today’s whole program is based on the
power of focus we if you recall in our
last session we’re talking about how to
really direct our states of mind and
emotion we said that everything that we
really want in our lives no matter what
it is whether it be family or friends or
relationship or money or business
success or acknowledging all those
things the only reason we want them is
what we think we’ll get out of them
which is a state change a certain level
of feeling within ourselves we also
found out in our last tape that all
emotions every feeling we have is the
result of how we use our body that
emotions literally are nothing but
physiological storms in our brains if
you will and that we learned that by
using our bodies in certain ways by
using our voice our gestures our
breathing our facial expressions we
could radically change our States and we
also talked about the idea if you’re a
call of measuring our states where are
we on a scale from zero to ten ten being
absolutely empowered unstoppable
passionate zero being dead and noticing
are we at the appropriate level for what
we want to accomplish and that for most
cases not all in life but most would it
be nice to live at level 8 9 or 10 or
above on a consistent basis how much
more juice would you have and so you
develop some exercises and discovering
how to move your body not like me not
like somebody else but like you do when
you really are feeling absolutely
excellent today what we want to do is
take on the second way we can manage our
states and the second way to change your
state at any moment in time as quickly
as you can think it is to control and
direct the focus of your mind what do I
mean by that well think about this the
only experience that you have of life
comes in two forms what you’re
physically feeling because of the
condition and use of your body at that
moment in other words if you’ve got
physical pain that’s obviously gonna
affect your state there’s some kind of
tension for example or if you haven’t
had any sleep that’s certainly gonna
affect your state as well or if you’ve
eaten something that’s blown your blood
sugar sky-high then obviously that’s
gonna affect your emotional states as
well the only other thing that really
controls your state is what are you
paying attention to right now at this
moment I mean let’s take an example
have you ever had a headache maybe even
a massive headache that you thought
there’s no way you would ever go away
you’re really deep pain now what do you
do well most people go get an aspirin
what if instead have you ever had it
happen where somebody asked you a
question or something needed to be done
or something acquired your total focus
somewhere else outside of yourself and a
lamo immediately the pain disappeared in
fact you forgot about it and later on
when you thought about it you noticed
your headache was gone
haven’t you had that happen at least
once or twice in your life now how did
you do that see my whole life has been
studying what makes people successful if
someone’s able to do something if
they’re able to get rapport with
somebody else if they’re able to create
the results they want physically in
their life that is lose weight feel
energized if they’re able to create the
relationships that they really desire if
they’re able to feel as good as they
ever wanted to feel I want to know how
do they do that and so I began to study
how could somebody get rid of a deck
that quickly so we wouldn’t be dependent
on some drug like aspirin or Tylenol or
anything else and I began to realize
that what it was is we changed our
mental focus and that whatever
experiencing in our body really comes
from what we’re paying attention to
that’s what really determines how you
feel and of course how you feel
determines usually how you’re gonna
behave doesn’t that make sense and when
you feeling really lousy you don’t
usually do really well and I know
they’re exceptions but those exceptions
are because you control your focus you
don’t focus on feeling lousy you focus
on what’s got to be done there was
tremendous power and controlling the
focus of your mind now what do I mean by
this specifically well there are two
things we can control in terms of focus
we can control what we’re focusing on
that is what we’re picturing in our mind
what we’re saying to ourselves what
we’re paying attention to in our
physical body or we can control how
we’re focusing how we’re focusing means
let’s say the dimension of the pictures
in our mind the brightness of the colors
in our head the volume of our sounds if
we change how we’re paying attention to
things not just what it radically
changes our state as well let me give an
example pretend for a moment that your
brain is a camera and you go to a party
how are you gonna feel at that party
well the only thing you’re gonna have
feelings about other things you focus on
I mean in that room literally there are
almost unlimited number of activities
and proble
the emotions and conversations and
things that are going on but your
experience of that party is based on
what that camera focuses on now if it
focuses on two people that are fighting
and that’s what it focuses on for the
entire party you would leave that party
saying oh that party was really intense
I mean people are really upset with each
other if your focus was on two people in
love or maybe guessing passionately and
say wow that party was really moving I
mean those people are really connected
if your focus was on some people that
were really boring or bored it’s out
nobody really enjoyed that party here’s
the problem the problem is your camera
that is the focus that you have does not
usually take in everything
simultaneously your conscious mind can’t
there are only so many things you can
consciously focus on I mean think about
how many things right now you are not
paying attention to that are happening
at this moment there’s the blood
pulsating through your right ear you may
not even pay attention to it I mention
it now you might focus on it there’s the
beat of your heart
were you even noticing that until I
mentioned it there’s the feel of maybe
some air coming from an air conditioning
maybe if you’re nearby or there’s the
heat on your skin or there’s the
blinking of your eyes there are
unlimited number of things that are
happening right now but see here’s the
thing about human beings since we can’t
focus on everything and consciously
perceive it all what most of us do is we
become what I call deletion creatures
what do I mean I mean that most of the
time most of us delete that as we fail
to pay attention to or we ignore most of
what’s going on around us at any moment
in time so what’s the price of all this
deletion well the price is we walk
around believing or hallucinating might
be a better word that our experience of
the world is real now would you think
that if you were looking through a
camera that was focused on one little
portion of the party that that was truly
the party that wouldn’t be very
intelligent with it in fact you know
what else is a problem that camera may
even create close-ups where it makes
things bigger than they actually are
where they look bigger and brighter or
worse than they were is that possible –
do you think your brain does that as
well you better believe it does so the
key is if you want your life to be a
party that you’re happy with and not a
party that you’re upset with
you got to realize that any moment in
time there’s enough going on in the
party of your life that you could find
something to be upset about all you’ve
got to do is focus on it
all you gotta do is look around that
party find out areas that don’t match
your expectations make them big and
bright and close and you’ll be upset and
you know what most people are good at
this they’ve done it over and over and
over again the other thing that’s
equally true is that virtually any party
at any moment in time there’s somebody
having a good time and if you were to
focus on some area of your life at that
moment of time you can make yourself
feel absolutely great or you could take
some little thing something that’s just
kind of nice but make it bigger and
brighter and immediately you can feel
better about it as well
so here’s my point my point is if you
want to look at the quality of life and
know what it is it’s the quality of the
states that you live in day to day I
mean isn’t it really true isn’t it how
you feel day to day that determines how
you treat yourself how you treat other
people and how great you feel or how
poor you feel about your life what
determines it one how you use your body
so you want to develop some new habits
and to what and how you focus on things
now that’s the only way we can explain
how people have come from unbelievably
painful experiences and turn them around
w Mitchell secret is he has controlled
his physical body specifically the way
he uses his face this man has learned
with what’s left of his body to smile
and move his face in ways that makes him
feel incredible and the second thing is
he focuses continuously on what he wants
what he’s got what he’s grateful for and
as a result he feels incredible now
nobody would blame him for looking
around and seeing he has no legs and he
has no fingers he’s got the toes there
instead and he’s in a situation where
he’s in physical pain a lot of the time
nobody would blame him for feeling sorry
for himself but see he doesn’t focus on
that he loves life because he focuses on
the part of the party that’s the best
part for him don’t you deserve to give
yourself the same gift now take a look
at John Belushi example we used earlier
also how could a guy like Belushi or
Presley or take somebody like Elizabeth
Taylor here’s a lady that would have
everything going forward by most
people’s standards she’s an incredibly
intelligent woman she’s absolutely
beautiful
she’s a great actress she has thousands
and thousands probably millions of fans
to be more accurate who absolutely love
her she has as much money as most people
could ever imagine needing or wanting
she has a lifestyle that’s absolutely
phenomenal she has family and friends
that care about her and do anything for
her and yet what happens with this lady
she has not learned to manage her stay
and she pays the price as great as she
is great on the stage but in her
personal life over and over again she
has to turn to food or to drugs to try
and take care of the challenges within
herself see how could someone have it
all and still be unhappy because no
matter how good it is
you can always focus on something that
isn’t perfect or doesn’t match your
expectations and that is called ultimate
failure in life you want to know what I
believe success is success is creating
consistent pleasure in your life and
causing yourself to grow failure is
being able to find pain no matter how
good it is
that’s failure the bottom line is you
have that power and you can change it
right now by understanding that you make
decisions about what to focus on now it
may be true that you’ve got some bad
habits it may be true that right now you
look at what’s worse or you look at
what’s wrong or you see what’s not
working your life and it’s habitual so
you don’t think about it consciously but
you still make the decisions you can
turn off the automatic pilot and take
control and when you do you can
instantly change the quality of your
life the lady I married my wife Becky
one things I love about her more than
anything in the world the reason I
married her probably more than anything
else is this woman is so incredible at
her ability at any moment in time to
focus on what is great in a situation
what is beautiful the most little things
she and I share that power where we can
be in the middle of anything the middle
of turmoil and upsets and frustrations
and in a heartbeat we can stop and we
say hey look
notice that flower notice that sunset or
look in each other’s eyes and say how
did I get so lucky to get you
we have that ability and we share we
reinforce it in each other and it gives
power to our relationship and to our
lives
you have that control all you have to do
is exercise it so what I want to do is
be more specific with you now and how to
do it now first of all let me
demonstrate this
is really true to you I mean you may say
well yeah this makes sense well let’s
take a quick example now this may be an
unfair situation if you’re in a place
that you’re familiar with but let’s try
this right now and if you’re in a place
you’re familiar with you might want to
try it later on in the day when you’re
not familiar with something but let’s
take an example here what I want you to
do right now is that like you if you
would let’s test the power of something
I want you to look around your room the
room you’re in right now or if you’re in
your car you can look out the windows
also but I want you to notice everything
you can see everything you can see and
I’m gonna give you a few seconds that is
brown quick look around the room
everything you can see that’s brown look
around your car look outside everything
can see it Brown quickly everything make
sure you don’t miss anything everything
sees Brown quick quick quick
okay stop close your eyes with your eyes
closed now close your eyes if you’re
driving this is difficult okay so you
might want to try this later as an
exercise but I would like you to do is
close your on it and what I want you to
do with your eyes closed now is tell me
or you know since I’m not there
literally although I may be you never
know but just for now outloud say
everything that’s in this room that is
green oh maybe I hooked you a little bit
huh and we’re waiting for Brown tell me
out loud come on everything that’s green
try this everything in that room that’s
blue everything in the room that is
white and everything in the room that’s
red and now open your eyes and look
around the room and notice everything
you can see in this room that’s green
come on take a good look now something
you may say well there’s nothing this
room is green look behind you there
there’s something green behind you
that’s right what’s blue in this room
now do you see a lot more green do you
see a lot more blue now than you did the
first time unless you’re in a room you
already are super familiar with that is
you’ve already got a picture in your
head and you know it like maybe it’s
your bedroom you know everything even
then you may not have noticed everything
but if you’re in a strange room or your
place you’re not used to what I find is
99% of time people see a lot more blue
and green when I asked them about that
specifically later on in other words
when I asked you to focus on brown bats
what comes up you notice mostly brown
you tend to delete a lot of the other
details isn’t that true now
that relate to life see a lot of people
in life stare at and focus on the brown
in life the shall we say feces of life
and other people they look for the green
they look for its growing they look for
what’s alive that’s what you need to do
see in life we get whatever we focus on
whatever you pay attention to that’s
what you experience in your body
instantly so how do we control our focus
well that’s a good question for years
I’ve been looking at it you know I read
all the books on positive thinking where
they said hey you want to do good you’ve
got to feel good that makes sense and if
you want to feel good do cut the duck
yourself good and picture good well the
challenge with that the challenge with
positive thinking is what we’ve already
talked about problem with positive
thinking is you got to think about it
and it’s a little bit difficult we got
to get ourselves conditioned to think
more positive plus I kept asking the
question how do you think positive I’d
say be positive how well I said you know
make good pictures well how do you get
yourself to do that and so what I’ve
analyzed for years is what determines
since there are zillions of things you
and I could pay attention to at any
moment what determines what we focus on
well some of what we focus on or most of
it is based upon our beliefs of what’s
important and our values and we’re gonna
talk about that in the next tape but for
right now the thing that at this
specific moment determines what you
focus on is how you’re evaluating things
now that sounds like a big chunk but
what do I mean by that well the way we
evaluate things determines how we feel
but what is an evaluation evaluations
are nothing but questions the way I
found this out is one day I was
realizing well you know W Mitchell’s
pretty happy because he’s evaluated his
life in a way that makes him happy John
Belushi’s not here because of the way he
evaluated things he made himself
actually feel bad when he had plenty
could have felt good on if he just
focused on that part of his life’s party
if you will so I thought how do I
explain what an evaluation is and then I
noticed that I had asked a question to
try to evaluate how to explain
evaluations and I thought well is it
possible that evaluations or questions I
thought well that’s a question too isn’t
it
that’s a question isn’t it is that
really what evaluation is is a question
notice that was a question pretty soon
and I’ve whipped myself into a frenzy
and began to realize evaluation
are in fact questions and I tried to
mismatch it that as I tried to look at
the opposite side and I tested in all
kinds of people maybe you can find the
opposite of what I’m saying but I don’t
know I have found that thinking is
nothing but the process of evaluating
things you’re always evaluating what
does this mean to me and what should I
do
those are two questions your brain is
asking on a continuous basis see if I
take my fist and I go wham and I bring
it within two inches of your face I
guarantee you your brain is gonna make
some evaluations question number one
what does this mean question number two
what should I do and your brains gonna
value it it’s gonna search your brain
for your beliefs about what does this
mean do I need to move is it gonna hit
me what does this mean and what should I
do do I hit back do I adjust what what
does my body need to do we’re always
asking those two primary questions but
the questions we ask determine what we
focus on here let me be more specific
and I’ll think you’ll have an example of
what I mean I’ve said to you so far in
this tape that what you focus on
determines how you feel I’ve also said
that the questions you ask yourself
determine what you focus on think of
questions this way imagine your brain is
the ultimate computer and in that
computer is the answer to any question
you could possibly have and by the way I
believe that that metaphor is really how
your brain works
it can come up with the answer to any
question you ask it the Bible says ask
and you shall receive a very true and
real statement beyond what you might
believe religiously even if you have
different religious beliefs it is
reality in my experience of how our
brain works now
if you have this great computer and in
front of you the only way you get
information out this computer is to ask
for it you tap in to this keyboard and
you ask questions and bam and answer the
questions you will get responses on the
screen your brain works the same way you
ask questions you hit the keyboard with
questions and it will fire off the
answers in your brain but here’s what’s
different about your brain than most
computers whatever question you ask if
you ask it with the absolute expectation
that you’re gonna get an answer and if
you ask it consistently and you give it
a brain time to search for the answers
you will get an answer by the way any
question you ask you’ll get an answer to
even one that doesn’t have a basis in
reality in other words this computer
will do anything it’ll search its files
and make things out in order to answer
your question what do I mean
well if you go around ask your brain why
do these things always happen to me
well guess what your brain will search
all its databases and say why do things
always happen to me and it’ll take every
possible form of input of what people
said to you in your life what you’ve
ever said to yourself which you’ve ever
read or saw on TV and I’ll make up an
answer for you it always happens to you
because you’re a turkey that’s why right
and I’m sure enough now you feel lousy
you see gosh I’m a turkey you feel bad
and everything’s not working out
see whatever you ask me to get an answer
to if you say how come I’m so lucky you
know how did I get so lucky your brain
will search all kinds of things and show
you that you’re lucky in other words our
questions determine how we feel enough
you’ve got certain emotions certain
feelings that you have on a daily basis
that you don’t like habitual emotions
I’m here to tell you that the feelings
you feel or come from what you focus on
so what you have is habitual focuses and
those focuses come from habitual
questions in other words if you feel
certain ways on an ongoing basis it’s
because you’re asking certain questions
on an ongoing basis might be useful for
you discover what those are I’ll give
you some samples questions that people
ask themselves on a regular basis that
make them feel lousy
question number one is why does this
always happen to me I want you to notice
in that question is something we call a
presupposition a presupposition means
you’re presupposing in the question the
things already happen to you that may
not be true but as long as you ask
questions that way your brain will make
up an answer for you and I’ll give you a
good example after the 1988 Republican
National Convention when George Bush
selected Dan Quayle as his running mate
CNN ran a public opinion poll where you
called a 900 number and vote yes or no
to the answer to a question but here is
the question it blew my mind
question was does it bother you that Dan
Quayle used his family’s influence to
stay out of Vietnam and again in the
National Guard
now I’m paraphrasing just slightly but
that’s what they said now tell me what’s
wrong with this picture and challenges
they presuppose that he actually did it
they said does it bother you so your
brain stops evaluating whether he
actually did it or not
and focuses on whether it bothers you or
not does this happen every day with you
do you ask questions that presuppose
that you’ve got a limited level of
intelligence or skill or ability and
therefore get lousy answers in your
brain listen if you ask yourself
questions like why am I so fat that
question guarantees you’re gonna stay
fat you know why cuz you go why am I so
fat your brain will go okay let me
figure out some reasons lamo here’s why
you’re fat
cuz you eat continuously and you have no
control your brain goes oh god I already
control and you feel useless and you
feel like you’re disempowered what would
be a better question to ask yourself
then why am I so fat how about this one
how can I become more thin right now or
what could I do today to start myself on
the road to becoming more thin and what
do I need to do consistently to create
the long-term results of health that I
want if you ask a better-quality
question you will get a better quality
answer or I’ll give you step beyond that
if you ask a question like how can I
become more thin now you’ll get an
answer but what if you ask a question
like how can become more thin now and
enjoy the process ah magical when you
ask that question what happens now is
you literally come up with only an
answer of how to lose weight but also
how to enjoy it and since your brain
likes pleasure there’s a much better
chance you’re gonna follow through am I
making any sense to you I’m here to tell
you that the quality of your life comes
down to the quality of the questions you
ask yourself on a daily basis so if
you’re asking questions like well how
come I can’t ever learn anything just
listen to that question or why can’t I
ever learn anything that’s even worse
why questions tend to be what I call
endless loop questions like why does
this happen to me see your brain
probably can never come up with a
definitive answer it’ll come up with all
kinds of reasons but you’ll keep going
into a loop now I discovered the power
of questions in my own life because at
one time my life I was really really
angry and I knew would have changed my
physiology and my movement to make
myself feel better but I didn’t want to
you ever been in that state like
somebody said to me well Tony just
change your physiology I said I don’t
want to all right I was upset but the
reason I was
that is what I was focusing on I was
focusing on somebody who had taken a
bunch of money from my company and
embezzled it and I got pretty upset to
say the least and I was walking around
in a frenzy going how could he do this
how could he have the audacity to do
this I may have even had a next foot of
her – who knows but the point is that by
asking those questions I was whipping
myself into frenzy how could he possibly
do this why would he do this situation
to me well guess what you’re never gonna
get an answer to that all it does is
whip you into more and more of a frenzy
can you hear it so finally I said okay
doing this is leading to more and more
pain isn’t making my life any better I
better ask myself a more empowering
question so I thought what’s something
that’s important to me
my answer is I love to learn I already
shared that with you so I said okay what
can I learn from this well guess what my
brain likes learning so it was willing
to focus on that question and you know
what out of that question of what can I
learn from this over the next three
months
I literally developed a whole new level
of understanding about what makes human
beings do what they do I develop
literally a whole new technology which I
call destiny technologies and I now do a
whole seminar called your date with
destiny and when we help people
literally design their life so they are
literally pulled forward in the
direction they want their life to be
rather than having all this
self-sabotage and challenges that come
up for people the most incredible
program I do it all came out of me
taking a horrible situation and asking a
better question what kind of learn from
this what can I get out of this that
would enhance my life and other people’s
as well how can I use this situation to
create much more power in my ability to
help people and help myself
asking these questions allowed me to
search my brains data banks and create
tremendous power out of that situation
after I was in that situation I had
other times when I get upset unbearably
when I get upset it’s because I was
asking a why question why did this
person do this I don’t understand or how
could they possibly have done it because
I would never do that how could they do
that I’ll never get the answer based on
that so I learned to ask the question
what can I learn from this now for you
that might not be the right question
maybe learning is not important enough
for you a brain to go while I’m willing
to focus on that now instead of the
problem but my brain I pick learning or
I pick something like well if I’m angry
at somebody I might
say well what do I respect about this
person now I remember one particular guy
said what do I respect about him
it was this guy who’d stolen a bunch of
my stuff and I thought well at least
he’s using my stuff you know I do
respect him he’s at least using it he is
I’m just sitting back there right
sitting on his haunches here in stop
he’s at least using it I respect that
what else do I respect about him well
well he’s at least going for it and you
know even though I don’t think he’s
doing for the right reason he’s probably
helping a few people who knows you know
and I began to literally feel better
that again ask myself this question
what’s actually funny about this that I
hadn’t noticed
great question ask yourself what’s
actually funny about this I hadn’t
noticed now again when you ask a
question you got to be willing to really
search for the answer if you go well
it’s great about this that I had noticed
or what you notice what’s humorous about
this I didn’t notice and guess what
there’s no way your brains not gonna go
for it but if you ask with a sincere
interest and desire for an answer you
will get one if you keep asking and so
all sudden I start noticing things about
their humors I start laughing hey listen
we’ve all heard the phrase someday we’ll
look back and laugh on this situation
well if that’s really true why wait why
not look back and laugh on it now why
wait for years before you can feel good
about something again and the way to do
it is change your focus the way to
change your focus is use questions
they’re much more powerful than any
other tool I’ve noticed I’ll tell you
why questions basically do three things
when you ask a question number one when
you ask somebody a question it instantly
changes what they focus on and therefore
it changes the way you feel instantly
see if you’re feeling lousy and I come
along and I get you to answer a question
like well let me ask you a question what
is great in your life right now you oh
well nothing I go on I know nothing is
but if there was something that was
great you know what what could be great
in your life if I get you to really
think about it what it makes your brain
do is search your files and you know
what no matter how bad your life may
seem there’s something great going on
there’s no doubt about it you know
here you are and all your friends is
weaking or skiing but you’re home
studying for a big test do you feel
cheated you feel left out you feel hurt
hey listen all you need is a little
contrast for yourself what’s great right
now this weekend you’re studying things
that can make a huge difference in the
quality of your life forever
these people are gonna work their
muscles and come back and probably
forget about that situation right or
you’re not in a Nazi concentration camp
there’s a little contrast for you you
get to be learning because you choose to
not because you’re forced to you’re
studying something that you chose to
study you’re actually creating a future
for yourself you’re getting to use your
brain there’s so many things you could
focus on you’re in a free country
you’re alive you’ve got friends yet
people that care about you there are
millions of things you can feel good
about all you have to do is change your
focus and if you don’t you end up like
the John Belushi’s of the world think
about it see the choice is yours so if I
ask you a question like what could be
great in your life or what’s great right
now if you really think about it you can
come up with something think about it
right now
what’s really great in your life right
now what’s something that you feel
really great about think about it or
what could you feel great about if you
wanted to as you think about things that
make you feel great
notice how it makes you feel when you
think about that what about that why
does that make you feel great how does
that make you feel inside when you feel
those feelings and you know what you can
change your state instantly just by
focusing on that at any moment in time
so the first thing questions do is they
change our focus and therefore our state
immediately the second thing that
questions do is they change what we’re
deleting now remember in order to feel
unhappy you have to focus on the things
that would make you unhappy and you have
to delete all the great things that are
happening in your life
isn’t that true in other words every one
of us right now could get depressed
piece of cake
all we have to do is focus on all the
tragedy that’s happening the world right
now even little pieces of it children
they’re dying right now starvation we
can make pictures and I head out those
bloated stomachs hearing the cries of
babies just as they pass off into death
seem flies eating their flesh how’s that
for graphic at the same time every one
of us could be an absolute total
pleasure interrupts that pattern of a
picture you’re looking at and think of
something like create total pleasure and
you know what there is alien things but
to do that you have to stop
saying you have to delete all the
negativity in the world and focus on
things that make it feel great so you
could focus on a relationship you have
you could focus on how much you’ve
already learned in the last six or seven
or eight days you could focus on the
people that loved you you could focus on
your ability as a human being to change
your life at any moment in time you
could focus on what learning means to
you you could focus on the Sun you could
focus on breathing fresh air you could
focus on the fact you live in a free
country you could focus on the fact that
you have a connection with your Creator
you could focus on anything and feel
incredible you could focus on new babies
being born this moment they had a
greater opportunity in life than any
time in our history there’s so much we
could focus on it feel good about the
challenge is this you must control it
through questions questions change what
we delete we’re always deleting human
beings we’re not gonna stop deleting
things as long as we’re gonna delete
things why not delete things that
disempower you and focus on the things
that empower you does that make sense
the third thing that questions do is
they help you to get access to resources
within yourself I’m a big believer that
anything you’ve ever wanted to
accomplish you’ve already got the
resources inside of you to make it
happen that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t
go out and learn from somebody else or
model the success of others I’m just
saying the things you need to succeed
are already in your core the resources
are there you just need to get access to
them by asking better questions I’ll
give an example if I ask myself
questions like gosh can I really do this
that creates a feeling of doubt to hear
that does that and that feeling of doubt
will keep me in a state where I’m not
gonna get the most out of myself but if
instead I ask myself question like how
can I make this thing happen right now
more powerfully than I ever dreamed of
and have fun doing it if I keep asking
that question my brain will get access
to more of my ability because whatever I
asked for my brain will give me but if
you ask your brain can I really do this
and you do it with a tone of voice of
doubt you are gonna get access to the
resources called doubt does that make
sense if you think about it the greatest
communicators the greatest teachers of
all time were not people that so much
taught us as they did ask us they shared
things with us but they got us to use
our own resources they asked questions
all the great
speakers of dumbness hey Martin Luther
King asked questions about a dream John
F Kennedy asked don’t ask what your
country can do for you ask what you can
do for your country he wanted you to
take the resources out of yourself and
contribute and expand our country you
must learn to ask habitual questions
that empower you I want you to know that
I believe the success in my life has all
come down to one basic skill state
management on a consistent basis I’ve
learned how to manage my state and
therefore I’ve been able to get myself
to breakthrough and take action with
very few people around me were able to
do the same they were able to that’s
probably not the best description they
weren’t using their power because they
didn’t have access to all of it and I’ve
done that by every day doing things that
would increase my physical ability
flexibility power energy by the way I’m
moving the way I breathe and also by
consistently and daily conditioning
myself to ask the kinds of questions to
create the kinds of focus that moves me
towards larger levels of contribution
and joy and fun and success and passion
instead of the things that would pull me
down that would pull me to areas of
frustration and anger and giving up
listen there is no capability difference
between you and someone you consider to
be an ultimate role model of success the
only difference is they’ve learned to
use their mind and body with more power
on a consistent basis they’ve learned a
manager state they’ve learned to use
their body effectively whether they know
it or not consciously doesn’t matter
a lot of people do things without being
aware of how they do it and they’ve
learned to control their mental focus
remember whatever we concentrate our
focus on consistently and strive to
learn from and make new distinctions
about we will get great at I don’t care
what it is if you focus on it daily and
you strive to do better you’re gonna
make little distinctions that’ll make
you more and more effective every single
day so you better decide what you want
to focus on in your life and what you
want to experience on a daily basis cuz
that’s where your power is gonna come
from that’s where your power is gonna
emit from that’s the genesis of your
power I want you to know that many
things that you think are impossible or
difficult are only difficult or
impossible because of the way you’re
focusing on things you’re focusing on
how it can’t be done and you can
remember whatever you focus on is what
you
yet so if you focus on how it can’t be
done you are absolutely right and no
one’s gonna prove you wrong
so why not focus on what’s possible and
create that I mean that’s how I created
things like the firewalk seminar all I
did was hold a new level of possibility
instead of focusing on how it couldn’t
be done or how it was a terrible thing
or something like that I focused on hey
this is an incredible example of
possibility and if other people can do
it my focus and my question is if they
can do it then how can we do it how can
I share it with other people how could
it be used as an empowering experience
it’s a lot of fun I did the same thing
with teach people wood breaking you know
I teach people out of break wood karate
style not in two years but in about 20
minutes again not to make them this
powerful person but to show them that by
simply changing their mental focus by
controlling their physical emotional
state and by modeling someone’s success
that they can get results in 30 minutes
that takes most people two years and
they have what we call a breakthrough
literally I want you to know that you
have every right at any moment of time
to feel lousy to feel bad to feel sorry
to feel hurt I am NOT saying by this
tape program that you should never be
disappointed or frustrated or angry or
anything else because all of those
emotions have their place in their
proper proportion hey some of my
greatest frustrations or angers or
upsets or would have driven some of my
greatest successes because it’s made me
search for more but see what’s
interesting is the pain drove me but
what changed me from other people who
just gave up is I ask better questions
I found a way say what can I learn from
this how can I grow from this how can I
expand from this what can I take from
this experience that’ll empower me what
can I learn from this so I never have to
experience it again and by asking
empowering questions how can I take
advantage of this what’s the actual
benefit in this situation that I
probably hadn’t noticed I began to find
benefits whereas other people said why
did this happen to me why does this
always happen to me why did you do this
to me Lord how come I’m not smart enough
to pull this off why do I keep self
sabotaging see that’s the difference
between success and failures so I want
you to know I’m not saying you can’t
feel bad I’m just saying and when you’re
done feeling bad here’s how to change
and you may not want to spend quite so
much time feeling bad in the future
because feeling bad is based on focus if
you change your focus you can feel good
instantly
right now at this moment now so let me
ask you a few questions and what I’d
like you to do for your homework is
designed some questions every morning my
life I wake up and I ask myself
questions now
the truth is you already do this too the
only problem is you’re not doing it
consciously think about it when you’re
shaving are you thinking and talking to
yourself know that the process of
thinking is nothing but asking and
answering questions you’re doing it
constantly that’s where your thoughts
come from think about it now you might
say well no that’s not true or yes it is
true if you said no it’s true or yes it
is it’s cuz you ask yourself the
question is that true or something like
it
see some of the questions you ask are
subconscious your brain is deciding all
the time if I get in this car if I turn
here what’s gonna happen is that car
coming too close or too far you’re
asking questions constantly
subconsciously but you’re also doing it
consciously when you’re shaving or
putting on your makeup or shampooing
you’re asking questions but it might be
questions like God why do I always have
to do this why do I have to go to work
today think about the kind of states
that those questions create and what
would be some more empowering questions
like what can I do today that will make
today more fun than ever before what can
I do today that would create a
breakthrough in my business what could I
do today to connect more with my family
members
I wonder what’s gonna happen today
that’ll make me feel total pleasure for
no reason I wonder what I’ll see today
that I haven’t seen before see those
kinds of questions will empower you
if you’re bored it’s cuz you ask lousy
questions probably ask questions like
why do I have to do this why do we do
this all the time why do we always do
these things versus looking around
saying God what could I notice today
that I haven’t noticed before
see what can I see today they haven’t
seen before what could I smell today I
haven’t smelled before
see it’s called directing your computer
so here’s some questions you might want
to answer right now in your own mind and
notice how they make you feel question 1
what are you really most happy about
your life right now what’s one of the
things you’re most happy about in your
life right now answer that question in
your own head what are you most happy
about in your life right now or if your
brain goes nothing what could you be
happy about if you wanted to be if you
ever asked a question yourself and
somebody says well I don’t feel that way
or I don’t think that way so I know you
don’t but if you did or if you could
what could you feel happy about right
now think about it have you
or something well good let me ask a
third question how does that make you
feel really allow yourself to feel don’t
just go well makes me floppy feel the
feelings what else are you really happy
about in your life right now think of a
second thing what else are you really
happy about in your life right now what
about that makes you feel happy how does
that make you feel here’s the second
question for you what are you really
excited about in your life right now
what are you really excited about in
your life right now answer the question
in your mind think about it or what
could you be excited about if you wanted
to be excited about something think
about it oh come on you got more things
to be excited about think what about
that makes you excited why does that
make you excited how does it make you
feel what else you excited about your
life right now come on what else what
else are you really excited about in
your life right now or could you be
excited about if you wanted to how does
that make you feel here’s a third
question for you what are you really
grateful for in your life right now what
are you really grateful for in your life
right now what are some of the things
you’re grateful for what could you be
grateful for if you wanted to be answer
the question honestly how does that make
you feel I want you to notice do you
feel state changes you answer these
questions from where you were a few
moments before that’s it so you can
change your state instantly and you can
make yourself feel great there’s so much
to feel grateful for if you want my
formula for wealth it’s real simple live
everyday in an attitude of gratitude see
the more you feel like you have the more
you’ll experience in your life and the
more you’ll be willing to give see make
sure that you’re always trying to give
more than you take back and feel
grateful for everything you have and you
will be wealthy beyond your wildest
dreams but you got to control your focus
let me ask you another one what are you
really proud of in your life right now
what are you really proud about in your
life right now or what could you be
proud about in your life so far what are
some of the things what about those
things makes you feel proud how does
that make you feel what else are you
how does that make you feel and here’s a
final question for you who do you really
love most in your life and who loves you
think about it and don’t just go oh my
mom I did get some feeling step into
those experiences and feel what it feels
like think about who loves you and how
that makes you feel who do you love and
how does that make you feel to love that
person so much I had a question for you
what if every morning you started out
asking yourself a series of questions
that put you in this kind of state
there’s some real power to see the state
you’re in affects the way you look at
your whole world doesn’t it affects the
way you breathe the way you feel the way
you treat other people and your level of
success see a lot of people teaching
life do bunch affirmations go I’m happy
I’m FBI mmmmmm I’m happy and then your
brain goes B s alright now if you do
affirmations long enough they may work
because your brain may get bored and say
well why am i happy at which time it’ll
search your brain for an answer and then
also and you’ll feel happy that’s what
happens when you do affirmations or if
you go ahead and happy I’m happy I’m
happy I’m happy I’m happy and you really
create the physiology of happiness you
know what I mean by that by using your
voice that way then what you’ve done is
the affirmation didn’t do it so much
that’s putting your body in that state
so affirmations are great but what are
those questions are even more powerful
because now you have a reason to be
happy you’re not just jumping yourself
up and running around with what I call a
perma-grin where people go why are you
happy and go I don’t know but it feels
good it’s better to have all these
reasons so every morning you stack more
reasons to be happy you come up with
more reasons that you’re proud more
reasons to be grateful more reasons to
feel excited about life more
feelings of love if you stack those
every day you literally anchor them in
your nervous system this is part of what
I call destiny technology’s controlling
your state through asking yourself
effective questions this is the power of
focus and here’s your exercise pull out
your success journal and right now I
want you to write down five questions
after you’ve designed these five
questions what I’d like you to ask
yourself to do is this first of all let
me ask you this if every single morning
you got up and asked yourself five
custom design questions that put you in
peak States and they gave you lots of
reasons to feel phenomenal so you
weren’t just some guy out there again
just babbling about how excited you are
without any reasons for it I’m not
talking about being somebody who just
all pumped up for no reason but if every
day you came up with lots of reasons and
felt these powerful emotions what would
that do to the quality of your life what
would that do to your days would it be
worth developing some new habits if your
answer to these questions is yes then
I’d like to challenge you to do
something I’d like you to develop a new
habit a one that will literally
conditioned your nervous system to
associate powerful emotions with waking
up in the morning wouldn’t that be nice
here’s what I want you to do if you’re
willing to take on the challenge for the
rest of this program approximately what
twenty two more days each morning I want
you to answer those five questions and
every time you answer them you’ve got to
create some feelings so if one of your
questions was what am I most excited
about my life you got to come up with at
least two different answers and you got
to think about why you’re excited how
great that makes you feel you got to
actually feel the answer the question
two answers to each of your five
questions each morning again this is not
added work you’re already asking
questions you just may be asking
questions like oh gosh why do I have to
get up at this hour
that may not be the best question to ask
when the alarm goes off maybe you want
to install a new one that empowers you
would you be willing to do that for the
rest of this 30-day program now I don’t
want you to do this for the rest of your
life because you might get addicted of
feeling excellent for the rest of your
life and gosh only knows what would
happen to you then
so don’t go any longer than these 30
days for sure but at least for the
thirty days would you be willing to try
it
okay then go for it so you know your
assignment design five questions that
will get resources out of you make
you feel phenomenal each day that’ll
make you get access to your real powered
ability every single day also I want to
say to you please use your success
journal to write down each day a little
bit about what’s happening to you
what are you noticing have you already
begun to notice that your attitude has
changed obviously but also if you notice
that maybe you’re willing to take some
chances do you’re being more decisive
you’re taking some actions you’ve been
may be more powerful in some of your
communication
have you decided maybe to take some
actions like lose weight or stop smoking
and you’re like day three or four of
that or are you just feeling better
about the possibilities of your future
now that one’s each day you might want
to just keep a journal jot down a couple
of key ideas about what you learn that
day or what you’re experiencing in your
daily life besides this program I’ve
kept journals for years because I
believe that if my life is worth living
it’s worth recording and for me what
journals are as a way to go back and
notice my growth because otherwise what
happens for a lot of us is we get caught
up but if you have a journal you can
look and see how you’ve grown in your
development and your ability and where
you are in your life in addition your
journals are things that you can give
later on to your children someday they
can look back and learn from the lessons
you’ve learned in your life so they’re
invaluable I hope you’ll decide to keep
a success journal on an ongoing basis
after this program but see if you get
yourself in the habit right now for the next 30 days
power of focus we if you recall in our
last session we’re talking about how to
really direct our states of mind and
emotion we said that everything that we
really want in our lives no matter what
it is whether it be family or friends or
relationship or money or business
success or acknowledging all those
things the only reason we want them is
what we think we’ll get out of them
which is a state change a certain level
of feeling within ourselves we also
found out in our last tape that all
emotions every feeling we have is the
result of how we use our body that
emotions literally are nothing but
physiological storms in our brains if
you will and that we learned that by
using our bodies in certain ways by
using our voice our gestures our
breathing our facial expressions we
could radically change our States and we
also talked about the idea if you’re a
call of measuring our states where are
we on a scale from zero to ten ten being
absolutely empowered unstoppable
passionate zero being dead and noticing
are we at the appropriate level for what
we want to accomplish and that for most
cases not all in life but most would it
be nice to live at level 8 9 or 10 or
above on a consistent basis how much
more juice would you have and so you
develop some exercises and discovering
how to move your body not like me not
like somebody else but like you do when
you really are feeling absolutely
excellent today what we want to do is
take on the second way we can manage our
states and the second way to change your
state at any moment in time as quickly
as you can think it is to control and
direct the focus of your mind what do I
mean by that well think about this the
only experience that you have of life
comes in two forms what you’re
physically feeling because of the
condition and use of your body at that
moment in other words if you’ve got
physical pain that’s obviously gonna
affect your state there’s some kind of
tension for example or if you haven’t
had any sleep that’s certainly gonna
affect your state as well or if you’ve
eaten something that’s blown your blood
sugar sky-high then obviously that’s
gonna affect your emotional states as
well the only other thing that really
controls your state is what are you
paying attention to right now at this
moment I mean let’s take an example
have you ever had a headache maybe even
a massive headache that you thought
there’s no way you would ever go away
you’re really deep pain now what do you
do well most people go get an aspirin
what if instead have you ever had it
happen where somebody asked you a
question or something needed to be done
or something acquired your total focus
somewhere else outside of yourself and a
lamo immediately the pain disappeared in
fact you forgot about it and later on
when you thought about it you noticed
your headache was gone
haven’t you had that happen at least
once or twice in your life now how did
you do that see my whole life has been
studying what makes people successful if
someone’s able to do something if
they’re able to get rapport with
somebody else if they’re able to create
the results they want physically in
their life that is lose weight feel
energized if they’re able to create the
relationships that they really desire if
they’re able to feel as good as they
ever wanted to feel I want to know how
do they do that and so I began to study
how could somebody get rid of a deck
that quickly so we wouldn’t be dependent
on some drug like aspirin or Tylenol or
anything else and I began to realize
that what it was is we changed our
mental focus and that whatever
experiencing in our body really comes
from what we’re paying attention to
that’s what really determines how you
feel and of course how you feel
determines usually how you’re gonna
behave doesn’t that make sense and when
you feeling really lousy you don’t
usually do really well and I know
they’re exceptions but those exceptions
are because you control your focus you
don’t focus on feeling lousy you focus
on what’s got to be done there was
tremendous power and controlling the
focus of your mind now what do I mean by
this specifically well there are two
things we can control in terms of focus
we can control what we’re focusing on
that is what we’re picturing in our mind
what we’re saying to ourselves what
we’re paying attention to in our
physical body or we can control how
we’re focusing how we’re focusing means
let’s say the dimension of the pictures
in our mind the brightness of the colors
in our head the volume of our sounds if
we change how we’re paying attention to
things not just what it radically
changes our state as well let me give an
example pretend for a moment that your
brain is a camera and you go to a party
how are you gonna feel at that party
well the only thing you’re gonna have
feelings about other things you focus on
I mean in that room literally there are
almost unlimited number of activities
and proble
the emotions and conversations and
things that are going on but your
experience of that party is based on
what that camera focuses on now if it
focuses on two people that are fighting
and that’s what it focuses on for the
entire party you would leave that party
saying oh that party was really intense
I mean people are really upset with each
other if your focus was on two people in
love or maybe guessing passionately and
say wow that party was really moving I
mean those people are really connected
if your focus was on some people that
were really boring or bored it’s out
nobody really enjoyed that party here’s
the problem the problem is your camera
that is the focus that you have does not
usually take in everything
simultaneously your conscious mind can’t
there are only so many things you can
consciously focus on I mean think about
how many things right now you are not
paying attention to that are happening
at this moment there’s the blood
pulsating through your right ear you may
not even pay attention to it I mention
it now you might focus on it there’s the
beat of your heart
were you even noticing that until I
mentioned it there’s the feel of maybe
some air coming from an air conditioning
maybe if you’re nearby or there’s the
heat on your skin or there’s the
blinking of your eyes there are
unlimited number of things that are
happening right now but see here’s the
thing about human beings since we can’t
focus on everything and consciously
perceive it all what most of us do is we
become what I call deletion creatures
what do I mean I mean that most of the
time most of us delete that as we fail
to pay attention to or we ignore most of
what’s going on around us at any moment
in time so what’s the price of all this
deletion well the price is we walk
around believing or hallucinating might
be a better word that our experience of
the world is real now would you think
that if you were looking through a
camera that was focused on one little
portion of the party that that was truly
the party that wouldn’t be very
intelligent with it in fact you know
what else is a problem that camera may
even create close-ups where it makes
things bigger than they actually are
where they look bigger and brighter or
worse than they were is that possible –
do you think your brain does that as
well you better believe it does so the
key is if you want your life to be a
party that you’re happy with and not a
party that you’re upset with
you got to realize that any moment in
time there’s enough going on in the
party of your life that you could find
something to be upset about all you’ve
got to do is focus on it
all you gotta do is look around that
party find out areas that don’t match
your expectations make them big and
bright and close and you’ll be upset and
you know what most people are good at
this they’ve done it over and over and
over again the other thing that’s
equally true is that virtually any party
at any moment in time there’s somebody
having a good time and if you were to
focus on some area of your life at that
moment of time you can make yourself
feel absolutely great or you could take
some little thing something that’s just
kind of nice but make it bigger and
brighter and immediately you can feel
better about it as well
so here’s my point my point is if you
want to look at the quality of life and
know what it is it’s the quality of the
states that you live in day to day I
mean isn’t it really true isn’t it how
you feel day to day that determines how
you treat yourself how you treat other
people and how great you feel or how
poor you feel about your life what
determines it one how you use your body
so you want to develop some new habits
and to what and how you focus on things
now that’s the only way we can explain
how people have come from unbelievably
painful experiences and turn them around
w Mitchell secret is he has controlled
his physical body specifically the way
he uses his face this man has learned
with what’s left of his body to smile
and move his face in ways that makes him
feel incredible and the second thing is
he focuses continuously on what he wants
what he’s got what he’s grateful for and
as a result he feels incredible now
nobody would blame him for looking
around and seeing he has no legs and he
has no fingers he’s got the toes there
instead and he’s in a situation where
he’s in physical pain a lot of the time
nobody would blame him for feeling sorry
for himself but see he doesn’t focus on
that he loves life because he focuses on
the part of the party that’s the best
part for him don’t you deserve to give
yourself the same gift now take a look
at John Belushi example we used earlier
also how could a guy like Belushi or
Presley or take somebody like Elizabeth
Taylor here’s a lady that would have
everything going forward by most
people’s standards she’s an incredibly
intelligent woman she’s absolutely
beautiful
she’s a great actress she has thousands
and thousands probably millions of fans
to be more accurate who absolutely love
her she has as much money as most people
could ever imagine needing or wanting
she has a lifestyle that’s absolutely
phenomenal she has family and friends
that care about her and do anything for
her and yet what happens with this lady
she has not learned to manage her stay
and she pays the price as great as she
is great on the stage but in her
personal life over and over again she
has to turn to food or to drugs to try
and take care of the challenges within
herself see how could someone have it
all and still be unhappy because no
matter how good it is
you can always focus on something that
isn’t perfect or doesn’t match your
expectations and that is called ultimate
failure in life you want to know what I
believe success is success is creating
consistent pleasure in your life and
causing yourself to grow failure is
being able to find pain no matter how
good it is
that’s failure the bottom line is you
have that power and you can change it
right now by understanding that you make
decisions about what to focus on now it
may be true that you’ve got some bad
habits it may be true that right now you
look at what’s worse or you look at
what’s wrong or you see what’s not
working your life and it’s habitual so
you don’t think about it consciously but
you still make the decisions you can
turn off the automatic pilot and take
control and when you do you can
instantly change the quality of your
life the lady I married my wife Becky
one things I love about her more than
anything in the world the reason I
married her probably more than anything
else is this woman is so incredible at
her ability at any moment in time to
focus on what is great in a situation
what is beautiful the most little things
she and I share that power where we can
be in the middle of anything the middle
of turmoil and upsets and frustrations
and in a heartbeat we can stop and we
say hey look
notice that flower notice that sunset or
look in each other’s eyes and say how
did I get so lucky to get you
we have that ability and we share we
reinforce it in each other and it gives
power to our relationship and to our
lives
you have that control all you have to do
is exercise it so what I want to do is
be more specific with you now and how to
do it now first of all let me
demonstrate this
is really true to you I mean you may say
well yeah this makes sense well let’s
take a quick example now this may be an
unfair situation if you’re in a place
that you’re familiar with but let’s try
this right now and if you’re in a place
you’re familiar with you might want to
try it later on in the day when you’re
not familiar with something but let’s
take an example here what I want you to
do right now is that like you if you
would let’s test the power of something
I want you to look around your room the
room you’re in right now or if you’re in
your car you can look out the windows
also but I want you to notice everything
you can see everything you can see and
I’m gonna give you a few seconds that is
brown quick look around the room
everything you can see that’s brown look
around your car look outside everything
can see it Brown quickly everything make
sure you don’t miss anything everything
sees Brown quick quick quick
okay stop close your eyes with your eyes
closed now close your eyes if you’re
driving this is difficult okay so you
might want to try this later as an
exercise but I would like you to do is
close your on it and what I want you to
do with your eyes closed now is tell me
or you know since I’m not there
literally although I may be you never
know but just for now outloud say
everything that’s in this room that is
green oh maybe I hooked you a little bit
huh and we’re waiting for Brown tell me
out loud come on everything that’s green
try this everything in that room that’s
blue everything in the room that is
white and everything in the room that’s
red and now open your eyes and look
around the room and notice everything
you can see in this room that’s green
come on take a good look now something
you may say well there’s nothing this
room is green look behind you there
there’s something green behind you
that’s right what’s blue in this room
now do you see a lot more green do you
see a lot more blue now than you did the
first time unless you’re in a room you
already are super familiar with that is
you’ve already got a picture in your
head and you know it like maybe it’s
your bedroom you know everything even
then you may not have noticed everything
but if you’re in a strange room or your
place you’re not used to what I find is
99% of time people see a lot more blue
and green when I asked them about that
specifically later on in other words
when I asked you to focus on brown bats
what comes up you notice mostly brown
you tend to delete a lot of the other
details isn’t that true now
that relate to life see a lot of people
in life stare at and focus on the brown
in life the shall we say feces of life
and other people they look for the green
they look for its growing they look for
what’s alive that’s what you need to do
see in life we get whatever we focus on
whatever you pay attention to that’s
what you experience in your body
instantly so how do we control our focus
well that’s a good question for years
I’ve been looking at it you know I read
all the books on positive thinking where
they said hey you want to do good you’ve
got to feel good that makes sense and if
you want to feel good do cut the duck
yourself good and picture good well the
challenge with that the challenge with
positive thinking is what we’ve already
talked about problem with positive
thinking is you got to think about it
and it’s a little bit difficult we got
to get ourselves conditioned to think
more positive plus I kept asking the
question how do you think positive I’d
say be positive how well I said you know
make good pictures well how do you get
yourself to do that and so what I’ve
analyzed for years is what determines
since there are zillions of things you
and I could pay attention to at any
moment what determines what we focus on
well some of what we focus on or most of
it is based upon our beliefs of what’s
important and our values and we’re gonna
talk about that in the next tape but for
right now the thing that at this
specific moment determines what you
focus on is how you’re evaluating things
now that sounds like a big chunk but
what do I mean by that well the way we
evaluate things determines how we feel
but what is an evaluation evaluations
are nothing but questions the way I
found this out is one day I was
realizing well you know W Mitchell’s
pretty happy because he’s evaluated his
life in a way that makes him happy John
Belushi’s not here because of the way he
evaluated things he made himself
actually feel bad when he had plenty
could have felt good on if he just
focused on that part of his life’s party
if you will so I thought how do I
explain what an evaluation is and then I
noticed that I had asked a question to
try to evaluate how to explain
evaluations and I thought well is it
possible that evaluations or questions I
thought well that’s a question too isn’t
it
that’s a question isn’t it is that
really what evaluation is is a question
notice that was a question pretty soon
and I’ve whipped myself into a frenzy
and began to realize evaluation
are in fact questions and I tried to
mismatch it that as I tried to look at
the opposite side and I tested in all
kinds of people maybe you can find the
opposite of what I’m saying but I don’t
know I have found that thinking is
nothing but the process of evaluating
things you’re always evaluating what
does this mean to me and what should I
do
those are two questions your brain is
asking on a continuous basis see if I
take my fist and I go wham and I bring
it within two inches of your face I
guarantee you your brain is gonna make
some evaluations question number one
what does this mean question number two
what should I do and your brains gonna
value it it’s gonna search your brain
for your beliefs about what does this
mean do I need to move is it gonna hit
me what does this mean and what should I
do do I hit back do I adjust what what
does my body need to do we’re always
asking those two primary questions but
the questions we ask determine what we
focus on here let me be more specific
and I’ll think you’ll have an example of
what I mean I’ve said to you so far in
this tape that what you focus on
determines how you feel I’ve also said
that the questions you ask yourself
determine what you focus on think of
questions this way imagine your brain is
the ultimate computer and in that
computer is the answer to any question
you could possibly have and by the way I
believe that that metaphor is really how
your brain works
it can come up with the answer to any
question you ask it the Bible says ask
and you shall receive a very true and
real statement beyond what you might
believe religiously even if you have
different religious beliefs it is
reality in my experience of how our
brain works now
if you have this great computer and in
front of you the only way you get
information out this computer is to ask
for it you tap in to this keyboard and
you ask questions and bam and answer the
questions you will get responses on the
screen your brain works the same way you
ask questions you hit the keyboard with
questions and it will fire off the
answers in your brain but here’s what’s
different about your brain than most
computers whatever question you ask if
you ask it with the absolute expectation
that you’re gonna get an answer and if
you ask it consistently and you give it
a brain time to search for the answers
you will get an answer by the way any
question you ask you’ll get an answer to
even one that doesn’t have a basis in
reality in other words this computer
will do anything it’ll search its files
and make things out in order to answer
your question what do I mean
well if you go around ask your brain why
do these things always happen to me
well guess what your brain will search
all its databases and say why do things
always happen to me and it’ll take every
possible form of input of what people
said to you in your life what you’ve
ever said to yourself which you’ve ever
read or saw on TV and I’ll make up an
answer for you it always happens to you
because you’re a turkey that’s why right
and I’m sure enough now you feel lousy
you see gosh I’m a turkey you feel bad
and everything’s not working out
see whatever you ask me to get an answer
to if you say how come I’m so lucky you
know how did I get so lucky your brain
will search all kinds of things and show
you that you’re lucky in other words our
questions determine how we feel enough
you’ve got certain emotions certain
feelings that you have on a daily basis
that you don’t like habitual emotions
I’m here to tell you that the feelings
you feel or come from what you focus on
so what you have is habitual focuses and
those focuses come from habitual
questions in other words if you feel
certain ways on an ongoing basis it’s
because you’re asking certain questions
on an ongoing basis might be useful for
you discover what those are I’ll give
you some samples questions that people
ask themselves on a regular basis that
make them feel lousy
question number one is why does this
always happen to me I want you to notice
in that question is something we call a
presupposition a presupposition means
you’re presupposing in the question the
things already happen to you that may
not be true but as long as you ask
questions that way your brain will make
up an answer for you and I’ll give you a
good example after the 1988 Republican
National Convention when George Bush
selected Dan Quayle as his running mate
CNN ran a public opinion poll where you
called a 900 number and vote yes or no
to the answer to a question but here is
the question it blew my mind
question was does it bother you that Dan
Quayle used his family’s influence to
stay out of Vietnam and again in the
National Guard
now I’m paraphrasing just slightly but
that’s what they said now tell me what’s
wrong with this picture and challenges
they presuppose that he actually did it
they said does it bother you so your
brain stops evaluating whether he
actually did it or not
and focuses on whether it bothers you or
not does this happen every day with you
do you ask questions that presuppose
that you’ve got a limited level of
intelligence or skill or ability and
therefore get lousy answers in your
brain listen if you ask yourself
questions like why am I so fat that
question guarantees you’re gonna stay
fat you know why cuz you go why am I so
fat your brain will go okay let me
figure out some reasons lamo here’s why
you’re fat
cuz you eat continuously and you have no
control your brain goes oh god I already
control and you feel useless and you
feel like you’re disempowered what would
be a better question to ask yourself
then why am I so fat how about this one
how can I become more thin right now or
what could I do today to start myself on
the road to becoming more thin and what
do I need to do consistently to create
the long-term results of health that I
want if you ask a better-quality
question you will get a better quality
answer or I’ll give you step beyond that
if you ask a question like how can I
become more thin now you’ll get an
answer but what if you ask a question
like how can become more thin now and
enjoy the process ah magical when you
ask that question what happens now is
you literally come up with only an
answer of how to lose weight but also
how to enjoy it and since your brain
likes pleasure there’s a much better
chance you’re gonna follow through am I
making any sense to you I’m here to tell
you that the quality of your life comes
down to the quality of the questions you
ask yourself on a daily basis so if
you’re asking questions like well how
come I can’t ever learn anything just
listen to that question or why can’t I
ever learn anything that’s even worse
why questions tend to be what I call
endless loop questions like why does
this happen to me see your brain
probably can never come up with a
definitive answer it’ll come up with all
kinds of reasons but you’ll keep going
into a loop now I discovered the power
of questions in my own life because at
one time my life I was really really
angry and I knew would have changed my
physiology and my movement to make
myself feel better but I didn’t want to
you ever been in that state like
somebody said to me well Tony just
change your physiology I said I don’t
want to all right I was upset but the
reason I was
that is what I was focusing on I was
focusing on somebody who had taken a
bunch of money from my company and
embezzled it and I got pretty upset to
say the least and I was walking around
in a frenzy going how could he do this
how could he have the audacity to do
this I may have even had a next foot of
her – who knows but the point is that by
asking those questions I was whipping
myself into frenzy how could he possibly
do this why would he do this situation
to me well guess what you’re never gonna
get an answer to that all it does is
whip you into more and more of a frenzy
can you hear it so finally I said okay
doing this is leading to more and more
pain isn’t making my life any better I
better ask myself a more empowering
question so I thought what’s something
that’s important to me
my answer is I love to learn I already
shared that with you so I said okay what
can I learn from this well guess what my
brain likes learning so it was willing
to focus on that question and you know
what out of that question of what can I
learn from this over the next three
months
I literally developed a whole new level
of understanding about what makes human
beings do what they do I develop
literally a whole new technology which I
call destiny technologies and I now do a
whole seminar called your date with
destiny and when we help people
literally design their life so they are
literally pulled forward in the
direction they want their life to be
rather than having all this
self-sabotage and challenges that come
up for people the most incredible
program I do it all came out of me
taking a horrible situation and asking a
better question what kind of learn from
this what can I get out of this that
would enhance my life and other people’s
as well how can I use this situation to
create much more power in my ability to
help people and help myself
asking these questions allowed me to
search my brains data banks and create
tremendous power out of that situation
after I was in that situation I had
other times when I get upset unbearably
when I get upset it’s because I was
asking a why question why did this
person do this I don’t understand or how
could they possibly have done it because
I would never do that how could they do
that I’ll never get the answer based on
that so I learned to ask the question
what can I learn from this now for you
that might not be the right question
maybe learning is not important enough
for you a brain to go while I’m willing
to focus on that now instead of the
problem but my brain I pick learning or
I pick something like well if I’m angry
at somebody I might
say well what do I respect about this
person now I remember one particular guy
said what do I respect about him
it was this guy who’d stolen a bunch of
my stuff and I thought well at least
he’s using my stuff you know I do
respect him he’s at least using it he is
I’m just sitting back there right
sitting on his haunches here in stop
he’s at least using it I respect that
what else do I respect about him well
well he’s at least going for it and you
know even though I don’t think he’s
doing for the right reason he’s probably
helping a few people who knows you know
and I began to literally feel better
that again ask myself this question
what’s actually funny about this that I
hadn’t noticed
great question ask yourself what’s
actually funny about this I hadn’t
noticed now again when you ask a
question you got to be willing to really
search for the answer if you go well
it’s great about this that I had noticed
or what you notice what’s humorous about
this I didn’t notice and guess what
there’s no way your brains not gonna go
for it but if you ask with a sincere
interest and desire for an answer you
will get one if you keep asking and so
all sudden I start noticing things about
their humors I start laughing hey listen
we’ve all heard the phrase someday we’ll
look back and laugh on this situation
well if that’s really true why wait why
not look back and laugh on it now why
wait for years before you can feel good
about something again and the way to do
it is change your focus the way to
change your focus is use questions
they’re much more powerful than any
other tool I’ve noticed I’ll tell you
why questions basically do three things
when you ask a question number one when
you ask somebody a question it instantly
changes what they focus on and therefore
it changes the way you feel instantly
see if you’re feeling lousy and I come
along and I get you to answer a question
like well let me ask you a question what
is great in your life right now you oh
well nothing I go on I know nothing is
but if there was something that was
great you know what what could be great
in your life if I get you to really
think about it what it makes your brain
do is search your files and you know
what no matter how bad your life may
seem there’s something great going on
there’s no doubt about it you know
here you are and all your friends is
weaking or skiing but you’re home
studying for a big test do you feel
cheated you feel left out you feel hurt
hey listen all you need is a little
contrast for yourself what’s great right
now this weekend you’re studying things
that can make a huge difference in the
quality of your life forever
these people are gonna work their
muscles and come back and probably
forget about that situation right or
you’re not in a Nazi concentration camp
there’s a little contrast for you you
get to be learning because you choose to
not because you’re forced to you’re
studying something that you chose to
study you’re actually creating a future
for yourself you’re getting to use your
brain there’s so many things you could
focus on you’re in a free country
you’re alive you’ve got friends yet
people that care about you there are
millions of things you can feel good
about all you have to do is change your
focus and if you don’t you end up like
the John Belushi’s of the world think
about it see the choice is yours so if I
ask you a question like what could be
great in your life or what’s great right
now if you really think about it you can
come up with something think about it
right now
what’s really great in your life right
now what’s something that you feel
really great about think about it or
what could you feel great about if you
wanted to as you think about things that
make you feel great
notice how it makes you feel when you
think about that what about that why
does that make you feel great how does
that make you feel inside when you feel
those feelings and you know what you can
change your state instantly just by
focusing on that at any moment in time
so the first thing questions do is they
change our focus and therefore our state
immediately the second thing that
questions do is they change what we’re
deleting now remember in order to feel
unhappy you have to focus on the things
that would make you unhappy and you have
to delete all the great things that are
happening in your life
isn’t that true in other words every one
of us right now could get depressed
piece of cake
all we have to do is focus on all the
tragedy that’s happening the world right
now even little pieces of it children
they’re dying right now starvation we
can make pictures and I head out those
bloated stomachs hearing the cries of
babies just as they pass off into death
seem flies eating their flesh how’s that
for graphic at the same time every one
of us could be an absolute total
pleasure interrupts that pattern of a
picture you’re looking at and think of
something like create total pleasure and
you know what there is alien things but
to do that you have to stop
saying you have to delete all the
negativity in the world and focus on
things that make it feel great so you
could focus on a relationship you have
you could focus on how much you’ve
already learned in the last six or seven
or eight days you could focus on the
people that loved you you could focus on
your ability as a human being to change
your life at any moment in time you
could focus on what learning means to
you you could focus on the Sun you could
focus on breathing fresh air you could
focus on the fact you live in a free
country you could focus on the fact that
you have a connection with your Creator
you could focus on anything and feel
incredible you could focus on new babies
being born this moment they had a
greater opportunity in life than any
time in our history there’s so much we
could focus on it feel good about the
challenge is this you must control it
through questions questions change what
we delete we’re always deleting human
beings we’re not gonna stop deleting
things as long as we’re gonna delete
things why not delete things that
disempower you and focus on the things
that empower you does that make sense
the third thing that questions do is
they help you to get access to resources
within yourself I’m a big believer that
anything you’ve ever wanted to
accomplish you’ve already got the
resources inside of you to make it
happen that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t
go out and learn from somebody else or
model the success of others I’m just
saying the things you need to succeed
are already in your core the resources
are there you just need to get access to
them by asking better questions I’ll
give an example if I ask myself
questions like gosh can I really do this
that creates a feeling of doubt to hear
that does that and that feeling of doubt
will keep me in a state where I’m not
gonna get the most out of myself but if
instead I ask myself question like how
can I make this thing happen right now
more powerfully than I ever dreamed of
and have fun doing it if I keep asking
that question my brain will get access
to more of my ability because whatever I
asked for my brain will give me but if
you ask your brain can I really do this
and you do it with a tone of voice of
doubt you are gonna get access to the
resources called doubt does that make
sense if you think about it the greatest
communicators the greatest teachers of
all time were not people that so much
taught us as they did ask us they shared
things with us but they got us to use
our own resources they asked questions
all the great
speakers of dumbness hey Martin Luther
King asked questions about a dream John
F Kennedy asked don’t ask what your
country can do for you ask what you can
do for your country he wanted you to
take the resources out of yourself and
contribute and expand our country you
must learn to ask habitual questions
that empower you I want you to know that
I believe the success in my life has all
come down to one basic skill state
management on a consistent basis I’ve
learned how to manage my state and
therefore I’ve been able to get myself
to breakthrough and take action with
very few people around me were able to
do the same they were able to that’s
probably not the best description they
weren’t using their power because they
didn’t have access to all of it and I’ve
done that by every day doing things that
would increase my physical ability
flexibility power energy by the way I’m
moving the way I breathe and also by
consistently and daily conditioning
myself to ask the kinds of questions to
create the kinds of focus that moves me
towards larger levels of contribution
and joy and fun and success and passion
instead of the things that would pull me
down that would pull me to areas of
frustration and anger and giving up
listen there is no capability difference
between you and someone you consider to
be an ultimate role model of success the
only difference is they’ve learned to
use their mind and body with more power
on a consistent basis they’ve learned a
manager state they’ve learned to use
their body effectively whether they know
it or not consciously doesn’t matter
a lot of people do things without being
aware of how they do it and they’ve
learned to control their mental focus
remember whatever we concentrate our
focus on consistently and strive to
learn from and make new distinctions
about we will get great at I don’t care
what it is if you focus on it daily and
you strive to do better you’re gonna
make little distinctions that’ll make
you more and more effective every single
day so you better decide what you want
to focus on in your life and what you
want to experience on a daily basis cuz
that’s where your power is gonna come
from that’s where your power is gonna
emit from that’s the genesis of your
power I want you to know that many
things that you think are impossible or
difficult are only difficult or
impossible because of the way you’re
focusing on things you’re focusing on
how it can’t be done and you can
remember whatever you focus on is what
you
yet so if you focus on how it can’t be
done you are absolutely right and no
one’s gonna prove you wrong
so why not focus on what’s possible and
create that I mean that’s how I created
things like the firewalk seminar all I
did was hold a new level of possibility
instead of focusing on how it couldn’t
be done or how it was a terrible thing
or something like that I focused on hey
this is an incredible example of
possibility and if other people can do
it my focus and my question is if they
can do it then how can we do it how can
I share it with other people how could
it be used as an empowering experience
it’s a lot of fun I did the same thing
with teach people wood breaking you know
I teach people out of break wood karate
style not in two years but in about 20
minutes again not to make them this
powerful person but to show them that by
simply changing their mental focus by
controlling their physical emotional
state and by modeling someone’s success
that they can get results in 30 minutes
that takes most people two years and
they have what we call a breakthrough
literally I want you to know that you
have every right at any moment of time
to feel lousy to feel bad to feel sorry
to feel hurt I am NOT saying by this
tape program that you should never be
disappointed or frustrated or angry or
anything else because all of those
emotions have their place in their
proper proportion hey some of my
greatest frustrations or angers or
upsets or would have driven some of my
greatest successes because it’s made me
search for more but see what’s
interesting is the pain drove me but
what changed me from other people who
just gave up is I ask better questions
I found a way say what can I learn from
this how can I grow from this how can I
expand from this what can I take from
this experience that’ll empower me what
can I learn from this so I never have to
experience it again and by asking
empowering questions how can I take
advantage of this what’s the actual
benefit in this situation that I
probably hadn’t noticed I began to find
benefits whereas other people said why
did this happen to me why does this
always happen to me why did you do this
to me Lord how come I’m not smart enough
to pull this off why do I keep self
sabotaging see that’s the difference
between success and failures so I want
you to know I’m not saying you can’t
feel bad I’m just saying and when you’re
done feeling bad here’s how to change
and you may not want to spend quite so
much time feeling bad in the future
because feeling bad is based on focus if
you change your focus you can feel good
instantly
right now at this moment now so let me
ask you a few questions and what I’d
like you to do for your homework is
designed some questions every morning my
life I wake up and I ask myself
questions now
the truth is you already do this too the
only problem is you’re not doing it
consciously think about it when you’re
shaving are you thinking and talking to
yourself know that the process of
thinking is nothing but asking and
answering questions you’re doing it
constantly that’s where your thoughts
come from think about it now you might
say well no that’s not true or yes it is
true if you said no it’s true or yes it
is it’s cuz you ask yourself the
question is that true or something like
it
see some of the questions you ask are
subconscious your brain is deciding all
the time if I get in this car if I turn
here what’s gonna happen is that car
coming too close or too far you’re
asking questions constantly
subconsciously but you’re also doing it
consciously when you’re shaving or
putting on your makeup or shampooing
you’re asking questions but it might be
questions like God why do I always have
to do this why do I have to go to work
today think about the kind of states
that those questions create and what
would be some more empowering questions
like what can I do today that will make
today more fun than ever before what can
I do today that would create a
breakthrough in my business what could I
do today to connect more with my family
members
I wonder what’s gonna happen today
that’ll make me feel total pleasure for
no reason I wonder what I’ll see today
that I haven’t seen before see those
kinds of questions will empower you
if you’re bored it’s cuz you ask lousy
questions probably ask questions like
why do I have to do this why do we do
this all the time why do we always do
these things versus looking around
saying God what could I notice today
that I haven’t noticed before
see what can I see today they haven’t
seen before what could I smell today I
haven’t smelled before
see it’s called directing your computer
so here’s some questions you might want
to answer right now in your own mind and
notice how they make you feel question 1
what are you really most happy about
your life right now what’s one of the
things you’re most happy about in your
life right now answer that question in
your own head what are you most happy
about in your life right now or if your
brain goes nothing what could you be
happy about if you wanted to be if you
ever asked a question yourself and
somebody says well I don’t feel that way
or I don’t think that way so I know you
don’t but if you did or if you could
what could you feel happy about right
now think about it have you
or something well good let me ask a
third question how does that make you
feel really allow yourself to feel don’t
just go well makes me floppy feel the
feelings what else are you really happy
about in your life right now think of a
second thing what else are you really
happy about in your life right now what
about that makes you feel happy how does
that make you feel here’s the second
question for you what are you really
excited about in your life right now
what are you really excited about in
your life right now answer the question
in your mind think about it or what
could you be excited about if you wanted
to be excited about something think
about it oh come on you got more things
to be excited about think what about
that makes you excited why does that
make you excited how does it make you
feel what else you excited about your
life right now come on what else what
else are you really excited about in
your life right now or could you be
excited about if you wanted to how does
that make you feel here’s a third
question for you what are you really
grateful for in your life right now what
are you really grateful for in your life
right now what are some of the things
you’re grateful for what could you be
grateful for if you wanted to be answer
the question honestly how does that make
you feel I want you to notice do you
feel state changes you answer these
questions from where you were a few
moments before that’s it so you can
change your state instantly and you can
make yourself feel great there’s so much
to feel grateful for if you want my
formula for wealth it’s real simple live
everyday in an attitude of gratitude see
the more you feel like you have the more
you’ll experience in your life and the
more you’ll be willing to give see make
sure that you’re always trying to give
more than you take back and feel
grateful for everything you have and you
will be wealthy beyond your wildest
dreams but you got to control your focus
let me ask you another one what are you
really proud of in your life right now
what are you really proud about in your
life right now or what could you be
proud about in your life so far what are
some of the things what about those
things makes you feel proud how does
that make you feel what else are you
how does that make you feel and here’s a
final question for you who do you really
love most in your life and who loves you
think about it and don’t just go oh my
mom I did get some feeling step into
those experiences and feel what it feels
like think about who loves you and how
that makes you feel who do you love and
how does that make you feel to love that
person so much I had a question for you
what if every morning you started out
asking yourself a series of questions
that put you in this kind of state
there’s some real power to see the state
you’re in affects the way you look at
your whole world doesn’t it affects the
way you breathe the way you feel the way
you treat other people and your level of
success see a lot of people teaching
life do bunch affirmations go I’m happy
I’m FBI mmmmmm I’m happy and then your
brain goes B s alright now if you do
affirmations long enough they may work
because your brain may get bored and say
well why am i happy at which time it’ll
search your brain for an answer and then
also and you’ll feel happy that’s what
happens when you do affirmations or if
you go ahead and happy I’m happy I’m
happy I’m happy I’m happy and you really
create the physiology of happiness you
know what I mean by that by using your
voice that way then what you’ve done is
the affirmation didn’t do it so much
that’s putting your body in that state
so affirmations are great but what are
those questions are even more powerful
because now you have a reason to be
happy you’re not just jumping yourself
up and running around with what I call a
perma-grin where people go why are you
happy and go I don’t know but it feels
good it’s better to have all these
reasons so every morning you stack more
reasons to be happy you come up with
more reasons that you’re proud more
reasons to be grateful more reasons to
feel excited about life more
feelings of love if you stack those
every day you literally anchor them in
your nervous system this is part of what
I call destiny technology’s controlling
your state through asking yourself
effective questions this is the power of
focus and here’s your exercise pull out
your success journal and right now I
want you to write down five questions
after you’ve designed these five
questions what I’d like you to ask
yourself to do is this first of all let
me ask you this if every single morning
you got up and asked yourself five
custom design questions that put you in
peak States and they gave you lots of
reasons to feel phenomenal so you
weren’t just some guy out there again
just babbling about how excited you are
without any reasons for it I’m not
talking about being somebody who just
all pumped up for no reason but if every
day you came up with lots of reasons and
felt these powerful emotions what would
that do to the quality of your life what
would that do to your days would it be
worth developing some new habits if your
answer to these questions is yes then
I’d like to challenge you to do
something I’d like you to develop a new
habit a one that will literally
conditioned your nervous system to
associate powerful emotions with waking
up in the morning wouldn’t that be nice
here’s what I want you to do if you’re
willing to take on the challenge for the
rest of this program approximately what
twenty two more days each morning I want
you to answer those five questions and
every time you answer them you’ve got to
create some feelings so if one of your
questions was what am I most excited
about my life you got to come up with at
least two different answers and you got
to think about why you’re excited how
great that makes you feel you got to
actually feel the answer the question
two answers to each of your five
questions each morning again this is not
added work you’re already asking
questions you just may be asking
questions like oh gosh why do I have to
get up at this hour
that may not be the best question to ask
when the alarm goes off maybe you want
to install a new one that empowers you
would you be willing to do that for the
rest of this 30-day program now I don’t
want you to do this for the rest of your
life because you might get addicted of
feeling excellent for the rest of your
life and gosh only knows what would
happen to you then
so don’t go any longer than these 30
days for sure but at least for the
thirty days would you be willing to try
it
okay then go for it so you know your
assignment design five questions that
will get resources out of you make
you feel phenomenal each day that’ll
make you get access to your real powered
ability every single day also I want to
say to you please use your success
journal to write down each day a little
bit about what’s happening to you
what are you noticing have you already
begun to notice that your attitude has
changed obviously but also if you notice
that maybe you’re willing to take some
chances do you’re being more decisive
you’re taking some actions you’ve been
may be more powerful in some of your
communication
have you decided maybe to take some
actions like lose weight or stop smoking
and you’re like day three or four of
that or are you just feeling better
about the possibilities of your future
now that one’s each day you might want
to just keep a journal jot down a couple
of key ideas about what you learn that
day or what you’re experiencing in your
daily life besides this program I’ve
kept journals for years because I
believe that if my life is worth living
it’s worth recording and for me what
journals are as a way to go back and
notice my growth because otherwise what
happens for a lot of us is we get caught
up but if you have a journal you can
look and see how you’ve grown in your
development and your ability and where
you are in your life in addition your
journals are things that you can give
later on to your children someday they
can look back and learn from the lessons
you’ve learned in your life so they’re
invaluable I hope you’ll decide to keep
a success journal on an ongoing basis
after this program but see if you get
yourself in the habit right now for the next 30 days
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