of whatever it is you want to be but go
become the best of it and see how the
world opens to if you don’t know what
you want to pursue then don’t start
pursuing something with all your might
it is very okay to be dirt poor it is
very okay to be broke what you think
about yourself is the ultimate goal it’s
the ultimate thing it’s the ultimate
reward or punishment need motivation
watch top ten with believe nation what’s
up at seven my one word is believe and I
believe in you I believe you have
Michael Jordan level talent at something
and I want you to find it embrace it and
make a difference with it so let’s get
your motivation to attend and get you
believing in you grab a snack and join
today’s lessons from a man who went from
growing up in a morbidly obese family to
being dead broke and not being able to
pay his bills to building a
billion-dollar brain and now being on a
quest to pull people out of the matrix
and unleash their true potential he’s
Tom Billiam and here’s my take and his
alright let’s kick things off with rule
number one my personal favorite
go get extraordinary so when I hear
people where their reaction is to be
about a problem like let you and I were
talking you being Hispanic is working
against you Jason you being an
african-american it’s working against
you like you’re gonna have to go up hill
but now what you’re gonna sit and
complain about it because it won’t help
you right so if you have a goal it’s
like it does suck that women have to
work harder to get to the same place
that has a white male in America that I
have to get to but if it is true if
we’re all going to accept that it’s true
we can all sit there and go we need to
focus on the system’s fair enough and
I’m glad that some people do that
the other option though is to say well I
completely control me and the one thing
I will tell any human being alive right
now
there is always room for the best and
once you’re able through your skills
that have utility to move somebody else
closer to their goal you will become a
hot commodity no matter what no matter
what okay think about the scientists
what were the scientists after World War
two right before they were scientists
for us they were Nazis but we were way
happy to let go of that because they had
crazy skills that we needed right so
really what it comes down to is what are
your skills like if you’ve got skills
can be used to build something beautiful
to do something wonderful to the world
to help people move towards their goals
that will excite the masses because they
they want that thing that you’re going
to create that it’s going to improve
people’s lives but only thing that
mattered in all of that was you got
really good at something and somewhere
along the way we lost that the punchline
is no matter what you do to the system
you you as an individual need to get
extraordinary at something and so my
encouragement to people is go get
extraordinary like don’t worry about
whether the system is broken or not we
built quest a billion dollar company in
less than five years coming out of the
Great Recession
so more what was it in the Great
Depression more millionaires were
created in the Great Depression than any
other time in history it’s like it just
comes down to somebody goes
honestly this is how I react the system
is too big and complicated I’m too
afraid to try to get caught up in fixing
that I’m too big of a chicken there I
just said it I’m too big of a chicken to
deal with that but I can deal with
myself I can go get extraordinary right
so focus on that go get extraordinary go
become the best of whatever it is you
want to be but go become the best of it
and see how the world opens to you rule
number two become a goal-oriented person
I very much used to be task oriented
I’ve lovingly said that what my parents
imbued me with was a slave mentality
keep my head down to as little work as
possible and avoid punishment at all
costs that’s how I thought about things
certainly how I thought about school
it’s how I thought about a job
it’s how I thought about most of the
relationships in my life it was about
avoiding conflict it was not about
having a strong core beliefs it was
really getting by getting through life
like trying to you know get through the
week so that you can enjoy yourself in
the weekend and love your family and I
don’t get me wrong they had really
amazing intentions and they wanted me to
enjoy my life but there were just things
that they saw is in a Leah Boulder were
you just couldn’t change them and so
that put me in just thinking about
whatever was right before me so oh I
need to get an A okay you know this is
what I’ll do to get my A and the grades
is a perfect example because the real
goal should have been learning it should
have been knowledge it should have been
me going hey the system doesn’t actually
really give me the things that I want
and so pushing back against that and
trying to figure out what I need to do
to actually educate myself but I didn’t
do that because the task before me was
get an A that’s just what you did in my
family you got good grades and so
cheating was a perfectly reasonable
solution to that now when I went to
college I realized wait a second this is
supposedly the thing that I love most I
was studying film so if I really loved
this then why would I cheat if I’m going
to try to get a career out of this again
why would I cheat and if I’m taking on
massive amounts of college debt to learn
about this why would a cheat it doesn’t
make sense and so in that I switched
from that task oriented mindset to
really thinking bigger about my goals
there were things in life that I wanted
to achieve that I wanted to accomplish
and I had to then reverse engineer what
needed to do to get there rule number
three go get lost hey Tom what’s your
best advice for someone just graduating
from college with no sense of direction
and no job go get lost go explore go do
things that interest you dive deep don’t
prematurely optimize so this is
something that I think is missing in
people’s life stay if you don’t know
what you want to pursue then don’t start
pursuing something with all your might
it is very okay to be dirt poor it is
very okay to be broke
like in that early period of your life
your early 20s man it is so okay to not
be making a lot of money as long as
you’re able to eat and you would be
startled by how little money that takes
it’s okay go out discover play bumble
around do whatever it takes to begin to
discover the things that really give you
energy that will serve you incredibly
well because feeling alive that’s the
name of the game rule number four chase
fulfillment I become an owner in the
company through sweat equity the company
is worth the height I think it was worth
valued at like twenty two million
dollars so on paper I’m a
multimillionaire my salaries higher than
it’s ever been in my life and now I’m
completely miserable and I’m like I’m
living the cliche of money can’t buy
happiness and I’m like this is a joke
like this was so predictable and so easy
to see coming how if I actually gotten
caught in this trap and I began to
realize that I wasn’t pursuing things
that gave me more energy I was pursuing
something that was taking more energy
than it was giving I wasn’t pursuing
something that I was passionate about
and what I didn’t yet understand about
money is that money is in and of itself
it’s inert right nobody save for maybe
Scrooge McDuck and possibly Warren
Buffett like would actually get off on
swimming in their own money right so
it’s not the money right when you talk
to Warren Buffett part of what drives
them is it’s a scorecard right he gets
off on the scorecard but if you don’t if
that’s not your thing and it’s not mine
so I’m building this business I’m
learning all these skills I’m coming in
I’m working my ass off I’m working seven
days a week I’m not taking
I’m damaging my relationship at home and
all for what money now the vast majority
of my wealth at the time was tied up in
the equity of the company which
basically means you have none right so
most people don’t even understand the
difference between paper money and
liquid cash paper money is not
interesting like they’ll write about it
in Forbes magazine and kids will come up
to me freaking out because they know my
net worth is crazy high and I’m like the
only thing you should care about is how
much money do I have where I can go now
manifest something in the real world
build a business buy something whatever
and that’s a totally different game so
at that moment I’m thinking this is
total misery I want to wake up every day
and enjoy my life to have more energy
being given to me than taken away and in
that moment I realized the game I’m
playing isn’t money it’s not success
it’s brain chemistry and if the game
that I’m playing is brain chemistry
which I’ll say another way deep and
lasting fulfillment the thing that as a
human makes us feel good the thing that
we’re all secret deep down no matter
what you tell people you’re chasing the
thing you’re actually chasing is
fulfillment you want to feel good about
who you are you want to feel good about
your contributions you want to feel good
about meaning and purpose in your life
so those are the things altum Utley the
people are chasing they think that money
is going to give that to them and that
they’re wrong and that’s how they keep
getting caught off guard now the reason
that money is this trap that everyone
can tell you is a trap and yet it will
still capture you is because money is
real and it’s really powerful and the
things that money lets you do in your
life is almost unimaginable until you
have money and I see now what I’m doing
finally now having real liquid assets
that are significant you can guys think
for one second right now imagine closing
your eyes and thinking about that thing
you most want the thing you want to
build it’s something beautiful it’s
something you want to leave your
humanity I would just assume it isn’t
dumb like a car right it’s really
something it’s something you want to
build and give and it’s gonna be I don’t
think in legacy but like I get the
sentiment it’s gonna be your legacy it’s
going to be
that thing that outlasts you or helps
other people or offers jobs or build
something that we all want the only
thing stopping you from doing it you’re
gonna say it’s time but it’s not time
it’s money and that’s how money gets
people because once you know what you
want to build with it then it’s really
powerful but if you’re chasing money in
and of itself you’ll burn out I promise
you won’t enjoy your life because you’re
not thinking about that end result rule
number five go all-in
is it possible to fully grow into your
potential achieve your huge goals and
continue on that journey of the mind
whilst used whilst which I respect while
still enjoying getting drunk and
partying I didn’t see that coming or are
they completely mutually exclusive so
here’s what I think about that I am a
big believer that if you’re going all
out you are grinding it out you leave it
on the field so I’m telling you right
now Monday through Friday if I am awake
I am working or working out period in
fact now these days I read while I’m
working out which I never did before we
could do a whole episode on how I’ve
made that finally work but that process
one requires that you love what you’re
doing so let me just make that
abundantly clear I love what I’m reading
about I love what we’re trying to build
all of it just amazing it gives me more
energy than it takes away now once you
have that though really wanting to
actuate your potential and going after
it every day and knowing I’m going to
bed now because I have left it all out
on the field and I’m telling you there
are times during the day where I’m like
let me just look at reddit for like five
minutes and I just it’s like for five
minutes I can’t do it it’s so embedded
in me to want to be the person that I
say out loud to actually be internally
that that’s when I go and I start
looking at Instagram replying to
comments doing research whatever so
[Music]
doing that playing that hard every day
leads me to when I want to stop and go
shake my ass even if it’s a random
Tuesday I’ll go do that because I know
how hard I’ve played every day I know
how much I’m willing to bleed for my
goals so this is now
about emotional austerity this is not
about grinding yourself into into the
dirt first of all it’s doing something
you love so that as you’re grinding and
going that hard it’s something that you
just want to do then on the other side
because you’re going that hard that you
just don’t have the guilt that most
people have when you take time off and
relax and chill so when I’m working I am
all the way in and when I’m relaxing I’m
all the way in rule number six scan the
opinions of others how receptive should
I be to the opinions of others of me
when I firmly believe I’m doing the
right thing for myself so I think it is
always good to scan the opinions of
other people even when they are hostile
even even when they are overtly meant as
an attack to really look at that and say
is there any truth in this here’s a
great news when people attack you they
almost always go for something real it
is very rare that somebody tries to
attack you for something that isn’t real
so really look at that thing and figure
out okay
is there some truth in here is there
something that I can address because if
they’re hitting you is something that’s
true and that if you fixed that you’d be
in a more powerful position than it’s
very wise to listen to the opinions of
other people having said that you need
to think more about yourself you need to
trust your vision more than you worry
about what other people think it’s gonna
sting when people don’t like what you’re
doing or don’t believe in you or
whatever but at the end of the day if
you look at it and there’s truth take
the truth make an adjustment don’t worry
about anything else it’s just that’s
gonna make you more powerful if there’s
no truth in it and it stings then just
let it go and focus on what it is you’re
trying to accomplish but at the end of
the day this is all being driven by the
goal so if something they say can help
you get the goal you’re gonna take it if
something they say hurts but can’t help
you reach your goal you’re going to
ignore it it’s that simple
rule number seven find your mission I
grew up in a morbidly obese family so
for me it was I needed to have a mission
that was so big and so compelling that
it gave me energy that I could show up
every day and fight for people that I
could think about there’s an awesome
quote often attributed to Mother Teresa
that says nobody will act for the many
but people will act for the one so if
there’s someone you can picture someone
you know someone you love like you’ll go
to battle for them so I knew I’ll show
up every day and fight for my mom and my
sister and I know that they’re gonna die
too early if we can’t figure out how to
solve this problem of making food that
people want to eat tastes good and so
that became the mission of the company
was to end metabolic disease and to do
it by making food that people can choose
based on taste and it happens to be good
for them rule number eight let go of
your past mistakes how do you completely
start over in life when your past
mistakes won’t let go of you alright
let’s be really clear you won’t let go
of your past mistakes that that is just
the gospel truth so you’ve got to work
at letting those go now the only thing
that I’ve found that works is the
following to understand that they don’t
move you towards your goals so for me
putting in not quite a bright line but
really taking the impact theory belief
system which by the way you can download
now by going to impact Theory com
signing up for our newsletter which I
kill myself to make those newsletters
amazing so go there now
and one of your incentives for doing so
is the 25 point bullet belief system
those are the 25 things you need to do
to your mind to make sure that you’re
optimized for success one of those
things is we only believe that which
moves us towards our goals now the
reason that I put that into my own lives
because I found that I would obsess over
things that had happened in the past
either something that happened to me or
something that I did and you get into
this really weird cycle that is
absolutely obsessive because of that it
becomes hardwired because of that it
becomes easier to think about because of
that you think about it more often it
begins to just occupy a lot of cycles
and crowds out your ability to get other
things done so I didn’t know how to
break out of that pattern because like
you I thought it was something that was
happening to meet rather than something
that I could control and so I had to
flip it and realize okay I’m in my life
at the absolute foundational layer of
everything that I do and believe I’m
going to make sure that it’s something
that moves me towards my goals
so if obsessing over the past moved me
towards my goals I would do it but it
doesn’t and so I don’t that is the only
thing that I found that I have a belief
that is so powerful and all-encompassing
in my life that I should do what moves
me towards my goals that anything even
something that I would otherwise be
prone to obsessively return to I use
basically techniques from cognitive
behavioral therapy also known as CBT
where I will stop myself it doesn’t mean
that I’m not having those initial
thoughts but it means that I interrupt
those initial thoughts because it’s not
moving me towards my goal I move that
aside and then I go focus on the thing
that is going to move me towards my goal
which may be an empowering thought to
reframe that negative thing is something
positive to remind myself that I’m good
I’m worthy I’m whatever I need to do in
order to get moving and get going or
just ask myself have you learned from
that mistake and if you have then go
you’ve got the lesson move forward
nothing else matters cycling through it
isn’t going to help so that is my advice
it is very doable cognitive behavioral
therapy interrupt those patterns make
them habit loop triggers for something
empowering rule number nine think about
yourself what you think about yourself
is the ultimate goal it’s the ultimate
thing it’s the ultimate reward or
punishment but what you think about
yourself is at the end of the day the
single most important thing and so
beginning to have a relationship with
yourself of sitting quietly and this may
be one of the reasons that meditating is
so important that you can actually sit
quietly think about who you are now what
you think about yourself who you want to
become what price you’re willing to pay
to get there and then actually going
down that path to become that person
that at the end of the day is the thing
that is going to bring you happiness and
fulfillment but you really have to think
about who you want to become and to not
be trapped by your past but do that put
time and energy into thinking about what
do I want to think about myself and
quite honestly what do I think about
myself right now if you steer by that it
becomes very easy to ignore other people
and rule number 10 the last one before
some very special bonus clips
in control of your life and as Bruce Lee
said if you always put limits on
everything you do physical or anything
else it will spread into your work and
into your life there are no limits there
are only plateaus and you must not stay
there
you must go beyond them even in the
statement you can see him making the
choice about what to believe by saying
that there are no limits by taking
something that other people perceive as
a limit is something that’s stopping you
and saying that’s not it’s a plateau
it’s something that I can push through
and you see what he holds himself
accountable to it’s not okay to stay at
a plateau it’s okay to have one
everybody has them they happen it’s a
natural part of the course of getting
better but it is not okay to stay there
and that is a choice that’s not
something anyone can hand you it’s
something you have to believe to the
core of your soul that it is not okay to
stay in a plateau and it’s that that’s
gonna push you through it’s that that’s
gonna make you get up and keep going but
first you have to recognize that life is
cause-and-effect you have to recognize
that that
the knock-on effect you have to
recognize that him nearly saying those
words out loud have a cause and effect
they changed the course of his life the
expectations that other people have of
him expectations that he has of himself
and because he understands that he can
control the outside world by first
controlling what’s inside by changing
his belief system to match what he wants
to accomplish he’s then able to
accomplish what he did in his life have
nothing to do with look it had
everything to do with the demands that
he made on himself it had to do with
when he got in a motorcycle accident
people told him he would never walk
again not only did he walk again all of
the major accomplishments that we think
about him being that man they all came
after they came after he was told he was
never gonna walk again after he was told
that he was never going to be able to do
martial arts but he did it he did the
grueling work of getting better he
understood cause and effect he
understood that if you chose to believe
that he could never do it that he’d
never be able to do it but that if he
chose to believe that by working out he
could get stronger and get better and
get back to it and he could and that’s
what he did
so now ask yourself is your life
dictated by luck
or cause and effect
are you in control or is it somebody
else is someone else in control or is it
you and if it’s you go build the life
that you want because there’s nothing
stopping you
but you now I’ve got three really
special Tom Beale you bonus clips around
changing your beliefs finding your true
passion and using bright lines but
before that I want to know what did you
learn from today’s video what did you
learn from Tom which rule resonated the
most with you and why leave it down the
comments below I want to hear from you
thank you guys so much for watching I
believe in you I hope you continue to
believe in yourself and whatever your
one word is much love I’ll see you soon
movies have I think in movies they’ve
always just spoken to me maybe more than
most and the movie The Matrix came out
March 31st 1999 just had its anniversary
it’s 19 year anniversary and I remember
going to a preview screening of that
movie because I’m a comic nerd and I was
at a comic convention they were handing
out tickets and when they’re walking in
to the opening scene basically and the
agents show up and the cop goes don’t
worry we can handle one little girl and
Agent Smith goes no lieutenant your men
are already dead and then they cut to
Trinity she jumps into the air freezes
in that theater that I saw that in
everyone screamed in unison and started
clapping now I had never experienced
something like that ever in a movie
before the spontaneous eruption of the
entire audience in the middle of
something that wasn’t like a scream or a
yell it was like celebratory they
couldn’t believe what they were seeing
and then ultimately as the movie plays
out it’s a movie about belief and it was
coming at a time in my life where the
only thing I believed was that I was a
talentless hack and that I had no idea
how to make my life come true so seeing
this metaphor for belief and that what
neo really has to figure out is that
he’s the one and that first for him to
finally come to believe in himself
enough that he is the one someone has to
tell him he’s not the one and so he’s
got to go on that whole journey and he’s
got to try the impossible he’s got to be
willing to face failure and the fact
that it works is because nobody was ever
before him willing to face the failure
and so because he’s willing to face the
failure and if you remember the movie he
fails he dies but it’s only in
remembering wait a second these are just
rules and I can break the rules then he
then comes back and realizes once he
understands the rules once he believes
in himself enough then he can do all
this incredible stuff and I don’t think
we actually live in the matrix and if we
do I don’t think that it really matters
but as a metaphor I think it’s the
perfect metaphor for the human
experience because what you believe
about yourself will entirely dictate
what you do with your life here is how I
actually have experienced the world so
passions are created they are not innate
it’s not something that’s born within
you
people through how I developed my
passion for film before I’ve walked
people how I developed my passion for
the body and helping people with
nutrition so I won’t belabor that point
now but just know that it is something
that you create it starts with an area
of interest you engage with that
interest it either gets more interesting
to you which I’ll call a fascination or
doesn’t if it doesn’t move on to
something else
find another area of interest engage
with it and see if it grows an interest
and the easiest way to understand that
is as you engage with that as you spend
more time with it is it giving you more
energy than it takes so if it gives you
more energy and you feel alive and you
look forward to and you want to do it
that’s a very good sign that this is
something that’s leading towards a real
fascination now in the book so good they
can’t ignore you Cal Newport really
differentiates between the classical
view of a passion which is like I was
born with it I’m on fire and it’s just
naturally amazing and what I think is
actually a passion which is the act of
gaining mastery takes a deep fascination
and turns it into a passion but I think
like love is a reciprocal relationship
and you’re not actually in love if
there’s no reciprocity I don’t think you
actually have a passion unless you’re
gaining mastery in it and you’re able to
alter the world in some way through that
whether it’s a musical creation whether
it’s becoming an incredible teacher and
you know that you’re impacting people’s
lives whatever it is your skill set
actually allows you to serve other
people and that emotional resonance of
going wow I worked really hard for this
skill set I am actually good at this
thing and being good at this thing
actually allows me to manifest that in
some way that is tangible in the real
world
Lauren Cisco Connect inbox I’ve heard
you talk about using bright lines in
your life
what are your bright lines you live by
daily how did you incorporate the lines
into your life did you just decide one
day or just do it or was there some
trial and error so first of all bright
lines are lines you just don’t cross for
whatever reason it’s something that is
that important to you that you’re not
going to cross that line so the bright
lines that I have in my life are I’ll
just go through sort of
by moment so the first one is I get out
of bed in ten minutes or less so I have
a real problem I don’t know what it is
with morning people I am NOT a morning
person I absolutely hate mornings I find
it very difficult to get out of bed
so whatever the chemical is that your
brain clears up that wakes you up mine
is really slow at clearing that so left
to my own devices I would lay in bed for
a very very very long time now it’s
fascinating is I guess technically I am
left my own devices but left of my
natural inclinations is probably a
better way to say that I would lay there
for a very long time it’s a very famous
story of mine at this point that when I
was living in London I would lay in bed
for hours hours 3-4 hours at a time
because I didn’t want to get a bed so I
had to put excuse me I can’t get rid of
this cough I put a bright line in that I
get out of bed in 10 minutes or less all
right next one I won’t say that it’s a
bright line that I go to the gym so that
would probably be a little unfair
although that’s a one of the first
things that I make sure that I do if I’m
crunched for time so I’ll drop other
things I believe it or not I’ll drop
meditation long before I would drop
working out partly because I hate it and
so I put it very high but that that
isn’t a bright line in true honest
fashion I never eat my breakfast before
7:00 a.m. that is a bright line now like
today I woke up at 3:40 in the morning
just woke up got out of bed so by 7:00 I
was hungry
but I didn’t actually end up beating
until about 8:30 so but I have a bright
line that I don’t eat under any
circumstances before 7 a.m.
I don’t eat before I feed my children
who are dogs but I don’t eat before them
that’s a big thing for me
psychologically so that’s my next one
and then the amount that I eat is also a
bright line so the amount that I eat for
an entire day is always pre-planned
ahead of time I know exactly what that’s
gonna be because if I don’t do that then
I get fat so that is another one of my
bright lines those are really my only
bright lines I have other things that
are like incredibly important although I
will say that I have a
right line around and this is sort of
hard to pin down to a time but I have a
bright line around if I’m awake Monday
through Friday if I’m awake I’m either
working or working out so those are my
bright lines there’s some other stuff
that God is more like belief system
identity stuff but those are like the
bright lines I wouldn’t say that I got
to them by trial and error I would say
that I got to them by knowing what I
need a bright line around so with food
for instance very easy for me to overeat
it’s very easy for me to slip in
calories without really paying attention
if I were to eat when I was hungry I
would basically be eating all the time
so putting in bright lines has been
something that’s been incredibly
incredibly useful for me raise your
standard Apple at the core its core
value is that that people need passion
and not one drop of most self-worth
depends on your it’s supposed to mean I
don’t ever give up I’d have to be dead
or completely incapacitated hey believe
nation if you want to see my all-time
favorite top ten rows of success I have
a very special secret video for you
these are the individual clips that I
have personally learned the most from
and applied to my life and my business
check the link the description for details