[Music]
okay can you hear me actually yes great
okay first of all thank you and very
warm welcome I’m here today to share
with you my story just before I do that
I want to share a fact with you 90% of
adults have at least one major regret in
their life at least one major regret I
think we can all share that we may have
more today I’m going to share with you a
model that I’ve created and followed for
the last five years and lots of what I’m
going to cover today is the first time
I’m sharing it with complete strangers a
lot of it’s just been with me and my
close family so transformation and me
just a bit about me before I begin I’m
currently a senior lecturer in
management and I teach some fantastic
people not only do I teach them they
also teach me as well one thing I’ve
learned organizations nationally
internationally constantly evolving and
changing they’re having to change all
the time and that’s because of external
and internal factors these could be
things like competition market changes
government pressures the same idea I’ve
applied to myself think about moments in
your life ladies and gentlemen where
you’ve been challenged and you’ve had to
do things differently were you prepared
for those challenges what did you do
what I’m not teaching I’m also during
the night a volunteer police inspector
so I manage and lead 25 volunteer police
officers in the West Midlands and I’m
very proud and honored to do that the
person I am today is because of the
journey that I’ve been on I not a
completed product yet but I want to
share with you some of the highlights
along the way one of my biggest
highlights
this little man oh that’s Arjun Arjun is
one years old just celebrated his first
birthday over Christmas Arjun is
somebody who came into our lives and
completely changed my life completely
and parents in the room will know what
I’m talking about and grandparents too
before Arjun came I had a life of
freedom I could go out when I wanted I
could go to parties I could go to
restaurants I could come home when I
wanted the moment the nurse handed me
this beautiful boy
I realized that’s all about to change
suddenly responsibility was thrust upon
me and that’s when I realized I was not
prepared for this moment in my life I
mentally and physically was not prepared
for the journey that was about to begin
and that’s with the responsibility of
being a father so with that in mind what
I did was I created a change model now
this change model is a model of that
first to look to organizations and how
they change but I realized actually
those key elements we can apply to
ourselves and I want to share that story
with you today you are my first audience
so I’m going to share this with there’s
six key components the first one when I
was at school like many of us our
teachers would say what do you want to
be when you grow up what job do you want
to do what type of life do you want to
have and we had an image when we were
young that could have been an astronaut
or a sportsman that could have been a
gardener for some florists for others
something for a lot of people has
changed along the way they’ve lost
clarity vision what has changed for you
as you sit there today do you feel you
have fulfilled everything you wanted to
do
are there still things yet for you to do
you’ve lost your way a little bit
clarity regained that focus identify
what was at the heart of what you wanted
to do whether it’s a job or whether it’s
something personal to you whether it’s
something professional as well and bring
that back to you re clarify what is it
you want to do what is your purpose your
drive the second one is communication
ladies and gents I want to share how
many people in the room we’ve got one of
these and what would happen if your
phone disappeared how would you feel I
can hear the sigh in the room exactly if
we cannot live without our phones the
way we communicate with each other has
changed I’d I teach students who no
longer want to talk to each other but
they’d much prefer to take photos of
each other and put it on snapchat and
Instagram we no longer want to share the
spoken word instead we wanted to share
virtually every day on average I gained
Twitter a sixty to eighty emails a day
and I guarantee 50% of them can be
reduced only if the person got off their
chair and came and saw me on that day
how many times have you email somebody
that’s sitting right next to you I’ve
done it and I can admit that how many
people have you emailed where you
thought if I just had a quick
conversation that would save this long
email trail self-transformation changed
the way you communicate with others do
you use technology as your form of
communication go and see them let’s go
back to the more traditional ways of
communicating the third model is
commitment how many people in the room
have just gone through Christmas and New
Year and then joined a gym how many
people will still be going to the gym in
February maybe March maybe even April
this element here regards actually your
commitment to see your purpose through
the commitment to see your objectives
through so if you’ve joined a gym what’s
stopping you from going to the
what stopping you from transforming
yourself whether it’s physically or
mentally or emotionally life always
throws us challenges we just get busier
at a work family gets more busier but we
have to continue to make time for
ourselves commit to yourself nobody else
is going to do for you you have to do it
for yourself
consistency this is a very personal
image for me actually I used to wait 18
stone five years ago 18 stone I could
see the face people can’t believe that I
tell you that’s a compliment thank you
very much
but here’s a picture oh man exactly Wow
Wow 18 stone there I’m about 13 now this
is the first time I’m showing this
picture to anybody outside my family and
I want to share to you share with you my
story of how I went from that to this
when I was going through this transition
I never entered the gym once more so
because I was embarrassed another
because I didn’t know what I was doing
but I never entered a gym I never ate
any more healthier I didn’t run any
further or walk any faster
one thing I changed was my mindset I
completely changed the way I saw the
world if you met me then I was possibly
very negative I was very embarrassed
about life I was ashamed I used to just
wear black and blue because I could hide
all of my flab and I went through a
journey I realized and the moment I
realized is when I got out of bed and I
could feel my heart beating and I was
thinking if I don’t do something now my
life today we were completely different
so the journey I went on involved
consistency there was days that were
really good and had fantastic support
like from my loved ones but equally
there were days which were very very
difficult and for me those difficult
days are the most challenging they’re
the ones that most test you in your
perseverance show consistency and will
whatever you want to do you are gonna
have some bad days you’re gonna feel
like giving up no there was times I
drove past McDonald’s I thought nobody
would know if I just go through drive
through quickly nobody would know only
me
willpower show consistency in your cause
the Fifth Element in between eighteen
eighteen hundred and sorry like 1600 to
1800 in the US and in Europe there was
something called the doctors plague the
doctors plague was twenty to twenty-five
percent of women who were giving birth
would die in some hospitals that was
high as seventy to seventy-five percent
of women who went into labor to give
birth the mothers would die it’s called
the doctors plague why a dr. Holmes
fitting name dr. Holmes came in and he
investigated and found that the doctors
who were delivering the babies were also
doing the autopsies in the morning and
we needed to find out science was
progressing very quickly and rightly so
we want to do autopsies we want to find
out why so many women were dying was
given birth so doctors across Europe in
the u.s. were going in and conducting
autopsies in the morning they were then
go in the afternoon and deliver the
babies they delivered the babies only
when dr. Holmes realized they were still
doing the autopsies with a pair of
gloves and then who not changed the
gloves and then deliver babies in the
afternoon they were using the same
gloves as they used during the autopsy
so my fifth element is conflict
sometimes you are the one who’s causing
some of the issues around you sometimes
you are the doctor in that scenario
so it’s the doctors themselves who were
causing the doctors plague because they
just simply did not change their gloves
so think about your personal life ladies
and gents do you find there’s a lot of
conflict around you do you cor do you
feel conflict with others whether it’s
in a professional or a personal
environment maybe a moment you just need
to stop and think am i causing that
conflict with others it’s an honest
conversation to have with yourself when
I was that
18 stone chap and my family will vouch
for this I was quite confrontational and
that was really because I knew it was to
defend how I felt at the time and that’s
something I realized through reflection
so that’s worth thinking about for
yourselves as well
the final one its consolidation so for
me I’ve made a lot of mistakes I’ve
treated people really badly
and I know that I currently with
pressures of being a dad sleepless
nights I’ve barely slept three hours
last night because my little one and you
do feel the frustrations sometimes you
will make mistakes it’s fine to make
mistakes and learn from them
consultation for me the last bit is
consult yourself mistakes will be made
you need to heal self heal so you can
move on I had to do a lot of self
healing when I went through my physical
change from 18 stone to today and I
still do that as I keep moving on so
this model is a great model for us not
to just do once but to keep doing again
and again so when there’s a new job
opportunity or a new family member
joining you or you’ve got conflict at
home or at work just think about this
model and just take a moment to just
stop and reflect is it you or is it
others and what can you do differently
so that is my sixth stage self
transformational model thank you all
very much
you
[Applause]
okay can you hear me actually yes great
okay first of all thank you and very
warm welcome I’m here today to share
with you my story just before I do that
I want to share a fact with you 90% of
adults have at least one major regret in
their life at least one major regret I
think we can all share that we may have
more today I’m going to share with you a
model that I’ve created and followed for
the last five years and lots of what I’m
going to cover today is the first time
I’m sharing it with complete strangers a
lot of it’s just been with me and my
close family so transformation and me
just a bit about me before I begin I’m
currently a senior lecturer in
management and I teach some fantastic
people not only do I teach them they
also teach me as well one thing I’ve
learned organizations nationally
internationally constantly evolving and
changing they’re having to change all
the time and that’s because of external
and internal factors these could be
things like competition market changes
government pressures the same idea I’ve
applied to myself think about moments in
your life ladies and gentlemen where
you’ve been challenged and you’ve had to
do things differently were you prepared
for those challenges what did you do
what I’m not teaching I’m also during
the night a volunteer police inspector
so I manage and lead 25 volunteer police
officers in the West Midlands and I’m
very proud and honored to do that the
person I am today is because of the
journey that I’ve been on I not a
completed product yet but I want to
share with you some of the highlights
along the way one of my biggest
highlights
this little man oh that’s Arjun Arjun is
one years old just celebrated his first
birthday over Christmas Arjun is
somebody who came into our lives and
completely changed my life completely
and parents in the room will know what
I’m talking about and grandparents too
before Arjun came I had a life of
freedom I could go out when I wanted I
could go to parties I could go to
restaurants I could come home when I
wanted the moment the nurse handed me
this beautiful boy
I realized that’s all about to change
suddenly responsibility was thrust upon
me and that’s when I realized I was not
prepared for this moment in my life I
mentally and physically was not prepared
for the journey that was about to begin
and that’s with the responsibility of
being a father so with that in mind what
I did was I created a change model now
this change model is a model of that
first to look to organizations and how
they change but I realized actually
those key elements we can apply to
ourselves and I want to share that story
with you today you are my first audience
so I’m going to share this with there’s
six key components the first one when I
was at school like many of us our
teachers would say what do you want to
be when you grow up what job do you want
to do what type of life do you want to
have and we had an image when we were
young that could have been an astronaut
or a sportsman that could have been a
gardener for some florists for others
something for a lot of people has
changed along the way they’ve lost
clarity vision what has changed for you
as you sit there today do you feel you
have fulfilled everything you wanted to
do
are there still things yet for you to do
you’ve lost your way a little bit
clarity regained that focus identify
what was at the heart of what you wanted
to do whether it’s a job or whether it’s
something personal to you whether it’s
something professional as well and bring
that back to you re clarify what is it
you want to do what is your purpose your
drive the second one is communication
ladies and gents I want to share how
many people in the room we’ve got one of
these and what would happen if your
phone disappeared how would you feel I
can hear the sigh in the room exactly if
we cannot live without our phones the
way we communicate with each other has
changed I’d I teach students who no
longer want to talk to each other but
they’d much prefer to take photos of
each other and put it on snapchat and
Instagram we no longer want to share the
spoken word instead we wanted to share
virtually every day on average I gained
Twitter a sixty to eighty emails a day
and I guarantee 50% of them can be
reduced only if the person got off their
chair and came and saw me on that day
how many times have you email somebody
that’s sitting right next to you I’ve
done it and I can admit that how many
people have you emailed where you
thought if I just had a quick
conversation that would save this long
email trail self-transformation changed
the way you communicate with others do
you use technology as your form of
communication go and see them let’s go
back to the more traditional ways of
communicating the third model is
commitment how many people in the room
have just gone through Christmas and New
Year and then joined a gym how many
people will still be going to the gym in
February maybe March maybe even April
this element here regards actually your
commitment to see your purpose through
the commitment to see your objectives
through so if you’ve joined a gym what’s
stopping you from going to the
what stopping you from transforming
yourself whether it’s physically or
mentally or emotionally life always
throws us challenges we just get busier
at a work family gets more busier but we
have to continue to make time for
ourselves commit to yourself nobody else
is going to do for you you have to do it
for yourself
consistency this is a very personal
image for me actually I used to wait 18
stone five years ago 18 stone I could
see the face people can’t believe that I
tell you that’s a compliment thank you
very much
but here’s a picture oh man exactly Wow
Wow 18 stone there I’m about 13 now this
is the first time I’m showing this
picture to anybody outside my family and
I want to share to you share with you my
story of how I went from that to this
when I was going through this transition
I never entered the gym once more so
because I was embarrassed another
because I didn’t know what I was doing
but I never entered a gym I never ate
any more healthier I didn’t run any
further or walk any faster
one thing I changed was my mindset I
completely changed the way I saw the
world if you met me then I was possibly
very negative I was very embarrassed
about life I was ashamed I used to just
wear black and blue because I could hide
all of my flab and I went through a
journey I realized and the moment I
realized is when I got out of bed and I
could feel my heart beating and I was
thinking if I don’t do something now my
life today we were completely different
so the journey I went on involved
consistency there was days that were
really good and had fantastic support
like from my loved ones but equally
there were days which were very very
difficult and for me those difficult
days are the most challenging they’re
the ones that most test you in your
perseverance show consistency and will
whatever you want to do you are gonna
have some bad days you’re gonna feel
like giving up no there was times I
drove past McDonald’s I thought nobody
would know if I just go through drive
through quickly nobody would know only
me
willpower show consistency in your cause
the Fifth Element in between eighteen
eighteen hundred and sorry like 1600 to
1800 in the US and in Europe there was
something called the doctors plague the
doctors plague was twenty to twenty-five
percent of women who were giving birth
would die in some hospitals that was
high as seventy to seventy-five percent
of women who went into labor to give
birth the mothers would die it’s called
the doctors plague why a dr. Holmes
fitting name dr. Holmes came in and he
investigated and found that the doctors
who were delivering the babies were also
doing the autopsies in the morning and
we needed to find out science was
progressing very quickly and rightly so
we want to do autopsies we want to find
out why so many women were dying was
given birth so doctors across Europe in
the u.s. were going in and conducting
autopsies in the morning they were then
go in the afternoon and deliver the
babies they delivered the babies only
when dr. Holmes realized they were still
doing the autopsies with a pair of
gloves and then who not changed the
gloves and then deliver babies in the
afternoon they were using the same
gloves as they used during the autopsy
so my fifth element is conflict
sometimes you are the one who’s causing
some of the issues around you sometimes
you are the doctor in that scenario
so it’s the doctors themselves who were
causing the doctors plague because they
just simply did not change their gloves
so think about your personal life ladies
and gents do you find there’s a lot of
conflict around you do you cor do you
feel conflict with others whether it’s
in a professional or a personal
environment maybe a moment you just need
to stop and think am i causing that
conflict with others it’s an honest
conversation to have with yourself when
I was that
18 stone chap and my family will vouch
for this I was quite confrontational and
that was really because I knew it was to
defend how I felt at the time and that’s
something I realized through reflection
so that’s worth thinking about for
yourselves as well
the final one its consolidation so for
me I’ve made a lot of mistakes I’ve
treated people really badly
and I know that I currently with
pressures of being a dad sleepless
nights I’ve barely slept three hours
last night because my little one and you
do feel the frustrations sometimes you
will make mistakes it’s fine to make
mistakes and learn from them
consultation for me the last bit is
consult yourself mistakes will be made
you need to heal self heal so you can
move on I had to do a lot of self
healing when I went through my physical
change from 18 stone to today and I
still do that as I keep moving on so
this model is a great model for us not
to just do once but to keep doing again
and again so when there’s a new job
opportunity or a new family member
joining you or you’ve got conflict at
home or at work just think about this
model and just take a moment to just
stop and reflect is it you or is it
others and what can you do differently
so that is my sixth stage self
transformational model thank you all
very much
you
[Applause]
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