I’m a merman wire and I’m gonna be
talking to you today about the mystery
of music according to science so I’m a
science communicator and I like to teach
science to the general public I like to
try and get people interested in science
and I try to do that by talking about
science it’s in the everyday and science
of love science of friendships science
of music and also hosts as as herb said
there are a BBC radio show called
science and stuff with Emer McGuire
where we look at all things science and
tech but something that people don’t
know as well about me is that I’m
actually a musician and a music lover
any music fans and here good and so
music has been a massive part of my life
way before science or way before
anything else as a child I always loved
music and and you know my mom was always
surrounding us with music and I just
thought it was such a brilliant pastime
to have and I was thinking music is
there and so many of our life’s moments
it’s there you know if you get married
if your festivals with your friends if
you’re on a night it’s a huge part of
your life and that got me thinking what
does music mean to us and I tried to
come up with you know like a really
inspirational quote but I couldn’t so I
took one from a philosopher he did a
much better job with that music life
would be a mistake and and I think that
kind of personifies how much people
adore music but I wanted to get the
definition of music was there scientific
definition and and the merriam-webster
dictionary has said that music is the
science or art of ordering tones or
signs and succession and combination and
temporal relationships to produce a
composition having unity and continuity
and that that was exactly how I was
going to describe it
we got in there slightly before me but
the bit of that that I find interesting
is the science or art because to me
coming from a creative background and a
scientific background music definitely
sets somewhere within the middle so if
we want to understand music I like to go
back to the beginning to the evolution
of music and when humans started using
music so about 60,000 to 30,000 years
ago we had this Cultural Revolution we
started cave painting we started making
jewelry and all these creative behaviors
that we started engaging in meant that
we were starting to use our imagination
and our intentionality and that probably
meant that music came along during that
same time period but we needed proof we
needed evidence that music was there and
in 2008 we found a piece of that
evidence in Germany there was a flip
that had been find it had been made with
five holes it was 43,000 years old so it
was right in the middle of that time
period there were other instruments
close by and this kind of indicated that
our ancestors were making instruments
and they were using instruments so they
must have been aware and engaged with
music there’s a very interesting guy in
this story Wolfe fine thanks a fantastic
name but I like to think of him as the
flute finder he was one of the members
of the archaeological team that find the
flute and he did something that I think
was genius he made a copy of it and
played it and he found that it produced
something called the pentatonic scale
and I am musical history and musical
systems this is a five note scale that
we use back then and we still use today
for example it’s used in smells like
teen spirit oasis use it it’s used and
use somebody’ by kings early on so we
almost have that length to history they
could have been making similar music to
us and I like to think about our
ancestors maybe and their kids doing
their cave paintings making their
jewelry
I may be thinking of the start if don’t
look back in anger so we know when our
music evolved but we need to think why
evolved and charged Darwin said music
evolved as a sexy survival – it’s not an
exact quote it’s kind of my summary of
what he said so music evolved as a sexy
survival tool so a stereo V volition
natural selection and survival of the
fittest if there’s an activity that
humans are involved in that’s really
really old like music as we know now
from the evidence and popular across a
lot of cultures like music we most
likely still have that activity because
in some way it benefits human survival
but how can music help us survive Darwin
looked to the birds and he thought Birds
use songs to track mates
maybe humans do the same thing it sounds
a wee bit unusual rebus far-fetched but
if you think about it if we want to keep
humankind going we need to keep
reproducing we need to attract myths to
do this and music can help what people
agree with that yeah so if the survival
of the fittest approach to evolution is
correct there’s no real other logical
explanation for the origins of music it
doesn’t help us survive in any other way
back with our ancestors wouldn’t really
have helped them to get food or shelter
and it would have been quite costly
could’ve actually attracted predators
their way so most have helped our
species survive in some way on the
reasonable explanation is that it helps
us attract mates so that got me thinking
of the question does this guitar make me
look hot
only reason I play it and put up your
hand if you think musicians are sexier
than normal people keep your hands up
with two hands off for you like it keep
your hands up yeah so everyone with
their hands up a correct answer and so
we’ve got three musicians here quite
clear that some of them are quite
good-looking and but I’d like to talk
about something that I call the Ed
and no disrespect there
do you like him but he’s not
God forgive us all well but he wouldn’t
be classically attractive what you would
think of as classically attractive so I
did a little bit of digging into this
because a lot of people told me they
found see that Sharon and I couldn’t
really see it um on the turn side he was
on the hottest gingers list with that’s
a thing with people like Prince Hari he
a lot of people do you like um you and
MacGregor
he is very attractive and I thought
maybe this is just for people who are
under gingers you know maybe it’s just
for those people so I kind of opened my
search up a bit and a couple of years
ago he was on the sexiest man alive list
well people like David Beckham Chris
Payne very very attractive people and I
tried to figure out the difference and
the difference was that he was the only
one holding the guitar and and science
have looked into this and people came
upon like van I think oh god him less
attractive because I don’t play an
instrument you don’t have to worry too
much because there was a study in France
where they got a guy to kind of try and
get a hundred girls phone numbers when
he was holding sports by nine percent of
girls giving their phone numbers will
need nothing 14% of carats give him his
full number with a guitar kiss 31% of
garin’s gave their phone number which is
unbelievable I understand exactly where
they were coming from and but I think
that’s fascinating and the thing is you
don’t even need to learn the instrument
just hold the guitar why don’t you in
play this this is just purely so I like
more attractive just hold the guitar
kiss you’ll be on to a winner
now you’re slightly more serious side of
music and I do work in the NHS and in
the hospital so I’m quite interested in
music as medicine and the NHS described
it as psychological therapy tries to
facilitate your positive changes and
emotional well-being a communication
through music but does it work there’s a
very interesting study by Hanser on
depression and hanser wanted to find out
if music would be able to reduce stress
and anxiety and older people who had
depression she she did a very
interesting story she split a group of
cohort in the three grips grip one got
proper full music therapy once a week
eight weeks the next group got a more
diluted version and they got telephone
support and the last group didn’t get
anything and the groups who received
therapy diluted or not had a dramatic
decrease and their anxiety and
depression afterwards and that lasted
long term so music can obviously have a
very positive impact on us mentally and
there was a lovely story the key might
of this study which you don’t say
usually about scientific studies but a
really lovely heartfelt story there was
a member in the grip called gin and she
had a husband called burner June was 69
and her husband had passed away and
obviously she was devastated about this
and the therapist said look why don’t
you why don’t you use your husband’s
records because he was a musician he
played in big bands use his records as
your therapy tools and after the study
was finished June sent this to the
researcher before I took out all those
records I spent every day thinking I
would never see my husband again
I loved him so much I couldn’t bear to
be without him but now I put on his
music I feel like he’s with me I think
about all the great times we had and how
much we shared
I love the records and I love listening
to his records thank you for giving me
back my husband so I think that’s a sign
that music can really help us in terms
of our anxiety under prayer
I just thought that was a really lovely
story so what about people who aren’t
musical as anyone in here anyone
consider themselves to be torn deaf drop
your hand cuz there must be
statistically quite a few of you you put
your hand up really confidently so
you’re definitely told deaf that’s what
they tell me you don’t know yourself all
the say because you’re told death okay
would you sing a wee bit of something
for us it has to be something
recognizable that everybody would know
anything sing it you know like well know
if you’re at a chin okay so we can tell
pretty quickly
if somebody’s still there big applause
you’re very brave I wouldn’t have done
that in Rio so if you’re tone deaf
you were strong alone away but with the
jumps between the notes and a lot of
music that we have there are a lot of
small jumps between the notes for people
who are tone-deaf can’t perceive that or
reproduce in melodies and and you can be
born to endeavor it can be as a result
of brain damage and sued by tune every
100 people have this so I think they
might’ve people put up their hand in
here it was quite an accurate number and
so it’s a bit of a guessing game you’re
singing there’s succeeded with us which
is beat deafness which is quite a new
thing people who can’t dance people with
two left feet like dreck is anybody
anybody in here I think there are but
big deaf they can’t really dance put
your hands up I’m not gonna make you
dance for AB everyone yeah can you
though sometimes people who are
tone-deaf can’t dance as well or
perceive their own body movements but
that’s okay and so there’s slightly more
people per hundred who are beat deaf and
this is only discovered quite recently
so there’s a study at McGill University
2011 if you have a hard time keeping up
with a metronome the changes tempo
you’re probably beat deaf people here
quite bad dancers quite awkward dancers
probably big deaf and it’s abnormalities
on the left auditory cortex of the brain
so 2 percent of people with tone-deaf 4
percent of the people are bit deaf so
slightly more about dancers and then bad
singers so I’m actually a singer
songwriter so I always think is there a
perfect formula for a song and could you
do it like maths and I find out they’re
actually they’re actually is most of our
western music most of our songs are in a
major key most of them start on the
written note of a key um as I said
earlier the melody falls a lot of small
jumps and a couple of big jumps the
songs are repetitive um like Justin
Bieber over and over again to make it
easier for us to remember and we used
about 7 / 12 notes because with this
magic number 7 it’s the kind of ideal I
might have information to keep in our
head
at one time so so many popular Western
songs follow this follow this pattern
any guitarists in here she certainly
knew these chords are the first four
chords you learn yeah so C a minor
effigy we are kind of obsessed with
these four chords there and quite a lot
of our western music and I learn quite a
lot of songs and you would say to people
you know you could play any song with
these with these chords and people
usually think no it’s a it’s only pop
songs or it’s only it’s only new songs
but I just kind of wanted to demonstrate
the importance of these chords and our
western music sponsors see our a minor
or African or G so you can use these for
anything really
kiss me under the light of a thousand
stars oh darling place your head on my
beating heart antelope sees you uses
them all the time Taylor trusts as well
so it’s gonna be forever or it’s gonna
go down in flames you can tell me when
it’s over and if the high was worth the
pain got a long list of ex-lovers
they’ll tell you I’m insane and I got a
blank space baby and should all the
[Music]
Oh
and the land is dark and the moon is the
can you feel the love tonight
will really try baby tryna hold back
this feeling’s so but if you feel just
how I feel baby
I come up and let’s get it on
any songs you want you can use those
so just to finish off I thought it’d be
a nice exercise to write a song trying
to use a challenge of only using those
four chords
I’m obviously automatically it’ll be a
hit and it was my intention so I thought
C a minor F and J if it works for all
those songs surely it would work for a
song for me and something else I like to
do whenever I’m trying to teach people
about science is to try and make sure
people have a good time people enjoy
themselves so I thought I would write a
song about myself personally about my
love life and because it would be a bit
of a joke and I thought I’d write it
about Instagram has anyone here heard
the phrase ensta bay No so it’s the bay
is whenever you find someone online and
you can’t fall in love with them you
don’t know them and she’s me on
Instagram and I cheesy someone very
attractive and you aspire to spend your
whole life with them and
and you would say things like oh I was
50 weeks deep in their nose fade I mean
and you know you’d gone 50 weeks back
and you’d looked at you know their
photos from when they were about three
and then you kind of gotten to another
whole family a real kinship with this
person but they don’t know you um so I
thought I would write a song about one
of the many times that I fell in love on
Instagram so it’s called hashtag against
obey and I hope everybody has had a
great day
that’s RC
a minor so I’m just gonna use these cars
look at a man thing else
I’m just online and talking to people I
gets me some wine and up stalking some
people I’m trying to find my insta Bay
then I see your picture and I’m like
hashtag hey you like taking photos of
yourself in the mirror me too you also
like taking photos of your mediocre food
you even have pictures of you and your
dog ID on your bike’s I don’t like dogs
but I could use them in my photo for
likes man I see it
cue my heart break this must be a
mistake
who is she in your Instagram feed no it
should be me Gavin 50 weeks deep in your
photos for days maybe we should get
engaged there’s like 30 different ways
for me to find your address
[Music]
snapchat geo-tagging on if not you
turned it off but baby maybe you was
wrong your Facebook checked in to your
mama’s house tell her from my side of
her window that I liked her place that
girl
[Music]
that girl in your it’s the grandmas in
the half gets pretty and Smith despite
the fact she’s an underwear model for
Abercrombie & Fitch what a widt shop
guess who she’s got no personality
and I don’t care that her hair looks
like Steve in your photos four days
there’s like 30 different ways for me to
find your address we could have been for
real
Facebook relationship not my only
commitment is eating this bargain buck
up with a gravy chip get up Netflix and
chill and I’ve got a sofa bed no y’all
just snap like some fella myself with
garlic bread me there’s like 30
different ways for me to find you
I’ve just noticed you have the same
second name
you must have married her my life will
never be the same
how could you do this to us do you’ve no
decency my hashtag against the base
hashtag and stir betrayed me so I slide
into your DMS that’s direct message guys
and as I wait for your reply tears are
falling both my eyes I wrote I can’t
believe you married
Kylie loved her held or kissed her you
replied I don’t know who you are
the Kylie is my sister
so it could be me in your Instagram feed
and should be see having 50 weeks sleep
in your photos for days baby let’s just
get in gates there’s like 30 different
ways for me to find your address thank
you so much for listening [Applause]
talking to you today about the mystery
of music according to science so I’m a
science communicator and I like to teach
science to the general public I like to
try and get people interested in science
and I try to do that by talking about
science it’s in the everyday and science
of love science of friendships science
of music and also hosts as as herb said
there are a BBC radio show called
science and stuff with Emer McGuire
where we look at all things science and
tech but something that people don’t
know as well about me is that I’m
actually a musician and a music lover
any music fans and here good and so
music has been a massive part of my life
way before science or way before
anything else as a child I always loved
music and and you know my mom was always
surrounding us with music and I just
thought it was such a brilliant pastime
to have and I was thinking music is
there and so many of our life’s moments
it’s there you know if you get married
if your festivals with your friends if
you’re on a night it’s a huge part of
your life and that got me thinking what
does music mean to us and I tried to
come up with you know like a really
inspirational quote but I couldn’t so I
took one from a philosopher he did a
much better job with that music life
would be a mistake and and I think that
kind of personifies how much people
adore music but I wanted to get the
definition of music was there scientific
definition and and the merriam-webster
dictionary has said that music is the
science or art of ordering tones or
signs and succession and combination and
temporal relationships to produce a
composition having unity and continuity
and that that was exactly how I was
going to describe it
we got in there slightly before me but
the bit of that that I find interesting
is the science or art because to me
coming from a creative background and a
scientific background music definitely
sets somewhere within the middle so if
we want to understand music I like to go
back to the beginning to the evolution
of music and when humans started using
music so about 60,000 to 30,000 years
ago we had this Cultural Revolution we
started cave painting we started making
jewelry and all these creative behaviors
that we started engaging in meant that
we were starting to use our imagination
and our intentionality and that probably
meant that music came along during that
same time period but we needed proof we
needed evidence that music was there and
in 2008 we found a piece of that
evidence in Germany there was a flip
that had been find it had been made with
five holes it was 43,000 years old so it
was right in the middle of that time
period there were other instruments
close by and this kind of indicated that
our ancestors were making instruments
and they were using instruments so they
must have been aware and engaged with
music there’s a very interesting guy in
this story Wolfe fine thanks a fantastic
name but I like to think of him as the
flute finder he was one of the members
of the archaeological team that find the
flute and he did something that I think
was genius he made a copy of it and
played it and he found that it produced
something called the pentatonic scale
and I am musical history and musical
systems this is a five note scale that
we use back then and we still use today
for example it’s used in smells like
teen spirit oasis use it it’s used and
use somebody’ by kings early on so we
almost have that length to history they
could have been making similar music to
us and I like to think about our
ancestors maybe and their kids doing
their cave paintings making their
jewelry
I may be thinking of the start if don’t
look back in anger so we know when our
music evolved but we need to think why
evolved and charged Darwin said music
evolved as a sexy survival – it’s not an
exact quote it’s kind of my summary of
what he said so music evolved as a sexy
survival tool so a stereo V volition
natural selection and survival of the
fittest if there’s an activity that
humans are involved in that’s really
really old like music as we know now
from the evidence and popular across a
lot of cultures like music we most
likely still have that activity because
in some way it benefits human survival
but how can music help us survive Darwin
looked to the birds and he thought Birds
use songs to track mates
maybe humans do the same thing it sounds
a wee bit unusual rebus far-fetched but
if you think about it if we want to keep
humankind going we need to keep
reproducing we need to attract myths to
do this and music can help what people
agree with that yeah so if the survival
of the fittest approach to evolution is
correct there’s no real other logical
explanation for the origins of music it
doesn’t help us survive in any other way
back with our ancestors wouldn’t really
have helped them to get food or shelter
and it would have been quite costly
could’ve actually attracted predators
their way so most have helped our
species survive in some way on the
reasonable explanation is that it helps
us attract mates so that got me thinking
of the question does this guitar make me
look hot
only reason I play it and put up your
hand if you think musicians are sexier
than normal people keep your hands up
with two hands off for you like it keep
your hands up yeah so everyone with
their hands up a correct answer and so
we’ve got three musicians here quite
clear that some of them are quite
good-looking and but I’d like to talk
about something that I call the Ed
and no disrespect there
do you like him but he’s not
God forgive us all well but he wouldn’t
be classically attractive what you would
think of as classically attractive so I
did a little bit of digging into this
because a lot of people told me they
found see that Sharon and I couldn’t
really see it um on the turn side he was
on the hottest gingers list with that’s
a thing with people like Prince Hari he
a lot of people do you like um you and
MacGregor
he is very attractive and I thought
maybe this is just for people who are
under gingers you know maybe it’s just
for those people so I kind of opened my
search up a bit and a couple of years
ago he was on the sexiest man alive list
well people like David Beckham Chris
Payne very very attractive people and I
tried to figure out the difference and
the difference was that he was the only
one holding the guitar and and science
have looked into this and people came
upon like van I think oh god him less
attractive because I don’t play an
instrument you don’t have to worry too
much because there was a study in France
where they got a guy to kind of try and
get a hundred girls phone numbers when
he was holding sports by nine percent of
girls giving their phone numbers will
need nothing 14% of carats give him his
full number with a guitar kiss 31% of
garin’s gave their phone number which is
unbelievable I understand exactly where
they were coming from and but I think
that’s fascinating and the thing is you
don’t even need to learn the instrument
just hold the guitar why don’t you in
play this this is just purely so I like
more attractive just hold the guitar
kiss you’ll be on to a winner
now you’re slightly more serious side of
music and I do work in the NHS and in
the hospital so I’m quite interested in
music as medicine and the NHS described
it as psychological therapy tries to
facilitate your positive changes and
emotional well-being a communication
through music but does it work there’s a
very interesting study by Hanser on
depression and hanser wanted to find out
if music would be able to reduce stress
and anxiety and older people who had
depression she she did a very
interesting story she split a group of
cohort in the three grips grip one got
proper full music therapy once a week
eight weeks the next group got a more
diluted version and they got telephone
support and the last group didn’t get
anything and the groups who received
therapy diluted or not had a dramatic
decrease and their anxiety and
depression afterwards and that lasted
long term so music can obviously have a
very positive impact on us mentally and
there was a lovely story the key might
of this study which you don’t say
usually about scientific studies but a
really lovely heartfelt story there was
a member in the grip called gin and she
had a husband called burner June was 69
and her husband had passed away and
obviously she was devastated about this
and the therapist said look why don’t
you why don’t you use your husband’s
records because he was a musician he
played in big bands use his records as
your therapy tools and after the study
was finished June sent this to the
researcher before I took out all those
records I spent every day thinking I
would never see my husband again
I loved him so much I couldn’t bear to
be without him but now I put on his
music I feel like he’s with me I think
about all the great times we had and how
much we shared
I love the records and I love listening
to his records thank you for giving me
back my husband so I think that’s a sign
that music can really help us in terms
of our anxiety under prayer
I just thought that was a really lovely
story so what about people who aren’t
musical as anyone in here anyone
consider themselves to be torn deaf drop
your hand cuz there must be
statistically quite a few of you you put
your hand up really confidently so
you’re definitely told deaf that’s what
they tell me you don’t know yourself all
the say because you’re told death okay
would you sing a wee bit of something
for us it has to be something
recognizable that everybody would know
anything sing it you know like well know
if you’re at a chin okay so we can tell
pretty quickly
if somebody’s still there big applause
you’re very brave I wouldn’t have done
that in Rio so if you’re tone deaf
you were strong alone away but with the
jumps between the notes and a lot of
music that we have there are a lot of
small jumps between the notes for people
who are tone-deaf can’t perceive that or
reproduce in melodies and and you can be
born to endeavor it can be as a result
of brain damage and sued by tune every
100 people have this so I think they
might’ve people put up their hand in
here it was quite an accurate number and
so it’s a bit of a guessing game you’re
singing there’s succeeded with us which
is beat deafness which is quite a new
thing people who can’t dance people with
two left feet like dreck is anybody
anybody in here I think there are but
big deaf they can’t really dance put
your hands up I’m not gonna make you
dance for AB everyone yeah can you
though sometimes people who are
tone-deaf can’t dance as well or
perceive their own body movements but
that’s okay and so there’s slightly more
people per hundred who are beat deaf and
this is only discovered quite recently
so there’s a study at McGill University
2011 if you have a hard time keeping up
with a metronome the changes tempo
you’re probably beat deaf people here
quite bad dancers quite awkward dancers
probably big deaf and it’s abnormalities
on the left auditory cortex of the brain
so 2 percent of people with tone-deaf 4
percent of the people are bit deaf so
slightly more about dancers and then bad
singers so I’m actually a singer
songwriter so I always think is there a
perfect formula for a song and could you
do it like maths and I find out they’re
actually they’re actually is most of our
western music most of our songs are in a
major key most of them start on the
written note of a key um as I said
earlier the melody falls a lot of small
jumps and a couple of big jumps the
songs are repetitive um like Justin
Bieber over and over again to make it
easier for us to remember and we used
about 7 / 12 notes because with this
magic number 7 it’s the kind of ideal I
might have information to keep in our
head
at one time so so many popular Western
songs follow this follow this pattern
any guitarists in here she certainly
knew these chords are the first four
chords you learn yeah so C a minor
effigy we are kind of obsessed with
these four chords there and quite a lot
of our western music and I learn quite a
lot of songs and you would say to people
you know you could play any song with
these with these chords and people
usually think no it’s a it’s only pop
songs or it’s only it’s only new songs
but I just kind of wanted to demonstrate
the importance of these chords and our
western music sponsors see our a minor
or African or G so you can use these for
anything really
kiss me under the light of a thousand
stars oh darling place your head on my
beating heart antelope sees you uses
them all the time Taylor trusts as well
so it’s gonna be forever or it’s gonna
go down in flames you can tell me when
it’s over and if the high was worth the
pain got a long list of ex-lovers
they’ll tell you I’m insane and I got a
blank space baby and should all the
[Music]
Oh
and the land is dark and the moon is the
can you feel the love tonight
will really try baby tryna hold back
this feeling’s so but if you feel just
how I feel baby
I come up and let’s get it on
any songs you want you can use those
so just to finish off I thought it’d be
a nice exercise to write a song trying
to use a challenge of only using those
four chords
I’m obviously automatically it’ll be a
hit and it was my intention so I thought
C a minor F and J if it works for all
those songs surely it would work for a
song for me and something else I like to
do whenever I’m trying to teach people
about science is to try and make sure
people have a good time people enjoy
themselves so I thought I would write a
song about myself personally about my
love life and because it would be a bit
of a joke and I thought I’d write it
about Instagram has anyone here heard
the phrase ensta bay No so it’s the bay
is whenever you find someone online and
you can’t fall in love with them you
don’t know them and she’s me on
Instagram and I cheesy someone very
attractive and you aspire to spend your
whole life with them and
and you would say things like oh I was
50 weeks deep in their nose fade I mean
and you know you’d gone 50 weeks back
and you’d looked at you know their
photos from when they were about three
and then you kind of gotten to another
whole family a real kinship with this
person but they don’t know you um so I
thought I would write a song about one
of the many times that I fell in love on
Instagram so it’s called hashtag against
obey and I hope everybody has had a
great day
that’s RC
a minor so I’m just gonna use these cars
look at a man thing else
I’m just online and talking to people I
gets me some wine and up stalking some
people I’m trying to find my insta Bay
then I see your picture and I’m like
hashtag hey you like taking photos of
yourself in the mirror me too you also
like taking photos of your mediocre food
you even have pictures of you and your
dog ID on your bike’s I don’t like dogs
but I could use them in my photo for
likes man I see it
cue my heart break this must be a
mistake
who is she in your Instagram feed no it
should be me Gavin 50 weeks deep in your
photos for days maybe we should get
engaged there’s like 30 different ways
for me to find your address
[Music]
snapchat geo-tagging on if not you
turned it off but baby maybe you was
wrong your Facebook checked in to your
mama’s house tell her from my side of
her window that I liked her place that
girl
[Music]
that girl in your it’s the grandmas in
the half gets pretty and Smith despite
the fact she’s an underwear model for
Abercrombie & Fitch what a widt shop
guess who she’s got no personality
and I don’t care that her hair looks
like Steve in your photos four days
there’s like 30 different ways for me to
find your address we could have been for
real
Facebook relationship not my only
commitment is eating this bargain buck
up with a gravy chip get up Netflix and
chill and I’ve got a sofa bed no y’all
just snap like some fella myself with
garlic bread me there’s like 30
different ways for me to find you
I’ve just noticed you have the same
second name
you must have married her my life will
never be the same
how could you do this to us do you’ve no
decency my hashtag against the base
hashtag and stir betrayed me so I slide
into your DMS that’s direct message guys
and as I wait for your reply tears are
falling both my eyes I wrote I can’t
believe you married
Kylie loved her held or kissed her you
replied I don’t know who you are
the Kylie is my sister
so it could be me in your Instagram feed
and should be see having 50 weeks sleep
in your photos for days baby let’s just
get in gates there’s like 30 different
ways for me to find your address thank
you so much for listening [Applause]
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