you you’re not in competition with with
anybody but yourself so those those
grudges you know those those reasons
that you may give yourself a motivation
ultimately are you know they’re
pointless mad at you
i’ma prove you wrong all right well when
I prove you wrong then what happened
what happens I’m so me right yes like I
don’t that there is no winning it so I
had to understand that if I’m gonna stay
true to what I feel that I can do then I
need to be the one to convince myself
that this is what I’m supposed to be
doing well there’s a ton of failures
like I said as a support for SpaceX the
first three launches failed and we were
just barely able to scrape together
enough parts and money to do the fourth
launch that both launch had failed we
would have been dead so multiple
failures along the way I tried very hard
to get the right expertise in for for
SpaceX I tried hard to to find a great
chief engineer for the rocket but it but
the good Chief Engineers wouldn’t join
and the bad ones well there’s no no
point in hiring them so I ended up a
chief engineer at the rocket so if I
could have found somebody better then we
would have maybe had less than three
failures I always say when I lift
something heavy I remember that is
Wolverine uh-huh do a little bit the way
you go I want to drop it and then you go
no way that little bit is Wolverine you
change bodies the way other actors
change costumes well this is your tool
as much as your voice as much as your
emotions and so I’ve always taken that
very seriously and I love playing
Wolverine it’s a great character but I
want it to be better than last time I
want to be physically in better shape
otherwise there’s no point doing it look
you’re a successful guy you don’t have
anything to prove to anyone you have
this little voice in your head telling
you to do more do better than if I
didn’t have that I wouldn’t be sitting
here obviously you
at the same time for the sake of people
around me it would be nice to be able to
go down for a while you know the thing
that I do at my company that is very
unusual is that we are completely
unreasonable
without reason without we don’t use yes
I’m logical okay yes I’m a sane person
but when it comes to achieving a target
we we do it with like we abandon reason
and logic we don’t talk about yeah but
we never start
yeah but or no we can’t or we couldn’t
because or it didn’t happen because any
any time you’re talking any time you’re
making sense of why something didn’t
work we don’t have the budget we can’t
do that because yeah but we’re different
you are being reasonable the great
things that have happened on this planet
and continue to happen or because people
are unreasonable they literally abandon
reason and logic they defy the universe
now if you look around if you’re a
logical person if you’re a person has to
make sense of it beforehand then spend
some time looking around the universe
look at nature look at all the things
that are done everyday that literally
defy gravity the five possibility defy
physics it’s all over the place if you
need to be reasonable now in my case I
don’t need to be reasonable because
there’s enough cases of super successful
people doing things that are amazing
whether it was a manufacturing a new
product or whether it was Steve Jobs
coming back to Apple and turn that
company around every day ever you look
at the Amazon look what Amazon is done
okay now you look at it you’re like dude
does a no-brainer make it make all
products available online now it’s a
no-brainer now it’s like it’s so logical
look at Velcro velcro is like God
out of that sea but beforehand it was
completely out of reason that you could
stick things together because they
scratch one another you understand what
I’m saying so look this is what I want
you to try try this in your life it’s
gonna be very difficult it’s one of the
most difficult things I do is being
unreasonable because all the people I’m
surrounded by or trying to make sense of
why they can’t do something quit making
sense of why you can’t do something and
become unreasonable until you do do
something if I had email I would be
inundated I choose not to have email or
ever turn a computer on now all my
companies are state of the art
technologically advanced if I want
something printed out it’s printed out
for me but I do this out of choice I’d
rather make a phone call to you or write
you a letter and communicate the way you
deserve to be communicated with and no
disrespecting people on email and I’d be
so inundated my gosh I’d be on that
computer all day long I prefer to have
that personal touch and it seems to work
with all the companies I have that I’m
quite active in but I have great
presence running most of them thank God
a very blessed our right to take care of
the details but I’m still hands on in
many many of the businesses here and
it’s I can work better that way and it
goes down to this pay attention to the
vital few ignore the trivia many if I
had email no disrespect there be a lot
of trivia on there I’d be answering I
try and pay attention to the vital for
you and ignore the trivial what do you
differentiate those those two categories
to be like where would let’s say your
president be and where would like the
head of a sales division be are they are
two sides of that equation no what it is
is if it’s one of my companies you could
call me directly but people know call me
directly if you have to but don’t bother
me with something someone else can
handle then they do it it works really
really fine works really well but what’s
important would be obviously presence of
company anyone that’s involved with me
either fill entropically the main people
feeling properly are the main people my
business is or places or countries I
want to reach out to of the head of a
country will call me I’ll call them
right back you know things are very very
significant insignificant are I’ll give
you an example in my life it has been
significant I’m hit up every months for
hundreds of requests send me $100
send me two million dollars you have all
the money share it with me and I just I
don’t even touch it I can’t
I’m swarmed I do so much philanthropy
now everyone expects that whether it’s a
two million dollar mortgage or hey I
want to start a new business send me
fifty thousand dollars because you have
money I don’t that people should do it
well that’s not true
I spend millions on philanthropic work
but I do it through our foundation where
it really makes sense not where I have
to go through it all so my question is
how do you begin to set up that system
so that you have the and I’ll call it a
luxury in some ways of communicating as
you see fit when you see fit with those
key decision-makers well for starters
I’m the chairman of the board okay at
the major companies so I know detail
what’s going on from the chairman of the
board supporting of you I also know that
the people that I’ve hired can do what
they’re doing much better than I can and
I know what I need to know and so do
they
so they could pick up the phone and call
me JP we just did this or look what
we’re doing here I also attend meetings
on a regular basis to see where we’re at
and where we’re going and meet with
marketing people meet with promotional
people meet with our educational people
sports marketing people to get a
hands-on feel for what we’re doing where
we’re going and those really important
meetings I sit in to help make the
decisions so a lot of you have written
to me about your fear of flying and I
can really relate to that fear because I
used to have the exact same fear but I
used this same strategy to conquer it
here’s how you’re going to do it so
first things first if you’ve got to do
something that really makes you nervous
or that you’re afraid to do before
you’re about to do it come up with an
anchor thought what’s an anchor thought
well an anchor thought is something
that’s going to anchor you so that you
don’t escalate any situation into a
full-blown panic attack or into a
situation where you screw things up it’s
a way for you to anchor yourself so you
maintain control over what you’re
thinking and how you behave so here’s an
example with flying it’s important when
you’re creating an anchor thought to
pick something that is in the proper
context of what you’re afraid to do so
for flying pick an anchor thought that
has to do with the trip that you’re
taking
so if I’m boarding a plane to fly back
home to Michigan an anchor thought might
be a picture in my mind of my mom and I
walking on the shores of Lake Michigan
where I grew up that’s a thought that
makes me happy it makes me excited and
it’s also related to the trip that I’m
taking if you have a conversation that
you need to have with your boss pick an
anchor thought about how you feel after
having that conversation maybe it’s you
picking up the phone and calling
somebody that you you love and saying oh
my gosh it went so well or you know you
walking out of the meeting and feeling
like yeah I survived that conversation I
feel pretty good about myself so now
that you have your anchor thought you’re
ready to beat the fear what if you’re
happy with your job but you don’t like
the place it’s in and the honest answer
for me as I would leave like I’m so held
but like I know what I want to do with
my life
it is so clear to me that I just
wouldn’t let anything stop me and that’s
why I left Tacoma I love Tacoma I was
not unhappy in Tacoma at all like people
always think I left for the weather or
whatever I didn’t I didn’t think about
the weather as a kid it was all I knew I
left because I wanted to be in a bigger
city that had more opportunity and that
was it and so I was moving towards
something and I think that there are two
things that motivate people moving away
from something so oh I don’t want that
to happen I don’t want like take
longevity I don’t want to die that’s
moving away from something I want to
live forever that’s moving towards
something so living forever for me is
about all the things that I could do and
all that so I’m moving towards that I’m
not moving away from a fear of death so
that here like the only perspective I
can give you is that if I ever had a
sense of like I can’t go as far as I
want to go in this place I would be gone
in a heartbeat
work on your focus perspective is
everything let me tell you something too
probably most of you is that you see
difficult as something negative for real
for real
you and I want you to I want you to see
difficult differently are you hearing me
I need you to see difficult differently
now now that wave lifter when my man
looking at those weights
he got that iron that iron is heavy but
he’s not looking at that I like look how
heavy the iron is and he knows what its
gonna do it’s gonna tear his muscles to
pieces
he gets it but what he understands is
that if he tears them down they go
rebuild themselves and when they rebuild
themselves they’re that much stronger
listen to me the more you go through the
more difficult it is the more
challenging it is listen to me the
harder it is are you hearing me the more
challenging it is all you’re doing baby
is building my soul you’re building
muscle so don’t quit don’t give up don’t
don’t stare it listen to me you don’t
get bumped by staring at weights you
don’t get bumped by but look you don’t
get healthier by staring at it you get
healthier by running up to it and
grabbing it and pushing it look push
through that stuff push through it you
can get through it he said he won’t put
on you more than you can bear you can’t
get through it we’ve been getting a ton
of questions about being paralyzed with
the fear of what other people think and
this is so commonplace I think every
human being on the planet is is
paralyzed in some aspect or some area of
their life because they’re concerned
about what their parents or but the
friends are with the friends on Facebook
or with their colleagues or with their
upline or their downline or whatever
what their neighbors are gonna think if
you are struggling with this and you
have not found it helpful to attack your
thinking patterns then here’s a trick
that I want you to try to break the
pattern of being paralyzed by what other
people think I want you to pick one
thing one thing that you’ve been wanting
to do that you’ve been thinking about
but you have stopped yourself from doing
because you’re concerned about what
other people think let me give you some
examples maybe you’ve wanted to go on a
wellness retreat but you think your
spouse will roll their eyes at you so
you haven’t done it maybe you have a
particular Facebook post or a blog so
many of you want to start a business or
start creating art but you’re terrified
of putting yourself out there because of
what other people will think today we’re
gonna break that pattern what you’re
going to do is you’re gonna pick one
thing
you’ve been stopping yourself from doing
and you’re going to do it you’re going
to do it and the reason why I want you
to do this is because I know that if
you’re still paralyzed you have not been
able to change your thinking patterns
yet that’s cool no problem
we’re gonna try a different tactic I
want you to change this paralysis
through action because if you sign up
for that class if you go on that retreat
if you create your art if you post that
blog post if you start that business you
will be proving to yourself through the
actions that you’re taking that you
don’t care what other people think try
that today let me know
number one what you’ve stopped yourself
from doing and number two what you’re
committing to doing today because one
way to break this is to attack the
thoughts and change the thoughts and get
into action first the other way to do it
is to recognize that you’re paralyzed
pick one thing that you’re gonna do and
actually get it done it is not easy to
identify the enemy in combat in war so
what you have to do is you have to
control what you can control right you
got to be prepared you’ve got to train
you’ve got to study
you’ve got to rehearse you’ve got to
remain vigilant you’ve got to maintain
discipline and everything you do so that
when the enemy does reveal itself you
have the ability to think it to out
maneuver to out fight the enemy and it’s
actually the same thing in business
right the enemy can be hard to identify
your competitors aren’t broadcasting
their next move you don’t know what the
markets gonna do you can’t be certain
about the next trend or the next down
term to the next bubble that’s gonna
burst you can’t know those things so you
have to do the same thing after control
what you can control which is you
gotta gather intelligence you got to
analyze the metrics that you can track
you got to train yourself and your team
to be prepared for both the known and
also be prepared for the unknown figure
out what the likely contingencies are
then have some plans to execute if those
contingencies occur maintain discipline
as an organization so that you have the
flexibility and the responsiveness to
maneuver effectively and efficiently
when the unpredictable actually happens
so instead of suffering and falling
apart in the chaos you can take
advantage of it and win and that
business and life is the same the enemy
is not always clear in life it can be
hard to tell who’s gonna try and bring
you now or what is going to bring you
down there’s distractions there are
things out there that will do you harm
that are so camouflaged you can’t see
them at all there are deceitful people
there are accidents that can occur and
diseases that take root and there’s bad
luck and there’s Murphy’s Law and
there’s times when it seems that the
whole world is against you the whole
world is the enemy and the same rules
control what you can’t control
you train hard learn maintain the
unmitigated daily discipline in all
things a lot of people a lot of people
can give up is easy to give up you know
yeah it’s the easiest thing in the world
to do I’m done
ain’t going oh yeah I gonna keep going
yeah that’s what I gonna work so one
yeah easy it’s very easy but what’s hard
is going yo yesterday I got nothing from
working as hard as I could
nothin happened from net I’m gonna do
the same thing again a day but I’m gonna
try to go harder that’s the hardest
thing in the world to get up every day
and give a hundred percent and and be in
the same position that you were each day
but mentally know that you’re trying and
trying and trying that’s that’s a real
that’s a real glad the fact that you
realize that that negative moment has
positive impact the question is why did
it happen and that’s what you have to be
honest with yourself I don’t know you
know but that’s you know I’m pumped that
you can have the I mean you’re more
positive and half the people here and it
sounds like you’re having a terrible
debt because basically when things
happen I go the other way so tonight I
just was reminding myself every time I
and every time you came and next person
came I’m just reminding my slit early in
my own head saying you don’t mean I said
it to one of you I said they said how do
you stay humble when you’re so
successful I’m like because I know if I
die tomorrow I’ll have a good day on
like most comments ever on my latest
post on Instagram and everybody’s to be
like off that was the last one weird and
and I know that all of you will be on
with your life a week later you have to
balance your ego with humility in the
same way when I’m having my worst day I
realize I’m the best I’m gonna be the
best that ever does this and so the way
I handle things is when something’s
going one way I use all my emotional
strength to push the other way what are
you gonna cry for us your life cuz the
conference comes up like I just like to
me it’s just like look what the guys if
you’re in this room right now let me
just remind you that there are seven
point seven billion people literally
right now as we stand here there are
women being shipped to be strippers in
parts of our world right now as we stand
here there are women who are basically
caged mentally usually and are being
shipped to dance on a pole in Manhattan
and in London like do you understand
what’s good there’s there’s genocide
going on right now like what do you
think’s going on like we lack
perspective your conference got that
boohoo
I lost a client boohoo there’s people
dying out there
like like so when Americans or Europeans
talk to me about race or gender I’m sad
it’s the real life but I remind them
because it’s a positive thing cool but
let me tell you about the person that’s
ranked 7 billion in the world they have
it bad and so I just I struggle like I
want to run like I uh listen I’m a weird
I think about things like animals like I
don’t know like if you’re the best
elephant
we are still better than you
like you know like without really listen
you know I got hot on this about a year
ago the four hundred trillion to one
it’s impossible to be a human being you
one I don’t know how to get upset after
that I keep in perspective right like
you’re gonna learn from this you’ve got
I promise you it’s failing cuz you and
and when you start owning your and not
blaming other people and I think this is
the kick I’ve been on lately on
Instagram right like blame yourself you
know I’m always happy I blame myself
when you blame yourself for real you’re
gonna always be happy because you don’t
feel like somebody else controls you I
went from zero never had been paid for a
speech to literally the most booked
woman in the world in three years flat
crazy there’s a number of reasons why
number one the contents terrific I’m
also a really good public speaker
there’s not a lot of women on the
circuit but more importantly I behave in
a way because I know that the number one
asset and business is make the people
you’re dealing with know that they
matter take care of everybody you deal
with everybody the event planners
speaking bureaus everybody has something
that they’re worried about you get rid
of the worry you make them feel like
they’re important everybody wants to be
around you because at the end of the day
we all want to know that we matter so if
you do business with people that make
you feel good you want to do more
business with them and so it’s a really
really simple thing I called my
philosophy about human beings is just be
a fan just cheer for everybody there’s
so much success to go around people have
really difficult lives they make things
really hard for themselves make their
life easy make them feel great give them
a hug smile complement be generous don’t
be a pain in the ass like literally it’s
that simple it’s a very natural process
to begin something to be very excited
and then as you go down that process to
realize yeah I actually don’t like this
it’s not giving me as much energy as I
thought it would is taking energy away
and therefore I want to give up and quit
that thing and she said if you do that
once or twice like hey so be it but if
you’re doing it every time if you just
love that initial rush that excitement
of something new but the actual
nitty-gritty
reality of getting good at it of doing
what Mitch you Kaku calls having but
power meaning you’ve set your butt in
the seat and you do the work if that’s
really your problem
and nothing is interesting enough for
you to sit there and do the work you
haven’t developed grit yet and so grit
is the ability to persevere to see
things through to go past the point at
which it has stopped being fun and it
becomes boring because you believe in
your end goal enough you’re excited by
what you’re trying to accomplish so much
that you’re willing to fight through all
of that difficulty you’re willing to
fight through the boredom you’re willing
to fight through the unease that arises
when you step outside your comfort zone
you’re doing things you’re not good at
and things that are boring those are the
two things that I find kill most people
they just cannot handle the things that
make them go oh god like I’m not very
good at this and I’m feeling really
badly about myself and they forget that
they can get good on a long enough
timeline and then too inevitably in any
pursuit of greatness in any endeavor
where you’re trying to gain mastery
you’re gonna get bored because practice
is repetition it’s doing something over
and over and over and over to really
train yourself to get to the point where
you’re truly exceptional and there’s
just so much boredom inherent in that
process so building in the resilience to
see all that stuff through is the key
part of grit everyone that’s out there
grinding working driving trucks pouring
concrete hammering on a project building
bridges or building software sewing some
garments or sewing of field farmers
factory workers engineers electricians
plumbers and pilots and ground crew and
cooks and waitresses to everyone out
there working hard and listening to this
and just trying to get yourself a little
thanks for listening and as you meet
struggles and as you struggle to stay on
the path first of all remember you don’t
have to fight alone reach out to your
comrades in arms call for fire support
when you need it we win wars because we
stick together and when we stick
together we can overcome any enemy and
the struggles that you face when they
when they do try to flank you do what
Jodie did do what a soldier does turned
into the ambush turn toward the enemy
fire and attack every time I’m having
trouble every time I’m like man I don’t
think I can get to where I’m going I
just started looking at the top I don’t
look at the bad facts all I do is I
start searching tell me about wealthy
people facts about wealthy people
anything what are they doing what are
they buying it just gets me out of my
problem right it gets me to think bigger
you know the first plane I bought I
bought this plane because I saw other
wealthy people making moves I’m not an
irresponsible person okay like I have
always been a very frugal person but the
frugal was hurting me
not helping me your network is your net
worth how rich you can get has something
to do with who you’re hanging with how
rich you can think has something to do
with you who you’re hanging with okay
how smart you are has something to do
with your surroundings if you hang out
with dumb people you go end up dumb if
you hang out with junkies you’re going
to end up being a junkie you hang out
with criminals I’m not talking about two
people to go to jail I’m talking about
all the people it’s your office right
now they cheat their employer and cheat
themselves you hang out with creme
crimps you end being a creme if you want
to build a network number one thing
commit to building a network a network
by definite
not if you’re building a new it Network
it’s not the people you’re already with
it’s how do I add people to my network
so number one you got to commit to
building a network number two who do you
want in the network who is it
most of you just go for more people like
you have already in your network I want
new people new characters new
personalities new thinking new ideas
the old adage if you’re the smartest
person in the room you in the wrong room
and number three when you start building
this network up and you start meeting
the people ok number two is who do you
want to meet who who you and Anthony met
network you go 9,000 people in a room
you don’t need to meet all 9,000 you
need to meet maybe a list of 30 or 40
people who do you want to meet number 3
when you meet them focus on them not on
you it shouldn’t be here’s my card
I’m a chiropractor this is what I do can
I give you an adjustment it should be
like who are you how can I help you what
are you doing where do you live ok what
projects are you working on how can I
help you you can’t overcome the feelings
that are rising up Langley but you can
take action despite them that’s a very
important distinction that I want each
and every one of you to understand the
things that you’re feeling clenching up
feeling like you’re not good enough
feeling like you’re not ready doubting
yourself kind of spending too much time
thinking about how much time you’ve
wasted all that that’s normal that we
all do you cannot overcome those
thoughts because they keep rising up and
they’ve become a habit and it’s sort of
a pattern so I don’t want you to focus
on the thoughts I want you to focus on
taking action even though you doubt
yourself you are gonna feel like an
impostor until you push through that
clenched up moment over and over and
over again and then suddenly through
action language
you’re gonna see that you’re not an
impostor at all you’re actually the kind
of person that pushes through and does
what he or she says they are going to do
if you want to be successful in business
if you truly want that side hustle to
turn into your full-time thing you have
to learn how to let the feelings of
doubt rise up but take action anyway
everyone gets hammered man everyone gets
knocked down you get a you miss a close
someone changes their mind yeah you get
rejected and interview you you lose your
baseball career over the hell it is it’s
not whether you’re getting knocked down
it’s not even whether you get up
everybody eventually gets up everybody
gets up yeah it’s the time you’re on
your ass it’s the time you stay on the
mat so what happened was my dream got
squashed instead of laying around for
six or eight months I was up immediately
like that day off the mat now my eyes
are open your eyes are closed when
you’re on the mat yeah yeah so the
longer you stay on the mat just because
you’ve been defeated you’ve now become
blinded as you said and it’s prevented
from getting any other opportunity or
blessings in your life so the key is
getting your butt up like literally
getting up and opening your eyes again
and chasing again you’re gonna get up so
you might as well do it now I think of
your average you play into the situation
you know I just had so like let’s say
it’s perceived as negative like you go
there you know you go with oh he hating
on me or she hating on me I’ll give you
a prime example when I was average I saw
my wife’s treatment of my gift as
opposition like oh she ain’t supported
me you know I’m saying like Oh am I here
speaking you know I’m saying like every
time I speak secret teaching me you know
she never said none positive about my
presentation like every time I get off
stage if it’s the best that I thought I
ever did she like what you should have
done this you shouldn’t have said that
like come on you know better than that
you didn’t I’m just like yo what’s up
like where’s the support you know that
was average you know great was she going
to work when I’m working on becoming
I should go to work everyday so she
supported you you got health insurance
because she had health insurance
she got a 401k she’s built up a bank
account
she got a phenomenal credit score and
got us a house with her credit score
saying no but when I was average it was
like you’re not doing what I want you to
do but when I became great I realized
you know I already got 40 people that
just said that was a phenomenal message
you don’t get better by people telling
you what you did right and get better by
watching the film you get better by
critiquing yourself so here’s a person
who’s brave enough to critique me
because somebody else might have thought
the same thing but they weren’t gonna
say none to me about it you know I’m
saying so just looking at the situation
like you know don’t look at it average
people look at you know what it is they
don’t critical think they don’t analyze
they don’t they don’t they don’t unpack
you know what I’m saying like they just
see that’s blue and not go deeper into
well actually that could be whatever it
is yellow and purple whatever colors big
blue like this is what this really is so
for me average taking everything as it
was
you know victim phenomenal Victoire and
seeing possibilities seeing beyond you
know what surf is that to me that’s one
of the characteristics that determine a
person who’s average versus somebody
who’s great how did you stay motivated
all the time people ask me that all the
time and the answer is I did it and
neither did you to become successful the
separator in life is really important
thing the most inspired motivated person
wins nah not really
it’s the person who can work on the
day’s they’re not inspired and motivated
it’s what do you do when you’re not
feeling great what do you do when it’s
not your best day how do you do that
carries you through as rituals and
habits so when you’re fatigued when
you’re tired when you’re under pressure
you react reflexively and so successful
people rely on habits and rituals not
just their inspiration and motivation
level of course we’re both professionals
and being motivated and inspired but
that’s not every day every minute and so
what do I do I work on the days because
my habits and rituals carry me through
and so for me here’s how I look at my
life in my day if I can control the
first 30 minutes of my day
in the last 30 minutes of my day I have
a whole lot better chance of the middle
of my day being controlled and so I’m a
freak about the first 30 minutes of
every day it’s really about the first 45
minutes and I’m obsessive about the last
45 minutes of every single day
that gives me some illusion in my mind
and measure of control the other thing
it does it delivers to me habits and
rituals that serve me that I do every
day that are consistent it gives me
comfort in stormy times that ocean out
there is raging at the top right now
right the waves are crashing at the
bottom of that ocean it’s completely
calm at the bottom of that ocean is the
habitual part of the water right it’s
the list if the part of the were that
stays the most consistent that’s why
it’s so calm okay so when you see
someone out of control their emotions
are up and down all the time this is
someone who is without rituals and
habits successful people have those and
so they do and so it keeps me calm it
keeps me comfortable first 45 years for
sure I was completely lost and somewhere
between 45 and 51 I started figuring out
okay what am i doing I started sorting
my life out I started getting some
started doing some courses that really
really made a difference in my life I’ve
always been in a self-improvement my
whole life and but it wasn’t until I was
about 45 that I really started
discovering information that could make
me more confident me more sure you know
when I was 25 years old was a young
salesperson and I didn’t like sales and
I and I got educated on how to sell and
I became very very good at it I started
to understand the process the customer
the objections the rebuttal is how to
follow up how to handle the rejection
and the disappointment that discouraged
how to get over but that didn’t help me
become more confident in me as a person
as an individual I was making money by
the time I was 31 I had a couple
businesses they were making money
probably had you know three four hundred
thousand dollars saved when I was thirty
31 years old because I was trying to
make a little money right by the time
I’m 33 I got it probably a million
dollars in a bank I still didn’t feel
good about myself
I’m just nagging nagging like sense of
desperation and satis depression
when I started working on me spiritually
that’s that’s when that’s when at 45 46
47 years old that’s when everything
changed for me like everything all the
expansion the the confidence getting out
in the world maybe a little better
communicating than I was doing I’m not
perfect at it by any means now and I
started getting more certainty about Who
I am what I am where I’m going and why
I’m here like if you don’t figure those
things out no amount of money no amount
of money in the world will will fill you
up
no the private planes won’t the fancy
cars you have to know where you’re going
start learning personal development
right you know Tony Robbins and and and
and all of a sudden my mind is opened up
into my surroundings of the people
around me who do I need to cut out
because they’re cancerous versus who I
need to spend more time with because I
need a rise to their level
and all of a sudden I realize holy cow
man these these are built-in coaches as
a personal trainer one-on-one your
clients are typically the affluent
people right right so I started asking
all my my clients in between workouts
right you know a little business advice
here a little business advice there and
I found it these are people who practice
one guy’s got a software company next
guy this automotive company right rental
cars public storage places and man it
was just the best advice versus taking
advice from a family member or friend
who goes I heard it on Shark Tank it’s
not practicing it wasn’t experienced it
yeah so that’s the big thing is to take
advice from someone who’s been there and
done that and and if they they’re
consulting in your industry but they
come from a different industry I would
tread cautiously yeah okay
yeah but you think everyone should have
a coach I believe so I think so too
as athletes we have coaches try to do it
on your own
no no if you’ve dealt with trauma in
your life whether it’s some kind of
physical abuse sexual abuse whatever
neglect as a kid you go to a therapist a
good therapist is a coach yes
right you’ve got personal development
random bouchard’s why not have business
coaches why not have high performance
coaches if you’ve got limiting beliefs
why not have someone resent your
thermostat that mom and dad had set so
low Yeah right
or circumstance of growing up it’s that
so low we’re in it we can’t see the
trees yeah I look at it as a coach a
good coach is in a helicopter saying you
know you see a lot of trees but I know
if you go up 50 yards that way and then
10 yards that way you’ve got an open
path be open up yeah that’s it that’s
what a coach does he buy you time they
buy you speed that buy you success you
are probably at the most dangerous part
of your life he’s like dad I’ve got
three months and I graduated from
college like I work with Tom Izzo you
know I want a dad I went nearly eight
bring a final four ring dad I got a job
offer of a lifetime and I was like
that’s the problem I’m like everything
you’ve ever dreamed of you are three
months away so what happens three months
and one day like you have nothing son
like I said so what you have to do for
me is now I need you to start all over
from scratch I need you to come up with
what’s the next four years look like
what’s the next round I’m like is it
getting the 800 credit score is it
saving $250,000 is it finding the girl
of your dream and getting married you
know
is it buying a house helping your mom
buy pay for your sister to go to school
my son I don’t care what it is
but you don’t understand this is
dangerous because this is where people
mess up they get comfortable they saddle
and they think yo I made it like you
said that’s the worst place in the world
so I told my son like yo just imagine in
three months you’re gonna wake up and
every dream you’ve had since you were 6
or 7 years old
it’s who graduates with the dream job
you know who lives in New York who’s a
man he’s gonna be in Manhattan Times
Square you know so I said son this is a
dangerous place so I say to those
individuals yeah you’re right
you don’t want to hit rock bottom but
you have to create your own mental rock
bottom so that you don’t hit rock bottom
persuasion anything so if you want to
persuade your children
if you want to persuade someone to take
a look at your faith if you want to
persuade someone in business if you want
to persuade someone to help you in
anything or help them in anything it’s
real simple for me
monster belief and so you can’t transfer
to me that which you’re not experiencing
yourself right so you can’t give me a
people always tryna cope with a magic
word the magic clothes the magic this
and there are words you shouldn’t
shouldn’t use in persuasion no question
about it right there are think there are
words that are more effective in other
words and clearly to be successful in
any business you need to know what those
words are in your business the best
persuaders the best motivators the best
speakers the best physicians the best
school teachers the best parents are
incredible persuaders and what they do
is they come from a monster place of
conviction and belief that they can
transfer you to because people respond
to energy much more than they do words
they respond to what they feel not what
they hear and see here and see a real
low level influencers energy spirit
transfer of energy is what people
respond to and so I’m cognizant all the
time of getting in a state of total
belief and certainty about what it is
that I’m gonna represent or speaking if
I’m speaking on stage about a particular
topic and then transferring that energy
into people and that seems generic or
hokey but it’s actually what great
persuaders do in fact if you’re
listening to this you think of anybody
that you know who’s incredibly
persuasive they may have great words
they probably do but it’s something you
feel from them right and that’s the
difference between a great doctor and a
so-so doctor great doc says here’s the
prescription you’re out of here another
one is they kind of work or not I don’t
know the other one you leave there
feeling that you’re going to be healed
settling you’re in good hands you feel
their certainty you feel their
confidence saying when you hear a
speaker if you’re buying real estate
from somebody but it’s not just buying
things it’s a great pastor in a church a
great person if you do TM who’s taught
you TM it’s there’s certainty it’s the
energy you feel and so for me it’s
always getting to I have to really
believe what I’m saying I have to really
feel it to transfer to find what you’re
looking for I’ve been giving a lot of
thought to kind of just watching what
I’m seeing out there in the social
digital ecosystem and very honestly just
real life
and I’m watching so many people over the
last two to three years look for
negativity look for something that’s
wrong
find where people disagree with them
fight look for what was me downside the
half glass empty and and then I go to a
Twitter search or look around the world
and I find ridiculously beautiful things
every day every day thousands of kind
acts randomly by people all people that
I have conversations with who see the
opportunities whether it’s in business
like voice and AR or crypto or whatever
it may be just this amazingly
interesting thing that I feel the
majority of you are looking for the
wrong while there’s a plenty of wrong
and plenty of right in the world it
comes down to one very simple thing what
are you choosing to look for because I
promise you if you right now and I’m
making this video for one reason 24
hours of trying to find the good
somebody saves a kid somebody opens the
door somebody does a nice thing for you
bid somebody system thank you 24 hours
of looking for positivity could change
your life honestly making this for one
person one one person watches this video
chooses to do 24 hours of looking for
good instead of looking for bad and
their game changes d-roc heard somebody
at a convenience store saying mom you’re
always so negative you’re always so
negative I am blown away by the fact
that life gets real simple if you break
down into this are you looking for the
negative this sucks this government
sucks this person sucks this is are you
looking for the positive she’s nice
that’s remarkable I’ve got this
opportunity you choose what you’re
looking for because what you look for you find that’s how life works
anybody but yourself so those those
grudges you know those those reasons
that you may give yourself a motivation
ultimately are you know they’re
pointless mad at you
i’ma prove you wrong all right well when
I prove you wrong then what happened
what happens I’m so me right yes like I
don’t that there is no winning it so I
had to understand that if I’m gonna stay
true to what I feel that I can do then I
need to be the one to convince myself
that this is what I’m supposed to be
doing well there’s a ton of failures
like I said as a support for SpaceX the
first three launches failed and we were
just barely able to scrape together
enough parts and money to do the fourth
launch that both launch had failed we
would have been dead so multiple
failures along the way I tried very hard
to get the right expertise in for for
SpaceX I tried hard to to find a great
chief engineer for the rocket but it but
the good Chief Engineers wouldn’t join
and the bad ones well there’s no no
point in hiring them so I ended up a
chief engineer at the rocket so if I
could have found somebody better then we
would have maybe had less than three
failures I always say when I lift
something heavy I remember that is
Wolverine uh-huh do a little bit the way
you go I want to drop it and then you go
no way that little bit is Wolverine you
change bodies the way other actors
change costumes well this is your tool
as much as your voice as much as your
emotions and so I’ve always taken that
very seriously and I love playing
Wolverine it’s a great character but I
want it to be better than last time I
want to be physically in better shape
otherwise there’s no point doing it look
you’re a successful guy you don’t have
anything to prove to anyone you have
this little voice in your head telling
you to do more do better than if I
didn’t have that I wouldn’t be sitting
here obviously you
at the same time for the sake of people
around me it would be nice to be able to
go down for a while you know the thing
that I do at my company that is very
unusual is that we are completely
unreasonable
without reason without we don’t use yes
I’m logical okay yes I’m a sane person
but when it comes to achieving a target
we we do it with like we abandon reason
and logic we don’t talk about yeah but
we never start
yeah but or no we can’t or we couldn’t
because or it didn’t happen because any
any time you’re talking any time you’re
making sense of why something didn’t
work we don’t have the budget we can’t
do that because yeah but we’re different
you are being reasonable the great
things that have happened on this planet
and continue to happen or because people
are unreasonable they literally abandon
reason and logic they defy the universe
now if you look around if you’re a
logical person if you’re a person has to
make sense of it beforehand then spend
some time looking around the universe
look at nature look at all the things
that are done everyday that literally
defy gravity the five possibility defy
physics it’s all over the place if you
need to be reasonable now in my case I
don’t need to be reasonable because
there’s enough cases of super successful
people doing things that are amazing
whether it was a manufacturing a new
product or whether it was Steve Jobs
coming back to Apple and turn that
company around every day ever you look
at the Amazon look what Amazon is done
okay now you look at it you’re like dude
does a no-brainer make it make all
products available online now it’s a
no-brainer now it’s like it’s so logical
look at Velcro velcro is like God
out of that sea but beforehand it was
completely out of reason that you could
stick things together because they
scratch one another you understand what
I’m saying so look this is what I want
you to try try this in your life it’s
gonna be very difficult it’s one of the
most difficult things I do is being
unreasonable because all the people I’m
surrounded by or trying to make sense of
why they can’t do something quit making
sense of why you can’t do something and
become unreasonable until you do do
something if I had email I would be
inundated I choose not to have email or
ever turn a computer on now all my
companies are state of the art
technologically advanced if I want
something printed out it’s printed out
for me but I do this out of choice I’d
rather make a phone call to you or write
you a letter and communicate the way you
deserve to be communicated with and no
disrespecting people on email and I’d be
so inundated my gosh I’d be on that
computer all day long I prefer to have
that personal touch and it seems to work
with all the companies I have that I’m
quite active in but I have great
presence running most of them thank God
a very blessed our right to take care of
the details but I’m still hands on in
many many of the businesses here and
it’s I can work better that way and it
goes down to this pay attention to the
vital few ignore the trivia many if I
had email no disrespect there be a lot
of trivia on there I’d be answering I
try and pay attention to the vital for
you and ignore the trivial what do you
differentiate those those two categories
to be like where would let’s say your
president be and where would like the
head of a sales division be are they are
two sides of that equation no what it is
is if it’s one of my companies you could
call me directly but people know call me
directly if you have to but don’t bother
me with something someone else can
handle then they do it it works really
really fine works really well but what’s
important would be obviously presence of
company anyone that’s involved with me
either fill entropically the main people
feeling properly are the main people my
business is or places or countries I
want to reach out to of the head of a
country will call me I’ll call them
right back you know things are very very
significant insignificant are I’ll give
you an example in my life it has been
significant I’m hit up every months for
hundreds of requests send me $100
send me two million dollars you have all
the money share it with me and I just I
don’t even touch it I can’t
I’m swarmed I do so much philanthropy
now everyone expects that whether it’s a
two million dollar mortgage or hey I
want to start a new business send me
fifty thousand dollars because you have
money I don’t that people should do it
well that’s not true
I spend millions on philanthropic work
but I do it through our foundation where
it really makes sense not where I have
to go through it all so my question is
how do you begin to set up that system
so that you have the and I’ll call it a
luxury in some ways of communicating as
you see fit when you see fit with those
key decision-makers well for starters
I’m the chairman of the board okay at
the major companies so I know detail
what’s going on from the chairman of the
board supporting of you I also know that
the people that I’ve hired can do what
they’re doing much better than I can and
I know what I need to know and so do
they
so they could pick up the phone and call
me JP we just did this or look what
we’re doing here I also attend meetings
on a regular basis to see where we’re at
and where we’re going and meet with
marketing people meet with promotional
people meet with our educational people
sports marketing people to get a
hands-on feel for what we’re doing where
we’re going and those really important
meetings I sit in to help make the
decisions so a lot of you have written
to me about your fear of flying and I
can really relate to that fear because I
used to have the exact same fear but I
used this same strategy to conquer it
here’s how you’re going to do it so
first things first if you’ve got to do
something that really makes you nervous
or that you’re afraid to do before
you’re about to do it come up with an
anchor thought what’s an anchor thought
well an anchor thought is something
that’s going to anchor you so that you
don’t escalate any situation into a
full-blown panic attack or into a
situation where you screw things up it’s
a way for you to anchor yourself so you
maintain control over what you’re
thinking and how you behave so here’s an
example with flying it’s important when
you’re creating an anchor thought to
pick something that is in the proper
context of what you’re afraid to do so
for flying pick an anchor thought that
has to do with the trip that you’re
taking
so if I’m boarding a plane to fly back
home to Michigan an anchor thought might
be a picture in my mind of my mom and I
walking on the shores of Lake Michigan
where I grew up that’s a thought that
makes me happy it makes me excited and
it’s also related to the trip that I’m
taking if you have a conversation that
you need to have with your boss pick an
anchor thought about how you feel after
having that conversation maybe it’s you
picking up the phone and calling
somebody that you you love and saying oh
my gosh it went so well or you know you
walking out of the meeting and feeling
like yeah I survived that conversation I
feel pretty good about myself so now
that you have your anchor thought you’re
ready to beat the fear what if you’re
happy with your job but you don’t like
the place it’s in and the honest answer
for me as I would leave like I’m so held
but like I know what I want to do with
my life
it is so clear to me that I just
wouldn’t let anything stop me and that’s
why I left Tacoma I love Tacoma I was
not unhappy in Tacoma at all like people
always think I left for the weather or
whatever I didn’t I didn’t think about
the weather as a kid it was all I knew I
left because I wanted to be in a bigger
city that had more opportunity and that
was it and so I was moving towards
something and I think that there are two
things that motivate people moving away
from something so oh I don’t want that
to happen I don’t want like take
longevity I don’t want to die that’s
moving away from something I want to
live forever that’s moving towards
something so living forever for me is
about all the things that I could do and
all that so I’m moving towards that I’m
not moving away from a fear of death so
that here like the only perspective I
can give you is that if I ever had a
sense of like I can’t go as far as I
want to go in this place I would be gone
in a heartbeat
work on your focus perspective is
everything let me tell you something too
probably most of you is that you see
difficult as something negative for real
for real
you and I want you to I want you to see
difficult differently are you hearing me
I need you to see difficult differently
now now that wave lifter when my man
looking at those weights
he got that iron that iron is heavy but
he’s not looking at that I like look how
heavy the iron is and he knows what its
gonna do it’s gonna tear his muscles to
pieces
he gets it but what he understands is
that if he tears them down they go
rebuild themselves and when they rebuild
themselves they’re that much stronger
listen to me the more you go through the
more difficult it is the more
challenging it is listen to me the
harder it is are you hearing me the more
challenging it is all you’re doing baby
is building my soul you’re building
muscle so don’t quit don’t give up don’t
don’t stare it listen to me you don’t
get bumped by staring at weights you
don’t get bumped by but look you don’t
get healthier by staring at it you get
healthier by running up to it and
grabbing it and pushing it look push
through that stuff push through it you
can get through it he said he won’t put
on you more than you can bear you can’t
get through it we’ve been getting a ton
of questions about being paralyzed with
the fear of what other people think and
this is so commonplace I think every
human being on the planet is is
paralyzed in some aspect or some area of
their life because they’re concerned
about what their parents or but the
friends are with the friends on Facebook
or with their colleagues or with their
upline or their downline or whatever
what their neighbors are gonna think if
you are struggling with this and you
have not found it helpful to attack your
thinking patterns then here’s a trick
that I want you to try to break the
pattern of being paralyzed by what other
people think I want you to pick one
thing one thing that you’ve been wanting
to do that you’ve been thinking about
but you have stopped yourself from doing
because you’re concerned about what
other people think let me give you some
examples maybe you’ve wanted to go on a
wellness retreat but you think your
spouse will roll their eyes at you so
you haven’t done it maybe you have a
particular Facebook post or a blog so
many of you want to start a business or
start creating art but you’re terrified
of putting yourself out there because of
what other people will think today we’re
gonna break that pattern what you’re
going to do is you’re gonna pick one
thing
you’ve been stopping yourself from doing
and you’re going to do it you’re going
to do it and the reason why I want you
to do this is because I know that if
you’re still paralyzed you have not been
able to change your thinking patterns
yet that’s cool no problem
we’re gonna try a different tactic I
want you to change this paralysis
through action because if you sign up
for that class if you go on that retreat
if you create your art if you post that
blog post if you start that business you
will be proving to yourself through the
actions that you’re taking that you
don’t care what other people think try
that today let me know
number one what you’ve stopped yourself
from doing and number two what you’re
committing to doing today because one
way to break this is to attack the
thoughts and change the thoughts and get
into action first the other way to do it
is to recognize that you’re paralyzed
pick one thing that you’re gonna do and
actually get it done it is not easy to
identify the enemy in combat in war so
what you have to do is you have to
control what you can control right you
got to be prepared you’ve got to train
you’ve got to study
you’ve got to rehearse you’ve got to
remain vigilant you’ve got to maintain
discipline and everything you do so that
when the enemy does reveal itself you
have the ability to think it to out
maneuver to out fight the enemy and it’s
actually the same thing in business
right the enemy can be hard to identify
your competitors aren’t broadcasting
their next move you don’t know what the
markets gonna do you can’t be certain
about the next trend or the next down
term to the next bubble that’s gonna
burst you can’t know those things so you
have to do the same thing after control
what you can control which is you
gotta gather intelligence you got to
analyze the metrics that you can track
you got to train yourself and your team
to be prepared for both the known and
also be prepared for the unknown figure
out what the likely contingencies are
then have some plans to execute if those
contingencies occur maintain discipline
as an organization so that you have the
flexibility and the responsiveness to
maneuver effectively and efficiently
when the unpredictable actually happens
so instead of suffering and falling
apart in the chaos you can take
advantage of it and win and that
business and life is the same the enemy
is not always clear in life it can be
hard to tell who’s gonna try and bring
you now or what is going to bring you
down there’s distractions there are
things out there that will do you harm
that are so camouflaged you can’t see
them at all there are deceitful people
there are accidents that can occur and
diseases that take root and there’s bad
luck and there’s Murphy’s Law and
there’s times when it seems that the
whole world is against you the whole
world is the enemy and the same rules
control what you can’t control
you train hard learn maintain the
unmitigated daily discipline in all
things a lot of people a lot of people
can give up is easy to give up you know
yeah it’s the easiest thing in the world
to do I’m done
ain’t going oh yeah I gonna keep going
yeah that’s what I gonna work so one
yeah easy it’s very easy but what’s hard
is going yo yesterday I got nothing from
working as hard as I could
nothin happened from net I’m gonna do
the same thing again a day but I’m gonna
try to go harder that’s the hardest
thing in the world to get up every day
and give a hundred percent and and be in
the same position that you were each day
but mentally know that you’re trying and
trying and trying that’s that’s a real
that’s a real glad the fact that you
realize that that negative moment has
positive impact the question is why did
it happen and that’s what you have to be
honest with yourself I don’t know you
know but that’s you know I’m pumped that
you can have the I mean you’re more
positive and half the people here and it
sounds like you’re having a terrible
debt because basically when things
happen I go the other way so tonight I
just was reminding myself every time I
and every time you came and next person
came I’m just reminding my slit early in
my own head saying you don’t mean I said
it to one of you I said they said how do
you stay humble when you’re so
successful I’m like because I know if I
die tomorrow I’ll have a good day on
like most comments ever on my latest
post on Instagram and everybody’s to be
like off that was the last one weird and
and I know that all of you will be on
with your life a week later you have to
balance your ego with humility in the
same way when I’m having my worst day I
realize I’m the best I’m gonna be the
best that ever does this and so the way
I handle things is when something’s
going one way I use all my emotional
strength to push the other way what are
you gonna cry for us your life cuz the
conference comes up like I just like to
me it’s just like look what the guys if
you’re in this room right now let me
just remind you that there are seven
point seven billion people literally
right now as we stand here there are
women being shipped to be strippers in
parts of our world right now as we stand
here there are women who are basically
caged mentally usually and are being
shipped to dance on a pole in Manhattan
and in London like do you understand
what’s good there’s there’s genocide
going on right now like what do you
think’s going on like we lack
perspective your conference got that
boohoo
I lost a client boohoo there’s people
dying out there
like like so when Americans or Europeans
talk to me about race or gender I’m sad
it’s the real life but I remind them
because it’s a positive thing cool but
let me tell you about the person that’s
ranked 7 billion in the world they have
it bad and so I just I struggle like I
want to run like I uh listen I’m a weird
I think about things like animals like I
don’t know like if you’re the best
elephant
we are still better than you
like you know like without really listen
you know I got hot on this about a year
ago the four hundred trillion to one
it’s impossible to be a human being you
one I don’t know how to get upset after
that I keep in perspective right like
you’re gonna learn from this you’ve got
I promise you it’s failing cuz you and
and when you start owning your and not
blaming other people and I think this is
the kick I’ve been on lately on
Instagram right like blame yourself you
know I’m always happy I blame myself
when you blame yourself for real you’re
gonna always be happy because you don’t
feel like somebody else controls you I
went from zero never had been paid for a
speech to literally the most booked
woman in the world in three years flat
crazy there’s a number of reasons why
number one the contents terrific I’m
also a really good public speaker
there’s not a lot of women on the
circuit but more importantly I behave in
a way because I know that the number one
asset and business is make the people
you’re dealing with know that they
matter take care of everybody you deal
with everybody the event planners
speaking bureaus everybody has something
that they’re worried about you get rid
of the worry you make them feel like
they’re important everybody wants to be
around you because at the end of the day
we all want to know that we matter so if
you do business with people that make
you feel good you want to do more
business with them and so it’s a really
really simple thing I called my
philosophy about human beings is just be
a fan just cheer for everybody there’s
so much success to go around people have
really difficult lives they make things
really hard for themselves make their
life easy make them feel great give them
a hug smile complement be generous don’t
be a pain in the ass like literally it’s
that simple it’s a very natural process
to begin something to be very excited
and then as you go down that process to
realize yeah I actually don’t like this
it’s not giving me as much energy as I
thought it would is taking energy away
and therefore I want to give up and quit
that thing and she said if you do that
once or twice like hey so be it but if
you’re doing it every time if you just
love that initial rush that excitement
of something new but the actual
nitty-gritty
reality of getting good at it of doing
what Mitch you Kaku calls having but
power meaning you’ve set your butt in
the seat and you do the work if that’s
really your problem
and nothing is interesting enough for
you to sit there and do the work you
haven’t developed grit yet and so grit
is the ability to persevere to see
things through to go past the point at
which it has stopped being fun and it
becomes boring because you believe in
your end goal enough you’re excited by
what you’re trying to accomplish so much
that you’re willing to fight through all
of that difficulty you’re willing to
fight through the boredom you’re willing
to fight through the unease that arises
when you step outside your comfort zone
you’re doing things you’re not good at
and things that are boring those are the
two things that I find kill most people
they just cannot handle the things that
make them go oh god like I’m not very
good at this and I’m feeling really
badly about myself and they forget that
they can get good on a long enough
timeline and then too inevitably in any
pursuit of greatness in any endeavor
where you’re trying to gain mastery
you’re gonna get bored because practice
is repetition it’s doing something over
and over and over and over to really
train yourself to get to the point where
you’re truly exceptional and there’s
just so much boredom inherent in that
process so building in the resilience to
see all that stuff through is the key
part of grit everyone that’s out there
grinding working driving trucks pouring
concrete hammering on a project building
bridges or building software sewing some
garments or sewing of field farmers
factory workers engineers electricians
plumbers and pilots and ground crew and
cooks and waitresses to everyone out
there working hard and listening to this
and just trying to get yourself a little
thanks for listening and as you meet
struggles and as you struggle to stay on
the path first of all remember you don’t
have to fight alone reach out to your
comrades in arms call for fire support
when you need it we win wars because we
stick together and when we stick
together we can overcome any enemy and
the struggles that you face when they
when they do try to flank you do what
Jodie did do what a soldier does turned
into the ambush turn toward the enemy
fire and attack every time I’m having
trouble every time I’m like man I don’t
think I can get to where I’m going I
just started looking at the top I don’t
look at the bad facts all I do is I
start searching tell me about wealthy
people facts about wealthy people
anything what are they doing what are
they buying it just gets me out of my
problem right it gets me to think bigger
you know the first plane I bought I
bought this plane because I saw other
wealthy people making moves I’m not an
irresponsible person okay like I have
always been a very frugal person but the
frugal was hurting me
not helping me your network is your net
worth how rich you can get has something
to do with who you’re hanging with how
rich you can think has something to do
with you who you’re hanging with okay
how smart you are has something to do
with your surroundings if you hang out
with dumb people you go end up dumb if
you hang out with junkies you’re going
to end up being a junkie you hang out
with criminals I’m not talking about two
people to go to jail I’m talking about
all the people it’s your office right
now they cheat their employer and cheat
themselves you hang out with creme
crimps you end being a creme if you want
to build a network number one thing
commit to building a network a network
by definite
not if you’re building a new it Network
it’s not the people you’re already with
it’s how do I add people to my network
so number one you got to commit to
building a network number two who do you
want in the network who is it
most of you just go for more people like
you have already in your network I want
new people new characters new
personalities new thinking new ideas
the old adage if you’re the smartest
person in the room you in the wrong room
and number three when you start building
this network up and you start meeting
the people ok number two is who do you
want to meet who who you and Anthony met
network you go 9,000 people in a room
you don’t need to meet all 9,000 you
need to meet maybe a list of 30 or 40
people who do you want to meet number 3
when you meet them focus on them not on
you it shouldn’t be here’s my card
I’m a chiropractor this is what I do can
I give you an adjustment it should be
like who are you how can I help you what
are you doing where do you live ok what
projects are you working on how can I
help you you can’t overcome the feelings
that are rising up Langley but you can
take action despite them that’s a very
important distinction that I want each
and every one of you to understand the
things that you’re feeling clenching up
feeling like you’re not good enough
feeling like you’re not ready doubting
yourself kind of spending too much time
thinking about how much time you’ve
wasted all that that’s normal that we
all do you cannot overcome those
thoughts because they keep rising up and
they’ve become a habit and it’s sort of
a pattern so I don’t want you to focus
on the thoughts I want you to focus on
taking action even though you doubt
yourself you are gonna feel like an
impostor until you push through that
clenched up moment over and over and
over again and then suddenly through
action language
you’re gonna see that you’re not an
impostor at all you’re actually the kind
of person that pushes through and does
what he or she says they are going to do
if you want to be successful in business
if you truly want that side hustle to
turn into your full-time thing you have
to learn how to let the feelings of
doubt rise up but take action anyway
everyone gets hammered man everyone gets
knocked down you get a you miss a close
someone changes their mind yeah you get
rejected and interview you you lose your
baseball career over the hell it is it’s
not whether you’re getting knocked down
it’s not even whether you get up
everybody eventually gets up everybody
gets up yeah it’s the time you’re on
your ass it’s the time you stay on the
mat so what happened was my dream got
squashed instead of laying around for
six or eight months I was up immediately
like that day off the mat now my eyes
are open your eyes are closed when
you’re on the mat yeah yeah so the
longer you stay on the mat just because
you’ve been defeated you’ve now become
blinded as you said and it’s prevented
from getting any other opportunity or
blessings in your life so the key is
getting your butt up like literally
getting up and opening your eyes again
and chasing again you’re gonna get up so
you might as well do it now I think of
your average you play into the situation
you know I just had so like let’s say
it’s perceived as negative like you go
there you know you go with oh he hating
on me or she hating on me I’ll give you
a prime example when I was average I saw
my wife’s treatment of my gift as
opposition like oh she ain’t supported
me you know I’m saying like Oh am I here
speaking you know I’m saying like every
time I speak secret teaching me you know
she never said none positive about my
presentation like every time I get off
stage if it’s the best that I thought I
ever did she like what you should have
done this you shouldn’t have said that
like come on you know better than that
you didn’t I’m just like yo what’s up
like where’s the support you know that
was average you know great was she going
to work when I’m working on becoming
I should go to work everyday so she
supported you you got health insurance
because she had health insurance
she got a 401k she’s built up a bank
account
she got a phenomenal credit score and
got us a house with her credit score
saying no but when I was average it was
like you’re not doing what I want you to
do but when I became great I realized
you know I already got 40 people that
just said that was a phenomenal message
you don’t get better by people telling
you what you did right and get better by
watching the film you get better by
critiquing yourself so here’s a person
who’s brave enough to critique me
because somebody else might have thought
the same thing but they weren’t gonna
say none to me about it you know I’m
saying so just looking at the situation
like you know don’t look at it average
people look at you know what it is they
don’t critical think they don’t analyze
they don’t they don’t they don’t unpack
you know what I’m saying like they just
see that’s blue and not go deeper into
well actually that could be whatever it
is yellow and purple whatever colors big
blue like this is what this really is so
for me average taking everything as it
was
you know victim phenomenal Victoire and
seeing possibilities seeing beyond you
know what surf is that to me that’s one
of the characteristics that determine a
person who’s average versus somebody
who’s great how did you stay motivated
all the time people ask me that all the
time and the answer is I did it and
neither did you to become successful the
separator in life is really important
thing the most inspired motivated person
wins nah not really
it’s the person who can work on the
day’s they’re not inspired and motivated
it’s what do you do when you’re not
feeling great what do you do when it’s
not your best day how do you do that
carries you through as rituals and
habits so when you’re fatigued when
you’re tired when you’re under pressure
you react reflexively and so successful
people rely on habits and rituals not
just their inspiration and motivation
level of course we’re both professionals
and being motivated and inspired but
that’s not every day every minute and so
what do I do I work on the days because
my habits and rituals carry me through
and so for me here’s how I look at my
life in my day if I can control the
first 30 minutes of my day
in the last 30 minutes of my day I have
a whole lot better chance of the middle
of my day being controlled and so I’m a
freak about the first 30 minutes of
every day it’s really about the first 45
minutes and I’m obsessive about the last
45 minutes of every single day
that gives me some illusion in my mind
and measure of control the other thing
it does it delivers to me habits and
rituals that serve me that I do every
day that are consistent it gives me
comfort in stormy times that ocean out
there is raging at the top right now
right the waves are crashing at the
bottom of that ocean it’s completely
calm at the bottom of that ocean is the
habitual part of the water right it’s
the list if the part of the were that
stays the most consistent that’s why
it’s so calm okay so when you see
someone out of control their emotions
are up and down all the time this is
someone who is without rituals and
habits successful people have those and
so they do and so it keeps me calm it
keeps me comfortable first 45 years for
sure I was completely lost and somewhere
between 45 and 51 I started figuring out
okay what am i doing I started sorting
my life out I started getting some
started doing some courses that really
really made a difference in my life I’ve
always been in a self-improvement my
whole life and but it wasn’t until I was
about 45 that I really started
discovering information that could make
me more confident me more sure you know
when I was 25 years old was a young
salesperson and I didn’t like sales and
I and I got educated on how to sell and
I became very very good at it I started
to understand the process the customer
the objections the rebuttal is how to
follow up how to handle the rejection
and the disappointment that discouraged
how to get over but that didn’t help me
become more confident in me as a person
as an individual I was making money by
the time I was 31 I had a couple
businesses they were making money
probably had you know three four hundred
thousand dollars saved when I was thirty
31 years old because I was trying to
make a little money right by the time
I’m 33 I got it probably a million
dollars in a bank I still didn’t feel
good about myself
I’m just nagging nagging like sense of
desperation and satis depression
when I started working on me spiritually
that’s that’s when that’s when at 45 46
47 years old that’s when everything
changed for me like everything all the
expansion the the confidence getting out
in the world maybe a little better
communicating than I was doing I’m not
perfect at it by any means now and I
started getting more certainty about Who
I am what I am where I’m going and why
I’m here like if you don’t figure those
things out no amount of money no amount
of money in the world will will fill you
up
no the private planes won’t the fancy
cars you have to know where you’re going
start learning personal development
right you know Tony Robbins and and and
and all of a sudden my mind is opened up
into my surroundings of the people
around me who do I need to cut out
because they’re cancerous versus who I
need to spend more time with because I
need a rise to their level
and all of a sudden I realize holy cow
man these these are built-in coaches as
a personal trainer one-on-one your
clients are typically the affluent
people right right so I started asking
all my my clients in between workouts
right you know a little business advice
here a little business advice there and
I found it these are people who practice
one guy’s got a software company next
guy this automotive company right rental
cars public storage places and man it
was just the best advice versus taking
advice from a family member or friend
who goes I heard it on Shark Tank it’s
not practicing it wasn’t experienced it
yeah so that’s the big thing is to take
advice from someone who’s been there and
done that and and if they they’re
consulting in your industry but they
come from a different industry I would
tread cautiously yeah okay
yeah but you think everyone should have
a coach I believe so I think so too
as athletes we have coaches try to do it
on your own
no no if you’ve dealt with trauma in
your life whether it’s some kind of
physical abuse sexual abuse whatever
neglect as a kid you go to a therapist a
good therapist is a coach yes
right you’ve got personal development
random bouchard’s why not have business
coaches why not have high performance
coaches if you’ve got limiting beliefs
why not have someone resent your
thermostat that mom and dad had set so
low Yeah right
or circumstance of growing up it’s that
so low we’re in it we can’t see the
trees yeah I look at it as a coach a
good coach is in a helicopter saying you
know you see a lot of trees but I know
if you go up 50 yards that way and then
10 yards that way you’ve got an open
path be open up yeah that’s it that’s
what a coach does he buy you time they
buy you speed that buy you success you
are probably at the most dangerous part
of your life he’s like dad I’ve got
three months and I graduated from
college like I work with Tom Izzo you
know I want a dad I went nearly eight
bring a final four ring dad I got a job
offer of a lifetime and I was like
that’s the problem I’m like everything
you’ve ever dreamed of you are three
months away so what happens three months
and one day like you have nothing son
like I said so what you have to do for
me is now I need you to start all over
from scratch I need you to come up with
what’s the next four years look like
what’s the next round I’m like is it
getting the 800 credit score is it
saving $250,000 is it finding the girl
of your dream and getting married you
know
is it buying a house helping your mom
buy pay for your sister to go to school
my son I don’t care what it is
but you don’t understand this is
dangerous because this is where people
mess up they get comfortable they saddle
and they think yo I made it like you
said that’s the worst place in the world
so I told my son like yo just imagine in
three months you’re gonna wake up and
every dream you’ve had since you were 6
or 7 years old
it’s who graduates with the dream job
you know who lives in New York who’s a
man he’s gonna be in Manhattan Times
Square you know so I said son this is a
dangerous place so I say to those
individuals yeah you’re right
you don’t want to hit rock bottom but
you have to create your own mental rock
bottom so that you don’t hit rock bottom
persuasion anything so if you want to
persuade your children
if you want to persuade someone to take
a look at your faith if you want to
persuade someone in business if you want
to persuade someone to help you in
anything or help them in anything it’s
real simple for me
monster belief and so you can’t transfer
to me that which you’re not experiencing
yourself right so you can’t give me a
people always tryna cope with a magic
word the magic clothes the magic this
and there are words you shouldn’t
shouldn’t use in persuasion no question
about it right there are think there are
words that are more effective in other
words and clearly to be successful in
any business you need to know what those
words are in your business the best
persuaders the best motivators the best
speakers the best physicians the best
school teachers the best parents are
incredible persuaders and what they do
is they come from a monster place of
conviction and belief that they can
transfer you to because people respond
to energy much more than they do words
they respond to what they feel not what
they hear and see here and see a real
low level influencers energy spirit
transfer of energy is what people
respond to and so I’m cognizant all the
time of getting in a state of total
belief and certainty about what it is
that I’m gonna represent or speaking if
I’m speaking on stage about a particular
topic and then transferring that energy
into people and that seems generic or
hokey but it’s actually what great
persuaders do in fact if you’re
listening to this you think of anybody
that you know who’s incredibly
persuasive they may have great words
they probably do but it’s something you
feel from them right and that’s the
difference between a great doctor and a
so-so doctor great doc says here’s the
prescription you’re out of here another
one is they kind of work or not I don’t
know the other one you leave there
feeling that you’re going to be healed
settling you’re in good hands you feel
their certainty you feel their
confidence saying when you hear a
speaker if you’re buying real estate
from somebody but it’s not just buying
things it’s a great pastor in a church a
great person if you do TM who’s taught
you TM it’s there’s certainty it’s the
energy you feel and so for me it’s
always getting to I have to really
believe what I’m saying I have to really
feel it to transfer to find what you’re
looking for I’ve been giving a lot of
thought to kind of just watching what
I’m seeing out there in the social
digital ecosystem and very honestly just
real life
and I’m watching so many people over the
last two to three years look for
negativity look for something that’s
wrong
find where people disagree with them
fight look for what was me downside the
half glass empty and and then I go to a
Twitter search or look around the world
and I find ridiculously beautiful things
every day every day thousands of kind
acts randomly by people all people that
I have conversations with who see the
opportunities whether it’s in business
like voice and AR or crypto or whatever
it may be just this amazingly
interesting thing that I feel the
majority of you are looking for the
wrong while there’s a plenty of wrong
and plenty of right in the world it
comes down to one very simple thing what
are you choosing to look for because I
promise you if you right now and I’m
making this video for one reason 24
hours of trying to find the good
somebody saves a kid somebody opens the
door somebody does a nice thing for you
bid somebody system thank you 24 hours
of looking for positivity could change
your life honestly making this for one
person one one person watches this video
chooses to do 24 hours of looking for
good instead of looking for bad and
their game changes d-roc heard somebody
at a convenience store saying mom you’re
always so negative you’re always so
negative I am blown away by the fact
that life gets real simple if you break
down into this are you looking for the
negative this sucks this government
sucks this person sucks this is are you
looking for the positive she’s nice
that’s remarkable I’ve got this
opportunity you choose what you’re
looking for because what you look for you find that’s how life works
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