they told me never to look in the mirror
not my first time at least but I did the
first time I tried cocaine I looked
between two fat pottery lines right into
my own eyes for a brief moment I saw the
woman in the mirror for who she truly
was a bright fiery soul beautiful
passionate and whole I blinked her away
i diverted my gaze and I took a deep
inhale I didn’t believe in her and for
three years I ignored her I buried her
under my rage in my grief and my
mistrust of men and my hatred of God for
abandoning me with late nights filled
with alcohol cocaine I created the
dramas that validated my beliefs that I
was unworthy people were not to be
trusted and life was against me the yoga
tradition says that if we do not live in
alignment with her highest purpose then
we will never truly be happy every
late-night escapades and hungover
morning to be further away from my
purpose my calling and to one sleepless
night I felt so overwhelmed in my
loneliness and my fear but I wept out
loud for help my tears suddenly stopped
I felt a wave of calm come over me and I
fell into a deep sleep in that moment
and experience the nature of my true
self that moment helps send me into a
new direction
six months later I left for the jungles
of Costa Rica to become a yoga teacher
Here I am
ten years later standing on stage at
TEDx Asheville I was so excited to be
selected as a speaker however my
excitement quickly faded into full-on
freakout like what if I screwed up what
did my talk wasn’t good enough what if I
wasn’t good enough long gone were the
days of using alcohol and cocaine to
cover up my fears instead I binge on
Netflix for about a week maybe a little
longer what I realized what I was doing
the first thing I did
to sit down and write the first thing I
did was to stick down breathe and
meditate I know what stress and drama
feels like after years of practice I
also know what it feels like to be
centered breath and meditation take me
to my calm steady Center where I can
align with my highest potential raising
consciousness is one of this year’s
themes for TEDx Asheville from a yogic
perspective we cannot raise
consciousness consciousness just is it
is the intelligence that makes life
happen and there’s never a lack of it
what is lacking however is our ability
to perceive consciousness and what we
need to raise is our awareness awareness
keeps us rooted in the present moment
can I not only be aware of what I’m
eating but how I am eating can I be
aware of my thoughts but also how those
thoughts make me feel can I be aware of
how I move from one place to another
from one activity to another when fully
aware life is experience from a calm
steady foundation it is from this
foundation that we align with and
connect an experience consciousness
consciousness could not be experienced
if we’re stuck in the past or worried
about the future consciousness could
only be experienced in the present
moment and there are many ways to avoid
being present to uncomfortable feelings
and to subdue stress maybe it’s alcohol
drugs TV food or perhaps it’s social
media retail therapy your to-do-list sex
exercise so think of a time when you
felt overwhelmed what did you do to
comfort yourself and how did that make
you feel stress illness anxious
repetitive thoughts distract us from who
we really are
now physics was not my strongest subject
in school but I do remember Ohm’s law
which states in its simplest terms that
when there is a lot of resistance energy
will not flow freely through an
electrical conductor and when resistance
is low energy will flow more freely so
think of your body
as a container or a conductor of energy
our negative emotions our negative
thoughts act as resistances to the flow
of energy and when we have a lot of
resistance we become more susceptible to
bodily disease and mental disease and
when there’s a lot of energy and it
flows better the better we feel the body
is a container in an archive of
everything we were born with and
everything we’ve experienced both the
yoga tradition and modern science
suggests that unprocessed emotions and
experiences are actually stored in the
body especially for the navel to the
pelvic floor so how many of you have a
junk drawer in your home okay you know
that one place where you store all the
things that you don’t know what to do
with and you’re not ready to let go of
well in the body or pelvic Bowl becomes
the place where we cram all of our
emotional junk memories carry powerful
feelings psychoanalysts have shown that
in order to avoid tapping into those
uncomfortable feelings people will
actually shorten the breath and limit it
to the chest
this keeps energy and awareness away
from what is stored in our pelvic junk
doors problem is junk drawer never gets
clean in fact it only gets Messier and
more full we expend so much energy
trying to contain and avoid the painful
memories and emotions that are in our
pelvic junk drawers that we have less
energy to really fully thrive from our
purpose to live our lives each of us has
a vagus nerve that runs from the
brainstem it wanders down through all
the organs in the body it ends in the
belly with filaments that extend down
into our pelvic floor our pelvic jump
doors and the vagus nerve is essential
for the functioning of all of our major
organs including the brain the heart the
liver the kidneys and the lungs when
activated the vagus nerve acts as a
brake pedal slowing down an
overstimulated nervous system guess what
every single breath you take
activates the vagus nerve the deeper the
more full the breath the more powerfully
activated the vagus nerve becomes
positively affecting Oregon Health deep
breathing through the nose also
stimulates the prefrontal cortex the
portion of the brain that is responsible
for higher mental functioning
decision-making self observation
language reasoning emotional control and
social interactions every hurricane has
a center and I the storm where things
are more calm deeper breathing patterns
take us into our calm steady center
where we can observe and witness the
obstacles and resistances that stand in
the way of us and our best selves
intentional breathing patterns help us
feel more connected to other people to
communicate more clearly to be less
reactive and less likely to be triggered
by life events and the breast supports
us and seeing what is inner pelvic junk
drawers immobilize the energy to help
clear it out so the breath is far more
powerful than drugs alcohol or a bag of
Oreos to steady you and unlike Oreos you
know and there’s other things the breath
has long lasting benefits that improve
over time so think about that for a
moment simply by learning to breathe
consciously you can positively impact
your long-term health and the quality of
your life a few years ago I was
struggling again I’d had another failed
relationship I was discontent in work
and I was suffering from chronic
migraines resistance was building in my
body and my mind were suffering even
though I was practicing the physical
postures of yoga regularly I wasn’t
practicing being aware or being present
I wasn’t practicing breath or meditation
consistently I was unsteady and
ungrounded
in my yoga practice during this time I
took a class that didn’t do any of the
rigorous physical postures I was
used to instead breathing techniques
were integrated with basic postures
throughout the entire class at the end
of the class I set up on that I was like
wow what was that
I felt more immediate changes in my body
in my mind and my emotions than I had
ever experienced before ever now I
didn’t get enlightenment from that one
class but it did heightened my awareness
I learned that there are so many
different breathing techniques to
support us with wherever we are in our
lives
and if we learn how to use these
techniques intelligently as a support
mechanism for greater health our lives
can change the yoga teachings are very
clear we must have a calm steady mind in
order to connect to consciousness the
unchanging essence of who we are but who
has time for one more thing you do media
kicks didn’t study that shows on average
we spend 50 minutes of our day on
Facebook alone if we were to include
YouTube Instagram snapchat and Twitter
into the mix it easily it extends into
over 2 hours of our day social media has
been shown to have detrimental effects
on our physical mental emotional and
even spiritual well-being so if we took
5 minutes 10 minutes maybe 15 minutes
and apply that time to techniques that
have known immediate and long-term
benefits on your mind body and spirit
life is full of choices we all get to
choose so let’s choose now sit up nice
and tall place your feet on the ground
and close your eyes take a nice deep
breath in through your nose and the next
do through your mouth let’s do that one
more time so breathe in and let it all
go
and then become aware of the sounds
around you feeling the sensation of your
clothing on your skin feeling the length
of your spine and then bring your
awareness to nose and feeling the breath
move in and out of each nostril the
coolness of the inhale and the warmth of
the exhale and then bring your awareness
to the back of your throat feeling a
subtle movement of breath at the back of
the throat and then bring your awareness
to your chest feel the rise in the fall
of the chest with each inhale and exhale
and can you begin to lengthen your
breath so that you feel the breath move
all the way down into your belly so when
you inhale you feel the belly soften and
expand and when you exhale you feel the
navel hug towards your spine so
breathing in the belly softens and
expands and breathing out the navel
moves towards your spine and begin to
create a rhythm of breath that is
reflective of how you would like your
mind and your body and your emotions to
be calm steady effortless
and can you begin to lengthen the breath
even more drawing it down deep into your
pelvic floor bringing breath and
awareness into your pelvic junk drawer
and when you breathe in drawing in
nurturance in ease when you breathe out
releasing stress and anxiety
breathing in revitalization bring it out
fears and old stories so breathing in
what you need and letting go of what you
do not but it becomes effortless to
breathe in what you need and to let go
of what you do not
and then shift your awareness to the
center of your heart the place behind
your breastbone in front of your spine
and sends a quality of stillness in the
center of your spiritual heart the place
where the essence of who you really are
resides that which is always calm and
steady and peaceful I mean bow your head
down just slightly it’s a gesture of
releasing the mind and to the wisdom
that lies within your own heart take a
deeper breath in and out
feeling the clothing on your skin the
length of your spine and then lift your
head open your eyes and just notice
where you are in this moment and your
body and your mind and your emotions
after only a few short minutes of breath
and awareness sufi ism uses the analogy
of the human heart as a polished mirror
that reflects the light of our highest
self or highest potential
unfortunately the mirrors of our hearts
are often covered with the grime and the
dust of our suffering or blame or shame
or regrets or anger the breath helps us
begin the process of clearing that away
today I no longer divert my gaze and
breathe in a drug that helps me avoid my
emotional junk instead I use the breath
to steady me take me in word where I
find the courage to uncover and bear
witness to my pain when I clear out the
clutter I discover underneath inherent
joy beauty
strength I can look directly into the
mirror of my heart see myself clearly
take a deep inhale and breathe in life
spiritual teachers have taught for
millennia that if we want to change the
outer world we must go inward if you’re
willing to take the journey to greater
self knowing and healing the simplest
most powerful tool you will ever find is
the breath
you
not my first time at least but I did the
first time I tried cocaine I looked
between two fat pottery lines right into
my own eyes for a brief moment I saw the
woman in the mirror for who she truly
was a bright fiery soul beautiful
passionate and whole I blinked her away
i diverted my gaze and I took a deep
inhale I didn’t believe in her and for
three years I ignored her I buried her
under my rage in my grief and my
mistrust of men and my hatred of God for
abandoning me with late nights filled
with alcohol cocaine I created the
dramas that validated my beliefs that I
was unworthy people were not to be
trusted and life was against me the yoga
tradition says that if we do not live in
alignment with her highest purpose then
we will never truly be happy every
late-night escapades and hungover
morning to be further away from my
purpose my calling and to one sleepless
night I felt so overwhelmed in my
loneliness and my fear but I wept out
loud for help my tears suddenly stopped
I felt a wave of calm come over me and I
fell into a deep sleep in that moment
and experience the nature of my true
self that moment helps send me into a
new direction
six months later I left for the jungles
of Costa Rica to become a yoga teacher
Here I am
ten years later standing on stage at
TEDx Asheville I was so excited to be
selected as a speaker however my
excitement quickly faded into full-on
freakout like what if I screwed up what
did my talk wasn’t good enough what if I
wasn’t good enough long gone were the
days of using alcohol and cocaine to
cover up my fears instead I binge on
Netflix for about a week maybe a little
longer what I realized what I was doing
the first thing I did
to sit down and write the first thing I
did was to stick down breathe and
meditate I know what stress and drama
feels like after years of practice I
also know what it feels like to be
centered breath and meditation take me
to my calm steady Center where I can
align with my highest potential raising
consciousness is one of this year’s
themes for TEDx Asheville from a yogic
perspective we cannot raise
consciousness consciousness just is it
is the intelligence that makes life
happen and there’s never a lack of it
what is lacking however is our ability
to perceive consciousness and what we
need to raise is our awareness awareness
keeps us rooted in the present moment
can I not only be aware of what I’m
eating but how I am eating can I be
aware of my thoughts but also how those
thoughts make me feel can I be aware of
how I move from one place to another
from one activity to another when fully
aware life is experience from a calm
steady foundation it is from this
foundation that we align with and
connect an experience consciousness
consciousness could not be experienced
if we’re stuck in the past or worried
about the future consciousness could
only be experienced in the present
moment and there are many ways to avoid
being present to uncomfortable feelings
and to subdue stress maybe it’s alcohol
drugs TV food or perhaps it’s social
media retail therapy your to-do-list sex
exercise so think of a time when you
felt overwhelmed what did you do to
comfort yourself and how did that make
you feel stress illness anxious
repetitive thoughts distract us from who
we really are
now physics was not my strongest subject
in school but I do remember Ohm’s law
which states in its simplest terms that
when there is a lot of resistance energy
will not flow freely through an
electrical conductor and when resistance
is low energy will flow more freely so
think of your body
as a container or a conductor of energy
our negative emotions our negative
thoughts act as resistances to the flow
of energy and when we have a lot of
resistance we become more susceptible to
bodily disease and mental disease and
when there’s a lot of energy and it
flows better the better we feel the body
is a container in an archive of
everything we were born with and
everything we’ve experienced both the
yoga tradition and modern science
suggests that unprocessed emotions and
experiences are actually stored in the
body especially for the navel to the
pelvic floor so how many of you have a
junk drawer in your home okay you know
that one place where you store all the
things that you don’t know what to do
with and you’re not ready to let go of
well in the body or pelvic Bowl becomes
the place where we cram all of our
emotional junk memories carry powerful
feelings psychoanalysts have shown that
in order to avoid tapping into those
uncomfortable feelings people will
actually shorten the breath and limit it
to the chest
this keeps energy and awareness away
from what is stored in our pelvic junk
doors problem is junk drawer never gets
clean in fact it only gets Messier and
more full we expend so much energy
trying to contain and avoid the painful
memories and emotions that are in our
pelvic junk drawers that we have less
energy to really fully thrive from our
purpose to live our lives each of us has
a vagus nerve that runs from the
brainstem it wanders down through all
the organs in the body it ends in the
belly with filaments that extend down
into our pelvic floor our pelvic jump
doors and the vagus nerve is essential
for the functioning of all of our major
organs including the brain the heart the
liver the kidneys and the lungs when
activated the vagus nerve acts as a
brake pedal slowing down an
overstimulated nervous system guess what
every single breath you take
activates the vagus nerve the deeper the
more full the breath the more powerfully
activated the vagus nerve becomes
positively affecting Oregon Health deep
breathing through the nose also
stimulates the prefrontal cortex the
portion of the brain that is responsible
for higher mental functioning
decision-making self observation
language reasoning emotional control and
social interactions every hurricane has
a center and I the storm where things
are more calm deeper breathing patterns
take us into our calm steady center
where we can observe and witness the
obstacles and resistances that stand in
the way of us and our best selves
intentional breathing patterns help us
feel more connected to other people to
communicate more clearly to be less
reactive and less likely to be triggered
by life events and the breast supports
us and seeing what is inner pelvic junk
drawers immobilize the energy to help
clear it out so the breath is far more
powerful than drugs alcohol or a bag of
Oreos to steady you and unlike Oreos you
know and there’s other things the breath
has long lasting benefits that improve
over time so think about that for a
moment simply by learning to breathe
consciously you can positively impact
your long-term health and the quality of
your life a few years ago I was
struggling again I’d had another failed
relationship I was discontent in work
and I was suffering from chronic
migraines resistance was building in my
body and my mind were suffering even
though I was practicing the physical
postures of yoga regularly I wasn’t
practicing being aware or being present
I wasn’t practicing breath or meditation
consistently I was unsteady and
ungrounded
in my yoga practice during this time I
took a class that didn’t do any of the
rigorous physical postures I was
used to instead breathing techniques
were integrated with basic postures
throughout the entire class at the end
of the class I set up on that I was like
wow what was that
I felt more immediate changes in my body
in my mind and my emotions than I had
ever experienced before ever now I
didn’t get enlightenment from that one
class but it did heightened my awareness
I learned that there are so many
different breathing techniques to
support us with wherever we are in our
lives
and if we learn how to use these
techniques intelligently as a support
mechanism for greater health our lives
can change the yoga teachings are very
clear we must have a calm steady mind in
order to connect to consciousness the
unchanging essence of who we are but who
has time for one more thing you do media
kicks didn’t study that shows on average
we spend 50 minutes of our day on
Facebook alone if we were to include
YouTube Instagram snapchat and Twitter
into the mix it easily it extends into
over 2 hours of our day social media has
been shown to have detrimental effects
on our physical mental emotional and
even spiritual well-being so if we took
5 minutes 10 minutes maybe 15 minutes
and apply that time to techniques that
have known immediate and long-term
benefits on your mind body and spirit
life is full of choices we all get to
choose so let’s choose now sit up nice
and tall place your feet on the ground
and close your eyes take a nice deep
breath in through your nose and the next
do through your mouth let’s do that one
more time so breathe in and let it all
go
and then become aware of the sounds
around you feeling the sensation of your
clothing on your skin feeling the length
of your spine and then bring your
awareness to nose and feeling the breath
move in and out of each nostril the
coolness of the inhale and the warmth of
the exhale and then bring your awareness
to the back of your throat feeling a
subtle movement of breath at the back of
the throat and then bring your awareness
to your chest feel the rise in the fall
of the chest with each inhale and exhale
and can you begin to lengthen your
breath so that you feel the breath move
all the way down into your belly so when
you inhale you feel the belly soften and
expand and when you exhale you feel the
navel hug towards your spine so
breathing in the belly softens and
expands and breathing out the navel
moves towards your spine and begin to
create a rhythm of breath that is
reflective of how you would like your
mind and your body and your emotions to
be calm steady effortless
and can you begin to lengthen the breath
even more drawing it down deep into your
pelvic floor bringing breath and
awareness into your pelvic junk drawer
and when you breathe in drawing in
nurturance in ease when you breathe out
releasing stress and anxiety
breathing in revitalization bring it out
fears and old stories so breathing in
what you need and letting go of what you
do not but it becomes effortless to
breathe in what you need and to let go
of what you do not
and then shift your awareness to the
center of your heart the place behind
your breastbone in front of your spine
and sends a quality of stillness in the
center of your spiritual heart the place
where the essence of who you really are
resides that which is always calm and
steady and peaceful I mean bow your head
down just slightly it’s a gesture of
releasing the mind and to the wisdom
that lies within your own heart take a
deeper breath in and out
feeling the clothing on your skin the
length of your spine and then lift your
head open your eyes and just notice
where you are in this moment and your
body and your mind and your emotions
after only a few short minutes of breath
and awareness sufi ism uses the analogy
of the human heart as a polished mirror
that reflects the light of our highest
self or highest potential
unfortunately the mirrors of our hearts
are often covered with the grime and the
dust of our suffering or blame or shame
or regrets or anger the breath helps us
begin the process of clearing that away
today I no longer divert my gaze and
breathe in a drug that helps me avoid my
emotional junk instead I use the breath
to steady me take me in word where I
find the courage to uncover and bear
witness to my pain when I clear out the
clutter I discover underneath inherent
joy beauty
strength I can look directly into the
mirror of my heart see myself clearly
take a deep inhale and breathe in life
spiritual teachers have taught for
millennia that if we want to change the
outer world we must go inward if you’re
willing to take the journey to greater
self knowing and healing the simplest
most powerful tool you will ever find is
the breath
you
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