two people who are friends and whose
friendship has just kind of made the
news recently that all they up with his
dog Max has lived in a homeless context
and I see that because there’s no one
description of that for maybe seven
eight nine years struggled with a huge
number of tough realities that have made
life very difficult for him and his
friend Leslie Baldwin I knew lately 20
years ago when and another life I did
his mother’s funeral but their friends
even though that she her world is the
world of finance and standard life where
she works and family and all that kind
of thing and children as you can see
which seems a long way from Donald’s
world but actually their friendship is
really quite inspirational and we know
about it because of an incident happened
recently that showed the depth of their
friendship so data was beaten up on the
streets if you are on the streets you
are times more likely to
experience violence and so he was beaten
up and stabbed as was his dog max no
Leslie got to hear about it because she
spent time getting to know dad as he was
sitting outside her place of work she
took tamely talked him to understand him
and the relationship had grown so when
she held a bit less of it her friend
suffering in this way she did something
about it
she had a cloud funding appeal for him
and it was quite extraordinary
within a week really sudden they raised
seventeen and a half thousand pounds for
Daryl to really try and make a
difference in his time of cases and in
fact another lating agency came and
offered donald a house too and so he was
able to move in to a flat and when
Leslie was asked about the incident by
the local paper this is what she said
I’m friends with a homeless man Daryl
and his dog Max become victims of some
thugs recently who’ve been
darrel and stab little max thankfully
Max’s okie and make a full recovery I am
friends with a homeless man she stood
beside her friend in his time of need
even though many of others may have
chosen to have some kind of distance the
journey that are going to take now that
the money has been raised and the host
is there it’s still a country one this
isn’t a Hollywood film there’s still big
challenges to happen and say really
until I worked with a part of that
journey no much smarter than booth as we
explore where we can go next to with
this opportunity when the opportunity’s
been created because of the relationship
that was there a relationship that meant
the hope and transformation and a tough
time could possibly happen we believe in
civilians that the journey from
exclusion to inclusion as an inner
journey a journey of a soul but it is a
journey built on relationships for that
is what most feeds the soul so we
redistribute surplus supermarket food we
feed four and a half thousand people in
partnership with 100 organizations every
week he’s in shifting 30 tons of food
that would otherwise go to landfill we
distribute it using a variety of ways
including vans and I went out in the van
one day where a guy called Arthur alpha
has they also had a tough life he an
addict for 20 odd years of alcohol
really a tough life in so many ways and
things were really not good for him he
managed to end up at our place and he’s
been sober now for a four years
and he told me that he had kept his
tenancy for four years that’s the
longest he’d kept a tenancy in his life
and he’s in his 40s or 50s now and he’s
back talking to his daughter to
extraordinary Qing and relationships Ben
bill but he told me the reason that that
was able to happen was because by
driving the van and taken the food to
other places where foot will in need he
had moved from being someone who has
helped to someone who to become a hell
in a new form of relationships he was
able to see himself dramatically
differently and build halt and
transformation where it didn’t seem
possible many years ago I took a group
of young people to I owners a little
island off the west coast of Scotland it
is seen as the Keadle of Christianity in
Scotland all this isn’t a story about
religion itself but it is about the
community that is there so we took the
folk there for a week then for a week
then they were coming for Leith so you
know apart from maybe London the Porter
Leath occasionally you know see say done
islands and stuff what things what
they’ve done much off so the end of the
week I said if he had a good tamer this
I was clear he was clean I said what was
good about it and one of the young woman
Michelle said to me she said see here
you can wear cheap training shoes and
people still like it
there was a pro profound self discovery
in new relationships that mattered so
much to her and still in touch with
Michelle 20 odd years later and she
still remembers the difference that
means to her and her ability to achieve
and flourish the things that she wanted
to do an extraordinary change in new
relationships about who she was as a
person oh I didn’t know that was going
to happen when I took that group there
you couldn’t get a plan for the cheap
training shoes bet we just had to go to
John Hinkley a space with something
different could happen and a new
possibility was discovered so the one at
the end there as a friend of mine Sheena
Wasserman she’s our lecturer and there
was a lecturer across and Glen Glasgow
if she heard that one of her local
school Springboro Academy was having
real challenges the journey of the young
folk they had nobody going on to higher
education at all and very few going on
to further education but there’s no
money real challenge what do they do so
they created a mentoring scheme and
Sheena became one of the mentors and she
told me that what she did was spend an
hour a week with a young one as she went
through inter from fourth year into 50th
and the possibility of doing exams that
might get her on further on
and I didn’t do very much I just
listened she said but she told me a
story where she was just the young
moments about to go into exam so M
Sheena went when I once said all right
you know and we agreed and she said to
you
you’ll be fraid of this you have clever
and the young lass busting it Till’s
she’s got she’s got exam what I’ve done
what I’ve done we wouldn’t say no it’s
okay it’s just nobody’s ever told me
that before it’s past exam she’s at
University in that relationship and that
common and that expression of
affirmation and love enormous
possibilities became real so we guess
some of you recognize one of the people
in that picture so we do cooking classes
we do cooking classes because if you
give somebody a house that’s fine but if
they can’t cook for themselves they’re
not going to keep the house and of
course we find that the best bet of the
cooking classes is the meal at the end
she and the meal one guy came and
started the classes know he had done
some terrible things in his life things
you really don’t want to know about and
he knew when he came out having spent an
awful long time in prison that people
would see him through the paradigm of
his past and he believed that he would
never get to anywhere else because of
that stigma that you carry because of
his own actions so he’s doing the
cooking classes and he liked them so
much that he did them again and they did
them again and at the end of them if you
take the photograph of the guy at the
end of them and the beginning you de
thought there were two completely
different human beings because this
whole persona was changed by cooking
classes master why what happened there
what what was good about this
he said that when we had the meal at the
end which was great and I could sit with
people and eat they would eat food that
I had made fridge that I had made they
took enough plates they received and ate
it that was the point of change in the
simplest of human acts in a relationship
built around food shield we know that
many of the people we travel with unsay
lead Ian’s carry what are called adverse
childhood experiences a combination of
abuse and neglect and household
dysfunction and there’s a lot of
evidence that says that if you have four
or more of these you will end up with
African physical or mental health
challenges or behavior patterns that are
inherently discussive and you end up in
in tough realities so what work we done
to evidence the connection between those
things but interestingly there are some
people who have those four plus a
scissors that called and they get
through and a university in Wales that
our study recently about why that was
the case what was the difference there
and sure there was lots of stuff a bit
services are owned and access the money
and all those kinds of things maybe
education and opportunities and stuff
and all that’s important but actually
the common factor was this it was an
always available adult somebody they
could identify with who would journey
with him no matter where else was
happening the chaos in their life and it
could be a granny on an auntie of
somebody’s big brother or a sports court
should a teacher or whatever it just
somebody who would just be there not
apply a plan or tell them they had to do
this or that or anything else just be
there always available and that was the
thing that could take them through that
place of chaos and destruction of
themselves hi brands chief medical
officer of Scotland and Theresa Marie
has done some extraordinary work on why
Scotland is that when the sickest
nations in in Europe in some parts of
Glasgow have a life expectancy amongst
men of lower than the Gaza Strip
we have horrendous issues with obesity
with violence with alcoholism it’s not
just because of the deep-fried Mars bar
diet
there is something profound going on in
Scotland now Holly understands that a
lot of it is to do with the stress and
insecurity but what he says is the
solutions lie in building up families
that most profound of relationship
whatever form that family takes whatever
sheep the 21st family said to me family
is that is the place where we will
change will happen that is the place
the British cohort study distract
everybody born in Britain between the
5th and 12th of April 1970 it feels to
me a bit late kind of legal stalking but
there you go
it’s they’ve done some a profound work
and just see in the journey those folk
have taken so when there were 34 the
folk in that study when asked do they
feel success was deliberately feeling
questioned and self defining success so
do you feel successful and of those who
said they felt successful the common
factor was not the structure of the
family that they came from or that they
were n the marital status siblings
wealth education jobs there’s any of
those things that might appear to be the
definitions of success in today’s world
the single common factor amongst those
aged 34 who felt successful was the
level of self confidence age 10 their
inner well-being was the key factor on
the journey now we know that our inner
well-being is not something that’s just
ourselves but relates to a capacity to
be in relationship with others John
McMurray professional moral philosophy
in NY 1950s had a definition of a person
and our person identity in three parts
there’s our individuality who we are the
person we define is different from
others but he said that’s not really who
we are
nor is the person we are and all the
social engagement you have the people
you meet colleagues at work and folk at
the bus stop or whatever it is our
passion is found in our relationships
with others relationships where we are
vulnerable and we journey in crisis and
we laugh and have tears and of
opportunities and celebrations all the
deeply human feelings of things that
fill the soul and our capacity to be who
he might be lies in our capacity
to have those relationships for we are
fundamentally connected as beings human
life is inherently a common life but he
wasn’t the first to say that Francis
Hutcheson who’s also professor of moral
philosophy in Glasgow in the 18th
century a huge influence on the Scottish
enlightenment said that’s well I’m not
going to read you to this because this
is 18th century English grammar and it’s
kind of doesn’t he make a lot of sense
into you have to think about it what he
really was seen was when we’re thinking
about the decisions we take in all of
life the key factor is doing the thing
that will bring the greatest happiness
to the greatest number so our moral
frame of human beings is a connected
frame a relationship be stream and he
went on to influence people at David
Schuman and Smith who talked much more
about not just the act that brings
happiness to others but the sense that
we get from seeing the happiness and
others because a consequence of our
actions our decisions our choices our
sense of self lying in a connected is
with others but even they weren’t there
for us to see that we back through all
of our ways we’ve created our belief
systems whether it’s religion or
philosophy whenever it is we see that
Golden Rule love one another love the
stranger love your enemy do the right
thing do unto others you have them do to
you
the golden rule Humanity is a connected
ruler relationship rule it’s a
relationship about others as well as
self and in that relationship we find
out who it is we actually are but what
we know for those who are in tough
realities for whom making those
relationships is difficult because of
what’s happened them that that takes
time when I first left school I worked
as a youth worker in in Rock Hill in
Glasgow know it’s kind of tough place
they used to say that even the Alsatians
used to run a bit in threes you know it
was that kind of place you know so we
guy that we worked with for a while and
heat our friend asleep under early as a
child
really
tough tough life went from it six months
and we got him a house and I thought
sorted she meets Lita was my door he had
as they used to say in those days when
you used to put money in the meter
yourself rather than cards wait I said
he’d screwed his own meat on you know
he’d stolen from himself
but kicked over house and I said what
we’re going to do what we’re gonna do
and the social worker we’ve been working
with said look they said it’s taken him
twenty-one years to get into this
situation it might take him 21 years to
get out of it and we just have to be
there and that’s what we understand in
Sadie needs that the journey takes time
and we need to be able to respond to be
ready when the changes happen even
though they might be really small
changes give some examples so a young
woman Carrie who is a peer what’ll she
have self as in recovery and she works
and journeys with folk who are in the
same situation and she was done in with
this guy who had was so isolated as a
consequence of his addiction they just
didn’t leave the house and he never drew
the Cotten’s he was just completely on
his own
she kept growing and kept growing and
kept on him because she knew what it was
like to be what he was she was able to
build a relationship that others perhaps
had not been in a position to do that’s
just who she is enemy one day she turned
up at the house and before she went in
the door she knew that change had
happened he Dalton the Cotton’s he’d put
light on his life in a way he hadn’t
done for years and because she’d been in
a journey with him and understood him
she knew the significance of that act
and was able to help him celebrate it
and go to the next stage in the next
stage it’s a tiny tiny act but an
extraordinary profound change for him we
have a prevailing service with all the
people because all the people are
actually significantly more likely to
lose on houses these days because they
become socially isolated we went with a
guy called Kane who who lost his way a
number of years ago and really again had
struggled to get out and to do things
and June of course a conversation with
his befriender who said to him so what
would you like to do I tell you what
could we do
and he said he said you know it’s a long
time since I put up Christmas
decorations do it do it when we came
back a couple of days later and there
and that has got to such a point what he
know is on our website telling people
about the change that happens as a
result of just joining with somebody but
a friend I needed to know the
significance of the tiniest act in
relationship so that change was possible
brilliant works with one of her with
folk who are living on the streets she’s
one of our outreach workers and she says
that she can tell when change is
happening when the guy she’s made
appointments to meet stop just not
turning up because life’s too chaotic
and start bringing it up and saying look
I can ECE just know cuz something’s
happened but can I see you tomorrow
they moved from letting chaos run their
lives to try and adjust in the smallest
of ways meaningless taking some control
over their own life now none of those
would be targets or KPIs in a funding
application you know the number of times
the columns shall be opened you know but
those are the really profoundly human
transfer meeting transformational times
that we know will make the difference
trusted relationships are the place
where we will build society trust a
delicious at the persistent and patient
and plan free no we’ve probably got more
elections our own just now than we
really need but there’s an opportunity
for us to begin to change the narrative
about what it is we will do we need to
do to build a genuinely inclusive
society so fort can go on that journey
from exclusion to inclusion the journey
of the soul so sure we need to make sure
that folk of the education opportunities
they have and the houses they need than
the money they need and the jobs and all
those gains are things but what we
really can do as whittles say to
politicians and I speak as an ex
politician
ask them not how many of this and how
many of that and how much he had and how
much they’re but how are you going to
help all the services that we have all
the people we have who are in a position
to journey with walk who are excluded
how we going to help them build trusted
relationships how many trusted
relationships are you going to enable
and if we are prepared to do that and
talk differently about the way we want
to see the journey from exclusion to
inclusion in the dance of this world
we’ll see and discover opportunities and
have a chance to flourish and we too
will flourish as well because this is a
shared journey and together we will
build a society where we are all loved
loveable and feel that our love can be
received thank you [Applause]