the question isn’t can you handle the
situation the question is can you handle
your mind
[Music]
can you manage the thoughts and the
emotions that are trying to poison your
progress
forget managing the situation
manage your mind no matter whose fault
it is that something is broken if it’s
it’s not somebody’s fault if their
father was an abusive alcoholic but it’s
for damn sure their responsibility to
figure out how they’re gonna do with
those traumas and try to make a life out
it’s not your fault if your partner
cheated and ruined your marriage but it
is for damn sure your responsibility to
figure out how to take that pain and how
to overcome that and build a happy life
fault and responsibility do not go
together his socks but they don’t was
something as somebody’s fault we want
to suffer we want them punished we want
them to pay we want it to be their
responsibility to fix it but that’s
that’s not how it works especially when
it’s your heart your heart your life
your happiness your responsibility
fear
[Music]
the only place that fear can exist is in
it is a product of our imagination
causing us to fear things that do not at
present and may not ever exist as long
as we’re pointing a finger and and stuck
in whose fault
something is we’re jamming and trapped
into victim mode when you’re in victim
mode you’re stuck in suffering the road
to power is in taking responsibility
your heart your life your happiness is
your responsibility and your
responsibility alone
I and I learned very young from parents
from my parents absolutely that you you
don’t try to build a wall you don’t set
out to build a wall you don’t say I’m
gonna bake this build the biggest
baddest greatest wall that’s ever been
built you don’t start there you say I’m
gonna lay this brick as perfectly as a
brick can be laid there will not be one
brick on the face of the earth that’s
gonna be laid better than this brick
then I’m gonna lay in this next ten
minutes and you do that every single day
and so you know as soon you have a wall
and I think psychologically the
advantage that that gives me over over a
lot of people that I’ve have been in
competition with in different situations
is it’s difficult to take the first step
when you look how big yeah the task is
the task is never huge to me it’s always
mean one Brett me too I mean it is
amazing how if you know people are
paralyzed mm-hmm from doing anything
absolutely because they can’t take the
first step whereas you just say look all
I’m doing is laying this one brick I’m
not building the Great Wall of China
putting a brick here and I’m gonna have
the best brick I can and your father I
think I retire early had you and your
brother mm-hmm work on a model oh yeah
yeah we that we’re talking about our
figurative wall that comes from work on
a literal one yeah right my father owned
it actually was an old bakery when I was
growing up my my father was a an
electrician and a refrigeration man we
would install supermarkets you see the
long freezer cases in supermarkets we
would install those long freezing cases
and all the lights that’s what we that’s
what we would do every summer yeah so
this is one year my father had his shop
and he decided for whatever reason that
he wanted a new wall on the front of his
shop so he tore down probably about you
know 16 feet high and probably about 30
feet long he just completely tore
the wall down and my brother and I had
to dig a six-foot hole we were the mix a
ship for the foundation we were mixing
the concrete by hand a year and a half
we were building this wall for a year
and a half every day after school we
would come in mixing concrete put it in
the hole doing it and it was just myself
and my little brother and I remember
standing back looking at that wall
saying there’s going to be a hole here
forever a year and a half later that
many days I know a year and a half later
we laid the the final brick and my
father stood back with my brother and I
and I know he plan as he says he thought
he says he didn’t but I know he had been
planning this and rightness for the past
two years but he we stood back we looked
at the wall and he looked at me and my
brother says now don’t y’all never tell
me you can’t do something and walked
into the shop the child my parents
always told me you could be whatever you
want to be you could do whatever you
want to do and you know that that office
that position of the highest office on
the face of the earth it was something I
heard my parents saying it but I didn’t
totally believe it yet I went out in the
world and I carried myself and I held my
head high and I stood there and I look
people in their eyes and I talked to
people as if I was deserving of
so I just I really want to say to two
children out there and to two people who
are watching Confucius said one time he
who says he can and he who says he can’t
are both usually right so I want to
stand here before you and as I hold this
award I want to give love to my wife and
I want you to keep in your heart just
know that you can know that you can
concept that I would suggest to people
to take a daily confrontation with his
fear the the the problem with fear is
that it lies right so fear tells you hey
you know if if you say that to that girl
she’s gonna know she has you you know
and she’ll never really be attracted to
you if she knows how much you attracted
to her don’t say that know how we get
her is when she walks by ignore her for
me the the daily confrontation with fear
has become a real practice for me since
about three three years ago I went I
went skydiving in Dubai right and
skydiving skydiving is a really
interesting confront with fear right so
so I got I got a stand all right so so
all your friends what happens you go out
how you oh sorry
all right drop my thing so what happens
is you go out the night before and you
you know you take a drink with your
friends and somebody says yeah we should
go skydiving tomorrow and you go yeah
we’ll go skydiving or yeah
[Applause]
Yeah right and you go home but you by
yourself you like me right you’re like
well I mean they was drunk too right so
so maybe maybe they not maybe maybe I
mean we don’t have to go we don’t have
to do it so then that night you’re
laying in your bed and you just keep and
you’re terrified you keep imagining over
and over again jumping out of an
airplane and you can’t figure out why
you would do that right and you’re
laying there and you have the worst
night’s sleep of your life but you still
have the hope that your friends were
drunk
right so you wake up the next day and
you go you know down you said where you
were going to meet and everybody’s there
you’re like alright cool cool cool cool
cool cool right so you get in a van and
you don’t know that your friends had the
same night that you had cuz they’re
pretending like they didn’t it like yeah
man my uncle is a Navy SEAL and you know
this is gonna be great I’ve been looking
forward to this you like oh my god oh my
god and your stomach is terrible you
can’t eat and everything but you don’t
want to be the only punk who doesn’t
jump out of this airplane so you get
there and then you have this safety
brief and you’re standing there and the
guys that tell you what the chute
doesn’t open what’s gonna happen is
you’re doing your BA to help with what
could happen that the shoe the shoe
wouldn’t open right so you do a thing
and what you do is your first jump
you’re attached to a guy who is going
you know he’s gonna walk you out so you
go and you get there and there’s an
airplane and nobody stopping everybody’s
still going so you get onto the airplane
and you’re sitting there and and you
know it’s extra because you’re sitting
on some dudes lap some stranger you know
you got trying to make small talk yeah
so you deal usually you be jumping with
people all the time right you know
what’s so and then you just want to make
sure you got you got kids right you got
people you need to see right just want
to make sure he’s serious right so you
get in there
so everything’s normal so you fly and
you go up you go up you go up you go up
to 14,000 feet and you notice there’s a
light it’s red and it’s yellow and green
right so right now the lights red so
then you start thinking at some point
the lights going to go green it but you
don’t know what’s going to happen right
and you wait and it goes yellow and the
light goes green and somebody opens the
door and in that moment you realize
you’ve never been in a freaking airplane
with the door open right terror oh sorry
I’m Spit terror terror terror terror
right so you go and then you know if
you’re if you were smart you sat in the
back so you don’t go first
right and then people start going out of
the airplane and you go and the guy
walks you up to the end of the thing and
you’re standing and your toes are on the
edge and you’re looking out down to
death and they say on three and they say
one two and he pushes you on too because
people grab one three and you go
and you fall out of the airplane and in
one second you realize that it’s the
most blissful experience of your life
you’re flying right it doesn’t feel like
falling right it’s like that you
actually are kind of held a little bit
about a win and then you start and you
you start falling you falling and you
there’s zero fear you realize at the
point of maximum danger is the point of
minimum fear
right you’re doing it and then 20
seconds 25 seconds 40 seconds and you
have enough time to just kind of like ah
that’s the building that’s not like that
[Music]
right you start doing all that and the
the lesson for me was why were you
scared in your bed the night before why
did you what do you need that fear for
just don’t go why are you scared in your
bed
16 hours before you jump why are you
scared in the car why could you not
enjoy breakfast what would what did you
need that fear is fear of what you’re
know where to even near the airplane
everything’s up to the stepping out
there’s actually no reason to be scared
it only just ruins your day you don’t
have to jump and then in that moment all
of a sudden where you should be
terrified is the most blissful
experience of your life and God placed
the best things in life on the other
side of terror on the other side of your
maximum fear or all of the best things
in life separation of talent and skill
is one of the the the greatest
misunderstood concepts for people who
are trying to excel who have dreams that
want to do things talent you have
naturally skill is only developed by
hours and hours and hours of beating on
your craft for me
it has been the to be that guy that does
what people say can’t be done you know
and I think it started with trying to
please my mother and trying to please my
grandmother and they always wanted
higher for me they always wanted more
for me and it got to the point that I
wanted to be something I wanted to be
somebody and it it made me choose
certain roles it made me turn down
certain roles there is more than an
image that I want to project I want to
be the person that is the first person
there and the last person to leave
that’s who I want to be because I think
that the the road to success is through
commitment and through the strength to
drive through that commitment when it
gets hard and it is going to get hard
and you’re gonna want to quit sometimes
but it’ll be colored by who you are
and more who you want to be I definitely
found
wanting to be an actor stems from
wanting to be somebody and wanting to
say something to people never really
viewed myself as particularly talented
where I excel is ridiculous sickening
work ethic you know while the other guys
sleeping I’m working what other guys
eaten I’m working concept of improving
lives runs through the center of
everything I do and then I realize that
the the way to improve lives is to
continually improve yourself right so
with that every every morning when I
when I get out of the bed you know I I
haven’t fixed everything in the world
yet so there’s always something to do
and in this film I read an interesting
quote the Siddhartha Gautama the Buddha
he said that good people have to get out
of the bed every day and try to empty
the ocean with a ladle right and I
thought that was you know I knew that
was profound and I paused for a second
and I said all right what the hell is a
ladle right right so there you know I
just I touched it on my iPad is ladle oh
so trying to empty the ocean with a soup
spoon you know as the the mentality of
how you you wake up every day to try to
do good in the world so for me I’m I’m
really driven by continually trying to
elevate my elevate my mind and elevate
my spirit and care for my body and to be
able to love as many people as
effectively as as possible with this
mystery of life that I’ve been given
there’s no easy way around it no matter
how talented you are your talent is
going to fail you if you’re not skilled
you know if you don’t study if you don’t
work really hard and dedicate yourself
to being better every single day
you’ll never be able to communicate with
with people with your artistry the way
that you want certain delusional quality
that all successful people have to have
you have to believe that something
different than what has happened for the
last 50 million years of history you
have to believe that something different
can happen it’s almost a kind of
innocence absolutely in other words if
you knew how difficult it was right you
have never gone down that path
absolutely somebody said to our league
no one can beat this guy he’s this much
stronger this much bigger he’s got that
much bigger punch than you do and he
believed that he would have said never
you gotta have an innocence it somehow
absolutely and I think they did that’s a
huge part of me because and I say to my
friends all the time and we laugh about
it I truly honestly as I sit here before
you right now
honestly as I can say to you I truly
believe that I could be the president if
I wanted to and as bizarre as that may
sound to people that have traveled the
path before me and to people who
actually know how difficult it is
foolish Will Smith honestly believes
it’s the only thing that I see that is
distinctly different about me is I’m not
afraid to die on a treadmill you might
have more talent than me you might be
smarter than me but if we get on the
treadmill together right there’s two
things you’re getting off first or I’m
gonna die it’s really that simple
anytime you inject extremes into the
universe you can expect extremes to to
come back I think that you know one of
the best pieces of advice I ever got was
don’t let your successes go to your head
and don’t let your failures go to your
heart do you follow that
I try it’s absolutely a difficult even
more so now with my my wife and my
children expanding into it the the scope
of it is actually becoming more
difficult to manage the things that
almost in a spiritual sense the things
that you attract to yourself and also if
you think about it in terms of altitude
the higher you go the harder it is to
breathe there’s less oxygen and I think
within that phrase what I get from that
with marlon brando but what happens is
if you think about it in terms of
mountain climbing mountain climbing the
higher and the higher you get the less
oxygen there is the harder it is to
breathe as you get to this successful
space and the first thing people want to
do is get down and what you do by
getting down
is self-destructive and I’m just working
hard to make sure that I don’t allow the
lack of oxygen to dull my appreciation
for the gifts up again
he didn’t grow up with the sense that
where we were was where we were going to
be you know we grew up with the sense
that where we were almost didn’t matter
I’m motivated by fear fear you know
fear of what fear of fear
I hate being scared to do something I
hate that feeling of the feeling that I
had before I had a meeting with Quincy
Jones because there’s really Quincy
Jones and a guy named Benny Medina I
know
and Jeff Pollan came with the idea for
the Fresh Prince of bel-air and I hate
it being scared you know that I didn’t
want to
to even take the meeting there were
there were opportunities during when I
first my first year as a rapper Bill
Cosby and the people in The Cosby Show
had seen my music video and called me to
your character to come right and try out
for the Cosby Show and just every time
it was set up for some reason I couldn’t
make it the therapy the fear I hate it I
just hated that being scared to do
something and I think what developed in
my in my early days was the the attitude
that I started attacking things that I
was scared greatness is not this
wonderful esoteric illusive godlike
feature that only the special among us
will ever taste you know it’s something
that truly exists in all of us it’s very
simple this is what I believe and I’m
willing to die for it period it’s that
simple I Know Who I am
I don’t know what I believe I Know Who I
am I know who all I need to know so from
there you do what you need to do you
know and I think what happens is we make
this situation more complex than it has
been looking for complexities it’s got
to be something complex to understand it
can’t be that easy duration of talent
and skill is one of the the the greatest
misunderstood concepts for people who
are trying to excel who have dreams that
want to do things talent you have
naturally skill is only developed by
hours and hours and hours of beating on
your craft the road to success is
through commitment and through the
strength to drive through that
commitment when it gets hard and it is
going to get hard and you’re gonna want
to quit sometimes but it’ll be colored
by who you are
and more who you want to be I definitely
found that wanting to be an actor stems
from wanting to be somebody and wanting
to say something to people there’s no
easy way around it no matter how
talented you are your talent is going to
fail you if you’re not skilled you know
if you don’t study if you don’t work
really hard and dedicate yourself to
being better every single day you’ll
never be able to communicate with with
people I was just having a debate with a
friend of mine and we got stuck on the
difference between fault and
responsibility she kept talked about how
something was somebody’s fault
somebody’s fault and I was like it
really don’t matter whose fault it is
that something is broken if it’s your
responsibility to fix it not somebody’s
fault if their father was an abusive
alcoholic but it’s for damn sure their
responsibility to figure out how they’re
gonna do with those traumas and try to
make a life out of it it’s not your
fault
if your partner cheated and ruined your
marriage but it is for damn sure your
responsibility to figure out how to take
that pain and how to overcome that and
build a happy life for yourself fault
and responsibility do not go together it
sucks but they don’t when something is
somebody’s fault we want them to suffer
we want them punished we want them to
pay and we want it to be their
responsibility to fix it but that’s
that’s not how it works especially when
it’s your heart your heart your life
your happiness is your responsibility
and your responsibility alone the
longest we’re pointing a finger and and
stuck in whose fault
something is we’re jammed and trapped
into victim mode when you’re in victim
oh you’re stuck in suffering the road to
power is in taking responsibility your
heart your life your happiness is your
responsibility and your responsibility
alone
me a personal confrontation with death
made me see the value of time and the
fact that the only elixir is love the
the time that you spend has got to be in
preparing yourself and giving and
receiving the most amount of love you
can you know my mission is to improve
lives so I want to do things that put
positivity and positive energy and love
into the world you know I’ve always been
really product oriented you know it’s
like I want to win when I do something I
want to win I want it to be number one
and I want to smash it you have a
daughter and I was a 15 year old
daughter and she really she got me and
shifted my focus from product to people
it took a couple of years but as soon as
I gotten knocked off of product and
started shifting to people the whole
world opened up for me again and acting
opened up in a whole new way to not go
into day one of a movie trying to figure
out what everybody has to do so we win
versus opening up and every person’s a
new it’s a whole new world generally
when I went into a product when I went
into a meeting with director my focus
was can this guy win can this girl win
the pathology that got broken for me a
couple of years ago and then releasing
that and just wanting to connect with
people and wanting to grow and wanted to
get new ideas and have new experiences
that don’t have to have an outcome they
just opened up a whole new world for me
and I fell in love and then I couldn’t
imagine what else I could do in acting
that could add so much to my life other
than acting difference between
depression and joy right and I think
it’s purpose when you wake up in the
morning and your life means something to
somebody other than you that you have a
purpose
if you don’t go do the things that
you’re going to do people’s lives will
suffer too
live-in service not to you but to live
in service to humanity to live in
service to your family to live in
service to your church to your city to
your country to the world living in
service is that I feel like that is the
purest form of joy the taking
responsibility accepting responsibility
is not an admission of guilt you’re not
admitting that your fault
taking responsibility is a recognition
of the power that you sees when you stop
blaming people it’s not like you’re
letting somebody who wronged you off the
hook like taking responsibility as an
act of emotional self-defense
taking responsibility is taking your
power back I look at the world through a
lens of comedy my natural reaction is
always no matter when something happens
and I can’t even help it it’s why is
that funny you know so even at a funeral
I can’t help but think why that’s funny
extremely helpful for me just
psychologically that no matter what’s
going on I can’t keep my mind from
finding joke a beautiful way to stay
joyous and positive I live in complete
terror everything for me about this
business and a you know about what I’ve
been trying to build and what I’ve been
trying to do with my life keeps me in
terror I’m I am deeply motivated by fear
I’m trying to to develop a more
realistic perspective of what this
business is when I was 15 years old my
first girlfriend cheated on me oh and I
remember making a decision that nobody
would ever cheat on me again and the way
I was going to do that is by being the
biggest actor on earth ah right so is
there’s there’s been this weird
psychology that I’ve always felt like if
my movies are number one my life is
gonna work out great
I’ve always been
the type of person who thought of I
thought of myself as resilient you know
that I could always make my way back
being stuck in the past is a it makes it
extremely difficult to find your way out
and future thinking for me has always
been the way to get over difficult times
to be able to look over the darkness to
a potential time of light very rarely do
I look backwards I’m always looking
forward you know to me showbiz is not
separated from the rules of the universe
whether you’re in show business or you
know you’re selling cars or you’re
farming you know you’re not you’re not
separate from the laws of the universe
and all of the rules are the same
everywhere from my children the most
important thing is that they be
encouraged to fully and thoroughly be
themselves no matter what when you when
you have yourself and you’re thorough
and confident in who you are you can
survive anywhere
there’s a certain delusional quality
that all successful people have to have
you have to believe that something
different than what has happened for the
last 52 million years of history you
have to believe that something different
can happen it’s almost a kind of
innocence absolutely in other words if
you knew how difficult it was right you
have never gone down that path
absolutely no and somebody said to Holly
no one can beat this guy he’s this much
stronger as this much bigger he’s got
that much bigger punch than you do and
he believed that he would have said
never have an innocence that somehow
absolutely no and I think they dead
that’s a huge part of me because and I
say to my friends all the time and we
laugh about it I truly honestly as I sit
here before you right now as honestly as
I can say it to you I truly believe that
I could be the president if I wanted to
and as bizarre as that may sound to
people that have traveled the path
before me and to people who actually
know how difficult it is foolish Will
I feel very strongly that we are who we
choose to be consider myself an
alchemist an alchemist is basically a
mystical chemist one of the great feats
that alchemists used to do is they would
take lead
just take a chunk of lead and they could
turn lead into gold being able to turn
lead into gold you know my grandmother
used to say you know life give your
lemon you go ahead and make lemonade to
me that’s that’s alchemy that’s that
that’s the same concept behind the the
alchemists
you don’t set out to build a wall you
don’t say I’m gonna bake this build the
biggest baddest greatest wall that’s
ever been built you don’t start there
you say I’m gonna lay this brick as
perfectly as a brick can be laid there
will not be one brick on the face of the
earth that’s gonna be laid better than
this brick then I’m gonna lay in this
next ten minutes and you do that every
single day and so you have a soon you
have a wall it’s difficult to take the
first step when you look how big yeah
the task is the task is never huge to me
it’s always you need one brick I don’t
want to be an icon I realized that when
you to have the level of success that I
want to have it’s difficult to spread it
out and do multiple things you know it’s
in order to to be world-class and I’ve
made a decision I want to be world-class
and it just it takes such a desperate
obsessive focus to to excel on assert
honor on the level that I want to make
movies you know I was a Star Wars when I
was young i sat in the movie theater and
watched Star Wars and I just couldn’t
believe that that movie made me feel
like that just floored and just stunned
by the creativity and just I’m realizing
that in order to move people in that way
in order to touch people in that way
you’ve really got to focus with all of
your fiber and all your heart and all
your creativity
you didn’t grow up with the sense that
where we were was where we were going to
be you know we grew up with the sense
that where we were almost didn’t matter
because we were becoming we were
becoming something greater
as a child my parents always told me you
could be whatever you want to be you
could do whatever you want to do it was
something I heard my parents saying it
but I didn’t totally believe it yet I
went out in the world and I carried
myself and I held my head high and I
stood there and I look people in their
eyes and I talked to people as if I was
deserving of everything that this planet
has to offer
confucius said one time he who says he
can and he who says he can’t are both
usually right so i want to stand here
before you and as I hold this award I
want to give love to my wife and I want
you to keep in your heart just know that
you can road to success is through
commitment and through the strength to
drive through that commitment when it
gets hard and it is gonna get hard and
you’re gonna want to quit sometimes but
it’ll be colored by who you are and more
who you want to be I definitely found
that wanting to be an actor stems from
wanting to be somebody separation of
talent and skill is one of the the the
greatest misunderstood concepts for
people who are trying to excel who have
dreams that want to do things talent you
have naturally skill is only developed
by hours and hours and hours of beating
on your craft for me it it has been the
to be that guy that does what people say
can’t be done you know and I think it
started with trying to please my mother
and trying to please my grandmother and
they always wanted higher for me they
always wanted more for me and it got to
the point that I wanted to be something
I wanted to be some
body and it made me choose certain roles
it made me turn down certain roles there
is more than an image that I want to
project I want to be the person that is
the first person there and the last
person to leave never really viewed
myself as particularly talented where I
excel is ridiculous sickening work ethic
you know while the other guys sleeping
I’m working what other guys eaten I’m
working
anytime you inject extremes into the
universe you can expect extremes to to
come back I think that you know one of
the best pieces of advice I ever got was
don’t let your successes go to your head
and don’t let your failures go to your
heart do you follow that I try it’s
absolutely a difficult even more so now
with my my wife and my children
expanding into it the the scope of it is
actually becoming more difficult to
manage the things that almost in a
spiritual sense the things that you
attract to yourself and also if you
think about it in terms of altitude the
higher you go the harder it is to
breathe there’s less oxygen and I think
in that phrase what I get from that with
marlon brando but what happens is if you
think about it in terms of mountain
climbing mountain climbing the higher
and the higher you get the less oxygen
there is the harder it is to breathe as
you get to this successful space and the
first thing people want to do is get
down and what you do by getting down is
self-destructive and i’m just working
hard to make sure that i don’t allow the
lack of
Jen to dull my appreciation for the gifts I’ve been given