thing that I remember wanting to do in
life I remember it 14 15 years old
watching some classic films not well
spending months and months watching all
the great classics all the great
performers of the past and being so
incredibly inspired by them and saying
to myself one day I want to come close
to doing something that good so that I
think that that thirst or that drive to
just achieve what I believe is something
as good as you know those heroes that I
have is what continues to make me want
to want to do this boom wasn’t built in
a day we all know that everyone’s hears
that but Rome also didn’t fall apart
overnight either it took hundreds of
years for Rome to reach its peak but it
also took time hundreds of years for
Rome to decay and fall apart and that is
representative of life because you don’t
achieve worthwhile goals quickly or
easily they take time they take struggle
they take relentless pursuit day in and
but also things don’t usually fall apart
quickly either at least at first it’s
it’s a slow process a little slip here a
little setback over there a little
wearing down of discipline and will over
time that’s the thing success and
failure are generally slow processes
either slowly building things up or
gradually tearing them down and that’s
you have to watch you have to watch
because those seconds they turn into
minutes then minutes turn into hours and
hours turn into days and days turn in to
years and so that second that second
that just went by that counted and so
did that second and so did that one
and in those precious seconds
you’re either building or you’re
decaying you were either gaining ground
or you were losing ground in that second
so
make every second count I’m not mr.
mentor I’m not the one who says let’s
sit down tell me how it’s going oh I’m
gonna tell you exactly how I am get off
your ass and get out there and sell
something that’s right I mean I’ve never
been the okay I need a mentor you know a
lot of people look for mentors thinking
they’re gonna tell me the shortcut mark
will you be my mentor you know the way
and they think I’m gonna go convey some
magics here’s the dust go go go
it doesn’t work that way I still grind
I love the grind if you’re competing on
one of my businesses I’m gonna kick your
ass cuz I’m gonna I’ll grind you right
that’s what being an entrepreneur that
an entrepreneur is you’ve got to get out
there and do the work so when it comes
to how do you learn right because that’s
the question how do I learn this stuff
and everybody everybody has got to go
through that process right I read our
I’m in the tech business I’m in media
business the entertainment business I’ve
got to try to prepare myself for all the
Shark Tank businesses I read three hours
plus a day right what everybody else is
getting a suntan or even when I’m
getting a suntan I’ve got I’m online or
I’ve got books I’m reading all I can
I’m inspired YouTube we’re gonna make
this the episode thing you’ll get
whatever you want Tyler but this is the
core of it you just saw it on stage
that’s just you just saw it on stage
dying on your sword is better than dying
on someone else’s so many of you are
doing things making decisions and
navigating your lives based on somebody
else’s thesis you’re doing it because
you think it’s the right thing because
your dad’s telling you it’s the right
thing you’re doing what you’re doing
right now cuz you’re pandering to your
boss even though you don’t believe in it
or try so hard in our lives to fit in we
try to fit into certain groups certain
frats certain sororities you know
amongst certain friends yet the people
we idolize our most are the ones that
stand out but when you’re prepared there
is no fear there is no fear of failure
okay because even if you’ve walked out
of something and you feel like you’ve
failed at it your preparation is so
strong that you’re gonna take that
failure and turn it into the outcome you
desire and most people stop at failure
okay we’ve all failed at things I’m
gonna continue to fail at stuff like
it’s the most powerful tool you can use
but it all depends on how you use it you
know we talk about it in relentless okay
a scalpel okay in the hands of an
individual it can do unbelievable damage
in the hands of a professional of a
doctor it saves lives so it’s the same
thing with failure it’s how you use it
it’s that drive inside of you okay it’s
what we talk about the dark side the
dark side is filled with failure but
it’s the fuel that burns you like
something that’s never burned inside you
before this is how it’s gonna play out
you are doing things right now yesterday
you made a decision that you don’t
believe in but you’re smart you did it
because you know how your company’s
scores here’s the problem with
disruption and innovation right now
you’re being rewarded for being a yes
person and in 36 months you’re gonna be
fired for being a yes person
and you’re doing it because you just
need the security of your job I’m
telling you right now if you’re watching
this vlog and you’ve got like that means
you have a certain DNA please I implore
you please die on your sword not
somebody else’s if you’re gonna lose
it’s much more fun to lose based on what
you thought do you mean do you know how
many of you are gonna lose on somebody
else’s thesis it’s gonna kill at you
it’s gonna eat at you it’s going to be
the worst feeling so please pause this
video right now and ask yourself am i
doing much because of me then you’re
good whether you’re winning or losing or
am i doing it because somebody else is
telling me it’s the right way or I’m
subconsciously pandering to please
somebody or something because I need the
short-term stability figured out the gal
you know it and I know it that takes
years to become a great chef what you
need to do is establish confidence in
yourself cooking is an amazing journey
and don’t think you can learn it within
three or four years it’s like studying
medicine there’s over a 10 to 15 year
period I’m 42 years of age and I’m still
learning new exciting things now that I
bring back to the fold but more
importantly provisionally
I didn’t think French was important at
school and I kicked myself now because I
went live in France for three years and
became bilingual but I wish I’d studied
harder with a second language on my belt
that gives you a different culture gives
you a completely different level of
confidence learning French French
cuisine mannerism and cooking in a very
robust tenacious way so yeah vision and
open-mindedness and we never cut corners
and then you start cutting corners in
food timeout there’s no worse job to
have than to cut corners in food so
attention detail an amazing exciting
journey one of the very few jobs
anywhere in the world that you can
travel get paid and experience
phenomenal food feeling like your life
matters because you you’ve had the
experience you and I both have lots of
friends who’ve achieved everything they
could ever dreamed of and they’re
miserable iPhone called help turn them
around they’re missing a meaningful life
and meaning comes from two things
I always tell people happiness comes
from progress if you can do something
where you’re growing and because you’ve
grown you have something to give to
other people that’s meaningful insight
love caring something then life is rich
because happiness comes and goes
happiness does not here every moment and
the happiness isn’t all it’s cracked up
to be meaning is there are people that
have gone through horrible times but a
woman who’s 109 years old and she was
you know when the concentration camps is
the oldest living all costs the survivor
and that woman’s life is so rich because
of all the pain because she’s used that
to help other people still 109 she’s
strong you know she shares her music she
does the things that make her feel like
she’s got a contributions whether or not
she’s fully alive it’s our intention our
intention is everything nothing happens
on this planet without it not one single
thing has ever been accomplished without
intention so I started thinking about my
life and I started thinking about this
conference and what we’re about and and
I looked back and I thought well I was
two people my whole life I was in the
living room entertaining people being a
monkey you know doing my thing for the
company and and trying to relieve my
mother who was suffering she had
rheumatoid arthritis and phlebitis and
everything everything under the Sun that
was nagging at her and she was depressed
and I wanted her to be free and I wanted
her to realize that her life was worth
something because she gave birth to
someone who was worth something and then
with a legal pad I was a little kid I
would sit there and I would try to
figure out what it meant what it was all
about why are we here what is this and
one day I read something from Buddha
that said that all spirituality is about
relieving suffering and I suddenly
realized that’s what I’m doing in the
other room and and I’m aligned you know
this my purpose is aligned with this so
I felt incredibly lucky I lose sight of
that all the time I get caught up in
different concerns and ego concerns but
I’m so lucky to be a part of this
community and to to do something that is
a value and I really cherished that and
we are all one thing it really is true
we believe that what life is truly about
is making other people happier and I
know that sounds very obvious but this
does apply to you as an entrepreneur or
as a leader as a high performer or as
someone who wants to play at world-class
I mean I really believe in this concept
of servant leadership and as I’ve
studied the great entrepreneurs and the
great business builders when the great
humanitarians here’s what I’ve realized
inside sometimes it was very private on
this second point of the purpose of life
they had this acute obsession with
delivering value and helping as many
people as possible and I really do
believe that’s the secondary purpose of
life it’s about helping other being
radically helpful to as many people as
possible and here’s the thing if you’ve
done the interior work so you are so
full there’s no holes within you okay
then you’re not going to be a taker from
the world you’re gonna be a giver and
I’m gonna repeat that again if you look
at the greatest among us they were not
takers they were givers and here’s why I
think they were givers they didn’t
any needs from within they had so fallen
in love with their greatness and their
peace and their joy and their potential
that they didn’t need to take from the
world they didn’t need to take from
other people they really were there well
of wisdom and compassion and self-worth
was so full that they walked out into
their workplace they walked out into
their industries they walked out in
their communities and they were giving
and this applies to you as a business
builder because the more value you give
the more money you’ll make the more your
brand will fly the more customers will
beat a path to your doorstep and for you
as a humanitarian and you might not
think of yourself as a humanitarian but
a humanitarian is simply someone that
cares about humanity and as a
humanitarian the more you give the more
you will open up the doorways to receive
from the rest of the world don’t think
you determine what your purpose is I
think you discover what your purpose is
there’s a difference
determining indicates deciding and I
don’t think you decide I think if you go
about it the right way you discover it
like there’s some people that should be
painting all day they’re great artists I
think Michelangelo was obviously a great
artist it’s great sculptor I mean that
was his purpose in his life
well I believe my purpose is doing what
I’m doing your purpose is why you get
out of bed in the morning do you know
why you get up well most people say well
it’s their go to work well that’d be a
good reason to stay in bed you know you
say well everybody’s doing it that’ll be
another reason to stay in bed if you’re
ever doing what everybody’s doing you’re
probably going in the wrong direction
your purpose is your reason for living
what you want to do is sit down and
maybe take a pen and a pad and then ask
yourself what do I really love doing now
you may have to spend a while at this
you might get up an hour early
every morning and go sit under a tree
somewhere if you’re in a nice climate or
pick a favorite chair someplace where
you’re not going to be disturbed and
totally relaxed and say if I could spend
my life doing something what do I really
love doing now since you don’t ask
yourself that question every day it
might take a while for this answer to
come to the surface but it comes to your
consciousness and it may take a while
you may have to do this every morning
for three months but it would be well
invested the time the only way to deal
with fear that I found in my life is a
couple ways one of those ways is to turn
it on itself and ask yourself what am I
afraid of
I’m afraid of that I got to be more
afraid of what I’m gonna miss out on
missing out on my mission missing out
who I’m supposed to be missing in other
words if you’re not get rid of fear than
use fair use fear or it uses you it’s
that simple so you gotta say okay what’s
the price if I just stay doing this
what’s the price what I need to really
to get scared if I learn all this I
don’t follow through that’s something to
be scared about
and then that fear will get you over
your fear it’ll push you through turn
fear in itself second way you can do it
is use what you’ve probably heard me say
because I’ve used this there was 17 is
my little rocking chair test right I’m
gonna I’m gonna sit myself in my rocking
chair I’m I’m 85 years old looking back
on my life and I say I didn’t do this or
I did dr. Martin Luther King jr. and
Albert Schweitzer and Mahatma Gandhi it
was a very brilliant writer he wrote
some things it really grabbed me he he
wrote deep is to hunger the voice of the
genuine the centering moment during the
time after receiving 238 radiation seed
implants I was reflecting on his words
and and these words kept me up that
night he said the ideal situation for a
man a woman to die if they have found
members praying with them as they cross
over he said but imagine if you will
being on your deathbed and standing
around your bed the ghosts of the dreams
the ideas the abilities the talents
given to you by life and that you for
whatever reason you never went after
that dream you never acted on those
ideas you never use those talents you
never use those gifts and there they are
standing around your bed looking at you
with large angry eyes saying we came to
you and only you could have given us
life and now we must die with you
and the question is if you die today
what dreams what ideas what talents what
books what music what leadership what
voice will die with you
mouths Monroe break or attend speaker
said the wealthiest place in the planet
it’s not in a 40s where there’s oil in
the ground it’s not in South Africa
where the diamond lies is that the
wealthiest place on the planet is the
cemetery but you there you’ll find
greatness if we’ve never seen there you
find talent in genius and potential
never actualize perhaps that’s why Henry
David Thoreau wrote the words Oh God to
reach the point of death only to realize
that you’ve never lived maybe that’s why
some unknown writer wrote the words what
if you live your whole life only to
discover that it was wrong that it was
wrong that you were chosen to do
something else and you didn’t do it
here’s an important point
nothing works the first time when you
try something new it probably won’t work
when you try something new several times
it probably won’t work and the turning
point in my life came when I would hear
good ideas and I was so eager to be
successful in selling I would run out
and try the ideas and they wouldn’t work
I try a way of getting up
answering objection or closing a sale it
wouldn’t work and my natural response ah
and I think yes to be disappointed and
then I realized nothing works at least
the first few times so I decided I would
try a new idea five or ten times before
I pass judgment on I would not just try
it once and quit like most people do and
that changed my whole life it was a
turning point in my life because I
realized from then on if you’ve got a
good idea and you’ve got a good goal and
you want to double your income and
improve the quality of your life and you
have to try new things in order to get
new results it’s not going to work the
first time so you say well that didn’t
work try something else and try
something else and try something else
now if you try only two things can
happen what are they succeed or fail if
you succeed you do more of it if you
fail you learn from it get smarter and
try it again so you cannot lose by
taking action you can only lose by not
taking action thank you some major goal
you want or maybe it’s one you’re
already working on and you have
experienced a lot of setbacks a lot of
defeats you’ve experienced a lot of
disappointment maybe you’ve already
given up and maybe you just need a
little fire a little encouragement to
get back in the game again here’s what I
want you to look at there are winners
and there are losers and there are
people who have not discovered how to
win and all they need is some coaching
all they need is some help and
assistance just a little support all
they need is some insight or different
strategy a plan of action to make some
adjustments that will open up the key to
a whole new future for them that will
give them access to the unlimited power
that they have within themselves that’s
all that they need so what I want you to
do is think about something you want for
you that’s real for you that’s important
for you that will give your life some
special meaning and power and I don’t
even want you to say I can do that I
don’t want you to assume that see five
years ago when I started out
area I would not have been able to make
the mental leap that I would be up to
where I am right now I don’t want you to
begin to just psych yourself out no no I
want you to be able to say something to
yourself that will enable you to
maintain a level of integrity with
yourself that when you say this even
when you face tremendous setbacks it it
will be a benchmark to keep you in the
game to keep you moving forward in
experimenting and readjusting your
strategy and your plan of action
continuously looking for ways to win so
what is that something when you got an
idea you want to move on you might not
have the money you might not have the
education you might not have the support
or resources you need what is that
something that can keep us going that
will enable us to act on our dream
what’s one of those keys that will begin
to help us to discover the secrets to
our dream here’s what I want you to
repeat after me please with power and
conviction say it’s possible that’s all
I want you to do when you look at your
dream you say to yourself every day it’s
possible let’s say that every day to
them it’s possible because what does
that do see it begins to change your
belief system see the way in which we
operate ladies and gentlemen it’s a
manifestation of what we believe what’s
possible for us whatever you’ve done up
to this point all that it really is is a
duplication it’s a reproduction of what
you believe subconsciously that you
deserve and what’s possible for your
life before in April 1954 the common
belief the universe will believe because
it had been tried again and again and
again and people that failed the belief
was that man was not physically capable
of breaking the four-minute barrier that
he could not run a mile in less than
four minutes that was the belief on the
planet it had never been done but here’s
what happened ladies and gentlemen
Roger Bannister came along and he broke
the four-minute barrier now here’s
what’s significant about that since that
time up to this day over 20,000 people
have done it including high school kids
what changed 20,000 people what changed
here’s what happened when they got on
the track they knew it had been done and
because they knew it had been done there
was a new belief about this barrier
about this goal that was unreachable and
those 20,000 people got into raised
believing knowing in the heart that
someone had done it that it’s possible
that they could do it and I’m saying
that if you know anybody that had some
goals some dreams something they wanted
to do and they did it the nice thing
that you know in your heart that if
someone has done it then you can do it
it’s possible and that if someone can
make that dream become a reality that
it’s it’s possible that you can make
your dream become reality most of the
people that watch this are relatively
rich people right I mean and most of
them are gonna earn a living
they’ll eat though live you know they’ll
be fine
beyond that there should be something to
do that’s useful that’s something that
says okay I did something I didn’t just
work on the door-latch all my life or
something
you know what not to say door latches
are bad I mean I’m sure guys work on
their laches and that’s awesome but at
the end of your life you want to say did
I do something of value or in the
beginning or in the middle you know if
every day you go to work and it’s like
office space you know where
oh you did yeah do I care does anybody
care if that’s what it’s gonna be then
get paid less do something useful you’re
gonna be way better off and and chasing
money I never chase money you know
people ask me well I want you to decide
to give it away
I never the problem is I never was
interested in having a toys right but
it’s one of those if you’re trying don’t
try it happens it’s in a cool factor you
said it’s sort of when I was young
anyway if you’re trying to be cool you
weren’t okay it’s so it’s it’s sort of
if you do that that which is has value
you’re much better off my only focus was
to do my one play and I knew if I could
get that to work everything else would
come to pass there’s so many people who
go in so many directions they this week
they’re doing this the next week they’re
doing that and next week they’re doing
this and next week they’re gonna be in
real estate the next week they’re gonna
open a salon it those those kind of
people are all over the place and I
usually try to get them to focus focus
on one thing one area put all of your
energy into watering one area if you
spread the water across many many seeds
you don’t have as much water for one
seed so focus on one thing make it your
priority and stick with it no matter
what no matter how many people told me
no no matter how many people lied to me
no matter how many times I put the show
up and nobody came though I remember
when I did my very first show I worked
my butt off and saved $12,000 tax
returns to maintain our block money I
saved it worked hard saved myself ready
to the 14th Street Playhouse put that
show up thought that 1,200 people would
come over a weekend and 30 showed up and
I knew everyone up but I didn’t stop
that didn’t determine that was in
1992-93 same thing happened
in 94 95 96 97 up until 1998 same
devastation nobody’s showing up in the
audience I’m still in one show a year
working with different promoters trying
to get the show up and nobody showed up
but I didn’t stop and my my what I say
to you now looking at me now Here I am a
human being there’s no difference
between my humaneness
and your eminence the only thing is if
you’re trying to get there
you cannot stop believing in anyway no
matter what anybody says no matter what
anybody tells you you have to know it
beyond knowing it and it is a it is a
feeling when something is for you this
is our newest for me when something’s
for you there’s a feeling that it’s deep
down inside of you that will not allow
you to let it go you have it will it
will keep you going when you can’t even
keep yourself going that’s why the
mantra here at the typewriter studios is
no place where even dreams believe
because there comes a time in your life
where you were too stressed and you try
to get there and you couldn’t on your
own but you have a dream and that dream
has to take on the belief for you
because you can’t do it by yourself
so what I would tell you is this don’t
stop narrow your focus to one idea one
and make it work that would give birth
to all the others yeah I’m not
interested in the financial cost a lot
of continued success but there’s no
specific mark mmm-hmm finances didn’t
work because to be honest with you if
I’m sitting here with you a year from
now two years from now and they like you
did it you’re a billionaire i’ma still
be saying it but I got another idea
right a new idea and it’s what I think
is representation of a person who was
truly ambitious because admission isn’t
a learned behavior it’s a part of your
natural character and you’ll always find
something to be passionate about our new
goal
you see guys sell companies five six
billion dollars and go yeah okay now
what’s the next one we started with four
employees and our goal was to get to 50
employees and the goal really was not so
much to make a lot of money I’m I’m on
it I wanted to me a lot of money in
those days was I want to own a house I
wanna have a nice car and I wanted to
work with interesting people and do
interesting things and I thought if I
could control my own environment have a
small consulting company and Oracle
started out as a software consulting
company we work for tandem computer if
anyone remembers those guys we work for
IBM that we work for a lot of different
tech companies in Silicon Valley doing
contract programming fixed-price
contract programming and we did pretty
well actually and and again the idea was
just to have a small software contract
software company a bunch of you know we
thought were a hotshot programmers and
we thought I could make a decent living
doing just that and quite by accident we
built a product what does it take coming
out of you what’s inside you that
enables you or compels you to make films
with such relentless drive where in the
world of that company it’s I don’t know
it’s hard to say it’s it’s it comes from
from unready normal yeah well you never
know I mean if the demons weren’t
unleashed through film I’d probably go
India you know somewhere and there’s a
theory on Thorazine you know no that I
don’t think that’s true I think it just
has to do with with how films that I
liked it I remembered you know enjoying
and having that exhilaration hit me and
I want to transfer that back to other
people and just studying the craft and
learning how to do it and and the
special thrill as a filmmaker comes from
seeing an immediate audience response
now the only the only other thing the
only other sort of a genre or if it’s
not even a genre but the only the only
other thing that has that effect in
films is comedy and comedy is not my
forte demonstrably yet it people found
that in Terminator and and there’s some
comedy in this film but for a film to
function as a comedy I think there’s a
special magic there and I’m
I’m come creeping toward it but I’m not
sure I can do that but that’s the that’s
the other area where where you can look
at it at a sea of 700 faces and see them
all having the same reaction and you
know you’re touching touching them
that’s I mean I I’m not a performer I
can’t stand up on a stage and tell jokes
or sing or do something that that
affects people directly
the closest thing for me is being able
to sit in the theater and watch a
reaction to something that I’ve put up
on the screen so it’s that one removed
but it’s the same sort of feeling that’s
that’s where the the drive and the
desire to do that comes from a lot of
people who are biting their fingers and
fear that they might lose their jobs but
there are few people who have decided
within themselves I’m going to make it
some people aren’t waiting to be cut
some people are moving on their own
because they feel within themselves I’ve
got what it takes to make it they’re not
afraid about tomorrow because of how
they see themselves because of what they
feel that they deserve because of what
they feel that they can create for
themselves because these people have
decided as they look at the future as
they look at themselves there’s a way
where there’s a will there’s a way for
me to begin to create a way out of no
way and when you have that kind of
consciousness when you have that kind of
spirit nothing can stop you
nothing what would your life be like as
you look toward the future if you
decided I’m not going to allow my fears
to stop me what would your life be like
what would your future be like if you
decided to to want that which you desire
so strongly that it prepares you past
your fears that you experienced a fear
as the one book says feel the fear and
do it anyway what would your life be
like
and I’m saying to you that all of us who
have been entombed by fear have the
capacity to resurrect ourselves and to
resurrect our dreams you will embarrass
yourself you will suck at something
there’s no doubt about it and I know
that’s probably not a traditional
message for a graduation ceremony but
hey I’m telling you embrace it because
it’s inevitable and I should know in the
acting business you fail all the time
early on in my career I auditioned for a
part in a Broadway musical perfect role
for me I thought except for the fact
that I can’t sing so I’m in the wings
I’m about to go on stage but the guy in
front of me he’s singing like like like
Pavarotti going on and on and on and I’m
just shrinking I’m getting smaller and
smaller so they say oh thank you very
much thank you very much and you will
you’ll be hearing from us so I come out
with my little music and it was it was a
just my imagination by the temptations
that’s what I came up with so I hand it
to the the the accompany us and she
looks at it and looks at me and looks at
it the director and was like so I start
[Music]
once again I’m coming away with me and
they’re not saying anything so I’m
thinking I’m getting better I start
getting into it running this hour yeah
yeah thank you thank you thank you thank
you very much mr. Washington thank you
so I assumed I didn’t get the job but
the next part of the audition he called
me back the next part of the audition is
the acting part of the audition so I’m
like hey okay maybe I can’t sing but I
know I can act so they pair me with this
guy and again I didn’t know about
musical theater and musical theater is
big so they can reach everyone all the
way in the back of the stadium and I’m
more from realistic naturalistic kind of
acting where you you know you actually
talk to the person next to you so I
don’t know what my line was my line was
will hand me the cut and his line was
well I will hand you the cup my dear the
say okay well should I give you the cup
back oh yes you should give it back to
me because you know that is my cup and
it should be given back to me I didn’t
but here’s the thing I didn’t quit I
didn’t fall back I walked out of there
to prepare for the next audition and the
next audition and the next audition I
prayed I prayed and I pray but I
continue to fail and fail and fail but
it didn’t matter because you know what
there’s an old saying you hang around
the barbershop long enough sooner or
later you’re gonna get a haircut so you
will catch a break and I did catch a
break last year I did a play called
fences on Broadway if someone talked
about it won the Tony Award and I didn’t
have to sing by the way but here’s the
kicker it was at the Court Theatre it
was at the same theatre that I failed
that first audition 30 years prior the
point is and I’ll pick up the pace the
point is every graduate here today has
the training and the talent to succeed but do you have the guts to fail
life I remember it 14 15 years old
watching some classic films not well
spending months and months watching all
the great classics all the great
performers of the past and being so
incredibly inspired by them and saying
to myself one day I want to come close
to doing something that good so that I
think that that thirst or that drive to
just achieve what I believe is something
as good as you know those heroes that I
have is what continues to make me want
to want to do this boom wasn’t built in
a day we all know that everyone’s hears
that but Rome also didn’t fall apart
overnight either it took hundreds of
years for Rome to reach its peak but it
also took time hundreds of years for
Rome to decay and fall apart and that is
representative of life because you don’t
achieve worthwhile goals quickly or
easily they take time they take struggle
they take relentless pursuit day in and
but also things don’t usually fall apart
quickly either at least at first it’s
it’s a slow process a little slip here a
little setback over there a little
wearing down of discipline and will over
time that’s the thing success and
failure are generally slow processes
either slowly building things up or
gradually tearing them down and that’s
you have to watch you have to watch
because those seconds they turn into
minutes then minutes turn into hours and
hours turn into days and days turn in to
years and so that second that second
that just went by that counted and so
did that second and so did that one
and in those precious seconds
you’re either building or you’re
decaying you were either gaining ground
or you were losing ground in that second
so
make every second count I’m not mr.
mentor I’m not the one who says let’s
sit down tell me how it’s going oh I’m
gonna tell you exactly how I am get off
your ass and get out there and sell
something that’s right I mean I’ve never
been the okay I need a mentor you know a
lot of people look for mentors thinking
they’re gonna tell me the shortcut mark
will you be my mentor you know the way
and they think I’m gonna go convey some
magics here’s the dust go go go
it doesn’t work that way I still grind
I love the grind if you’re competing on
one of my businesses I’m gonna kick your
ass cuz I’m gonna I’ll grind you right
that’s what being an entrepreneur that
an entrepreneur is you’ve got to get out
there and do the work so when it comes
to how do you learn right because that’s
the question how do I learn this stuff
and everybody everybody has got to go
through that process right I read our
I’m in the tech business I’m in media
business the entertainment business I’ve
got to try to prepare myself for all the
Shark Tank businesses I read three hours
plus a day right what everybody else is
getting a suntan or even when I’m
getting a suntan I’ve got I’m online or
I’ve got books I’m reading all I can
I’m inspired YouTube we’re gonna make
this the episode thing you’ll get
whatever you want Tyler but this is the
core of it you just saw it on stage
that’s just you just saw it on stage
dying on your sword is better than dying
on someone else’s so many of you are
doing things making decisions and
navigating your lives based on somebody
else’s thesis you’re doing it because
you think it’s the right thing because
your dad’s telling you it’s the right
thing you’re doing what you’re doing
right now cuz you’re pandering to your
boss even though you don’t believe in it
or try so hard in our lives to fit in we
try to fit into certain groups certain
frats certain sororities you know
amongst certain friends yet the people
we idolize our most are the ones that
stand out but when you’re prepared there
is no fear there is no fear of failure
okay because even if you’ve walked out
of something and you feel like you’ve
failed at it your preparation is so
strong that you’re gonna take that
failure and turn it into the outcome you
desire and most people stop at failure
okay we’ve all failed at things I’m
gonna continue to fail at stuff like
it’s the most powerful tool you can use
but it all depends on how you use it you
know we talk about it in relentless okay
a scalpel okay in the hands of an
individual it can do unbelievable damage
in the hands of a professional of a
doctor it saves lives so it’s the same
thing with failure it’s how you use it
it’s that drive inside of you okay it’s
what we talk about the dark side the
dark side is filled with failure but
it’s the fuel that burns you like
something that’s never burned inside you
before this is how it’s gonna play out
you are doing things right now yesterday
you made a decision that you don’t
believe in but you’re smart you did it
because you know how your company’s
scores here’s the problem with
disruption and innovation right now
you’re being rewarded for being a yes
person and in 36 months you’re gonna be
fired for being a yes person
and you’re doing it because you just
need the security of your job I’m
telling you right now if you’re watching
this vlog and you’ve got like that means
you have a certain DNA please I implore
you please die on your sword not
somebody else’s if you’re gonna lose
it’s much more fun to lose based on what
you thought do you mean do you know how
many of you are gonna lose on somebody
else’s thesis it’s gonna kill at you
it’s gonna eat at you it’s going to be
the worst feeling so please pause this
video right now and ask yourself am i
doing much because of me then you’re
good whether you’re winning or losing or
am i doing it because somebody else is
telling me it’s the right way or I’m
subconsciously pandering to please
somebody or something because I need the
short-term stability figured out the gal
you know it and I know it that takes
years to become a great chef what you
need to do is establish confidence in
yourself cooking is an amazing journey
and don’t think you can learn it within
three or four years it’s like studying
medicine there’s over a 10 to 15 year
period I’m 42 years of age and I’m still
learning new exciting things now that I
bring back to the fold but more
importantly provisionally
I didn’t think French was important at
school and I kicked myself now because I
went live in France for three years and
became bilingual but I wish I’d studied
harder with a second language on my belt
that gives you a different culture gives
you a completely different level of
confidence learning French French
cuisine mannerism and cooking in a very
robust tenacious way so yeah vision and
open-mindedness and we never cut corners
and then you start cutting corners in
food timeout there’s no worse job to
have than to cut corners in food so
attention detail an amazing exciting
journey one of the very few jobs
anywhere in the world that you can
travel get paid and experience
phenomenal food feeling like your life
matters because you you’ve had the
experience you and I both have lots of
friends who’ve achieved everything they
could ever dreamed of and they’re
miserable iPhone called help turn them
around they’re missing a meaningful life
and meaning comes from two things
I always tell people happiness comes
from progress if you can do something
where you’re growing and because you’ve
grown you have something to give to
other people that’s meaningful insight
love caring something then life is rich
because happiness comes and goes
happiness does not here every moment and
the happiness isn’t all it’s cracked up
to be meaning is there are people that
have gone through horrible times but a
woman who’s 109 years old and she was
you know when the concentration camps is
the oldest living all costs the survivor
and that woman’s life is so rich because
of all the pain because she’s used that
to help other people still 109 she’s
strong you know she shares her music she
does the things that make her feel like
she’s got a contributions whether or not
she’s fully alive it’s our intention our
intention is everything nothing happens
on this planet without it not one single
thing has ever been accomplished without
intention so I started thinking about my
life and I started thinking about this
conference and what we’re about and and
I looked back and I thought well I was
two people my whole life I was in the
living room entertaining people being a
monkey you know doing my thing for the
company and and trying to relieve my
mother who was suffering she had
rheumatoid arthritis and phlebitis and
everything everything under the Sun that
was nagging at her and she was depressed
and I wanted her to be free and I wanted
her to realize that her life was worth
something because she gave birth to
someone who was worth something and then
with a legal pad I was a little kid I
would sit there and I would try to
figure out what it meant what it was all
about why are we here what is this and
one day I read something from Buddha
that said that all spirituality is about
relieving suffering and I suddenly
realized that’s what I’m doing in the
other room and and I’m aligned you know
this my purpose is aligned with this so
I felt incredibly lucky I lose sight of
that all the time I get caught up in
different concerns and ego concerns but
I’m so lucky to be a part of this
community and to to do something that is
a value and I really cherished that and
we are all one thing it really is true
we believe that what life is truly about
is making other people happier and I
know that sounds very obvious but this
does apply to you as an entrepreneur or
as a leader as a high performer or as
someone who wants to play at world-class
I mean I really believe in this concept
of servant leadership and as I’ve
studied the great entrepreneurs and the
great business builders when the great
humanitarians here’s what I’ve realized
inside sometimes it was very private on
this second point of the purpose of life
they had this acute obsession with
delivering value and helping as many
people as possible and I really do
believe that’s the secondary purpose of
life it’s about helping other being
radically helpful to as many people as
possible and here’s the thing if you’ve
done the interior work so you are so
full there’s no holes within you okay
then you’re not going to be a taker from
the world you’re gonna be a giver and
I’m gonna repeat that again if you look
at the greatest among us they were not
takers they were givers and here’s why I
think they were givers they didn’t
any needs from within they had so fallen
in love with their greatness and their
peace and their joy and their potential
that they didn’t need to take from the
world they didn’t need to take from
other people they really were there well
of wisdom and compassion and self-worth
was so full that they walked out into
their workplace they walked out into
their industries they walked out in
their communities and they were giving
and this applies to you as a business
builder because the more value you give
the more money you’ll make the more your
brand will fly the more customers will
beat a path to your doorstep and for you
as a humanitarian and you might not
think of yourself as a humanitarian but
a humanitarian is simply someone that
cares about humanity and as a
humanitarian the more you give the more
you will open up the doorways to receive
from the rest of the world don’t think
you determine what your purpose is I
think you discover what your purpose is
there’s a difference
determining indicates deciding and I
don’t think you decide I think if you go
about it the right way you discover it
like there’s some people that should be
painting all day they’re great artists I
think Michelangelo was obviously a great
artist it’s great sculptor I mean that
was his purpose in his life
well I believe my purpose is doing what
I’m doing your purpose is why you get
out of bed in the morning do you know
why you get up well most people say well
it’s their go to work well that’d be a
good reason to stay in bed you know you
say well everybody’s doing it that’ll be
another reason to stay in bed if you’re
ever doing what everybody’s doing you’re
probably going in the wrong direction
your purpose is your reason for living
what you want to do is sit down and
maybe take a pen and a pad and then ask
yourself what do I really love doing now
you may have to spend a while at this
you might get up an hour early
every morning and go sit under a tree
somewhere if you’re in a nice climate or
pick a favorite chair someplace where
you’re not going to be disturbed and
totally relaxed and say if I could spend
my life doing something what do I really
love doing now since you don’t ask
yourself that question every day it
might take a while for this answer to
come to the surface but it comes to your
consciousness and it may take a while
you may have to do this every morning
for three months but it would be well
invested the time the only way to deal
with fear that I found in my life is a
couple ways one of those ways is to turn
it on itself and ask yourself what am I
afraid of
I’m afraid of that I got to be more
afraid of what I’m gonna miss out on
missing out on my mission missing out
who I’m supposed to be missing in other
words if you’re not get rid of fear than
use fair use fear or it uses you it’s
that simple so you gotta say okay what’s
the price if I just stay doing this
what’s the price what I need to really
to get scared if I learn all this I
don’t follow through that’s something to
be scared about
and then that fear will get you over
your fear it’ll push you through turn
fear in itself second way you can do it
is use what you’ve probably heard me say
because I’ve used this there was 17 is
my little rocking chair test right I’m
gonna I’m gonna sit myself in my rocking
chair I’m I’m 85 years old looking back
on my life and I say I didn’t do this or
I did dr. Martin Luther King jr. and
Albert Schweitzer and Mahatma Gandhi it
was a very brilliant writer he wrote
some things it really grabbed me he he
wrote deep is to hunger the voice of the
genuine the centering moment during the
time after receiving 238 radiation seed
implants I was reflecting on his words
and and these words kept me up that
night he said the ideal situation for a
man a woman to die if they have found
members praying with them as they cross
over he said but imagine if you will
being on your deathbed and standing
around your bed the ghosts of the dreams
the ideas the abilities the talents
given to you by life and that you for
whatever reason you never went after
that dream you never acted on those
ideas you never use those talents you
never use those gifts and there they are
standing around your bed looking at you
with large angry eyes saying we came to
you and only you could have given us
life and now we must die with you
and the question is if you die today
what dreams what ideas what talents what
books what music what leadership what
voice will die with you
mouths Monroe break or attend speaker
said the wealthiest place in the planet
it’s not in a 40s where there’s oil in
the ground it’s not in South Africa
where the diamond lies is that the
wealthiest place on the planet is the
cemetery but you there you’ll find
greatness if we’ve never seen there you
find talent in genius and potential
never actualize perhaps that’s why Henry
David Thoreau wrote the words Oh God to
reach the point of death only to realize
that you’ve never lived maybe that’s why
some unknown writer wrote the words what
if you live your whole life only to
discover that it was wrong that it was
wrong that you were chosen to do
something else and you didn’t do it
here’s an important point
nothing works the first time when you
try something new it probably won’t work
when you try something new several times
it probably won’t work and the turning
point in my life came when I would hear
good ideas and I was so eager to be
successful in selling I would run out
and try the ideas and they wouldn’t work
I try a way of getting up
answering objection or closing a sale it
wouldn’t work and my natural response ah
and I think yes to be disappointed and
then I realized nothing works at least
the first few times so I decided I would
try a new idea five or ten times before
I pass judgment on I would not just try
it once and quit like most people do and
that changed my whole life it was a
turning point in my life because I
realized from then on if you’ve got a
good idea and you’ve got a good goal and
you want to double your income and
improve the quality of your life and you
have to try new things in order to get
new results it’s not going to work the
first time so you say well that didn’t
work try something else and try
something else and try something else
now if you try only two things can
happen what are they succeed or fail if
you succeed you do more of it if you
fail you learn from it get smarter and
try it again so you cannot lose by
taking action you can only lose by not
taking action thank you some major goal
you want or maybe it’s one you’re
already working on and you have
experienced a lot of setbacks a lot of
defeats you’ve experienced a lot of
disappointment maybe you’ve already
given up and maybe you just need a
little fire a little encouragement to
get back in the game again here’s what I
want you to look at there are winners
and there are losers and there are
people who have not discovered how to
win and all they need is some coaching
all they need is some help and
assistance just a little support all
they need is some insight or different
strategy a plan of action to make some
adjustments that will open up the key to
a whole new future for them that will
give them access to the unlimited power
that they have within themselves that’s
all that they need so what I want you to
do is think about something you want for
you that’s real for you that’s important
for you that will give your life some
special meaning and power and I don’t
even want you to say I can do that I
don’t want you to assume that see five
years ago when I started out
area I would not have been able to make
the mental leap that I would be up to
where I am right now I don’t want you to
begin to just psych yourself out no no I
want you to be able to say something to
yourself that will enable you to
maintain a level of integrity with
yourself that when you say this even
when you face tremendous setbacks it it
will be a benchmark to keep you in the
game to keep you moving forward in
experimenting and readjusting your
strategy and your plan of action
continuously looking for ways to win so
what is that something when you got an
idea you want to move on you might not
have the money you might not have the
education you might not have the support
or resources you need what is that
something that can keep us going that
will enable us to act on our dream
what’s one of those keys that will begin
to help us to discover the secrets to
our dream here’s what I want you to
repeat after me please with power and
conviction say it’s possible that’s all
I want you to do when you look at your
dream you say to yourself every day it’s
possible let’s say that every day to
them it’s possible because what does
that do see it begins to change your
belief system see the way in which we
operate ladies and gentlemen it’s a
manifestation of what we believe what’s
possible for us whatever you’ve done up
to this point all that it really is is a
duplication it’s a reproduction of what
you believe subconsciously that you
deserve and what’s possible for your
life before in April 1954 the common
belief the universe will believe because
it had been tried again and again and
again and people that failed the belief
was that man was not physically capable
of breaking the four-minute barrier that
he could not run a mile in less than
four minutes that was the belief on the
planet it had never been done but here’s
what happened ladies and gentlemen
Roger Bannister came along and he broke
the four-minute barrier now here’s
what’s significant about that since that
time up to this day over 20,000 people
have done it including high school kids
what changed 20,000 people what changed
here’s what happened when they got on
the track they knew it had been done and
because they knew it had been done there
was a new belief about this barrier
about this goal that was unreachable and
those 20,000 people got into raised
believing knowing in the heart that
someone had done it that it’s possible
that they could do it and I’m saying
that if you know anybody that had some
goals some dreams something they wanted
to do and they did it the nice thing
that you know in your heart that if
someone has done it then you can do it
it’s possible and that if someone can
make that dream become a reality that
it’s it’s possible that you can make
your dream become reality most of the
people that watch this are relatively
rich people right I mean and most of
them are gonna earn a living
they’ll eat though live you know they’ll
be fine
beyond that there should be something to
do that’s useful that’s something that
says okay I did something I didn’t just
work on the door-latch all my life or
something
you know what not to say door latches
are bad I mean I’m sure guys work on
their laches and that’s awesome but at
the end of your life you want to say did
I do something of value or in the
beginning or in the middle you know if
every day you go to work and it’s like
office space you know where
oh you did yeah do I care does anybody
care if that’s what it’s gonna be then
get paid less do something useful you’re
gonna be way better off and and chasing
money I never chase money you know
people ask me well I want you to decide
to give it away
I never the problem is I never was
interested in having a toys right but
it’s one of those if you’re trying don’t
try it happens it’s in a cool factor you
said it’s sort of when I was young
anyway if you’re trying to be cool you
weren’t okay it’s so it’s it’s sort of
if you do that that which is has value
you’re much better off my only focus was
to do my one play and I knew if I could
get that to work everything else would
come to pass there’s so many people who
go in so many directions they this week
they’re doing this the next week they’re
doing that and next week they’re doing
this and next week they’re gonna be in
real estate the next week they’re gonna
open a salon it those those kind of
people are all over the place and I
usually try to get them to focus focus
on one thing one area put all of your
energy into watering one area if you
spread the water across many many seeds
you don’t have as much water for one
seed so focus on one thing make it your
priority and stick with it no matter
what no matter how many people told me
no no matter how many people lied to me
no matter how many times I put the show
up and nobody came though I remember
when I did my very first show I worked
my butt off and saved $12,000 tax
returns to maintain our block money I
saved it worked hard saved myself ready
to the 14th Street Playhouse put that
show up thought that 1,200 people would
come over a weekend and 30 showed up and
I knew everyone up but I didn’t stop
that didn’t determine that was in
1992-93 same thing happened
in 94 95 96 97 up until 1998 same
devastation nobody’s showing up in the
audience I’m still in one show a year
working with different promoters trying
to get the show up and nobody showed up
but I didn’t stop and my my what I say
to you now looking at me now Here I am a
human being there’s no difference
between my humaneness
and your eminence the only thing is if
you’re trying to get there
you cannot stop believing in anyway no
matter what anybody says no matter what
anybody tells you you have to know it
beyond knowing it and it is a it is a
feeling when something is for you this
is our newest for me when something’s
for you there’s a feeling that it’s deep
down inside of you that will not allow
you to let it go you have it will it
will keep you going when you can’t even
keep yourself going that’s why the
mantra here at the typewriter studios is
no place where even dreams believe
because there comes a time in your life
where you were too stressed and you try
to get there and you couldn’t on your
own but you have a dream and that dream
has to take on the belief for you
because you can’t do it by yourself
so what I would tell you is this don’t
stop narrow your focus to one idea one
and make it work that would give birth
to all the others yeah I’m not
interested in the financial cost a lot
of continued success but there’s no
specific mark mmm-hmm finances didn’t
work because to be honest with you if
I’m sitting here with you a year from
now two years from now and they like you
did it you’re a billionaire i’ma still
be saying it but I got another idea
right a new idea and it’s what I think
is representation of a person who was
truly ambitious because admission isn’t
a learned behavior it’s a part of your
natural character and you’ll always find
something to be passionate about our new
goal
you see guys sell companies five six
billion dollars and go yeah okay now
what’s the next one we started with four
employees and our goal was to get to 50
employees and the goal really was not so
much to make a lot of money I’m I’m on
it I wanted to me a lot of money in
those days was I want to own a house I
wanna have a nice car and I wanted to
work with interesting people and do
interesting things and I thought if I
could control my own environment have a
small consulting company and Oracle
started out as a software consulting
company we work for tandem computer if
anyone remembers those guys we work for
IBM that we work for a lot of different
tech companies in Silicon Valley doing
contract programming fixed-price
contract programming and we did pretty
well actually and and again the idea was
just to have a small software contract
software company a bunch of you know we
thought were a hotshot programmers and
we thought I could make a decent living
doing just that and quite by accident we
built a product what does it take coming
out of you what’s inside you that
enables you or compels you to make films
with such relentless drive where in the
world of that company it’s I don’t know
it’s hard to say it’s it’s it comes from
from unready normal yeah well you never
know I mean if the demons weren’t
unleashed through film I’d probably go
India you know somewhere and there’s a
theory on Thorazine you know no that I
don’t think that’s true I think it just
has to do with with how films that I
liked it I remembered you know enjoying
and having that exhilaration hit me and
I want to transfer that back to other
people and just studying the craft and
learning how to do it and and the
special thrill as a filmmaker comes from
seeing an immediate audience response
now the only the only other thing the
only other sort of a genre or if it’s
not even a genre but the only the only
other thing that has that effect in
films is comedy and comedy is not my
forte demonstrably yet it people found
that in Terminator and and there’s some
comedy in this film but for a film to
function as a comedy I think there’s a
special magic there and I’m
I’m come creeping toward it but I’m not
sure I can do that but that’s the that’s
the other area where where you can look
at it at a sea of 700 faces and see them
all having the same reaction and you
know you’re touching touching them
that’s I mean I I’m not a performer I
can’t stand up on a stage and tell jokes
or sing or do something that that
affects people directly
the closest thing for me is being able
to sit in the theater and watch a
reaction to something that I’ve put up
on the screen so it’s that one removed
but it’s the same sort of feeling that’s
that’s where the the drive and the
desire to do that comes from a lot of
people who are biting their fingers and
fear that they might lose their jobs but
there are few people who have decided
within themselves I’m going to make it
some people aren’t waiting to be cut
some people are moving on their own
because they feel within themselves I’ve
got what it takes to make it they’re not
afraid about tomorrow because of how
they see themselves because of what they
feel that they deserve because of what
they feel that they can create for
themselves because these people have
decided as they look at the future as
they look at themselves there’s a way
where there’s a will there’s a way for
me to begin to create a way out of no
way and when you have that kind of
consciousness when you have that kind of
spirit nothing can stop you
nothing what would your life be like as
you look toward the future if you
decided I’m not going to allow my fears
to stop me what would your life be like
what would your future be like if you
decided to to want that which you desire
so strongly that it prepares you past
your fears that you experienced a fear
as the one book says feel the fear and
do it anyway what would your life be
like
and I’m saying to you that all of us who
have been entombed by fear have the
capacity to resurrect ourselves and to
resurrect our dreams you will embarrass
yourself you will suck at something
there’s no doubt about it and I know
that’s probably not a traditional
message for a graduation ceremony but
hey I’m telling you embrace it because
it’s inevitable and I should know in the
acting business you fail all the time
early on in my career I auditioned for a
part in a Broadway musical perfect role
for me I thought except for the fact
that I can’t sing so I’m in the wings
I’m about to go on stage but the guy in
front of me he’s singing like like like
Pavarotti going on and on and on and I’m
just shrinking I’m getting smaller and
smaller so they say oh thank you very
much thank you very much and you will
you’ll be hearing from us so I come out
with my little music and it was it was a
just my imagination by the temptations
that’s what I came up with so I hand it
to the the the accompany us and she
looks at it and looks at me and looks at
it the director and was like so I start
[Music]
once again I’m coming away with me and
they’re not saying anything so I’m
thinking I’m getting better I start
getting into it running this hour yeah
yeah thank you thank you thank you thank
you very much mr. Washington thank you
so I assumed I didn’t get the job but
the next part of the audition he called
me back the next part of the audition is
the acting part of the audition so I’m
like hey okay maybe I can’t sing but I
know I can act so they pair me with this
guy and again I didn’t know about
musical theater and musical theater is
big so they can reach everyone all the
way in the back of the stadium and I’m
more from realistic naturalistic kind of
acting where you you know you actually
talk to the person next to you so I
don’t know what my line was my line was
will hand me the cut and his line was
well I will hand you the cup my dear the
say okay well should I give you the cup
back oh yes you should give it back to
me because you know that is my cup and
it should be given back to me I didn’t
but here’s the thing I didn’t quit I
didn’t fall back I walked out of there
to prepare for the next audition and the
next audition and the next audition I
prayed I prayed and I pray but I
continue to fail and fail and fail but
it didn’t matter because you know what
there’s an old saying you hang around
the barbershop long enough sooner or
later you’re gonna get a haircut so you
will catch a break and I did catch a
break last year I did a play called
fences on Broadway if someone talked
about it won the Tony Award and I didn’t
have to sing by the way but here’s the
kicker it was at the Court Theatre it
was at the same theatre that I failed
that first audition 30 years prior the
point is and I’ll pick up the pace the
point is every graduate here today has
the training and the talent to succeed but do you have the guts to fail
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