tell me when I was about two years old
sitting at my grandparents dinner table
and pointing excitedly at the window
saying cat over and over again despite
how hard everyone tried to find the cat
that I so clearly saw it took about two
minutes for them to realize that it was
just a shape in the window created from
how to trick the curtain straight it
wasn’t long after that that my parents
began to noticed that I visually picked
up on things that they failed to see
although I couldn’t even remember the
names of my closest friends until mid
grade school I could describe everything
that they wore that day or find specific
facial features that two unrelated
people had in common as I made my way
through school I realized that my best
note-taking strategy was one that
involved colors and diagrams and
pictures by the end of the lesson my
paper would look something like this and
these are pretty mild examples I
remember telling my mom that I learned
better when teachers dressed
interestingly or when with colors and
accessories or when they used two or
more colors on the whiteboard
I noticed the smallest visual details in
my day-to-day day-to-day lives like when
someone cuts their fingernails or the
computer screen is a little bit cleaner
than the day before
with such a visual brain I’ve also
experienced many challenges in writing
math and conversational skills I’ve
often felt embarrassed about my work
which meant that I was less likely to
get the help that I so desperately
needed in middle school where I
frequently found myself in the middle of
large groups with multiple conversations
going on
I found myself one beat behind and as a
tall awkward tween whose ears stuck out
a little bit too much this proved to be
really difficult especially as
friendships began to rely more on
conversations and rather on shared
activities especially during this time
was when I fell in love with dance my
ability to express myself using my body
and visuals rather than just saying
things these challenges let me reflect
on and explore what was actually going
on in my brain and through some research
I found that I have a rare condition
called synesthesia synesthesia is often
referred to as the blending of senses
such as one’s hearing sight or taste as
dr. Veronica Gross from Boston
University explains it is synesthesia as
when a certain part of the senses
activated and then another unrelated
part of the sense is activated as well
around one in 2,000 people one in every
two thousand people are estimated to
have synesthesia and it’s thought to be
caused by the hyperexcitability of
neurons in the primary visual cortex
this results in some people tasting
colors or hearing sound are seeing sound
and for me this hyperexcitability of
neurons in the visual cortex manifests
Met manifests in almost every number and
color having a corresponding way every
number and letter having a corresponding
color and personality before knowing
what synesthesia was or that someone
could be a sinister I thought this was
how everyone’s brain worked I thought
everyone knew that the number three was
green and that the number eight was a
purpley blue and the eight hated the
number six and seven I thought people
knew that my name was a pink lemonade or
sometimes a lavender but if you take out
the extra Ellen E it turns into a
completely different color I assume
people chose their favorite numbers by
choosing the ones that had the most
interesting color
so naturally mine’s 57 because it’s a
perfect blend of orange pink and red it
reminds me of a cartoon desert or family
road trips to my grandparents house I
didn’t realize that in an image like
this doesn’t make everyone’s skin crawl
because the number two isn’t red it’s
yellow there’s not an abundance of
research on synesthesia but what we do
know is synesthetes are obviously highly
visual people
synesthesia can be developmental or
acquired which means you can be born
with it or you can experience it in
certain situations it’s found in
families its genetic and has a pattern
Mendelian transmission scientists the
oxford university figured that with
individuals with synesthesia required
far lower levels of stimulation in there
to see streaks of light in their vision
so basically the amount of stimulation
it takes for your brain to react to
something is the is your threshold by
using electric currents in parts of the
brain researchers came to the conclusion
that because synesthetes have a
naturally lower visual threshold
easier for neurons to be fired and then
correlate with another sense or
experience when I began to understand
the unique way that my brain worked I
was able to experience more self
compassion for areas in which I
struggled in I was no longer embarrassed
by my writing skills knowing it wasn’t a
reflection of my intelligence but simply
a skill set that I fundamentally
struggled with this new information
helped my parents learn and expel my
parents understand how I learned and
experience the world in fact as I was
talking my mom about synesthesia one
night my dad chimed in saying that he
experienced the same thing too and we
figured out that he had synesthesia as
well it was a profound realization that
to my mom after 20 years of marriage she
never understood that my dad experienced
the world in this way and it turns out
he sees his day like a movie reel where
each scene of his day is depicted with
extreme visual detail so when asked a
simple question how was your day he’s
required to sift through massive amounts
of information and then translate this
information into words this process can
make his response delayed sometimes
which can be frustrated to both him and
whomever is listening because of this
conversation with my parents my dad and
I created a closer bond and my mom
someone’s whose brain works more
verbally was able to understand how we
interact and experience the world with
my newfound understanding and compassion
I began to be okay with where I was with
my writing and conversation abilities
and gave myself permission to make
mistakes in my attempt to improve
because the people around me understood
me better I was no longer apprehensive
to share my work knowing that they’d be
patient and appreciative of my efforts
over time I even began to challenge
myself I understood the importance of
being able to communicate clearly in all
aspects of my life so I decided to take
AP language as well as journalism as a
way to strengthen my writing and
communication abilities neither of these
classes have been very easy for me but
with hard work teacher and editor
feedback and support I found growth
growth and success and ways unimaginable
to my middle school self our natural
assumption that we all experience the
world in the same way as a barrier to
progress understanding and connection
sure not everyone has a random hard to
pronounce neurological condition like
synesthesia
but all of us have something unique
about how our brains work maybe you find
that you’re an auditory learner or feel
most comfortable when things are
explained to you out loud maybe you find
that you need absolutely zero
distractions when you’re doing your math
homework like music or noise or maybe
for you biological systems are best
understood with the video all of our
preferences strengths and areas of
struggle are valid and should be
encouraged and we should encourage
others to address them in the most
non-judgmental ways as possible knowing
that what if we all started having
conversations with their friends and
family about the ways our brains work or
how we experience the world how would it
feel if our teachers understood us each
on a deeper level
how what if we saw our perceived
weaknesses in the context of our
strengths or solve them as um sell them
as opportunities rather than obstacles
taking a few minutes to think about how
your unique self can be the key to your
success in the future try it when you’re
driving your car or brushing your teeth
think about the way your brain works and
how you experience the world and then
reflect and then once you self reflect
you must share these findings with those
around you like I did with my family or
my dad did with my mom
keeping these poor important self
discoveries to ourselves might cut us
off from benefiting the from the way
that our brains work once you do this
you might even be surprised about what
you learn about yourself and those you
care about
you may even be surprised about what you
accomplish once you know yourself better
thank you
[Applause] [Music]