so I’m embarrassed that I have a career
I talk about things like trust and
cooperation and there should be no
demand for my work but the fact of the
matter is is there is demand for my work
which means that there’s an opportunity
it means that trust and cooperation are
not yet
standard in our organizations and yet
they should be and we know that which is
why we’re looking for ways to bring
those things to our organizations so I
thought I would do something a little
different today you know when you’re
speaking to tens of thousands of people
and you have the opportunity to share a
message of course most rational people
would say let’s go with something I’ve
talked about lots of times and I’m
really good at but I’m not normal so I’m
gonna do something completely new and I
hope this works out there are two things
that I think that great leaders need to
have empathy and perspective and I think
these things are very often forgotten
leaders are so often so concerned about
their status of their position and
organization they actually forget their
real job and the real job of a leader is
not about being in charge it’s about
taking care of those in our charge and I
don’t think people realize this and I
don’t think people train for this when
we’re junior our only responsibility is
to be good at our jobs that’s all we
really have to do and some people
actually go get advanced education and
so that they can be really good at their
jobs accountants or whatever right and
you show up and you work hard and the
company will give us tons and tons of
training how to do our jobs well shows
how to use the software they’ll send us
away for a few days to get trained in
whatever it is that we’re doing for the
company and then they expect us to go be
good at our jobs and that’s what we do
we work very hard and if you’re good at
your job they’ll pollute you
and at some point you’ll get promoted to
position where we’re now responsible for
the people who do the job we used to do
but nobody shows us how to do that and
that’s why we get managers and not
leaders because the reason our managers
are micromanaging us is because they
actually do know how to do the job
better than us that’s what got them
promoted really what we have to do is go
through a transition some people make it
quickly some people make it slowly and
unfortunately some people will never
make that transition at all which is we
have to go this through this transition
of being responsible for the job and
then turning into somebody who’s now
responsible for the people who are
responsible for their job and as I said
before one of the great things that is
lacking in most of our companies is that
they are not teaching us how to lead and
leadership is a skill like any other is
a practice’ balloon able skill and it is
something that you work on it’s like a
muscle if you practice it all the days
you will get good at it you will get
become a strong leader if you stop
practicing you will become a weak leader
like parenting everyone has the capacity
to be a parent doesn’t mean everybody
wants to be a parent and doesn’t mean
everybody should be a parent leadership
is the same we all have the capacity to
be a leader doesn’t mean everybody
should be a leader and it doesn’t mean
everybody wants to be a leader and the
reason is because it comes at great
personal sacrifice remember you’re not
in charge you’re responsible for those
in your charge that means things like
when everything goes right you have to
give away all the credit and when
everything goes wrong you have to take
all the responsibility that sucks right
it’s things like staying late to show
somebody what to do it’s things like
when something does actually break when
something goes wrong instead of yelling
and screaming and taking over you say
try again when the overwhelming
pressures are not on them
the overwhelming pressures are on us at
the end of the day great leaders are not
responsible for the job they’re
responsible for the people who are
responsible for the job they’re not even
responsible for the result
I love talking to CEOs and say what’s
your priority and they put their hands
on their hips all proud and say my
priority is my customer I’m like really
there’s no CEO on the planet responsible
for the customer they’re just not
they’re responsible for the people who
responsible for the people who
responsible for the customer I’ll tell
you a true story a few months ago I
stayed at the Four Seasons in Las Vegas
it is a wonderful hotel and the reason
it’s a wonderful hotel is not because of
the fancy beds any hotel can go and buy
a fancy bed the reason it’s a wonderful
hotel is because of the people who work
there
if you walk past somebody at the Four
Seasons than this and they say hello to
you you get the feeling that they
actually wanted to say hello to you it’s
not that somebody told them that you
have to say hello to all the customers
say hello to all the guests right you
actually feel that they care now in
their Lobby they have a coffee stand and
I one afternoon I went to buy a cup of
coffee and there was a barista by the
name of Noah who was serving me Noah was
fantastic he was friendly and fun and he
was engaging with me and I had so much
fun buying a cup of coffee I actually
think I gave a hundred percent tip right
he was wonderful so as is my nature
I asked Noah do you like your job and
without skipping a beat Noah says I love
my job and so I followed up I said what
is it that the four seasons is doing
that would make you say to me I love my
job and without skipping a beat Noah
said throughout the day managers will
walk past me and ask me how I’m doing if
there’s anything that I need to do my
job better
he said not just my manager any manager
and then he said something magical he
says I also work at Caesars Palace and
Caesars at Caesar’s Palace the managers
are trying to make sure we’re doing
everything right they catch us when we
do things wrong he says when I go to
work there I like to keep my head under
the radar and just get through the day
so I can get my pay
check he says here at the four seasons
I feel I can be myself same person
entirely a different experience from the
from the customer who will engage with
Noah so we in leadership are always
criticizing the people we’re always
saying we’ve got to get the right people
on the bus I’ve got to fill my wrong my
team I gotta get the right people but
the reality is it’s not the people it’s
the leadership if we create the right
environment we will get people like Noah
at the four seasons if we create the
wrong environment we will get people
like Noah at Caesar’s Palace it’s not
the people and yet we’re so quick to
hire and fire you can’t hire and fire
your children if there’s if your kids
are struggling we don’t say you got to
see at school you’re up for adoption so
why is it that when somebody has
performance problems at work why is it
that our instinct is to say you’re out
we do not practice empathy what does
empathy look like here’s the lack of
empathy this is normal in our business
world you walk into someone’s office
someone walks into our office and says
your numbers have been down for the
third quarter in a row you have to pick
up your numbers otherwise I can’t
guarantee what the future will look like
how inspired you think that person is to
come to work the next day here’s what
empathy looks like you walk into
someone’s office someone walks into your
office and says your numbers are down
for the third quarter in a row
are you okay I’m worried about you
what’s going on we all have performance
issues maybe someone’s kid is sick maybe
they’re having problems in their
marriage maybe one of their parents is
dying we don’t know what’s going on in
their lives and of course it will affect
performance at work empathy is being
concerned about the human being not just
their output
and we have to practice empathy and one
of the groups that we are pretty bad
practicing empathy with is our young
Millennials so let me show you what well
what empathy looks like listening to
understand trying to understand
someone’s point of view in this position
at a hundred percent of the talks that I
gave are the meetings that I have
invariably someone will raise their hand
and ask about the Millennial problem
apparently this young generation is
unbeatable apparently they have
confounded every single company in every
single industry and so now it’s at the
point where companies have given up and
are now just asking Millennials what do
you want and so they say we want free
food and beanbags and so now every
company has free food and bean bags and
guess what nothing has changed so what I
thought we would do what I thought I’d
do is show you what empathy looks like
how do we practice empathy with someone
we don’t understand how do we practice
empathy with an organization or a group
that we’re struggling with right so we
have to understand that it breaks down
to four things I’ve broken it down into
parenting technology impatience and
environment let’s talk about parenting
first too many Millennials have grown up
subject to what has been described as a
failed parenting strategy too many of
them were told as they were growing up
that they were special that they can
have whatever they want just because
they want it they got medals for coming
in last they got participation medals
right and the science and this is
already good we know that it devalues
the feeling that somebody who works hard
and comes in first place and it actually
makes the person who comes in last
embarrassed because they know they don’t
deserve it so it actually makes them
feel worse it actually doesn’t help
there are a lot of kids who got into
honors classes not because they deserved
it but because their parents complained
and they got A’s nothing because they
earned them but because the teachers
didn’t want to deal with the parents
right then those kids graduate and
though Goodis and they start a job and
in an instant
they find out that they’re not special
that you don’t get anything just cuz you
want it you get nothing for coming and
last and your parents cannot help you
get a promotion and in an instant their
entire self-image is completely
shattered in an instance the way they
view themselves has completely changed
turned on its head and so what you find
is that there’s an entire generation
growing up with lower self-esteem than
previous generations remember they have
grown up in an Instagram Facebook
snapchat world in which they are very
very good at putting filters on
everything they’re very very good at
curating how they want to be seen and we
think they’re full of confidence they
seem to have all the answers they seem
to be telling us what to do at the end
of the day it’s just not there it’s just
not true it’s just not true their
confidence is a lot weaker than before
they don’t know where they’re coming
from they don’t know where they’re going
they’re unsure of themselves and they
lack the courage to ask we say things
like my door is always always open
assume assuming that they have the
courage to walk through the door number
one then we add in technology there’s a
chemical in our body called dopamine
dopamine is responsible for the feelings
we get when we find something we’re
looking for or we accomplished something
we set out to accomplish you know that
great feeling you get when you cross
something off your to-do list when you
win the game when you hit the target
right when the client get the promotion
whatever it is that elation
find your keys that elation comes from a
chemical in our body called dopamine
right now all those substances are there
things that release dopamine include
alcohol nicotine gambling they go that’s
what makes us feel good when we engage
with those things and it’s the root of a
lot of addiction in fact almost every
alcoholic on the planet discovered
alcohol when they were teenagers
you see when we’re very very young the
approval we need is approval from our
parents and then as we go through
adolescence we now crave the approval of
our peers very frustrating for our
parents very important for us it allows
us to acculturate outside of our
immediate families into the larger tribe
very very important right it’s a time of
high stress and high anxiety and we’re
supposed to learn to rely on our friends
some people quite by accident discover
alcohol and the numbing effects of
dopamine to help them cope with the
stress and that becomes hardwired and
then for the rest of their lives when
they suffer some kind of extreme stress
they don’t turn to a person they turn to
the bottle right now we also know that
dopamine is released with cell phones
and social media so that Bing bass but
buzz flash and beep that we get from our
phones that feel so good it releases
dopamine we like getting it yes we all
hate all the emails but we love the Bing
right we’ve all been in this position
you know you’re feeling a little bit
down you’re feeling a little bit sorry
maybe feeling a little bit sad so what
do we do we send out 10 texts to 10
friends hi hi hi hi hi and we hope that
they write back because it feels good
right so now we have a young generation
with basically unfettered access to
social media and cell phones we have age
restrictions on alcohol we have age
restrictions on smoking and we have age
restrictions on gambling
we have no age restrictions on this
other dopamine producing device called
social media or cell phones it’s the
equivalent of throwing open the liquor
cabinet and telling our young
adolescents I know this is a stressful
time try the vodka it’ll get you through
these hard times that’s basically what
we’re doing and so what’s happening is
hot it’s becoming hard wired where our
young generation isn’t learning the
coping skills and coping mechanisms to
turn to another human being when they’re
struggling or stressed they’re turning
to social media or their cell phones
their self-worth sometimes becomes
wrapped up and how many likes they get
they obsessively check how many likes
somebody likes how many likes and
actually will get depressed
if they don’t get any you see them going
out with their friends and instead of
connecting with their friends they will
simply sit and talk on the phone let me
show you something that’s really
powerful can I borrow your phone please
there’s one right there between you just
let me borrow that for a sec I’m asking
you to give me somebody else’s phone you
don’t have to turn it on I just need it
thank you so let me show you this
subconscious power of this device what
if I were to hold my phone while I’m
giving this presentation I’m not
checking it it’s not buzzing it’s not
beeping I’m simply holding it do you
feel like you’re the most important
thing to me right now no you do not and
this is an artificial environment now
think about how often this phone is out
while we’re talking to other people hey
boss can I talk to you sure what’s on
your mind as opposed to sure what’s on
your mind we go out for dinner or lunch
with our family and our friends we have
meetings and we put the phone on the
table
which sends a subconscious message to
everybody else in the room that this is
not that important to me you’re not that
important to me and by the way putting
your phone upside down is not more
this is this is my favorite one where
the phone rings in the middle of the
dinner in the middle of a lunch in the
middle of a meeting and somebody goes
I’m not gonna answer it oh my god just
so magnanimous right thank you
right put it away keep it away because
what it does is it actually hurts our
ability to relate to each other now you
look at young kids these days they’re on
them all the time I don’t blame them it
is addiction we yell and scream at them
but we like yelling and screaming and an
alcoholic it doesn’t help the fact that
it’s a chemical addiction right so you
take an unsecure generation that now
through no fault of their own struggles
to cope with stress they don’t know how
to cope with and deal with stress and as
they have told me many of them will
admit that they struggle to form deep
meaningful relationships they will admit
that many of their friendships are
superficial right that their friends
they know would cancel on them if they
get a better plan that they wouldn’t
really know who to talk to if they’re
get depressed and maybe they’ll turn to
an online support group which is not a
real thing
it’s not human right and we’ve seen the
impact of this we’re starting to see
rises of depression in this generation
we’re starting to see rise of suicide in
this generation we’re starting to see a
rise of accidental death due to drug
overdose from this generation
universities are currently dealing with
an epidemic that they’ve never dealt
with before which is the number of kids
requesting leaves of absence due to
depression right now those are all
extreme examples the less extreme and
more likely example is that someone will
go through life just never really
finding joy or fulfillment and
everything’s just fine as your job
that’s fine how are your friends you
know they’re fine but no joy because you
just cannot because joy fulfillment
comes from this it comes from human
interaction we are social animals and we
need it and we have to learn to rely on
our friends and that skill is
desperately lacking
so you add in the next one impatience
this generation is often accused of
being entitled and if you’ve worked with
any of them before sure seems that way
but I would argue that we’re miss
reading the tea leaves they’re not
entitled they’re impatient again let’s
practice empathy how did they grow up
they grew up in a world of instant
gratification you want to buy something
you go on Amazon it shows up the next
day you want to watch a movie you don’t
check movie times you just log on and
download it whenever you want to watch
it streaming right you want to watch a
TV show you don’t wait week to week to
week just finish watch for the weekend
in fact if you want to get hold of
somebody you don’t leave a message on
their machine and wait for hours for
them to get the message and call you
back you just text them and they’ll call
you they’ll get back to literally
instantaneously heck if you want to go
on a date you don’t even have to be like
never learn the skill set of like what
are you doing right you can have four
dates in the night in other words
everything comes instantaneously they
have falsely applied the instant
gratification model to life fulfillment
and career fulfillment they wanted all
instantaneously the problem is life
relationships career are not
destinations like look I found the job I
love that’s not how it works it’s not
it’s not a scavenger hunt I’m looking
for the job that will be no it doesn’t
work that way it’s a journey it’s a it’s
a cut like it’s the same with love it’s
like I found love no you did you work
hard every single day to stay in love
it’s a journey
it’s as if they’re standing at the foot
of a mountain they know exactly what
they want they can see the summit what
they don’t see is the mountain I talked
to some recent college grads who are in
there in their entry-level jobs on a
regular basis and I’ll ask them things
like how’s it going and they’ll say yeah
I think I’m gonna quit
like I’m not making an impact I’m like
you know you’ve been to here eight
months right and this is the problem
they see it as destination I’m not
making an impact I hear it all the time
but they don’t even know what that means
impact yes we all want to make an impact
what kind of impact what you want to do
what how do you want to contribute to
the world is what vision is this is what
why is it’s become generic and abstract
but the problem is is they’re wafting
around they’re looking for the the right
they’ll go from job to job to job hoping
that the next one sticks they go from
relationship to relationship hoping that
the next one is the love what that I’ve
been looking for they don’t know how to
ask for help and there makes them feel
even worse because they can’t find the
thing that they’re looking for maybe
it’s me so if an insecure generation
that doesn’t have coping mechanisms that
wants everything resolved and resolved
now I have a thought let me just send a
text as opposed to let me wait an hour
when I’m done with lunch with you and
then I’ll send my text for example and
then we get to the fourth and most
egregious of the four observations
environment we’re now taking this
wonderful smart idealistic ambitious
hard-working good group of people that
were dealt a bad hand and we’re putting
them in corporate environments that do
not care about them as human beings
right we have for some reason our work
world has changed in the past twenty and
thirty years we are suffering the
side-effects of business theories left
over from the 80s and 90s and they are
bad for people and they are bad for
business
let me give you an example the concept
of shareholder supremacy was a theory
proposed in the late 1970s and it was
popularized in the 80s and 90s it is now
standard form today you talk to any
public company and you ask them their
priority and they say maximize
shareholder value really that’s like a
coach prioritizing the needs of the fans
over the needs of the players are you
gonna build a winning team with that
model but that’s normal today we don’t
even perceive it as broken or damaged or
wrong or outdated remember the 80s and
90s were boom years with relative peace
and a kinder gentler cold war nobody was
practicing hiding under their desks and
school anymore we are no longer in those
times these are no longer boom years
these are no longer peaceful times and
those models cannot work today here’s
another one mass layoffs using someone’s
livelihood to balance the books right
it’s so normal in America today that we
don’t even understand how broken and how
damaging it is not only to human beings
but to business you know companies talk
about how they want to build trust and
cooperation they announce a round of
layoffs do you know the quickest way to
destroy trust and destroy cooperation in
a business literally in one day lay
people off and everyone gets scared
right can you imagine sending someone
home to say honey I can no longer
provide for our family because the
company missed its arbitrary projections
this year and forget about the people
who lost their job think about the
people who kept their jobs because every
single decision a company makes as a
piece of communication and the company
cut the company has just communicated to
everybody else this is not a meritocracy
we don’t care how hard you work or how
long you’ve worked here if we miss our
numbers and you happen to fall on the
wrong side of the spreadsheet I’m sorry
we cannot guarantee employment in other
words we come to work every day afraid
and we’re asking our youngest generation
to work in environments where how would
any of us ever stand up and admit I made
a mistake
we’re cousinly being told you have to be
vulnerable leaders are vulnerable what
does that even mean it doesn’t mean you
walk around crying I’m vulnerable right
know what vulnerability means is you
create an environment in which someone
feels safe enough to raise their hand
and said I don’t know what I’m doing
you’ve given me a job and I haven’t been
trained to do it I need help
I made a mistake ice
something up I’m scared
I’m worried all of these things no one
would ever admit inside a company
because it puts a target on your head in
case there’s another round and so we
keep it to ourselves
and how can a company ever do well if
nobody’s ever willing to admit they made
a mistake that’s scared or they don’t
know what they’re doing and so we’ve
literally created cultures in which
every single day everybody comes to work
and liya hai lies hides and fakes and
we’re asking our youngest generation to
work and succeed and find themselves and
build their confidence and overcome
their addiction to technology and build
strong relationships at work we’re
asking to do this and these lis
environments we’ve created we keep
saying to them you’re the future leaders
we’re the leaders now we’re in control
what are we doing this is what empathy
means it means if there’s an entire
generation struggling maybe it’s not
them it’s like you know the only thing
that I that the common factor in all my
failed relationships me same thing well
we just can’t get the right app though
you know the right performance out of
our people maybe it’s you right it’s not
a generation it’s not them they’re not
difficult or hard to understand they’re
human beings like the rest of us trying
to find their way trying to work in a
place where they feel that someone cares
about them as a human being by the way
that’s what we all want in other words
it’s not even generational it’s all of
us
this is the practice of empathy that
have wish struggling to communicate to
someone if it’s struggling to help
someone be at their natural best I’m
tired of people saying to me how do I
get the best out of my people really
that’s what you want there like a towel
you Wingham how can I get the most out
of them
No how do I help my people be at their
natural best right we’re not asking
these questions we are not practicing
everything we have to start by
practicing empathy and relate to what
they may be going through and it will
profoundly change the decisions we make
it will profoundly change the way we see
the world someone’s driving to work
you’re driving to work and someone wants
to cut into your lane what do you do do
you pull your car up would you let them
in most of us pull our cars up and go
like this you wait your turn now let’s
practice empathy I don’t know maybe
they’ve been out of work for six months
maybe they had trouble getting the kids
out to school this morning and now
they’re running late for a really
important interview and they just have
to get to this interview and they’re
gonna cut into our lane or maybe they’re
just a bastard I don’t know but that’s
the point we don’t know we don’t know
and the practice of empathy we’ll say
I’ll let them in and I’ll arrive to work
one car length ly right we don’t always
have to be right we don’t always have to
be in charge we don’t have to be the one
who succeeds it’s not about winning or
losing and that’s where I go to the
second point after empathy comes
perspective where it’s not about winning
or losing in game theory there are two
kinds of games there are finite games
and there are infinite games and this is
how you’re gonna change your perspective
right a finite game is defined as known
players fixed rules and an agreed upon
objective baseball for example we know
the rules we all agree to the rules and
whoever has more runs at the end of nine
innings is the winner and the game is
over no one ever says if we can just
play two more innings I know we can come
back doesn’t work that way the game is
over right that’s a finite game
then you have an infinite game infinite
games are defined as known and unknown
players the rules are changeable and the
objective is to keep the game in play to
perpetuate the game when you pit a
finite player versus a finite player the
system is stable
baseball is stable right when you pit an
infant an infinite player versus an
infinite player the system is also
stable like the Cold War for example
because there cannot be a winner and a
loser there are no winners or losers in
an infinite game right it doesn’t exist
and because there are no winners or
losers what ends up happening in the
infinite contest is players drop out
when they run out of the will or the
resources to play but there’s no winners
or losers problems arise when you pit a
finite player versus an infinite player
because in a finite players playing to
win and an infinite player is to playing
to keep the game going right this is
what happened to us in Vietnam we were
playing to win and the Vietnamese were
fighting for their lives we were the
ones who got stuck in quagmire this is
the Soviet Union in Afghanistan they
were trying to beat the Mujahideen and
the Mujahideen would fight for as long
as is necessary
quagmire now let’s look at business the
game of business has pre-existed or has
existed long before every single company
that exists on this planet today and it
will outlast every single company that
exists that exists on this planet today
there’s no winning the game of business
and the reason is is because we haven’t
agreed to the rules I get this such a
kick out of this you realize how many
companies actually don’t know that game
they’re in right listen to the language
of the companies use we’re trying to
beat our competition we’re trying to be
number one did you know that we were
ranked number one look at the listing
based on what criteria revenues profits
market share square footage number of
employees based on what time frame a
quarter a year five years ten years 20
years 50 years 100 years I haven’t
agreed to those standards how can you
declare yourself the winner
how can you declare yourself number one
where no one else in the game has agreed
to the rules it’s arbitrary there is no
winning because
no end in other words companies are
playing finite games listen to their
language they’re trying to beat their
competition what does that even mean
it’s the leaders and the companies that
understand the game that they’re in and
organize their resources and their
decision-making around the infinite
contest that outlast and frustrate their
competition all the companies that we’ve
referred to as the exceptions Southwest
Airlines Apple computers harley-davidson
they’re the exception no they’re playing
the infinite contest they frustrate
their competition is what happens that’s
what happens because they’re not playing
to win
Jim Senegal the founder of Costco which
is the company the only real company
that gives Walmart a run for its money
he says public companies are looking to
succeed for the quarter says we’re
looking for the next 50 years you can
hear him he’s playing the infinite
contest I spoke at a Leadership Summit
for Microsoft I also spoke at a
Leadership Summit for Apple now at the
Microsoft summit I would say 70% of the
executives and this was under the Steve
Ballmer days I would say about 70% of
the executives spent about 70% of their
presentations talking about how to beat
Apple at the Apple Summit a hundred
percent of the executives spent a
hundred percent of their presentations
talking about how to help teachers teach
and how to help students learn one was
obsessed with their competition
the other one was obsessed with where
they’re going so at the end of my
presentation at Microsoft they gave me a
gift they gave me the new Zune
which was the competitor to the iPod
touch when it was a thing right and I
have to tell you this piece of
technology was spectacular
it was beautiful the user interface was
incredible the design was amazing it was
intuitive it was one of the most
beautiful elegant pieces of technology
I’d ever seen right now.they it didn’t
work with iTunes which is an entirely
but that’s something else I’m sitting in
the back of a taxi with a senior Apple
executive sort of employee number twelve
kind of guy and I decide to stir the pot
and I turned him I say you know I spoke
at a Microsoft summit and they gave me
their new soon and I have to tell you it
is so much better than your iPod touch
and he turned to me and said I have no
doubt conversation over because the
infinite player isn’t playing to be
number one every day with every product
they’re playing to outlast the
competition if I had said to Microsoft
oh I’ve got the new iPod touch it’s so
much better than your new Zune there was
a can we see it what does it do how we
have to see it because one is obsessed
with their competition the other is
obsessed with why they do what they do
the other is obsessed with where they’re
going and the reason Apple frustrates
their competition is because secretly
they’re not even competing against them
they’re competing against themselves and
they understand but sometimes you’re a
little bit ahead and sometimes you’re a
little bit behind and sometimes your
product is better and sometimes you’re
not but if you wake up every single
morning and compete against yourself how
do I make our products better than they
were yesterday how do I take care of our
customers better than we did yesterday
how do we advance our cause more
efficiently more productively than we
did yesterday how do we find new
solutions to advance our calling our
cause our purpose our belief our Y every
single day what you will find is over
time you will probably be ahead more
often those who play the infinite game
understand it’s not about the battle
it’s about the war
and they don’t play to win every day and
they frustrate their competition until
their competition drops out of the game
every single bankruptcy almost every
merger and acquisition is basically a
company saying we no longer have the
will or the resources to continue to
play and we have no choice to either
drop out of the game or merge our
resources with another player so that we
can stay in the game that’s what that is
and if you think about the number of
bankruptcies and mergers and
acquisitions it’s kind of proof that
most companies don’t even know the game
they’re in you want to be a great leader
start with empathy you want a group be a
great leader change your perspective and
play the game you’re actually playing
thank you very much [Applause]
I talk about things like trust and
cooperation and there should be no
demand for my work but the fact of the
matter is is there is demand for my work
which means that there’s an opportunity
it means that trust and cooperation are
not yet
standard in our organizations and yet
they should be and we know that which is
why we’re looking for ways to bring
those things to our organizations so I
thought I would do something a little
different today you know when you’re
speaking to tens of thousands of people
and you have the opportunity to share a
message of course most rational people
would say let’s go with something I’ve
talked about lots of times and I’m
really good at but I’m not normal so I’m
gonna do something completely new and I
hope this works out there are two things
that I think that great leaders need to
have empathy and perspective and I think
these things are very often forgotten
leaders are so often so concerned about
their status of their position and
organization they actually forget their
real job and the real job of a leader is
not about being in charge it’s about
taking care of those in our charge and I
don’t think people realize this and I
don’t think people train for this when
we’re junior our only responsibility is
to be good at our jobs that’s all we
really have to do and some people
actually go get advanced education and
so that they can be really good at their
jobs accountants or whatever right and
you show up and you work hard and the
company will give us tons and tons of
training how to do our jobs well shows
how to use the software they’ll send us
away for a few days to get trained in
whatever it is that we’re doing for the
company and then they expect us to go be
good at our jobs and that’s what we do
we work very hard and if you’re good at
your job they’ll pollute you
and at some point you’ll get promoted to
position where we’re now responsible for
the people who do the job we used to do
but nobody shows us how to do that and
that’s why we get managers and not
leaders because the reason our managers
are micromanaging us is because they
actually do know how to do the job
better than us that’s what got them
promoted really what we have to do is go
through a transition some people make it
quickly some people make it slowly and
unfortunately some people will never
make that transition at all which is we
have to go this through this transition
of being responsible for the job and
then turning into somebody who’s now
responsible for the people who are
responsible for their job and as I said
before one of the great things that is
lacking in most of our companies is that
they are not teaching us how to lead and
leadership is a skill like any other is
a practice’ balloon able skill and it is
something that you work on it’s like a
muscle if you practice it all the days
you will get good at it you will get
become a strong leader if you stop
practicing you will become a weak leader
like parenting everyone has the capacity
to be a parent doesn’t mean everybody
wants to be a parent and doesn’t mean
everybody should be a parent leadership
is the same we all have the capacity to
be a leader doesn’t mean everybody
should be a leader and it doesn’t mean
everybody wants to be a leader and the
reason is because it comes at great
personal sacrifice remember you’re not
in charge you’re responsible for those
in your charge that means things like
when everything goes right you have to
give away all the credit and when
everything goes wrong you have to take
all the responsibility that sucks right
it’s things like staying late to show
somebody what to do it’s things like
when something does actually break when
something goes wrong instead of yelling
and screaming and taking over you say
try again when the overwhelming
pressures are not on them
the overwhelming pressures are on us at
the end of the day great leaders are not
responsible for the job they’re
responsible for the people who are
responsible for the job they’re not even
responsible for the result
I love talking to CEOs and say what’s
your priority and they put their hands
on their hips all proud and say my
priority is my customer I’m like really
there’s no CEO on the planet responsible
for the customer they’re just not
they’re responsible for the people who
responsible for the people who
responsible for the customer I’ll tell
you a true story a few months ago I
stayed at the Four Seasons in Las Vegas
it is a wonderful hotel and the reason
it’s a wonderful hotel is not because of
the fancy beds any hotel can go and buy
a fancy bed the reason it’s a wonderful
hotel is because of the people who work
there
if you walk past somebody at the Four
Seasons than this and they say hello to
you you get the feeling that they
actually wanted to say hello to you it’s
not that somebody told them that you
have to say hello to all the customers
say hello to all the guests right you
actually feel that they care now in
their Lobby they have a coffee stand and
I one afternoon I went to buy a cup of
coffee and there was a barista by the
name of Noah who was serving me Noah was
fantastic he was friendly and fun and he
was engaging with me and I had so much
fun buying a cup of coffee I actually
think I gave a hundred percent tip right
he was wonderful so as is my nature
I asked Noah do you like your job and
without skipping a beat Noah says I love
my job and so I followed up I said what
is it that the four seasons is doing
that would make you say to me I love my
job and without skipping a beat Noah
said throughout the day managers will
walk past me and ask me how I’m doing if
there’s anything that I need to do my
job better
he said not just my manager any manager
and then he said something magical he
says I also work at Caesars Palace and
Caesars at Caesar’s Palace the managers
are trying to make sure we’re doing
everything right they catch us when we
do things wrong he says when I go to
work there I like to keep my head under
the radar and just get through the day
so I can get my pay
check he says here at the four seasons
I feel I can be myself same person
entirely a different experience from the
from the customer who will engage with
Noah so we in leadership are always
criticizing the people we’re always
saying we’ve got to get the right people
on the bus I’ve got to fill my wrong my
team I gotta get the right people but
the reality is it’s not the people it’s
the leadership if we create the right
environment we will get people like Noah
at the four seasons if we create the
wrong environment we will get people
like Noah at Caesar’s Palace it’s not
the people and yet we’re so quick to
hire and fire you can’t hire and fire
your children if there’s if your kids
are struggling we don’t say you got to
see at school you’re up for adoption so
why is it that when somebody has
performance problems at work why is it
that our instinct is to say you’re out
we do not practice empathy what does
empathy look like here’s the lack of
empathy this is normal in our business
world you walk into someone’s office
someone walks into our office and says
your numbers have been down for the
third quarter in a row you have to pick
up your numbers otherwise I can’t
guarantee what the future will look like
how inspired you think that person is to
come to work the next day here’s what
empathy looks like you walk into
someone’s office someone walks into your
office and says your numbers are down
for the third quarter in a row
are you okay I’m worried about you
what’s going on we all have performance
issues maybe someone’s kid is sick maybe
they’re having problems in their
marriage maybe one of their parents is
dying we don’t know what’s going on in
their lives and of course it will affect
performance at work empathy is being
concerned about the human being not just
their output
and we have to practice empathy and one
of the groups that we are pretty bad
practicing empathy with is our young
Millennials so let me show you what well
what empathy looks like listening to
understand trying to understand
someone’s point of view in this position
at a hundred percent of the talks that I
gave are the meetings that I have
invariably someone will raise their hand
and ask about the Millennial problem
apparently this young generation is
unbeatable apparently they have
confounded every single company in every
single industry and so now it’s at the
point where companies have given up and
are now just asking Millennials what do
you want and so they say we want free
food and beanbags and so now every
company has free food and bean bags and
guess what nothing has changed so what I
thought we would do what I thought I’d
do is show you what empathy looks like
how do we practice empathy with someone
we don’t understand how do we practice
empathy with an organization or a group
that we’re struggling with right so we
have to understand that it breaks down
to four things I’ve broken it down into
parenting technology impatience and
environment let’s talk about parenting
first too many Millennials have grown up
subject to what has been described as a
failed parenting strategy too many of
them were told as they were growing up
that they were special that they can
have whatever they want just because
they want it they got medals for coming
in last they got participation medals
right and the science and this is
already good we know that it devalues
the feeling that somebody who works hard
and comes in first place and it actually
makes the person who comes in last
embarrassed because they know they don’t
deserve it so it actually makes them
feel worse it actually doesn’t help
there are a lot of kids who got into
honors classes not because they deserved
it but because their parents complained
and they got A’s nothing because they
earned them but because the teachers
didn’t want to deal with the parents
right then those kids graduate and
though Goodis and they start a job and
in an instant
they find out that they’re not special
that you don’t get anything just cuz you
want it you get nothing for coming and
last and your parents cannot help you
get a promotion and in an instant their
entire self-image is completely
shattered in an instance the way they
view themselves has completely changed
turned on its head and so what you find
is that there’s an entire generation
growing up with lower self-esteem than
previous generations remember they have
grown up in an Instagram Facebook
snapchat world in which they are very
very good at putting filters on
everything they’re very very good at
curating how they want to be seen and we
think they’re full of confidence they
seem to have all the answers they seem
to be telling us what to do at the end
of the day it’s just not there it’s just
not true it’s just not true their
confidence is a lot weaker than before
they don’t know where they’re coming
from they don’t know where they’re going
they’re unsure of themselves and they
lack the courage to ask we say things
like my door is always always open
assume assuming that they have the
courage to walk through the door number
one then we add in technology there’s a
chemical in our body called dopamine
dopamine is responsible for the feelings
we get when we find something we’re
looking for or we accomplished something
we set out to accomplish you know that
great feeling you get when you cross
something off your to-do list when you
win the game when you hit the target
right when the client get the promotion
whatever it is that elation
find your keys that elation comes from a
chemical in our body called dopamine
right now all those substances are there
things that release dopamine include
alcohol nicotine gambling they go that’s
what makes us feel good when we engage
with those things and it’s the root of a
lot of addiction in fact almost every
alcoholic on the planet discovered
alcohol when they were teenagers
you see when we’re very very young the
approval we need is approval from our
parents and then as we go through
adolescence we now crave the approval of
our peers very frustrating for our
parents very important for us it allows
us to acculturate outside of our
immediate families into the larger tribe
very very important right it’s a time of
high stress and high anxiety and we’re
supposed to learn to rely on our friends
some people quite by accident discover
alcohol and the numbing effects of
dopamine to help them cope with the
stress and that becomes hardwired and
then for the rest of their lives when
they suffer some kind of extreme stress
they don’t turn to a person they turn to
the bottle right now we also know that
dopamine is released with cell phones
and social media so that Bing bass but
buzz flash and beep that we get from our
phones that feel so good it releases
dopamine we like getting it yes we all
hate all the emails but we love the Bing
right we’ve all been in this position
you know you’re feeling a little bit
down you’re feeling a little bit sorry
maybe feeling a little bit sad so what
do we do we send out 10 texts to 10
friends hi hi hi hi hi and we hope that
they write back because it feels good
right so now we have a young generation
with basically unfettered access to
social media and cell phones we have age
restrictions on alcohol we have age
restrictions on smoking and we have age
restrictions on gambling
we have no age restrictions on this
other dopamine producing device called
social media or cell phones it’s the
equivalent of throwing open the liquor
cabinet and telling our young
adolescents I know this is a stressful
time try the vodka it’ll get you through
these hard times that’s basically what
we’re doing and so what’s happening is
hot it’s becoming hard wired where our
young generation isn’t learning the
coping skills and coping mechanisms to
turn to another human being when they’re
struggling or stressed they’re turning
to social media or their cell phones
their self-worth sometimes becomes
wrapped up and how many likes they get
they obsessively check how many likes
somebody likes how many likes and
actually will get depressed
if they don’t get any you see them going
out with their friends and instead of
connecting with their friends they will
simply sit and talk on the phone let me
show you something that’s really
powerful can I borrow your phone please
there’s one right there between you just
let me borrow that for a sec I’m asking
you to give me somebody else’s phone you
don’t have to turn it on I just need it
thank you so let me show you this
subconscious power of this device what
if I were to hold my phone while I’m
giving this presentation I’m not
checking it it’s not buzzing it’s not
beeping I’m simply holding it do you
feel like you’re the most important
thing to me right now no you do not and
this is an artificial environment now
think about how often this phone is out
while we’re talking to other people hey
boss can I talk to you sure what’s on
your mind as opposed to sure what’s on
your mind we go out for dinner or lunch
with our family and our friends we have
meetings and we put the phone on the
table
which sends a subconscious message to
everybody else in the room that this is
not that important to me you’re not that
important to me and by the way putting
your phone upside down is not more
this is this is my favorite one where
the phone rings in the middle of the
dinner in the middle of a lunch in the
middle of a meeting and somebody goes
I’m not gonna answer it oh my god just
so magnanimous right thank you
right put it away keep it away because
what it does is it actually hurts our
ability to relate to each other now you
look at young kids these days they’re on
them all the time I don’t blame them it
is addiction we yell and scream at them
but we like yelling and screaming and an
alcoholic it doesn’t help the fact that
it’s a chemical addiction right so you
take an unsecure generation that now
through no fault of their own struggles
to cope with stress they don’t know how
to cope with and deal with stress and as
they have told me many of them will
admit that they struggle to form deep
meaningful relationships they will admit
that many of their friendships are
superficial right that their friends
they know would cancel on them if they
get a better plan that they wouldn’t
really know who to talk to if they’re
get depressed and maybe they’ll turn to
an online support group which is not a
real thing
it’s not human right and we’ve seen the
impact of this we’re starting to see
rises of depression in this generation
we’re starting to see rise of suicide in
this generation we’re starting to see a
rise of accidental death due to drug
overdose from this generation
universities are currently dealing with
an epidemic that they’ve never dealt
with before which is the number of kids
requesting leaves of absence due to
depression right now those are all
extreme examples the less extreme and
more likely example is that someone will
go through life just never really
finding joy or fulfillment and
everything’s just fine as your job
that’s fine how are your friends you
know they’re fine but no joy because you
just cannot because joy fulfillment
comes from this it comes from human
interaction we are social animals and we
need it and we have to learn to rely on
our friends and that skill is
desperately lacking
so you add in the next one impatience
this generation is often accused of
being entitled and if you’ve worked with
any of them before sure seems that way
but I would argue that we’re miss
reading the tea leaves they’re not
entitled they’re impatient again let’s
practice empathy how did they grow up
they grew up in a world of instant
gratification you want to buy something
you go on Amazon it shows up the next
day you want to watch a movie you don’t
check movie times you just log on and
download it whenever you want to watch
it streaming right you want to watch a
TV show you don’t wait week to week to
week just finish watch for the weekend
in fact if you want to get hold of
somebody you don’t leave a message on
their machine and wait for hours for
them to get the message and call you
back you just text them and they’ll call
you they’ll get back to literally
instantaneously heck if you want to go
on a date you don’t even have to be like
never learn the skill set of like what
are you doing right you can have four
dates in the night in other words
everything comes instantaneously they
have falsely applied the instant
gratification model to life fulfillment
and career fulfillment they wanted all
instantaneously the problem is life
relationships career are not
destinations like look I found the job I
love that’s not how it works it’s not
it’s not a scavenger hunt I’m looking
for the job that will be no it doesn’t
work that way it’s a journey it’s a it’s
a cut like it’s the same with love it’s
like I found love no you did you work
hard every single day to stay in love
it’s a journey
it’s as if they’re standing at the foot
of a mountain they know exactly what
they want they can see the summit what
they don’t see is the mountain I talked
to some recent college grads who are in
there in their entry-level jobs on a
regular basis and I’ll ask them things
like how’s it going and they’ll say yeah
I think I’m gonna quit
like I’m not making an impact I’m like
you know you’ve been to here eight
months right and this is the problem
they see it as destination I’m not
making an impact I hear it all the time
but they don’t even know what that means
impact yes we all want to make an impact
what kind of impact what you want to do
what how do you want to contribute to
the world is what vision is this is what
why is it’s become generic and abstract
but the problem is is they’re wafting
around they’re looking for the the right
they’ll go from job to job to job hoping
that the next one sticks they go from
relationship to relationship hoping that
the next one is the love what that I’ve
been looking for they don’t know how to
ask for help and there makes them feel
even worse because they can’t find the
thing that they’re looking for maybe
it’s me so if an insecure generation
that doesn’t have coping mechanisms that
wants everything resolved and resolved
now I have a thought let me just send a
text as opposed to let me wait an hour
when I’m done with lunch with you and
then I’ll send my text for example and
then we get to the fourth and most
egregious of the four observations
environment we’re now taking this
wonderful smart idealistic ambitious
hard-working good group of people that
were dealt a bad hand and we’re putting
them in corporate environments that do
not care about them as human beings
right we have for some reason our work
world has changed in the past twenty and
thirty years we are suffering the
side-effects of business theories left
over from the 80s and 90s and they are
bad for people and they are bad for
business
let me give you an example the concept
of shareholder supremacy was a theory
proposed in the late 1970s and it was
popularized in the 80s and 90s it is now
standard form today you talk to any
public company and you ask them their
priority and they say maximize
shareholder value really that’s like a
coach prioritizing the needs of the fans
over the needs of the players are you
gonna build a winning team with that
model but that’s normal today we don’t
even perceive it as broken or damaged or
wrong or outdated remember the 80s and
90s were boom years with relative peace
and a kinder gentler cold war nobody was
practicing hiding under their desks and
school anymore we are no longer in those
times these are no longer boom years
these are no longer peaceful times and
those models cannot work today here’s
another one mass layoffs using someone’s
livelihood to balance the books right
it’s so normal in America today that we
don’t even understand how broken and how
damaging it is not only to human beings
but to business you know companies talk
about how they want to build trust and
cooperation they announce a round of
layoffs do you know the quickest way to
destroy trust and destroy cooperation in
a business literally in one day lay
people off and everyone gets scared
right can you imagine sending someone
home to say honey I can no longer
provide for our family because the
company missed its arbitrary projections
this year and forget about the people
who lost their job think about the
people who kept their jobs because every
single decision a company makes as a
piece of communication and the company
cut the company has just communicated to
everybody else this is not a meritocracy
we don’t care how hard you work or how
long you’ve worked here if we miss our
numbers and you happen to fall on the
wrong side of the spreadsheet I’m sorry
we cannot guarantee employment in other
words we come to work every day afraid
and we’re asking our youngest generation
to work in environments where how would
any of us ever stand up and admit I made
a mistake
we’re cousinly being told you have to be
vulnerable leaders are vulnerable what
does that even mean it doesn’t mean you
walk around crying I’m vulnerable right
know what vulnerability means is you
create an environment in which someone
feels safe enough to raise their hand
and said I don’t know what I’m doing
you’ve given me a job and I haven’t been
trained to do it I need help
I made a mistake ice
something up I’m scared
I’m worried all of these things no one
would ever admit inside a company
because it puts a target on your head in
case there’s another round and so we
keep it to ourselves
and how can a company ever do well if
nobody’s ever willing to admit they made
a mistake that’s scared or they don’t
know what they’re doing and so we’ve
literally created cultures in which
every single day everybody comes to work
and liya hai lies hides and fakes and
we’re asking our youngest generation to
work and succeed and find themselves and
build their confidence and overcome
their addiction to technology and build
strong relationships at work we’re
asking to do this and these lis
environments we’ve created we keep
saying to them you’re the future leaders
we’re the leaders now we’re in control
what are we doing this is what empathy
means it means if there’s an entire
generation struggling maybe it’s not
them it’s like you know the only thing
that I that the common factor in all my
failed relationships me same thing well
we just can’t get the right app though
you know the right performance out of
our people maybe it’s you right it’s not
a generation it’s not them they’re not
difficult or hard to understand they’re
human beings like the rest of us trying
to find their way trying to work in a
place where they feel that someone cares
about them as a human being by the way
that’s what we all want in other words
it’s not even generational it’s all of
us
this is the practice of empathy that
have wish struggling to communicate to
someone if it’s struggling to help
someone be at their natural best I’m
tired of people saying to me how do I
get the best out of my people really
that’s what you want there like a towel
you Wingham how can I get the most out
of them
No how do I help my people be at their
natural best right we’re not asking
these questions we are not practicing
everything we have to start by
practicing empathy and relate to what
they may be going through and it will
profoundly change the decisions we make
it will profoundly change the way we see
the world someone’s driving to work
you’re driving to work and someone wants
to cut into your lane what do you do do
you pull your car up would you let them
in most of us pull our cars up and go
like this you wait your turn now let’s
practice empathy I don’t know maybe
they’ve been out of work for six months
maybe they had trouble getting the kids
out to school this morning and now
they’re running late for a really
important interview and they just have
to get to this interview and they’re
gonna cut into our lane or maybe they’re
just a bastard I don’t know but that’s
the point we don’t know we don’t know
and the practice of empathy we’ll say
I’ll let them in and I’ll arrive to work
one car length ly right we don’t always
have to be right we don’t always have to
be in charge we don’t have to be the one
who succeeds it’s not about winning or
losing and that’s where I go to the
second point after empathy comes
perspective where it’s not about winning
or losing in game theory there are two
kinds of games there are finite games
and there are infinite games and this is
how you’re gonna change your perspective
right a finite game is defined as known
players fixed rules and an agreed upon
objective baseball for example we know
the rules we all agree to the rules and
whoever has more runs at the end of nine
innings is the winner and the game is
over no one ever says if we can just
play two more innings I know we can come
back doesn’t work that way the game is
over right that’s a finite game
then you have an infinite game infinite
games are defined as known and unknown
players the rules are changeable and the
objective is to keep the game in play to
perpetuate the game when you pit a
finite player versus a finite player the
system is stable
baseball is stable right when you pit an
infant an infinite player versus an
infinite player the system is also
stable like the Cold War for example
because there cannot be a winner and a
loser there are no winners or losers in
an infinite game right it doesn’t exist
and because there are no winners or
losers what ends up happening in the
infinite contest is players drop out
when they run out of the will or the
resources to play but there’s no winners
or losers problems arise when you pit a
finite player versus an infinite player
because in a finite players playing to
win and an infinite player is to playing
to keep the game going right this is
what happened to us in Vietnam we were
playing to win and the Vietnamese were
fighting for their lives we were the
ones who got stuck in quagmire this is
the Soviet Union in Afghanistan they
were trying to beat the Mujahideen and
the Mujahideen would fight for as long
as is necessary
quagmire now let’s look at business the
game of business has pre-existed or has
existed long before every single company
that exists on this planet today and it
will outlast every single company that
exists that exists on this planet today
there’s no winning the game of business
and the reason is is because we haven’t
agreed to the rules I get this such a
kick out of this you realize how many
companies actually don’t know that game
they’re in right listen to the language
of the companies use we’re trying to
beat our competition we’re trying to be
number one did you know that we were
ranked number one look at the listing
based on what criteria revenues profits
market share square footage number of
employees based on what time frame a
quarter a year five years ten years 20
years 50 years 100 years I haven’t
agreed to those standards how can you
declare yourself the winner
how can you declare yourself number one
where no one else in the game has agreed
to the rules it’s arbitrary there is no
winning because
no end in other words companies are
playing finite games listen to their
language they’re trying to beat their
competition what does that even mean
it’s the leaders and the companies that
understand the game that they’re in and
organize their resources and their
decision-making around the infinite
contest that outlast and frustrate their
competition all the companies that we’ve
referred to as the exceptions Southwest
Airlines Apple computers harley-davidson
they’re the exception no they’re playing
the infinite contest they frustrate
their competition is what happens that’s
what happens because they’re not playing
to win
Jim Senegal the founder of Costco which
is the company the only real company
that gives Walmart a run for its money
he says public companies are looking to
succeed for the quarter says we’re
looking for the next 50 years you can
hear him he’s playing the infinite
contest I spoke at a Leadership Summit
for Microsoft I also spoke at a
Leadership Summit for Apple now at the
Microsoft summit I would say 70% of the
executives and this was under the Steve
Ballmer days I would say about 70% of
the executives spent about 70% of their
presentations talking about how to beat
Apple at the Apple Summit a hundred
percent of the executives spent a
hundred percent of their presentations
talking about how to help teachers teach
and how to help students learn one was
obsessed with their competition
the other one was obsessed with where
they’re going so at the end of my
presentation at Microsoft they gave me a
gift they gave me the new Zune
which was the competitor to the iPod
touch when it was a thing right and I
have to tell you this piece of
technology was spectacular
it was beautiful the user interface was
incredible the design was amazing it was
intuitive it was one of the most
beautiful elegant pieces of technology
I’d ever seen right now.they it didn’t
work with iTunes which is an entirely
but that’s something else I’m sitting in
the back of a taxi with a senior Apple
executive sort of employee number twelve
kind of guy and I decide to stir the pot
and I turned him I say you know I spoke
at a Microsoft summit and they gave me
their new soon and I have to tell you it
is so much better than your iPod touch
and he turned to me and said I have no
doubt conversation over because the
infinite player isn’t playing to be
number one every day with every product
they’re playing to outlast the
competition if I had said to Microsoft
oh I’ve got the new iPod touch it’s so
much better than your new Zune there was
a can we see it what does it do how we
have to see it because one is obsessed
with their competition the other is
obsessed with why they do what they do
the other is obsessed with where they’re
going and the reason Apple frustrates
their competition is because secretly
they’re not even competing against them
they’re competing against themselves and
they understand but sometimes you’re a
little bit ahead and sometimes you’re a
little bit behind and sometimes your
product is better and sometimes you’re
not but if you wake up every single
morning and compete against yourself how
do I make our products better than they
were yesterday how do I take care of our
customers better than we did yesterday
how do we advance our cause more
efficiently more productively than we
did yesterday how do we find new
solutions to advance our calling our
cause our purpose our belief our Y every
single day what you will find is over
time you will probably be ahead more
often those who play the infinite game
understand it’s not about the battle
it’s about the war
and they don’t play to win every day and
they frustrate their competition until
their competition drops out of the game
every single bankruptcy almost every
merger and acquisition is basically a
company saying we no longer have the
will or the resources to continue to
play and we have no choice to either
drop out of the game or merge our
resources with another player so that we
can stay in the game that’s what that is
and if you think about the number of
bankruptcies and mergers and
acquisitions it’s kind of proof that
most companies don’t even know the game
they’re in you want to be a great leader
start with empathy you want a group be a
great leader change your perspective and
play the game you’re actually playing
thank you very much [Applause]
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