
he may not be the brightest guy in
Springfield but he sure has a way with
words
welcome to watchmojo.com and today we’re
counting down our picks for the top 10
funniest Homer Simpson quotes you’ll
have to speak up I’m wearing a toe
before we begin we publish new videos
every day
so be sure to subscribe for more great
content for this list we’re looking at
the funniest most quotable things that
donut loving cartoon patriarch has said
throughout the Simpsons extremely long
run on TV we will however be excluding
recurring catchphrases so don’t expect
to be hearing don’t hear number 10 you
don’t win friends with salad I’m trying
to impress people here Lisa
you don’t win friends with salad when
Lisa decides to become a vegetarian she
meets with resistance from pretty much
everyone in town especially her meat
loving dad I can’t you poor little lamb
when she suggests that he not served
meat at a barbecue he was planning yeah
can’t you have some other kind of party
one way you don’t serve meat Homer
laughs off the suggestion and neatly
sums up the then-current thinking on the
social Impractical ‘ti of not eating or
serving meat the quotes so catchy that
Bart even turns it into a mini musical
number which the whole family takes
pardon except of course for Lisa
number nine stupider like a fox Homer is
a proud man one who’s prone to arguing
and unafraid of conflict when the
situation calls for it he isn’t above
busting out some old idioms to come
across as tough unfortunately he rarely
gets these time-honored expressions
right and without taking time to think
of how they apply to a situation the
resulting quotes are often comedic gold
you must be stupider than you look
stupider like bucks in an attempt to
one-up the Shelbyville junkyard owner
whose son has stolen the Springfield
lemon tree Homer delivers this doozy of
a quote completely oblivious to the fact
that he has in fact reinforced what his
adversary has said and
done so with gusto now if you’ll excuse
me all this talk has made me hungry
number eight five days but I’m mad now
surely you can’t put a price on your
family’s lives I wouldn’t touch so
either but here we are one of the
strengths of The Simpsons is the show’s
ability to address complex social issues
and boil them down to simple yet
hilarious concepts and statements you
did there peace of mind and peace of
mind is what you shall have elected by
your deadliest gun please
in a season 9 episode Homer thinks he
needs to buy a gun to protect his family
whoa careful there Annie Oakley I got a
gun
after a funny exchange with the gun
store owner in which he pretty
succinctly proves that he isn’t
responsible enough to own a firearm
Homer reaffirms his impatience with this
hilarious line we’ve got to run a
background check yes but I met no
expressing his desires without second
thought Omar unintentionally hammers
home the very thing that makes
government mandated waiting periods so
important anyone who wants a gun
immediately really shouldn’t get one I
have a gun
it’s in the Constitution number seven
I’m normally not a praying man but if
you’re up there please save me Superman
normally but if you’re up there please
save me this quote from a season 9
episode in which Lisa goes missing and
Homer tries to find her is a clever fake
out on the part of the writers we start
to think that Homer who is in quite a
predicament is going to go out of
character and he does stupid wrists are
what make life worth living for a moment
he actually starts to pray but then he
turns back into the same pop culture
influenced and hilarious Homer we all
quote and love by invoking Superman as
his Savior in a scene that’s also
reminiscent of one in Superman too
number six weaseling out of things is
important to learn it’s what separates
us from the animals
except the weasel stupid poetic justice
this season five quote really shows how
homers thought process works after Bart
joins the junior campers in a sugar
induced haze and wants to renege on his
promise homers well-intentioned parental
instincts kick in and he gives what he
thinks is sound advice weaseling other
things is important to learn it’s what
separates us from the animals
JEP the weasel well he doesn’t realize
the obvious moral flaw he does see the
logical one and adds an addendum to a
statement it’s this kind of well-meaning
oblivious confidence that makes us love
Homer and makes this quote so funny
[Music]
number five release the dogs or the bees
are the dogs with these in their mouths
and when they bark they shoot bees at
you yeah I suggest you leave immediately
when you’re rich boss takes your son as
his own a father only has one choice go
get him or what you’ll release the dogs
or the bees or the dogs with bees in
their mouths and when they park their
cute bees at you this gem of a line from
Homer was the perfect sarcastic response
to what he and all of us watching
suspected would be mr. Burnes reaction
to Homer’s rescue attempts since
ordering Smithers to release the hounds
is what the evil billionaire generally
does when visited by an unwelcome guest
homers assumption that Burns would take
it to the next level in this scenario
was a fair one but ultimately incorrect
in a cold move burns and Smithers simply
close the door on the desperate father’s
face an outcome that no one saw coming
number four first you get the sugar then
you get the power then you get the women
strong mice protectively this famous
Homer Simpson quote is actually a
tribute to another pop-culture icon when
Homer hopes for a big score and the
sugar racket and Marge is worried about
him Homer defends himself by delivering
a variation of a line said by Al
Pacino’s Tony Montana in the film
Scarface then way to get the money you
get a pow
are we gonna power manual of course
Montana was talking about money which
the gangster made selling a different
white powdery substance but the omage is
clear in a testament to homers influence
though over the years his funny version
became just as iconic as the original
first to get their sugar then you’ll get
the power then you’ll get women number
three I am so smart SMRT I mean Smar t
only here are the responses from the
college’s you applied to don’t leave it
to Homer and is frequently unwarranted
boasting to make an unintentionally
hilarious statement on how we view
education particularly how we prioritize
a piece of paper over actual knowledge
when the Simpson family patriarch is
headed back to college to complete a
nuclear physics course he’s so excited
that he lights his high school diploma
on fire a fire that spreads to the wall
it hangs on Oh while singing about how
smart he is he of course doesn’t quite
get the spelling right hey I mean ma RT
the fact that the line is actually a
mistake made by homers voice actor dan
Castellaneta that was left in only makes
it more funny number two kids you tried
your best and you failed miserably the
lesson is never try when Homer is having
a great time laughing at his kids
misfortunes those of Bart in particular
completely ignoring the fact that he’s
the one who put them in the situation in
the first place Marge interrupts with a
suggestion something you’d like to say
she remarks to her husband that perhaps
this would be a good time for some words
of reassuring wisdom what she Bart Lisa
and the audience get instead is a
classic Homer line kids you tried your
best and you failed miserably the lesson
is never try true to his character
it starts off typically before taking a
serious left turn to make it downright
terrible parenting
it sure is funny before we unveil our
number one tick here are some honorable
mentions Pisa if you don’t like your job
you don’t strike you just go in every
day and do it really half-assed that’s
the American Way no operator give me the
number for 911 stupid sexy Flanders
number one to alcohol the cause of and
solution to all of life’s problems now
don’t say that oka Hall is a way of life
alcohol is my way of life and I aim to
keep it
it’s a one-line statement that perfectly
sums up not only his character but also
the ambiguous moral lesson of this
classic episode when Springfield bans
alcohol and then reverses its decision
thanks to Homer temporarily becoming a
prohibition-era beer Baron the town
celebrates with the booze that the mob
is able to provide so quickly you’re out
there somewhere beer Baron and I’ll find
you instead of moralizing Homer delivers
an episode closing line that’s as
passionate as it is matter of fact
neutral and depressingly honest though
it may be a bleak outlook on life it
sure makes for a hilariously quotable
line the causal and solution to all of
life’s problems do you agree with our
picks check out these other great clips
from WatchMojo and subscribe for new
videos every day
[Music]
Springfield but he sure has a way with
words
welcome to watchmojo.com and today we’re
counting down our picks for the top 10
funniest Homer Simpson quotes you’ll
have to speak up I’m wearing a toe
before we begin we publish new videos
every day
so be sure to subscribe for more great
content for this list we’re looking at
the funniest most quotable things that
donut loving cartoon patriarch has said
throughout the Simpsons extremely long
run on TV we will however be excluding
recurring catchphrases so don’t expect
to be hearing don’t hear number 10 you
don’t win friends with salad I’m trying
to impress people here Lisa
you don’t win friends with salad when
Lisa decides to become a vegetarian she
meets with resistance from pretty much
everyone in town especially her meat
loving dad I can’t you poor little lamb
when she suggests that he not served
meat at a barbecue he was planning yeah
can’t you have some other kind of party
one way you don’t serve meat Homer
laughs off the suggestion and neatly
sums up the then-current thinking on the
social Impractical ‘ti of not eating or
serving meat the quotes so catchy that
Bart even turns it into a mini musical
number which the whole family takes
pardon except of course for Lisa
number nine stupider like a fox Homer is
a proud man one who’s prone to arguing
and unafraid of conflict when the
situation calls for it he isn’t above
busting out some old idioms to come
across as tough unfortunately he rarely
gets these time-honored expressions
right and without taking time to think
of how they apply to a situation the
resulting quotes are often comedic gold
you must be stupider than you look
stupider like bucks in an attempt to
one-up the Shelbyville junkyard owner
whose son has stolen the Springfield
lemon tree Homer delivers this doozy of
a quote completely oblivious to the fact
that he has in fact reinforced what his
adversary has said and
done so with gusto now if you’ll excuse
me all this talk has made me hungry
number eight five days but I’m mad now
surely you can’t put a price on your
family’s lives I wouldn’t touch so
either but here we are one of the
strengths of The Simpsons is the show’s
ability to address complex social issues
and boil them down to simple yet
hilarious concepts and statements you
did there peace of mind and peace of
mind is what you shall have elected by
your deadliest gun please
in a season 9 episode Homer thinks he
needs to buy a gun to protect his family
whoa careful there Annie Oakley I got a
gun
after a funny exchange with the gun
store owner in which he pretty
succinctly proves that he isn’t
responsible enough to own a firearm
Homer reaffirms his impatience with this
hilarious line we’ve got to run a
background check yes but I met no
expressing his desires without second
thought Omar unintentionally hammers
home the very thing that makes
government mandated waiting periods so
important anyone who wants a gun
immediately really shouldn’t get one I
have a gun
it’s in the Constitution number seven
I’m normally not a praying man but if
you’re up there please save me Superman
normally but if you’re up there please
save me this quote from a season 9
episode in which Lisa goes missing and
Homer tries to find her is a clever fake
out on the part of the writers we start
to think that Homer who is in quite a
predicament is going to go out of
character and he does stupid wrists are
what make life worth living for a moment
he actually starts to pray but then he
turns back into the same pop culture
influenced and hilarious Homer we all
quote and love by invoking Superman as
his Savior in a scene that’s also
reminiscent of one in Superman too
number six weaseling out of things is
important to learn it’s what separates
us from the animals
except the weasel stupid poetic justice
this season five quote really shows how
homers thought process works after Bart
joins the junior campers in a sugar
induced haze and wants to renege on his
promise homers well-intentioned parental
instincts kick in and he gives what he
thinks is sound advice weaseling other
things is important to learn it’s what
separates us from the animals
JEP the weasel well he doesn’t realize
the obvious moral flaw he does see the
logical one and adds an addendum to a
statement it’s this kind of well-meaning
oblivious confidence that makes us love
Homer and makes this quote so funny
[Music]
number five release the dogs or the bees
are the dogs with these in their mouths
and when they bark they shoot bees at
you yeah I suggest you leave immediately
when you’re rich boss takes your son as
his own a father only has one choice go
get him or what you’ll release the dogs
or the bees or the dogs with bees in
their mouths and when they park their
cute bees at you this gem of a line from
Homer was the perfect sarcastic response
to what he and all of us watching
suspected would be mr. Burnes reaction
to Homer’s rescue attempts since
ordering Smithers to release the hounds
is what the evil billionaire generally
does when visited by an unwelcome guest
homers assumption that Burns would take
it to the next level in this scenario
was a fair one but ultimately incorrect
in a cold move burns and Smithers simply
close the door on the desperate father’s
face an outcome that no one saw coming
number four first you get the sugar then
you get the power then you get the women
strong mice protectively this famous
Homer Simpson quote is actually a
tribute to another pop-culture icon when
Homer hopes for a big score and the
sugar racket and Marge is worried about
him Homer defends himself by delivering
a variation of a line said by Al
Pacino’s Tony Montana in the film
Scarface then way to get the money you
get a pow
are we gonna power manual of course
Montana was talking about money which
the gangster made selling a different
white powdery substance but the omage is
clear in a testament to homers influence
though over the years his funny version
became just as iconic as the original
first to get their sugar then you’ll get
the power then you’ll get women number
three I am so smart SMRT I mean Smar t
only here are the responses from the
college’s you applied to don’t leave it
to Homer and is frequently unwarranted
boasting to make an unintentionally
hilarious statement on how we view
education particularly how we prioritize
a piece of paper over actual knowledge
when the Simpson family patriarch is
headed back to college to complete a
nuclear physics course he’s so excited
that he lights his high school diploma
on fire a fire that spreads to the wall
it hangs on Oh while singing about how
smart he is he of course doesn’t quite
get the spelling right hey I mean ma RT
the fact that the line is actually a
mistake made by homers voice actor dan
Castellaneta that was left in only makes
it more funny number two kids you tried
your best and you failed miserably the
lesson is never try when Homer is having
a great time laughing at his kids
misfortunes those of Bart in particular
completely ignoring the fact that he’s
the one who put them in the situation in
the first place Marge interrupts with a
suggestion something you’d like to say
she remarks to her husband that perhaps
this would be a good time for some words
of reassuring wisdom what she Bart Lisa
and the audience get instead is a
classic Homer line kids you tried your
best and you failed miserably the lesson
is never try true to his character
it starts off typically before taking a
serious left turn to make it downright
terrible parenting
it sure is funny before we unveil our
number one tick here are some honorable
mentions Pisa if you don’t like your job
you don’t strike you just go in every
day and do it really half-assed that’s
the American Way no operator give me the
number for 911 stupid sexy Flanders
number one to alcohol the cause of and
solution to all of life’s problems now
don’t say that oka Hall is a way of life
alcohol is my way of life and I aim to
keep it
it’s a one-line statement that perfectly
sums up not only his character but also
the ambiguous moral lesson of this
classic episode when Springfield bans
alcohol and then reverses its decision
thanks to Homer temporarily becoming a
prohibition-era beer Baron the town
celebrates with the booze that the mob
is able to provide so quickly you’re out
there somewhere beer Baron and I’ll find
you instead of moralizing Homer delivers
an episode closing line that’s as
passionate as it is matter of fact
neutral and depressingly honest though
it may be a bleak outlook on life it
sure makes for a hilariously quotable
line the causal and solution to all of
life’s problems do you agree with our
picks check out these other great clips
from WatchMojo and subscribe for new
videos every day
[Music]
Please follow and like us: