checking your likes is the new smokin
I think the problem is when when people
want to be socially and socially
connected constantly no matter what
they’re doing and that I think keeps
people from actually fully experiencing
whatever they’re actually doing a recent
60 Minutes segment exposed what’s called
brain hacking how everything Silicon
Valley develops is purposely designed to
make us feel compelled to check in
constantly they want you to use it in
particular ways and for long periods of
time because that’s how they make their
money this is why the average person
interacts with their phone over 2,600
times a day it wants all your attention
all the time we know the science is
clear we know that people who spend more
time on Facebook so far higher rates of
depression than people who spend less
time on Facebook right these things
balance alcohol is not bad too much
alcohol is bad gambling is fun too much
gambling is dangerous right there’s
nothing wrong with social media and cell
phones it’s the imbalance we become more
and more on the treadmill to the number
of likes or or or feedback we get
basically from social media and start
tying our own approval our own
self-worth to how much attention we get
from other people there wasn’t enough to
just successfully sell your product
people doing that they feel bad they get
depressed they feel anxious they can’t
get away from it they feel kind of quasi
addicted know what you’re saying about
social media now a huge share with young
kids absolutely but there’s this feeling
of kind of internal rot and corruption
that goes along with it it’s like yeah
well you’re wasting your life it’s like
so it’s painful it’s painful to
recognize that people have to understand
are you using your devices your device
using you can you put it down can you
turn it off we all know the feeling you
post a picture on social media and when
the likes pop up it floods your brain
with gratifying dopamine Facebook
purposely holds back the likes sometimes
so you will keep checking you know it’s
really interesting because I was at a
restaurant the other day I was looking
around and literally everyone in the
restaurant was looking at the phone no
one was talking to anybody and I was
thinking what if there was a drug that
did that what if there was a drug that
didn’t kill you but it just sucked up
all your time and just stared blankly at
your hand and did everything that you do
while you’re using a phone people would
be terrified like you’re staring at your
hand and crashing into cars you’re
staring at your hand and walking in the
polls we have age restrictions on
smoking gambling and alcohol and we have
no age restrictions and social media and
cell phones which is the equivalent of
opening up the liquor cabinet and saying
to our teenagers hey by the way this
adolescence thing if it gets you down
that’s basically what happened you have
an entire generation that has access to
an addictive numbing
two chemical called dopamine through
social media and cellphones as they’re
going through the high stress of
adolescence I think the big lie of our
generation is the phrase social media
it really isn’t it’s anti social media
and it has a lot of uses and you know
whatever but it’s not social in any
human sense and if you look at suicide
rates depression rage PTSD rates
xiety rates they’re doing nothing but
going up there our society we have to
ask a much deeper question which is what
do we want in our lives and what is our
self-worth actually tied to and maybe
it’s being virtuous or being a good
friend or being you know caring about
what matters or living by our values
there’s a whole bunch of things that we
could define for ourselves and I think
the the less people have defined their
own values the more vulnerable they are
to someone else coming in and giving
them their values what if I’m holding my
phone it’s not tweeting it’s not buzzing
it’s not beeping and I’m not checking it
I’m simply holding my phone do you feel
that you’re the most important thing to
me right now no you do not and this is
an artificial environment simply by
holding the phone which means when we
show up to a meeting and we put our
phones on the table it says to the rest
of people in the room you’re not the
most important thing to me right there
and by the way putting your phone upside
down is not more polite when we show up
for dinner with our families when we
have to have a conversation with one of
our students when we have to have a
conversation with a parent and we put a
phone on the table it says this is not
the most important thing to me right now
at you felt it and so the most important
thing to do is to get rid of the device
when you’re engaging with another human
being so when somebody says can I ask
you a question and you go what’s on your
because what it says is you have my attention
I think the problem is when when people
want to be socially and socially
connected constantly no matter what
they’re doing and that I think keeps
people from actually fully experiencing
whatever they’re actually doing a recent
60 Minutes segment exposed what’s called
brain hacking how everything Silicon
Valley develops is purposely designed to
make us feel compelled to check in
constantly they want you to use it in
particular ways and for long periods of
time because that’s how they make their
money this is why the average person
interacts with their phone over 2,600
times a day it wants all your attention
all the time we know the science is
clear we know that people who spend more
time on Facebook so far higher rates of
depression than people who spend less
time on Facebook right these things
balance alcohol is not bad too much
alcohol is bad gambling is fun too much
gambling is dangerous right there’s
nothing wrong with social media and cell
phones it’s the imbalance we become more
and more on the treadmill to the number
of likes or or or feedback we get
basically from social media and start
tying our own approval our own
self-worth to how much attention we get
from other people there wasn’t enough to
just successfully sell your product
people doing that they feel bad they get
depressed they feel anxious they can’t
get away from it they feel kind of quasi
addicted know what you’re saying about
social media now a huge share with young
kids absolutely but there’s this feeling
of kind of internal rot and corruption
that goes along with it it’s like yeah
well you’re wasting your life it’s like
so it’s painful it’s painful to
recognize that people have to understand
are you using your devices your device
using you can you put it down can you
turn it off we all know the feeling you
post a picture on social media and when
the likes pop up it floods your brain
with gratifying dopamine Facebook
purposely holds back the likes sometimes
so you will keep checking you know it’s
really interesting because I was at a
restaurant the other day I was looking
around and literally everyone in the
restaurant was looking at the phone no
one was talking to anybody and I was
thinking what if there was a drug that
did that what if there was a drug that
didn’t kill you but it just sucked up
all your time and just stared blankly at
your hand and did everything that you do
while you’re using a phone people would
be terrified like you’re staring at your
hand and crashing into cars you’re
staring at your hand and walking in the
polls we have age restrictions on
smoking gambling and alcohol and we have
no age restrictions and social media and
cell phones which is the equivalent of
opening up the liquor cabinet and saying
to our teenagers hey by the way this
adolescence thing if it gets you down
that’s basically what happened you have
an entire generation that has access to
an addictive numbing
two chemical called dopamine through
social media and cellphones as they’re
going through the high stress of
adolescence I think the big lie of our
generation is the phrase social media
it really isn’t it’s anti social media
and it has a lot of uses and you know
whatever but it’s not social in any
human sense and if you look at suicide
rates depression rage PTSD rates
xiety rates they’re doing nothing but
going up there our society we have to
ask a much deeper question which is what
do we want in our lives and what is our
self-worth actually tied to and maybe
it’s being virtuous or being a good
friend or being you know caring about
what matters or living by our values
there’s a whole bunch of things that we
could define for ourselves and I think
the the less people have defined their
own values the more vulnerable they are
to someone else coming in and giving
them their values what if I’m holding my
phone it’s not tweeting it’s not buzzing
it’s not beeping and I’m not checking it
I’m simply holding my phone do you feel
that you’re the most important thing to
me right now no you do not and this is
an artificial environment simply by
holding the phone which means when we
show up to a meeting and we put our
phones on the table it says to the rest
of people in the room you’re not the
most important thing to me right there
and by the way putting your phone upside
down is not more polite when we show up
for dinner with our families when we
have to have a conversation with one of
our students when we have to have a
conversation with a parent and we put a
phone on the table it says this is not
the most important thing to me right now
at you felt it and so the most important
thing to do is to get rid of the device
when you’re engaging with another human
being so when somebody says can I ask
you a question and you go what’s on your
because what it says is you have my attention
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