I’m not 22 and 25 start teaching at 22
but the end of PhD at 22 to weird
I’m Aldi weirdo so I know 25 firstly I
wanna apologize for my French accent but
you know I’m a product of the French
educational system and we’re
internationally well known for that so
sorry in advance and secondly I will
have no slides not because I didn’t want
to prepare some but because my topic is
way too painful
for images actually so Syria was it
worth it this question I know you heard
it a lot I know you thought about it at
some point even if you’ve never heard of
Syria before even if you’re not that
interested even if you don’t study
politics or don’t follow the news Syria
was it worth it almost half a million of
dead people hundreds of thousands of
disappeared people millions of displaced
and refugees I don’t want to talk a lot
about the numbers because this is what
you hear a lot this is what you hear and
this is why this question always comes
back Syria was it really worth it
so I want to give you a reply maybe to
this question tonight maybe one reply
maybe one answer my answer and the
answer of a lot of Syrians because I’m
I’m Syrian myself today I’m not gonna
talk as a French I’m also French I’m
gonna talk as a Syrian Syrian from Homs
and Hama to martyr cities a Syrian who
also lost a lot of people so it’s not
because I’m here now that it’s easier
for me because I didn’t lose anyone I
lost 30 people of my family already some
of them under torture I lost one cousin
killed by – by Isis and his own home
while he was sleeping he was a rescuer
so Syria was it worth it really people
who you know saw other nations other
countries being free neighboring
countries asking for their freedoms they
tried
then yeah they went on protest was
peaceful at the beginning blah blah blah
you know and then it became a civil war
was it really worth it
well maybe a Syrian who died or a Syrian
who was in prison or a Syrian who was
displaced right now or a Syrian who’s in
this room and some of them are here can
talk to you and convey to you anything
even when they’re here because of the
language maybe thank God I can talk so I
will try to tell you about our story was
it really worth it why not just living
you know giving up on freedoms freedom
of speech free human rights giving up
why not just ain’t like that but staying
alive well you people I think you
haven’t tried not having this basic
freedom the freedom of speaking I think
you haven’t tried not having it in your
life I hope you have it I hope you never
try of course when I was in Syria I
lived for a while in Syria of course I I
was like I didn’t have it entirely but
you know it was temporary so it’s fine
but there is something worse actually
something that I think makes my answer
maybe interesting I’d say I tried losing
any not even freedom any possibility of
speaking freely for myself because I had
cancer myself Tom cancer exactly
actually this is funny and sad the exact
same week the student evolution started
my tongue was cut for the second time so
several times I completely lost the
ability to speak as you can maybe see I
love speaking I completely lost it it’s
not like this is the only thing that I
went through even physically because I I
always think of torture you know this is
what I have in mind that I think was it
worth it torture it’s I think it’s the
worst thing maybe you can agree on that
it’s the worst thing that can happen
maybe worse than death I don’t know so I
was disabled myself because of cancer
because the surgeries I had I was a
corpse honest
we are not exaggerating unfortunately I
could only move my fingers even morphine
I didn’t take it that well I could feel
only pain from head to toe I could feel
only pain but I swear I’m not gonna you
know and numerate my medical file
because you know what it would take one
hour but you know what take everything I
even lost my hearing twice also take
everything not being able to move being
in pain all the time everything not
being able to to stand not being able to
be independent depending on people for
anything not being able to lift a glass
of water take everything I swear to you
not being able to speak for yourself is
worse because when you lose when you
lose this when you lose this everybody
to just speak for yourself just be able
to say like no stop I don’t want to take
that I don’t wanna take this man I’m not
gonna do that
please go please leave my room right now
you can’t even say that you can’t even
say I want to go to the bathroom right
actually I couldn’t even eat or drink so
those things are basic things in life I
was hungry I was really very hungry for
days and days and days
I was very thirsty I couldn’t swallow
anything but still not being able to
speak it’s worse because when you lose
this I don’t know I can’t really explain
it to you I hope you’ll never be able to
try yourself I hope you’ll never be I
hope you never go through that really
but you’re nothing anymore you’re
nothing people they don’t even look at
you anymore they don’t consider you
anymore you’re nothing you’re just a
part of the wall when you can speak for
yourself
so was it worth it still okay it’s
horrible blah blah blah freedom human
rights of course idealistically it’s
worth it but so many dead like so many
dead people so costly so painful
well there is something really important
that you have to know when you’re in
that situation it’s not like you have a
choice and when I really like what
fascinates me with this question that I
always hear myself in my work at snow
spore from my students all the time was
it really worth it I want to answer I
mean ask this if you could ask this if
this was a choice so to let you know and
then you can judge for yourself about
was it a choice or not firstly talking
about Syrians you have to know when you
don’t have the basic freedom of speaking
it’s not only that you can’t like I
don’t know go and criticize the
President on TV we’re not even dreaming
of that when you don’t have this basic
freedom well you can denounce a husband
who beats you you can everything is
corrupt and you’re you’re speaking what
you say your words are amount to nothing
no one wants to hear you a child has no
rights in Syria a woman has no rights in
Syria
everyone can humiliate you if they’re
from the system you can say anything
they can beat you beat you to death
sometimes you can say anything so if I
had to take one example and this one
example is actually why this whole
evolution that should cost the movement
it’s so costly now it’s really a war
it’s a mess right now
chaos why it started I guess you know
why but still imagine yourself you’re in
Syria you’re in the country is corrupt
you have no freedoms you’re you will
stay at a certain level or your life
because if you don’t want to accept
being corrupt you’re not going to evolve
any way or the other
anyway I think only only grow worse but
you’re you’re just you just don’t say
anything you just shut up I’m sorry I’m
vulgar but like I worried so much I I
mean like I think I have the right to so
what I need to say over the world I say
it so yeah you’re only right is to shut
up and you’re like okay it’s too
dangerous
I’m gonna shut up and then kids kids
like from 5 to 16 they did the mistake
of writing things on walls and
and desks in their schools so they’re
taking their tortured so you’re your own
kid is tortured and you’re supposed to
never say anything about it so that
that’s what that’s when people were like
who cares and I’m just gonna protest
because I want my kid back and they were
shot and you know the rest of the story
is not where I want to go so is it
really a choice yes yeah it’s it’s
painful I know it’s horrible I lost so
many people myself
it’s horrible I can’t tell you how much
it’s horrible you know when you when you
just want to have just basic dignity
when you just want to just be a human
being
you’re not asking for anything big
you’re not asking for you’re not asking
working for big dreams even you just
want to have your humanity because when
you lose I felt when I lost my own
capacity to speak I thought I was not a
human anymore this was the worst thing
ever so when you were friendly with that
it’s not like to me asking Syrians was
it really worth it is like asking me is
it really was it really worth it going
through treatment because actually I’m
in pain all the time pain never went
away I have a lot of complications now
I’m talking to you I’m in horrible pain
I’m in pain in my tongue in my eyes
in my ears the left one especially in my
neck where I have a huge scar and other
places I ain’t been old all the time but
you I don’t know I don’t think anyone
would ask me was it really worth it
trying to cure your tongue you know you
could just have given up and never
talked again
you know it’s maybe it would have been
easier this is this is not a choice this
is not a choice for us it did go in ways
we didn’t want to but that’s that’s not
like it’s when you do when you refuse to
live like you know in your life that’s
worse than being an animal in a zoo
because you the animal doesn’t really
care about not being able to speak but
you care so when you refuse that the
moment Sharif
and you just want to be human I don’t
see how anyone can ask you is it worth
it I mean what happens next is because
this world is crazy people are corrupt
people are bad and you know yeah it’s
really painful this is getting really
long but that’s because when you let go
of something it’s so hard to take it
back as the previous speaker was saying
you let go of the girl well now run to
find her again so when you let go of
very important things as human rights
this is what happened in Syria people
were aware that we were aware that we
were being taken our rights but we were
silent because it was way too dangerous
so when things go bad things can go bad
in one second because chaos is so easy
destroying is so easy you know messing
up your room is so easy cleaning up
after it takes more time so can you
imagine with a whole country you let all
the rights go away well yeah it does
take time on my just my own example it
was so easy losing my health it happened
in a few weeks in a few months and I was
nothing I was I was nothing I wasn’t I
was honestly I was a corpse I was
disgusting it’s so hard to get it back
it’s so hard it takes so much work
hospitals appointments surgeries I can’t
even tell you how long it is just for
one person so can you imagine the scale
of the whole country we we lost so much
gaining it back yeah it takes a lot of
time yeah it’s costly yes but it’s
because people like Syrians nowadays
people like them here in Europe did that
100 or 200 years ago that me and you can
be here right now
and I think it’s worth it that as a
Syrian as the daughter of Syrians I have
a safe place to talk I have a place
where I can be the teacher political
science instance probably at 23 years
old I think it’s worth it yeah so yes
it’s costly yes it’s it’s horrible it’s
horrible but asking was it worth it well
it’s
a choice it wasn’t a choice so today
when you hear all that just know that a
lot of young Syrians who even died wrote
even in their will
the days where I was finally free were
the best days of my life the days when I
can when I could talk again where the
best days of my life I don’t care about
being in pain I’m talking I’m free I’m
here with you yes I’m in pain yes I’m
going through hell every day I swear
yes as Syrians we will it’s so hard it’s
so hard but we don’t want to stay living
like less than nothing we want to be
just you want to be human beings we want
to be like everyone else want to be like
you
this is what Syrians are so when you
please you can go home from with one
thing from my talk when you hear was it
worth it when you hear all those numbers
the dead people to injure the displace
the refugees don’t think that this was a
revolution for death don’t think that
this was for destruction that this is a
war yes it became a war but Syrian
people when we international community
managed to have a ceasefire they went on
protest again just a few weeks ago
because they’re still in it they still
wanted they haven’t given up this is
what they want and they’re saying they
say we won’t give up we want freedoms
want democracy it’s still worth it for
them so please don’t think that we did
all that because we don’t care about
dying because I don’t no no no this
wasn’t evolution for death this was a
revolution for life
for a good life for life with dignity
for human life real human life this is
what we want and yes no matter how how
much costly it is I can tell you and
many Syrians behind me some of them here
even I swear in Syria outside of Syria
we human rights activists we people who
believe
in freedom in human dignity human rights
in democracy and civil society we people
who believe in the future we believe in
human beings we believe in humanity we
believe in life but the real life the
good life not life as as less than
nothing we will never stop trying we
will never stop trying I will never stop
trying to defend human rights in Syria
and elsewhere I will never give up no
matter how costly that is I will never
give up supporting the Syrian people and
anyone asking for their freedoms so
remember this was a revolution for life
and yes life as you all know life is
hard sometimes you all here have goals
you all here dream you all here work
hard
you wake up early sometimes it’s hard so
yeah you would all agree with me you all
have your struggles I know it you would
agree with me
life is hard sometimes I know it well
you know it well but even when it’s hard
life is always worth it and this is what
we’re doing in Syria I hope you’ll
remember it thank you so much for
listening to me [Applause]