they certainly do suck spent the next
five years playing hide and go suck as
her little vampire cabana boy
welcome to watchmojo.com and today we’re
counting down our picks for the top 10
worst vampire movies only the living can
kill the dead for this list we’ve only
picked feature films all of which are
terrible and all of which involve
vampires oh she would love to become a
vampire as she practically brings it up
Oh
number 10 immortal yours also known as
kiss of the vampire
I’m morning vampire this straight-to-dvd
cinematic disaster features a vampire
tempted by sweet romance and the power
of the Illuminati
should give the Illuminati the
immortality they so desperately seek out
of staggering 111 minutes immortal yours
challenges the patience of unsuspecting
viewers especially with all the
overacting and college-level production
design we’re dealing with a nightmare
vampires
while the passionate love scenes remind
us of 4 a.m. Cinemax skin flicks their
real purpose is probably to help young
fanboys see their first boob tonight
confirmed that the dialogue of immortal
yours is simply catastrophic and the
gore will have you frozen in pure
astonishment prepare yourself to be
moved as in moving on to something more
worthwhile we can’t go on like this
anymore
movin from city to city country to
country
number nine thirty days of night dark
days we wait till tart till they go out
and night after the success of 2007 30
days of night a fresh cast was assembled
for a biting sequel with a new director
and the final result ended in dark days
for hopeful moviegoers last year when
the Sun set for 30 days our town Barrow
Alaska
came under siege by a clan of vampires
as the wife of the late Evan
Stella spreads her husband’s message of
vampires all over the world and her
enemies actually hide by wearing
sunglasses in auditoriums
if there are any of you out there I
suggest you stand and show yourselves
while 30 days of night dark days
reintroduce to the world to Michael
Dawson have lost most viewers would
rather spend time on a deserted island
than endure the 92 minutes of this
brutal sequel I know where they’re
hiding take care of him number 8 Dracula
to ascension I was right ship we found a
vampire this American Romanian
production combined the absurd with
downright offensive imagery a sequel to
Dracula mm patrick lussier film
chronicled the story of a vatican
vampire hunter and his quest to end
Dracula forever I don’t know it’s a
vampire nobody’s kidding themselves here
see because Dracula is actually judas
iscariot father who feet II could not
have predicted the proverbial card of
the vampire sleep but at least viewers
received a little closure in the end
well
no they actually did not
at counting this film has it all if
you’re looking for everything terrible
in cinema
seven hundred and thirty seven thousand
eight hundred and ninety nine number
seven
Dracula dead and loving it Count Dracula
I’m sorry my dear but you have such a
lovely reciprocal mobility even legends
make a few mistakes right and for your
miserable performance you will receive
no tip
who knows what Mel Brooks was thinking
when he made this comedy and maybe
there’s a reason he hasn’t directed a
film since I have been to many many
takings you have to know to understand
you know everything in life is location
location okay with humor perfect for
your grandma or grandpa Dracula dead and
loving it builds off classic themes of
the genre with painfully awkward
performances including one by Brooks
himself as van Helsing hello I am still
standing professor van Helsing outdated
and dead on arrival this flick has no
tick she’s almost dead she’s dead enough
number six Vampire Academy damn back to
the Vampire Academy as the daughter of
Back to the Future actress Lea Thompson
Zoe Deutsch was blessed with beauty and
brains but this young adult film had
viewers dreaming of a time machine
headed for a better movie having that
dream wasn’t a dream as a half-human
half-vampire
Rose Hathaway trains to protect her own
but the style and tone of Vampire
Academy failed to connect with younger
viewers or the entire world for that
matter
please don’t say Vampire Academy I find
the time to be quite you set someone on
fire it’s horrible in the most hilarious
of ways a film with potential but unsure
how to use it yeah I want you to say all
those things good night all
number five Abraham Lincoln vampire
hunter Abraham Lincoln as proof that
Hollywood will do absolutely anything to
make a few bucks this adaptation of Seth
grahame-smith snarl effectively shook
the grave of a US president for whatever
else I am a husband lawyer a president
she’ll always think of myself as a man
who struggled against darkness Abraham
Lincoln vampire hunter portrayed a world
in which Honest Abe had more problems
than we could imagine and ultimately
Confused the minds of young history
students I thought you were an honest
man really a stand-up comic starred in
the title role for crying out loud and
we all know that Lincoln most likely
would have preferred Brad Pitt you
weren’t ready to know what you were a
vampire the vampire hunter rode the
railroad into more Beckman bet Huff’s
film but it was the film itself that was
a symbolic trainwreck
number four the Twilight franchise you
really should have figured that out a
little earlier love them or hate them
every single one of the Twilight films
is factually horrible what does that
mean
this information may disturb millions of
loyal fans but if you’re moved to tears
by the story of Bella Edward and Jacob
then you probably need to watch more
films I’m just gonna be around for a
long time isn’t she very long time sure
the vampire stories made a gazillion
dollars but the relentless assault on
innocent moviegoers caused unwanted
stress and even a fear of cinema for
some why did you hate me so much when we
met we need vampire movies that inspire
not films that take over the
subconscious minds of our world’s
children it’s not too late to change
your mind what no you’re having second
thoughts you are number three vampires
suck your beloved Edward isn’t here to
save you speaking of cultural influence
a group of actual human beings once
decided that this film had to be made
riding on the tail of the Twilight
phenomenon Vampires Suck made fun of
brutal genre films while simultaneously
adding to the collection see what you
want about them but they do know how to
party
with lame pop cultural references and
mediocre performances this movie
quadrupled its budget in profits which
speaks volumes about the current state
of cinema
I got skilled rich 82 minutes too long
Vampires Suck is a modern meta disaster
stop you’re going to hurt yourself
number two vampire in Brooklyn there’s a
killer on the loose it’s hard to tell a
celebrity no am i right
fresh off the heels of Beverly Hills Cop
3 Annie Murphy decided it was a good
career choice to star in Wes Craven’s
tale of Big Apple bloodsuckers a woman
smiles so lovely it could brighten the
darkest night edited by the director of
our number 8 entry vampire in Brooklyn
was actually written by Eddie Murphy and
allowed him to show off his comedic
versatility with several roles that was
my phone no no that was my fault I
apologize that friend was drunk that way
in perhaps the biggest slam from critics
Roger Ebert once noted well the movie is
unpleasant to look at and my overall
memory of it is people screaming in the
shadows vampire failed there’s nothing
wrong with being just a little crazy
before we unveil our top pick here are a
few honorable mentions
you had him every night in your dreams
you never gave in Cher
I took you
staring into the all-consuming void the
dark shadows of one’s soul is heavy
hey vampire
I know you can hear me because I could
hear you
number one blood rain this is the work
of a young vampire out-of-control
blood rage directed by Eva bull enough
said that’s ridiculous
oh you need more well the legendary Ben
Kingsley said it best quote prepare to
witness the beginning of a new era a
start night prepare to witness the
beginning of a new era as the vampire
film destined to become the worst of its
kind
blood rain changed the video game it was
based on and introduced a new kind of
awful can I see your teeth
Christina Logan starred in this slasher
video game adaptation as a mixed-breed
vampire out for vengeance finally we
agree on something
with a rather talented ensemble that
agreed to be dressed in ridiculous garb
one has to question this film’s very
existence and whether the entire
production was part of some conspiracy
hungry bitch we need answers meat loaf
to life do you agree with our list oh my
god we won what’s your favorite worst
vampire movie
well I don’t want to talk about that
it’s not fair I was drunk
for more mind-blowing top 10s published
every day be sure to subscribe to
watchmojo.com
you’re being so foolish you’ve been
lying to us
five years playing hide and go suck as
her little vampire cabana boy
welcome to watchmojo.com and today we’re
counting down our picks for the top 10
worst vampire movies only the living can
kill the dead for this list we’ve only
picked feature films all of which are
terrible and all of which involve
vampires oh she would love to become a
vampire as she practically brings it up
Oh
number 10 immortal yours also known as
kiss of the vampire
I’m morning vampire this straight-to-dvd
cinematic disaster features a vampire
tempted by sweet romance and the power
of the Illuminati
should give the Illuminati the
immortality they so desperately seek out
of staggering 111 minutes immortal yours
challenges the patience of unsuspecting
viewers especially with all the
overacting and college-level production
design we’re dealing with a nightmare
vampires
while the passionate love scenes remind
us of 4 a.m. Cinemax skin flicks their
real purpose is probably to help young
fanboys see their first boob tonight
confirmed that the dialogue of immortal
yours is simply catastrophic and the
gore will have you frozen in pure
astonishment prepare yourself to be
moved as in moving on to something more
worthwhile we can’t go on like this
anymore
movin from city to city country to
country
number nine thirty days of night dark
days we wait till tart till they go out
and night after the success of 2007 30
days of night a fresh cast was assembled
for a biting sequel with a new director
and the final result ended in dark days
for hopeful moviegoers last year when
the Sun set for 30 days our town Barrow
Alaska
came under siege by a clan of vampires
as the wife of the late Evan
Stella spreads her husband’s message of
vampires all over the world and her
enemies actually hide by wearing
sunglasses in auditoriums
if there are any of you out there I
suggest you stand and show yourselves
while 30 days of night dark days
reintroduce to the world to Michael
Dawson have lost most viewers would
rather spend time on a deserted island
than endure the 92 minutes of this
brutal sequel I know where they’re
hiding take care of him number 8 Dracula
to ascension I was right ship we found a
vampire this American Romanian
production combined the absurd with
downright offensive imagery a sequel to
Dracula mm patrick lussier film
chronicled the story of a vatican
vampire hunter and his quest to end
Dracula forever I don’t know it’s a
vampire nobody’s kidding themselves here
see because Dracula is actually judas
iscariot father who feet II could not
have predicted the proverbial card of
the vampire sleep but at least viewers
received a little closure in the end
well
no they actually did not
at counting this film has it all if
you’re looking for everything terrible
in cinema
seven hundred and thirty seven thousand
eight hundred and ninety nine number
seven
Dracula dead and loving it Count Dracula
I’m sorry my dear but you have such a
lovely reciprocal mobility even legends
make a few mistakes right and for your
miserable performance you will receive
no tip
who knows what Mel Brooks was thinking
when he made this comedy and maybe
there’s a reason he hasn’t directed a
film since I have been to many many
takings you have to know to understand
you know everything in life is location
location okay with humor perfect for
your grandma or grandpa Dracula dead and
loving it builds off classic themes of
the genre with painfully awkward
performances including one by Brooks
himself as van Helsing hello I am still
standing professor van Helsing outdated
and dead on arrival this flick has no
tick she’s almost dead she’s dead enough
number six Vampire Academy damn back to
the Vampire Academy as the daughter of
Back to the Future actress Lea Thompson
Zoe Deutsch was blessed with beauty and
brains but this young adult film had
viewers dreaming of a time machine
headed for a better movie having that
dream wasn’t a dream as a half-human
half-vampire
Rose Hathaway trains to protect her own
but the style and tone of Vampire
Academy failed to connect with younger
viewers or the entire world for that
matter
please don’t say Vampire Academy I find
the time to be quite you set someone on
fire it’s horrible in the most hilarious
of ways a film with potential but unsure
how to use it yeah I want you to say all
those things good night all
number five Abraham Lincoln vampire
hunter Abraham Lincoln as proof that
Hollywood will do absolutely anything to
make a few bucks this adaptation of Seth
grahame-smith snarl effectively shook
the grave of a US president for whatever
else I am a husband lawyer a president
she’ll always think of myself as a man
who struggled against darkness Abraham
Lincoln vampire hunter portrayed a world
in which Honest Abe had more problems
than we could imagine and ultimately
Confused the minds of young history
students I thought you were an honest
man really a stand-up comic starred in
the title role for crying out loud and
we all know that Lincoln most likely
would have preferred Brad Pitt you
weren’t ready to know what you were a
vampire the vampire hunter rode the
railroad into more Beckman bet Huff’s
film but it was the film itself that was
a symbolic trainwreck
number four the Twilight franchise you
really should have figured that out a
little earlier love them or hate them
every single one of the Twilight films
is factually horrible what does that
mean
this information may disturb millions of
loyal fans but if you’re moved to tears
by the story of Bella Edward and Jacob
then you probably need to watch more
films I’m just gonna be around for a
long time isn’t she very long time sure
the vampire stories made a gazillion
dollars but the relentless assault on
innocent moviegoers caused unwanted
stress and even a fear of cinema for
some why did you hate me so much when we
met we need vampire movies that inspire
not films that take over the
subconscious minds of our world’s
children it’s not too late to change
your mind what no you’re having second
thoughts you are number three vampires
suck your beloved Edward isn’t here to
save you speaking of cultural influence
a group of actual human beings once
decided that this film had to be made
riding on the tail of the Twilight
phenomenon Vampires Suck made fun of
brutal genre films while simultaneously
adding to the collection see what you
want about them but they do know how to
party
with lame pop cultural references and
mediocre performances this movie
quadrupled its budget in profits which
speaks volumes about the current state
of cinema
I got skilled rich 82 minutes too long
Vampires Suck is a modern meta disaster
stop you’re going to hurt yourself
number two vampire in Brooklyn there’s a
killer on the loose it’s hard to tell a
celebrity no am i right
fresh off the heels of Beverly Hills Cop
3 Annie Murphy decided it was a good
career choice to star in Wes Craven’s
tale of Big Apple bloodsuckers a woman
smiles so lovely it could brighten the
darkest night edited by the director of
our number 8 entry vampire in Brooklyn
was actually written by Eddie Murphy and
allowed him to show off his comedic
versatility with several roles that was
my phone no no that was my fault I
apologize that friend was drunk that way
in perhaps the biggest slam from critics
Roger Ebert once noted well the movie is
unpleasant to look at and my overall
memory of it is people screaming in the
shadows vampire failed there’s nothing
wrong with being just a little crazy
before we unveil our top pick here are a
few honorable mentions
you had him every night in your dreams
you never gave in Cher
I took you
staring into the all-consuming void the
dark shadows of one’s soul is heavy
hey vampire
I know you can hear me because I could
hear you
number one blood rain this is the work
of a young vampire out-of-control
blood rage directed by Eva bull enough
said that’s ridiculous
oh you need more well the legendary Ben
Kingsley said it best quote prepare to
witness the beginning of a new era a
start night prepare to witness the
beginning of a new era as the vampire
film destined to become the worst of its
kind
blood rain changed the video game it was
based on and introduced a new kind of
awful can I see your teeth
Christina Logan starred in this slasher
video game adaptation as a mixed-breed
vampire out for vengeance finally we
agree on something
with a rather talented ensemble that
agreed to be dressed in ridiculous garb
one has to question this film’s very
existence and whether the entire
production was part of some conspiracy
hungry bitch we need answers meat loaf
to life do you agree with our list oh my
god we won what’s your favorite worst
vampire movie
well I don’t want to talk about that
it’s not fair I was drunk
for more mind-blowing top 10s published
every day be sure to subscribe to
watchmojo.com
you’re being so foolish you’ve been
lying to us
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