my mother lost her life that 62 she lost
being a grandmother during her
retirement years and her two daughters
lost their biggest cheerleader a little
too early grief often comes in waves and
as a young adult I was between
employment opportunities and I had lost
a significant relationship I wanted to
have a heart at peace but I was flipping
back and forth between anger deep
sadness and resentment the Sunday
newspaper Parade magazine caught my eye
dr. Elisabeth kubler-ross was on the
cover and she was the feature story we
had all studied the dr. Elisabeth
kubler-ross in nursing school she
authored the book the five stages of
death and dying she was offering
workshops at her Healing Waters farm in
Virginia in the Shenandoah Valley with a
catchy title of life death and
transition workshops you can imagine the
response when I called a friend and
asked her to go to the workshop with me
no no Jessica I can’t go to a life death
and transition workshop as I float a
Richmond got a rent car and headed west
I wondered if anybody would be meeting
me for a five-day workshop
dr. kubler-ross always pushed the
envelope in the early 90s she was
working with AIDS patients and the
rights of AIDS babies
her premise was for all healthcare
providers and or those with a terminal
illness to address the negativities in
their life externalise them so that they
could offer unconditional love to their
patients she knew there was healing and
wholeness even in the absence of a cure
well unconditional love
that spoke of the divine I had grown up
in a church I knew about God’s steadfast
love his unconditional love to put this
goal in perspective in the psychological
world all therapists all counselors all
social workers all psychiatrists are
asked to have unconditional positive
regard without unconditional positive
regard therapy does not work as I
studied for a counseling license
I thought unconditional positive regard
was a noble goal and here was dr.
kubler-ross
striving for unconditional love she had
my attention during those five days we
listened and told each other stories we
were asked to draw we risked change our
conscious mind dug down into our
unconscious pulled up conflicting ideas
and we were asked to draw them what
color was it what shape was it
we connected body mind and spirit
insight was a little bit closer
I learned that Freud and Carl Jung had
asked their clients to draw and read
fairy tales while they were pioneering
the psychiatric world the psychological
challenges you and I face are depicted
in fairy tales our drawings are our
journals and our poetry we are all the
same the stories are all about survival
all of art heels but storytelling is the
very first art it’s a seed art as I
pulled out of the driveway on that fifth
morning from that Virginia farm I felt a
glimmer of hope in my heart for the
future I had a heart at peace was this
just my experience or was healing and
storytelling part of the path to peace
our storytelling and healing part of
global peace is finding and telling our
stories part of the peace process
I do believe that we find peace as we
know and tell our stories many have said
the comment that’s attributed to Andrew
Solomon a New York editorial writer that
it’s nearly impossible to hate anybody
once you know their story I’ve told you
my story and how I found storytelling as
part of the peace process storyteller
Dan ketene has crafted and created a
beautiful story about peace it’s
included in the healing heart of
communities a great book and I’ve just
modified his story a little bit for us
today
once high in the Balkan Mountains was a
young boy that was a shepherd and he was
in charge of herding and grazing sheep
every day but it was easy because his
dog did most of the work all he had to
do was find a shady place to rest get
out his timber itzá and he would play
songs he loved the music that his
grandparents played every night at home
he learned all of them by heart and he
played them over and over one day he
went higher up in the foothills and he
found a hidden valley full of dark lush
green long grass the sheep took to it
they were kicking up their heels and he
explored a Ledge along a cliff he found
a cave
it was very dark no light was going
beyond the entrance of the cave and next
to it was a large sun-warmed rock he
leaned against that rock he got his
timber itzá and he played all morning
long until he got hungry he wanted lunch
he puts his instrument down he reached
for his knapsack and then he heard a
voice from the cave keep playing
he froze he wondered how quickly he
could pick up his instrument and flee
and then he heard please very slowly he
picked up his tan buried sir
and he played us
and as the song was over here came a
story from the creature inside the cave
it was a good story and the story ended
and he played another song and his song
ended and here came another story and
they had a rhythm of story for song and
song for story the afternoon melted away
here was the flock of sheep and his dog
coming and as he got up to go he heard
will you come again yes yes I will and
he did he came every day and he was
filled with wonder the stories were
amazing he heard stories of knights
stories of battles stories of adventures
stories of courage and valor and romance
and sadness and humor and promises kept
and promises broken one day he stayed
later and the Sun hung low in the sky
and the creature inside the cave started
telling his story and it was a story of
sadness and loneliness and fear and the
boy listened and he thought I am
listening to the last of its kind some
great storyteller and the light from the
Sun slanted into the cave and it glinted
off of a golden razor-sharp Talon and
the boys listening to this tragic story
but the light is moving and it reveals a
very powerful leg and the light keeps
moving and it reveals a huge side of a
creature covered in scales and the light
shatters off from it and he stares back
into the cave he can’t see the back of
the creature it’s in darkness and he’s
listening and watching and he realizes
he’s staring at a serpentine neck and
this giant head with horns and he’s
listening to a dragon and a giant tear
drops from the Dragons eye and he just
reached for this leathery wing and all
sudden the Dragons golden eyes flare
open and he hears this roar I could kill
you you should be afraid of me the boy
laughed he said I can’t be afraid of you
I know your stories the dragon side will
you still come again tomorrow yes yes I
will and the boy did he came back only
this time he told his stories he told
about the village and the where he grew
up and its grandparents and the music
they played at night and the dragon kept
telling his stories and finally one day
he said why do you live up here all
alone you should come down with me
everybody in the village would they
would love you you would love them they
would love your stories you should come
home with me today oh the dragon snarled
your people and my people have been at
war for over a thousand years if I came
home with you the men of your village
would get their swords there would be a
great battle hundreds would be killed I
would be killed the boy knew he was
right and he travelled that night down
through the hills to the village
wondering how he could solve the problem
Dan kidding continues this great story
and he’s very clever as he devises a
plan for the boy to introduce the dragon
to everybody the village he’s so clever
that he involves a blindfold so that the
mayor and all the village elders heard
the stories before they saw the dragon
and there’s a happy ending the dragon
comes to the village and everybody loves
him and the town prospers because people
come from far and near and stay
overnight in bed and breakfast –is to
here the dragons great stories and at
the end of his life as he lives his last
days he’s not up on a cliff alone in a
cave he’s surrounded by all of the
village people that love him and his
giant dragon head is in the lap of a
young shepherd boy of an elderly man
that you eppard boy his great head is in
the lap of an elderly man that used to
be the young shepherd boy that played
music for him and listened to his
stories and all of the loneliness and
all of the fear went away with one tear
the dragon’s tear by Dan kidding if
storytelling is part of the formula for
peace how can we break this into a
format that we can use the anatomy of
peace is a great book authored by the
ARB injure Institute and they introduced
the influence pyramid now they spend
about 70 pages on this but I’m going to
romp through it with you they defied the
influence of pyramid into a tiny top of
the pyramid that deals with things that
go wrong and the bottom structural part
of the pyramid deals with things that go
right I bet you and I spend most of our
time at the top of the pyramid fixing
and changing things that go wrong what
if we spent our time at the bottom of
the pyramid developing listening skills
relationships that allow us to learn and
tell our stories if I know another story
I see them as a person like myself not
an object that’s inferior and needs to
be changed if I lump every one of a
culture or a race into a single
stereotype I see them as an object
something inferior needing to change I
have a heart at war the anatomy of peace
defines a heart at peace as the desire
to help another I know another story I
see them as a person
I am working for peace in today’s world
these words resonated with me because it
reminded me of what my mother taught she
suggested that we treat everyone with
equal amounts of respect and kindness
I think her exact words were you better
be nice to everybody you ever meet
because you don’t know who’s gonna be
living next door to you in 35 years or
something like that our call to action
is twofold number one we want to work
the bottom of the pyramid we want to
learn these levels of communication
listening and learning building
relationships building relationships of
influence that allows us to know tell
here and listen our stories and secondly
we want to choose to have a heart at
peace to consider the needs of another
we will have this call for action more
than once in every day and it will
appear ho-hum and ordinary it will be
different for each of us we will have
the choice to choose a heart at peace to
consider the needs of another or we will
betray that choice and immediately begin
justifying our actions usually at the
expense of others and ultimately all of
us we can choose to have a heart at
peace and consider the needs of other or
we can have a heart at war and see
others as objects leading to change our
choice makes all of the difference
you know this quote you have read
Margaret needs words before so I am
asking you to read it with me and please
put some energy in your voice never
doubt that a small group of thoughtful
committed fitted citizens
changed the world indeed it’s the only
thing that ever has long live
storytelling thank you
being a grandmother during her
retirement years and her two daughters
lost their biggest cheerleader a little
too early grief often comes in waves and
as a young adult I was between
employment opportunities and I had lost
a significant relationship I wanted to
have a heart at peace but I was flipping
back and forth between anger deep
sadness and resentment the Sunday
newspaper Parade magazine caught my eye
dr. Elisabeth kubler-ross was on the
cover and she was the feature story we
had all studied the dr. Elisabeth
kubler-ross in nursing school she
authored the book the five stages of
death and dying she was offering
workshops at her Healing Waters farm in
Virginia in the Shenandoah Valley with a
catchy title of life death and
transition workshops you can imagine the
response when I called a friend and
asked her to go to the workshop with me
no no Jessica I can’t go to a life death
and transition workshop as I float a
Richmond got a rent car and headed west
I wondered if anybody would be meeting
me for a five-day workshop
dr. kubler-ross always pushed the
envelope in the early 90s she was
working with AIDS patients and the
rights of AIDS babies
her premise was for all healthcare
providers and or those with a terminal
illness to address the negativities in
their life externalise them so that they
could offer unconditional love to their
patients she knew there was healing and
wholeness even in the absence of a cure
well unconditional love
that spoke of the divine I had grown up
in a church I knew about God’s steadfast
love his unconditional love to put this
goal in perspective in the psychological
world all therapists all counselors all
social workers all psychiatrists are
asked to have unconditional positive
regard without unconditional positive
regard therapy does not work as I
studied for a counseling license
I thought unconditional positive regard
was a noble goal and here was dr.
kubler-ross
striving for unconditional love she had
my attention during those five days we
listened and told each other stories we
were asked to draw we risked change our
conscious mind dug down into our
unconscious pulled up conflicting ideas
and we were asked to draw them what
color was it what shape was it
we connected body mind and spirit
insight was a little bit closer
I learned that Freud and Carl Jung had
asked their clients to draw and read
fairy tales while they were pioneering
the psychiatric world the psychological
challenges you and I face are depicted
in fairy tales our drawings are our
journals and our poetry we are all the
same the stories are all about survival
all of art heels but storytelling is the
very first art it’s a seed art as I
pulled out of the driveway on that fifth
morning from that Virginia farm I felt a
glimmer of hope in my heart for the
future I had a heart at peace was this
just my experience or was healing and
storytelling part of the path to peace
our storytelling and healing part of
global peace is finding and telling our
stories part of the peace process
I do believe that we find peace as we
know and tell our stories many have said
the comment that’s attributed to Andrew
Solomon a New York editorial writer that
it’s nearly impossible to hate anybody
once you know their story I’ve told you
my story and how I found storytelling as
part of the peace process storyteller
Dan ketene has crafted and created a
beautiful story about peace it’s
included in the healing heart of
communities a great book and I’ve just
modified his story a little bit for us
today
once high in the Balkan Mountains was a
young boy that was a shepherd and he was
in charge of herding and grazing sheep
every day but it was easy because his
dog did most of the work all he had to
do was find a shady place to rest get
out his timber itzá and he would play
songs he loved the music that his
grandparents played every night at home
he learned all of them by heart and he
played them over and over one day he
went higher up in the foothills and he
found a hidden valley full of dark lush
green long grass the sheep took to it
they were kicking up their heels and he
explored a Ledge along a cliff he found
a cave
it was very dark no light was going
beyond the entrance of the cave and next
to it was a large sun-warmed rock he
leaned against that rock he got his
timber itzá and he played all morning
long until he got hungry he wanted lunch
he puts his instrument down he reached
for his knapsack and then he heard a
voice from the cave keep playing
he froze he wondered how quickly he
could pick up his instrument and flee
and then he heard please very slowly he
picked up his tan buried sir
and he played us
and as the song was over here came a
story from the creature inside the cave
it was a good story and the story ended
and he played another song and his song
ended and here came another story and
they had a rhythm of story for song and
song for story the afternoon melted away
here was the flock of sheep and his dog
coming and as he got up to go he heard
will you come again yes yes I will and
he did he came every day and he was
filled with wonder the stories were
amazing he heard stories of knights
stories of battles stories of adventures
stories of courage and valor and romance
and sadness and humor and promises kept
and promises broken one day he stayed
later and the Sun hung low in the sky
and the creature inside the cave started
telling his story and it was a story of
sadness and loneliness and fear and the
boy listened and he thought I am
listening to the last of its kind some
great storyteller and the light from the
Sun slanted into the cave and it glinted
off of a golden razor-sharp Talon and
the boys listening to this tragic story
but the light is moving and it reveals a
very powerful leg and the light keeps
moving and it reveals a huge side of a
creature covered in scales and the light
shatters off from it and he stares back
into the cave he can’t see the back of
the creature it’s in darkness and he’s
listening and watching and he realizes
he’s staring at a serpentine neck and
this giant head with horns and he’s
listening to a dragon and a giant tear
drops from the Dragons eye and he just
reached for this leathery wing and all
sudden the Dragons golden eyes flare
open and he hears this roar I could kill
you you should be afraid of me the boy
laughed he said I can’t be afraid of you
I know your stories the dragon side will
you still come again tomorrow yes yes I
will and the boy did he came back only
this time he told his stories he told
about the village and the where he grew
up and its grandparents and the music
they played at night and the dragon kept
telling his stories and finally one day
he said why do you live up here all
alone you should come down with me
everybody in the village would they
would love you you would love them they
would love your stories you should come
home with me today oh the dragon snarled
your people and my people have been at
war for over a thousand years if I came
home with you the men of your village
would get their swords there would be a
great battle hundreds would be killed I
would be killed the boy knew he was
right and he travelled that night down
through the hills to the village
wondering how he could solve the problem
Dan kidding continues this great story
and he’s very clever as he devises a
plan for the boy to introduce the dragon
to everybody the village he’s so clever
that he involves a blindfold so that the
mayor and all the village elders heard
the stories before they saw the dragon
and there’s a happy ending the dragon
comes to the village and everybody loves
him and the town prospers because people
come from far and near and stay
overnight in bed and breakfast –is to
here the dragons great stories and at
the end of his life as he lives his last
days he’s not up on a cliff alone in a
cave he’s surrounded by all of the
village people that love him and his
giant dragon head is in the lap of a
young shepherd boy of an elderly man
that you eppard boy his great head is in
the lap of an elderly man that used to
be the young shepherd boy that played
music for him and listened to his
stories and all of the loneliness and
all of the fear went away with one tear
the dragon’s tear by Dan kidding if
storytelling is part of the formula for
peace how can we break this into a
format that we can use the anatomy of
peace is a great book authored by the
ARB injure Institute and they introduced
the influence pyramid now they spend
about 70 pages on this but I’m going to
romp through it with you they defied the
influence of pyramid into a tiny top of
the pyramid that deals with things that
go wrong and the bottom structural part
of the pyramid deals with things that go
right I bet you and I spend most of our
time at the top of the pyramid fixing
and changing things that go wrong what
if we spent our time at the bottom of
the pyramid developing listening skills
relationships that allow us to learn and
tell our stories if I know another story
I see them as a person like myself not
an object that’s inferior and needs to
be changed if I lump every one of a
culture or a race into a single
stereotype I see them as an object
something inferior needing to change I
have a heart at war the anatomy of peace
defines a heart at peace as the desire
to help another I know another story I
see them as a person
I am working for peace in today’s world
these words resonated with me because it
reminded me of what my mother taught she
suggested that we treat everyone with
equal amounts of respect and kindness
I think her exact words were you better
be nice to everybody you ever meet
because you don’t know who’s gonna be
living next door to you in 35 years or
something like that our call to action
is twofold number one we want to work
the bottom of the pyramid we want to
learn these levels of communication
listening and learning building
relationships building relationships of
influence that allows us to know tell
here and listen our stories and secondly
we want to choose to have a heart at
peace to consider the needs of another
we will have this call for action more
than once in every day and it will
appear ho-hum and ordinary it will be
different for each of us we will have
the choice to choose a heart at peace to
consider the needs of another or we will
betray that choice and immediately begin
justifying our actions usually at the
expense of others and ultimately all of
us we can choose to have a heart at
peace and consider the needs of other or
we can have a heart at war and see
others as objects leading to change our
choice makes all of the difference
you know this quote you have read
Margaret needs words before so I am
asking you to read it with me and please
put some energy in your voice never
doubt that a small group of thoughtful
committed fitted citizens
changed the world indeed it’s the only
thing that ever has long live
storytelling thank you
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