depression can get to anyone it got me
when I was a teenager now it is
incredibly difficult to explain
depression to someone who’s never
experienced it before being depressed
doesn’t necessarily mean you’d want to
take your own life more often than not
it means you wouldn’t mind if you just
disappeared never to return but after
trying and failing to explain this
multiple times
I discovered it really all boils down
into one sentence I didn’t want to die I
just didn’t want to live now I would get
mad at myself because I felt like I had
no reason to be sad or tired or
depressed I had an amazing childhood I
create friends I had a long-term
girlfriend I had good grades in school
and by good grades I mean I knew exactly
how much I had to study to get a solid
when I was just shy of 16 years old I
decided to tell a couple of friends I
felt depressed I don’t know what I
expected I think I fought just telling
them would make me feel better they did
not I noticed that people don’t always
know how to show their support to
someone suffering from depression they
want to show their support but how well
let’s talk about it there are multiple
ways to show your support to someone
suffering from depression four of which
I will go into now the first method is
what I called a good life method now
when I told my friends about my
depression a lot of them will react
along the same lines they would say but
Jonathan you have such a good life you
have so much to be happy for why are you
not happy look at that guy he has
reasons to be unhappy but he’s not so
why are you
now this didn’t work out all that well
because even though they had the best
intentions it would always come across
as why are you being such a crybaby
and this didn’t help especially because
there’s already mad at myself for
feeling this way now the second method
as what I call D oh thanks I’m cured now
method this is where someone will come
up to me and say you know I was
depressed once and I just stopped
thinking about it
and then I felt better and that’s what
they would tell me to do now these
people almost always seem to forget that
depression is an actual illness so it
would be like telling someone with the
flu have you tried you know not having
now the third method that’s what I call
to hear when you need to talk method
these are usually close friends who are
once know how you’re doing nearly every
waking minute of every day and for a lot
of people this will help a lot of people
really do just need that constant outlet
to send – now I don’t like to talk about
my emotions a lot I listen to and make
music as now look for these emotions so
I rarely feel the need to talk to other
people and this is where the fourth and
last method comes in I called us to just
sit here with me method now let me tell
you about one of the most memorable
I came home from school at about 1:00 in
the afternoon because I rarely ever went
to school for the full day said about
the house for 30 minutes and a friend of
mine Ramya he said Jonathan what the
park we got music we got snacks we got a
case of beer coming out with little
hesitation I decided to join them and so
we went to the park and all we did was
sit there listen to music and drink a
the conversation was pretty much
non-existent for the greater part of the
afternoon and when there was an ongoing
conversation it was probably just
incredibly shallow or incredibly funny
and that’s the part that worked for me
being surrounded by friends who didn’t
treat me any differently because of how
I felt they all knew about it and they
all thought it would be best not to talk
about it because if I wanted to talk
about it I probably would have said
something in these cases I was able to
focus on the bad jokes my friends were
telling me it was the first time that
entire school year now I truly felt
now I don’t do well on my own but I 5-1
and my friends I’ve learned that if I
have the option to go and see French I
should always take it it took a lot of
time to start asking friends to hang out
it even took a lot of time to start
accepting these invitations but to me
that one day in the park was a turning
point I now knew my ability to feel
happiness didn’t disappear but a lot of
the times I need friends around me to
trigger the emotion and it’s not about
feeling truly happy all the time when
you were friends it’s more about being
occupied in these cases my mind was able
to focus on the stories my friends were
telling me and intense calculations
about how cold the coldest beer in the
fridge should be by now now I came
across all of these methods when I was
depressed to just sit here with me
method is the one that worked for me I’m
really glad I found that out but there’s
one thing that worries me and that’s
that the first two methods the good life
and the oh thanks I’m cured now method
are far more common than the last two
and this worries me because these
methods did more harm than good
because in the end it wasn’t the people
who kept saying you’ll be fine
that held me for my depression and
what’s the people who just showed up
sitting next to me and had a beer with
me while watching sports so if you know
someone someone like me or someone else
suffering from mental issues go knock on
their door bring a six-pack bring a
slice of pizza and either be the ear
they need to vent to or the person that
would just sit there with them because
sometimes your words may do more harm
than good to just your presence
might go a long way [Applause]
when I was a teenager now it is
incredibly difficult to explain
depression to someone who’s never
experienced it before being depressed
doesn’t necessarily mean you’d want to
take your own life more often than not
it means you wouldn’t mind if you just
disappeared never to return but after
trying and failing to explain this
multiple times
I discovered it really all boils down
into one sentence I didn’t want to die I
just didn’t want to live now I would get
mad at myself because I felt like I had
no reason to be sad or tired or
depressed I had an amazing childhood I
create friends I had a long-term
girlfriend I had good grades in school
and by good grades I mean I knew exactly
how much I had to study to get a solid
when I was just shy of 16 years old I
decided to tell a couple of friends I
felt depressed I don’t know what I
expected I think I fought just telling
them would make me feel better they did
not I noticed that people don’t always
know how to show their support to
someone suffering from depression they
want to show their support but how well
let’s talk about it there are multiple
ways to show your support to someone
suffering from depression four of which
I will go into now the first method is
what I called a good life method now
when I told my friends about my
depression a lot of them will react
along the same lines they would say but
Jonathan you have such a good life you
have so much to be happy for why are you
not happy look at that guy he has
reasons to be unhappy but he’s not so
why are you
now this didn’t work out all that well
because even though they had the best
intentions it would always come across
as why are you being such a crybaby
and this didn’t help especially because
there’s already mad at myself for
feeling this way now the second method
as what I call D oh thanks I’m cured now
method this is where someone will come
up to me and say you know I was
depressed once and I just stopped
thinking about it
and then I felt better and that’s what
they would tell me to do now these
people almost always seem to forget that
depression is an actual illness so it
would be like telling someone with the
flu have you tried you know not having
now the third method that’s what I call
to hear when you need to talk method
these are usually close friends who are
once know how you’re doing nearly every
waking minute of every day and for a lot
of people this will help a lot of people
really do just need that constant outlet
to send – now I don’t like to talk about
my emotions a lot I listen to and make
music as now look for these emotions so
I rarely feel the need to talk to other
people and this is where the fourth and
last method comes in I called us to just
sit here with me method now let me tell
you about one of the most memorable
I came home from school at about 1:00 in
the afternoon because I rarely ever went
to school for the full day said about
the house for 30 minutes and a friend of
mine Ramya he said Jonathan what the
park we got music we got snacks we got a
case of beer coming out with little
hesitation I decided to join them and so
we went to the park and all we did was
sit there listen to music and drink a
the conversation was pretty much
non-existent for the greater part of the
afternoon and when there was an ongoing
conversation it was probably just
incredibly shallow or incredibly funny
and that’s the part that worked for me
being surrounded by friends who didn’t
treat me any differently because of how
I felt they all knew about it and they
all thought it would be best not to talk
about it because if I wanted to talk
about it I probably would have said
something in these cases I was able to
focus on the bad jokes my friends were
telling me it was the first time that
entire school year now I truly felt
now I don’t do well on my own but I 5-1
and my friends I’ve learned that if I
have the option to go and see French I
should always take it it took a lot of
time to start asking friends to hang out
it even took a lot of time to start
accepting these invitations but to me
that one day in the park was a turning
point I now knew my ability to feel
happiness didn’t disappear but a lot of
the times I need friends around me to
trigger the emotion and it’s not about
feeling truly happy all the time when
you were friends it’s more about being
occupied in these cases my mind was able
to focus on the stories my friends were
telling me and intense calculations
about how cold the coldest beer in the
fridge should be by now now I came
across all of these methods when I was
depressed to just sit here with me
method is the one that worked for me I’m
really glad I found that out but there’s
one thing that worries me and that’s
that the first two methods the good life
and the oh thanks I’m cured now method
are far more common than the last two
and this worries me because these
methods did more harm than good
because in the end it wasn’t the people
who kept saying you’ll be fine
that held me for my depression and
what’s the people who just showed up
sitting next to me and had a beer with
me while watching sports so if you know
someone someone like me or someone else
suffering from mental issues go knock on
their door bring a six-pack bring a
slice of pizza and either be the ear
they need to vent to or the person that
would just sit there with them because
sometimes your words may do more harm
than good to just your presence
might go a long way [Applause]
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