crying became the best way I learned how
to ask for attention and I mastered it
as I grew older into a teenager all the
lengths I would go to get the attention
of girls I tried it all from fighting to
show how manly I was to learning to play
guitar so that my life would look like
John Mayer I could have easily been
influenced by the wrong type of
attention but I went from wanting the
attention of grandmother and on to
wanting the attention of a girl who
would someday become my wife and thank
God all the things I did to impress her
we’re always productive because she had
a good head on her shoulders she
graduated valedictorian and was soon
graduate with a doctoral degree in
pharmacy
I knew that my traditional
attention-seeking techniques would not
work with her so everywhere middle
school high school college church and
even tried to follow her to Spain when
she studied abroad I’m not saying that’s
the best way to do things to get a girl
but eventually we got married and I
married a lot of my success to her
because in following someone who was
productive
I organized my goals I became mature and
I developed a work ethic all in hopes to
emulate her and impress her to put it
simply Senator John McCain said the
world is more complicated for children
today than it ever was when I was
growing up a mentor can provide you with
the kind of idealism you can look up to
and attempt to emulate emulating became
my new best way to ask for attention
throughout the course of my life I
continued to emulate more people not not
to marry them but to emulate them and
and learn what good values I could learn
from them and here’s a list of a couple
there were three people who at one time
I considered my best friends we for had
very similar paths in life we were we
all grew up together we all played
football together and we were all
addicted to getting attention
football was our means of getting
attention
and it taught me the best way how to ask
for it even better than crying and
emulating whenever I lost a football
game I would get so disappointed at
myself and I would sit and reflect all
night long as to how I could get better
when my friends my three friends would
go to this postgame football parties and
have a good time I wouldn’t eat or speak
or talk to anyone after we lost and when
I did that my parents would get
concerned and they would stay up with me
and they would share their experiences
of how they failed at things and how
they learned and how we can get better
together all I realized that whenever I
sat in silence to reflect I let others
in to share their experiences of
failures and lessons learned with me I
learned how to ask people how to be my
mentor without doing it verbally what do
I mean by that when you ask somebody to
be your friend do you verbally ask them
no you let it happen over time shared
experiences and by giving them your
attention a friend is someone who gives
you attention over a period of time a
mentor is someone who is wise and gives
you attention over a period of time in
getting the attention and making these
connections I was able to connect with
my coaches teachers and wise people and
became a little bit better every day
this is something my friends never
learned what would cause if you fast
forward 10 years later each of them had
a substance abuse problem experienced
teenage pregnancy and I honestly don’t
know where two of them are today I
became an engineer a founder of a
non-profit a real estate investor and a
father to a beautiful three-month-old
baby girl named autumn it’s a little
pixelated because
she looks more like her mother and I was
a little jealous what would cause for
individuals who live seemingly parallel
lives to end up with such different
outcomes in life research research
suggests that adolescents tend to be
influenced more by their peers and
making risky decisions this is why
adolescents look to emulate their peers
in making risky decisions and one
instant gratification now this is why
they invest in having a good time now
after they lose a football game for a
post post football game party instead of
staying up all night with your parents
or a mentor to learn how you can get
better as a team the difference is who
we saw attention from I was very blessed
to have the mentors that I have and
learn how to connect with them and
understand the power in that I began to
think I wonder how many students young
adults children fail to reach their full
potential because they settle for the
attention of their peers instead of
learning how to share experiences with
those who are wise and recent data shows
with si 2020 s 2017 impact report that
in the community I live in only 6% of
residents who are over the age of 25
have obtained a bachelor’s degree or
higher what that means is that one in 16
residents have obtained a bachelor’s
degree 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14
15 16 found women so my wife and I
decided to start a non-profit in 2015
called building a purpose to feed
students these constructive productive
attention from mentors so that they
could chat
their paths of life and show them how to
ask for attention easily by going to our
website I’m building a purpose comm and
selecting a mentor under a category of
an interest that they want to do I’m
proud to say that we have reached over
800 students throughout all our programs
after surveying 200 of them we found
that 80% of students who know what
profession they want to pursue do not
know a professional in that field so I
reached out to every mentor that I had
at the time and I said would you be
willing to mentor a student if they go
went on our website and selected you as
a mentor I’m also proud to say we’ve
have over 50 professionals who are
active mentors in our program and that
doesn’t even include the few hundred we
have in our mentorship database waiting
to be vetted these are professionals
like doctors lawyers in the health care
industry in law in education in
engineering who fly from across the
country some some who come from Austin
this is a list of view in their
selection sheet when our students go and
choose this is the power of giving
others your attention at the beginning
of our program when only 20% of the
students who know what profession they
want to pursue at the end of our program
100% of our students know the profession
that a professional in the field that
whether we like to admit it or not we
are all addicted to getting attention
whether it comes from a one-on-one
conversation or from a lot of people at
once whether it comes from seeing a
guest speaker speak and being inspired
or from having a lifelong mentor but we
need to remember the importance of
giving our youth our productive
attention I mastered three ways in
asking for attention
but the most powerful way is in giving
others your attention I want to leave
you with one last thought Melissa Mayer
CEO of Yahoo said I always did something
I was a little not ready to do and I
think that’s how you grow when there’s
that moment of wow I’m not really sure I
can do this and you push through it
those moments that’s when you have a
breakthrough there will be a time when
someone needs your attention the most
and it may not be the time for you and
it may not be something you’re ready to
do but adolescent research suggests that
the teenage years are the best years to
influence adolescence I highly encourage
you to keep an eye out for those in your
community who may need your attention
because you are someone’s breakthrough
the type of attention you get and who
you get it from determines where we end
up in life thank you [Applause]
to ask for attention and I mastered it
as I grew older into a teenager all the
lengths I would go to get the attention
of girls I tried it all from fighting to
show how manly I was to learning to play
guitar so that my life would look like
John Mayer I could have easily been
influenced by the wrong type of
attention but I went from wanting the
attention of grandmother and on to
wanting the attention of a girl who
would someday become my wife and thank
God all the things I did to impress her
we’re always productive because she had
a good head on her shoulders she
graduated valedictorian and was soon
graduate with a doctoral degree in
pharmacy
I knew that my traditional
attention-seeking techniques would not
work with her so everywhere middle
school high school college church and
even tried to follow her to Spain when
she studied abroad I’m not saying that’s
the best way to do things to get a girl
but eventually we got married and I
married a lot of my success to her
because in following someone who was
productive
I organized my goals I became mature and
I developed a work ethic all in hopes to
emulate her and impress her to put it
simply Senator John McCain said the
world is more complicated for children
today than it ever was when I was
growing up a mentor can provide you with
the kind of idealism you can look up to
and attempt to emulate emulating became
my new best way to ask for attention
throughout the course of my life I
continued to emulate more people not not
to marry them but to emulate them and
and learn what good values I could learn
from them and here’s a list of a couple
there were three people who at one time
I considered my best friends we for had
very similar paths in life we were we
all grew up together we all played
football together and we were all
addicted to getting attention
football was our means of getting
attention
and it taught me the best way how to ask
for it even better than crying and
emulating whenever I lost a football
game I would get so disappointed at
myself and I would sit and reflect all
night long as to how I could get better
when my friends my three friends would
go to this postgame football parties and
have a good time I wouldn’t eat or speak
or talk to anyone after we lost and when
I did that my parents would get
concerned and they would stay up with me
and they would share their experiences
of how they failed at things and how
they learned and how we can get better
together all I realized that whenever I
sat in silence to reflect I let others
in to share their experiences of
failures and lessons learned with me I
learned how to ask people how to be my
mentor without doing it verbally what do
I mean by that when you ask somebody to
be your friend do you verbally ask them
no you let it happen over time shared
experiences and by giving them your
attention a friend is someone who gives
you attention over a period of time a
mentor is someone who is wise and gives
you attention over a period of time in
getting the attention and making these
connections I was able to connect with
my coaches teachers and wise people and
became a little bit better every day
this is something my friends never
learned what would cause if you fast
forward 10 years later each of them had
a substance abuse problem experienced
teenage pregnancy and I honestly don’t
know where two of them are today I
became an engineer a founder of a
non-profit a real estate investor and a
father to a beautiful three-month-old
baby girl named autumn it’s a little
pixelated because
she looks more like her mother and I was
a little jealous what would cause for
individuals who live seemingly parallel
lives to end up with such different
outcomes in life research research
suggests that adolescents tend to be
influenced more by their peers and
making risky decisions this is why
adolescents look to emulate their peers
in making risky decisions and one
instant gratification now this is why
they invest in having a good time now
after they lose a football game for a
post post football game party instead of
staying up all night with your parents
or a mentor to learn how you can get
better as a team the difference is who
we saw attention from I was very blessed
to have the mentors that I have and
learn how to connect with them and
understand the power in that I began to
think I wonder how many students young
adults children fail to reach their full
potential because they settle for the
attention of their peers instead of
learning how to share experiences with
those who are wise and recent data shows
with si 2020 s 2017 impact report that
in the community I live in only 6% of
residents who are over the age of 25
have obtained a bachelor’s degree or
higher what that means is that one in 16
residents have obtained a bachelor’s
degree 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14
15 16 found women so my wife and I
decided to start a non-profit in 2015
called building a purpose to feed
students these constructive productive
attention from mentors so that they
could chat
their paths of life and show them how to
ask for attention easily by going to our
website I’m building a purpose comm and
selecting a mentor under a category of
an interest that they want to do I’m
proud to say that we have reached over
800 students throughout all our programs
after surveying 200 of them we found
that 80% of students who know what
profession they want to pursue do not
know a professional in that field so I
reached out to every mentor that I had
at the time and I said would you be
willing to mentor a student if they go
went on our website and selected you as
a mentor I’m also proud to say we’ve
have over 50 professionals who are
active mentors in our program and that
doesn’t even include the few hundred we
have in our mentorship database waiting
to be vetted these are professionals
like doctors lawyers in the health care
industry in law in education in
engineering who fly from across the
country some some who come from Austin
this is a list of view in their
selection sheet when our students go and
choose this is the power of giving
others your attention at the beginning
of our program when only 20% of the
students who know what profession they
want to pursue at the end of our program
100% of our students know the profession
that a professional in the field that
whether we like to admit it or not we
are all addicted to getting attention
whether it comes from a one-on-one
conversation or from a lot of people at
once whether it comes from seeing a
guest speaker speak and being inspired
or from having a lifelong mentor but we
need to remember the importance of
giving our youth our productive
attention I mastered three ways in
asking for attention
but the most powerful way is in giving
others your attention I want to leave
you with one last thought Melissa Mayer
CEO of Yahoo said I always did something
I was a little not ready to do and I
think that’s how you grow when there’s
that moment of wow I’m not really sure I
can do this and you push through it
those moments that’s when you have a
breakthrough there will be a time when
someone needs your attention the most
and it may not be the time for you and
it may not be something you’re ready to
do but adolescent research suggests that
the teenage years are the best years to
influence adolescence I highly encourage
you to keep an eye out for those in your
community who may need your attention
because you are someone’s breakthrough
the type of attention you get and who
you get it from determines where we end
up in life thank you [Applause]
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