all of us are going to die someday right
now we are working towards our futures
we are not thinking about our final days
we don’t want to dwell upon the fact
that just as we are born dependent we
will likely die as such in the loving
arms of those that care for us if we’re
lucky at least if we’re lucky we will
meet our end a long time from now
surrounded by caring hands who help us
do for us the things we could once do
for ourselves I want to ask you today
how you want to face death so that you
will help be a part of the solution that
is the dark side of caregiving otherwise
known as elder abuse a fate that affects
one in 10 seniors every year my father’s
mom was vivacious and thriving until she
suffered a stroke when she was moved
into a nursing home to be cared for she
became upset about her lack of
independence her decline in health and
mental state was obvious but no matter
what my family did we were unable to
improve her condition her nurses brushed
it off as nothing more than the aging
process one day she called my father and
begged him to get her out of there she
had witnessed something horrible in the
hallway outside of her room a friend of
hers had slipped and fallen laid on the
ground for hours before being helped she
even described a nurse stepping over the
woman saying you’re not on my service
and I’m not going to help you this story
was verified by my grandmother’s
roommate but their case against the
nurses never saw the light of day
because no one believes the old and
senile the National Council on Aging
estimates that for every one case of
elder abuse 14 more go unreported
similar to my Graham’s situation this is
because oftentimes the witnesses are the
elderly themselves and their words stand
very small compared to those of an able
minded young adult there’s a stigma here
that I’d like to draw attention to
ageism when because of your old age you
are suddenly deemed unable to make
cognizant decisions and your wishes are
disregarded
according to the best available
estimates between one and two million
Americans age 65 or older have been
injured exploited or otherwise
mistreated by someone whom they depended
for care or protection the neglect in
this particular nursing home would later
cause another injury and this one would
result in a death the death of someone
that I cared about my grandmother who
was not supposed to be out of bed on her
own slipped in the hallway hit her head
and this caused her to go into a coma
before she passed away in ancient times
the elderly were revered as the wisest
and most valuable members of our society
today when family members are no longer
able to care for their elderly they are
placed in care homes where they are
subject to high chances of abuse and
neglect in which the living conditions
themselves are often below what the
already low standard is just like
technology we’ve become entrapped in
having the best and latest model whether
it be our phones our cars or our
clothing we have created a society that
relies on instant gratification and easy
fixes to our problems the creation of
nursing homes retirement homes and other
care homes were originally designed with
good intentions and as an easy fix to
the problem of our aging parents while
they still hold a positive mission
statement they rarely live up to those
promises when you google search the term
elderly the first adjusted search item
is abuse when you follow that very
search you get a google definition of
what that is but only after about four
different ads for law offices and
attorneys to see if there’s a case to be
made and for good reason there’s big
money in elder abuse cases one of the
biggest names in senior living in the
United States reached a 1 million dollar
settlement in February of 2016 for elder
abuse and a wrongful death another 13
million dollar lawsuit was reached a
year prior for the same company
recently another lawsuit was filed
against that same corporation because an
88 year old dementia patient in Michigan
walked out of an unlocked back door
where she slipped and fell could not
gain reentry and froze to death outside
overnight these big-name corporations
are known for spending millions of
dollars covering up the abuse cases so
their potential customers won’t know
that they are truly failing at providing
quality health care so my question is
why is this corporation in business and
more importantly why don’t they stop
putting the money into covering up the
abuse and rather put that money into
better care so the abuse can stop in the
first place a friend of mine who has
been working in a nursing home for five
years as a CNA and three years as a home
health aide has described situations in
which nursing home patients have
developed serious bed sores from not
being looked after properly he then went
on to say that if there was one thing
that he could change about elder care it
would be that every person would have a
personal caregiver and this seems like a
simple enough solution however there is
a huge job shortage in this field Claire
Phillips who worked as a nurse in a care
home said that working in a nursing home
as seen as the job you get when you
can’t get a job in a hospital or you
want an easier life so it’s no surprise
that there’s a lack of care in these
homes the jobs themselves are often
grueling pay little and come with no
benefits in addition to these low
rewards the screening process itself is
poor
the New York Times highlighted that the
workforce that typically fills these
positions poorly educated low income
usually minority women will not see a
big increase over the next 10 years
my mother’s mom was the woman that I was
named after you could hear her laugh
from another room and she can entertain
an entire group of people with one of
her stories she was my best friend at 93
she was going strong
at the beginning of my sophomore year of
high school my mother and I moved in
with her
take care of her near the end of my
junior year I walked into the kitchen to
find her unable to form words and her
arms were slack now for many of you out
there you were thinking that these are
the classic signs of a stroke and that’s
exactly what I thought so i called 9-1-1
lucky for us it was only a urinary tract
infection also known as a UTI UTIs are
extremely common in the elderly they are
dangerous because they are so difficult
to prevent you avoid them by drinking
plenty of water
however when older people drink too much
water they suffer sodium deficiencies so
it’s all about maintaining a balance a
balance that neither my mom nor I were
aware of needed to be factored into her
care a balance that many trained nurses
were not aware of either because even in
the care of the rehab facilities she
began cycling through she kept getting
them I began to be an expert in knowing
when there was something wrong with my
grandmother I could tell the warning
signs of the UTI days before anyone else
and I tried to warn her nurse once I was
brushed off as not knowing what I was
talking about because I was only 16
ageism it is an ism that nearly killed
my grandmother because a few days later
my mom got a phone call that she was
enroute to the hospital she had had
another episode and a severe one the
culprit was another UTI the same widely
known senior living corporation with
several lawsuits filed against it that I
mentioned earlier was the same company
that owned the nursing home that my
grandmother stayed in the same nursing
home that brushed me off the same
nursing home that was so understaffed
that when my mom pressed the emergency
button in my grandmother’s room it took
13 minutes and 28 seconds for someone to
show up the same nursing home that I
could hear other patients and rooms down
the hall screaming you’re hurting me
and it was when no matter what my mom or
I did that changes still could not be
made I realized how truly prevalent
elderly abuses and then it’s time for a
change
economic power being used to silence
what is right can no longer be the norm
my grandmother best friend and namesake
passed away on November 1st 2015 and
that is why I stand before you today to
educate and motivate so together we can
end that abuse right here in Oklahoma
cameras and 96 year old Aretha
Mayberry’s room revealed caregivers
pushing her head down and preventing her
from breathing these are not only
distant people but our family members
they’re our best friends parents the
ones that would put up with our
late-night sleepovers they’re our
teachers our role models our neighbors
someone’s husband someone’s best friend
someone’s entire world 91% of nursing
homes lack the adequate staff to
properly care for their patients these
people gave us the world that we live in
today their sacrifices yesterday paved
the way for our success today and we
would be nowhere without the legacy that
they instilled in our culture and in our
families ninety five percent of nursing
home residents said they had been
neglected or seen another resident
neglected they deserve the same unbiased
respect that they gave to us because the
terrifying fact is that elders who
experienced abuse had a 300% higher risk
of death when compared to those who had
not these stories have gone unnoticed
for too long the small changes that we
can begin to make start with changing
the cultural mindset that growing old is
a burden and allowing this abuse to
simply slip by through this we can make
real waves and begin to change laws as
you transition into caring for your
parents start setting an example for
everyone else
we need to learn now explore other
possibilities get creative with care and
what our standards of it because as we
grow up we will be the change that we
are looking for after all it won’t be
long until we ourselves are elders thank you
now we are working towards our futures
we are not thinking about our final days
we don’t want to dwell upon the fact
that just as we are born dependent we
will likely die as such in the loving
arms of those that care for us if we’re
lucky at least if we’re lucky we will
meet our end a long time from now
surrounded by caring hands who help us
do for us the things we could once do
for ourselves I want to ask you today
how you want to face death so that you
will help be a part of the solution that
is the dark side of caregiving otherwise
known as elder abuse a fate that affects
one in 10 seniors every year my father’s
mom was vivacious and thriving until she
suffered a stroke when she was moved
into a nursing home to be cared for she
became upset about her lack of
independence her decline in health and
mental state was obvious but no matter
what my family did we were unable to
improve her condition her nurses brushed
it off as nothing more than the aging
process one day she called my father and
begged him to get her out of there she
had witnessed something horrible in the
hallway outside of her room a friend of
hers had slipped and fallen laid on the
ground for hours before being helped she
even described a nurse stepping over the
woman saying you’re not on my service
and I’m not going to help you this story
was verified by my grandmother’s
roommate but their case against the
nurses never saw the light of day
because no one believes the old and
senile the National Council on Aging
estimates that for every one case of
elder abuse 14 more go unreported
similar to my Graham’s situation this is
because oftentimes the witnesses are the
elderly themselves and their words stand
very small compared to those of an able
minded young adult there’s a stigma here
that I’d like to draw attention to
ageism when because of your old age you
are suddenly deemed unable to make
cognizant decisions and your wishes are
disregarded
according to the best available
estimates between one and two million
Americans age 65 or older have been
injured exploited or otherwise
mistreated by someone whom they depended
for care or protection the neglect in
this particular nursing home would later
cause another injury and this one would
result in a death the death of someone
that I cared about my grandmother who
was not supposed to be out of bed on her
own slipped in the hallway hit her head
and this caused her to go into a coma
before she passed away in ancient times
the elderly were revered as the wisest
and most valuable members of our society
today when family members are no longer
able to care for their elderly they are
placed in care homes where they are
subject to high chances of abuse and
neglect in which the living conditions
themselves are often below what the
already low standard is just like
technology we’ve become entrapped in
having the best and latest model whether
it be our phones our cars or our
clothing we have created a society that
relies on instant gratification and easy
fixes to our problems the creation of
nursing homes retirement homes and other
care homes were originally designed with
good intentions and as an easy fix to
the problem of our aging parents while
they still hold a positive mission
statement they rarely live up to those
promises when you google search the term
elderly the first adjusted search item
is abuse when you follow that very
search you get a google definition of
what that is but only after about four
different ads for law offices and
attorneys to see if there’s a case to be
made and for good reason there’s big
money in elder abuse cases one of the
biggest names in senior living in the
United States reached a 1 million dollar
settlement in February of 2016 for elder
abuse and a wrongful death another 13
million dollar lawsuit was reached a
year prior for the same company
recently another lawsuit was filed
against that same corporation because an
88 year old dementia patient in Michigan
walked out of an unlocked back door
where she slipped and fell could not
gain reentry and froze to death outside
overnight these big-name corporations
are known for spending millions of
dollars covering up the abuse cases so
their potential customers won’t know
that they are truly failing at providing
quality health care so my question is
why is this corporation in business and
more importantly why don’t they stop
putting the money into covering up the
abuse and rather put that money into
better care so the abuse can stop in the
first place a friend of mine who has
been working in a nursing home for five
years as a CNA and three years as a home
health aide has described situations in
which nursing home patients have
developed serious bed sores from not
being looked after properly he then went
on to say that if there was one thing
that he could change about elder care it
would be that every person would have a
personal caregiver and this seems like a
simple enough solution however there is
a huge job shortage in this field Claire
Phillips who worked as a nurse in a care
home said that working in a nursing home
as seen as the job you get when you
can’t get a job in a hospital or you
want an easier life so it’s no surprise
that there’s a lack of care in these
homes the jobs themselves are often
grueling pay little and come with no
benefits in addition to these low
rewards the screening process itself is
poor
the New York Times highlighted that the
workforce that typically fills these
positions poorly educated low income
usually minority women will not see a
big increase over the next 10 years
my mother’s mom was the woman that I was
named after you could hear her laugh
from another room and she can entertain
an entire group of people with one of
her stories she was my best friend at 93
she was going strong
at the beginning of my sophomore year of
high school my mother and I moved in
with her
take care of her near the end of my
junior year I walked into the kitchen to
find her unable to form words and her
arms were slack now for many of you out
there you were thinking that these are
the classic signs of a stroke and that’s
exactly what I thought so i called 9-1-1
lucky for us it was only a urinary tract
infection also known as a UTI UTIs are
extremely common in the elderly they are
dangerous because they are so difficult
to prevent you avoid them by drinking
plenty of water
however when older people drink too much
water they suffer sodium deficiencies so
it’s all about maintaining a balance a
balance that neither my mom nor I were
aware of needed to be factored into her
care a balance that many trained nurses
were not aware of either because even in
the care of the rehab facilities she
began cycling through she kept getting
them I began to be an expert in knowing
when there was something wrong with my
grandmother I could tell the warning
signs of the UTI days before anyone else
and I tried to warn her nurse once I was
brushed off as not knowing what I was
talking about because I was only 16
ageism it is an ism that nearly killed
my grandmother because a few days later
my mom got a phone call that she was
enroute to the hospital she had had
another episode and a severe one the
culprit was another UTI the same widely
known senior living corporation with
several lawsuits filed against it that I
mentioned earlier was the same company
that owned the nursing home that my
grandmother stayed in the same nursing
home that brushed me off the same
nursing home that was so understaffed
that when my mom pressed the emergency
button in my grandmother’s room it took
13 minutes and 28 seconds for someone to
show up the same nursing home that I
could hear other patients and rooms down
the hall screaming you’re hurting me
and it was when no matter what my mom or
I did that changes still could not be
made I realized how truly prevalent
elderly abuses and then it’s time for a
change
economic power being used to silence
what is right can no longer be the norm
my grandmother best friend and namesake
passed away on November 1st 2015 and
that is why I stand before you today to
educate and motivate so together we can
end that abuse right here in Oklahoma
cameras and 96 year old Aretha
Mayberry’s room revealed caregivers
pushing her head down and preventing her
from breathing these are not only
distant people but our family members
they’re our best friends parents the
ones that would put up with our
late-night sleepovers they’re our
teachers our role models our neighbors
someone’s husband someone’s best friend
someone’s entire world 91% of nursing
homes lack the adequate staff to
properly care for their patients these
people gave us the world that we live in
today their sacrifices yesterday paved
the way for our success today and we
would be nowhere without the legacy that
they instilled in our culture and in our
families ninety five percent of nursing
home residents said they had been
neglected or seen another resident
neglected they deserve the same unbiased
respect that they gave to us because the
terrifying fact is that elders who
experienced abuse had a 300% higher risk
of death when compared to those who had
not these stories have gone unnoticed
for too long the small changes that we
can begin to make start with changing
the cultural mindset that growing old is
a burden and allowing this abuse to
simply slip by through this we can make
real waves and begin to change laws as
you transition into caring for your
parents start setting an example for
everyone else
we need to learn now explore other
possibilities get creative with care and
what our standards of it because as we
grow up we will be the change that we
are looking for after all it won’t be
long until we ourselves are elders thank you
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