[Applause]
Wow
Wow I haven’t even started yet Wow
hello everyone before I do get started I
wanted to address the elephant in the
room I know what a lot of you may have
been thinking when you saw me walk
across the stage and it’s fine I get it
all the time uh so here it is no I’m not
single sorry sorry sorry
[Applause]
Wow no I’m glad we I’m glad we got that
one off our chest all right now we can
now we can get gone right now what you
may not have noticed is I have a
physical disability called cerebral
palsy for those of you who do not know
what that is cerebral palsy is a
condition that is marked by impaired
muscle coordination and/or other
disabilities typically caused by brain
damage before or at birth thankfully for
me it really only affects my right leg
so when I was 22 months old my parents
took me to the doctor to find out why
this wasn’t happening like why you know
I I’m not the oldest in the family and
they wanted to know why and the doctor
examined me and said oh your son has CP
oh sorry um CP is is this missing
explained that he explained the
condition and then he basically told my
parents that I would never run I would
never walk jump swim climb ride a bike
name it basically anything physically
fun so my parents were shocked at this
news that they now have a son with a
disability this is going to be a new
challenge for the family right but as
they got on the elevator to leave the
office my dad turns to my mom and he
says no my son will do all of those
things and I have seven surgeries later
I can run I can walk I can jump swim
climb I can even ride a bike for about
ten seconds before it all just kind of
goes
right but I I don’t want to make it
sound like it’s a walk in the park it’s
been really hard I fall over all of the
time ten years ago I was falling several
times a day now I fall maybe two to
three times a week my grandpa taught me
a very important lesson he would always
tell me when I was little he’d say
Matthew your disability is just a
nuisance your CP is just a nuisance
that’s all it is sudden he’d say and
he’d put me in a headlock and he dig his
tooth to my forehead he teased me just
like grandpa’s tease your grandchildren
me just like every one of the other
grandchildren in the family the impact
of that sentence on my life is
indescribable what my parents and my
grandpa were trying to teach me was that
CP for me was a nuisance but it wasn’t
me it wasn’t a part of my character my
personality or who I fundamentally was
it didn’t get to dictate outcomes it was
simply the context within which I’d of
my life so here’s my question how many
of us have our own disabilities we’ll
call them that we consider as part of
our character let’s remind ourselves the
definition of a disability a physical or
mental condition that limits one’s
movements senses or activities so that
condition or that disability could just
as easily be the belief that you don’t
think you’re good enough maybe you come
from a broken family maybe you didn’t
have the same opportunities as somebody
else whatever it is how have you allowed
that disability to become a part of your
character and more importantly how have
you allowed that disability to inhibit
what you really want to get out of life
so when we separate these obstacles or
these challenges from our character and
we consider them as nuisances we allow
ourselves to see more clearly who we
really are and that lets us dictate the
outcome not the disability so here are
some things that I’ve thought of that
have helped me to do too
separate the disability from my
character and move forward
the first is whenever I’m tempted to not
do something because I don’t think I’m
capable I have to ask myself Matthew how
much of this is the CP talking versus
just you how much of this is about fear
uncertainty and doubt basically if it’s
not about my right leg that I’m forced
to face up to the fact that the reason
that I’m not moving forward is because
of me and that that self honesty that’s
not easy and let’s face it I have a
grade-a excuse to get out of pretty much
anything even the dishes if I want just
kidding no but you see I don’t allow
myself to use that because it’s the easy
way out and it’s that it’s that decency
that that not a decency that honesty
that have allowed me to move forward
that lets me live such a happy life we
all remember the power of looking under
the bed to find there were no monsters
it’s the same logic go look your monster
in the face the second thing is about
being able to separate your to extend
the superpower vision beyond yourself
and recognize when other people have
determined that your disability is part
of who you are this is what my parents
did when the doctor said he’ll never do
this he’ll never do that they separated
the doctors opinions of my disability
versus who I fundamentally was so you
can see throughout my life I’ve been
told I could never do something and yeah
sure that’s one outcome but that’s all
it is just one outcome there’s so many
other alternatives remember when you’d
associate the disability from who you
are you dictate the outcomes so you can
kind of use this as a fuel to prove
other people but more importantly prove
yourself wrong
sure it’s easy to give in it’s tempting
to want to just say oh I can’t do this
but that lets the disability win before
the fight even starts ask that question
in your own life how much of me not
moving forward is because of X reason
versus me just being afraid right
remember the monster under the bed so
now if you follow my points one and two
you separate yourself from your
disability and you separate other
people’s opinions about you as well
guess what you’re gonna fail ha no you
aren’t expecting that were you
but I mean I’m not I’m not selling you a
fairy tale here and I don’t mean you’re
going to fail completely I just mean
maybe the first couple of times
hopefully followed by some success may
be a great story for the grandchildren
maybe a lesson learned it’s important I
manage your expectations here I’ve
fallen a lot I know you’re not you’re
not just going to go out and get all
this success
I can promise you a couple of practice
runs and then hopefully some success so
I mentioned I noticed because I fail a
ton that’s because I have and there’s no
greater parallel to failing in life than
actually falling down I mean physically
falling down see the reality is when
somebody with CP we fall all the time
unless you’re in a wheelchair and we get
really good at it
but when you take an able body adult we
fall over our natural instinct is to get
up as quick as we can and oh that didn’t
happen
why do we do that usually it’s shame its
embarrassment because we’re expecting
we’re not supposed to fall over anymore
we’re grown adults and that’s our
problem is our expectation is just that
but when you take somebody with CP the
expectation is the opposite we fall all
the time and guess what we’re really
good at it we follow her like pros an
example of this an example of this is
when I’m holding my 10 month old niece
with both hands K without my arms I’m
very vulnerable to falling over okay
there’s all these other children running
throughout the house and I’m recognizing
that it’s only a matter of time before
the nieces and nephews decide they want
to tackle the uncle and so I decide you
know what I’m recognizing these are
signs that I might fall over so I’m
going to stand close to my my wife and
if I’ve not when I’ve not if I fall over
when I fall over I’m gonna pass this
child right off and guess what that’s
exactly what happened I was able to
pretty much predict and plan that I was
going to fall and I embraced it we can
do this exact same thing when we fail in
life embrace it it’s that simple just
embrace it sure get upset if it helps
get upset but here’s my top tip give
yourself anywhere from 10 minutes to two
days however long you want to give
yourself a time limit to be upset
go binge watch Netflix eat your favorite
ice cream but after that time is up move
on you see you can almost start to get
more comfortable with this idea of
failure the more it happens and you can
almost start to plan for it it’s kind of
a weird logic right but what’s your plan
for when you fail I’m not talking about
your plan B I’m talking about your plan
your plan is how you are going to fail
with grace AB recent mentor of mine put
it this way if I have a fallback plan it
means I’m going to
we expect to fail it becomes a lot
easier to embrace when it knocks on our
front door our fears our inhibitions and
our doubts they do not dictate the
outcome they do not dictate who we are
we do maybe you’re just afraid you’re
actually going to succeed I don’t know
but what I do know is that you paint the
picture of who you are not anybody else
I’m going to leave you with this when we
determine how we are going to fall with
grace and we choose how we want to hit
the ground you may actually find that
the view from the landing is a far
better view than the one from which you
are standing thank
you
Wow
Wow I haven’t even started yet Wow
hello everyone before I do get started I
wanted to address the elephant in the
room I know what a lot of you may have
been thinking when you saw me walk
across the stage and it’s fine I get it
all the time uh so here it is no I’m not
single sorry sorry sorry
[Applause]
Wow no I’m glad we I’m glad we got that
one off our chest all right now we can
now we can get gone right now what you
may not have noticed is I have a
physical disability called cerebral
palsy for those of you who do not know
what that is cerebral palsy is a
condition that is marked by impaired
muscle coordination and/or other
disabilities typically caused by brain
damage before or at birth thankfully for
me it really only affects my right leg
so when I was 22 months old my parents
took me to the doctor to find out why
this wasn’t happening like why you know
I I’m not the oldest in the family and
they wanted to know why and the doctor
examined me and said oh your son has CP
oh sorry um CP is is this missing
explained that he explained the
condition and then he basically told my
parents that I would never run I would
never walk jump swim climb ride a bike
name it basically anything physically
fun so my parents were shocked at this
news that they now have a son with a
disability this is going to be a new
challenge for the family right but as
they got on the elevator to leave the
office my dad turns to my mom and he
says no my son will do all of those
things and I have seven surgeries later
I can run I can walk I can jump swim
climb I can even ride a bike for about
ten seconds before it all just kind of
goes
right but I I don’t want to make it
sound like it’s a walk in the park it’s
been really hard I fall over all of the
time ten years ago I was falling several
times a day now I fall maybe two to
three times a week my grandpa taught me
a very important lesson he would always
tell me when I was little he’d say
Matthew your disability is just a
nuisance your CP is just a nuisance
that’s all it is sudden he’d say and
he’d put me in a headlock and he dig his
tooth to my forehead he teased me just
like grandpa’s tease your grandchildren
me just like every one of the other
grandchildren in the family the impact
of that sentence on my life is
indescribable what my parents and my
grandpa were trying to teach me was that
CP for me was a nuisance but it wasn’t
me it wasn’t a part of my character my
personality or who I fundamentally was
it didn’t get to dictate outcomes it was
simply the context within which I’d of
my life so here’s my question how many
of us have our own disabilities we’ll
call them that we consider as part of
our character let’s remind ourselves the
definition of a disability a physical or
mental condition that limits one’s
movements senses or activities so that
condition or that disability could just
as easily be the belief that you don’t
think you’re good enough maybe you come
from a broken family maybe you didn’t
have the same opportunities as somebody
else whatever it is how have you allowed
that disability to become a part of your
character and more importantly how have
you allowed that disability to inhibit
what you really want to get out of life
so when we separate these obstacles or
these challenges from our character and
we consider them as nuisances we allow
ourselves to see more clearly who we
really are and that lets us dictate the
outcome not the disability so here are
some things that I’ve thought of that
have helped me to do too
separate the disability from my
character and move forward
the first is whenever I’m tempted to not
do something because I don’t think I’m
capable I have to ask myself Matthew how
much of this is the CP talking versus
just you how much of this is about fear
uncertainty and doubt basically if it’s
not about my right leg that I’m forced
to face up to the fact that the reason
that I’m not moving forward is because
of me and that that self honesty that’s
not easy and let’s face it I have a
grade-a excuse to get out of pretty much
anything even the dishes if I want just
kidding no but you see I don’t allow
myself to use that because it’s the easy
way out and it’s that it’s that decency
that that not a decency that honesty
that have allowed me to move forward
that lets me live such a happy life we
all remember the power of looking under
the bed to find there were no monsters
it’s the same logic go look your monster
in the face the second thing is about
being able to separate your to extend
the superpower vision beyond yourself
and recognize when other people have
determined that your disability is part
of who you are this is what my parents
did when the doctor said he’ll never do
this he’ll never do that they separated
the doctors opinions of my disability
versus who I fundamentally was so you
can see throughout my life I’ve been
told I could never do something and yeah
sure that’s one outcome but that’s all
it is just one outcome there’s so many
other alternatives remember when you’d
associate the disability from who you
are you dictate the outcomes so you can
kind of use this as a fuel to prove
other people but more importantly prove
yourself wrong
sure it’s easy to give in it’s tempting
to want to just say oh I can’t do this
but that lets the disability win before
the fight even starts ask that question
in your own life how much of me not
moving forward is because of X reason
versus me just being afraid right
remember the monster under the bed so
now if you follow my points one and two
you separate yourself from your
disability and you separate other
people’s opinions about you as well
guess what you’re gonna fail ha no you
aren’t expecting that were you
but I mean I’m not I’m not selling you a
fairy tale here and I don’t mean you’re
going to fail completely I just mean
maybe the first couple of times
hopefully followed by some success may
be a great story for the grandchildren
maybe a lesson learned it’s important I
manage your expectations here I’ve
fallen a lot I know you’re not you’re
not just going to go out and get all
this success
I can promise you a couple of practice
runs and then hopefully some success so
I mentioned I noticed because I fail a
ton that’s because I have and there’s no
greater parallel to failing in life than
actually falling down I mean physically
falling down see the reality is when
somebody with CP we fall all the time
unless you’re in a wheelchair and we get
really good at it
but when you take an able body adult we
fall over our natural instinct is to get
up as quick as we can and oh that didn’t
happen
why do we do that usually it’s shame its
embarrassment because we’re expecting
we’re not supposed to fall over anymore
we’re grown adults and that’s our
problem is our expectation is just that
but when you take somebody with CP the
expectation is the opposite we fall all
the time and guess what we’re really
good at it we follow her like pros an
example of this an example of this is
when I’m holding my 10 month old niece
with both hands K without my arms I’m
very vulnerable to falling over okay
there’s all these other children running
throughout the house and I’m recognizing
that it’s only a matter of time before
the nieces and nephews decide they want
to tackle the uncle and so I decide you
know what I’m recognizing these are
signs that I might fall over so I’m
going to stand close to my my wife and
if I’ve not when I’ve not if I fall over
when I fall over I’m gonna pass this
child right off and guess what that’s
exactly what happened I was able to
pretty much predict and plan that I was
going to fall and I embraced it we can
do this exact same thing when we fail in
life embrace it it’s that simple just
embrace it sure get upset if it helps
get upset but here’s my top tip give
yourself anywhere from 10 minutes to two
days however long you want to give
yourself a time limit to be upset
go binge watch Netflix eat your favorite
ice cream but after that time is up move
on you see you can almost start to get
more comfortable with this idea of
failure the more it happens and you can
almost start to plan for it it’s kind of
a weird logic right but what’s your plan
for when you fail I’m not talking about
your plan B I’m talking about your plan
your plan is how you are going to fail
with grace AB recent mentor of mine put
it this way if I have a fallback plan it
means I’m going to
we expect to fail it becomes a lot
easier to embrace when it knocks on our
front door our fears our inhibitions and
our doubts they do not dictate the
outcome they do not dictate who we are
we do maybe you’re just afraid you’re
actually going to succeed I don’t know
but what I do know is that you paint the
picture of who you are not anybody else
I’m going to leave you with this when we
determine how we are going to fall with
grace and we choose how we want to hit
the ground you may actually find that
the view from the landing is a far
better view than the one from which you
are standing thank
you
Please follow and like us: