penis assault a cloning mega factory and
Seagal training that’s illegal in some
states you know just because you don’t
need to know about these stories doesn’t
mean they won’t interest you
uh-huh prove it welcome to watchmojo.com
and this is the dispatch where we give
you three cool funny or weird news
stories from the previous week of human
existence so bow to your sensei and
let’s get started
number three use your head with the
brain in it keep that dirty dick in your
pants as more and more details of an
angry outburst last month in the
andalucian football 2nd division are
exposed the worse it gets so here’s the
setting a match between C D Abbas and
gappiya FC and we’re at the 80 minute
mark a player named Ruben Gomez
Bustamante who won was suspended for
yellow card accumulation and two plays
for neither of the teams on the field
takes exception to a call and storms the
pitch p.m. buttons his tracksuit bottoms
and attempts to slap the female
assistant referee with his penis
clearly ignoring the text on every
referee sleeve it’s disgusting and
demeaning following the cocky conjecture
gomez Bustamante was banned for one year
by his club Celtic to pollyannas
immediately and a 468 euro fine was
thrust in his direction I guess we can
look forward to a year of bathroom
selfies from this gym
first let me take a selfie number two
the Clone Wars China yes a clone army
and I must say one of the finest we’ve
ever created it’s been done with monkeys
sheep cows and maybe even the woolly
mammoths but this week may have crossed
that line in history where human cloning
actually becomes a reality
China’s boyalife group are currently
building a cloning super plant on Kamino
I mean Tianjin China where over the
course of the next five years they hope
to have phone one million cows according
to chief executive Zhu Zi out soon they
possess technology advanced enough to
clone humans as well but they are
reluctant to begin production citing
possible adverse reactions the Senate
will never approve the use of clones
elaborating further with the cool scary
technology Zhu says that human cloning
could challenge the 50/50 split in DNA
created through the standard birthing
practice instead now we could choose to
have 100% of the genes from one parent
or the other or a mix of both can you
imagine at 100 cent Donald DNA mini
trump clone thank you know what a time
to be alive I’d like China I just sold
an apartment for 15 million dollars to
somebody from China
number one flock of seagulls we’ve seen
him kicked Soviet butt on the silver
screen and now it’s time for him to give
back a little
no American action here of Steven Seagal
made a name for himself in Hollywood
using his own brand of the Japanese
martial art Aikido and now the Serbian
government wants a piece
during a three-day stay in belgrade
serbia this week Segal was offered a job
training Serbian Special Forces in
martial arts kind of babbling bullshit
is this sure to come in handy if the
forces ever need to jump majestically
onto a moving train strangle a baddie
from the roof of a station wagon or find
themselves bringing a knife to a
gunfight now 63 years old Seagal is one
of a few Hollywood personalities that
has beloved in the Balkan state awarded
to Belgrade mayor city Somali the
Serbian people were eager to have the
seventh dan black belt back on their
soil but Seagal is yet to respond to the
job offer no I want you to my little bag
of tricks so did the penis assailant
deserve harsher punishment a sharp in a
dick if you want to suggest a story or
just talk about Dan’s hand gestures get
involved by tweeting us at the dispatch
Wm
and for your weekly dispatch of offbeat
news stories and top ten lists published
every day be sure to subscribe to
watchmojo.com it’s a family recipe you
got it buddy
you
Seagal training that’s illegal in some
states you know just because you don’t
need to know about these stories doesn’t
mean they won’t interest you
uh-huh prove it welcome to watchmojo.com
and this is the dispatch where we give
you three cool funny or weird news
stories from the previous week of human
existence so bow to your sensei and
let’s get started
number three use your head with the
brain in it keep that dirty dick in your
pants as more and more details of an
angry outburst last month in the
andalucian football 2nd division are
exposed the worse it gets so here’s the
setting a match between C D Abbas and
gappiya FC and we’re at the 80 minute
mark a player named Ruben Gomez
Bustamante who won was suspended for
yellow card accumulation and two plays
for neither of the teams on the field
takes exception to a call and storms the
pitch p.m. buttons his tracksuit bottoms
and attempts to slap the female
assistant referee with his penis
clearly ignoring the text on every
referee sleeve it’s disgusting and
demeaning following the cocky conjecture
gomez Bustamante was banned for one year
by his club Celtic to pollyannas
immediately and a 468 euro fine was
thrust in his direction I guess we can
look forward to a year of bathroom
selfies from this gym
first let me take a selfie number two
the Clone Wars China yes a clone army
and I must say one of the finest we’ve
ever created it’s been done with monkeys
sheep cows and maybe even the woolly
mammoths but this week may have crossed
that line in history where human cloning
actually becomes a reality
China’s boyalife group are currently
building a cloning super plant on Kamino
I mean Tianjin China where over the
course of the next five years they hope
to have phone one million cows according
to chief executive Zhu Zi out soon they
possess technology advanced enough to
clone humans as well but they are
reluctant to begin production citing
possible adverse reactions the Senate
will never approve the use of clones
elaborating further with the cool scary
technology Zhu says that human cloning
could challenge the 50/50 split in DNA
created through the standard birthing
practice instead now we could choose to
have 100% of the genes from one parent
or the other or a mix of both can you
imagine at 100 cent Donald DNA mini
trump clone thank you know what a time
to be alive I’d like China I just sold
an apartment for 15 million dollars to
somebody from China
number one flock of seagulls we’ve seen
him kicked Soviet butt on the silver
screen and now it’s time for him to give
back a little
no American action here of Steven Seagal
made a name for himself in Hollywood
using his own brand of the Japanese
martial art Aikido and now the Serbian
government wants a piece
during a three-day stay in belgrade
serbia this week Segal was offered a job
training Serbian Special Forces in
martial arts kind of babbling bullshit
is this sure to come in handy if the
forces ever need to jump majestically
onto a moving train strangle a baddie
from the roof of a station wagon or find
themselves bringing a knife to a
gunfight now 63 years old Seagal is one
of a few Hollywood personalities that
has beloved in the Balkan state awarded
to Belgrade mayor city Somali the
Serbian people were eager to have the
seventh dan black belt back on their
soil but Seagal is yet to respond to the
job offer no I want you to my little bag
of tricks so did the penis assailant
deserve harsher punishment a sharp in a
dick if you want to suggest a story or
just talk about Dan’s hand gestures get
involved by tweeting us at the dispatch
Wm
and for your weekly dispatch of offbeat
news stories and top ten lists published
every day be sure to subscribe to
watchmojo.com it’s a family recipe you
got it buddy
you
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