whenever I want to change something
whether it’s a habit whether it’s a
thought or emotion or behavior I say I’m
going to work on this for 100 days if
you can increase the friction then
sometimes you can sit with the craving
of a bad habit and let it ride out so if
then planning will make you 60% more
likely to stick to a commitment want to
be happy build a life not just a
business what’s up beliefs nation at
seven I believe in you and this channel
is designed to be a part of your daily
success routine so today let’s live your
best belief life and learn how to get
rid of some of those bad habits of yours
also if you want to know Mel Robbins Dan
Locke and other successful entrepreneurs
have to say about building unstoppable
confidence check out my 250 for
confidence series where every day for
the next 254 days I will send you a
morning video for free to help you build
your confidence the link to join is in
the description below if you didn’t give
a what anybody else thought what’s
the thing you would love to be doing
with your life after you practice
Marshall you develop this natural self
confidence not cockiness but you develop
this natural self-confidence
[Music]
okay let’s kick it off with rule number
one take baby steps with John Assaraf
so someone’s listening right now and
they’re thinking you know there’s a lot
of things I want you know I want to get
out of this relationship or I want the
relationship I want to have a better
health I want to have more money there
may be and they’ve been saying that for
years and they feel like they’ve been
consuming all the information they need
to calves but they haven’t been able to
take action maybe because they’re why
isn’t powerful enough
what would you say should be their first
step well the first step is to take one
thing I’m gonna go back to one thing
yeah and say great let me move one thing
forward why because that just changes
the trajectory of the same pattern
repeating itself and as soon as you
interrupt a pattern and then you
repeatedly interrupt the pattern it’s
like taking a detour and as soon as you
take a detour one day you’re gonna like
okay that was that was okay but you
intended you’re tennessee’s to want to
go back to what’s comfortable but if you
take the detour two days six days seven
days we know from a neuroscience
perspective it takes about 66 days to
create a solid enough neural pattern
that it’ll go from conscious effort and
thinking about it to a non conscious
pattern that has the beginnings of
automaticity happening without your
involvement you’re just doing yeah and
so for me what I do and for myself is I
whenever I want to change something
whether it’s a habit whether it’s a
thought or emotion or behavior
I say I’m gonna work on this for 100
days not 30 days not 21 days not 66
which is right around there I say 100
days and then I focus all of our just on
that one thing for 100 days why to give
an example of something you’ve done
sugar here sugar
sure I’m a sugar beet I’m a sugar like
if you as an alcoholic I’m a sugar aha
it’s so bad so you take one thing just
one thing that you know may be a little
challenging 100 days a hundred days just
100 days so let’s say you want to drink
more water
one-hundred days a glass add a conscious
effort to one a day whatever you did
before you’ll still do but one glass a
day so you know I started that with my
assistants I want a drink
you know like four of these a day you
know like you know 32 ounces whatever
the case is and so every we got a mug
and it’s on my desk every time I walk in
and then I have some support from ER
saying hey remember to drink your water
so just so the first you know two three
weeks I feel like I’m gonna drown myself
in so much water but then it’s like okay
now I’m used to it now I’m drinking as
much water as possible because the habit
is there and one of the rules that I
love to follows the habit is more
important than the intensity at first so
don’t worry about the intensity right
develop the habit so can you take one
minute a day to focus on how you will
achieve a goal just one minute day can
you take one minute a day to focus on
your health yeah can you take one day to
retrain your brain yeah can I take one
day you know or one action a day and you
start off with something you know and
reduce it down to just a minute or two
minutes or one behavior if you can get
that behavior to be a habit it’s easy to
stack right of course it’s just like the
foundation of a building once you have
the foundation if you build it right you
stack yeah and so every good discipline
affects another and every bad discipline
affects others
rule number two increased a friction
with James clear the second option which
kind of sucks but is like to sit with
the craving long enough to like let this
wave a desire ride itself out and so you
basically just resist temptation it’s
possible it’s easier if if your hand is
forced if you use what I call a
commitment device so brief story real
quick Victor Hugo famous author who are
like Hunchback of Notre Dame and a bunch
of other things well when he got the
book deal for Hunchback of Notre Dom he
just procrastinating for like a year he
hosts a bunch of house parties has
friends over he went traveling for a
little while yeah he he got the book
deal he did nothing no work and
eventually his publisher got pissed off
they were like you know can you please
like actually work on
and so they set this ultimatum for him
and he said we’re gonna we’re gonna
cancel the book in six months if you
don’t have it done by then and so he he
got his assistant to come in put all his
clothes into a chest and they locked him
up and took him out of the house and the
only thing he was left with was like
this the shawl this like large robe so
basically he had no clothes that were
suitable for hosting guests or for
leaving the house or like going on trips
or anything else so more or less put
himself on house arrest and what ended
up happening was each time
procrastination arose he was able to
kind of sit with that feeling and let it
ride because he didn’t really have many
other options they can get back to work
on the book and it ended up working he
got the book done like two weeks early
but things like that where you can lock
in your future action and it becomes
really hard to go to your friends party
or go out to you know travel to a
different place or whatever just because
you don’t have the option if you can
increase the friction then sometimes you
can sit with the craving of a bad habit
and let it right out rule number three
use if-then planning with Mel Robbins so
if you’re trying to stop yourself from
repeating a pattern of behavior let’s
use drinking okay if you’re trying to
use it to stop yourself from drinking
and you feel yourself being drawn to go
pour the glass of wine because it’s six
o’clock right and you got home it’s time
to have that glass of wine and by the
way time of day is a huge trigger for
behaviors huge trigger so you feel
yourself being drawn toward the glass of
wine go 5 4 3 2 1 and physically move
away from it so that’s one thing that
you can do in terms of the thoughts and
we go into this in depth in the
five-second rule book there’s some
science around something called if-then
planning so if then planning will make
you 60% more likely to stick to a
commitment and what if then planning is
is it is coming up with a plan B before
the you-know-what hits the fan and so in
the case of thinking patterns that are
negative or behavior patterns like
pleasing people or silencing yourself
what I want you to do is it can be very
effective to write down all the times
where you’re typically triggered to do
that or to think that negative thing
then come up with what you’re going to
do instead ahead of time if this person
uses that tone of voice with me and
speaks in a different disrespectful way
instead of standing here and taking it
five four three two one then I’m gonna
do this and so you can and the reason
why is because once you get triggered
and the autopilot part of your brain
takes over it’s very very difficult to
actually talk yourself out of doing the
automated behavior because you’ve been
doing it so many times so we want you
the moment you get triggered to have
your go to rule number four shift your
environment with jay Shetty here are
some of my best tips on how you can
change your habits starting today
one of the first things you want to do
is see the trigger for your bad habit if
you feel that you eat too much junk food
or you’re not consuming the right things
for your diet the reason for those are
usually boredom staying in one place and
not having an active lifestyle try and
identify the trigger and start becoming
aware of why it is where it is and how
that bad habit is actually coming about
the second thing you want to do after
becoming aware of the triggers of your
habit is change your environment if you
know that when you work near the kitchen
you end up eating more then change your
work environment if you know that when
you wake up in the morning and you know
you need to exercise but never get
around to it have the yoga mat have your
weights laid out on the floor already
the night before start shifting the
environment so that you program your
brain you’re making it easier for your
mind and brain to start that activity at
the time you want you can create the
space create the environment beforehand
so that at the right time you have less
excuses up here and the third thing you
want to do is find positive substitute
for your needs
we all need things that give us energy
halfway through the day
you all need a reminder to wake up
earlier in the morning whatever you can
do to substitute positively finding a
positive alternative to the feeling that
you have is the best solution the truth
is you never change your life until you
change what you do daily and rule number
five the last one before a very special
bonus clip is work on the core of who
you are with Dan lock again how do I
stop these unhealthy habits what should
I do I want to be able to quit smoking I
want to quit drinking I want to be
healthier you see the challenge with
that mentality is you might think oh
then is that about self-discipline how
do I do that knowing that these habits
are not good for me they are not healthy
they’re not beneficial to me in a long
term but why is it so difficult to stop
wiser so difficult to quit it’s very
simple you smoke because you’re smoker
you drink coffee because you’re coffee
drinker you do drugs because you’re a
drug addict dan what do you mean by that
what I mean by that is because that’s
what you do you are who you are I’ll say
that again you are who you are
so you smoke because you’re smoker it’s
very very simple do you know people who
don’t smoke who is a nonsmoker when you
talk to a nonsmoker just like myself I
cannot even stand the cigarette smell I
would like oh my god oh it makes me
cough it makes me feel uneasy it makes
me nauseous I think it’s the smell is
disgusting
because I’m an awesome nonsmoker it’s
not like oh my god when I see that
secret oh man would love to get a puff
no I don’t even want it near me anywhere
near me why because I am a non smoker so
it’s not a struggle it is not a
challenge for me not smoke same thing
with you it’s challenging because that’s
how you see yourself so if you want to
stop any unhealthy habits in
working on the habits work on the core
work on the core of who you are when you
change the core of who you are it’s easy
to change the habits when you want to
change the habits we’re now changing the
core who you are that’s why people who
try to quit smoking they cannot they try
to stop doing drugs they cannot because
that’s how they see themselves
you cannot I’ll perform and outgrow your
self-image
it’s not about self-discipline it is
about self-image how you see yourself
you see yourself as someone who is lazy
that’s what you’re lazy you see someone
yourself as someone who is who is focus
who is who has disciplined who is
hard-working guess what your behaviors
and your habits will show if you see a
person as a person of excellence guess
what you have excellent performance it’s
no different you cannot ask Michael
Jordan to play a lousy game of
basketball because he is Michael Jordan
that’s how he sees himself but the
secret is he saw himself long as Michael
Jordan as Air Jordan way before he
actually became Michael Jordan now I’ve
got a special bonus tip with Warren
Buffett on how to conquer your fears
that I think you’re really gonna enjoy
but before that it’s time for the
three-point landing questions time to
move from just watching another video to
taking action in your life for business
and if you’re feeling bold leave your
answers in the comments below here we go
question number one what is the most
important shift that you can make to
your environment right now number two
where can you increase the friction in
your life and number three what’s the
next baby step that you need to start
taking somebody once said that the
chains of habit or too light to be felt
until they’re too heavy to be broken I
have been terrified of public speaking
I couldn’t do it and throw up and I know
if I didn’t cure it then they never
cured
and so I so I’d add in the paper for the
Dale Carnegie Wars which worked on
developing your ability to speak in
public and I went down there be thin a
good smile added the thing that they had
the puppies to you when a puppy wake I
made it to all these crazy things to get
out of ourselves and so we stood on
I hadn’t have done that my whole life
would have been different so in my
office you will not see the degree I got
from the University of Nebraska will not
say the master’s degree from Columbia
University but you’ll see the little
wart certificate I got from the Dale
if you want to learn how to develop
discipline check out the video right
next to me I think you’ll enjoy it
continue to believe and I’ll see you
there
the supporters of blown discipline
discipline discipline discipline
discipline discipline discipline discipline
whether it’s a habit whether it’s a
thought or emotion or behavior I say I’m
going to work on this for 100 days if
you can increase the friction then
sometimes you can sit with the craving
of a bad habit and let it ride out so if
then planning will make you 60% more
likely to stick to a commitment want to
be happy build a life not just a
business what’s up beliefs nation at
seven I believe in you and this channel
is designed to be a part of your daily
success routine so today let’s live your
best belief life and learn how to get
rid of some of those bad habits of yours
also if you want to know Mel Robbins Dan
Locke and other successful entrepreneurs
have to say about building unstoppable
confidence check out my 250 for
confidence series where every day for
the next 254 days I will send you a
morning video for free to help you build
your confidence the link to join is in
the description below if you didn’t give
a what anybody else thought what’s
the thing you would love to be doing
with your life after you practice
Marshall you develop this natural self
confidence not cockiness but you develop
this natural self-confidence
[Music]
okay let’s kick it off with rule number
one take baby steps with John Assaraf
so someone’s listening right now and
they’re thinking you know there’s a lot
of things I want you know I want to get
out of this relationship or I want the
relationship I want to have a better
health I want to have more money there
may be and they’ve been saying that for
years and they feel like they’ve been
consuming all the information they need
to calves but they haven’t been able to
take action maybe because they’re why
isn’t powerful enough
what would you say should be their first
step well the first step is to take one
thing I’m gonna go back to one thing
yeah and say great let me move one thing
forward why because that just changes
the trajectory of the same pattern
repeating itself and as soon as you
interrupt a pattern and then you
repeatedly interrupt the pattern it’s
like taking a detour and as soon as you
take a detour one day you’re gonna like
okay that was that was okay but you
intended you’re tennessee’s to want to
go back to what’s comfortable but if you
take the detour two days six days seven
days we know from a neuroscience
perspective it takes about 66 days to
create a solid enough neural pattern
that it’ll go from conscious effort and
thinking about it to a non conscious
pattern that has the beginnings of
automaticity happening without your
involvement you’re just doing yeah and
so for me what I do and for myself is I
whenever I want to change something
whether it’s a habit whether it’s a
thought or emotion or behavior
I say I’m gonna work on this for 100
days not 30 days not 21 days not 66
which is right around there I say 100
days and then I focus all of our just on
that one thing for 100 days why to give
an example of something you’ve done
sugar here sugar
sure I’m a sugar beet I’m a sugar like
if you as an alcoholic I’m a sugar aha
it’s so bad so you take one thing just
one thing that you know may be a little
challenging 100 days a hundred days just
100 days so let’s say you want to drink
more water
one-hundred days a glass add a conscious
effort to one a day whatever you did
before you’ll still do but one glass a
day so you know I started that with my
assistants I want a drink
you know like four of these a day you
know like you know 32 ounces whatever
the case is and so every we got a mug
and it’s on my desk every time I walk in
and then I have some support from ER
saying hey remember to drink your water
so just so the first you know two three
weeks I feel like I’m gonna drown myself
in so much water but then it’s like okay
now I’m used to it now I’m drinking as
much water as possible because the habit
is there and one of the rules that I
love to follows the habit is more
important than the intensity at first so
don’t worry about the intensity right
develop the habit so can you take one
minute a day to focus on how you will
achieve a goal just one minute day can
you take one minute a day to focus on
your health yeah can you take one day to
retrain your brain yeah can I take one
day you know or one action a day and you
start off with something you know and
reduce it down to just a minute or two
minutes or one behavior if you can get
that behavior to be a habit it’s easy to
stack right of course it’s just like the
foundation of a building once you have
the foundation if you build it right you
stack yeah and so every good discipline
affects another and every bad discipline
affects others
rule number two increased a friction
with James clear the second option which
kind of sucks but is like to sit with
the craving long enough to like let this
wave a desire ride itself out and so you
basically just resist temptation it’s
possible it’s easier if if your hand is
forced if you use what I call a
commitment device so brief story real
quick Victor Hugo famous author who are
like Hunchback of Notre Dame and a bunch
of other things well when he got the
book deal for Hunchback of Notre Dom he
just procrastinating for like a year he
hosts a bunch of house parties has
friends over he went traveling for a
little while yeah he he got the book
deal he did nothing no work and
eventually his publisher got pissed off
they were like you know can you please
like actually work on
and so they set this ultimatum for him
and he said we’re gonna we’re gonna
cancel the book in six months if you
don’t have it done by then and so he he
got his assistant to come in put all his
clothes into a chest and they locked him
up and took him out of the house and the
only thing he was left with was like
this the shawl this like large robe so
basically he had no clothes that were
suitable for hosting guests or for
leaving the house or like going on trips
or anything else so more or less put
himself on house arrest and what ended
up happening was each time
procrastination arose he was able to
kind of sit with that feeling and let it
ride because he didn’t really have many
other options they can get back to work
on the book and it ended up working he
got the book done like two weeks early
but things like that where you can lock
in your future action and it becomes
really hard to go to your friends party
or go out to you know travel to a
different place or whatever just because
you don’t have the option if you can
increase the friction then sometimes you
can sit with the craving of a bad habit
and let it right out rule number three
use if-then planning with Mel Robbins so
if you’re trying to stop yourself from
repeating a pattern of behavior let’s
use drinking okay if you’re trying to
use it to stop yourself from drinking
and you feel yourself being drawn to go
pour the glass of wine because it’s six
o’clock right and you got home it’s time
to have that glass of wine and by the
way time of day is a huge trigger for
behaviors huge trigger so you feel
yourself being drawn toward the glass of
wine go 5 4 3 2 1 and physically move
away from it so that’s one thing that
you can do in terms of the thoughts and
we go into this in depth in the
five-second rule book there’s some
science around something called if-then
planning so if then planning will make
you 60% more likely to stick to a
commitment and what if then planning is
is it is coming up with a plan B before
the you-know-what hits the fan and so in
the case of thinking patterns that are
negative or behavior patterns like
pleasing people or silencing yourself
what I want you to do is it can be very
effective to write down all the times
where you’re typically triggered to do
that or to think that negative thing
then come up with what you’re going to
do instead ahead of time if this person
uses that tone of voice with me and
speaks in a different disrespectful way
instead of standing here and taking it
five four three two one then I’m gonna
do this and so you can and the reason
why is because once you get triggered
and the autopilot part of your brain
takes over it’s very very difficult to
actually talk yourself out of doing the
automated behavior because you’ve been
doing it so many times so we want you
the moment you get triggered to have
your go to rule number four shift your
environment with jay Shetty here are
some of my best tips on how you can
change your habits starting today
one of the first things you want to do
is see the trigger for your bad habit if
you feel that you eat too much junk food
or you’re not consuming the right things
for your diet the reason for those are
usually boredom staying in one place and
not having an active lifestyle try and
identify the trigger and start becoming
aware of why it is where it is and how
that bad habit is actually coming about
the second thing you want to do after
becoming aware of the triggers of your
habit is change your environment if you
know that when you work near the kitchen
you end up eating more then change your
work environment if you know that when
you wake up in the morning and you know
you need to exercise but never get
around to it have the yoga mat have your
weights laid out on the floor already
the night before start shifting the
environment so that you program your
brain you’re making it easier for your
mind and brain to start that activity at
the time you want you can create the
space create the environment beforehand
so that at the right time you have less
excuses up here and the third thing you
want to do is find positive substitute
for your needs
we all need things that give us energy
halfway through the day
you all need a reminder to wake up
earlier in the morning whatever you can
do to substitute positively finding a
positive alternative to the feeling that
you have is the best solution the truth
is you never change your life until you
change what you do daily and rule number
five the last one before a very special
bonus clip is work on the core of who
you are with Dan lock again how do I
stop these unhealthy habits what should
I do I want to be able to quit smoking I
want to quit drinking I want to be
healthier you see the challenge with
that mentality is you might think oh
then is that about self-discipline how
do I do that knowing that these habits
are not good for me they are not healthy
they’re not beneficial to me in a long
term but why is it so difficult to stop
wiser so difficult to quit it’s very
simple you smoke because you’re smoker
you drink coffee because you’re coffee
drinker you do drugs because you’re a
drug addict dan what do you mean by that
what I mean by that is because that’s
what you do you are who you are I’ll say
that again you are who you are
so you smoke because you’re smoker it’s
very very simple do you know people who
don’t smoke who is a nonsmoker when you
talk to a nonsmoker just like myself I
cannot even stand the cigarette smell I
would like oh my god oh it makes me
cough it makes me feel uneasy it makes
me nauseous I think it’s the smell is
disgusting
because I’m an awesome nonsmoker it’s
not like oh my god when I see that
secret oh man would love to get a puff
no I don’t even want it near me anywhere
near me why because I am a non smoker so
it’s not a struggle it is not a
challenge for me not smoke same thing
with you it’s challenging because that’s
how you see yourself so if you want to
stop any unhealthy habits in
working on the habits work on the core
work on the core of who you are when you
change the core of who you are it’s easy
to change the habits when you want to
change the habits we’re now changing the
core who you are that’s why people who
try to quit smoking they cannot they try
to stop doing drugs they cannot because
that’s how they see themselves
you cannot I’ll perform and outgrow your
self-image
it’s not about self-discipline it is
about self-image how you see yourself
you see yourself as someone who is lazy
that’s what you’re lazy you see someone
yourself as someone who is who is focus
who is who has disciplined who is
hard-working guess what your behaviors
and your habits will show if you see a
person as a person of excellence guess
what you have excellent performance it’s
no different you cannot ask Michael
Jordan to play a lousy game of
basketball because he is Michael Jordan
that’s how he sees himself but the
secret is he saw himself long as Michael
Jordan as Air Jordan way before he
actually became Michael Jordan now I’ve
got a special bonus tip with Warren
Buffett on how to conquer your fears
that I think you’re really gonna enjoy
but before that it’s time for the
three-point landing questions time to
move from just watching another video to
taking action in your life for business
and if you’re feeling bold leave your
answers in the comments below here we go
question number one what is the most
important shift that you can make to
your environment right now number two
where can you increase the friction in
your life and number three what’s the
next baby step that you need to start
taking somebody once said that the
chains of habit or too light to be felt
until they’re too heavy to be broken I
have been terrified of public speaking
I couldn’t do it and throw up and I know
if I didn’t cure it then they never
cured
and so I so I’d add in the paper for the
Dale Carnegie Wars which worked on
developing your ability to speak in
public and I went down there be thin a
good smile added the thing that they had
the puppies to you when a puppy wake I
made it to all these crazy things to get
out of ourselves and so we stood on
I hadn’t have done that my whole life
would have been different so in my
office you will not see the degree I got
from the University of Nebraska will not
say the master’s degree from Columbia
University but you’ll see the little
wart certificate I got from the Dale
if you want to learn how to develop
discipline check out the video right
next to me I think you’ll enjoy it
continue to believe and I’ll see you
there
the supporters of blown discipline
discipline discipline discipline
discipline discipline discipline discipline
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