these have been crazy times I don’t have
to tell anybody here about that we this
year in particular have lived with a lot
of violent thoughts a lot of violent
words a lot of violent deeds and let’s
be clear about this these issues of
gender and class and race are not new
issues for us in America they have been
part and parcel of our experience think
segregation think slavery think the
inability of poor white men to vote so
as we ponder a lot of issues that we are
currently thinking about a few weeks ago
I have a great opportunity to talk to a
friend of mine who has been in the peace
and justice movement for seventy years
a colleague of Martin Luther King so I
asked him I said tell me from your
perspective where are we right now what
do you think and he said something
really really interesting to me he said
you know what I think is that the grand
experiment in democracy that was started
in 1775 is still continuing yes
it is messy it is fragile it is
difficult but it’s continuing this push
for inclusion is continuing I thought
that was really powerful he said
something else that I thought was
interesting he said that in order for us
to have a really peaceful society we
needed to have more women at the table
we needed balance between men and women
in the world in their level of influence
and I thought that was also very
interesting so before I begin to talk
about these aspects of how we were able
to harness our lives as women I want to
ask you to give me a show of hands how
many people here have ever felt like I’m
not good enough how many people is that
I’m really not smart enough how many
people that I’m really not capable
enough I see a lots of hands
minor up as well I say this because I
want to share with you something that I
got from Maya Angelou and I know she
would want me to share it with you I had
the opportunity to be with her for just
one evening and she said something
really profound she said we are all
brilliant enough we are all brilliant
enough so that’s where I want to start
first because I think as people and as
women in particular we have to first
start with appreciating ourselves moving
on to appreciating our circle around us
and then appreciating the world around
us so my first experience with somebody
who empowered herself was with my
grandmother my grandmother Laura Rea
young lived in Kentucky in a segregated
timer most of her life was spent in
segregation and she married my
grandfather who served in a segregated
army she had a son who served in a
segregated army now you want to talk
about anger these days I don’t see how
she dealt with her anger to know that
the men in her life were willing to give
up their lives for this country and yet
to eat at the diner down
how do you do that and yet she lived
this world with dignity one quick story
when my mother and her sister were girls
they went into the small town of
simpsonville Kentucky about two miles
from where the family home was and there
were two signs one said colored women
the other said white ladies now my
grandmother was very dignified held
herself high and so she said to her
girls well girls we are ladies aren’t we
so let’s go to the white lady’s room you
know this was a very powerful message
because she had to empower herself in
this very difficult world that she lived
in but the power I think serves me to
this day I think I serve everybody
because no matter what to be able to
live with dignity to not let the
circumstances drag you so low is really
really important then I think the whole
idea of being able to respect the people
that are in our circle maybe it’s the
guy who brings us our groceries or
somebody we’ve met very casually at a
friend’s house or our spouse and I think
you’ll find correct me if I’m wrong but
it’s very easy to judge the people who
are closest to us right I’m people
shaking their heads right because you
know there’s something like well we know
we don’t like what they’re thinking you
know that kind of thing where we
separate ourselves and that separation
can become really dangerous because
we’re isolating ourselves I’ll give you
my personal example I was working in New
York at NBC and I had done a program and
my boss at the time was really kind of
against the tenor of this program and we
were like voting for the good guys and
he was voting for the bad guys I felt so
I was really angry and I thought you
know what’s wrong with
and at the time I decided I would get a
little help to give me some insight and
so the woman I talked to a mentor of
mine said she said you know what Bonnie
you’re right you’re absolutely right she
said but you need to get close to him
close to him what is she talking about
how can I get costume he’s wrong but I
began to think about it and I began to
realize that he was responding to me the
way I felt about him that I if I heart
really Democrat at him as a human being
which is very different than agreeing
with what he said I didn’t agree with
what he said but I still had this
feeling of denigration and I vowed right
then and there that I would not be the
kind of person that would do that to
anybody and so the next day I walked
into his office and he said you know I
just wanted to communicate with you and
on the scale of 1 to 10 you’re at 12
this was a complete transformation for
me because I had to switch how I was
feeling inside and once I did that then
his response to me is so very very
different now in terms of creating
community learning how to build
community
I think women have particular assets
that are well equipped for that I think
we do tend to you know protect the nest
if you want I want to see from the hands
of women here in particular how many of
you have gone to a party for example
with a male counterpart and you come
back from that event together with your
male counterpart and you guys had
totally different experiences in that
room how many people do okay right right
because he gave me a bed their whole
evening and he is not giving would you
have picked up in the first 5 10 minutes
am i right right exactly right because
in 5 to 10 minutes you have figured out
from you’re scoping out the situation
what the dynamics are emotionally of
people right yes right and he thought
he’s just not there so these are skill
sets which scientist
actually think we do have we read
emotions our peripheral vision is
greater right and now as we are entering
the workforce and also as the economies
are changing into a more collaborative
form an innovation form we can use these
skills and all that’s great we need to
do more of it we need more women at the
table to create this but I want to say
one thing further it’s so important and
that is what is our relationship to our
global community can we strengthen the
bonds between us and people that live in
other countries because I think at the
end of the day our capacity to love
other people’s children as our own is a
thing that is going to save us all I
know as the mother of two sons how
passionate a mother’s love can be but
that passion cannot end with my own
children it is not okay for children in
Syria to be eating leaves it is not okay
for countless generations of children in
Africa to have no nothing else but war
we cannot say we have victory if these
things are continuing on our watch and I
believe that if we can look in the faces
of children whether they’re from Kosovo
or Kansas from Tehran to Tennessee if we
can look in those faces and see the
faces of our children we will know what
to do we will take the right action so
what is the time we are in Martin Luther
King said procrastination is the thief
of time today is tomorrow so the time is
on our watch what are we going to do I
say the time is now we know what to do
we have it in our hearts and we have it
in our capabilities we can start in this
room in the sound of my voice to take
responsibility
for the burden of knowing when we love
other people’s children as though they
were our own it’ll be the time to do
what is right thank you
[Music]
[Applause]
to tell anybody here about that we this
year in particular have lived with a lot
of violent thoughts a lot of violent
words a lot of violent deeds and let’s
be clear about this these issues of
gender and class and race are not new
issues for us in America they have been
part and parcel of our experience think
segregation think slavery think the
inability of poor white men to vote so
as we ponder a lot of issues that we are
currently thinking about a few weeks ago
I have a great opportunity to talk to a
friend of mine who has been in the peace
and justice movement for seventy years
a colleague of Martin Luther King so I
asked him I said tell me from your
perspective where are we right now what
do you think and he said something
really really interesting to me he said
you know what I think is that the grand
experiment in democracy that was started
in 1775 is still continuing yes
it is messy it is fragile it is
difficult but it’s continuing this push
for inclusion is continuing I thought
that was really powerful he said
something else that I thought was
interesting he said that in order for us
to have a really peaceful society we
needed to have more women at the table
we needed balance between men and women
in the world in their level of influence
and I thought that was also very
interesting so before I begin to talk
about these aspects of how we were able
to harness our lives as women I want to
ask you to give me a show of hands how
many people here have ever felt like I’m
not good enough how many people is that
I’m really not smart enough how many
people that I’m really not capable
enough I see a lots of hands
minor up as well I say this because I
want to share with you something that I
got from Maya Angelou and I know she
would want me to share it with you I had
the opportunity to be with her for just
one evening and she said something
really profound she said we are all
brilliant enough we are all brilliant
enough so that’s where I want to start
first because I think as people and as
women in particular we have to first
start with appreciating ourselves moving
on to appreciating our circle around us
and then appreciating the world around
us so my first experience with somebody
who empowered herself was with my
grandmother my grandmother Laura Rea
young lived in Kentucky in a segregated
timer most of her life was spent in
segregation and she married my
grandfather who served in a segregated
army she had a son who served in a
segregated army now you want to talk
about anger these days I don’t see how
she dealt with her anger to know that
the men in her life were willing to give
up their lives for this country and yet
to eat at the diner down
how do you do that and yet she lived
this world with dignity one quick story
when my mother and her sister were girls
they went into the small town of
simpsonville Kentucky about two miles
from where the family home was and there
were two signs one said colored women
the other said white ladies now my
grandmother was very dignified held
herself high and so she said to her
girls well girls we are ladies aren’t we
so let’s go to the white lady’s room you
know this was a very powerful message
because she had to empower herself in
this very difficult world that she lived
in but the power I think serves me to
this day I think I serve everybody
because no matter what to be able to
live with dignity to not let the
circumstances drag you so low is really
really important then I think the whole
idea of being able to respect the people
that are in our circle maybe it’s the
guy who brings us our groceries or
somebody we’ve met very casually at a
friend’s house or our spouse and I think
you’ll find correct me if I’m wrong but
it’s very easy to judge the people who
are closest to us right I’m people
shaking their heads right because you
know there’s something like well we know
we don’t like what they’re thinking you
know that kind of thing where we
separate ourselves and that separation
can become really dangerous because
we’re isolating ourselves I’ll give you
my personal example I was working in New
York at NBC and I had done a program and
my boss at the time was really kind of
against the tenor of this program and we
were like voting for the good guys and
he was voting for the bad guys I felt so
I was really angry and I thought you
know what’s wrong with
and at the time I decided I would get a
little help to give me some insight and
so the woman I talked to a mentor of
mine said she said you know what Bonnie
you’re right you’re absolutely right she
said but you need to get close to him
close to him what is she talking about
how can I get costume he’s wrong but I
began to think about it and I began to
realize that he was responding to me the
way I felt about him that I if I heart
really Democrat at him as a human being
which is very different than agreeing
with what he said I didn’t agree with
what he said but I still had this
feeling of denigration and I vowed right
then and there that I would not be the
kind of person that would do that to
anybody and so the next day I walked
into his office and he said you know I
just wanted to communicate with you and
on the scale of 1 to 10 you’re at 12
this was a complete transformation for
me because I had to switch how I was
feeling inside and once I did that then
his response to me is so very very
different now in terms of creating
community learning how to build
community
I think women have particular assets
that are well equipped for that I think
we do tend to you know protect the nest
if you want I want to see from the hands
of women here in particular how many of
you have gone to a party for example
with a male counterpart and you come
back from that event together with your
male counterpart and you guys had
totally different experiences in that
room how many people do okay right right
because he gave me a bed their whole
evening and he is not giving would you
have picked up in the first 5 10 minutes
am i right right exactly right because
in 5 to 10 minutes you have figured out
from you’re scoping out the situation
what the dynamics are emotionally of
people right yes right and he thought
he’s just not there so these are skill
sets which scientist
actually think we do have we read
emotions our peripheral vision is
greater right and now as we are entering
the workforce and also as the economies
are changing into a more collaborative
form an innovation form we can use these
skills and all that’s great we need to
do more of it we need more women at the
table to create this but I want to say
one thing further it’s so important and
that is what is our relationship to our
global community can we strengthen the
bonds between us and people that live in
other countries because I think at the
end of the day our capacity to love
other people’s children as our own is a
thing that is going to save us all I
know as the mother of two sons how
passionate a mother’s love can be but
that passion cannot end with my own
children it is not okay for children in
Syria to be eating leaves it is not okay
for countless generations of children in
Africa to have no nothing else but war
we cannot say we have victory if these
things are continuing on our watch and I
believe that if we can look in the faces
of children whether they’re from Kosovo
or Kansas from Tehran to Tennessee if we
can look in those faces and see the
faces of our children we will know what
to do we will take the right action so
what is the time we are in Martin Luther
King said procrastination is the thief
of time today is tomorrow so the time is
on our watch what are we going to do I
say the time is now we know what to do
we have it in our hearts and we have it
in our capabilities we can start in this
room in the sound of my voice to take
responsibility
for the burden of knowing when we love
other people’s children as though they
were our own it’ll be the time to do
what is right thank you
[Music]
[Applause]
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