peas and finna waters diving deep once
again how to be a nice person according
to a psychologist if you’re a nice
person put your hand up right now
all hands up I don’t blame you
nobody wants to be an asshole can I get
a Hello we got a question him someone
wrote in saying they are a super super
nice person they’ve always done what
their parents and friends wanted them to
do but they forgotten what they want to
do they say they are very polite but
sometimes people mistaken that kindness
for weakness they want to know what to
do about that let me share with you what
helped me along my journey I used to be
a super nice person too until I realized
that hey what is even more important
than being nice is being authentic is
being real and that’s what becoming your
greatest version is all about now
there’s a reason why a lot of us we want
to be nice people do you remember the
cookie jar you are very young and if you
wanted that cookie you had to be very
well-behaved really well-behaved okay
then you got the cookie so we equate
being nice to getting prizes and being
bad to getting no prizes so sometimes we
are nice because we know it gets us what
we want so you have to ask yourself are
you being nice because you have an
agenda to get something or are you being
nice because it’s coming from a genuine
authentic place that’s the greatest
question to ask yourself because
goodness for wonderful people on planet
Earth can I get another hello there
there are there are problems only nice
people have what’s the first problem
they are expert people pleasers to be a
nice person you have to become a
professional people pleaser what happens
when you are fulfilling everyone else’s
demands and needs sometimes you neglect
your inner needs and therefore you’ve
also become resentful to people who are
asking you all of these demand for
questions and things to do in your life
get out of my face
I realize that you can’t please everyone
and along my journey I know people
resonate with me some people don’t but
I’m not here for you to be happy
all the time I’m here to express myself
authentically at the same time I’m
pretty reasonable but a lot of us we go
out of our way to make sure everybody is
satisfied everybody is super happy but
in the process we move away from our
intent isset II the second problem is
you’re afraid to say no to be a nice
person never say no just say yes because
the more yeses you say the more nice you
are nobody likes to sometimes break it
to you and along my journey sometimes
people would tell me the truth and I
thought gosh they were horrible but
actually they were very very nice people
you see sometimes we confuse what is
nice and what is
what is good and what is bad when we
lose that we realize it’s not a matter
of black or white here it’s a matter of
authentic or inauthentic and sometimes
when you can be very authentic when
someone says hey do you want to go out
uh yes
really you want to say no I’m not sure
I’ll think about it later
be patient hey you don’t want to do that
though because you’re a nice person nice
people never say no find your expression
find your unique voice and realize that
you have nothing to lose because your
real friends always going to be there if
you say no it’s not going to be the end
of the world right the third problem is
that you care way too much what other
people think about you so to be a nice
person take everything to heart remind
yourself everything is personal because
many nice people
carry the world on their shoulders the
opinions of other people on their
shoulders once again we want to please
people right I realize doing that was a
recipe for disaster why because it
leaves you feeling tired I’m not here to
make everyone love me I’m only here to
really share my authentic self with the
world and at the same time connect with
great people and I respect them for who
they are it’s all about being you not
necessarily being nice a secret because
if you care to the point where you’re
afraid
you see many of us are nice because we
have a fear of being alone a lot of us
we’re nice because we have a fear of not
fitting in a lot of us we’re nice
because we’re told that is more socially
acceptable so you have these stories of
good girl gone bad good guy gone bad and
we think we’re shocked we disgusted what
happened to them
life is what happened to them
experiences is what happened to them
because this whole image we’ve created
at them in our minds is now being
shattered the fourth problem is that we
never want to let people down gosh that
must be torture we never want to offend
people so I call it tiptoeing we’re
tiptoeing around all the time and when
you do that yes your feet start to her
but more so you don’t walk boldly so
I’ve seen in becoming my greatest
version you’ve got a walk boldly you’ve
got to realize that hey we’re not living
in a perfect world we’re living in a
perfect earth you see the fifth problem
is that many nice people just want to be
righteous all the time mister righteous
missus righteous you see whenever you
see yourself as righteous you’ve now
given yourself a label you’ve put
yourself in a box which is very
difficult to get out of I spoke about
clear in your mind how the first thing I
why do I say that because if I say I am
righteous now I’m terrified to be
anything other than what I think is
righteous so therefore you always have
to be a nice person do you know how much
pressure that creates on you that’s why
you have a lot of so-called goodie
goodies they say actually I don’t want
to do this because all the people who
are having fun that crazy I want to do
that and now they become liberated
because now they’re stepping more into
their authenticity they’re doing what
their heart really wants to do as
opposed to what other people want them
to do whenever we’re so righteous all
the time
holier-than-thou then people begin to
expect certain things from us certain
ways of behavior family friends the
next-door neighbor and the cat down the
road but can you be wild and free for me
I’ve seen that’s where in a liberation
takes place I say what is more important
than being nice is being authentic Hey
and that’s nice anyway that’s good
enough most of the times hey we are
friendly people as human beings thank
goodness for all the amazing people out
there have a wonderful day we are here
infinite waters diving deep once again stay well stay healthy peace
again how to be a nice person according
to a psychologist if you’re a nice
person put your hand up right now
all hands up I don’t blame you
nobody wants to be an asshole can I get
a Hello we got a question him someone
wrote in saying they are a super super
nice person they’ve always done what
their parents and friends wanted them to
do but they forgotten what they want to
do they say they are very polite but
sometimes people mistaken that kindness
for weakness they want to know what to
do about that let me share with you what
helped me along my journey I used to be
a super nice person too until I realized
that hey what is even more important
than being nice is being authentic is
being real and that’s what becoming your
greatest version is all about now
there’s a reason why a lot of us we want
to be nice people do you remember the
cookie jar you are very young and if you
wanted that cookie you had to be very
well-behaved really well-behaved okay
then you got the cookie so we equate
being nice to getting prizes and being
bad to getting no prizes so sometimes we
are nice because we know it gets us what
we want so you have to ask yourself are
you being nice because you have an
agenda to get something or are you being
nice because it’s coming from a genuine
authentic place that’s the greatest
question to ask yourself because
goodness for wonderful people on planet
Earth can I get another hello there
there are there are problems only nice
people have what’s the first problem
they are expert people pleasers to be a
nice person you have to become a
professional people pleaser what happens
when you are fulfilling everyone else’s
demands and needs sometimes you neglect
your inner needs and therefore you’ve
also become resentful to people who are
asking you all of these demand for
questions and things to do in your life
get out of my face
I realize that you can’t please everyone
and along my journey I know people
resonate with me some people don’t but
I’m not here for you to be happy
all the time I’m here to express myself
authentically at the same time I’m
pretty reasonable but a lot of us we go
out of our way to make sure everybody is
satisfied everybody is super happy but
in the process we move away from our
intent isset II the second problem is
you’re afraid to say no to be a nice
person never say no just say yes because
the more yeses you say the more nice you
are nobody likes to sometimes break it
to you and along my journey sometimes
people would tell me the truth and I
thought gosh they were horrible but
actually they were very very nice people
you see sometimes we confuse what is
nice and what is
what is good and what is bad when we
lose that we realize it’s not a matter
of black or white here it’s a matter of
authentic or inauthentic and sometimes
when you can be very authentic when
someone says hey do you want to go out
uh yes
really you want to say no I’m not sure
I’ll think about it later
be patient hey you don’t want to do that
though because you’re a nice person nice
people never say no find your expression
find your unique voice and realize that
you have nothing to lose because your
real friends always going to be there if
you say no it’s not going to be the end
of the world right the third problem is
that you care way too much what other
people think about you so to be a nice
person take everything to heart remind
yourself everything is personal because
many nice people
carry the world on their shoulders the
opinions of other people on their
shoulders once again we want to please
people right I realize doing that was a
recipe for disaster why because it
leaves you feeling tired I’m not here to
make everyone love me I’m only here to
really share my authentic self with the
world and at the same time connect with
great people and I respect them for who
they are it’s all about being you not
necessarily being nice a secret because
if you care to the point where you’re
afraid
you see many of us are nice because we
have a fear of being alone a lot of us
we’re nice because we have a fear of not
fitting in a lot of us we’re nice
because we’re told that is more socially
acceptable so you have these stories of
good girl gone bad good guy gone bad and
we think we’re shocked we disgusted what
happened to them
life is what happened to them
experiences is what happened to them
because this whole image we’ve created
at them in our minds is now being
shattered the fourth problem is that we
never want to let people down gosh that
must be torture we never want to offend
people so I call it tiptoeing we’re
tiptoeing around all the time and when
you do that yes your feet start to her
but more so you don’t walk boldly so
I’ve seen in becoming my greatest
version you’ve got a walk boldly you’ve
got to realize that hey we’re not living
in a perfect world we’re living in a
perfect earth you see the fifth problem
is that many nice people just want to be
righteous all the time mister righteous
missus righteous you see whenever you
see yourself as righteous you’ve now
given yourself a label you’ve put
yourself in a box which is very
difficult to get out of I spoke about
clear in your mind how the first thing I
why do I say that because if I say I am
righteous now I’m terrified to be
anything other than what I think is
righteous so therefore you always have
to be a nice person do you know how much
pressure that creates on you that’s why
you have a lot of so-called goodie
goodies they say actually I don’t want
to do this because all the people who
are having fun that crazy I want to do
that and now they become liberated
because now they’re stepping more into
their authenticity they’re doing what
their heart really wants to do as
opposed to what other people want them
to do whenever we’re so righteous all
the time
holier-than-thou then people begin to
expect certain things from us certain
ways of behavior family friends the
next-door neighbor and the cat down the
road but can you be wild and free for me
I’ve seen that’s where in a liberation
takes place I say what is more important
than being nice is being authentic Hey
and that’s nice anyway that’s good
enough most of the times hey we are
friendly people as human beings thank
goodness for all the amazing people out
there have a wonderful day we are here
infinite waters diving deep once again stay well stay healthy peace
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