forgiveness with you and how forgiveness
can help us become powerful when we are
in a powder situation about four years
ago I wrote a blog about education and
share some of my thoughts on it and it
went viral it has been viewed more than
a hundred and ten thousand time and all
shared more than 27,000 time before I
could celebrate him being famous the
first time ever in my life this turn me
an unexpected situation among my soul
and of comments there’s this one Revere
shouldn’t extreme interesting my writing
and keep talking to me about it I was
more than happy to engage with seeds
conversation at first but later things
get a little bit weird he began to stalk
me on the internet and used all the
method he could find my personal
information my personal blog my Chinese
trade her and my skype number he then
began to stand numerous messages to me
and keeps calling me day after day I try
to be polite at first and answered his
course but sure I realized he was making
my life horrible he spent hours and
hours arguing with me and telling me all
the things I care about was totally
wrong I feel like he was trying to
brainwash me so I got tired of his calls
but he got even more annoyed when I
ignored them then things get really ugly
he began to write paragraphs after
paragraph on all my social media
platform and call me idiot be words
that was really terrible and I don’t
know what you do and he said if I keep
ignoring his calls and messages he would
keep threatening me my friends my family
my classmates my professors all the
people i can imagine who around me man
that was the first time i ever feared
the power of the Internet in a bad way I
feel like Afrojack aids and was so
powerless at that moment I don’t know
what you do and how do you stop him I
hope I could hacked his computer and
make it exploded but it does not seem
realistic right so I can’t my friends
and ask for help among all my friends
most of them offered me the same
solution they said just a pretend he
does not exist he was in China and you
are here in the US just to forgive about
his actions forget about heads and move
on with your life I try to apply my
friend suggestions I ignored his calls I
ignored his message on my skype ID not
all the comments he gave under my blog
post but this approach did not bring me
peace I was living in fear everyday
watch X my met my messages on my phone I
wanna surf the internet I was so scared
that this guy would used another name
another number and keep harassing me
after I blood him I was so scared that
he would carry out all the things he
said he would do and make my friends and
family suffer so thus all my experience
means it’s wrong to forgive
it’s a forgiveness that put me in an
even worse situations and make me
powders yes but also now yes because
with that kind of forgiveness it did not
take me out of that cage but also no
because it’s when you rule needa find
forgiveness it makes you powerless and
if we can look at forgiveness in a
slightly different way it was suddenly
become a powerful tool for you so what
is forgiveness through my research I
have read hundreds of papers in
psychology management marketing and
sociology among all the papers i read
there are tons of definitions of
forgiveness but one definition keep her
rise again and again and it said
forgiveness means let’s around or not
suffer from the wrongdoings and not
making our punishment so if that’s a
case then it may explain why i didn’t
feel better and that definition of the
forgiveness will surely have some
interpretations and implications to some
of my results of my study my research we
start ahead of who and dr. suit find out
that powerless people tend to forgive
more one facing wrongdoings and this
sick less revenge so through my research
we randomly puts participants into two
group and ask them to recall either for
powders or powerful situation and they
write down what was happening to them
then we guided them to read a scenario
we have their teammates did some
wrongdoing towards them and after that
we ask them to tell us how much
forgiveness
they want your shoe to this wrongdoer
studies after studies shoot exactly same
result that powerless people tend to
forgive more than the powerful ones so
there’s all those results taking them
together tell us forgiveness can be
saying as a sign of weakness a sign of
lowes debtors a sign of compromise a
sign of powders and if that’s the case
it will certainly explain why I never
felt better because forgiveness did not
help me to get rid of all those fear and
anger I have but that’s a moment I
realize it’s when you r only define
forgiveness it makes us powers
forgiveness has to be redefined
forgiveness has to be redefined so
forgiveness should be redefined as
forgiving the person for what was
happening in that situation when we
redefine the forgiveness like this we’re
no longer forgiving the action that runs
were carried to us but more likely we
are forgiving what was happened to us
this turns forgiveness in your choice
from being passive where you’re
powerless person left out with the only
option but you forgave interaction when
I finally realized that it suddenly hate
me why those powers participants in my
research responded with higher
agreements on the statement like this
let me read some of them to you although
she hurt me I am putting the hurt aside
so we could resume our relationship I
have released my anger
so I can work on restoring our
relationship to house those powerless
people are forgiving not because they’re
weak but instead they’re empowering
himself after forgiving by forgiving not
what’s action around or was caring but
what happened to them and that’s when
they become powerful and that one’s your
inner fear and anger melt away
forgiveness is not simply forgetting and
it should not be a passive action it
should not be a sign of weakness but
instead a word of power it should be an
active action that we choose as a tour
to help has become powerful in our most
powerless situation so when I reexamined
my situation I realized I did have this
one power over him that L could forgive
him for what happened and by doing that
and free myself from the anger and fear
it had allowed me to escape from the
cage I was seeing and that what made me
powerful to stop the mollys to stop the
anger and fear i ended up responding
wealthiest messager said you know I
don’t want to fight with you anymore I
really don’t but you should be ashamed
of what you did to me you should be
ashamed of all those unreasonable malice
towards me but I forgive you and will
pray for you because this psycho has to
end this pain has to be ended he didn’t
stop her
see me immediately after i sent him this
messenger but his power to make my life
suffer stopped at that moment I become
the powerful one in this situation by
forgiving what happened to me by
escaping from the cage of that end of
fear and anger ed was in that powder
situation that I learned I have this one
power of forgiveness and forgiveness is
not simply let the transgression go but
let yourself go face it head-on accept
it and use the power to stop the malice
stop all the things that happening on
you it may not be easy and you may not
feel ready if you forgive but that’s ok
forgive should not be something like
you’re forcing yourself or others but
keep in mind that’s when you don’t want
your hand on with all those negative
emotions you do have one power of
forgiveness you do have this one option
that can make you powerful event in your
powerless situation it’s not about
letting the transgression go but it’s
about letting yourself go freeing
yourself from the cage of anger and fear
all those negative impacts because after
all you have a general head of you and
you don’t want to keep yourself in that
cage where you were and with all those
anger and resentment you have a life in
front of you and by using the power of
the forgiveness it
help you become powerful a being an otherwise powerless situation thank you