it was going terribly and so I did
the only thing I could think of to do
which is I scooped juniper onto my lap I
held her really tight closed my eyes and
I took a deep breath and I did the
internal mother scream for help and when
I opened my eyes I was shocked to
realize that help had arrived
unfortunately though that help had
arrived in the form of a bear a big
beautiful black bear was walking
straight towards my family and I in the
now there might be some confusion at
this point because what did you picture
when I said my family went to church a
building some pews it’s not exactly bear
country right but what I mean
when I say my family goes to church is
that we go out into nature and we talk
about spirituality we’ve come to call
this do-it-yourself church and we’ve
been doing it for four years and it has
changed our lives now Travis and I
stumbled into this practice when I was
pregnant he asked me do you think that
we’ll join a church once we’re parents
and we talked about it and as we did we
were really sure we wanted spirituality
in our family life and we were also
really sure that we did not feel like we
fit in any of the regular churches and
we kind of didn’t know what to do
and perhaps you have had this same
question or dilemma at some point in
your life and then a couple of weeks
later we were out for a hike and we
picked back up the conversation only
this time we asked some other questions
and these were why can’t being outside
which we both love so much be our church
and why can’t we be as committed to it
as other people are – inside church and
of course the answer to these questions
is that we could and so that’s exactly
what we did now I think one of the
reasons this practice has stuck for my
family is that it’s simple I’m the
mother of a small child it has to be
simple so first pick a day and time and
commit to the practice and keep that
commitment to go out into nature and
spend
I’m being with nature turn off your
devices 3 pick a spiritual theme or
reading maybe a piece of poetry and
bring it with you and while you’re
outside reflect on it talk about it and
if you can take a piece of it and post
it in your house somewhere so that
during the week you see it and that’s it
three simple steps but in addition to
the simplicity I think DIY church has
also stuck for us because it’s profound
it has an impact as an example a couple
of weeks ago I had had a really long
week and when I woke up Sunday morning I
was tired and I was cranky and the last
thing that I felt like doing was
spending a whole morning with my family
in a location that would not provide
adequate coffee but because of the
commitment we went and we drove up into
the mountains and then when we got there
Travis and I proceeded to have our
favorite fight which is are we gonna
take this beautifully established trail
or are we gonna bushwhack either up or
down the side of a mountain and I’m sure
you’re really clear from my tone where I
fall on this but I love trails my
husband hates them and on this
particular Sunday
I lost the argument and so I found
myself slipping and sliding down this
mountain slope but as I was doing it I
noticed that I was changing because the
act of getting down that mountain slope
became a form of meditation and I
stopped holding so tightly
my anger and my tiredness and then I
looked up and my heart was just filled
with ah and joy because I saw my brave
juniper Ruth making her way down this
same slope and at the same time she was
singing a song about sharks and cupcakes
and sticks and it sounds like a terrible
song but she had managed to craft it
into a ridiculous and beautiful hymn you
know at least to my mama tears and we
all made it safely down and when we got
there we found this beautiful little
creek that we had been looking for and
we took out a book that we had been
reading about compassion and we read and
we talked about compassion and then
because we have a three-year-old we
talked about whether sharks have the
capacity for compassion we’re still
unclear about that but you know I was
not the same woman I had been when I had
woken up as I was by the end of that day
and to me this is why DIY church is so
profound because it encourages you to
notice and it invites you to change and
after a couple of years I noticed that
my family was changing in some pretty
significant ways we were all vastly less
stressed and our schedules were less
hectic and our health had improved we
were cooking and eating at home most
nights and Travis and I managed to
tackle some pretty big health habit
changes that we had been unable to do
for years
now it was these health habit changes
that really got me wondering because in
addition to being a mom and a wife and a
lover of trails I am also a graduate
student in public health and I’m
passionate about data and research and
so I started to wonder what does the
research stay about spirituality and
health and nature and so I looked into
this research and I want to share just
two things that I learned that really
impacted me on a personal level
so first spirituality is like this
amazing buffer so when life gets hard as
it does for each and every one of us
spirituality can help keep us from
running over that cliff into addictions
and depression in short it makes us more
resilient second our bodies they love
nature turns out there’s now a number of
research studies that show that when we
spend more time in nature markers of
health that researchers look at things
like blood pressure cholesterol mental
health these in proof and even our
capacity for empathy now I’ll be honest
and say that I would have kept doing DIY
church even if I’d found nothing in the
research to support it but the fact that
I did has definitely made me more
committed to the practice and is really
what encouraged me to want to share what
is a personal family practice with all
of you because I really do believe that
everyone you can craft a meaningful DIY
Church practice and I believe that doing
so will improve your health I also
believe that if you’re already the
member of a church or another faith
community and you love that this
practice still has merit take something
that you hear in church out for a hike
or a walk and see how nature changes you
but I want to make sure that I answer
the most important question which of
course is what about the bear in the
middle of church well it turns out bears
are no match for the toddler tantrum
that bear assessed the situation
heard the crying and the screaming spun
right around ran up the hill as fast as
it could and juniper Ruth who I was
hoping would have this on spired nature
moment at seeing her first bear turned
to me and said and I quote mama I don’t
care about bears right now I want my
and I know this sounds like a total
church failure this whole scene but to
me it’s the perfect example of why DIY
church is so amazing because in that
moment my humanity around things like
dealing with a toddler tantrum were
pressed right up against my spiritual
ideals around patience and love and then
a bear entered the mix and I had to just
throw up my hands and laugh and try to
learn that lesson yet again that grace
comes in many forms and most often not
the form I want DIY church is a simple
and profound practice I invite each and
every one of you to try it but please please bring enough snacks thank you