[Applause]
that’s me when I was 14 when I was 14 I
had a really big crush on this guy like
a massive crush he was like my best
friend he was a rebel and a rule-breaker
and I wouldn’t shut up about him yeah my
crush was Jesus Christ our Lord
III really loved him like hashtag JC as
well sit
hashtag gotta love a beard hashtag hot
prophet every Sunday I would go to
church and I would learn about this
amazing guy and how I could be more like
him how to live a full and meaningful
life and I loved church
I loved church I loved this place that
was full of people that that cared about
me that that were nice and kind of
supportive these people that supported
me who understood me
who lived a life like me we had shared
values they they loved me even when I
was annoying and I loved them even when
they were annoying Church allowed me to
be a part of something bigger than
myself to be part of a community jesus
loves me this I know for the Bible tells
me so and I read it every day or at
least I try to but some of its pretty
heavy going but then when I was about 17
I stopped sort of feeling it with Jesus
you know like suddenly we weren’t
getting on so well anymore like whenever
I pray it felt like no one was really
there we weren’t really talking as much
and then suddenly I started to question
what I believed all my life suddenly the
thing that I believed to be a hundred
percent true wasn’t such a sure thing
and the doubts got bigger and the gap
got wider and soon I felt like I
couldn’t really go to church anymore
because I didn’t really believe in God
or really understand what God was and so
I stopped reading the Bible and I
No if Jesus loved me because I didn’t
know if Jesus was real and so I left my
church and I left my happy enclaves and
I stopped singing the praises of the
Lord and I was sad and I was lonely I
tried to find another church over the
next couple of years different churches
hoping that Jesus maybe had just escaped
me in that one building but as I was
there i sat at the back feeling like a
fraud
the words when I tried to speak the
Lord’s Prayer wouldn’t come out of my
mouth and when I took communion I just
didn’t really want that free wine and as
a British person you know it’s over if
you don’t want free booze
it was difficult I tried to find a space
but they didn’t seem to be a space for
people who didn’t believe in God but did
want to work in the community did want
to live a full and happy life did want
to be a part of something bigger than
themselves
I tried atheist meetups but a lot of
them seemed to be about campaigning
against religion and finding ways to
mock religious people and having been
knocked a lot when I was religious oh
here comes Mary Magdalene again yeah and
also not being quite sure where I felt
with the whole god thing it wasn’t
really a space for me why isn’t there a
soft church for people who do not
believe in God I lamented and then I
went to university and then I went to
start working and then I stopped
celebrating life and I just started
getting on with it fast forward 13 years
and I’m now a full-time comedian and
improviser it’s 2012 and I’m driving
down the m4 on my way to a comedy gig
and in the passenger seat of my car is
fellow comedian Sanderson Jones
Sanderson is like a big beardy sunshine
and he really really looked like someone
that I couldn’t quite figure out who
but then I realized it was Barry Gibb I
started telling Sanderson about my
wedding I’d recently got married and my
mum was really keen on us having a
church wedding because although not
exclusively for this reason she wanted
to and I quote wear a big hat my husband
and I wanted a more secular arrangement
so we were trying to find a way that we
could balance tradition and ritual but
also without the religious bits
we’d been to quite a few non-religious
weddings but they’ve been quite stark
sort of so ripped out of ritual that it
was less an important milestone in your
life more a witnessing of a pen
scratching on paper so we got married in
Wilton’s old-time Music Hall which is a
building in East London that is steeped
in history my friends improvised a
choral piece as I walk down the aisle
arm in arm with my dad we shared our
vows in front of friends and family and
instead of a hymn we sang when I’m 64
and everybody sang along it felt
traditional but modern new but old
secular but rich in ritual and my mum
got to wear her hat Sanderson was very
excited about this and he said he had
the same feeling about Carol concerts
how much he loved them but as a
committed atheist he couldn’t get along
with the central story but what he could
get along with was a celebration of
family a time for thankfulness and
reflecting on a year that has passed and
then we don’t really know how to fit
went but one of us said to each other
I’ve always wondered if you could do
church without the God bit and the other
one said so have I and so we decided to
give it a go as we drove up to the
commedia comedy club in bath we decided
to attempt to create church without God
how hard could it be the answer is
really freaking hard yeah especially
when you’re two comedians who do not
know what they are doing it turns out it
takes a lot of time and energy and
effort to even begin to dissect what
humans need and what we can learn from
what has gone before and so we decided
to go with what we did
so we combined our comedy knowledge with
my church knowledge and we created an
order of service or setlist if you will
instead of hymns we had pop songs
instead of a sermon we had a we had a
speaker instead of a reading we had a
poem and instead of prayer we decided to
have a silent moment of reflection we
decided to call it Sunday assembly and
together we came up with a motto live
better help often or wonder more that is
look to your insides look at the needs
around you be inspired by the world we
found a venue a deconsecrated Church in
North London seemed like a appropriate
place to have it I was a bit worried it
was a bit big but Sanderson reassured me
that we’d definitely be able to fill it
we booked a speaker we found a band we
sent out a press release
suddenly Sanderson was a bit nervous
that maybe we couldn’t fill it so I
reassured him that we definitely could
we alternated between the doubter and
the encourage ur on the 3rd of January
2013 we had our first Sunday assembly
and over 200 people turned up it was
amazing we sang our we sang Bon Jovi and
Queen we our speaker spoke about how
important the stories are to humans and
loads of people stayed behind after to
drink tea and also to offer their help
we’ve hit on something something that
rang true for a lot of people of no
fixed belief it went viral before we’d
even closed the doors the stories went
around the internet and we were dubbed
the atheist Church we started receiving
emails from people all over the world as
well some telling us we were going to
hell but most of them telling us that
this was exactly what they’ve been
looking for for their entire lives what
we’ve hit upon was a space that was
non-religious not anti religious
according to a recent study by the
National Center for Social Research over
50 percent of the UK now identify as
non-religious and according to Pew
Research about a fifth of Americans also
fall into this category and so what
we’ve done unknowingly was created a
space for these
people sunday assembly turns five years
old in January and we now boast a global
global network of around 70 Sunday
assemblies across the world from LA to
Edinburgh from Manchester to London from
Utrecht to Canberra was a strange
reference you’re right these people meet
over 5000 people meet every month in the
name of non religious community it spin
in a map journey but we’ve had highs and
lows and everything in between but we’re
not the only people doing this Sunday
Assembly isn’t the only way of creating
a non-religious congregation there’s
lots of people as we discovered on our
journey doing this around the world
people places like Oasis in Houston
which is a secular congregation very
similar to Sunday assembly the Harvard
Divinity School now hosts a humanist hub
which is led by Greg Epstein where they
among other things lead young people
from the Boston area in a sort of mix
between a Bar Mitzvah and a Sunday
school but without the religious bits
Antipa Kula is an atheist minister who
works with new unity which is a church
in North London where the congregation a
lot of them don’t believe in God but
they do believe in good Kaspar – Kyle oh
and we had oh sorry we’ve had a
protester I forgot some wrench for that
this is our protester just one because
obviously when you think about it
there’s not really anything to protest
and you can’t have been that angry
because he lets Anderson have his
picture taken with him yes so Casper –
Kyle and Angie Thurston say in their
paper how we gather the lack of deep
community is indeed keenly felt suicide
is the third leading cause of death
among youth rates of isolation
loneliness and depression continue to
rise as traditional religion struggles
to attract young people Millennials are
looking elsewhere with increasing
urgency and in some cases they’re
creating what they don’t find we have
countless testimonials of people who
have come to Sunday assembly and said
that without it they wouldn’t have
space to grow I’ve seen people with
crippling anxiety go from hiding at the
back of the hall to addressing a four
hundred strong crowd I’ve talked to
people who had to leave their family
home because they dared to question the
belief system that they were brought up
in who came to Sunday assembly and found
solace there because we told them not
whether there was a god or not but that
they were a valuable person that they
had something to contribute
we have couples who come who are both of
a different faith who find that Sunday
assembly as a space that they can both
enjoy because the sunday assembly
experience sits alongside their faith
rather than forcing them to renounce it
I’ve met people so lonely that they
considered ending their own life but
they found Sunday assembly and they
found community they found purpose they
found a space in a 2012 study cocksure
and Rockets demonstrated a link between
belongingness and depression where
belongingness was shown to have strong
additive links to depressive symptoms in
other words if you feel like you belong
somewhere you feel less sad if everyone
who felt like they had nowhere to go
found that they did have somewhere to go
somewhere like a Sunday assembly a place
that allowed them to be a part of
something something bigger than
themselves but encouraged them to live
better help often and wonder more that
could it be anything other than a good
thing could it I’m glad I had that crush
on Jesus hashtag nice now because it
allowed me to enjoy community to
experience the good that can come from
it but also the loneliness that comes
from not having it from losing it and it
was that experience that led me to
realize we need to create alternative
spaces so that people don’t have to
experience that loneliness or can at
least have a respite from it we need to
create spaces new spaces in between
spaces there is a space for us we just
have to build it thank you
you
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