I have time to spare celebrating a life
I’m volunteer a so-called final
companion where I sit with strangers in
their final hours in order that they
don’t have to die alone the conviction
that no one should have to die alone is
that is why I’m talking to you today
about these deeply personal experiences
at a time when family lovers friends is
unable to be there
God knows hospital employees and other
people like that their workload is so
heavy these days they have no time to do
it and that’s when we the final
companions come in years ago many years
ago I was diagnosed with a brain tumor
and lying there in my absolute stupor I
started thinking about the people that I
have actually loved in my life coming to
the conclusion in the midst of this that
it really would be okay if I did not
wake up after the operation I was alone
when I went to the hospital I was alone
when they rolled me into the surgery and
waking up 23 hours later I all of a
sudden sensed that this unbelievable
pressure had been relieved from my skull
I sense daylight for the first time in
um teens I don’t know what
all of a sudden I registered that there
being alone all of a sudden no longer
mattered I stand in a hallway
taking a deep breath and I walk into
this room lighting as the rule is
lowered I see in front of me
this ancient person lying in bed a woman
she’s clean and she’s neat and the duvet
is covering her all the way from her
standing there beside her I go hi I’m
Ophir I’m going to be sitting here with
you for the next few hours I see an old
face she’s alive she’s a very pale
and her eyes are closed and I wonder if
she is not the oldest person I’ve
actually ever met that woman in the last
hours of her life so I sit down
hold her hand if possible if I can find
it but there’s no reaction I don’t know
if she heard me or not I just don’t that
I a total stranger is now sitting beside
her to ensure that she is safe and
protected it’s all nonverbal so I sit
there and I look around the room
I see photos on the wall I see bare
walls
once I remember a beautiful oil painting
hanging right above her head and oil
painting of a chrysanthemum that was
unusually beautiful and I told her about
it and a beauty it was and there was
silence but I think I prefer to think
that she heard what I said about that
slowly but surely my breathing goes into
a deep concentration really
synchronizing it with her because no
thought nothing else exists I appreciate
my ability to concentrate on a face
project peace towards her and while
doing that a calm comes over me the best
thing I can think of is that it is like
meditation but I don’t know I have never
tried real meditation so there I said
for four hours still following her
another final companion arise and it’s
time for me to go I wish her good night
I hope she sleeps well and I wish her
all the best and I it’s time to get up
it’s time to walk out thinking really
well it was a job well done I do know
that at that point I feel better I feel
much more at ease than when I arrived
and that was it
the kindness and the gratitude on behalf
of the medical staff and what other
employees may be in these institutions
is simply profound they are so happy
that we are able to do what they are not
able to do in a person’s last moments I
have no idea what they see what they
hear let alone what they comprehend I do
not know what happens but I hope they
have positive feelings I hope a lot that
they feel prepared and they are
comfortable and even that they may have
sensed all the positive feelings that
I’ve been projecting towards them but I
don’t know once I remember supporting an
arm attempting to find a pulse and I as
I was doing that all of a sudden I
sensed that the arm I was supporting had
become dead weight then it was time to
[Applause]
setting sun is smaller burning down like
a cigarette put out on the horizon on
the night front step days are cool
longer I still fear the dark though I
should nobody know it don’t fight as bad
as it bars not a minute goes by where I
don’t it’s your smile but it’s times
like these makes it easier to breathe
[Music]
there’s something bout the moment in
between like the beauty in the gray sky
gets you through the ring take the bad
with the good they are
[Music]
there’s something about the Twilight
that gets you through my
people coming home in a fatal afternoon
though the workday is just starting for
the man in the moon he’s turning on the
Stars a thousand shades of gold I’m just
sitting
I listen to the weight of the world
melts away for little while and that
magic half an hour where day might
collide something bout the moment in
between the pain like the beauty and a
grey sky gets you through the rain take
the bad with the good
[Music]
there’s something bout the Twilight that
gets you through the night
[Music]
there’s something bout the moment will
you forget to cry like the beauty that
reminds you to remember your life take
the bad with the good they are wrong
[Music]
there’s something bout the Twilight that gets you through the night
I’m volunteer a so-called final
companion where I sit with strangers in
their final hours in order that they
don’t have to die alone the conviction
that no one should have to die alone is
that is why I’m talking to you today
about these deeply personal experiences
at a time when family lovers friends is
unable to be there
God knows hospital employees and other
people like that their workload is so
heavy these days they have no time to do
it and that’s when we the final
companions come in years ago many years
ago I was diagnosed with a brain tumor
and lying there in my absolute stupor I
started thinking about the people that I
have actually loved in my life coming to
the conclusion in the midst of this that
it really would be okay if I did not
wake up after the operation I was alone
when I went to the hospital I was alone
when they rolled me into the surgery and
waking up 23 hours later I all of a
sudden sensed that this unbelievable
pressure had been relieved from my skull
I sense daylight for the first time in
um teens I don’t know what
all of a sudden I registered that there
being alone all of a sudden no longer
mattered I stand in a hallway
taking a deep breath and I walk into
this room lighting as the rule is
lowered I see in front of me
this ancient person lying in bed a woman
she’s clean and she’s neat and the duvet
is covering her all the way from her
standing there beside her I go hi I’m
Ophir I’m going to be sitting here with
you for the next few hours I see an old
face she’s alive she’s a very pale
and her eyes are closed and I wonder if
she is not the oldest person I’ve
actually ever met that woman in the last
hours of her life so I sit down
hold her hand if possible if I can find
it but there’s no reaction I don’t know
if she heard me or not I just don’t that
I a total stranger is now sitting beside
her to ensure that she is safe and
protected it’s all nonverbal so I sit
there and I look around the room
I see photos on the wall I see bare
walls
once I remember a beautiful oil painting
hanging right above her head and oil
painting of a chrysanthemum that was
unusually beautiful and I told her about
it and a beauty it was and there was
silence but I think I prefer to think
that she heard what I said about that
slowly but surely my breathing goes into
a deep concentration really
synchronizing it with her because no
thought nothing else exists I appreciate
my ability to concentrate on a face
project peace towards her and while
doing that a calm comes over me the best
thing I can think of is that it is like
meditation but I don’t know I have never
tried real meditation so there I said
for four hours still following her
another final companion arise and it’s
time for me to go I wish her good night
I hope she sleeps well and I wish her
all the best and I it’s time to get up
it’s time to walk out thinking really
well it was a job well done I do know
that at that point I feel better I feel
much more at ease than when I arrived
and that was it
the kindness and the gratitude on behalf
of the medical staff and what other
employees may be in these institutions
is simply profound they are so happy
that we are able to do what they are not
able to do in a person’s last moments I
have no idea what they see what they
hear let alone what they comprehend I do
not know what happens but I hope they
have positive feelings I hope a lot that
they feel prepared and they are
comfortable and even that they may have
sensed all the positive feelings that
I’ve been projecting towards them but I
don’t know once I remember supporting an
arm attempting to find a pulse and I as
I was doing that all of a sudden I
sensed that the arm I was supporting had
become dead weight then it was time to
[Applause]
setting sun is smaller burning down like
a cigarette put out on the horizon on
the night front step days are cool
longer I still fear the dark though I
should nobody know it don’t fight as bad
as it bars not a minute goes by where I
don’t it’s your smile but it’s times
like these makes it easier to breathe
[Music]
there’s something bout the moment in
between like the beauty in the gray sky
gets you through the ring take the bad
with the good they are
[Music]
there’s something about the Twilight
that gets you through my
people coming home in a fatal afternoon
though the workday is just starting for
the man in the moon he’s turning on the
Stars a thousand shades of gold I’m just
sitting
I listen to the weight of the world
melts away for little while and that
magic half an hour where day might
collide something bout the moment in
between the pain like the beauty and a
grey sky gets you through the rain take
the bad with the good
[Music]
there’s something bout the Twilight that
gets you through the night
[Music]
there’s something bout the moment will
you forget to cry like the beauty that
reminds you to remember your life take
the bad with the good they are wrong
[Music]
there’s something bout the Twilight that gets you through the night
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