
my name is dr. Andrea DiNardo I’m a
college professor and a school
psychologist I have a particular
interest in helping students thrive
under pressure I help them focus on
what’s right when everything feels like
it’s going wrong I have this unique
ability when I meet someone it’s like
they shine and I see their strengths but
so often they don’t see them so that’s
where I come in I help them realize that
we’re like palm trees and that we’re
strengthened by storms that our roots
become stronger in hurricanes and you
might not realize that but resilience is
a Latin term for leap back and we only
need to look to nature for an example of
how bending and flexing in stress will
make all the difference in terms of
whether we snap like oak trees or bent
like palm trees and that’s the paradox
of strength we can’t get rid of
challenge we don’t want to get wit rid
of adversity and we certainly don’t want
to get rid of stress but what we need is
a map for navigating from stress
distress because life is a journey
whether it be a 24 hour journey or a
hundred years we’re always moving in and
out of stress and we’re looking for
markers along the way sometimes I’m that
marker that helps my students thrive
under pressure and sometimes you’re the
marker for your brother or sister either
way
this room is filled with role models and
we’ve all been through the same stresses
and adversity by just another name
challenge
speaking of challenge what makes the
difference between thrivers and non
thrivers is how they perceive challenge
put your hand up if you’ve experienced a
challenge already today
most excellent because this talk is all
about you and I’m going to help show you
how challenge is your opportunity so
you’re driving down the highway of life
and you have an idea where you’re going
on the 401 and then you hit a sign that
says wrong way that wrong way could be
that relationship that just ended that
fairly mark on an exam or even more
unfortunate some kind of health scare no
matter what in that challenge buried
deep in that challenge is some kind of
lesson for you the kind of lesson that
once you’ve learned it you’ll take a
different Road instead of 401 maybe
you’ll take Highway three whatever it is
so for example if the challenge is a
mark on an exam maybe a series of mark
so you don’t do well the lesson might be
that this program is not for you or when
you start to get a little more honest
with yourself maybe you just didn’t
study for those tests either way you
might learn about perseverance
determination and my biggest strength is
hope belief optimism that no matter what
I do
somehow I’ll make it through because
this journey isn’t just one day and it
might be a four-year degree in
collaborative nursing or a degree in
biology or media or whatever it is it’s
not just one day it’s long and if you
want to jump out if you want to leap out
of your comfort zone you better get
comfortable and if you’re anything like
me when I get home at the end of the day
I put my play clothes on I don’t study
in a tuxedo I get relaxed or maybe you
need to gear up for that fight because
it is that big whatever it is surround
yourself with like-minded people that
support you that might need to carry you
through some of those challenges and
you’ll realize it’s an opportunity worth
fighting for and you’re not alone you’re
definitely not alone the next thing is
control and if you’re anything like me I
like to be in charge but we’re rarely in
charge
and what makes the difference between a
thriver and another thriver
is this balance between holding on and
letting go but hand up if you had a
parking issue since you started at the
University of Windsor anybody you might
have shared that with somebody take the
bus walk to school share ride how long
are you going to go on about the fact
that you have no control over the
parking issue and save that energy for
something else you can’t control the
parking but you certainly can control
how you arrive what we need at that
point what I need at this point is a bit
of breathing space because we think when
we hit the no parking zone
the class that we don’t like the fact
that we can’t find a mate that we need
to dive deeper into the problem but what
we need to do is we need to take some
breathing space and it’s physiological
because our brain when it’s faced with
any kind of threat and that’s why we
want to reduce the threat it goes into
the animal zone our amygdala and it
prepares for fight-or-flight and then it
signals the endocrine system bring me
more adrenaline but it’s just a text but
you don’t realize it it’s just a phone
call you don’t realize that it’s just a
server that doesn’t have the sandwich
that you don’t want but you don’t
realize it because when your amygdala
hijack zone you do things that you’re
not proud of because your body perceives
it as a threat and this is why breathing
space is so important it’s the one thing
you have control of in times of stress I
advise my students in between questions
take a long deep breath I’ve yet to meet
100% of my students finished an exam at
the two-hour mark most of them are at
the hour and 15-minute mark stand in the
hallway before you take your TED talk
take a deep breath and what happens is
your body is telling your mind that
you’re safe and when it’s safe then it
goes from the base
of your brain which is your limbic
system in your Magdala back up to your
prefrontal cortex and oh my god
I’m I’m Stein and this is what happens
the next day when you look back and you
reread that email you’re look at your
marks again you look at anything that
you find distressing you wonder what was
a big deal at the time your animal brain
was saying fight flight or freeze and
this is another important component of
control we want to conserve our energy
for what counts we want to manage our
energy not our time because often we
don’t have control over our time and one
simple way you can do it back to the
parking and selling you tell me telling
your friend for the fifth time the tenth
time the twelfth time that there’s no
parking on campus you save that energy
and you use it for what matters most
your relationships time in the classroom
and I have to practice what I preach and
I said to my husband two months ago
after I was invited to give this TED
talk if I complain once just once
because of all the extra work on top of
everything else I do I owe you five
bucks five bucks if you complain a lot
that can really add up I’m happy to
share I haven’t paid them a penny
because I realize I enjoy money more
than I enjoy complaining so be
accountable for your energy use it for
solutions instead of problems take
responsibility for your life and that’s
what control is about see the first
challenge is about opportunity control
is about how you use your influence and
your final one is really about today
it’s about committing to something so
much bigger than yourself so much bigger
than yourself and so that when you start
to experience the stressors instead of
looking down on the obvious because I
guarantee 90% of your stressors your
daily hassles are all repeat you look up
to something bigger and I’ll give you a
research study that shows that when you
look at commitment which is purpose and
something bigger than yourself that you
aren’t less affected by the stress
they did research with 6000 University
of Toronto first-year economics students
and when they were interested in
comparing the thrivers and I love it
what they call the divers and looking at
non-academic measures of success and
non-academic measures the success is one
of the first things teachers and
professors look for in the classroom
you just know on the first day was going
to make it apart from everything else
and what they found is when they
described the reason as to why they were
getting an economics degree at
University of Toronto the divers talked
about a very immediate gratification
rewards about the money about the cars
about the the job they were going to get
how much they were going to make whereas
the thrivers focused on something bigger
than themselves their culture their
family the community giving back making
their parents proud so when they
experienced the stress that all students
experience they would just say it’s just
part of the walk it’s part of the
journey and every day all they needed to
do was to look up to whatever their
North Star was and for me so deep in my
heart I’ve been working with students
for 20 years now my students are my
reason and every day that I walk into
the classroom I make such a point of
being a part of their future I have the
opportunity to work with collaborative
nursing program and it is a tough
program and they don’t realize it but
they do now I take them through the
three C’s of thriving under pressure in
the first 10 minutes of every class and
so when I teach them I teach them with
purpose I know I have an opportunity to
safe every patient they’re gonna save I
know I have an opportunity to insulate
them against stress I have an
opportunity to help them be successful
in their homes and in their families and
so when I teach I don’t just teach one
student 10 students I teach the future
of Canada and that’s my North Star and
that’s my commitment because I know
inside each and every one of my students
inside of each and every one of you
there’s a diamond waiting to be
discovered and it’s not about adding
things it
about taking things away because it’s
always been there my commitment to you
and my students is to take everything
away that does not shine bright and when
you’re lost because I might be in five
minutes and you might be in ten minutes
along the journey because stress happens
it’s part of life
we’ve got to look back to the three C’s
we have to find control when there is
none by taking a long deep breath we
have to realize it is a long journey I
have like ten pairs of running shoes so
I have to find comfort in the discomfort
as you do too and then finally I have to
I knew have to and we all have to look
up to the stars instead of looking down
because the answer is right in front of
you and up top together we will thrive
under pressure thank you
[Applause]
college professor and a school
psychologist I have a particular
interest in helping students thrive
under pressure I help them focus on
what’s right when everything feels like
it’s going wrong I have this unique
ability when I meet someone it’s like
they shine and I see their strengths but
so often they don’t see them so that’s
where I come in I help them realize that
we’re like palm trees and that we’re
strengthened by storms that our roots
become stronger in hurricanes and you
might not realize that but resilience is
a Latin term for leap back and we only
need to look to nature for an example of
how bending and flexing in stress will
make all the difference in terms of
whether we snap like oak trees or bent
like palm trees and that’s the paradox
of strength we can’t get rid of
challenge we don’t want to get wit rid
of adversity and we certainly don’t want
to get rid of stress but what we need is
a map for navigating from stress
distress because life is a journey
whether it be a 24 hour journey or a
hundred years we’re always moving in and
out of stress and we’re looking for
markers along the way sometimes I’m that
marker that helps my students thrive
under pressure and sometimes you’re the
marker for your brother or sister either
way
this room is filled with role models and
we’ve all been through the same stresses
and adversity by just another name
challenge
speaking of challenge what makes the
difference between thrivers and non
thrivers is how they perceive challenge
put your hand up if you’ve experienced a
challenge already today
most excellent because this talk is all
about you and I’m going to help show you
how challenge is your opportunity so
you’re driving down the highway of life
and you have an idea where you’re going
on the 401 and then you hit a sign that
says wrong way that wrong way could be
that relationship that just ended that
fairly mark on an exam or even more
unfortunate some kind of health scare no
matter what in that challenge buried
deep in that challenge is some kind of
lesson for you the kind of lesson that
once you’ve learned it you’ll take a
different Road instead of 401 maybe
you’ll take Highway three whatever it is
so for example if the challenge is a
mark on an exam maybe a series of mark
so you don’t do well the lesson might be
that this program is not for you or when
you start to get a little more honest
with yourself maybe you just didn’t
study for those tests either way you
might learn about perseverance
determination and my biggest strength is
hope belief optimism that no matter what
I do
somehow I’ll make it through because
this journey isn’t just one day and it
might be a four-year degree in
collaborative nursing or a degree in
biology or media or whatever it is it’s
not just one day it’s long and if you
want to jump out if you want to leap out
of your comfort zone you better get
comfortable and if you’re anything like
me when I get home at the end of the day
I put my play clothes on I don’t study
in a tuxedo I get relaxed or maybe you
need to gear up for that fight because
it is that big whatever it is surround
yourself with like-minded people that
support you that might need to carry you
through some of those challenges and
you’ll realize it’s an opportunity worth
fighting for and you’re not alone you’re
definitely not alone the next thing is
control and if you’re anything like me I
like to be in charge but we’re rarely in
charge
and what makes the difference between a
thriver and another thriver
is this balance between holding on and
letting go but hand up if you had a
parking issue since you started at the
University of Windsor anybody you might
have shared that with somebody take the
bus walk to school share ride how long
are you going to go on about the fact
that you have no control over the
parking issue and save that energy for
something else you can’t control the
parking but you certainly can control
how you arrive what we need at that
point what I need at this point is a bit
of breathing space because we think when
we hit the no parking zone
the class that we don’t like the fact
that we can’t find a mate that we need
to dive deeper into the problem but what
we need to do is we need to take some
breathing space and it’s physiological
because our brain when it’s faced with
any kind of threat and that’s why we
want to reduce the threat it goes into
the animal zone our amygdala and it
prepares for fight-or-flight and then it
signals the endocrine system bring me
more adrenaline but it’s just a text but
you don’t realize it it’s just a phone
call you don’t realize that it’s just a
server that doesn’t have the sandwich
that you don’t want but you don’t
realize it because when your amygdala
hijack zone you do things that you’re
not proud of because your body perceives
it as a threat and this is why breathing
space is so important it’s the one thing
you have control of in times of stress I
advise my students in between questions
take a long deep breath I’ve yet to meet
100% of my students finished an exam at
the two-hour mark most of them are at
the hour and 15-minute mark stand in the
hallway before you take your TED talk
take a deep breath and what happens is
your body is telling your mind that
you’re safe and when it’s safe then it
goes from the base
of your brain which is your limbic
system in your Magdala back up to your
prefrontal cortex and oh my god
I’m I’m Stein and this is what happens
the next day when you look back and you
reread that email you’re look at your
marks again you look at anything that
you find distressing you wonder what was
a big deal at the time your animal brain
was saying fight flight or freeze and
this is another important component of
control we want to conserve our energy
for what counts we want to manage our
energy not our time because often we
don’t have control over our time and one
simple way you can do it back to the
parking and selling you tell me telling
your friend for the fifth time the tenth
time the twelfth time that there’s no
parking on campus you save that energy
and you use it for what matters most
your relationships time in the classroom
and I have to practice what I preach and
I said to my husband two months ago
after I was invited to give this TED
talk if I complain once just once
because of all the extra work on top of
everything else I do I owe you five
bucks five bucks if you complain a lot
that can really add up I’m happy to
share I haven’t paid them a penny
because I realize I enjoy money more
than I enjoy complaining so be
accountable for your energy use it for
solutions instead of problems take
responsibility for your life and that’s
what control is about see the first
challenge is about opportunity control
is about how you use your influence and
your final one is really about today
it’s about committing to something so
much bigger than yourself so much bigger
than yourself and so that when you start
to experience the stressors instead of
looking down on the obvious because I
guarantee 90% of your stressors your
daily hassles are all repeat you look up
to something bigger and I’ll give you a
research study that shows that when you
look at commitment which is purpose and
something bigger than yourself that you
aren’t less affected by the stress
they did research with 6000 University
of Toronto first-year economics students
and when they were interested in
comparing the thrivers and I love it
what they call the divers and looking at
non-academic measures of success and
non-academic measures the success is one
of the first things teachers and
professors look for in the classroom
you just know on the first day was going
to make it apart from everything else
and what they found is when they
described the reason as to why they were
getting an economics degree at
University of Toronto the divers talked
about a very immediate gratification
rewards about the money about the cars
about the the job they were going to get
how much they were going to make whereas
the thrivers focused on something bigger
than themselves their culture their
family the community giving back making
their parents proud so when they
experienced the stress that all students
experience they would just say it’s just
part of the walk it’s part of the
journey and every day all they needed to
do was to look up to whatever their
North Star was and for me so deep in my
heart I’ve been working with students
for 20 years now my students are my
reason and every day that I walk into
the classroom I make such a point of
being a part of their future I have the
opportunity to work with collaborative
nursing program and it is a tough
program and they don’t realize it but
they do now I take them through the
three C’s of thriving under pressure in
the first 10 minutes of every class and
so when I teach them I teach them with
purpose I know I have an opportunity to
safe every patient they’re gonna save I
know I have an opportunity to insulate
them against stress I have an
opportunity to help them be successful
in their homes and in their families and
so when I teach I don’t just teach one
student 10 students I teach the future
of Canada and that’s my North Star and
that’s my commitment because I know
inside each and every one of my students
inside of each and every one of you
there’s a diamond waiting to be
discovered and it’s not about adding
things it
about taking things away because it’s
always been there my commitment to you
and my students is to take everything
away that does not shine bright and when
you’re lost because I might be in five
minutes and you might be in ten minutes
along the journey because stress happens
it’s part of life
we’ve got to look back to the three C’s
we have to find control when there is
none by taking a long deep breath we
have to realize it is a long journey I
have like ten pairs of running shoes so
I have to find comfort in the discomfort
as you do too and then finally I have to
I knew have to and we all have to look
up to the stars instead of looking down
because the answer is right in front of
you and up top together we will thrive
under pressure thank you
[Applause]
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