to mean and ugly stepsisters could not
stop beautiful Cinderella from marrying
the handsome prince from the faraway
Kingdom my dear friends don’t we wish
that everything in life like a fairy
tale
had a happy ending I’m sure each one of
you had a favorite fairy tale when
growing up the men in this room can deny
that as much as they want when I was
growing up I dreamed that I was pretty
and dainty with smooth flawless skin
like Cinderella
my prince was told dark handsome isn’t
that what Derek said as my imagination
ran wild I pictured him riding on a
white horse sweeping me off my feet and
handing me a single red rose fiction is
powerful stuff it transports you into an
imaginary exhilarating world but what if
what if your brain shuts out reality
some years ago I met Kareem Kareem was
tall and handsome he could be darker he
did not even own a cat so white horse
was out of course as for the romantic
trait in Korean in my perspective this
weighed less than a gram he certainly
was not the type to walk through the
bushes and prick his finger just to pick
me arose even as I hated him for not
mirroring my prince charming
something sparked and we started to date
one evening
we were sitting in the car parked
outside his house deep in discussion
when suddenly we heard a tap on the
window startled we looked up and to our
horror we saw a man with a gun the rest
happened at the speed of light Curran
put the gear into reverse and slammed on
the accelerator but just as he fired a
shot the bullet smashed through the
window shattered the glass and ripped
through Kareem’s shoulder at that moment
as I saw blood oozing through the window
through the wound it hit me like
thunderbolt
that I loved him and I could not bear to
lose him ladies and gentlemen it took a
horrific incident for me to change my
perspective of carim by refocusing my
lens I was able to see him for the
person he was and not the fairytale
image that I had edged in my head after
all what he possibly lacked in romance
he more than made up in dependability
and strength of character what more
would I want in a partner fast forward
to today param and I have been married
for 20 years
even without the white horse
we are happy but with someone please
tell him that I’m still waiting for my
red rose could you be missing out on
beautiful opportunities because of your
perspective perhaps it is time to
refocus your lens I hope it will not
require a traumatic or a horrific
incident like mine for you to do so
now it doesn’t take a genius to see
beyond those fairy tales but there is a
tricky fellow that tricky fellow is
called the half truth the half truth is
not a truth they are generalizations
they are misinformation disinformation
that appear like gospel why because the
majority thinks so it is very important
to see life through a lens that gives
you a true perspective today I wish to
share with you how change is in
perspective in three different stages of
my life have shaped the person I am I
hope they will help you review your own
life because sometimes it only takes a
small shift in perspective to transform
your life the first has to do with my
birth a drive from here to the slopes of
Mount Kenya will take you past the
village I was born but alas it is not a
village anymore you know it as the
bustling county called moranga my
parents wanted and planned for three
children I was the fourth man proposes
God disposes I was clearly the unplanned
one it is say that unwanted children
grew up deprived of love my neighbor
Simon quinoa was one such unwanted child
he was born two years before me and was
overtly unloved by his parents Simon
took to drugs and alcohol at the age of
nine and he tragically took his own life
when he was only 19
our entire village was devastated and up
until today on July 26th I light a
candle in my house in memory of Simon
well my birth too was unplanned my
parents have never made me feel unwanted
on the contrary they saw my unscheduled
entry as a surprise gift when was the
last time you received a surprise gift
wasn’t that a wonderful feeling perhaps
that is why we wait for Christmas
because we are waiting for those
surprise gifts and because of that I
have been fortunate have been showered
with love throughout my life and this
has helped me form healthy relationships
with my village mates with my siblings
with my spouse with my son with many
here in this room you my friends two
different lives two different paths all
because of different perspectives but I
ask you is an unwanted child a blessing
or a burden it is all about perspective
the second stage has to do with my
career well women have made great
strides and we heard Alex the gender gap
remains wide in the workplace
gender-based stereotypes continue to be
an obstacle to women especially as their
path or in their journey towards the
topmost rungs of the corporate ladder
hidden barriers popularly known as the
glass ceiling come in the way it is
perhaps a given that women are unable to
progress because of this but you may be
thinking I’m about to claim that this is
fiction it is not published research has
shown that globally only 9% of the CEOs
and managing directors are women the
statistics in Kenya are even less fact
is that the odds for a woman to rise to
the number-one position are pretty slim
even if she’s pretty and slim
consciously you might hear of a woman
suddenly and surprisingly promoted to
the position of head honcho for firm but
be very careful when that happens
because she is being prepared to fail
and take the rap a phenomenon they call
the glass cliff for 20 years
blood sweat and tears helped me in my
career at Domas group of companies I
progressed from the ranks from the
position of personal assistant to the
managing director to a human resource
assistant then to a human resource
manager I went on to the position of
human resource director and chief
financial officer I knew then that I had
reached my peak and I could not aim any
higher there were two reasons for this
one I am a woman and two I am short so
when the position of Managing Director
of demands coffee became vacant I did
not even think to apply ironically it
was my boss and mentor over the years
who proposed who challenged me to take
the post it struck me then that it is in
our DNA to simply
the perspective of the majority I had
become so blind to the glass ceiling
phenomena that I was not seeing the
opportunities that were mine to grab I
had so subscribed to it today for years
on as managing director of dolmens
coffee I look back with pride and
gratitude at the goals attained which
previously I thought were unattainable
and I look forward to climbing greater
heights
what perspectives might be limiting you
but fact is that the statistics for
women in leadership remain ugly but we
are in a changing world where the past
or the present or combined must not
equal to the future recent studies have
shown that there’s a positive
correlation ship between a firm’s
increase in profitability and women on
the board yet despite this uncelebrated
heroes like my boss are far and few we
must all do our part to also shift
perspectives and change the narrative we
have a responsibility to write a new and
more equitable statistic do remember
that sometimes a shift in perspective
can make the impossible possible
the third stage that I’m going to talk
about touches on the meaning of life and
my perspective on put my purpose in life
all my childhood fairytales ended with
and they lived happily ever after
can we really live happily ever after in
this world according to Viktor Frankl a
renowned neurologists psychologists and
offer you cannot pursue happiness it
must ensue Viktor Frankl was the
Holocaust survivor and in his
best-selling his best-selling book man’s
search for meaning chronicles how during
his time as an inmate in a concentration
camp the circumstances were horrific
they were traumatic they were tragic and
he describes how he searched really hard
for a positive purpose to live well I
submit that while his circumstances may
have been extreme harsh your and my
search is no different as human beings
we are constantly striving to have
meaning and significance in our lives we
want to feel we are important we want to
feel we are useful we want to feel we
are making an impact and contributing to
something bigger but how do we find
meaning in our lives how do we find that
purpose many have such high and low
people have moved jobs they have moved
cities left partners despaired gone
through illnesses succumbed to death
even as they start feeling that they’re
leaving meaningless and unfocused full
lives a few years ago perhaps around the
time when I was not able to aim any
higher I too went through a phase where
I was feeling extremely unfulfilled I
had been working task after task in what
I felt was just a job just to get the
money out of it I just was feeling
completely unfulfilled I was over 40 and
had spent about half my life at this job
now I bet as you’re listening to me
you’re beginning to calculate my age I
must caution you a woman’s age is
very personal suffice it to say that I’m
over 40 and my wife’s counsel today if
assuming wisdom comes with age is that
seemingly elusive purpose is actually
very close to you in this rainy weather
it is like that mosquito when you’re
sleeping comes buzzing near your ears
you go to swat it you miss you go back
to sleep
[Music]
you miss again you go back to slip what
happens
[Music]
so finally you get up switch on the
light but the further you look the
harder it is to reach you can only NAB
it when it is close to you
similarly your purpose is more likely to
be found close to where you are and
doing what you know best at Romans our
job is to delight your taste buds with
that heavenly brewery called Romans
coffee today it is with the help of my
customers and my wonderful team that I
have been able to find meaning in my
work because I realized the impact we
are making and this newfound meaning has
injected energy in me it’s given me
fulfillment and satisfaction and I
submit that if we all tried to find
meaning in our workplaces after all
every organization every enterprise
every business was formed to fulfill a
need and if you can find the impact that
you can make together we can all serve
society so much better this said it
would be a mistake to believe that there
is only a single formula to living a
purposeful life life has no promise
there is no permanency change is
inevitable and if work can only work
becomes your sole purpose then
retirement is sure to be the beginning
of a slow death life has so many
compartments so the idea is to find
meaning in all you do try and create an
impact in everything you do just like
the hero of your story if your life were
to be played back to you as a movie
would you come out as the hero of your
story
ladies and gentlemen through my
experiences you will have seen that I’ve
been fortunate to have been the
beneficiary of the right perspective
through individuals in my life who have
fueled the wind beneath my wings and
indeed sometimes the change in
perspective will be propelled by
individuals by an incidence by change in
circumstances but it would be foolhardy
to assume this will always happen you
must be deliberate the next time you are
confronted with the challenge or even an
opportunity faced with an opportunity or
need to make a decision step back
disconnect from all that technology
around you reconnect with yourself
question your assumptions your beliefs
and your biases learn to challenge those
unhelpful limiting and even damaging
perceptions fortunately just like this
cube has many sides to it most
situations in life have many
perspectives let’s consider Cinderella
did Cinderella only married the prince
because she had a pretty face were the
two horrible sisters only horrible
because they were ugly
could the two horrible sisters live
happily ever after good Prince Charming
perhaps have been a bad guy
reflect upon the possibilities and
self-reflection is extremely humbling
but I challenge you today recognize that
perspective that works for you and let
it help you write a new narrative that
will chart a new shape to your life
[Applause]
stop beautiful Cinderella from marrying
the handsome prince from the faraway
Kingdom my dear friends don’t we wish
that everything in life like a fairy
tale
had a happy ending I’m sure each one of
you had a favorite fairy tale when
growing up the men in this room can deny
that as much as they want when I was
growing up I dreamed that I was pretty
and dainty with smooth flawless skin
like Cinderella
my prince was told dark handsome isn’t
that what Derek said as my imagination
ran wild I pictured him riding on a
white horse sweeping me off my feet and
handing me a single red rose fiction is
powerful stuff it transports you into an
imaginary exhilarating world but what if
what if your brain shuts out reality
some years ago I met Kareem Kareem was
tall and handsome he could be darker he
did not even own a cat so white horse
was out of course as for the romantic
trait in Korean in my perspective this
weighed less than a gram he certainly
was not the type to walk through the
bushes and prick his finger just to pick
me arose even as I hated him for not
mirroring my prince charming
something sparked and we started to date
one evening
we were sitting in the car parked
outside his house deep in discussion
when suddenly we heard a tap on the
window startled we looked up and to our
horror we saw a man with a gun the rest
happened at the speed of light Curran
put the gear into reverse and slammed on
the accelerator but just as he fired a
shot the bullet smashed through the
window shattered the glass and ripped
through Kareem’s shoulder at that moment
as I saw blood oozing through the window
through the wound it hit me like
thunderbolt
that I loved him and I could not bear to
lose him ladies and gentlemen it took a
horrific incident for me to change my
perspective of carim by refocusing my
lens I was able to see him for the
person he was and not the fairytale
image that I had edged in my head after
all what he possibly lacked in romance
he more than made up in dependability
and strength of character what more
would I want in a partner fast forward
to today param and I have been married
for 20 years
even without the white horse
we are happy but with someone please
tell him that I’m still waiting for my
red rose could you be missing out on
beautiful opportunities because of your
perspective perhaps it is time to
refocus your lens I hope it will not
require a traumatic or a horrific
incident like mine for you to do so
now it doesn’t take a genius to see
beyond those fairy tales but there is a
tricky fellow that tricky fellow is
called the half truth the half truth is
not a truth they are generalizations
they are misinformation disinformation
that appear like gospel why because the
majority thinks so it is very important
to see life through a lens that gives
you a true perspective today I wish to
share with you how change is in
perspective in three different stages of
my life have shaped the person I am I
hope they will help you review your own
life because sometimes it only takes a
small shift in perspective to transform
your life the first has to do with my
birth a drive from here to the slopes of
Mount Kenya will take you past the
village I was born but alas it is not a
village anymore you know it as the
bustling county called moranga my
parents wanted and planned for three
children I was the fourth man proposes
God disposes I was clearly the unplanned
one it is say that unwanted children
grew up deprived of love my neighbor
Simon quinoa was one such unwanted child
he was born two years before me and was
overtly unloved by his parents Simon
took to drugs and alcohol at the age of
nine and he tragically took his own life
when he was only 19
our entire village was devastated and up
until today on July 26th I light a
candle in my house in memory of Simon
well my birth too was unplanned my
parents have never made me feel unwanted
on the contrary they saw my unscheduled
entry as a surprise gift when was the
last time you received a surprise gift
wasn’t that a wonderful feeling perhaps
that is why we wait for Christmas
because we are waiting for those
surprise gifts and because of that I
have been fortunate have been showered
with love throughout my life and this
has helped me form healthy relationships
with my village mates with my siblings
with my spouse with my son with many
here in this room you my friends two
different lives two different paths all
because of different perspectives but I
ask you is an unwanted child a blessing
or a burden it is all about perspective
the second stage has to do with my
career well women have made great
strides and we heard Alex the gender gap
remains wide in the workplace
gender-based stereotypes continue to be
an obstacle to women especially as their
path or in their journey towards the
topmost rungs of the corporate ladder
hidden barriers popularly known as the
glass ceiling come in the way it is
perhaps a given that women are unable to
progress because of this but you may be
thinking I’m about to claim that this is
fiction it is not published research has
shown that globally only 9% of the CEOs
and managing directors are women the
statistics in Kenya are even less fact
is that the odds for a woman to rise to
the number-one position are pretty slim
even if she’s pretty and slim
consciously you might hear of a woman
suddenly and surprisingly promoted to
the position of head honcho for firm but
be very careful when that happens
because she is being prepared to fail
and take the rap a phenomenon they call
the glass cliff for 20 years
blood sweat and tears helped me in my
career at Domas group of companies I
progressed from the ranks from the
position of personal assistant to the
managing director to a human resource
assistant then to a human resource
manager I went on to the position of
human resource director and chief
financial officer I knew then that I had
reached my peak and I could not aim any
higher there were two reasons for this
one I am a woman and two I am short so
when the position of Managing Director
of demands coffee became vacant I did
not even think to apply ironically it
was my boss and mentor over the years
who proposed who challenged me to take
the post it struck me then that it is in
our DNA to simply
the perspective of the majority I had
become so blind to the glass ceiling
phenomena that I was not seeing the
opportunities that were mine to grab I
had so subscribed to it today for years
on as managing director of dolmens
coffee I look back with pride and
gratitude at the goals attained which
previously I thought were unattainable
and I look forward to climbing greater
heights
what perspectives might be limiting you
but fact is that the statistics for
women in leadership remain ugly but we
are in a changing world where the past
or the present or combined must not
equal to the future recent studies have
shown that there’s a positive
correlation ship between a firm’s
increase in profitability and women on
the board yet despite this uncelebrated
heroes like my boss are far and few we
must all do our part to also shift
perspectives and change the narrative we
have a responsibility to write a new and
more equitable statistic do remember
that sometimes a shift in perspective
can make the impossible possible
the third stage that I’m going to talk
about touches on the meaning of life and
my perspective on put my purpose in life
all my childhood fairytales ended with
and they lived happily ever after
can we really live happily ever after in
this world according to Viktor Frankl a
renowned neurologists psychologists and
offer you cannot pursue happiness it
must ensue Viktor Frankl was the
Holocaust survivor and in his
best-selling his best-selling book man’s
search for meaning chronicles how during
his time as an inmate in a concentration
camp the circumstances were horrific
they were traumatic they were tragic and
he describes how he searched really hard
for a positive purpose to live well I
submit that while his circumstances may
have been extreme harsh your and my
search is no different as human beings
we are constantly striving to have
meaning and significance in our lives we
want to feel we are important we want to
feel we are useful we want to feel we
are making an impact and contributing to
something bigger but how do we find
meaning in our lives how do we find that
purpose many have such high and low
people have moved jobs they have moved
cities left partners despaired gone
through illnesses succumbed to death
even as they start feeling that they’re
leaving meaningless and unfocused full
lives a few years ago perhaps around the
time when I was not able to aim any
higher I too went through a phase where
I was feeling extremely unfulfilled I
had been working task after task in what
I felt was just a job just to get the
money out of it I just was feeling
completely unfulfilled I was over 40 and
had spent about half my life at this job
now I bet as you’re listening to me
you’re beginning to calculate my age I
must caution you a woman’s age is
very personal suffice it to say that I’m
over 40 and my wife’s counsel today if
assuming wisdom comes with age is that
seemingly elusive purpose is actually
very close to you in this rainy weather
it is like that mosquito when you’re
sleeping comes buzzing near your ears
you go to swat it you miss you go back
to sleep
[Music]
you miss again you go back to slip what
happens
[Music]
so finally you get up switch on the
light but the further you look the
harder it is to reach you can only NAB
it when it is close to you
similarly your purpose is more likely to
be found close to where you are and
doing what you know best at Romans our
job is to delight your taste buds with
that heavenly brewery called Romans
coffee today it is with the help of my
customers and my wonderful team that I
have been able to find meaning in my
work because I realized the impact we
are making and this newfound meaning has
injected energy in me it’s given me
fulfillment and satisfaction and I
submit that if we all tried to find
meaning in our workplaces after all
every organization every enterprise
every business was formed to fulfill a
need and if you can find the impact that
you can make together we can all serve
society so much better this said it
would be a mistake to believe that there
is only a single formula to living a
purposeful life life has no promise
there is no permanency change is
inevitable and if work can only work
becomes your sole purpose then
retirement is sure to be the beginning
of a slow death life has so many
compartments so the idea is to find
meaning in all you do try and create an
impact in everything you do just like
the hero of your story if your life were
to be played back to you as a movie
would you come out as the hero of your
story
ladies and gentlemen through my
experiences you will have seen that I’ve
been fortunate to have been the
beneficiary of the right perspective
through individuals in my life who have
fueled the wind beneath my wings and
indeed sometimes the change in
perspective will be propelled by
individuals by an incidence by change in
circumstances but it would be foolhardy
to assume this will always happen you
must be deliberate the next time you are
confronted with the challenge or even an
opportunity faced with an opportunity or
need to make a decision step back
disconnect from all that technology
around you reconnect with yourself
question your assumptions your beliefs
and your biases learn to challenge those
unhelpful limiting and even damaging
perceptions fortunately just like this
cube has many sides to it most
situations in life have many
perspectives let’s consider Cinderella
did Cinderella only married the prince
because she had a pretty face were the
two horrible sisters only horrible
because they were ugly
could the two horrible sisters live
happily ever after good Prince Charming
perhaps have been a bad guy
reflect upon the possibilities and
self-reflection is extremely humbling
but I challenge you today recognize that
perspective that works for you and let
it help you write a new narrative that
will chart a new shape to your life
[Applause]
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