growing up Will Smith was someone who I
always looked up to he was funny he was
positive he was charismatic he was
confident everyone loved being around
him from starting off as a Grammy
award-winning rapper
– then starring in the hit TV show The
Fresh Prince of bel-air – now appearing
in blood Buster after blood Buster hits
in the movie theaters it’s fair to say
Will Smith has accomplished a lot and
one of the things people love him for is
how he’s always himself and that’s one
of the things I’ve always been
fascinated by hey my name is Edwin
Torres and in today’s breakdown series
you’re going to learn how to not care
what other people think about you like
Will Smith one of the ways we’re going
to do that is by studying his Instagram
account you see well has only had an
Instagram for about a year or so but
he’s already become one of the most
popular people on there with an
Instagram account of over 18 million
followers people love him what’s his
secret it has something to do with the
first tip of this video which is that
he’s mastered the art of self-amusement
self-amusement is when you’re doing or
saying things purity to entertain or
make you happy it’s those moments when
you’re telling a funny story and you
can’t help but start laughing right
before the punchline even hits and just
said cracking up by yourself it’s in
that moment where you’re totally happy
and totally immersed in your own world
that’s the perfect example of self-abuse
the great thing about will is he isn’t
afraid to put himself out there or do
things that he finds funny he doesn’t
take himself so seriously
which makes him come across a lot more
[Music]
there’s no way no way this is legal but
anomie is really stood up Graham yes we
gotta feel move a foot a trunk here mean
it gotta make some choices they run it
out of options
woke up this morning in my feelings and
I was like I got I gotta let them out I
so we all got our surprise moves we
but there’s an important distinction I
want you to make when it comes to
self-amusement
you don’t want to take it to the extreme
where you become a quote and quote clown
and when I say clown I’m not talking
about the ones you hire for kids parties
I’m talking about people who act overly
goofy just to gain the attention and the
approval from others this is validation
seeking at its finest because you feel
that you have to put on a show just to
get people like you when the reality
would just have the opposite effect
people won’t take you seriously at all
this is the wrong mindset to have but
don’t worry it happens to the best of us
because even till this day I have to
catch myself sometimes when I want to
slip into that overly goofy or to try
hard zone there’s a powerful quote I
heard from a success coach Cobb Jason
Capital which goes the world tends to
accept whatever judgment you place on
yourself that right there is one of the
best ways to master self-amusement
or get you into the mindset of saying
the things you want to say instead of
only saying certain things just because
they’ll get you a positive reaction when
you think that everything that comes out
of your mouth is interesting or at a
minimum worth listening to then other
people will think so too but the
opposite is true too if you think that
everything that comes out of your mouth
is unimportant
then the other people won’t value it
either let’s take a look at this next
clip what’s up y’all
I made a post yesterday about mission
and purpose and I got a comment from
Augie del Rey and Augie said what if
your purpose isn’t materializing what
then everyone talks about purpose and
sticking with it but what if that’s not
happening you know I think a big part of
finding
your mission and your purpose and your
meaning comes from exploring and
experiencing you know the the universe
teaches through experience you know it’s
why like I like to travel and meet so
many different people you got to explore
and and you have to experience it’s like
that’s how you open the dialog with with
the universe to get those answers I
think also creating and relating like
you create something you use your gifts
and you give them to the world and part
of creating is understanding the
relationship between you and the rest of
the universe and the human family so I
think it’s really important to hone your
gifts to constantly be creating and
elevating your gifts and then give it
giving them and then working in that
exchange with the universe so I would I
would say explore experience create and
relate your mission and your purpose is
always going to be about what is your
contribution to the human family how are
how are you a benefit to existence to
how are you a benefit to your friends to
your family and to the world what is
your contribution to the human family is
always going to be where you find your
mission and purpose in that clip what
was giving his advice on how to find
your mission and purpose in life and if
we’re being totally objective and I’m
the biggest Will Smith fan in the world
okay a lot of what he said isn’t really
mind-blowing or brand-new stuff right
but the certainty with which he delivers
that message you can’t help but take it
seriously remember the world tends to
accept whatever judgment you place on
yourself and this quote doesn’t just
work for self-amusement
it works in any area of your life where
you need that little extra boost of
confidence to perform at your best use
that and run with it the next tip
piggyback a little bit off the last one
and it is that people will trust like
and respect you more when you are
authentic so what does it mean to be
authentic the best way I’ve heard it
explained is you are not being authentic
in any moment we’re number one you’re
trying to look good or number two you’re
trying to avoid looking you’re bad
whenever you’re doing any of those two
things you’re not truly being yourself
you see being authentic is one of the
major pillars for building confidence
and becoming more magnetic to people if
you’re interested in persuasion there’s
a man called Blair Warren who spent a
lot of time researching and studying
coats and mass movements to try to
figure out what did they do to be able
to influence and sometimes brainwash
millions of people and after years of
research he found the answer is crazy
and he condensed it into one sentence
but fair warning this sentence if you
master and use it wisely can help you
attract more people into your life
here’s what it is people will do
anything for those who encourage their
dreams justify their failures and lay
their fears confirm their suspicions and
help them throw rocks at their enemies
now I can make a whole video breaking
down each part of that sentence but the
core message I really want you to take
from it is that people like being around
other people who they can relate to and
that they see themselves in that means
you’ll be more liked or respected and
sought after if you’re not afraid to
show your flaws and insecurities when
you do that you come across as relatable
and trustworthy even well realized how
important this was in these next few
Clips when I started the the the only
way to be a movie star was through
distance and mystery and mystique right
that was the the the way is that you
know
yeah you could see me on July 4 in the
movie theater right so that was the way
keeping that distance was how you
maintained star power and in the last
five years that shifted much more to a
friendship model like people support
artists that they feel like they know
thoroughly that they’re friends right so
that the social media the the daily
interaction is much more like a family
friendship kind of interaction that is
an audience demand for their loyalty
when I was with Madiba on this trip he
pulled me aside and he asked me to stay
with him for a while he said that he
felt a great mission for me and that he
had things to teach me I felt so
unworthy of his attention and so wildly
unprepared for the responsibilities of
his wisdom that I ran and I’m not really
a man that is prone to regret but not
staying with him is one of the greatest
regrets of my life
one of the beautiful parts of social
media that I think is a beautiful
evolutionary thing is that social media
demands authenticity right so social
media pushes you more and more into
having to reveal what’s true because if
you don’t you know TMZ is going to you
know so it’s you know it’s a beautiful
thing I’m and I’m actually enjoying the
push right
nobody’s happy who doesn’t get to beat
himself right so the the the eyes and
ears of the world are starting to demand
more and more authenticity where you
gotta say was true for you and live or
die by what that is so I’m enjoying the
the social demand for authenticity you
might think that by always being
polished and perfect other people will
like you more but you have to realize
and I’ve learned this lesson the hard
way that people will still judge you
positive or negative whether you show
them that perfect version of you or not
so might as well just be yourself and
stop caring what other people think
about you let’s start wrapping up this
video with the final tip one of the most
profound things I’ve learned lately is
this concept of stories and how everyone
around you is stuck in one and by
stories I’m not talking about movies or
books I’m talking about the stories that
you attach to the things that happen to
you see we’re all constantly stuck in a
story whether that story is that I say
the right thing do they like me do I
look stupid right now and so on and so
on all of these negative thoughts are
just stories that you’re putting on top
of the things that happen to you in life
you see there’s no denying that someone
may have done you wrong or they might
have talked crap about you or they might
have done something that really made you
feel a certain way that did happen but
what didn’t happen is everything that
you’re putting on top of it after that
if you attach any meaning to what’s
happened and you’re only giving more
power to what that person did or said to
you and when what actually happened and
the story of
– you think happened going someone they
make this beautiful love and they
collapse into each other
that’s how irrational fears and limiting
beliefs are created interesting right
let’s take a look at will telling the
story of the one time a reporter in the
red carpet came up to him tried giving
him a big smooch on the cheek and who
was having none of it he slapped him
quick before anything else happened and
one thought that everybody would react
negatively to that but he was surprised
when people were actually being positive
and were were praising him for it it’s
fine just fine that remind me I was in
Russia and it was like probably a year
and a half two years ago I don’t know if
you I remember when the that like one of
the reporters tried to kiss me yeah
that’s right so I was in Russia so I get
back I’m pissed like there’s somebody
like think cuz you famous they get to do
whatever they want to do so I’m in my
room and I have ten urgent messages from
jay-z and I’m laying eggs like Jay don’t
hit you or he’s like call me now with
exclamation points I wasn’t yo like Jay
Jay don’t do that in right so I get a
knock out yo what’s up and he sounds
when did he say yo yo sup man what’s up
so y’all wolves had me he said hey I
just saw the video of you slapping to do
it Russia he’s I just want you to know
you’ll never make a better piece of
entertainment it’s the funniest thing
I’ve ever seen
is it me and B we got a show tonight and
we thinking about canceling it and just
staying in and watching you slap this
dude but it was like it was yeah you
know we talked about it after he was
like it was such a breath of fresh air
to see you just be yeah authentic right
that’s what you know that’s what you
were feeling and that was like one of
the first things and I was like cuz I’m
like it was my natural reaction but it
was
it was my space I’m from Philly like yo
but I thought that it would be negative
and everything and in this new yeah
social media world it actually the
authenticity was accepted and respected
and that was a really that was a nice
thing for me I want you to take a look
at your life how many stories are you
running in your head I learned that a
lot of overthinking was actually just me
putting fake stories onto things that
happen to me I was making up all these
complex scenarios in my head about what
they meant to say or what they could
have said or what I could have done and
it just led to a lot of stress anxiety
and overthinking once I realize these
were all just a bunch of stories running
in my head I felt almost a sense of
peace this is a powerful exercise that I
recommend you practice and become more
aware of you’ll start to discover other
areas in your life where you stress
about things that don’t even matter and
you’ll start to raise your own belief
and confidence in yourself I was just
talking to a friend of mine and we were
talking about self-esteem and we were
talking about how we tend to base our
self-esteem on what other people think
and that’s not really self-esteem
self-esteem is supposed to be how we
feel about ourselves and I was just
saying how dangerous it is to allow
other people to determine how you’re
going to feel about you and it’s kind of
like looking into a broken mirror you’re
gonna look at a broken mirror and then
change your face to try to look good in
this defiled busted broken mirror and it
just other people’s opinions there’s a
really way to determine how we feel
about ourselves and that’s all I’m gonna
say about where and there you have it
those are my three tips to not care what
other people think about you like Will
Smith to recap they were number one
practice self-amusement do or say things
that you find funny amuse
or at a minimum just make you happy tip
number two don’t be afraid to show your
flaws or insecurities don’t be someone
who always feels like they have to put
on a perfect image of themselves okay
people like connecting and talking and
building connections of other people who
they number one can relate to and number
two and they can see a little bit of
themselves and it’s better to show
people what you’re afraid of or Dunham
when you’re insecure about instead of
coming across as this macho man or this
macho woman who is not afraid of
anything
tip number three know the difference
between the story and what actually
happened I want you to know that
whenever anything important or
traumatising or kind of shocking happens
to you you’re going to want to attach a
story to that okay this is totally
normal
it’s important that you become aware to
this because you have to know that what
happened did happen okay there’s no
denying that that did happen but the
story that you’re trying to attach to it
did not happen and if you listen to that
story it’s just gonna keep building and
building and build more power and it’s
just gonna have a hold on your life and
you’re never really gonna be truly free
and liberated okay so stop the stories
live like an awesome listen this isn’t
only advice I’m giving to you I’m
actively trying to apply these tips in
my own life make sure you leave a
comment below let me know which tip was
your favorite and while you’re down
there let me know which celebrity you
want me to break down next this was
Edwin Torres from next-level confidence
and I’ll catch you next time raise your
standard Apple at the core its core
values is that we believe that people
with passion can change
not one drop of my self-worth depends on
your acceptance of me I don’t ever give
up I’d have to be dead or completely
incapacitated hey believe nation if you
want to see my all-time favorite top 10
rows a success I have a very special
secret video for you these are the
individual clips that I have personally
learned the most from and applied to my
life and my business check the link in description for details
always looked up to he was funny he was
positive he was charismatic he was
confident everyone loved being around
him from starting off as a Grammy
award-winning rapper
– then starring in the hit TV show The
Fresh Prince of bel-air – now appearing
in blood Buster after blood Buster hits
in the movie theaters it’s fair to say
Will Smith has accomplished a lot and
one of the things people love him for is
how he’s always himself and that’s one
of the things I’ve always been
fascinated by hey my name is Edwin
Torres and in today’s breakdown series
you’re going to learn how to not care
what other people think about you like
Will Smith one of the ways we’re going
to do that is by studying his Instagram
account you see well has only had an
Instagram for about a year or so but
he’s already become one of the most
popular people on there with an
Instagram account of over 18 million
followers people love him what’s his
secret it has something to do with the
first tip of this video which is that
he’s mastered the art of self-amusement
self-amusement is when you’re doing or
saying things purity to entertain or
make you happy it’s those moments when
you’re telling a funny story and you
can’t help but start laughing right
before the punchline even hits and just
said cracking up by yourself it’s in
that moment where you’re totally happy
and totally immersed in your own world
that’s the perfect example of self-abuse
the great thing about will is he isn’t
afraid to put himself out there or do
things that he finds funny he doesn’t
take himself so seriously
which makes him come across a lot more
[Music]
there’s no way no way this is legal but
anomie is really stood up Graham yes we
gotta feel move a foot a trunk here mean
it gotta make some choices they run it
out of options
woke up this morning in my feelings and
I was like I got I gotta let them out I
so we all got our surprise moves we
but there’s an important distinction I
want you to make when it comes to
self-amusement
you don’t want to take it to the extreme
where you become a quote and quote clown
and when I say clown I’m not talking
about the ones you hire for kids parties
I’m talking about people who act overly
goofy just to gain the attention and the
approval from others this is validation
seeking at its finest because you feel
that you have to put on a show just to
get people like you when the reality
would just have the opposite effect
people won’t take you seriously at all
this is the wrong mindset to have but
don’t worry it happens to the best of us
because even till this day I have to
catch myself sometimes when I want to
slip into that overly goofy or to try
hard zone there’s a powerful quote I
heard from a success coach Cobb Jason
Capital which goes the world tends to
accept whatever judgment you place on
yourself that right there is one of the
best ways to master self-amusement
or get you into the mindset of saying
the things you want to say instead of
only saying certain things just because
they’ll get you a positive reaction when
you think that everything that comes out
of your mouth is interesting or at a
minimum worth listening to then other
people will think so too but the
opposite is true too if you think that
everything that comes out of your mouth
is unimportant
then the other people won’t value it
either let’s take a look at this next
clip what’s up y’all
I made a post yesterday about mission
and purpose and I got a comment from
Augie del Rey and Augie said what if
your purpose isn’t materializing what
then everyone talks about purpose and
sticking with it but what if that’s not
happening you know I think a big part of
finding
your mission and your purpose and your
meaning comes from exploring and
experiencing you know the the universe
teaches through experience you know it’s
why like I like to travel and meet so
many different people you got to explore
and and you have to experience it’s like
that’s how you open the dialog with with
the universe to get those answers I
think also creating and relating like
you create something you use your gifts
and you give them to the world and part
of creating is understanding the
relationship between you and the rest of
the universe and the human family so I
think it’s really important to hone your
gifts to constantly be creating and
elevating your gifts and then give it
giving them and then working in that
exchange with the universe so I would I
would say explore experience create and
relate your mission and your purpose is
always going to be about what is your
contribution to the human family how are
how are you a benefit to existence to
how are you a benefit to your friends to
your family and to the world what is
your contribution to the human family is
always going to be where you find your
mission and purpose in that clip what
was giving his advice on how to find
your mission and purpose in life and if
we’re being totally objective and I’m
the biggest Will Smith fan in the world
okay a lot of what he said isn’t really
mind-blowing or brand-new stuff right
but the certainty with which he delivers
that message you can’t help but take it
seriously remember the world tends to
accept whatever judgment you place on
yourself and this quote doesn’t just
work for self-amusement
it works in any area of your life where
you need that little extra boost of
confidence to perform at your best use
that and run with it the next tip
piggyback a little bit off the last one
and it is that people will trust like
and respect you more when you are
authentic so what does it mean to be
authentic the best way I’ve heard it
explained is you are not being authentic
in any moment we’re number one you’re
trying to look good or number two you’re
trying to avoid looking you’re bad
whenever you’re doing any of those two
things you’re not truly being yourself
you see being authentic is one of the
major pillars for building confidence
and becoming more magnetic to people if
you’re interested in persuasion there’s
a man called Blair Warren who spent a
lot of time researching and studying
coats and mass movements to try to
figure out what did they do to be able
to influence and sometimes brainwash
millions of people and after years of
research he found the answer is crazy
and he condensed it into one sentence
but fair warning this sentence if you
master and use it wisely can help you
attract more people into your life
here’s what it is people will do
anything for those who encourage their
dreams justify their failures and lay
their fears confirm their suspicions and
help them throw rocks at their enemies
now I can make a whole video breaking
down each part of that sentence but the
core message I really want you to take
from it is that people like being around
other people who they can relate to and
that they see themselves in that means
you’ll be more liked or respected and
sought after if you’re not afraid to
show your flaws and insecurities when
you do that you come across as relatable
and trustworthy even well realized how
important this was in these next few
Clips when I started the the the only
way to be a movie star was through
distance and mystery and mystique right
that was the the the way is that you
know
yeah you could see me on July 4 in the
movie theater right so that was the way
keeping that distance was how you
maintained star power and in the last
five years that shifted much more to a
friendship model like people support
artists that they feel like they know
thoroughly that they’re friends right so
that the social media the the daily
interaction is much more like a family
friendship kind of interaction that is
an audience demand for their loyalty
when I was with Madiba on this trip he
pulled me aside and he asked me to stay
with him for a while he said that he
felt a great mission for me and that he
had things to teach me I felt so
unworthy of his attention and so wildly
unprepared for the responsibilities of
his wisdom that I ran and I’m not really
a man that is prone to regret but not
staying with him is one of the greatest
regrets of my life
one of the beautiful parts of social
media that I think is a beautiful
evolutionary thing is that social media
demands authenticity right so social
media pushes you more and more into
having to reveal what’s true because if
you don’t you know TMZ is going to you
know so it’s you know it’s a beautiful
thing I’m and I’m actually enjoying the
push right
nobody’s happy who doesn’t get to beat
himself right so the the the eyes and
ears of the world are starting to demand
more and more authenticity where you
gotta say was true for you and live or
die by what that is so I’m enjoying the
the social demand for authenticity you
might think that by always being
polished and perfect other people will
like you more but you have to realize
and I’ve learned this lesson the hard
way that people will still judge you
positive or negative whether you show
them that perfect version of you or not
so might as well just be yourself and
stop caring what other people think
about you let’s start wrapping up this
video with the final tip one of the most
profound things I’ve learned lately is
this concept of stories and how everyone
around you is stuck in one and by
stories I’m not talking about movies or
books I’m talking about the stories that
you attach to the things that happen to
you see we’re all constantly stuck in a
story whether that story is that I say
the right thing do they like me do I
look stupid right now and so on and so
on all of these negative thoughts are
just stories that you’re putting on top
of the things that happen to you in life
you see there’s no denying that someone
may have done you wrong or they might
have talked crap about you or they might
have done something that really made you
feel a certain way that did happen but
what didn’t happen is everything that
you’re putting on top of it after that
if you attach any meaning to what’s
happened and you’re only giving more
power to what that person did or said to
you and when what actually happened and
the story of
– you think happened going someone they
make this beautiful love and they
collapse into each other
that’s how irrational fears and limiting
beliefs are created interesting right
let’s take a look at will telling the
story of the one time a reporter in the
red carpet came up to him tried giving
him a big smooch on the cheek and who
was having none of it he slapped him
quick before anything else happened and
one thought that everybody would react
negatively to that but he was surprised
when people were actually being positive
and were were praising him for it it’s
fine just fine that remind me I was in
Russia and it was like probably a year
and a half two years ago I don’t know if
you I remember when the that like one of
the reporters tried to kiss me yeah
that’s right so I was in Russia so I get
back I’m pissed like there’s somebody
like think cuz you famous they get to do
whatever they want to do so I’m in my
room and I have ten urgent messages from
jay-z and I’m laying eggs like Jay don’t
hit you or he’s like call me now with
exclamation points I wasn’t yo like Jay
Jay don’t do that in right so I get a
knock out yo what’s up and he sounds
when did he say yo yo sup man what’s up
so y’all wolves had me he said hey I
just saw the video of you slapping to do
it Russia he’s I just want you to know
you’ll never make a better piece of
entertainment it’s the funniest thing
I’ve ever seen
is it me and B we got a show tonight and
we thinking about canceling it and just
staying in and watching you slap this
dude but it was like it was yeah you
know we talked about it after he was
like it was such a breath of fresh air
to see you just be yeah authentic right
that’s what you know that’s what you
were feeling and that was like one of
the first things and I was like cuz I’m
like it was my natural reaction but it
was
it was my space I’m from Philly like yo
but I thought that it would be negative
and everything and in this new yeah
social media world it actually the
authenticity was accepted and respected
and that was a really that was a nice
thing for me I want you to take a look
at your life how many stories are you
running in your head I learned that a
lot of overthinking was actually just me
putting fake stories onto things that
happen to me I was making up all these
complex scenarios in my head about what
they meant to say or what they could
have said or what I could have done and
it just led to a lot of stress anxiety
and overthinking once I realize these
were all just a bunch of stories running
in my head I felt almost a sense of
peace this is a powerful exercise that I
recommend you practice and become more
aware of you’ll start to discover other
areas in your life where you stress
about things that don’t even matter and
you’ll start to raise your own belief
and confidence in yourself I was just
talking to a friend of mine and we were
talking about self-esteem and we were
talking about how we tend to base our
self-esteem on what other people think
and that’s not really self-esteem
self-esteem is supposed to be how we
feel about ourselves and I was just
saying how dangerous it is to allow
other people to determine how you’re
going to feel about you and it’s kind of
like looking into a broken mirror you’re
gonna look at a broken mirror and then
change your face to try to look good in
this defiled busted broken mirror and it
just other people’s opinions there’s a
really way to determine how we feel
about ourselves and that’s all I’m gonna
say about where and there you have it
those are my three tips to not care what
other people think about you like Will
Smith to recap they were number one
practice self-amusement do or say things
that you find funny amuse
or at a minimum just make you happy tip
number two don’t be afraid to show your
flaws or insecurities don’t be someone
who always feels like they have to put
on a perfect image of themselves okay
people like connecting and talking and
building connections of other people who
they number one can relate to and number
two and they can see a little bit of
themselves and it’s better to show
people what you’re afraid of or Dunham
when you’re insecure about instead of
coming across as this macho man or this
macho woman who is not afraid of
anything
tip number three know the difference
between the story and what actually
happened I want you to know that
whenever anything important or
traumatising or kind of shocking happens
to you you’re going to want to attach a
story to that okay this is totally
normal
it’s important that you become aware to
this because you have to know that what
happened did happen okay there’s no
denying that that did happen but the
story that you’re trying to attach to it
did not happen and if you listen to that
story it’s just gonna keep building and
building and build more power and it’s
just gonna have a hold on your life and
you’re never really gonna be truly free
and liberated okay so stop the stories
live like an awesome listen this isn’t
only advice I’m giving to you I’m
actively trying to apply these tips in
my own life make sure you leave a
comment below let me know which tip was
your favorite and while you’re down
there let me know which celebrity you
want me to break down next this was
Edwin Torres from next-level confidence
and I’ll catch you next time raise your
standard Apple at the core its core
values is that we believe that people
with passion can change
not one drop of my self-worth depends on
your acceptance of me I don’t ever give
up I’d have to be dead or completely
incapacitated hey believe nation if you
want to see my all-time favorite top 10
rows a success I have a very special
secret video for you these are the
individual clips that I have personally
learned the most from and applied to my
life and my business check the link in description for details
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