life people don’t necessarily respond
positively you know they don’t get
encouragement and people need so little
encouragement it’s just unbelievable if
you stop talking to people who aren’t
listening to you and start watching them
instead they will tell you what they’re
up to
if you’re failing repeatedly it’s
possible that there’s something wrong
with the way that you’re conceptualizing
the world need motivation watch the top
ten of belief nation what’s up at seven
my one word is believe and I believe in
you I believe you have an amazing gift
inside you that I want to see exploded
onto the world so let’s get your
motivation to attend and get you
believing in you grab a snack and chew
in today’s lessons from a man who went
from being introduced to the writings of
George Orwell at an early age to
becoming a Harvard professor writing
hundreds of scientific papers and
inspiring millions with his YouTube
channel he’s Jordan B Peterson and
here’s my take on his top ten roses
alright let’s kick things off with rule
number one my personal favorite
encourage others I’m really sad to see
that people are disenchanted and
nihilistic and depressed and anxious and
aimless and perverse and vengeful and
and all of those things it’s terrible
and then to see people question whether
that’s necessary and then to start to
rise out of it it’s like it’s so fun
like last night I was at after my talk
it’s overwhelming
I don’t usually think about these things
but I was I was after my talk last night
and so all these people line up and you
know they have their 15 15 seconds with
me and they’re kind of tentative they’re
excited and a tentative when they come
up to talk to me and then they have you
know 15 seconds of time to tell me
something I’m really listening to them
and they’re hesitant about whether or
not to share the good news about their
life you know and I think it’s often
because when people share good news
about their life people don’t
necessarily respond positively you know
they don’t get encouragement and people
need so little encouragement it’s just
unbelievable and so there comes
something good and then they call that’s
so good you know when somebody says oh
I’m getting a long way better with my
father I haven’t seen him for 10 years
and now we get along not great and then
the power of that you can’t overstate
the power of that for individuals to get
their life together the individuals an
unbelievably powerful force and every
single person who gets their act
together a little bit has the capacity
to spread that around them it’s it’s a
chain reaction and so it’s a lovely
thing to see rule number 2 take
responsibility one of the things that’s
really interesting about the Old
Testament is that and the Jews in the
Old Testament is that they don’t take
the path of Cain every time they’re
walloped by God which is like fairly
frequently they say we must have done
something wrong and we have to set our
self right and that’s a an unbelievably
heroic attitude because that’s the
alternative to cursing fate it’s like
you take the responsibility for failure
on to your
self and you think well if I was just
maybe if I just had my act together a
little bit more if I took advantage of
every opportunity that was put in front
of me if I wasn’t resentful and bitter
then I could have done something that
would have tilted the situation in a
different direction and like that’s
almost inevitably true
Dostoevsky I think said something like
every man is responsible for everything
that happens to him and everything that
happens to everyone else and that’s you
know that that’s that’s it’s a crazy
statement right it’s a crazy statement
and he was a pretty extreme person in
many many ways but there’s a level at
which that’s metaphysically true you
know because what happens is that it’s
you its failure to act often that’s the
most catastrophic you know I mean I’ve
it’s it’s it’s to not do the right thing
when the when the situation presents
itself and it’s very specific you know
you’re constantly in situations where
you could do the right thing if you were
willing to take a risk that’s actually
of relatively moderate size and you know
that you could take the risk and you
know that you should take the risk and
you don’t and that happens to people all
the time and then what happens is the
thing that they didn’t oppose grows a
little bit and they shrink a little bit
and that starts a loop a rule number
three know when to pull back I noticed
that there’s always a group of my
friends who always criticize what I’m
saying and not even try to understand
what I’m wearing I’m coming from and
I’ve always wondered how to deal with
that I mean I want to listen to what
they’re saying but they are not
understanding what I’m they’re not
trying to listen to what I’m saying so
what would you do in that situation
answer that very briefly okay there’s a
line in the New Testament that’s
relevant to that do not cast pearls
before swine and what that means is that
if people are not listening to you stop
talking to them and that’s really that
is the best piece of advice that I can
give you and what happens is is that if
you stop talking to people who aren’t
listening
– and start watching them instead they
will tell you what they’re up to but so
if you have things to say say them but
you find people that will listen talk to
them the ones who aren’t listening pull
back because you’re you’re devaluing
what you have to say by offering it to
an audience that does nothing but reject
it and that’s a good guideline to life
in general so pull back rule number four
change yourself psychologists have been
not all psychologists obviously but the
psychological profession is its neck
deep in this in this pathology has been
beating the self-esteem drum for 50
years oh no you’re okay you should feel
good about yourself like you’re fine the
way you are it’s like you think well
that’s a calming message for people it’s
like no it’s not it’s not at all and I
watch my audience this is like it’s full
of people in the audience who think I’m
suffering a lot more than I think is
tenable a whole bunch of it’s my fault
my life is not in the order it should be
I know I’m doing 50 things wrong it’s
like what the hell’s wrong with me
what’s wrong with the people around me
this is really serious and some you know
well-meaning person comes up and says oh
you’re okay just the way you are it’s
like no one wants that message it’s like
no I’m not okay the way I am I’m not
okay at all the way I am I know that and
so you know when I’m when I’m speaking
to – when I’m speaking now I say to
people well oh you’re nowhere near what
you could be that’s that that’s the
positive message it’s like yeah you’re a
mess but you don’t have to stay that way
as you’re a mess you know it obviously
you’re suffering away like like so much
you can barely tolerate it it’s like
that’s okay you can do something about
it so yeah that’s the thing that that
turns the lights on it’s like you had do
something about it
rule number five find your purpose if
you’re hungry and you eat well that’s
good
but it’s over and then you’re on to the
next thing right it’s not exactly
sustaining it’s just necessary that’s
called consume Ettore reward by the way
this other reward system is incentive
reward and the incentive reward system
works on dopamine this neurochemical
dopamine which is also the neuro
chemical tracks that opiates and cocaine
and amphetamines the drugs that people
really like to abuse alcohol often for
some people activate and so you might
say if you don’t have enough meaning in
your life then you’re more prone to
and that’s definitely the case even with
rats if you take a route you put him in
a cage by himself and he has nothing to
do and then you give him access to
cocaine he’ll get addicted to the point
where he won’t do anything but take
cocaine but if you throw the rat back in
with a bunch of other rats and he gets
to do rap things then it’s very hard to
get him addicted to cocaine and so the
purposeless rat is prone to addiction
well it’s the same with human beings now
here’s a corollary to that which is
really cool so the magnitude of the
reward you experience as you’re moving
towards a goal is proportionate to the
importance of the goal so that means the
more important the goal you pick the
more possibility there is for the kind
of reward let’s say it’s really a state
of being that is life-affirming and it
is directly life-affirming in that you
know like if you’re in a football game
and you’re and it’s an important
football game and maybe you break a
finger and you know normally that’s
that’s a problem it hurts and you’re
gonna stop doing whatever you’re doing
but if you’re right in the middle of the
game then you’ll be so amped up on this
reward system that its analgesic it
stops the pain it also suppresses
anxiety so if you have a purpose then
its analgesic it takes some of the pain
out of life it’s very positive in that
it motivates and energizes you and
focuses you and makes you able to
remember and pay attention and it quells
fear and so those things are all direct
and so then you might think well what’s
the best possible goal well and that’s
that’s the purpose I would say of
religious training and philosophical
training it’s like just what the hell
are you doing in the world rule number
six tell the truth or at least don’t lie
tell the truth or at least don’t lie
yeah well it’s not that easy to tell the
truth because who knows about the truth
but you can learn not to say things that
you know to be false and if you stop
saying things that you know to be false
then your life will improve a lot it
simplifies it and it puts you in the
linemen with reality and you should be
in alignment with reality because
there’s a lot more of it than there is
of you rule number seven treat yourself
like you matter
first of all you have to treat yourself
like you matter because if you don’t
then you don’t take care of yourself and
you become vengeful and and and cruel
and you you take you take it out on
people around you and you’re not a
positive force none of that’s good
so you suffer more and so does everyone
around you and there’s a malevolence
that enters into it none of that’s good
so that’s what happens if you don’t
treat yourself like you matter and then
what happens if you don’t treat other
people like they matter
well you lie to them you cheat them you
steal you you you enter into impulsive
relationships with them they can’t trust
you that doesn’t go anywhere they don’t
like you you you end up alone at best
and maybe like incarcerated at worst
like that doesn’t work and so you watch
the people around you who thrive
regardless of what they say they act out
the proposition that everyone matters
and then you have a functional society
and I think okay well if if if when you
act out the proposition that everyone
matters you have a functional society
maybe that’s evidence that that
proposition is true it’s like I think
it’s I think it’s true rule number eight
don’t be arrogant if you’re failing
repeatedly then there’s probably
something wrong it’s possible that
there’s something wrong with the way
that you’re conceptualizing the world
because you have a choice right if if
you keep making sacrifices and they
don’t work there’s a binary choice and
one is well there’s something wrong with
the structure of reality and the other
is there’s something wrong with your
approach and so then you might say well
let’s take the first idea there’s
something wrong with the structure of
reality it’s like you’re really gonna
say that are you you’re really going to
come out and say I know enough to judge
the nature of being and and then the
alternative is also quite frightening
because then you know you it’s you
that’s making the mistakes and you might
be wrong at a really deep level and that
might mean that a lot of you has to burn
off and be transformed maybe even things
about yourself that you think are
admirable and that you like because your
position you know your your self
conceptualization is so warped and wrong
and that’s really daunting but you know
when people set themselves up as the
judge of being I mean I’ve written about
this a fair bit in my
book which is called 12 rules for life
when people set themselves up as the
judge of being then they take on what
can only be described as a kind of
satanic arrogance because they’ve
actually taken to themselves the moral
right to criticize the structure of
existence itself it’s like you better be
careful when you do something like that
because you’re setting yourself up as
the judge of being rule number nine
listen to others there’s a another rule
in my book which is rule 9 assume that
the person that you’re listening to
knows something you don’t
well they do the person you’re listening
to knows some things you don’t you can
be sure of that now whether or not you
can get to them is a different matter
but if you do get to them it’s a real
deal for you that’s why you want to
listen to the other person’s arguments
is because you’re not everything you
could be you don’t know the pathway
forward with as much clarity as you
could and it’s possible this is one of
the wonderful things that I’ve had the
privilege of experiencing as a clinician
know because people it’s like I live
inside a Dostoyevsky novel as a
clinician people come in and they tell
me about their lives and I listen to
them and they tell me things that are
just absolutely beyond belief you know
and I learn from my clients constantly
they’re they’re telling me honestly
about their experience they tell me
things they wouldn’t tell anyone else
because I actually listen to them but
part of the reason I listen is because
I’m desperate to listen it’s like
there’s a possibility I’m gonna do
something stupid in the next five years
that’s gonna be like fatal and there’s
some small possibility that if we have a
decent discussion that you’ll tell me
something that will eliminate some of my
blindness so that I don’t have to fall
into that particular pit and if you have
a good sensitivity for the depth of the
pit then you know you’re pretty bloody
motivated to avoid it and so and that
and that and that dialog is it’s it’s
dialogic it’s dial logos right it’s
shared logos it’s the way that we redeem
ourselves mutually moving forward and
rule number 10 the last one before a
very special bonus clip is be precise in
your speech I like this one and I think
I mean this is very clearly what you do
be precise in your speech so in in
Genesis one of the things God has Adam
do first so God makes the world by
speaking
so that’s the first thing to think about
you’re supposed to think like in a
sophisticated way about this that the
idea is that there’s some integral
relationship between communication and
the structure of being it’s part of the
role that consciousness plays in the
world whatever that role is language
takes the chaos and makes it into things
and so God has Adam named all the
animals they’re not even really real
until they have names now those are more
implicit that’s another you know here’s
a here’s an example let’s say that
you’re having a rough patch in your
relationship and you don’t know why it’s
unnameable is it real well yeah it’s
manifesting itself in it like a
physiological discomfort then you talk
about it you name it it’s like it goes
from this blurry thing that’s kind of
potentially goes snap and then it’s this
thing right and then that’s a horrible
thing it’s like a little poisonous thing
but it’s not a whole foggy cloud of
potential poison it’s like this little
sharp poison thing and then you think
okay it’s real it’s a little monster but
it’s not it’s little at least and now
probably we can do something about it
if we can admit to it so it’s this
precision that specifies and like so
this is a little bit of the Voldemort
effect right
if you since you’re a Harry Potter guy
they wouldn’t name right this problem we
got to name them first oh yeah you got
to name them first absolutely because
the unnameable is far more terrifying
than the nameable you see that in there
was a great Blair Witch Project
terrifying move oh yeah it’s unnamed
there’s nothing terrible happens in that
movie it’s all the unnameable it’s like
what’s goin on what’s goin on what’s
goin on and no matter how terrible the
actuality is it’s rarely as terrible as
your imagination because your
imagination like it’s an old thing it’s
seen a lot of terrible things in the
history of life like it can put monsters
everywhere and so it’s almost always
better it might be better without
exception to name the thing no matter
how terrible it is and if you can’t name
it what that means is that you’re you’re
telling yourself that
you’re so terrified that you can’t bring
your attention to bear on it and that
makes you your the loser
instantly if it’s so terrifying that you
now I’ve got a very special Jordan
Peterson clip-on standing up straight
but before that I want to know from you
what did you learn from this video and
more importantly what immediate action
are you going to take don’t just watch
under video and don’t do anything about
it you’ve spent time watching this make
a commitment to changing something in
your life or your business put it in the
comments below when you write it down
it’s much more likely to happen so leave
it in the comments thank you guys so
much for watching I believe in you I
hope you continue to believe in yourself
and whatever your one word is much love
I’ll see you soon and enjoy the bonus
stand up straight with your shoulders
back my wife is a massage therapist and
she’s very physiologically aware so
she’s also helped me with this sort of
thing but we watch people on the streets
all the time
people in general now have very poor
posture yeah
very bad for them well that’s that’s got
to be phone related – right well yeah I
think that’s part of it but I also think
it’s something our culture doesn’t
attend to like you kind of have to
remind your kids to stand up you know it
takes a certain amount of conscious
effort but yeah in that chapter I talked
a lot about lobsters which I’m kind of I
kind of have an affinity for lobsters
and because they well the short story is
that when a lobster loses a fight
because they’re fighting all the time
for dominance let’s say in their
hierarchies he kind of crunches down so
he looks smaller when he wins a fight he
stretches out looks bigger and so he’s
signaling to other lobsters the tally of
his victories and then say so if a
lobster has won a fight he’s more likely
to win the next fight then you would
calculate from having a tally of all his
previous defeats and victories and if he
loses a fight that he’s more likely to
lose the next fight so that’s that that
Mathieu principle at work okay so you
think well so what so what does that
have to do with anything it’s like okay
part of the kicker is well that lobster
runs on serotonin neurochemical and if
the lobster loses the serotonin levels
go down and if he wins the serotonin
levels go up and when the serotonin
levels go up he stretches out and he’s a
confident lobster and one of the
consequences of that is if a lobster
loses a battle and you give him the
equivalent of antidepressants then he
stretches out and he’ll go fight again
so antidepressants work on lobsters huh
right and you think well who cares it’s
like no no you don’t get it we diverged
from lobsters from an evolutionary
perspective 350 million years ago and
it’s the same circuit it’s absolutely
unbelievable and that shows you how deep
inside you how basic how primordial that
circuit is in you that sizing other
people up and looking at where they fit
in the hierarchy well with human society
it’s more like hierarchies of competence
then
it’s per se but and like if your
serotonin levels fall you get depressed
you crunch forward and and the whole
everything around you turns cloudy and
black and and then you’re inviting more
oppression right and so you get into
this bad loop you know and so it’s
really important to if you’re trying to
get your act together it’s really
important to stretch yourself out and
and sit up properly because it’s it’s
part of the psychophysiological loop
that can start you on the upward curve
and so it’s a really important thing to
take note of raise your standard Apple
at the core its core value is that that
people passion and not one drop of most
self-worth depends on your it’s supposed
to mean
I don’t ever give up I’d have to be dead
or living for fast day hey believe
nation if you want to see my all-time
favorite top ten rows of success I have
a very special secret video for you
these are the individual clips that I
have personally learned the most from
and applied to my life and my business
check the link the description for details