yesterday’s tomorrow right so I’m
curious about what were the
circumstances in your past that help
shape your future to arrive here today
now I’ve been able to trace back where I
was in a small moment in my life that
led to me being right here right now it
was back in seattle washington on the
second floor conference room in the late
spring of nineteen ninety eight
something happened in that conference
room that changed my life forever we’re
finishing up a Monday morning staff
meeting and our receptionist said excuse
me yeah I went to high school with this
guy and his mom has to speak at some
medical conference I think it’s like
Tourette’s syndrome or something and she
was wondering if anybody here would be
willing to you know do some pro bono
work to help her with a presentation
well honestly the first thing that
popped in my mind was sounds like a big
hassle not interested so I was quiet so
was everybody else in that room so much
so they got so uncomfortable i’m
thinking to myself come on somebody say
something this is awkward suddenly i
heard the voice of my father say Barry
lead by example so I very reluctantly
said yes I’ll help those three words set
a series of actions into motion in my
life that would change me forever and
lead to me being right here at this TEDx
event where our theme is shaping
tomorrow what I didn’t realize at that
moment was that some
was offering me some magic beans magic
beans that would start an adventure in
my life when I was a little kid I loved
the story of Jack and the Beanstalk I’m
sure most of you are familiar with it
right Jack gets these magic beans they
get on the ground and all of a sudden
something shoots up it’s a beanstalk and
it goes all the way up to the clouds and
Jack climbs up he runs into this giant
there’s some fee fie foe fum around a
chase ensues Jack comes down chops down
the Beanstalk the giant dies and jackets
all his gold and Jack because of those
magic beans ends up having an
extraordinary adventure that changed his
life forever so when I was a little kid
I thought I want to get me some of those
magic beans I want to have an
extraordinary life and isn’t that what
we want we were talking about shaping
tomorrow we don’t want just an ordinary
tomorrow we want an extraordinary
tomorrow right well when I was a kid I
felt very ordinary and one day a teacher
read a short story I wrote and she
looked at me as she smiled and she said
Barry you’re extraordinary and I was
crushed because the way she said those
words I thought she said I was
extraordinary I thought I don’t want to
be even more ordinary so I want to be
very clear with you right now as we’re
talking about shaping tomorrow and
getting those magic beans because they
can lead to an extra super duper awesome
it’s possible now sometimes in life
things happen and just like Jack I
realized that I want some of these
extraordinary experiences to happen to
me so what do i do how do I get them
because it’s these extraordinary
experiences that become our memories and
our memories really make up who we are
right we are human beings are the sum of
our memories without our memories we
can’t make decisions we can’t decide
which road to go down our memories shape
who we are and so we have to think about
how do we get amazing memories how can
we fill our life with extraordinary
memories now I should mention what I do
for a living I am a professional memory
maker for most of my career I have been
helping brands and causes and all groups
of people to create influential memories
that will determine how people act how
people think how people by how hard
people work how much people donate and
the way we do this is we create
extraordinary experiences experiences
that are designed to educate and
exhilarate and motivate audiences to
truly fall in love with a brand and have
a long-lasting relationship with them
now I have learned a few things about
how memories are formed and I can tell
you about all the science it’s really
the you know our sensory perceptions are
is really just data that we get with
these biological receptors we have and
through a process called transduction
those that data is turned into something
called an action potential and that
sends an
true chemical charge through our body
and goes to our brain to the neurons it
goes down the Axum to the dendrites to
the synaptic level where this amazing
thing happens neurotransmitters are
released and those neurotransmitters we
can feel them those are our emotions and
it’s when those neurotransmitters are
released that connection happens it’s
encoded and that’s where our memories
come from those connections but you
don’t have to remember any of that all
you need to remember is this neurons
that fire together wire together say it
with me neurons that fire together wire
together and the more neurons that get
fired in our brain the more neurons are
going to be a wired in our brain and
that’s what becomes our long-term
memories but here’s the thing our brain
will not remember ordinary events it
will be in our working memory will be in
our short-term memory but eventually our
brain will just push it aside and it
won’t become a long-term memory now in
extreme cases where there’s a lot of
repeated sensory input there’s a
scientific word called habituation
habituation is when our brain just says
delete I’ll give you an example think of
a cat lady this woman who lives in a
house with like 25 cats and you go visit
that cat lady and you walk in the house
and you’re like holy Beyonce it smells
horrible in here well she can’t smell it
right because she’s knows blind that’s
habituation and speaking of being nose
blind right now you’re experiencing
habituation as you look at me because
your brain has deleted your nose look at
your nose right now for a second now
look back at me it’s just vanished so
our brain will make us ignore ordinary
experiences and guess what the opposite
is true our brains will only remember
extraordinary experiences experiences
that are filled with emotion vital multi
sensory experiences
so it’s my theory that in our lives we
should be trying to stuff it full with
as many of these extraordinary
experiences as we possibly can because i
believe extraordinary experiences equals
an extraordinary life but where do we
get these extraordinary experiences
where do we find those magic beans that
grow up into this giant Beanstalk well
here’s my first secret for you I believe
that we can get those magic beans when
someone asked us for help and we say yes
yes I’ll help or maybe you see somebody
with a need and that little voice in
your head goes you should help them say
yes yes is magical yes opens up worlds
of possibilities for your life yes is
this revolutionary catalyst for our
lives that allows these extraordinary
experiences to happen so say yes but be
warned when we say yes we are also
opening ourselves up to danger and to
pain and heartache and to heart felt
angst because we have to battle those
giants sometimes and it’s not fun
because sometimes in life happens
now the reason I use that word my
mom wouldn’t like me saying that
although she’s the one who taught me
that word
is exactly the right word because
in our life and this is the second
secret by the way in our lives when love
and grace touch it is miraculously
transformed into this life nurturing
nutrient-rich thing called fertilizer
and our lives really need fertilizer
fertilizer helps us become stronger
healthier fertilizer allows us to meet
our gigantic potential in life when I
was a little boy I had an encounter with
the Giant and this person was outside of
our family and he did some harmful and
very wrong things to me and he told me
if I ever shared this with anyone he
that shitty set of circumstances gave me
low self-esteem lots of shame and it
made me afraid of other people but
because of the miracle of love and grace
from my family my friends and my faith
that mirrored was miraculously turn into
miracle-gro and my life was changed and
I was able to find courage and have that
compassion for other people to help them
so that weakness became a strength
because it became fertilizer all of us
need this in our lives I know it sounds
strange but to have those extraordinary
experiences sometimes we have to do
battle with some really tough things and
by the way we can’t give in to the
temptation of just settling for the
habits and the ordinary life we need to
dare to climb that Bienstock we need to
go all the way to the clouds come what
may and yes we’re going to have to
battle some giants but it’s until we do
that we will never discover the gigantic
potential we have in our own lives now
this all sounds fine and fun is it true
it’s just a talk can I prove what I’m
saying well let me take you back to that
conference room in Seattle and we’ll see
if this works I thought it was going to
be a hassle and guess what it was a
hassle this woman lived not in Seattle
but three and a half hours outside of
Seattle and her name was marine Woodcock
and she wasn’t talking about Tourette
syndrome she was talking about this rare
disease I had never heard of called rett
syndrome r ett just so you know rett
syndrome is an X chromosome mutation
that happens there and it
primarily affects girls and women so
just imagine a little girl with the
symptoms of autism cerebral palsy
Parkinson’s epilepsy and anxiety
disorder all at once that’s the reality
of rett syndrome and it’s heartbreaking
but then I met some of these little
girls and I’m telling you I fell in love
with them and I was so taken with
Marines story that my helping her with
her presentations sort of morphed into
me saying hey let me help you with a
little video to help spread the word and
then that kind of changed and evolved
and suddenly it became a full-length
televised television documentary that
was narrated by Julia Roberts so
suddenly me saying yes turns out I get
to work with Julia Roberts I got to work
with her three different times and in
the making of this documentary I met
these amazing families and their
caretakers and their doctors and their
researchers and I was so swept up in
their passion to fight for these
treatments and a cure that when I was
asked to be on the board of directors of
the International rett syndrome
association i said yes of course but
then one thing happened it turns out
that I fell in love with the cause so
much I ended up quitting my job in
Seattle moving to Washington DC and said
I’ll become the executive director of
unfortunately rett syndrome directors
have to give talks in front of audiences
and at fundraisers and conferences and I
was scared to death of this it
frightened me so I decided if I’m gonna
have this job I have to to upgrade I
have to get better at this so I joined
this organization called Toastmasters
International to quickly learn some
competence and I’m so proud to say that
because of that little upgrade in my
life I got to be a small part of this
organization now called rett syndrome
dot org raising over 31 million dollars
for research research that is now funded
breakthroughs and they’re in drug trials
right now for treatments that are
actually
to change the lives of these amazing
girls and women so from saying yes
suddenly I’m helping to change the word
world and that led to opportunities in
my career to work at the Bill and
Melinda Gates Foundation the United
Nations Foundation wh 0 so suddenly my
entire life had been transformed but
there’s more that television documentary
ended up being aired on the Discovery
Networks and they assign an executive
producer to be in charge of that
documentary and we became best friends
and she has been my wife now for 14
years so all this happened from saying
yes but there’s more the former chairman
of the rett syndrome organization called
me up one day and she said Barry I met
this amazing woman and she’s been asked
to speak but she’s really nervous and I
knew you were able to get over your
nervousness I was wondering if you’d be
able to mentor her and of course at this
stage I’m like yes yes yes I’ll help
well this woman and I had a weekly phone
call and we still talk every day
everything every week and she was the
opening speaker tonight Dima Galway and
it was Dima that introduced me to the
amazing TEDx Spring Hill College Board
that asked me to be here so that’s what
happened in my past that shaped my
tomorrow to be here today and here’s the
final secret i have for you you want to
know what that magic is in those beans
when you say yes I’ll help and you start
taking action what you’re doing is
manifesting and creating love in this
world love that can transform lives love
that can give people courage love that
can change everything so as we talk
about shaping tomorrow I want to
challenge all of you pursue those magic
beings all right cultivate those
extraordinary experiences
do whatever you can to get rid of your
ordinary life and climb to the top of
that Beanstalk and battle those giant
conflicts you’re going to come in
contact with and deal with that horrible
crap but you’re going to get pounded by
but remember it can be transferred by
love and grace into this amazing
enriching fertilizer that can give you
what you need to fulfill your gigantic
potential in this world my friends
tomorrow when today is just a memory of
what happened yesterday I hope all of
you well think of all the speakers you
heard today and join with each other to
help all of us in shaping tomorrow [Applause]