how are you thank you for speaking for
the group up here
I come from an Italian house and it’s
hard to eat right other Italians here in
Montreal yeah you know what there’s more
than that here but they’re just there
they’re on the witness protection
program now we’re in the balcony yeah I
come from the very Italian house the
plastic furniture you couldn’t sit on
house that anybody have the museum house
Oh
towels you could never touch China that
no one’s ever gonna use everything in
this house is for a special occasion
that hasn’t happened yet my mother’s
waiting for the Pope to show up for
dinner one night with Sinatra or chachi
any prominent Italian and when you eat
over their house there’s a technique
when you eat over the Italian mother
mother’s house or the Jewish mother it’s
the same actually when it comes to food
I tell my friends i briefed them I go
look when you’re done with the meal my
mother’s gonna try to give you more okay
now listen carefully if you want a tiny
bit more tell her no just look right in
the eyes no I’m full buff a little bit
more right there yeah and if you want a
lot more yeah okay just a tiny bit more
boom another meal just like that you
stay one step ahead of heart that’s all
and if you don’t want any more you have
to shoot her yeah there’s no other way
none for me oh you take a little no I
don’t think so miss Romano all right
back off back off lady
put it back in the bowl put it back now
hand the spoon to Rey nice and easy
she’s got a cannoli in her apron
showed her and land one don’t graze her
that’ll piss her off
yeah she’ll take a bullet and keep
coming
oh I warmed it up yeah
he won’t stop she’ll flip it to your
aunt there’s always a fat aunt backing
her up somewhere
go get him feed him without me I went to
an Italian wedding last week these are
the most annoying things in the world I
don’t like any wedding because I don’t
dance and if you don’t dance
you can’t even step on the dance floor
without getting sucked into something
yeah that that train always gets me that
annoying people train you don’t even
realize it I’m gonna mentor him I’ll be
yeah you’re on a train that’s how that
little move started that’s all people
that were on their way to the men’s room
but I’m never gonna make it oh I’ve
never something better happens so yeah
and you can’t get off it
you can’t just disengage cuz then you’re
the conductor for whoever’s attached to
you right now I’m going into men’s room
get off get off me
last stop last stop right here no stay
on I don’t care stay on they’ll stay on
they’ll follow you right in hey where’s
he going hey what’s he doing alright
stop you stop
Oh shake everybody
[Applause]
yeah the Italians my wife is very
Italian we have a little baby now – it’s
very exciting now I have a year and a
half old daughter thank you you’re a
warm bunch of people alright I’m not
gonna bore you it’s the greatest thing
in the world you know what I can’t do
now I can’t write any new jokes because
all’s I do all day is try to make my
daughter laughs all my comedies for her
it’s frightening I’m losing my
perspective on adult humor really I’ve
written one new joke since I became a
father yeah is this funny wait this
[Music]
alright thank God yeah I’m glad you
laugh it otherwise I would have to come
in and rub my nose in your bellies now
my daughter’s running around the house –
that’s a whole other thing
you know you learned to adapt for the
first year when they’re just crawling
then when they start walking oh it’s a
whole other life I can’t have a normal
phone conversation anymore have you ever
talked to a parent on the phone all my
business calls are screwed up yeah
listen the 15th that sounds fine for me
sure I just need to know where do you
think you’re going with that cookie no
not you no I’ll be there I’ll be there
but you know remember that you’re gonna
fall you’re gonna fall no no I’d love to
come you know every time I’m there
I smell cocky I smell cocky when I’m
we bought a phone we bought a car for my
wife wants a car phone but no apparent
reason are they popular in Montreal car
phones yeah they’re so annoying you know
sooner or later they’re gonna make a
phone into a little chip little
microchip everyone’s just gonna have it
surgically implanted in their ear yeah
we’re all gonna have phones wherever you
go I got a call coming I’ll be right
I’ve one sec I got call hi Joe how are
ya what’s it yeah Oh my other one I’m
gonna put you on hold
hey yeah I’m talking to Joe right now
I’ll put you on conference go talk to
each other guys what’s happening Oh hold
on guys I’m getting a fax check out
these other great clips from WatchMojo
and be sure to subscribe and ring the
bell to be notified about our latest videos
the group up here
I come from an Italian house and it’s
hard to eat right other Italians here in
Montreal yeah you know what there’s more
than that here but they’re just there
they’re on the witness protection
program now we’re in the balcony yeah I
come from the very Italian house the
plastic furniture you couldn’t sit on
house that anybody have the museum house
Oh
towels you could never touch China that
no one’s ever gonna use everything in
this house is for a special occasion
that hasn’t happened yet my mother’s
waiting for the Pope to show up for
dinner one night with Sinatra or chachi
any prominent Italian and when you eat
over their house there’s a technique
when you eat over the Italian mother
mother’s house or the Jewish mother it’s
the same actually when it comes to food
I tell my friends i briefed them I go
look when you’re done with the meal my
mother’s gonna try to give you more okay
now listen carefully if you want a tiny
bit more tell her no just look right in
the eyes no I’m full buff a little bit
more right there yeah and if you want a
lot more yeah okay just a tiny bit more
boom another meal just like that you
stay one step ahead of heart that’s all
and if you don’t want any more you have
to shoot her yeah there’s no other way
none for me oh you take a little no I
don’t think so miss Romano all right
back off back off lady
put it back in the bowl put it back now
hand the spoon to Rey nice and easy
she’s got a cannoli in her apron
showed her and land one don’t graze her
that’ll piss her off
yeah she’ll take a bullet and keep
coming
oh I warmed it up yeah
he won’t stop she’ll flip it to your
aunt there’s always a fat aunt backing
her up somewhere
go get him feed him without me I went to
an Italian wedding last week these are
the most annoying things in the world I
don’t like any wedding because I don’t
dance and if you don’t dance
you can’t even step on the dance floor
without getting sucked into something
yeah that that train always gets me that
annoying people train you don’t even
realize it I’m gonna mentor him I’ll be
yeah you’re on a train that’s how that
little move started that’s all people
that were on their way to the men’s room
but I’m never gonna make it oh I’ve
never something better happens so yeah
and you can’t get off it
you can’t just disengage cuz then you’re
the conductor for whoever’s attached to
you right now I’m going into men’s room
get off get off me
last stop last stop right here no stay
on I don’t care stay on they’ll stay on
they’ll follow you right in hey where’s
he going hey what’s he doing alright
stop you stop
Oh shake everybody
[Applause]
yeah the Italians my wife is very
Italian we have a little baby now – it’s
very exciting now I have a year and a
half old daughter thank you you’re a
warm bunch of people alright I’m not
gonna bore you it’s the greatest thing
in the world you know what I can’t do
now I can’t write any new jokes because
all’s I do all day is try to make my
daughter laughs all my comedies for her
it’s frightening I’m losing my
perspective on adult humor really I’ve
written one new joke since I became a
father yeah is this funny wait this
[Music]
alright thank God yeah I’m glad you
laugh it otherwise I would have to come
in and rub my nose in your bellies now
my daughter’s running around the house –
that’s a whole other thing
you know you learned to adapt for the
first year when they’re just crawling
then when they start walking oh it’s a
whole other life I can’t have a normal
phone conversation anymore have you ever
talked to a parent on the phone all my
business calls are screwed up yeah
listen the 15th that sounds fine for me
sure I just need to know where do you
think you’re going with that cookie no
not you no I’ll be there I’ll be there
but you know remember that you’re gonna
fall you’re gonna fall no no I’d love to
come you know every time I’m there
I smell cocky I smell cocky when I’m
we bought a phone we bought a car for my
wife wants a car phone but no apparent
reason are they popular in Montreal car
phones yeah they’re so annoying you know
sooner or later they’re gonna make a
phone into a little chip little
microchip everyone’s just gonna have it
surgically implanted in their ear yeah
we’re all gonna have phones wherever you
go I got a call coming I’ll be right
I’ve one sec I got call hi Joe how are
ya what’s it yeah Oh my other one I’m
gonna put you on hold
hey yeah I’m talking to Joe right now
I’ll put you on conference go talk to
each other guys what’s happening Oh hold
on guys I’m getting a fax check out
these other great clips from WatchMojo
and be sure to subscribe and ring the
bell to be notified about our latest videos
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