studying the people language and culture
of France unexpectedly a game emerges
spot the American yes we have telltale
signs of who we are like wearing running
shoes everywhere donning a baseball cap
to block the Sun even at night and of
course the Levi’s 501 blue jeans with
the wallet in the back pocket mind you
this was 1989 no internet and Levi’s
were hard to come by in Europe and also
I can’t explain it while I’m here but
when you’re abroad you notice that
Americans take up a lot of personal
space well anyway there’s people
watching and creating stories about
people based on how they appear became
quite a hobby for me whether in shopping
malls or airports this was my favorite
pastime and who here has not done
something like this now the important
question is to turn it around and say
what are the stories that people are
making up about me this is what I do I
hope people create their visual stories
you see after 20 years of being in high
tech entertainment and sales
I had an identity crisis caused by this
yes a birth of my sweet little angel
turned my world inside out upside down
and backward my self-confidence
plummeted because I was struggling with
this new role of being a mother which in
turn affected my feelings toward my job
and my body had become this alien being
but I didn’t know how to dress anymore
and my hair was falling out and quite
frankly I was in such a rut that
embarrassingly I wore my maternity pants
for six months after my son was born
well after two years of soul searching
and researching I came across image
consulting image consultants are
professionally
and paid to help people create their
stories through verbal and nonverbal
communications this was a wake-up call
for me it also became my passion and
since 2010 I have been helping clients
create their visual stories during my
training and the experience that I’ve
had with all of my clients I have come
to call this mental process of making up
these stories something called style
profiling now style profiling what is it
well it’s not illegal and it’s not
unethical in fact it’s an effective
survival skill that we have perfected to
the point of being able to sum up
someone’s visual story within two
seconds that’s right
and the result of this process becomes
your first impression first impressions
can set you up for failure did you know
that it takes five subsequent meetings
to undo a first impression
most of us don’t even get a second
chance let alone five doesn’t it
therefore make sense to create an
intentional style profile rather than
throw caution to the wind and maybe miss
out on some real opportunities well
right about now you’re probably saying
wait a minute Thea you’re supposed to or
should I say you’re not supposed to
judge a book by its cover right well
that is idealistic but not realistic
that saying came from the mid 1800s when
life was much different than it is now
take for instance choosing a mate back
then many times you didn’t even have a
choice your family made the decision
when you were younger and there were
long courtships and negotiations
economic benefits to be considered today
over 46 million people are registered on
the online dating app tinder and they
are choosing a possible mate
based on swiping left or swiping right
on their phone and based on a digital
profile well what does that digital
profile talk about does it say your
values your goals who you are what you
say visually comes based on three
nonverbal cues wardrobe grooming and
body language think of this as your
elevator pitch but you don’t have to say
a word right so when we think about this
swiping left and swiping right we say
well what about the evidence well the
evidence is there if we talk about dr.
Daniel Hamer mesh who used to be an
economics professor here at UT he went
on a series of studies to prove that we
succeed in life based on merit skills
and of course drive well after he got
the results of all these international
studies together he found that the
results were so profound that he decided
to write a book about it
Beauty pays that’s right dr. Hamer mesh
actually proved the opposite of what he
set out to prove in fact he found that
appearance affects everything from
landing a job getting a promotion pay
raises to finding the best spouses even
to negotiating terms of a loan fashion
model Cameron Russell furthers this
statement in hurts headaches talk where
she says she won the genetic lottery
when asked how she succeeds in her
business or how she came to be
successful she says it’s because she was
born with this amazing group of Beauty
traits that society holds dear such as
she’s tall she’s lean
she’s white and I’m gonna throw out
there she’s young well given all this
evidence all of this idea of beauty
based success seems pretty superficial
and to most of us it seems pretty
hopeless doesn’t it the number one way
that I have found to combat this idea of
beauty based success is through
intentional style profiling and the
farther away we are from the these ideal
traits the more important that the
intentional style profiling comes into
play fortunately style profiling is
something that we can mold and work with
and we’re gonna talk about three ways to
do that the first being turning your
objectives into visual cues all right so
let’s take the example of a job
interview and you are a hiring manager
and you would like to hire somebody who
has two traits the first paying strict
attention to detail and the second being
an aggressive negotiator candidate a
walks in well her outfits a little
disheveled and the nail polish is
chipped and the hair maybe hasn’t been
washed in a while does this look like
somebody who pays attention to detail
candidate B walks in and he’s shuffling
in poor posture handshake not so great I
contact down to the floor does this tell
you that this is a person who’s an
aggressive negotiator you see it doesn’t
matter what you say on your resume or do
or talked about in the interview people
are going to remember if your visual
message lines up with what you’re saying
and doing and if it doesn’t the visual
message will most likely last
let’s talk about another way that we can
mold our style profile
never underestimate commonalities that
resonate with other people you know our
style profile can say a lot about us it
can say our political affiliations it
can talk about our heritage or our
religious beliefs it can talk about our
allegiances there you go it can talk
about our societal role or rank it can
even speak to how much money we have so
let’s get back to the idea of the job
interview and this time we’re going to
switch it around and you’re the
candidate and you’re researching for
this interview and discover low and
behold the managing or should I say the
hiring manager is a big star Wars fan
and so are you this interview could be
the perfect opportunity to pull out and
wear your Star Wars Rebel Alliance lapel
pin now this may seem crazy or silly but
think about it if you go in and you have
something that resonates with them and
differentiates you from the others it
works to your advantage why because
studies show that all things considered
equal 90% of hiring managers will make
the decision based on appearance and
wouldn’t it be helpful if your
appearance resonated with that hiring
manager and by the way I think the other
10% were lying but anyway for the third
point create an authentic message that
is in line with your values your goals
your personality and even your body
architecture so it doesn’t matter how
much resonance there is with other
people you have to be true to yourself a
lot of people come into me feeling
invisible and this is no wonder or
surprise given what we just talked about
with the evidence that shows that
society wants this particular idea of
beauty and if we don’t meet those
criteria what do we end up doing we end
up trying to hide under dark colors
oversized clothing things that will
blend in with the crowd well how are we
supposed to find prosperity and
opportunity when prosperity and
opportunity can’t find us because we are
hiding one way to overcome that is to
create a signature style or choose an
item that is your signature item as part
of your style profile this is something
that makes your heart sing it can be
anything from colorful bowties to bright
red lipstick to a two-foot tall mohawk
whatever it is choose something that
makes your heart sing and that is in
line with your values your personality
and your goals and body architecture I’m
also going to suggest something a little
radical for a lot of people and that is
try trading in some of that black in
your wardrobe for color you know who you
are we often underestimate the power of
color psychology for instance the color
red it naturally speeds up the heart
rate it gets you excited that’s why it’s
a sporty color in fact it even increases
your appetite and a special hint for all
the single people out there it is a
great date night color on the opposite
end of the spectrum you might have
something like a calming serene pale
blue this is a great color to wear if
you are going into a particularly
stressful situation you also may see
this color in doctors offices or with
the waiting area of your attorney’s
office because yes it comes now I also
want to point something out in
particular to women who are working in
male-dominated
industries like high-tech I’ve been
there and I have women come into me
quite frequently saying dia if I wear a
dress or makeup to the office it works
against me
they say this because of negative
feedback that some insecure co-worker
gave to them I’m here to say please do
not hide your femininity under
sweatshirts and baggy pants because
somebody told you this is how you get to
hang with the guys
instead use other visual cues that
command the positive attention you are
looking for such as impeccable tailoring
power colors direct eye contact a strong
handshake excellent posture these are
the visuals that will leave a lasting
impression throughout your career you
are a woman and that is one of the
assets that you bring to the table at
your office okay so speaking of women in
male-dominated industries I would like
to wrap up with a story about a client
of mine named Gabby Gabby works in
software sales and quite frankly she’s
an ass-kicker I mean she’s in charge of
a huge territory in the United States
and she’s a top producer consistently
unfortunately Gabby felt that any time
they were in meetings or conferences
she was overlooked and she wanted to
change that she had a major
industry-wide conference happening in
Chicago and she wanted to make a big
statement so she came to me for help
well we analyzed her goals her values
and personality and body architecture
and came up with a plan mind you gabby
is all of five foot two and wears a size
zero so when it comes to the physical
presence guys have her beat hands down
well we considered that in her
intentional style profile
and I wished her luck sent her on her
way and she headed off to Chicago
shortly after she gave me a call and
said Thea
the conference was a huge success Gabby
said she knew immediately that something
was different why because she went into
Starbucks the men in line were offering
to buy her coffee when she went to the
conference she was offered jobs by other
employers who had never met her before
her intentional style profile opened the
door of opportunity for her and then her
skills and her personality could step in
and take over it was fabulous so again
in creating an attention and intentional
style profile think about turning your
objectives into visual cues taking
advantage of those commonalities that
resonate with others and of course still
creating an authentic message that looks
great for you and by the way for those
who are curious Gaby’s key success
factor in a sea full of Chicago
attendees wearing black Gabby wore white thank you