[Music]
so many years ago I was sitting on a
park bench in New York City when I
received a phone call from my agent now
I was always happy when his name
appeared on my touch screen because it
meant I had an audition or a callback
but that afternoon he wasn’t calling
about either there was a tension in his
voice as he muscled to push out the
words Nick we’re letting you go
we’ve decided to no longer represent you
man I remember my hands got tight and my
stomach got stiff I felt dazed like I’ve
been sucker-punched just like that I was
on my own now a few months before I
thought it would only be a matter of
time before I graces stages of the
Barrymore and Schubert theatres on
Broadway you see all I ever wanted to be
was a storyteller and as a young man I
didn’t appreciate my limitations and as
a result I became fueled by white rage
over what I felt was unfair
it wasn’t until I hit my spiritual rock
bottom that I realized I needed the
focus on what I could control and be
liberated like what I couldn’t now in
time it became very clear that there are
only a few factors that I can control
but if used effectively to turn setbacks
into opportunities these are a
collection of lessons that I’ve learned
over the past twelve years that I call
the four truths of creating your own
opportunities number one do not wait now
for years I sat by the phone hoping that
the perfect part would magically land in
my lap while other actors were building
up their arsenal skills through writing
and producing and directing I was being
left behind
I wasn’t diversifying my expertise in my
field of interest
I wasn’t thinking creatively in a
creative industry so I grew stale while
others learned to adapt and change the
rules and take action to get their
voices heard and they taught me that my
story would never be told unless I wrote
it and with action came an awakening to
my potential now instead of just
tweeting one more encouraging quote
we’re listening to another motivational
speaker I understood that clarity of
purpose came from doing
and not talking I started tinkering with
different platforms I discipline myself
to write every single day even if it was
awful
my first screenplays were so bad my
friends didn’t even know where to begin
with their feedback my first attempt at
getting a literary agent was met by well
over a hundred rejections and my short
films were passed on by so many
festivals that I lost count but by not
taking those failures personally and
reframing them is deferred successes I
continued to write blogs articles plays
one-man shows and even a book and as I
develop my voice my confidence grew
convincing me that I had something of
value to offer suddenly I become a
three-dimensional storyteller I knew a
little about a lot by building up my
skillset and taking action I’d become
the captain of my own ship rather than
just a passive tourist but the best part
was seeing out taking action and Boldin
those around me to do the same friends
saw that if I could do it they could do
it too
now I was being asked to edit their
articles read their plays and
collaborate on their films and in the
process we built a community what we
felt invested in one another’s success
we had each other’s backs supported on
one another’s vision and held each other
accountable to making something happen
number two build the right philosophy
now before I went to college my father
told me there is no excuse for skipping
class you can get a C just for showing
up now his point was that half a success
in life comes from the quality of our
presence we have a choice in how we show
up and the foundation is our philosophy
now in shaping my own I drew from three
main tenets first their time is limited
in the summer of 2013 I traveled to a
small village in South Africa called
senseof village now after the program
ended I decided to rent a car and drive
to a city called Port Elizabeth a few
minutes into the drive I turned on the
radio but heard nothing but static and
just as I was about to shut it off I
turned the dial one last time and I was
greeted by the booming voice of a South
African preacher in the middle of his
sermon
take my house take my money you can even
take all my cars he said but please do
not take my time do not take my time
because that I cannot replace a second
Slater the station lost reception and
mysteriously faded out that moment
changed my life I had never thought of
my time in quite those terms before but
when I returned to the states I became
incredibly selective with where I
invested my energy if a product didn’t
help me grow forge meaningful
relationships or give me personal
fulfillment it had to go your life is
flying by don’t waste another moment
making the unimportant important or
falling into the trap of thinking you
always have until tomorrow second if
someone doesn’t understand your dreams
it’s not your problem no matter what you
do there will never be universal
consensus that it’s an endeavor worth
pursuing not everybody is going to get
what you’re trying to do and that’s okay
we shouldn’t judge what we under don’t
understand but we do so if you are
around in community people who criticize
more than they contribute and they don’t
understand your need to sing to write to
act the play to start a business or
travel the world and it’s time to find a
group of people who do because it’s not
your job to be a molder of consensus or
a seeker of validation but rather it is
your responsibility to share your unique
gifts with those who need to hear them
most third to not fear failure without a
doubt the greatest gift that being an
actor has given me is having zero fear
of losing
learning to fall madly in love with
failure is crucial now what I learned in
an industry where you’re told no 99% of
the time is that failure is not a
testament to your character your
self-worth or even your talent it’s just
feedback a way to assess where you are
and where you need to be but the
greatest takeaway was that failure was
not my problem my reaction to it was
being told no maybe next time we’re
gonna pass used to put me in a tailspin
but as I got older I learned to take
those setbacks in stride
and use them as building blocks to great
a character the third truth for creating
opportunities is to avoid toxic people I
once had a friend who could convinced me
the world was going to pieces just by
the way he said hello he only saw the
downside of up and often wondered why he
couldn’t find his path in life
and each time I tried to convince him
look at things in a more positive light
he’d say I’m just being realistic now
over time I didn’t like who I was
becoming when we would hang out I
started talking badly about people I
loved I complained about everything
under the Sun and I strayed far from my
core values in an effort to placate him
each time we parted ways I had an
emotional deficit that I needed to dig
out of now eventually I had to limit our
associations even though I cared about
his well-being now the truth is anybody
can find reasons to complain but it
takes courage to focus on possibility
and it doesn’t mean being unrealistic or
diluted because you can leverage your
strengths while still being a shrewd
judge of your shortcomings
the fourth truth of creating
opportunities is to flow rather than
muscle spend a few minutes on any social
media platform and you’re likely to come
across a hashtag followed by the words
hustle and grime right form
entrepreneurs athletes there is
undoubtedly a culture of no days off
being promoted and though there is no
substitute for hard hard work they can
come at a great cost if not accompanied
by a dose of self-awareness now as a
young acting student I would arrive to
theater each morning at 5:30 a.m. for
ten blocks
I would pound on my chest with clenched
fists roaring at the top of my lungs
come on you either want it or you don’t
now thankfully New York City was the
only place where I could behave like
that and still blend in right but
nothing gave me greater delight than
being the first to sign my name on the
check-in sheet at the theater I would
write my name and big easy-to-read
letters so everybody could see and then
I would tiptoe pass a sleeping guard to
avoid an argument of which there were
many why do you need to be here so early
they would ask I have work to do I’d say
now in my obsessive pursuit of becoming
a working actor my determination reads
many rewards but left me bankrupt in the
big picture arenas of life family
relationships and self care I chose
solitude over community and competition
over camaraderie then one morning I
would meet a man who would flip
everything I knew about hustle on its
head for the next several years he
schooled me on the importance of living
a life and not just a career every day
come rain sleet or snow he’d hop on the
metro-north from his home in Connecticut
and commute to midtown Manhattan and for
the next 10 hours he would audition he
would teach he would take classes and
just before his late for a into acting
he abandoned the peace of mind that
comes from supporting a family on a
well-paying and steady job and each time
he saw me get worked up over a blown
audition or complain about not seeing
the fruits of my labor
he would remind me there was more to
life than being on Law & Order he taught
me that you couldn’t want something
without meeting it a realization that
not only liberated me made the work more
enjoyable and not surprisingly the
second I stopped trying to build those
my way to my dreams I started to book
more work now over the years I saw
countless plays in New York Broadway
giants like Frank Langella and Tracy
Bennett left me in awe inspiring me to
push the envelope in my own work but
their performances paled in comparison
to the way this man lived his life
offstage he beamed every time he talked
about his children he took the work
seriously but never himself and always
responded that he was doing awesome when
asked about his well-being
but the greatest lesson he imparted was
that you can be happy while striving
towards your dreams and that it was not
a form of complacency his point was that
joy could not be postponed for some
professional achievement his point was
that happiness was not the byproduct of
accomplishment but rather the pursuit of
a meaningful life so how do you flow
rather than muscle well I want you guys
a picture a river racing through a
valley
it never flattens the boulder in its way
it simply moves above around or below
while still reaching its destination
there’s still great effort and momentum
but in a way that incorporates those
obstacles as part of the journey and the
flow should be inclusive because when we
lift each other up rather than leave
them behind the taming of our goals
becomes much more about impact and
self-importance it becomes about
becoming more rather than just gaining
more so there you have it the four
choose your not weight know the right
philosophy avoid talks of people and
flow rather than muscle together those
four choose have the potential to make
remarkable things happen thank you guys
so so much let’s so appreciate it
[Applause]
so many years ago I was sitting on a
park bench in New York City when I
received a phone call from my agent now
I was always happy when his name
appeared on my touch screen because it
meant I had an audition or a callback
but that afternoon he wasn’t calling
about either there was a tension in his
voice as he muscled to push out the
words Nick we’re letting you go
we’ve decided to no longer represent you
man I remember my hands got tight and my
stomach got stiff I felt dazed like I’ve
been sucker-punched just like that I was
on my own now a few months before I
thought it would only be a matter of
time before I graces stages of the
Barrymore and Schubert theatres on
Broadway you see all I ever wanted to be
was a storyteller and as a young man I
didn’t appreciate my limitations and as
a result I became fueled by white rage
over what I felt was unfair
it wasn’t until I hit my spiritual rock
bottom that I realized I needed the
focus on what I could control and be
liberated like what I couldn’t now in
time it became very clear that there are
only a few factors that I can control
but if used effectively to turn setbacks
into opportunities these are a
collection of lessons that I’ve learned
over the past twelve years that I call
the four truths of creating your own
opportunities number one do not wait now
for years I sat by the phone hoping that
the perfect part would magically land in
my lap while other actors were building
up their arsenal skills through writing
and producing and directing I was being
left behind
I wasn’t diversifying my expertise in my
field of interest
I wasn’t thinking creatively in a
creative industry so I grew stale while
others learned to adapt and change the
rules and take action to get their
voices heard and they taught me that my
story would never be told unless I wrote
it and with action came an awakening to
my potential now instead of just
tweeting one more encouraging quote
we’re listening to another motivational
speaker I understood that clarity of
purpose came from doing
and not talking I started tinkering with
different platforms I discipline myself
to write every single day even if it was
awful
my first screenplays were so bad my
friends didn’t even know where to begin
with their feedback my first attempt at
getting a literary agent was met by well
over a hundred rejections and my short
films were passed on by so many
festivals that I lost count but by not
taking those failures personally and
reframing them is deferred successes I
continued to write blogs articles plays
one-man shows and even a book and as I
develop my voice my confidence grew
convincing me that I had something of
value to offer suddenly I become a
three-dimensional storyteller I knew a
little about a lot by building up my
skillset and taking action I’d become
the captain of my own ship rather than
just a passive tourist but the best part
was seeing out taking action and Boldin
those around me to do the same friends
saw that if I could do it they could do
it too
now I was being asked to edit their
articles read their plays and
collaborate on their films and in the
process we built a community what we
felt invested in one another’s success
we had each other’s backs supported on
one another’s vision and held each other
accountable to making something happen
number two build the right philosophy
now before I went to college my father
told me there is no excuse for skipping
class you can get a C just for showing
up now his point was that half a success
in life comes from the quality of our
presence we have a choice in how we show
up and the foundation is our philosophy
now in shaping my own I drew from three
main tenets first their time is limited
in the summer of 2013 I traveled to a
small village in South Africa called
senseof village now after the program
ended I decided to rent a car and drive
to a city called Port Elizabeth a few
minutes into the drive I turned on the
radio but heard nothing but static and
just as I was about to shut it off I
turned the dial one last time and I was
greeted by the booming voice of a South
African preacher in the middle of his
sermon
take my house take my money you can even
take all my cars he said but please do
not take my time do not take my time
because that I cannot replace a second
Slater the station lost reception and
mysteriously faded out that moment
changed my life I had never thought of
my time in quite those terms before but
when I returned to the states I became
incredibly selective with where I
invested my energy if a product didn’t
help me grow forge meaningful
relationships or give me personal
fulfillment it had to go your life is
flying by don’t waste another moment
making the unimportant important or
falling into the trap of thinking you
always have until tomorrow second if
someone doesn’t understand your dreams
it’s not your problem no matter what you
do there will never be universal
consensus that it’s an endeavor worth
pursuing not everybody is going to get
what you’re trying to do and that’s okay
we shouldn’t judge what we under don’t
understand but we do so if you are
around in community people who criticize
more than they contribute and they don’t
understand your need to sing to write to
act the play to start a business or
travel the world and it’s time to find a
group of people who do because it’s not
your job to be a molder of consensus or
a seeker of validation but rather it is
your responsibility to share your unique
gifts with those who need to hear them
most third to not fear failure without a
doubt the greatest gift that being an
actor has given me is having zero fear
of losing
learning to fall madly in love with
failure is crucial now what I learned in
an industry where you’re told no 99% of
the time is that failure is not a
testament to your character your
self-worth or even your talent it’s just
feedback a way to assess where you are
and where you need to be but the
greatest takeaway was that failure was
not my problem my reaction to it was
being told no maybe next time we’re
gonna pass used to put me in a tailspin
but as I got older I learned to take
those setbacks in stride
and use them as building blocks to great
a character the third truth for creating
opportunities is to avoid toxic people I
once had a friend who could convinced me
the world was going to pieces just by
the way he said hello he only saw the
downside of up and often wondered why he
couldn’t find his path in life
and each time I tried to convince him
look at things in a more positive light
he’d say I’m just being realistic now
over time I didn’t like who I was
becoming when we would hang out I
started talking badly about people I
loved I complained about everything
under the Sun and I strayed far from my
core values in an effort to placate him
each time we parted ways I had an
emotional deficit that I needed to dig
out of now eventually I had to limit our
associations even though I cared about
his well-being now the truth is anybody
can find reasons to complain but it
takes courage to focus on possibility
and it doesn’t mean being unrealistic or
diluted because you can leverage your
strengths while still being a shrewd
judge of your shortcomings
the fourth truth of creating
opportunities is to flow rather than
muscle spend a few minutes on any social
media platform and you’re likely to come
across a hashtag followed by the words
hustle and grime right form
entrepreneurs athletes there is
undoubtedly a culture of no days off
being promoted and though there is no
substitute for hard hard work they can
come at a great cost if not accompanied
by a dose of self-awareness now as a
young acting student I would arrive to
theater each morning at 5:30 a.m. for
ten blocks
I would pound on my chest with clenched
fists roaring at the top of my lungs
come on you either want it or you don’t
now thankfully New York City was the
only place where I could behave like
that and still blend in right but
nothing gave me greater delight than
being the first to sign my name on the
check-in sheet at the theater I would
write my name and big easy-to-read
letters so everybody could see and then
I would tiptoe pass a sleeping guard to
avoid an argument of which there were
many why do you need to be here so early
they would ask I have work to do I’d say
now in my obsessive pursuit of becoming
a working actor my determination reads
many rewards but left me bankrupt in the
big picture arenas of life family
relationships and self care I chose
solitude over community and competition
over camaraderie then one morning I
would meet a man who would flip
everything I knew about hustle on its
head for the next several years he
schooled me on the importance of living
a life and not just a career every day
come rain sleet or snow he’d hop on the
metro-north from his home in Connecticut
and commute to midtown Manhattan and for
the next 10 hours he would audition he
would teach he would take classes and
just before his late for a into acting
he abandoned the peace of mind that
comes from supporting a family on a
well-paying and steady job and each time
he saw me get worked up over a blown
audition or complain about not seeing
the fruits of my labor
he would remind me there was more to
life than being on Law & Order he taught
me that you couldn’t want something
without meeting it a realization that
not only liberated me made the work more
enjoyable and not surprisingly the
second I stopped trying to build those
my way to my dreams I started to book
more work now over the years I saw
countless plays in New York Broadway
giants like Frank Langella and Tracy
Bennett left me in awe inspiring me to
push the envelope in my own work but
their performances paled in comparison
to the way this man lived his life
offstage he beamed every time he talked
about his children he took the work
seriously but never himself and always
responded that he was doing awesome when
asked about his well-being
but the greatest lesson he imparted was
that you can be happy while striving
towards your dreams and that it was not
a form of complacency his point was that
joy could not be postponed for some
professional achievement his point was
that happiness was not the byproduct of
accomplishment but rather the pursuit of
a meaningful life so how do you flow
rather than muscle well I want you guys
a picture a river racing through a
valley
it never flattens the boulder in its way
it simply moves above around or below
while still reaching its destination
there’s still great effort and momentum
but in a way that incorporates those
obstacles as part of the journey and the
flow should be inclusive because when we
lift each other up rather than leave
them behind the taming of our goals
becomes much more about impact and
self-importance it becomes about
becoming more rather than just gaining
more so there you have it the four
choose your not weight know the right
philosophy avoid talks of people and
flow rather than muscle together those
four choose have the potential to make
remarkable things happen thank you guys
so so much let’s so appreciate it
[Applause]
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