[Applause]
[Music]
[Applause]
[Music]
I’m John that’s me in the headdress I’ve
learned a few headdresses in my life I
was once a chief executive officer and a
founder of a publicly traded company in
Detroit Michigan work very hard
privilege power a lush life livin in
posh Grosse Pointe pouf one day gone
failure stirring in to avoid seeing the
shambles of invincibility looking at a
punctured self grandiosity what did I do
it’s time to jump on a motorcycle try to
figure things on out it’s a habit that I
have to this day in July of 1999 I had
another headdress removed a failed
marriage decided to motorcycle across
the United States and just outside of
Crested Butte Colorado I walked into a
fly fishing resort introduced myself to
a woman she said I’m feeling a Tanner
from Papua New Guinea go Papa what if
you want to go for a motorcycle ride
only if it’s a Harley of course I had a
Harley in 18 years later now my wife
it’s been one extreme ride what I want
to share with you over the next few
minutes is a segment of my journey into
vulnerability and I’m going to take four
extreme examples and remote Papua New
Guinea and discuss vulnerability at its
extreme where you may get wounded and
then you you weigh out whether it’s
worth the risk with on certain rewards
now Papua New Guinea is located just
north of Australia
besides the California cannibalism
the
Denarius east in 1963 our home was built
over a river surrounded by three
mountain fronts no electricity we had no
satellite phone no running water and
that we were out there but surrounded
what Jurassic valleys filled with
begonias impatience orchids nine-inch
winged butterflies believe it or not and
of course the bird of paradise and every
single evening
Fiona and I would sit on that screen
porch and hundreds of fireflies would
come out and congregate and not be
sippin out of a tin cup with maybe
whiskey in it she’d be sipping a glass
of wine and it’s a beautiful setting and
I want you to come in just for the next
few minutes and enjoy these tales from
Papua New Guinea with me I want to
introduce chief Stafford to you first
Fiona and I were going in and out of the
outer islands of Papua New Guinea up
until mid 2005 then we decided it was
time to go into the remote interior of
Papua New Guinea and we wanted to go up
to the mana godless play a toll to view
the farmers coffee farmers burning their
coffee beans and protests against
middlemen cheaters and politicians that
were put in the benefits in their
pockets and not the farmers chief
Stafford wanted to meet me was 50 men in
a pavilion sat down the first question
he asked me why are you here one of the
first times in my life I responded I do
knew not why I don’t know why I’m here
but I do know that I want to be here and
that split second the the lesson of
humility struck me in a very distinct
way that I did not try to overpower over
credential overstate myself but just
move into a place to know that I did not
have to know and that was a big act of
honor
for me I think within that split-second
my own egocentricity somewhere just
shrank just a little and this humility
up the little and it was enough for a
touching point with this wiry old chief
where we struck a deal a fair deal where
he convinced me to come back from
America with my business skills and he
would supply coffee beans to our company
to build a coffee company at the end of
that meeting he came on up and he shook
my hand and called me tall but a big
white man and we became respectful
friends now I’d like you to join me in
the wedding and table awanee
and these two men right here were there
to POLST to make sure that I was not
going to run away from my own wedding
and in fact it was a thousand years
ceremony and you couldn’t blame me after
two marriages that I wanted to run away
that particular morning what they did is
they took me down to a river and this is
going back a thousand years right now in
terms of a ceremony and they started a
scrub and wash and feather and bead me I
couldn’t stop laughs and they’re
laughing at me
and it continued for about an hour and a
half when that was done it was time to
go down into the village of Taba Lani
fiona was brought out of a hut just look
gorgeous the three pigs are right there
and within a split second I traded the
the three pigs for my wife and were
husband and wife right there
that simple that quick I always thought
that was a bargain I’m not sure to this
day that Fiona feels the same way but in
a split second father Daniel in Anakin
robes comes on out under a tin roof in
States ladies and gentlemen it was not
long ago that we would not be marrying
Johnny Fiona we would be eating them
that’s a fact
[Applause]
[Music]
now that’s the village idiot big-time
CEO right there the vulnerability the
sand foolishness surprise me with the in
that Mele right there a control freak
was out of control if i permitted myself
to be out of control i moved into the
present and connected one human being to
another one emotion to another
foolishness to foolishness and it
permitted me to make contact human
contact my big lesson right here is that
emotional empathy does break down
barriers and as a result myself trusts
increased now I want to talk to you
about the the pig at Kiara a messenger
was sent on over to my house to inform
me that I was in to be honored with the
pig and I’d be the first white person
ever to step in this village pig is a
pretty big deal two hundred and fifty US
dollars that’s about a year’s worth of
income to one of those villagers but
more than that we were occurred four to
five years of drive in this coffee
certified organic rainforest alliance
into the world market
Nestle’s buying up Whole Foods buying it
but the money was in their pockets and
they were buying rice flour paying for
school fees and putting roofing iron on
the tops of their home to keep out the
rain oh hey is it true James first white
people in this village I come here as a
friend
it’s that thing open
yes a beautiful beautiful word on the
way over there that day I bought soiled
on my pants on three different occasions
three men with machetes step right
outside of the rain forest and so white
man you go back we move forward because
we had more machetes than they did soon
after that young woman would would jump
out of the rain forest to grab Fiona’s
hair to touch blonde hair they’ve never
seen blonde here before or look at her
blue eyes and pale skin I had the urge
right there to saw on my pants a couple
times right after that men jumped out
and started throw Spears at my feet
Fiona of course her posture throughout
that afternoon darling the closer the
Spears the more you’re welcome she was
fearless we finally moved into the
village itself I’m surrounded by ancient
faces of the clan chiefs they present me
with the pig and we had a feast the
vulnerability the sand for me was a deep
one right here and it had to do with
worthiness now on a side comment you you
can soil your pants or have the feeling
of doing that and I believed that that
was not really a sign of weakness I
believe it was an act of vulnerability
and most CEOs of a coach believe that as
well but more important was a gift that
was given to me for a conditioned mind
for me to be that open to go that fire
in my life to have that pig as a reward
worthiness and legitimacy right into my
heart now that’s a headdress that’s
there forever never go away now I like
to share with you five years ago today
August 16 2012 I’m in the city of pop
and data and things aren’t going well
there was a fear that was percolating
within me I wasn’t Spears wasn’t
machetes I couldn’t put my arms around
it
but I felt threatened and so did Fiona
we pieced together that our own
vulnerability was actually creating
jealousy in vengeance from the same
middleman and politicians we encroached
on their power the first time in seven
years I permitted a firearm
we hired out two policemen and an m16 to
follow us in a vehicle right outside of
pop and dad up five men launched on out
with what we thought were Spurs were m1
rifles from World War two and started to
fire if you wanna screech that bullet
went right behind us but both the fuel
drums it’s over and we looked at one
another the other vehicle came on up
policemen with an m16 shot one of the
assassins they dragged his body in the
kunai grass within eight weeks I’m back
in Grosse Pointe Michigan I’m looking at
a wall not to see Fiona nor her
daughters for thirteen months the
company a total boss and I went into a
pit and abyss crowd my way out of it put
some meaning into a book rolled a book
it was it was effective therapy for me
the fear the lesson if you’re right on
here my arms are on that one you know
it’s it’s not as clear as the other
lessons it’s a powerful conditioner but
I had one of two decisions to make one
choice was to become invulnerable and to
close myself down and become mistrustful
or to remain vulnerable and pry myself
open to get on that highway and move
forward and I chose the second one and I
believe my heart today is better off
forward the reflections on vulnerability
it takes a lot of courage or more
unlikely you will be wounded it’s a wolf
oil act I believe it’s important to
permit yourself to use your
vulnerability attempts as the catalyst
for future growth
include them don’t exclude them is it
worth it you’re going to have to find
that out for me it was but I do believe
in the attempt
mother earth earth kind humankind will
be enriched I think all of us would be
better off forward and thank you for
joining me and this campfire and
listening with vulnerability thank you
very much
[Applause]
you
[Music]
[Applause]
[Music]
I’m John that’s me in the headdress I’ve
learned a few headdresses in my life I
was once a chief executive officer and a
founder of a publicly traded company in
Detroit Michigan work very hard
privilege power a lush life livin in
posh Grosse Pointe pouf one day gone
failure stirring in to avoid seeing the
shambles of invincibility looking at a
punctured self grandiosity what did I do
it’s time to jump on a motorcycle try to
figure things on out it’s a habit that I
have to this day in July of 1999 I had
another headdress removed a failed
marriage decided to motorcycle across
the United States and just outside of
Crested Butte Colorado I walked into a
fly fishing resort introduced myself to
a woman she said I’m feeling a Tanner
from Papua New Guinea go Papa what if
you want to go for a motorcycle ride
only if it’s a Harley of course I had a
Harley in 18 years later now my wife
it’s been one extreme ride what I want
to share with you over the next few
minutes is a segment of my journey into
vulnerability and I’m going to take four
extreme examples and remote Papua New
Guinea and discuss vulnerability at its
extreme where you may get wounded and
then you you weigh out whether it’s
worth the risk with on certain rewards
now Papua New Guinea is located just
north of Australia
besides the California cannibalism
the
Denarius east in 1963 our home was built
over a river surrounded by three
mountain fronts no electricity we had no
satellite phone no running water and
that we were out there but surrounded
what Jurassic valleys filled with
begonias impatience orchids nine-inch
winged butterflies believe it or not and
of course the bird of paradise and every
single evening
Fiona and I would sit on that screen
porch and hundreds of fireflies would
come out and congregate and not be
sippin out of a tin cup with maybe
whiskey in it she’d be sipping a glass
of wine and it’s a beautiful setting and
I want you to come in just for the next
few minutes and enjoy these tales from
Papua New Guinea with me I want to
introduce chief Stafford to you first
Fiona and I were going in and out of the
outer islands of Papua New Guinea up
until mid 2005 then we decided it was
time to go into the remote interior of
Papua New Guinea and we wanted to go up
to the mana godless play a toll to view
the farmers coffee farmers burning their
coffee beans and protests against
middlemen cheaters and politicians that
were put in the benefits in their
pockets and not the farmers chief
Stafford wanted to meet me was 50 men in
a pavilion sat down the first question
he asked me why are you here one of the
first times in my life I responded I do
knew not why I don’t know why I’m here
but I do know that I want to be here and
that split second the the lesson of
humility struck me in a very distinct
way that I did not try to overpower over
credential overstate myself but just
move into a place to know that I did not
have to know and that was a big act of
honor
for me I think within that split-second
my own egocentricity somewhere just
shrank just a little and this humility
up the little and it was enough for a
touching point with this wiry old chief
where we struck a deal a fair deal where
he convinced me to come back from
America with my business skills and he
would supply coffee beans to our company
to build a coffee company at the end of
that meeting he came on up and he shook
my hand and called me tall but a big
white man and we became respectful
friends now I’d like you to join me in
the wedding and table awanee
and these two men right here were there
to POLST to make sure that I was not
going to run away from my own wedding
and in fact it was a thousand years
ceremony and you couldn’t blame me after
two marriages that I wanted to run away
that particular morning what they did is
they took me down to a river and this is
going back a thousand years right now in
terms of a ceremony and they started a
scrub and wash and feather and bead me I
couldn’t stop laughs and they’re
laughing at me
and it continued for about an hour and a
half when that was done it was time to
go down into the village of Taba Lani
fiona was brought out of a hut just look
gorgeous the three pigs are right there
and within a split second I traded the
the three pigs for my wife and were
husband and wife right there
that simple that quick I always thought
that was a bargain I’m not sure to this
day that Fiona feels the same way but in
a split second father Daniel in Anakin
robes comes on out under a tin roof in
States ladies and gentlemen it was not
long ago that we would not be marrying
Johnny Fiona we would be eating them
that’s a fact
[Applause]
[Music]
now that’s the village idiot big-time
CEO right there the vulnerability the
sand foolishness surprise me with the in
that Mele right there a control freak
was out of control if i permitted myself
to be out of control i moved into the
present and connected one human being to
another one emotion to another
foolishness to foolishness and it
permitted me to make contact human
contact my big lesson right here is that
emotional empathy does break down
barriers and as a result myself trusts
increased now I want to talk to you
about the the pig at Kiara a messenger
was sent on over to my house to inform
me that I was in to be honored with the
pig and I’d be the first white person
ever to step in this village pig is a
pretty big deal two hundred and fifty US
dollars that’s about a year’s worth of
income to one of those villagers but
more than that we were occurred four to
five years of drive in this coffee
certified organic rainforest alliance
into the world market
Nestle’s buying up Whole Foods buying it
but the money was in their pockets and
they were buying rice flour paying for
school fees and putting roofing iron on
the tops of their home to keep out the
rain oh hey is it true James first white
people in this village I come here as a
friend
it’s that thing open
yes a beautiful beautiful word on the
way over there that day I bought soiled
on my pants on three different occasions
three men with machetes step right
outside of the rain forest and so white
man you go back we move forward because
we had more machetes than they did soon
after that young woman would would jump
out of the rain forest to grab Fiona’s
hair to touch blonde hair they’ve never
seen blonde here before or look at her
blue eyes and pale skin I had the urge
right there to saw on my pants a couple
times right after that men jumped out
and started throw Spears at my feet
Fiona of course her posture throughout
that afternoon darling the closer the
Spears the more you’re welcome she was
fearless we finally moved into the
village itself I’m surrounded by ancient
faces of the clan chiefs they present me
with the pig and we had a feast the
vulnerability the sand for me was a deep
one right here and it had to do with
worthiness now on a side comment you you
can soil your pants or have the feeling
of doing that and I believed that that
was not really a sign of weakness I
believe it was an act of vulnerability
and most CEOs of a coach believe that as
well but more important was a gift that
was given to me for a conditioned mind
for me to be that open to go that fire
in my life to have that pig as a reward
worthiness and legitimacy right into my
heart now that’s a headdress that’s
there forever never go away now I like
to share with you five years ago today
August 16 2012 I’m in the city of pop
and data and things aren’t going well
there was a fear that was percolating
within me I wasn’t Spears wasn’t
machetes I couldn’t put my arms around
it
but I felt threatened and so did Fiona
we pieced together that our own
vulnerability was actually creating
jealousy in vengeance from the same
middleman and politicians we encroached
on their power the first time in seven
years I permitted a firearm
we hired out two policemen and an m16 to
follow us in a vehicle right outside of
pop and dad up five men launched on out
with what we thought were Spurs were m1
rifles from World War two and started to
fire if you wanna screech that bullet
went right behind us but both the fuel
drums it’s over and we looked at one
another the other vehicle came on up
policemen with an m16 shot one of the
assassins they dragged his body in the
kunai grass within eight weeks I’m back
in Grosse Pointe Michigan I’m looking at
a wall not to see Fiona nor her
daughters for thirteen months the
company a total boss and I went into a
pit and abyss crowd my way out of it put
some meaning into a book rolled a book
it was it was effective therapy for me
the fear the lesson if you’re right on
here my arms are on that one you know
it’s it’s not as clear as the other
lessons it’s a powerful conditioner but
I had one of two decisions to make one
choice was to become invulnerable and to
close myself down and become mistrustful
or to remain vulnerable and pry myself
open to get on that highway and move
forward and I chose the second one and I
believe my heart today is better off
forward the reflections on vulnerability
it takes a lot of courage or more
unlikely you will be wounded it’s a wolf
oil act I believe it’s important to
permit yourself to use your
vulnerability attempts as the catalyst
for future growth
include them don’t exclude them is it
worth it you’re going to have to find
that out for me it was but I do believe
in the attempt
mother earth earth kind humankind will
be enriched I think all of us would be
better off forward and thank you for
joining me and this campfire and
listening with vulnerability thank you
very much
[Applause]
you
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