I feel so fortunate to be here you guys
I should let you know I’m not an
academic hell I barely have a university
diploma but I have found myself in a
very fortunate seat
I am the showrunner of my own series
showrunner is industry talk for a boss
lady hence the Blazer and he’s even if
as I say it to you it feels strange
because it wasn’t so long ago for years
now that I felt completely powerless and
unqualified and specifically like I
didn’t have a choice have you ever felt
a tingle inside that you were meant for
more that something outside of your
prescribed life was calling to you but
you didn’t feel entitled to it if so
don’t sweat I want to talk to you about
the choice you have to grow outside of
your comfort zone see I spent the
majority of my adult life feeling like I
had no choice I lived in a constant
state of rejection I’m an actor I spent
my career going into rooms desperately
trying to convince someone that I was
the perfect version of that character
only to be told no I’m sure you’re all
thinking that acting is a very glamorous
career and the irony is the majority of
creative types work a very small
percentage of the time if at all so I
got fed up I mean look if I was trying
to sell you this jumper and you said no
I could blame the jumper but when the
product is yourself it becomes harder
and harder to sleep at night as
passionate as I was about acting I was
so sick of feeling like I didn’t have a
say in my own career so I did something
that felt a little bit illegal I started
writing not very well and it felt like I
don’t know it felt like writing was
meant for someone smarter than me or
more
Sheldon me but I’d get these ideas one
in particular little morsel I had an
idea for a medical dramedy that took
place in a pediatric Children’s Hospital
I know hilarious and instead of giving
it time to develop past its infancy
stage I pitched it to an industry
veteran and this guy smart hell of a
resume I really trust him he’s also a
very good father
for those of you who know my dad Ivan
Reitman you know he’s considered one of
the forefathers of comedy he’s the dude
who made ghostbusters yes and he’s also
here today happy birthday dad
and I am so sorry for the story I’m
about to tell you see if you know my dad
at all he is beyond blunt yeah I’ll
never forget his face he looked at me
right in the eyes it’s a Catherine a
medical drama d leave that to Aaron
Sorkin those words on a loop reverberate
it through my brain for weeks leave that
to Aaron leave that to Aaron leave that
to Aaron Sorkin Oh every time I went to
brush my teeth leave that to harrass
Orca tried to parallel park my car leave
that to Aaron Sorkin everything should
be left Aaron Sorkin who of course is
responsible for writing the newsroom and
the West Wing and more notably won an
Oscar for the social network smart guy
but yeah that’s shut me down I released
the idea back into the wild and felt
shamed for even stepping outside of my
comfort zone now if that moment is
something you can relate to or you
suppress your magic and you devalued
yourself I’ve got awesome news that is
an absolutely required moment in
identifying the choice I keep harping on
about the choice because I find it very
important to notice that there is one I
find that empowering but before we take
that step let’s just for a second
examine what happens if you say no to
the choice because we do it all the time
right you don’t have to say yes you can
ignore your inner voice and listen to
that more critical voice that’s always
running right you’re not smart enough
you’re not special enough remember that
teacher who didn’t think much of you
that ex-boyfriend who thought you were a
hack he wasn’t always wrong and what if
you fail what would that feel like would
it be that different than your current
state of creative passivity for me those
two states were the same the idea of
writing something and it not going
anywhere failing and not writing because
I was too afraid of failing was about
equal
if you do feel can you survive it I
think you can doctor someone on their
deathbed in 2011 Bharani we’re published
a book about her time as a palliative
care nurse she documented the five
biggest regrets of people on their
deathbed the number one regret of people
about to pass away I wish I’d had the
courage to live a life more true to
myself and didn’t worry so much about
what others expected of me so look it
can unpack that and a bunch of different
ways but for me the takeaway is that it
is our duty to listen to our inner voice
in order to be our truest self so let’s
take a step to the edge for a second
let’s just consider the uncomfortable
now look my aaron sorkin idea dad wasn’t
very it but aaron sorkin didn’t become
aaron sorkin by allowing anyone who did
something before him halt his
development right granted he’s a white
male and that gave him opportunity you
bet and that’s not just my opinion
that’s a statistical fact as a female
showrunner I frequently find myself in
these conversations talking about how
kalki roles in the entertainment
industry aren’t going to women it’s why
I make a practice of hiring
predominantly women even if their
resumes don’t support it yet but guys
Aaron Sorkin is not the problem he’s
merely the incumbent he is currently
holding office which means you get to be
the Challenger and yes your path into
the arena must be a challenge and in
order to do that you got to enter the
arena that’s where the choice comes into
play my path as the Challenger started
after I gave birth to my first son
Jackson I went back to work too early I
say that because I had postpartum
depression and a few years ago no one
was really talking about postpartum
depression because a lot of people
associated it with the stigma that you
were broken well I was not broken but I
was experiencing a hormonal imbalance I
felt
I was having an identity crisis I didn’t
feel like myself when I was with my son
I didn’t feel like myself when I was at
work which made my first job back
shooting an independent film in
Philadelphia heart you see it also
happened to fall on my first Mother’s
Day I was away from my six week old son
surrounded by male comedians and they
start giving me hell right they’re
teasing me saying that they’ll send my
son a Mother’s Day card on my behalf
would it be more intimate if they signed
it from the nanny was my son calling
with my son calling the nanny mom yet as
you can guess I cried I broke down right
there
I still remember their faces you know it
was so awkward and painful and silent
but there was also something really
funny about it but I didn’t I didn’t
know it in the moment I went back to my
hotel room and I called my husband who’s
also my producing partner smart guy and
he said you got to write this down we
watched TV all the time when’s the last
time you saw this story it can’t be the
only one experiencing this dare it was
right the choice and this time god damn
it I said yes I wrote it it stumbled out
of me it was awkward and not perfect and
for those of you who are familiar with
my series working moms you know that it
is the finale of the pilot episode
followed by my character personifying
that moment by battle crying at a 900
pound grizzly bear if in this moment
you’re flirting with the idea of saying
yes to the choice I got two things for
you one it’s a lot of work I don’t want
to downplay that you’re gonna work too
that work has to be specific
pick to you you must cut your voice so
sharply that it can be mistaken for
nobody but you working moms was that for
me I felt confident writing about what
it was to be a working mother because I
know how hard it is I know how
humiliating it is I also know how
luxurious it is I get to leave my kid
kids now and do something that’s just
for me if you are considering saying yes
to the choice I don’t to burst your
bubble but others will too you’re not
the only one who’s gonna take a whack at
it when I first sold my series it was
actually to a u.s. network and because
my resume had nothing on it they
attached another showrunner and this guy
who by the way is still a friend of mine
really funny guy his number one job was
to make sure that my show work and moms
was as relatable to as many people as
possible and in what world was a mother
battle crying at a bear relatable was my
show targeting Mountaineer women there
was again that choice I could stick to
my guns and be deemed difficult or I
could trust his experience I turned in
the pilot to the network without the
bear scene and a few other scenes that
maybe weren’t so obviously funny the
network past turns out they had another
working mother show in development that
was very specific very good and also
produced by louis c.k ironically the
incumbent or Aaron Sorkin of my actual
genre that lesson was a hard one but an
important one you see if you’re gonna be
brave enough to say yes to the choice
you must also have the courage to stick
to your vision because it will be tested
the silver lining is the rights reverted
back to me and after several more passes
my show happened across the desk of the
taste maker and serious risk-taker Sally
Cato at the CBC
she greenlit the pilot to series I
remember sitting down with her the first
time because she commented on how the
show’s specificity was so relatable to
her so perhaps being specific is
actually very relatable look you might
watch this and still not be ready to say
yes to the choice that is a very worthy
part of the journey only you know when
it’s time to enter the arena
I just finished saying yes to my second
season of the show and I’m about to
start this process with a whole new show
that is completely outside of my comfort
zone dare I say it’s outside of Aaron
Sorkin’s – who for the record is a
genius I’m doing just fine guys whatever
voice you’ve been gifted with and it is
a gift I’m here not to encourage but to
demand that you at least consider it
because why not you baby enter the arena
thank you
[Applause]
I should let you know I’m not an
academic hell I barely have a university
diploma but I have found myself in a
very fortunate seat
I am the showrunner of my own series
showrunner is industry talk for a boss
lady hence the Blazer and he’s even if
as I say it to you it feels strange
because it wasn’t so long ago for years
now that I felt completely powerless and
unqualified and specifically like I
didn’t have a choice have you ever felt
a tingle inside that you were meant for
more that something outside of your
prescribed life was calling to you but
you didn’t feel entitled to it if so
don’t sweat I want to talk to you about
the choice you have to grow outside of
your comfort zone see I spent the
majority of my adult life feeling like I
had no choice I lived in a constant
state of rejection I’m an actor I spent
my career going into rooms desperately
trying to convince someone that I was
the perfect version of that character
only to be told no I’m sure you’re all
thinking that acting is a very glamorous
career and the irony is the majority of
creative types work a very small
percentage of the time if at all so I
got fed up I mean look if I was trying
to sell you this jumper and you said no
I could blame the jumper but when the
product is yourself it becomes harder
and harder to sleep at night as
passionate as I was about acting I was
so sick of feeling like I didn’t have a
say in my own career so I did something
that felt a little bit illegal I started
writing not very well and it felt like I
don’t know it felt like writing was
meant for someone smarter than me or
more
Sheldon me but I’d get these ideas one
in particular little morsel I had an
idea for a medical dramedy that took
place in a pediatric Children’s Hospital
I know hilarious and instead of giving
it time to develop past its infancy
stage I pitched it to an industry
veteran and this guy smart hell of a
resume I really trust him he’s also a
very good father
for those of you who know my dad Ivan
Reitman you know he’s considered one of
the forefathers of comedy he’s the dude
who made ghostbusters yes and he’s also
here today happy birthday dad
and I am so sorry for the story I’m
about to tell you see if you know my dad
at all he is beyond blunt yeah I’ll
never forget his face he looked at me
right in the eyes it’s a Catherine a
medical drama d leave that to Aaron
Sorkin those words on a loop reverberate
it through my brain for weeks leave that
to Aaron leave that to Aaron leave that
to Aaron Sorkin Oh every time I went to
brush my teeth leave that to harrass
Orca tried to parallel park my car leave
that to Aaron Sorkin everything should
be left Aaron Sorkin who of course is
responsible for writing the newsroom and
the West Wing and more notably won an
Oscar for the social network smart guy
but yeah that’s shut me down I released
the idea back into the wild and felt
shamed for even stepping outside of my
comfort zone now if that moment is
something you can relate to or you
suppress your magic and you devalued
yourself I’ve got awesome news that is
an absolutely required moment in
identifying the choice I keep harping on
about the choice because I find it very
important to notice that there is one I
find that empowering but before we take
that step let’s just for a second
examine what happens if you say no to
the choice because we do it all the time
right you don’t have to say yes you can
ignore your inner voice and listen to
that more critical voice that’s always
running right you’re not smart enough
you’re not special enough remember that
teacher who didn’t think much of you
that ex-boyfriend who thought you were a
hack he wasn’t always wrong and what if
you fail what would that feel like would
it be that different than your current
state of creative passivity for me those
two states were the same the idea of
writing something and it not going
anywhere failing and not writing because
I was too afraid of failing was about
equal
if you do feel can you survive it I
think you can doctor someone on their
deathbed in 2011 Bharani we’re published
a book about her time as a palliative
care nurse she documented the five
biggest regrets of people on their
deathbed the number one regret of people
about to pass away I wish I’d had the
courage to live a life more true to
myself and didn’t worry so much about
what others expected of me so look it
can unpack that and a bunch of different
ways but for me the takeaway is that it
is our duty to listen to our inner voice
in order to be our truest self so let’s
take a step to the edge for a second
let’s just consider the uncomfortable
now look my aaron sorkin idea dad wasn’t
very it but aaron sorkin didn’t become
aaron sorkin by allowing anyone who did
something before him halt his
development right granted he’s a white
male and that gave him opportunity you
bet and that’s not just my opinion
that’s a statistical fact as a female
showrunner I frequently find myself in
these conversations talking about how
kalki roles in the entertainment
industry aren’t going to women it’s why
I make a practice of hiring
predominantly women even if their
resumes don’t support it yet but guys
Aaron Sorkin is not the problem he’s
merely the incumbent he is currently
holding office which means you get to be
the Challenger and yes your path into
the arena must be a challenge and in
order to do that you got to enter the
arena that’s where the choice comes into
play my path as the Challenger started
after I gave birth to my first son
Jackson I went back to work too early I
say that because I had postpartum
depression and a few years ago no one
was really talking about postpartum
depression because a lot of people
associated it with the stigma that you
were broken well I was not broken but I
was experiencing a hormonal imbalance I
felt
I was having an identity crisis I didn’t
feel like myself when I was with my son
I didn’t feel like myself when I was at
work which made my first job back
shooting an independent film in
Philadelphia heart you see it also
happened to fall on my first Mother’s
Day I was away from my six week old son
surrounded by male comedians and they
start giving me hell right they’re
teasing me saying that they’ll send my
son a Mother’s Day card on my behalf
would it be more intimate if they signed
it from the nanny was my son calling
with my son calling the nanny mom yet as
you can guess I cried I broke down right
there
I still remember their faces you know it
was so awkward and painful and silent
but there was also something really
funny about it but I didn’t I didn’t
know it in the moment I went back to my
hotel room and I called my husband who’s
also my producing partner smart guy and
he said you got to write this down we
watched TV all the time when’s the last
time you saw this story it can’t be the
only one experiencing this dare it was
right the choice and this time god damn
it I said yes I wrote it it stumbled out
of me it was awkward and not perfect and
for those of you who are familiar with
my series working moms you know that it
is the finale of the pilot episode
followed by my character personifying
that moment by battle crying at a 900
pound grizzly bear if in this moment
you’re flirting with the idea of saying
yes to the choice I got two things for
you one it’s a lot of work I don’t want
to downplay that you’re gonna work too
that work has to be specific
pick to you you must cut your voice so
sharply that it can be mistaken for
nobody but you working moms was that for
me I felt confident writing about what
it was to be a working mother because I
know how hard it is I know how
humiliating it is I also know how
luxurious it is I get to leave my kid
kids now and do something that’s just
for me if you are considering saying yes
to the choice I don’t to burst your
bubble but others will too you’re not
the only one who’s gonna take a whack at
it when I first sold my series it was
actually to a u.s. network and because
my resume had nothing on it they
attached another showrunner and this guy
who by the way is still a friend of mine
really funny guy his number one job was
to make sure that my show work and moms
was as relatable to as many people as
possible and in what world was a mother
battle crying at a bear relatable was my
show targeting Mountaineer women there
was again that choice I could stick to
my guns and be deemed difficult or I
could trust his experience I turned in
the pilot to the network without the
bear scene and a few other scenes that
maybe weren’t so obviously funny the
network past turns out they had another
working mother show in development that
was very specific very good and also
produced by louis c.k ironically the
incumbent or Aaron Sorkin of my actual
genre that lesson was a hard one but an
important one you see if you’re gonna be
brave enough to say yes to the choice
you must also have the courage to stick
to your vision because it will be tested
the silver lining is the rights reverted
back to me and after several more passes
my show happened across the desk of the
taste maker and serious risk-taker Sally
Cato at the CBC
she greenlit the pilot to series I
remember sitting down with her the first
time because she commented on how the
show’s specificity was so relatable to
her so perhaps being specific is
actually very relatable look you might
watch this and still not be ready to say
yes to the choice that is a very worthy
part of the journey only you know when
it’s time to enter the arena
I just finished saying yes to my second
season of the show and I’m about to
start this process with a whole new show
that is completely outside of my comfort
zone dare I say it’s outside of Aaron
Sorkin’s – who for the record is a
genius I’m doing just fine guys whatever
voice you’ve been gifted with and it is
a gift I’m here not to encourage but to
demand that you at least consider it
because why not you baby enter the arena
thank you
[Applause]
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