identity that’s all that we are I am a
woman I am a veteran I’m a queer person
I am a member of a military family and
the list goes on and on before I was the
person standing before you today I was
broken the person that you see today is
an able-bodied appearing moderately put
together version of myself it hasn’t
always looked this way identity has
always been important to me my identity
is a member of a military family led me
to join the Navy in 2008 it pushed me to
be the best sailor around to train
harder to excel in everything that I did
my identity as a queer person was one
that I put back in the closet to surf it
was a piece of me that I sacrificed to
be a part of the military it led me to a
life of isolation during service and
force every is more after service my
identity is an athlete was one that was
stripped from me after several failed
surgeries on my sternum I found my body
irreparable damaged this evolution shook
me to my core when I could no longer be
me or lived the life that I had imagined
I lost my identity my sense of purpose
and all of what I knew about myself in
2009 after two failed surgeries on my
chest I was living in the wooded warrior
barracks at the Naval Medical Center in
San Diego one night ever after a
particularly rough incident between
myself and the corpsman in charge of the
transition unit I found myself sitting
below my fifth floor window with it open
debating whether or not I was going to
jump from it in that moment I reflected
on my life I thought about who I was
what a mess I had become and I wondered
if I would ever be able to look in the
mirror and like the person that I was
one day when I’m gonna become or if this
was all I had in store for my future I
sat there and I cried and I cried and I
cried I cried for the loss of the life
that I had always known
I cried for the fear of what was to come
I cried for the intense and overwhelming
pain that had taken over my body and
consumed my mind and I wondered why I
should keep living I spent the last few
months reflecting on why I didn’t jump
that night and if I mean honest so
because I wasn’t sure what I was more
afraid of living or dying in that moment
I made a decision I decided to stand up
to leave my isolation and to go sit in
the emergency room waiting room you see
as a queer person serving under Don’t
Ask Don’t Tell I had learned that if I
kept my secrets to myself if I cut
myself isolated from my peers and from
those closest to me I was safer the
fewer people that knew my secrets the
safer I’m more protected I was but I
knew I wouldn’t survive the night if I
kept doing that and so I stood up and I
went to that waiting room and I sat
there until what felt like the early
hours in the morning I sat there until I
trusted myself to go back to my room and
get help fast forward to 2012 I had
survived that night but only barely
after another major surgery left me with
a 9 and a half inch metal rod in my
chest that held my insides together I
was being medically retired from the
military two years before I was set to
my contract was due to end and I found
myself with my car packed driving from
San Diego to Seattle when I returned
home I truly had no idea of who I was
well I felt an unending sense of
liberation I simultaneously felt a sense
of loneliness that I didn’t know how to
face what no one had warned me about
when I left those gates for the last
time was that I would feel like the
military’s cast away as soon as I got
home in place in the comfort and
familiarity of my military family was
only insecurity and doubt as to whether
didn’t know what to do
I had no idea what I was supposed to do
or what my sense of purpose was I lost
it but I got it back and then I looked
back and I never thought that I was a
part of a bigger picture what is the
bigger picture a lot of times the
biggest fault is that we isolate
ourselves we get caught up in our
isolation we feel that we’re alone and
we’re the only one experiencing that
deep dark paint we lack that community
we lack that sense of purpose
however as unique as the journey is to
the individual the shared experiences
are shared worldwide I too have a
similar story I have received a medical
discharge in 2005 and as excited as I
was I said yes I’m free I walked out
those gates with my DD 214 in hand
waving around like a crazy person I
might have blown it up a little bit and
put it on a nice little plaque I can’t
confirm that but something happened I
realized I didn’t have a purpose what
does that mean purposes is a huge part
for five years I served in the Army
right I didn’t have to have a purpose
because goddammit they give it to me
they told me you when to wake up they
told me when to go to bed do some
push-ups
eat your food I don’t have that anymore
the first five years of my adult life I
was told what to do now what so there I
went wandering wandering the earth
aimlessly with no purpose
taking dead-end jobs dead-end
relationships but fast-forward to 2015 I
got involved with a nonprofit called the
Mission Continues and with that
I found what my purpose was and it was
clear as day and that purpose got
stronger and stronger
over the years that purpose was serviced
it never changed my entire life at the
age of 17 I raised that right hand to
serve my country
because I wanted to be part of something
greater than myself and it took me a
long time ten years after I got the
military to realize that service has
just been something that I have always
wanted to do it is my passion to be
around like-minded people and everybody
likes to be around like-minded people
because it’s comfortable right we love
to be inspired and empowered by people
around us who have the same mission
vision and values as I do so there I was
serving with the Mission Continues
proudly and on my very first project
someone came up to me whom I did not
know he put his hand on my shoulder and
he said I need you to leave whoa
I just came here to to do some work guy
like let’s let’s back it down a bit he’s
like don’t worry I got you he gave me
the tools he gave me the instructions he
gave me the guidance he empowered me so
where do we go next right I’m beyond
survival at this point I’m thriving I
wanted more I know my Worth and I know
that I want more so what can I do a year
and a half later I took over that same
position he did as the first service
platoon leader in Tacoma and so with
that we serve in multiple communities
one of those communities is in the east
side of Tacoma where every month we
dedicate our time to a park and the east
side of Tacoma that is my community I
work with minority veterans as the
veterans of color program coordinator
focusing on equity and inclusion and
building a more inclusive environment
for minority veterans that is my
community I work with veterans of
everyone from everywhere because I love
veterans that is my passion so I’m gonna
do something really quickly and I
challenge you to take part in it this
right here we call this a nice hand
right I want you to take that hand make
it ever so strong point it in a general
direction of people and I want you to
say these three words are you ready I
want you to say you are dope go ahead
let me explain number one to be dope
number one to be dope you must be
determined with determination it implies
and you know that you have the knowledge
that it is not going to be easy people
will get in your way
but people will also vacuum that’s the
asset of a community number two it
requires you to be open handed now this
is a two-fold meaning number one
understand that an open hand has more
purpose and more uses than a closed fist
the open hand controls the fist and
anytime you could put it right back to
where it needs to be number two it also
means to be generous be generous with
your time be generous with the people
around you share your truth know your
Worth and if they don’t know their worth
give them those words it’s lovely I
promised to my wife I love you I needed
to be led and you pulled me while I
kicked and screamed to find my purpose
3b purpose-driven
understand that your purpose is
important and it goes back to knowing
your self work
you deserve the greatest of things that
you desire so go and seek them and keep
that purpose in your mind when you form
your vision and it will be ever so clear
lastly you’re empowering you understand
the importance of the position that you
are in and where you now stand I’ve
never thought in a million years that
I’ll be standing up here on this stage
talking to all you people looking good
right look good right
I wouldn’t have thought that I never
would have thought that I lacked that
self-confidence but people my wife my
friends my brothers and sisters they
empower me and that goes back to
generosity give it back I challenge you
to give it back whether it’s with words
or a hug you want a hug today I’ll form
a line I love hugs okay I do I’m a
hugger I am NOT a hand shaker I am a
hugger I’m a lover I am a fighter I will
fight for you day in and day out because
it is what you need it is what you
deserve you are determined you are open
handed you are purpose driven you are
empowering say it with me you are done
thank you [Applause]
woman I am a veteran I’m a queer person
I am a member of a military family and
the list goes on and on before I was the
person standing before you today I was
broken the person that you see today is
an able-bodied appearing moderately put
together version of myself it hasn’t
always looked this way identity has
always been important to me my identity
is a member of a military family led me
to join the Navy in 2008 it pushed me to
be the best sailor around to train
harder to excel in everything that I did
my identity as a queer person was one
that I put back in the closet to surf it
was a piece of me that I sacrificed to
be a part of the military it led me to a
life of isolation during service and
force every is more after service my
identity is an athlete was one that was
stripped from me after several failed
surgeries on my sternum I found my body
irreparable damaged this evolution shook
me to my core when I could no longer be
me or lived the life that I had imagined
I lost my identity my sense of purpose
and all of what I knew about myself in
2009 after two failed surgeries on my
chest I was living in the wooded warrior
barracks at the Naval Medical Center in
San Diego one night ever after a
particularly rough incident between
myself and the corpsman in charge of the
transition unit I found myself sitting
below my fifth floor window with it open
debating whether or not I was going to
jump from it in that moment I reflected
on my life I thought about who I was
what a mess I had become and I wondered
if I would ever be able to look in the
mirror and like the person that I was
one day when I’m gonna become or if this
was all I had in store for my future I
sat there and I cried and I cried and I
cried I cried for the loss of the life
that I had always known
I cried for the fear of what was to come
I cried for the intense and overwhelming
pain that had taken over my body and
consumed my mind and I wondered why I
should keep living I spent the last few
months reflecting on why I didn’t jump
that night and if I mean honest so
because I wasn’t sure what I was more
afraid of living or dying in that moment
I made a decision I decided to stand up
to leave my isolation and to go sit in
the emergency room waiting room you see
as a queer person serving under Don’t
Ask Don’t Tell I had learned that if I
kept my secrets to myself if I cut
myself isolated from my peers and from
those closest to me I was safer the
fewer people that knew my secrets the
safer I’m more protected I was but I
knew I wouldn’t survive the night if I
kept doing that and so I stood up and I
went to that waiting room and I sat
there until what felt like the early
hours in the morning I sat there until I
trusted myself to go back to my room and
get help fast forward to 2012 I had
survived that night but only barely
after another major surgery left me with
a 9 and a half inch metal rod in my
chest that held my insides together I
was being medically retired from the
military two years before I was set to
my contract was due to end and I found
myself with my car packed driving from
San Diego to Seattle when I returned
home I truly had no idea of who I was
well I felt an unending sense of
liberation I simultaneously felt a sense
of loneliness that I didn’t know how to
face what no one had warned me about
when I left those gates for the last
time was that I would feel like the
military’s cast away as soon as I got
home in place in the comfort and
familiarity of my military family was
only insecurity and doubt as to whether
didn’t know what to do
I had no idea what I was supposed to do
or what my sense of purpose was I lost
it but I got it back and then I looked
back and I never thought that I was a
part of a bigger picture what is the
bigger picture a lot of times the
biggest fault is that we isolate
ourselves we get caught up in our
isolation we feel that we’re alone and
we’re the only one experiencing that
deep dark paint we lack that community
we lack that sense of purpose
however as unique as the journey is to
the individual the shared experiences
are shared worldwide I too have a
similar story I have received a medical
discharge in 2005 and as excited as I
was I said yes I’m free I walked out
those gates with my DD 214 in hand
waving around like a crazy person I
might have blown it up a little bit and
put it on a nice little plaque I can’t
confirm that but something happened I
realized I didn’t have a purpose what
does that mean purposes is a huge part
for five years I served in the Army
right I didn’t have to have a purpose
because goddammit they give it to me
they told me you when to wake up they
told me when to go to bed do some
push-ups
eat your food I don’t have that anymore
the first five years of my adult life I
was told what to do now what so there I
went wandering wandering the earth
aimlessly with no purpose
taking dead-end jobs dead-end
relationships but fast-forward to 2015 I
got involved with a nonprofit called the
Mission Continues and with that
I found what my purpose was and it was
clear as day and that purpose got
stronger and stronger
over the years that purpose was serviced
it never changed my entire life at the
age of 17 I raised that right hand to
serve my country
because I wanted to be part of something
greater than myself and it took me a
long time ten years after I got the
military to realize that service has
just been something that I have always
wanted to do it is my passion to be
around like-minded people and everybody
likes to be around like-minded people
because it’s comfortable right we love
to be inspired and empowered by people
around us who have the same mission
vision and values as I do so there I was
serving with the Mission Continues
proudly and on my very first project
someone came up to me whom I did not
know he put his hand on my shoulder and
he said I need you to leave whoa
I just came here to to do some work guy
like let’s let’s back it down a bit he’s
like don’t worry I got you he gave me
the tools he gave me the instructions he
gave me the guidance he empowered me so
where do we go next right I’m beyond
survival at this point I’m thriving I
wanted more I know my Worth and I know
that I want more so what can I do a year
and a half later I took over that same
position he did as the first service
platoon leader in Tacoma and so with
that we serve in multiple communities
one of those communities is in the east
side of Tacoma where every month we
dedicate our time to a park and the east
side of Tacoma that is my community I
work with minority veterans as the
veterans of color program coordinator
focusing on equity and inclusion and
building a more inclusive environment
for minority veterans that is my
community I work with veterans of
everyone from everywhere because I love
veterans that is my passion so I’m gonna
do something really quickly and I
challenge you to take part in it this
right here we call this a nice hand
right I want you to take that hand make
it ever so strong point it in a general
direction of people and I want you to
say these three words are you ready I
want you to say you are dope go ahead
let me explain number one to be dope
number one to be dope you must be
determined with determination it implies
and you know that you have the knowledge
that it is not going to be easy people
will get in your way
but people will also vacuum that’s the
asset of a community number two it
requires you to be open handed now this
is a two-fold meaning number one
understand that an open hand has more
purpose and more uses than a closed fist
the open hand controls the fist and
anytime you could put it right back to
where it needs to be number two it also
means to be generous be generous with
your time be generous with the people
around you share your truth know your
Worth and if they don’t know their worth
give them those words it’s lovely I
promised to my wife I love you I needed
to be led and you pulled me while I
kicked and screamed to find my purpose
3b purpose-driven
understand that your purpose is
important and it goes back to knowing
your self work
you deserve the greatest of things that
you desire so go and seek them and keep
that purpose in your mind when you form
your vision and it will be ever so clear
lastly you’re empowering you understand
the importance of the position that you
are in and where you now stand I’ve
never thought in a million years that
I’ll be standing up here on this stage
talking to all you people looking good
right look good right
I wouldn’t have thought that I never
would have thought that I lacked that
self-confidence but people my wife my
friends my brothers and sisters they
empower me and that goes back to
generosity give it back I challenge you
to give it back whether it’s with words
or a hug you want a hug today I’ll form
a line I love hugs okay I do I’m a
hugger I am NOT a hand shaker I am a
hugger I’m a lover I am a fighter I will
fight for you day in and day out because
it is what you need it is what you
deserve you are determined you are open
handed you are purpose driven you are
empowering say it with me you are done
thank you [Applause]
Please follow and like us: