the keeper and reiterate er of the
vision because there’s just a tire work
to do and a lot of times you know when
you have to walk a thousand miles and
you take the first step it looks like a
long ways and it really helps if there’s
someone there saying well we’re one step
closer you know that the goal definitely
exists it’s not just a mirage out there
so in a thousand and one little and
sometimes larger ways the vision needs
to be reiterated I do that a lot here’s
what I do specifically to help myself
stay focused first things first when I
wake up in the morning I do not sleep
next to my phone the reason why I don’t
sleep next to my phone is because if you
sleep next to it or use it as your alarm
your tendency is to look at it while
you’re in bed
that means that you’re checking email
before you even thought about what your
priorities are do not do that that’s tip
number one tip number two I have a pad
of post-it notes
yes post-it notes next to my sink in at
my bathroom
because after I brush my teeth haven’t
looked at my phone yet I take a post-it
note out and I write the three things I
need to focus on today and then you know
what I do with it now why would I do
that because I have my phone with me all
the time and so if it’s on the back of
my phone I’m gonna get a visual cue to
remind me and keep it top of mind so I
stay focused on it third thing that I do
it’s a little trick I call 30 before
7:30 what that means I spend 30 minutes
before 7:30 a.m. just focused on getting
my day organized and getting the few of
the things that are my top priorities
either finished or further down the
field so that’s 30 minutes before 7:30
a.m. it’s time for me
if you utilize those three things don’t
sleep with your phone right after you
brush your teeth right on your three
priorities and stick it on the back of
your phone just like this and spend 30
minutes before 7:30 for yourself I
promise you you’ll be shocked and how
much more focused you are and a few
things are packages of emphasis some
things are emphasized in a product some
things are not done as well and a
product some things are chosen not to be
done at all in a product and so
different people make different choices
and if the market tells us we’re making
the wrong choices we listen to the
market we’re just we’re just people
running this company we’re trying to
make great products for people and so
we’re we have at least the courage of
our convictions to say we don’t think
this is part of what makes a great
product we’re gonna leave it out some
people are gonna not like that they’re
gonna call us names it’s not going to be
in certain companies vested interests
that we do that but we’re gonna take the
heat because we want to make the best
product in the world for customers we’re
going to instead focus our energy on
these technologies which we think are in
their ascendency and we think are gonna
be the right technologies for customers
and you know what they’re paying us to
make those choices that’s what a lot of
customers pay us to do is to try to make
the best products we can and if we
succeed they’ll buy them
and if we don’t they won’t NL all work
itself out truth is a powerful us land
you know we will go our own personal
troops then there are certain principles
they’ll help align us all just be true
to your essential self don’t cover
people over and that product yeah it’s a
bit annoying Tesco these do I think’s
really important it’s like you know like
say when I was a kid he was all like a
part I don’t know where’s who stuff and
also would pretend to be sort of angry
about it and obviously I agree with
complete racial integration and racial
quality financially when I was at home
at night I won’t actually I think I say
when I got ripped off like a bus driver
and give me my fare back or when there’s
charges for that stuff really affects me
and impacts me you know so what I think
we have to do is recognize we’re in our
own lives we’ve been ripped off with
them ripping us off left them right you
know like we recognize where those
things are I recognize that those things
are not necessary and when people tell
you they’re there is no alternative look
at the people who are telling you that
there’s a funny story that goes along
with how he came up with the title of
this book and we are all to blame here I
am writing a book about the importance
of working with people interacting with
people human relationships and yet the
way I and the publisher interacted was
we would send emails to each other with
title suggestions every now and we get
on the phone but it was mainly done
through email somebody would send a list
of their favorite and you know somebody
would write back
that’s junk I kind of liked that one and
it was a labored horrible process no one
ever we never agreed when it was just it
was just talking at each other and
coincidence I happen to be walking past
the publishers office and decided to
stick my head in and say hello
went upstairs and we sat down and within
I think 30 or 40 minutes we had a title
that we all fell in love with and what
you realize is is we can tell an idea to
someone over email but you can’t
interact and if you think about how
ideas really happen it’s not
presentation response
it’s interruption and backwards and
forwards and battling and saying no no
that’s not what I mean and it’s it’s
messy and it’s the messiness that cannot
happen over and over an internet
connection over email because everything
is exact over you know it can it can
happen over the phone but it’s so much
better in person when you get to see
someone’s body language and you see the
frustration and you try and explain
yourself and and and we’ve told each
other stories as opposed to telling each
other what we think we it should be and
the story that I told was not being able
to understand what made the Marines so
amazing what they do i sat down with a
Marine Corps general general Flynn
actually who wrote the foreword for the
book and I said to him what makes the
Marines so great and he looked at me and
said officers he blasts and it sort of
struck me that if you compare that to
the business world in the
entrepreneurial world entrepreneurs are
always told yourself first
look after yourself first and yet I’m
being told by this Marine general that
it’s the complete opposite and there’s
there’s a symbolic gesture but more
importantly there’s a there’s an
importance to it there there’s a
photograph I saw you know these Kenya
shootings that just happened not so long
ago we had the amazing experience that a
photographer happened to be in the
building usually we see the aftermath
and here we now have photographs of the
actual shooting going on and there’s one
photograph that was in the New York
Times that both haunted me and inspired
me to this day
it wanted me and inspires me I should
say and it’s the photograph of a mother
and the sound of gunshots lays herself
on top of her child
and you see this picture of a mother
lying on top of her child and you
realize that’s what it is
that’s what leadership is that when
there is danger it’s not protecting
myself but it’s rather willing to put
myself in harm’s way to protect another
that’s what eating the last means it
means that I will give the very the very
essence of life food and water I will
give it to the person I love first so
that they may live even if it means I us
and that’s what officers eat last means
it is symbolic but it is also very real
and real leadership real leaders I’ve
even given up the terminal idea of good
leaders and great leaders you neither a
leader or you’re not a leader that’s it
real leaders biological anthropological
leaders are are that mother who
instinctively without weighing the pros
and cons or the bad things that may
happen to her throw herself on their
child that’s what leadership is you know
do we believe that our our leaders would
throw themselves on us you know if they
heard gunshots if if the economy shook
would they quickly throw themselves on
us
that that’s that’s what leaders eat last
means it is very literal it is very very
literal see the you know the
enlightenment realized state that we’d
like everybody to be in and then we have
this kind of mess this quandary that
we’re in right now so how do we make
those little bridging steps make I think
we attain it within ourselves initially
and we communicate these ideas on a
personal level of spirituality as you’ve
just heard I can be very verbose and
loquacious on the topic but really it
just means being nice it ain’t hard just
be nice you meet a homeless person be
nice you get into a cab be nice to the
person don’t see yourself as adversarial
then the Revolution as always I was
already occured people fear Armageddon
don’t make people fear the apocalypse
don’t know but for some Armageddon has
already occurred the homeless people
that walk our streets live already in a
post-apocalyptic world Armageddon will
surely come for each of us around
personal Armageddon when each of us die
isn’t it redundant whether everyone
simultaneously dies if each of us will
individually die regardless Armageddon
is coming so whilst these cataclysmic
principles apply although an individual
level of people who think we might be
able to extend the human lifespan
through biotechnology merging but what
I’m saying is is that what we have to do
is individually reach and light our own
personal alignment we have to do that
the principles are all there you know
this the principles are already there we
achieve detachment through meditation we
no longer then then we are no once we
live once we can achieve enlightenment
and as once we put our satisfaction
beyond that our individual needs we are
no longer malleable by the pre-existing
system the system requires us to be a
selfish little consumerist pods once we
go on that bothered about that it’s
easier for me to have being famous now I
know that’s boring I’ve been rich now I
know that’s boring loads of people now I
know that’s boring took loads of drugs
now no that’s boring so all that’s left
is spiritual enlightenment
it’s sad to see that people are
disenchanted and nihilistic and
depressed and anxious and aimless and
perverse and vengeful and and all of
those things it’s terrible and then to
see people question whether that’s
necessary and then to start to rise out
of it it’s like it’s so fun like last
night I was at after my talk it’s
overwhelming I don’t usually think about
these things but I was I was after my
talk last night and so all these people
line up and you know they have their 15
15 seconds with me and they’re kind of
tentative they’re excited and a
tentative when they come up to talk to
me and then they have you know 15
seconds of time to tell me something I’m
really listening to them and they’re
hesitant about whether or not to share
the good news about their life you know
and I think it’s often because when
people share good news about their life
people don’t necessarily respond
positively you know they don’t get
encouragement and people need so little
encouragement it’s just unbelievable and
so there comes something good and I
think how that’s so good you know
somebody says oh I’m getting along way
better with my father I haven’t seen him
for ten years and now we get along great
and then the power of that you can’t
overstate the power of that for
individuals to get their life together
the individuals an unbelievably powerful
force and every single person who gets
their act together a little bit has the
capacity to spread that around them it’s
it’s a chain reaction and so it’s a
lovely thing to see I had a really
interesting thing the other day about I
don’t know who this yogi was you might
be able to work out from there from the
anecdote no Bertrand Russell the
intellectual and early CND campaign for
nuclear disarmament pioneer was like
fools the enemies like I think we all
committed that a whole CND deal and they
were visited by a yogi who said to him
look you know what does it matter if we
get rid of nuclear weapons we are still
the consciousness that created nuclear
weapons they will find some other outlet
what we need to address is the inner
space this in
Inchon this attention the desire to
create that kind of technology as long
as we have that where we won’t we won’t
resolve the issue the nuclear weapon is
a symbol and emblem and expression of
that phenomena of that frequency so we
should address that and Bertrand Russell
said below this is a really significant
issue again your mystical bloody Vedic
approach to it let’s get rid of the
weapons I think it’s possible to agree
with both men in that instance and like
that all that you know people that
criticize me people that adore me
they’re responding really to themselves
they’re responding to their own
consciousness they’re responding to
their own reality and so I try to now I
know what my intention is I know where
my attention is and that is what defines
my life I try not to be to allow my
experience of reality to be too diluted
by off of people’s input I mean I love
the approval and I’m not so keen on the
condemnation but like also I look a lot
at the source I look a lot where it
comes from and like you know I don’t
mind FoxNews hating me I’m okay with
that
I’m okay with that you know that I can’t
change who I am for Fox News what would
I become psychologists have been not all
psychologists obviously but the
psychological profession is its neck
deep in this in this pathology has been
beating these self-esteem drum for 50
years
oh no you’re okay you should feel good
about yourself like you’re fine the way
you are it’s like you think well that’s
a calming message for people it’s like
no it’s not it’s not at all and I
watched my audience this is like it’s
full of people in the audience who think
I’m suffering a lot more than I think is
tenable a whole bunch of it’s my fault
my life is not in the order it should be
I know I’m doing 50 things wrong it’s
like what the hell is wrong with me
what’s wrong with the people around me
this is really serious and some you know
well-meaning person comes up and says oh
you’re okay just the way you are it’s
like no one wants that message it’s like
no I’m not okay the way I am I’m not
okay at all the way I am I
know that and so you know when I’m when
I’m speaking to to when I’m speaking now
I say to people well oh you’re nowhere
near what you could be that’s that
that’s the positive message it’s like
yeah you’re a mass but you don’t have to
stay that way as you’re a mass you know
it obviously you’re suffering away like
like so much you can barely tolerate it
it’s like that’s okay
you can do something about it so yeah
that’s the thing that that turns the
lights on it’s like you could do
something about it you were honored for
you think the characters like Good Will
Hunting ones
yeah Good Will Hunting was here won the
Academy Award for that is there any
place that you want to be I think there
I am right now it’s a good play that’s
exactly right yeah to me about that just
share with no share very justify brother
yeah there’s that feeling of being you
know doing like the stand-up but
combined with one hour photo insomnia
you know kind of pushing the envelope in
terms of what people perceive I can do
especially in playing a character you
know these darker you know troubled and
in many cases you know nasty vicious and
that helps to just you know push it
through because if you’re looking at now
when you want you it’s at this age to
say you’re playing characters now which
but it’s that idea of you know playing
these characters and doing this it’s
been a great combination like a really
good year to just push the envelope and
I think that’s always what I want to do
is to try different things and kind of
always change perceptions and change the
rhythm you can yeah break up it’s merely
the rhythm it’s basically saying okay
now we hit it you know that and then you
know hit a little harder and then back
off and then go berserk like you know
with the stand up which is just free
form and then come back and play
something so controlled like in one hour
photo those are all possible I mean it I
was trained at Juilliard
you know I won’t you know went for three
years and left
and then you know when did stand up but
the stand up was always just kind of a
great release and then still having that
ability to play you know both and having
that that range really helps for me it’s
great and you mentioned the other part
having great friends and family they
just make life extraordinary and a world
to still go out and see and learn about
which is the most important of all do
not cast pearls before swine and what
that means is that if people are not
listening to you stop talking to them
and that’s really that is the best piece
of advice that I can give you and what
happens is is that if you stop talking
to people who aren’t listening to you
and start watching them instead they
will tell you what they’re up to but so
if you have things to say you say them
but you find people that will listen
talk to them the ones who aren’t
listening pull back because you’re
you’re devaluing what you have to say by
offering it to an audience that does
nothing but reject it and that’s a good
guideline to life in general so pull
back a lot of people kind of mean they
say well I want to be an entrepreneur
and I go that’s great what’s your idea
and they go well I don’t have one yet
and I say well I think you should go get
a job as a busboy or something so you
find something you’re really passionate
about because it’s a lot of work and I’m
convinced that about half of what
separates the successful entrepreneurs
from the non successful ones is pure
perseverance it is so hard you pour so
much your life into this thing there are
such rough moments in time that most
people give up I don’t blame them it’s
really tough and it consumes your life I
mean if you’re if you’ve got a family
and you’re in the early days of a
company it’s I can’t imagine how one
could do
I’m sure it’s it’s been done but it’s
rough I mean because it’s a pretty much
you know a 18-hour day job seven days a
week for a while so unless you have a
lot of passion about this you’re gonna
not survive you’re gonna give it up so
you got to have an idea of an ax or a
problem or a wrong that you want to
write that you’re passionate about
otherwise you’re not going to have the
perseverance to stick it through and I
think that’s half the battle right there
it’s hard to remember how bad it was you
know in 1980s with IBM taking over the
world with the PC with Doss out there it
was it was far worse than the Apple 2
they tried to copy the Apple 2 and they
done a pretty bad job and if you needed
to know a lot and so things were kind of
slipping backwards and Macintosh was you
saw the 1984 commercial but I hope you
have that in your archives
you know Macintosh was basically this
this relatively small company you know
in Cupertino California taking on the
Goliath IBM and saying wait a minute
your way is wrong this is not the way we
want computers to go this is not the
legacy we want to leave this is not what
we want our kids to be learning this is
wrong and we are going to show you the
right way to do it and here it is it’s
called Macintosh and this is so much
better than its gonna beat you and we
are gonna do it and that’s what Apple
stood for
I find that levels of success in almost
any industry or area correlate to a
person asking great questions in some
cases they seem absurd in fact the
hallmarking way of great questions is
that sound completely ridiculous so
someone might ask like Peter Thiel why
can’t you achieve your ten-year goals in
the next six months it’s a thought
exercise that’s a that’s that’s a good
question to answer for yourself and
these types of questions come up
surprisingly often with with very very
impressive folks whether it’s in
business military entertainment or
otherwise and the way you can get better
at questions is by studying interviews
in part so I studied Larry King
I studied Charlie Rose I studied Terry
Gross I studied that go down the list
I studied twenty Robbins who does in
person one-on-one interventions at his
events in front of ten thousand five
thousand people and he’s just genius
with how he uses questions to like
pattern interrupt and grab someone’s
attention and divert them in a more
productive productive direction now why
is that relevant relevant because
thinking is the process of asking
questions you’re asking yourself
questions and then you’re answering them
in your own head so if you get better at
asking other people questions you get
better at asking yourself questions
which means you are a you’re improving
your thought performance and level of
thinking some of the making it sound
like well you’ve heard it before but
it’s you know were three emphasizing I
think the first is you need to work if
you tip anyone how well you want to do
in particular if you’re starting a
company you need to work super hard so
what is super hard mean well when my
brother and I was starting our first
company instead of getting an apartment
we just rented us a small office and we
slept on the couch and we showered at
the YMCA and we’re so hot up we had just
one computer so the compass that
like was up during the day and I was
coding at night the seven days a week
all the time and I sort of briefly had a
girlfriend in that period and in order
to deal with me she had to sleep in the
office so I work hard like it mean every
waking hour that’s that’s the the thing
I would I would say if you’re
particularly if you’re starting a
company and I mean if you do simple math
to say like okay if somebody else is
working 50 hours and you’re working a
hundred you’ll get twice as done as much
done in the course of a year as the
other company the other thing I’d say is
that if you’re creating company or if
you’re joining a company the most
important thing is to make sure it is to
attract great people so either be would
join a group that’s amazing that you’ve
really respect or if you’ve building a
company you’ve got to gather great
people I mean all the company is is a
group of people that have gathered
together to create a product or service
and so depending upon how talented and
hardworking that group is and the
greeter which they are focused
cohesively in a good direction that will
determine the success of the company
so do everything you can to to gather
great people if you’re creating company
and I’d say focus on on signal over
noise a lot of companies get confused
that they spend money on things that
don’t actually make the product better
so for example at Tesla
we’ve never spent any money on
advertising we’ve put all the money into
R&D and manufacturing and design to try
to make the car as good as possible and
I think that’s that’s the way to go so
before for any given company just keep
thinking about are these efforts that
people are expending are they resulting
in a better product or service and if
they’re not stop those efforts and then
the final thing is is to sort of don’t
just follow the trend so you may have
heard me say it that is good to think in
terms of the physics approach of first
principles which is rather than
reasoning by analogy you boil things
down to the most fundamental truths you
can imagine and you reason up from there
and this is a good way to figure out if
if something really makes sense or if
it’s just what everybody else is doing
it’s hard to think that way you can’t
think think that way about everything
takes a lot of effort but if you’re
trying to do something new it’s the best
way to think and that framework was
developed but by physicists to figure
out counterintuitive things like quantum
mechanics so it’s really a powerful
powerful message and anyway so that’s
and then I think there’s the final thing
I would encourage you to do is now is
the time to take risk you don’t have
yeah you don’t have you don’t have kids
your obligation troops at all seven
[Laughter]
probably that is the but as you get
older your obligations increase so you
and once you have a family you start
taking risk not just for yourself but
for your family as well it gets much
harder to do things that might not work
out so now is the time to do that before
you before you have those obligations so
I would encourage you to take risks now
do something bold you won’t regret it
thank you only should expect to make
money and things that I understand and
when I say understand I don’t mean
understand you know what the product
does or anything like that I mean
understand what the economics of the
business are likely to look at look like
ten years from now or 20 years from now
I know in general what the economics
will say Wrigley chewing gum will look
like ten years ago the internet is going
to change the way people chew gum it
isn’t gonna change which come they chew
now if you own the chewing gum market in
a big way and you’ve got double mint in
the spearmint and the juicy fruit those
brands will be there ten years soon
Alyssa I can’t pinpoint exactly what the
numbers are gonna look like on Wrigley
but I’m not gonna be way off if I try to
look forward on something like that that
evaluating that company is within what I
call my circle of competence I
understand what they do I understand the
economics of it I understand the
competitive aspect
of the business so figuring out the
economic consequences TV I think there’s
I don’t know 20 25 million cents a year
so in the United States I don’t think
there’s one of them made in the United
States anymore I mean it’s a TV set
manufacturer what a wonderful business I
mean everybody nobody had a TV in 1950
or thereabouts 45 to 50
everybody has multiple sets now nobody
is in the United States has made any
real money making the census they’re all
out of business
you know the Magnavox is the RCA is all
of those companies radio was the
equipment of the 20 over 500 companies
making radios in the 1920s again I don’t
think there’s a u.s. radio manufacturer
at the present time coca-cola
you know I was at 1884 Jacobs pharmacy
or whatever and fellow comes up with
something a lot of copiers over the
years but now you’ve got a company that
is selling roughly 1.1 billion eight
ounce servings of its product not all
cokes right and some others daily
throughout the world honored 17 years
later so understanding the economic
characteristics of a business is
different than predicting the fact that
an industry is going to do wonderfully
so I look at the internet businesses or
a look at tech misses I say this is a
marvelous thing and I love to play
around on the computer and it now I
ordered my books from Amazon and all
kinds of things but I don’t know who’s
gonna win unless I know it’s gonna win
I’m not interested in the best thing
I’ll just play around other computer and
defining your circle of competence is
the most important aspect of investing
it’s not how important how large your
circle is you don’t have to be an expert
on everything but knowing where the
perimeter of that circle of what you
know and what you don’t know is and stay
inside of it is all important
Tom Watson senior who started IBM said
in his book he said I’m no genius he
said but I’m smart in spots I stay
around those spots and you know that is
the key so if I understand a few things
and I stick in that arena I’ll do okay
and if I don’t understand something but
I don’t excited about it because my
neighbors are talking about the stocks
are going up and everything they start
fooling around someplace else eventually
I’ll get creamed and I should
alright last question on three pieces of
advice to entrepreneurs what are your
three pieces I’m an entrepreneur so you
can share them with okay what would you
what would you how would you advise me
well I really do so thoughts like how
can I provide advice that would be most
helpful and I’m not sure I’ve given
enough thought to to that to give you
the best possible answer but I think I
think it’s certainly being focused on
something that you’re confident will
have high value to someone else and just
being really rigorous in making that
assessment because people are attend
tend to natural human tendencies wishful
thinking so a challenge for
entrepreneurs is to say well what’s the
difference between really believing in
new ideals and sticking sticking to them
versus pursuing some unrealistic dream
that doesn’t actually have merit and
it’s it’s that is it that is a really
difficult thing to to tell you can you
tell the difference between those two
things
yeah so you need to be sort of very
rigorous in in your self self analysis I
think certainly extremely tenacious and
and then just work like hell I mean you
just have to put in you know 80 hour and
you don’t hurt our weeks every week
yes and there Madeleine that all those
things improve the odds of success okay
I mean if other people are putting in
40-hour work weeks and you’re putting in
100 hour work weeks then even if you’re
doing the same thing you know that in
one year you will achieve what that she
you you will achieve in four months what
it takes them a year to achieve there is
very little difference if any between a
very high-priced business education and
what’s available a lot for a lot less
money so I I mean I I went to the
University of nebraska-lincoln my last
year in college I went to Wharton for a
couple years before that I learned just
as much at the University of brass
because I did at Wharton at and there’s
nothing against Award nominee it’s just
me we had a very good school there I had
some terrific professors at Lincoln and
so I would not assume that if I was
paying a few thousand dollars for an
education here in the state for example
versus paying huge amounts elsewhere
that it was going to make a lot of
difference most a lot of the education
you need to be prodded in the right
direction but are awful lot of it is
self the self talk I mean Andrew
Carnegie did a wonderful thing in this
country in terms of libraries and I used
to spend a lot of time at Lowry I can
get locked in at the University of all
my ones what was then the University of
Omaha and they had I couldn’t get out
for hours and one night they got so
entranced with what I was reading but it
there’s there’s all kinds of information
available now with the internet it’s so
much you know easier than it was then so
it’s out there to be taken and
it isn’t necessary to pay thirty or
thirty-five thousand dollars a year to
go to some big-name school to get the
education at all I mean if you’re gonna
learn accounting it’s gonna which is the
probably the most important of course
you take in business you’re gonna learn
accounting accounting absolutely as well
and my view going to UN always going to
Harvard I mean I see I would bet on that
and so I wouldn’t wrap up huge bills in
terms of getting a business education
now you know if you’re going to get a
medical education I mean there are
certain professions where there may not
be any way around spending a fair amount
of money and getting in debt to some
degree we’ve got to make that decision
yourself but I’d certainly try to
minimize it and and I would sort of I
would have it figured out how I would
handle that debt and say a five-year
period after I got out of school or I
would think twice about incurring it I
we start a lien on the house still
facing bankruptcy still fighting like
crazy I was still unemployed
he still they still hadn’t figured out
like the solution yet for the business
and I was about to turn off the TV and
there on the the TV there was this
rocket launching and I thought oh my
gosh I am gonna launch myself out of bed
like a rocket ship like NASA right here
had launched me out of that bed and I’m
gonna move so fast that I don’t think
hmm I’m gonna beat my brain now here’s a
I talk a lot about your instincts and
inner wisdom and we can get into this a
little bit later but a lot of us talk
about the fact that you have a gut
feeling but what all this research that
I’ve done for the book and all the
speaking that I do what I’ve discovered
that’s fascinating is actually when you
set goals when you have an intention on
something that you want to change about
your life your brain helps you what it
does is it opens up a checklist and then
your brain goes to work trying to remind
you yeah of that intention that you set
and it’s really important to develop the
skill and I say that word purposefully
the skill of knowing how to hear that
inner wisdom and that intention kicking
in and leaning into it quickly so for me
my brain saying that’s it right there
move as fast as a rocket Mel I wanted to
change my life and I think most people
that are miserable or that are that are
really like dying to be great and dying
to have more we want to change we want
to live a better life we want to create
more for our families we want to be
happier the the desire is there again
it’s about how do you go from knowledge
to actions so the first thing in this
story that’s important is realizing that
the answer was in me and my mind was
telling me pay attention could have also
been the Bourbon anyway the next morning
the alarm goes off and I pretended NASA
was there
it’s a stupidest story I literally went
5 4 3 2 1 I counted out loud and then I
stood up and I’ll never forget standing
there in my bedroom it was dark it was
cold it was winter in Boston and for the
first time in 3 months I had beaten my
habit of hitting the snooze button I
couldn’t believe it and I thought wait a
minute
counting backwards said is the dumbest
thing I’ve ever heard in my entire life
well the next morning I used it again
and it worked the next morning I used it
again and it worked the next morning I
used it again and it worked and then I
started to notice some
really interesting there were moments
all day long all day long just like that
five-second moment in bed where I knew
knowledge what I should do and if I
didn’t move within five seconds my brain
would step in and talk me out of it
every human being has a five-second
window might even be shorter for you you
have about a five-second window in which
you can move from idea to action before
your brain kicks into full gear and
sabotages any change in behavior because
remember your brain is wired to stop you
from doing things that are uncomfortable
or uncertain or scary it’s your job to
learn how to move from those ideas that
could change everything into acting on
one of the things that’s really
interesting about the old testament is
that and the Jews in the Old Testament
is that they don’t take the path of cain
every time their walloped by God which
is like fairly frequently they say we
must have done something wrong and we
have to set our self right and that’s an
unbelievably heroic attitude because
that’s the alternative to cursing fate
it’s like you take the responsibility
for failure unto yourself and you think
well if I was just maybe if I just had
my act together a little bit more if I
took advantage of every opportunity that
was put in front of me if I wasn’t
resentful and bitter then I could have
done something that would have tilted
the situation in a different direction
and like that’s almost inevitably true
Dostoevsky I think said something like
every man is responsible for everything
that happens to him and everything that
happens to everyone else and that’s you
know that that’s that’s it’s a crazy
statement right it’s a crazy statement
and he was a pretty extreme person in
many many ways but there’s a level at
which that’s metaphysically true you
know because what happens is that it’s
you its failure to act often that’s the
most catastrophic
no I mean it’s it’s it’s to not do the
right thing when the when the situation
presents itself and it’s very specific
you know you’re constantly in situations
where you could do the right thing if
you were willing to take a risk that’s
actually a relatively moderate size and
you know that you could take the risk
and you know that you should take the
risk and you don’t and that happens to
people all the time and then what
happens is the thing that they didn’t
oppose grows a little bit and they
shrink a little bit and that starts a
loop on those Ed Sullivan shows I began
to realize not just there everywhere all
these shows I didn’t fit and here’s what
I was missing I was missing who I was I
began with a dream of being Danny Kaye
which is a very mainstream dream it’s
very mental America it’s a people
pleaser job and I dreamed a path that
was traditional commedia a disc jockey
comedian actor big success a mainstream
dream meanwhile what I really was was an
outlaw and a rebel because I had lived
in a guy that kind of life I got kicked
out of three different schools I got
kicked out of the Air Force I got kicked
out of the choir I got kicked out of the
altar boys I kicked out a cuz summer
camp I got kicked out of the Boy Scouts
and I quit school at ninth grade I great
marks I was a smart kid but I didn’t
care they didn’t want teaching what I
want I didn’t give you it’s important in
life if you don’t give it it can help
you a lot so I didn’t give it and I was
this kind of I was a pot smoker when I
was 13 we broke the law we broke into
cars we broke into offices we broke into
Columbia University we broke into stores
we did all sorts of unlawful things and
I was that kind of person I was one who
swam against the tide of what is
expected and what is but the
establishment wants from us but I didn’t
know that about myself because this
dream blinded me this dream was about a
mare
about the path then we all follow the
middle of the road middle-class America
mainstream will dream and being Wayne
while I’m sitting there like this you
know those people that look at this
stupid no I don’t want to be in the
Bunny number can I get out of the bunny
number please I don’t want to put on the
uniform you know and and and I didn’t
know this dissonance was inside me and
in the period this is happening all
through the 60s the counterculture was
forming the Free Speech Movement started
in Berkeley the hippies were growing
into a force and peace love power blue
flower power
pot smoke and anti authorities he’d been
aiming anti-authority throw over the
establishment burned down the math
building Wow ding ding ding ding ding
ding ding
so I gravitated toward that because I
was that person really and and the
people I hung around with were that way
the can the musicians I knew in the late
50s had gone through that transition
suddenly they looked different and their
music change and I’m listening to people
like the Buffalo Springfield I listen to
Bob Dylan let’s say these people in
there I realize these artists are using
their talent to project their feelings
and ideas not just please people and I
suddenly was able to see my place and to
realize I was in the wrong place you see
in 1967 the Summer of Love the peak of
the hippie movement I was 30 I was
entertaining people in nightclubs who
were 40 and they were at war with their
kids who were 20 there was a generation
war I was in the middle of it I was 30
to 20 40 and I’m doing over here these
are the people that will at least
understand me and give me a chance
so it took two years I didn’t go to the
mountain and come back different I
didn’t do it Bobby down I didn’t do it
whatever you dose people who just go
away and they’re back new suddenly I
took two years to change and it happened
on television so it was if I had I
denied that part of myself and finally
it came into full flower and I never
a really big success until that I
probably had 200 television appearances
by that time and I still wasn’t realized
as a writer comedian as a comedian by
that I mean I hadn’t let myself grow
into that and and I found out later I a
lot of you feel stuck because you’re
waiting for some kind of external force
to either push you and pressure you to
change and to be great and to be amazing
or you’re waiting for somebody to give
you permission you’re either sitting
back because you need some sort of
external motivation from somebody that’s
gonna push you or praise you or pressure
you in order to change or some life
circumstance like maybe in your past
you’ve experienced trauma or you face
something really scary and that was the
thing that made you change and then the
second thing that people wait around for
is permission
look those may or may not come in your
life if you are somebody that is sitting
around waiting for some external force
to come and do the work for you that is
such a losing bet it’s unbelievable
maybe you’ll get lucky maybe somebody
will come but more than likely no one is
coming
the only kind of force that will truly
create change in your life is you the
internal kind of force I hate to say it
but for those of you that feel really
really stuck and you keep thinking that
somebody’s got to pick me or somebody’s
gonna discover me or somebody’s got to
give me permission to write this book
Knight it’s it’s ridiculous
this is external versus internal force
and what you have to figure out if
you’re stuck is are you the kind of
person that is guilty of needing wanting
and waiting for external forces people
an event some outside force to kick you
in the ass they will finally do the
stuff that you’ve been dreaming about
doing I want to tell you something no
one’s coming no one the people in life
that get what they want are the ones
that aren’t waiting for an external
force to validate their dreams to
inspire them to give them permission
it’s the people that realize that
success but happiness that control it
comes from the internal force and what
is the internal force it’s you it’s you
it’s you being able to realize that no
one’s gonna do the work for you it’s you
realizing that you’re never gonna feel
ready in fact even as you start working
toward the things that you really want
to do you’re definitely not going to
feel ready and you’re gonna feel outside
your comfort zone and that’s normal when
you start to feel like you’re stretching
yourself and you’re sticking your
scrawny neck out there and you’re taking
some risks that’s so amazing cuz you’re
growing you know we have been invented
by turning events the difference where
we were the first group of people that
took that crusade to the American
consumer out there you know and yes
that’s why we’re number one I believe
the first step to winning in business is
you’ve got to do what’s right for the
consumer out there I believe your
reputations everything if you don’t do
what’s right 100 percent of the time you
might get by for one day one week one
month one year but certainly they’re
gonna smell you out we’ll play the back
term and invest the difference is right
and we’ve stood the heat like you
couldn’t believe and that’s why we’re
number one I’m the kind of person that
believes you should always make
decisions with your heart with soul you
can use your brain for math you can use
your brain to look at the fine print in
a contract but when it comes to the
actual feel of the decision you always
want to go inward and check it against
your heart and soul how do you do that
here’s the simple test does the decision
that you’re about to make expand you
expand your future or expand the
possibilities of your life if the answer
is yes then the decision is yes no
matter how terrifying it is if you
conversely look at the choice that you
have to make and the decision will
shrink you will silence you will inhibit
you in some way then the answer is no no
matter how easy the decision is no
matter how safe the decision is the
answer is no now one of the things I
want to point out that when you start to
use this does it expand or does it
shrink me
does it open possibilities or does it
keep things closed does it raise my
voice or does it silence me right is
that there’s always a short-term and a
long-term impact to the decision the
short-term impact to making an expansive
decision a decision that’s based in your
heart in your soul
sometimes it’s terrifying because
sometimes it means moving or it means
changing a job or changing a
relationship or having a difficult
conversation or starting something new
and those sorts of things are always
uncomfortable so brace for impact
put the force fields up but make the
decision anyway because the long-term
impact of making a decision from your
heart and soul that is where the best
life comes from because you’re living
for what’s true for you not what’s safe
in the moment I go into the emergency
room and I was like Donald Smith and
they’re like I’m sorry he passed and
they took me into the room there’s my
father laying on a gurney just dead
it still has a tube sticking out of him
and they’re trying to intubate him or
something like that but just motionless
quiet
no breathing whatsoever and it was weird
news I mean to say the least you always
know eventually parents gonna go but I
wasn’t ready I wasn’t ready for that
moment and then I walked out and I went
outside and had a cigarette I still
cigarette smoker in those days and I was
just thinking about being half an orphan
or halfway to being an orphan or
something like that my brother comes out
and I was like I can’t believe it right
he goes yeah that’s pretty tough
and I said how was it because my brother
was there he was staying with my my
parents and Donald without missing a
beat my brother goes dad died screaming
and I was like what and he goes dad died
screaming
that’s what do you mean he’s like well
he woke up and he was kicking the sheets
off and screaming about being on fire
and he was so hot and so hot and get him
water and screaming the screaming got
louder and louder and it reached a fever
pitch and he died and I don’t know how
else to say it but dad died screaming
and that hit me like a Mack truck and I
remember thinking oh my god in this
world or even a good man like my old man
is gonna die screaming there’s no point
and not trying to achieve every dream
that I have this is my eventual end one
day that’s it and and I really felt like
man that’s like this I can’t this is my
future we’re all probably gonna go out
screaming so the best thing to do prior
to that is to try to pack that life with
as much wonderfulness fun productivity
surround yourself with people that are
gonna help you do that you know cuz in
this world there’s not a lot of support
a lot of negativity there’s a lot of
cynicism even as I sit here and tell
that story about my father dying I
guarantee there’s a cynical head in this
house maybe more sitting there going who
cares move on tell a joke the world is
full of why man you tell people
something they’ll tell you why throw a
rock and you’ll hit somebody with why
like hey man I want to make a movie why
why do you think you could do that why
why nobody else is doing it why are you
doing it there’s so much why you go out
and you find why not you surround
yourself with why not people are just
like why not we’re like hey man I’m
gonna try something like why not let’s
give it a shot people who try to help
you do your dreams make your dreams come
true and you do the same for them we’re
all in this together and it costs
nothing to encourage an artist that’s
why I get up here for almost 20 years
now after the movie man I mean a lot of
filmmakers get up after the movie and
spend more time than the movie itself
talking but I’ve been trying to impart
one simple lesson for nearly 20 years
anybody can do this you know what I’m
saying like I wasn’t born into a
business or the film business or born
with a mic in my hands
I have no discernible talent whatsoever
man I have no connections to the
business we’re from New Jersey and stuff
I got lucky somebody picked up the movie
and boom I was off and running and part
of that manifest when you’re in brought
into the indie film community part of
your your your job part of your honor
part of your privilege is to make sure
that keeps going to encourage other
people you know to tell people it’s
worth the shot just like Wayne Gretzky
said like you miss a hundred percent of
the shots you never take it’s always
worth the shot now if you’re talking
about leg if what your shot is usually
like I’ve always wanted to kill 12
children Kevin don’t take that shot at
all I’m not talking about that you know
I’m talking about
artsy you know writing a blog and making
some music making a movie making a
cupcake store the Knitting store putting
together of a YouTube clip just anything
that’s just not or we must do this
because it’s a part of my job or this
will get money some you just do just to
see if it could be done live a why not
life man because we’re all gonna die
screaming so make sure when you die
screaming you’re totally fulfilled you
like I took all the shots I did it I did
I went after everything I wanted to or
at least tried
take the shot the shot is always worth
taking whether it’s a dopey thing like
podcasting or writing a book or writing
a blog think about the encouragement you
get when you encouraging artists think
about the potential that comes out of it
you tell it dude good job man that
person maybe one day writes that blog
that you mean out to the entire world
because it says exactly what you always
wanted to say but couldn’t yourself or
they write that the song that you play
over and over after a loved one dies
because it means the world to you they
they make that movie that is the one you
cling to and everything is going wrong
in life all you pop that in and things
aren’t bad for two hours all that comes
from encouraging an artist nothing good
comes from discouraging an artist so for
20 years I keep coming up here and going
go out and do it why the aren’t you
doing this it’s so fun you should do it
take your shot I took my shot and it’s
nothing but and donuts you know
just
so I’m here to tell you man give it a
shot go out and try this is something
that we see over and over and over again
and it’s this idea that you don’t ever
start you stay trapped in your head and
if you feel paralyzed if you’ve been
spinning the same ideas over and over
and over again then you know what I’m
talking about you see many of you are
thinking way to Vic you’re attaching way
too much pressure on the things that
you’re interested in until you start
blogging about fashion you won’t even
know if you like it so thinking that you
have a dream about doing it and thinking
that you have this grand plan that
you’re gonna do it full-time it is a
complete and utter waste of your time to
be dreaming that big and let me tell you
why because oftentimes if you’re the
kind of person like Vicky that’s getting
trapped up here the bigness of what
you’re thinking about is what’s stopping
you what I want you to do if you’re in
Vicki’s situation is I want you to stop
dreaming and I want you to just start
doing small things I want you to go back
to curiosity and less into crushing your
big goals you think about life and
business and success is that you have to
be willing to start and for people that
procrastinate starting is the hardest
part for people that worry for people
that think too big starting is the
hardest part folks that study
procrastination talk about the fact that
the only way to beat procrastination is
to create what they call a starting
ritual which is a way to push yourself
to get started because all the research
shows that if we can push you to get
started on something you’ll likely keep
going
I called up Bill Hewlett when I was 12
years old and he lived in Palo Alto his
number was still in the phone book and
he answered the phone himself did not
yes hi I’m Steve Jobs I’m 12 years old
I’m a student in high school and I want
to build a frequency counter and I was
wondering if you had any spare parts I
could have and he laughed and he gave me
the spare parts to build his frequency
counter and he gave me a job that summer
Aniela packard working on the assembly
line putting nuts and bolts together on
frequency counters he got me a job in
the place that built him and I was in
heaven and I’ve never found anyone who
said no or hung up the phone when I
called
I just asked and when people asked me I
try to be as responsive him to pay that
that debt of gratitude back most people
never pick up the phone and call most
people never ask and that’s what
separates sometimes the people that do
things from the people that just dream
about them got it
you got to act and you’ve got to be
willing to fail you got to be willing to
crash and burn you know with people on
the phone with starting a company with
whatever if you’re afraid of failing you
won’t get very far [Music]