hi my name is Doug and I’m just gonna
put it out there I am a bigot I hate it
it sucks eggs it is not cool but see I
never started out to be a bigot I mean
who starts out to be a bigot have you
ever seen a baby bigot I have never seen
a baby bigger here’s the thing see I
grew up in a very diverse neighborhood
in Chicago four blocks from Wrigley
Field where the Chicago Cubs the world
champion Chicago Cubs play baseball and
so I lived on the second floor of a two
flat well downstairs Barney and Danny
O’Brien were Irish auto humor next door
was German next to him Andy Horvath
Hungarian across the street Joanne
yakamoto Japanese okay and down the
street angel Ramirez Puerto Rican this
this was my neighborhood and in school I
went to school with blacks and Asians
and Hispanics and Christians and Jews
and it this was just my neighborhood we
were just Americans so one afternoon I’m
sitting in the living room with my dad
we’re watching a Chicago Cubs game on a
new color TV color TV whoa this is so
cool and so we’re watching the game and
the batter gets up and he hits a fly
ball into the outfield one of our
favorite players Billy Williams goes
back to catch the ball and for some
reason he misjudged the ball and he
dropped it and my dad got extremely
angry and with all it is anger and venom
and his voice he says gotta send all
those jigaboos back to Africa what
Africa he’s an American what a
disgusting thing to say this was a
summer of 1963 I was 13 years of old and
this was the summer of the civil rights
march on Washington DC where Martin
Luther
gave his I have a dream speech do you
remember that it was awesome it was so
inspiring but I don’t know something
about what was going on must have
triggered some resentment in my dad and
I didn’t understand it but I did
understand one thing my dad was a racist
he was a bigot and I hated it
and at 13 years of age I took a step
back from my dad well that was a long
time ago August 2017 I was in the Denver
Airport
I had a two-hour layover on my way to a
flight to Boston where I was going to
give a keynote speech two hours later
what do you do people watch so I’m just
kind of watching the crowd I’m like oh
oh my goodness young lady this is
interesting green hair shaved on one
side of your head studs in your nose
studs in your lip Pierce is all over oh
my god black lipstick are you thinking
that this is attractive really oh my
goodness what is this a family with five
kids five kids in this day and age what
do you the Brady Bunch
yo Marcia oh man look at this guy is so
obese oh I feel sorry for that I hope he
doesn’t sit next to me wait a minute it
is nine o’clock in the morning what are
these people doing in a bar drinking
alcohol what is what is up with that you
hear these conversations going on in my
head these judgments these prejudices
this is where bigotry starts it might be
sparked out there but this is where it
grows and Fester’s and so I’m in this
airport and all of a sudden we see up on
a TV screen this breaking news break
what is this a March a protest thing in
Charlotte’s filled with these what are
these white supremacists and neo-nazis
inclu Klux Klan people in are those
Halloween costumes they look like
Halloween costumes with shields and bats
and guns and they’re beating each other
up and what is going on with these
people what is with this
eight and since when did being white
make you a victim what is that all about
this is so stupid
I was so angry about this I’m watching
this stuff and by the time I got home I
find out that some nutcase guy he’d
driven a car through a crowd of people
and he annihilated a bunch of people he
killed Heather higher I walked in and I
was doing I was still angry and I walked
and I said honey did you see that stuff
on TV that Charlotte’s whole stuff and
she said yeah yeah I saw and I said
doesn’t that make you mad she said well
I was mad that I’m not anymore says what
do you mean you’re not mad don’t you
hate those people they’re bigots I mean
they hate Jews and Christians and they
hate Jews and and and and black people
and Hispanics and they hate everybody
that doesn’t look like that don’t you
hate them and she says honey I don’t
want to have that kind of hate in my
body I don’t wanna be like them and then
she asked me do you hate them yeah I
think I do I think I hate them well then
maybe you’re a bigot too let’s look it
up honey let’s look it up so I look up
the definition of bigot a person who is
obstinately or intolerant ly devoted to
his/her own opinions and prejudices that
would be me
oh man no no no second definition one
who treats members of a group with
hatred or intolerance I’m a bigot oh my
god I’m a bigot because I am intolerant
and bigoted towards the bigots that I
don’t like I’m a big in about bigots man
no now I’ve become the old intolerant
white guy
this is disgusting oh my god this is
just disgusting so I have this I have
this realization I’m starting to be
February this year 2018 I’m at the
starting line of the Valentine’s Day 5k
we’re gonna run a 5k and I’m getting
ready to run and I’m looking around I
got about 500 people around me or we’re
all getting ready to run and I’m looking
at all these people I was like oh that’s
interesting this young lady looks
exactly like the one in the airport
she’s got pink hair with purple streaks
and studs and piercings and tattoos oh
my god those are gorgeous tattoos oh I
bet she’s fast
I bet she’s fast then I see this family
and there’s a whole bunch of people in
this family if there’s a mom and dad and
four kids and I’m thinking well isn’t
that nice they’re gonna run together
what a great family outing and then I
see a woman and she’s overweight and I’m
thinking oh my god look at her she’s a
runner she’s all ready to go she’s got
her bib she’s got a running belt she’s
going to be faster than me everybody’s
faster than me so there we are black
white asian Hispanic young old short
tall fat thin guy straight we’re all
ready to go we’re waiting for the race
to begin okay we’re waiting for the
countdown 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1 zero the
gun goes off and we’re running okay this
is good here we go all right yeah look
at all of these people okay wow this is
weird the same people that if I saw them
in a Walmart or an airport I’d be
judging them but today I think they’re
cool why is that they’re okay with me
today why is oh they’re runners my tribe
my context we have something in common
okay something common ground okay so all
right okay this is good this is oh but
this means that I choose when to be a
bigot and when not to be a bigot oh that
hurts oh yeah that hurts where is the
finish line I had a revelation about
bigotry while I was running my bigotry
is no better than anybody else’s bigotry
bigotry is bigotry hate is hate and
while I don’t condone hate speech and
violence and Prejudice I need to work on
my own prejudice I need to listen to
these conversations going on in my head
I’m gonna hear myself slipping into
these stupid judgments these ignorant
thoughts I need to say Douglas stop turn
my hate is not gonna change anybody’s
hate so how do you confront bigotry well
you feel like you’ve got to do something
get out of your house go to a March go
to a protest carry a sign show up and be
counted
let your voice be heard vote vote but
how do you talk to a bigot how do you
talk to a bigot what I’ve learned to do
is to listen I listen to the
conversations going on in my head and
when I hear myself slipping into bigotry
and Prejudice I say stop turn it around
find common ground well I told you about
my dad like that’s actually pretty
amazing he’s a boy scout troop leader
and when I was home 20 years later after
this event in the living room I was home
for Christmas my dad said hey there’s a
Boy Scout troop meeting tonight you want
to go I haven’t been to a Boy Scout
meeting in a long time yeah sure I’ll go
so we walk into this meeting and my dad
is surrounded by all of these kids black
kids white kids Hispanic kids Asian kids
there was even one little Indian kid and
they’re all looking up to my dad and
they love my dad and I did a lot with
him my dad changed I can change you can
change see here’s what I’m working on
it’s not easy I am working on empathy
not intolerance
I am working on compassion not
confrontation I’m working on love not
hate love for myself when I’m a jerk and
love for the people that I am intolerant
of I’m learning how to turn it around
and find common ground I would invite
you to join me because guys we got to
turn this around we got to turn this
around and find the common ground so
turn it around find common ground would
you say it with me turn it around find
common ground
thank you [Applause]
put it out there I am a bigot I hate it
it sucks eggs it is not cool but see I
never started out to be a bigot I mean
who starts out to be a bigot have you
ever seen a baby bigot I have never seen
a baby bigger here’s the thing see I
grew up in a very diverse neighborhood
in Chicago four blocks from Wrigley
Field where the Chicago Cubs the world
champion Chicago Cubs play baseball and
so I lived on the second floor of a two
flat well downstairs Barney and Danny
O’Brien were Irish auto humor next door
was German next to him Andy Horvath
Hungarian across the street Joanne
yakamoto Japanese okay and down the
street angel Ramirez Puerto Rican this
this was my neighborhood and in school I
went to school with blacks and Asians
and Hispanics and Christians and Jews
and it this was just my neighborhood we
were just Americans so one afternoon I’m
sitting in the living room with my dad
we’re watching a Chicago Cubs game on a
new color TV color TV whoa this is so
cool and so we’re watching the game and
the batter gets up and he hits a fly
ball into the outfield one of our
favorite players Billy Williams goes
back to catch the ball and for some
reason he misjudged the ball and he
dropped it and my dad got extremely
angry and with all it is anger and venom
and his voice he says gotta send all
those jigaboos back to Africa what
Africa he’s an American what a
disgusting thing to say this was a
summer of 1963 I was 13 years of old and
this was the summer of the civil rights
march on Washington DC where Martin
Luther
gave his I have a dream speech do you
remember that it was awesome it was so
inspiring but I don’t know something
about what was going on must have
triggered some resentment in my dad and
I didn’t understand it but I did
understand one thing my dad was a racist
he was a bigot and I hated it
and at 13 years of age I took a step
back from my dad well that was a long
time ago August 2017 I was in the Denver
Airport
I had a two-hour layover on my way to a
flight to Boston where I was going to
give a keynote speech two hours later
what do you do people watch so I’m just
kind of watching the crowd I’m like oh
oh my goodness young lady this is
interesting green hair shaved on one
side of your head studs in your nose
studs in your lip Pierce is all over oh
my god black lipstick are you thinking
that this is attractive really oh my
goodness what is this a family with five
kids five kids in this day and age what
do you the Brady Bunch
yo Marcia oh man look at this guy is so
obese oh I feel sorry for that I hope he
doesn’t sit next to me wait a minute it
is nine o’clock in the morning what are
these people doing in a bar drinking
alcohol what is what is up with that you
hear these conversations going on in my
head these judgments these prejudices
this is where bigotry starts it might be
sparked out there but this is where it
grows and Fester’s and so I’m in this
airport and all of a sudden we see up on
a TV screen this breaking news break
what is this a March a protest thing in
Charlotte’s filled with these what are
these white supremacists and neo-nazis
inclu Klux Klan people in are those
Halloween costumes they look like
Halloween costumes with shields and bats
and guns and they’re beating each other
up and what is going on with these
people what is with this
eight and since when did being white
make you a victim what is that all about
this is so stupid
I was so angry about this I’m watching
this stuff and by the time I got home I
find out that some nutcase guy he’d
driven a car through a crowd of people
and he annihilated a bunch of people he
killed Heather higher I walked in and I
was doing I was still angry and I walked
and I said honey did you see that stuff
on TV that Charlotte’s whole stuff and
she said yeah yeah I saw and I said
doesn’t that make you mad she said well
I was mad that I’m not anymore says what
do you mean you’re not mad don’t you
hate those people they’re bigots I mean
they hate Jews and Christians and they
hate Jews and and and and black people
and Hispanics and they hate everybody
that doesn’t look like that don’t you
hate them and she says honey I don’t
want to have that kind of hate in my
body I don’t wanna be like them and then
she asked me do you hate them yeah I
think I do I think I hate them well then
maybe you’re a bigot too let’s look it
up honey let’s look it up so I look up
the definition of bigot a person who is
obstinately or intolerant ly devoted to
his/her own opinions and prejudices that
would be me
oh man no no no second definition one
who treats members of a group with
hatred or intolerance I’m a bigot oh my
god I’m a bigot because I am intolerant
and bigoted towards the bigots that I
don’t like I’m a big in about bigots man
no now I’ve become the old intolerant
white guy
this is disgusting oh my god this is
just disgusting so I have this I have
this realization I’m starting to be
February this year 2018 I’m at the
starting line of the Valentine’s Day 5k
we’re gonna run a 5k and I’m getting
ready to run and I’m looking around I
got about 500 people around me or we’re
all getting ready to run and I’m looking
at all these people I was like oh that’s
interesting this young lady looks
exactly like the one in the airport
she’s got pink hair with purple streaks
and studs and piercings and tattoos oh
my god those are gorgeous tattoos oh I
bet she’s fast
I bet she’s fast then I see this family
and there’s a whole bunch of people in
this family if there’s a mom and dad and
four kids and I’m thinking well isn’t
that nice they’re gonna run together
what a great family outing and then I
see a woman and she’s overweight and I’m
thinking oh my god look at her she’s a
runner she’s all ready to go she’s got
her bib she’s got a running belt she’s
going to be faster than me everybody’s
faster than me so there we are black
white asian Hispanic young old short
tall fat thin guy straight we’re all
ready to go we’re waiting for the race
to begin okay we’re waiting for the
countdown 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1 zero the
gun goes off and we’re running okay this
is good here we go all right yeah look
at all of these people okay wow this is
weird the same people that if I saw them
in a Walmart or an airport I’d be
judging them but today I think they’re
cool why is that they’re okay with me
today why is oh they’re runners my tribe
my context we have something in common
okay something common ground okay so all
right okay this is good this is oh but
this means that I choose when to be a
bigot and when not to be a bigot oh that
hurts oh yeah that hurts where is the
finish line I had a revelation about
bigotry while I was running my bigotry
is no better than anybody else’s bigotry
bigotry is bigotry hate is hate and
while I don’t condone hate speech and
violence and Prejudice I need to work on
my own prejudice I need to listen to
these conversations going on in my head
I’m gonna hear myself slipping into
these stupid judgments these ignorant
thoughts I need to say Douglas stop turn
my hate is not gonna change anybody’s
hate so how do you confront bigotry well
you feel like you’ve got to do something
get out of your house go to a March go
to a protest carry a sign show up and be
counted
let your voice be heard vote vote but
how do you talk to a bigot how do you
talk to a bigot what I’ve learned to do
is to listen I listen to the
conversations going on in my head and
when I hear myself slipping into bigotry
and Prejudice I say stop turn it around
find common ground well I told you about
my dad like that’s actually pretty
amazing he’s a boy scout troop leader
and when I was home 20 years later after
this event in the living room I was home
for Christmas my dad said hey there’s a
Boy Scout troop meeting tonight you want
to go I haven’t been to a Boy Scout
meeting in a long time yeah sure I’ll go
so we walk into this meeting and my dad
is surrounded by all of these kids black
kids white kids Hispanic kids Asian kids
there was even one little Indian kid and
they’re all looking up to my dad and
they love my dad and I did a lot with
him my dad changed I can change you can
change see here’s what I’m working on
it’s not easy I am working on empathy
not intolerance
I am working on compassion not
confrontation I’m working on love not
hate love for myself when I’m a jerk and
love for the people that I am intolerant
of I’m learning how to turn it around
and find common ground I would invite
you to join me because guys we got to
turn this around we got to turn this
around and find the common ground so
turn it around find common ground would
you say it with me turn it around find
common ground
thank you [Applause]
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