every day in our society children a loss
to gangs drugs human trafficking in
prison some of the parents of these
children have a similar story
they were straight-a students on I
enrolled involved in church or the
community yet they still succumbed to
these tragedies without their parents
noticing any signs of decline until it
was too late to step in today is not too
late for your parents out there I had a
second chance to be a better parent from
the most unlikely of places I got my
second chance to be a better parent a
parent that I needed to have as a youth
my childhood started good I had both
parents in the home we had family
dinners together my mom my dad my big
brother both sisters and me
I remember family outings like amusement
parks or fishing trips were the best I
was a happy child until one day my world
came crashing down
my mom was accused of trying to kill me
when I was 7 and this tore my family
apart when I got to a hospital
my mom and dad went through a bit of
divorce and my dad was granted custody
of my younger sister in me all that I
was left with of my mom were memories
and nightmares and my nightmares are
fall for my mom and I searched for her
through the tears I knew my mom then
tried to kill me I remember that night
better than I remember yesterday I had a
very bad headache and she simply gave me
the wrong pain medication from that day
forward there were no more motherly hugs
or kisses the gentleness and my life was
gone so my dad ex-con biker and water by
trade took on the challenge of being a
single parent an action I’ve always
respected about him whether he succeeded
or not I believe he was the best parent
that he knew how to be
you see my dad was in the motorcycle
club so growing up I would see the club
colors the leather jackets and boots
worn by the six foot four two hundred
and seventy pound giant on the
motorcycle I saw my dad was this big
tough dude like most young sons I want
to be just like my dad my hero so I’m
put on this tough image but this isn’t
appeal to my dad he would often say to
me son I want you to be better than me
stay in school get good grades but a
good grades I got but being better than
him confuse me he was my own example of
what a man and a parent is supposed to
be as a parent my dad in various
stepmothers ruled with an iron fist
every era I made was devil with
whoopings and punishments I never had a
voice or an opinion the adult was always
right I began to feel like an extra in a
lifelong movie whose role was actually
insignificant coupled with these
stressors and my dad spent a long hours
at work and at his motorcycle club led
me to seek male companionship in the
streets a gang of guys in my
neighborhood soon became my surrogate
family and my dad’s absence they didn’t
judge me nor condemn me these guys were
like like a brotherhood and their way of
life
so became my way of life drugs alcohol
weapons and crime my new life in the
streets crossed my world to grow dark so
dark I couldn’t see past her life and
although surrounded by my new family I
feel all alone and not a meaningless
point because deep down inside I wanted
more everything seemed meaningless to me
even my dreams are going to technical
school I was in love with the mystery
about things like computers games and
wireless devices work so I would take
electrons apart one day my dad came into
my room and he noticed I took apart the
cable box and a video game he said what
wait you better put that back together
and I did here just as they were before
like a damaged computer chip my brain
still retains some of this data of what
I once aspired to do with my life but
now
it seemed out of reach at times I will
break down and cry whenever I will
remember who I once wanted to be because
I just didn’t order started my life over
I felt I was in too deep a lost cause
there were many nights when I would find
myself pregnant in the streetlights
years before the rapper Coolio rapped
that verse in a song and his paradise
this adopted lifestyle landed me in
prison with a life without the
possibility of parole sentence at the
tender age of 20 for the past 26 years
of my incarceration I’ve had to dissect
every examine every part of my
adolescent years to see what went wrong
and what if anything could have been
done to prevent my life from turning out
as it did wasting so much potential
well I found my answer I needed more for
my parents that helped me prepare for
the critical stages in my life growing
up I was told I’m your parent not your
friend my job at the feed clothe and put
a roof over your head well as a parent
myself today
I can tell you it’s a lot more to it
than nine and I’ve successfully
co-parent in my own children from prison
through letters phone calls and
visitation the parent that I needed
growing up is the parent that I am today
although incarcerated I knew early on if
I fell or succeeded I raised my own
children heals entirely on me so
everything that I didn’t get as a child
I give to my children I establish
communication with my children allowing
them to have a voice and an opinion
without repercussions in order to really
get to know them I give my children
friendship not dictatorship to establish
trust I had to change my behavior
leading by example so on be hypocrite in
their eyes my wife and I both got GEDs a
college education today my wife is a
nurse I let myself be vulnerable we’ve
given to my children my own eras growing
up as well as my own imperfections
because my mission as a parent is not
the punish or simply give orders but
they help them navigate through life I
had to be open to who or what they want
to be in life and help
to get there for that joint success one
of my daughters came and said that she
wants to be a lawyer so my wife went out
got his nice suits we put in this legal
program they did mock trials and a class
setting changed her outlook on life my
younger daughter who’s a mediator will
being my wife have issues says she wants
to be a psychologist
well she graduates this year at a 4.0
and next year should be going to college
to pursue a psych degree where we fail
as parents the gangs the drug builders
the pimps and human traffickers and the
prison system succeeds I’ve taken our
children the gangs are the illusion of
surrogate families that accept our
children with all their flaws without
judgment or condemnation the drug
dealers provide the sensation of
pleasure false happiness and escape the
pimps in human traffickers offer a false
sense of Independence loyalty protection
and financial security to the naive
young girls our daughters the reasons
why children fall prey to these
strangers if some parents leave no room
for error and purgatory within the home
is what is offered over understanding as
parents one can go overboard stripping
away a child’s identity and character to
meet our own expectations for life we
cannot live the last thing I needed to
do as a parent what the pretended I was
perfect that I never made mistakes and
this one caused my child to feel shame
or fear when they make mistakes and they
may simply withdraw until their own
world of safety never confiding to me in
the crisis I learned the best way to
identify with my children is to revisit
my childhood and make note of my wants
needs and desires growing up especially
my tears remember you were a child and
the same conflicts that arose then with
your parents are the same conflict or
the present today but somehow we forget
this although I may be in prison I got
my second chance to be a better parent
the man I should have been is the man
that I am today
I’m a better me
I have to be the best for my children I
am a success bound or free second
chances are raising the child is rare
our children’s future depend on us
parents more than we may ever know
I am the consequence that parents suffer
when they don’t help facilitate their
children’s dreams or refuse to provide
the necessary resources and time needed
for a child to accomplish their goals as
parents from the day our children are
born we are the launch pads for
everything dreamed up for their future
and success in life from this very hard
place I was able to give my children the
gentleness I needed for my mother so
from the comfort of your homes shouldn’t
you be able to provide the same for your
children this is not about you being a
bad parent it’s about me being a better
parent consider this most mammals in the
animal kingdom not only feed protect and
shelter their young but they teach them
what’s good to eat how to catch it were
predators to avoid and how to raise
their own young before they are pushed
from the nest driven out the cave or
from the pride so – for us civilized
human beings who owe our children beyond
food clothing and shelter everything
that they need to survive to thrive and
to raise their own children but they
love that supercedes parental and
maternal obligations as we prepare them
for life in a dull world I can only
imagine where I would be today have my
dad given me a book on computers or
electronics we would never know
[Applause] Oh
to gangs drugs human trafficking in
prison some of the parents of these
children have a similar story
they were straight-a students on I
enrolled involved in church or the
community yet they still succumbed to
these tragedies without their parents
noticing any signs of decline until it
was too late to step in today is not too
late for your parents out there I had a
second chance to be a better parent from
the most unlikely of places I got my
second chance to be a better parent a
parent that I needed to have as a youth
my childhood started good I had both
parents in the home we had family
dinners together my mom my dad my big
brother both sisters and me
I remember family outings like amusement
parks or fishing trips were the best I
was a happy child until one day my world
came crashing down
my mom was accused of trying to kill me
when I was 7 and this tore my family
apart when I got to a hospital
my mom and dad went through a bit of
divorce and my dad was granted custody
of my younger sister in me all that I
was left with of my mom were memories
and nightmares and my nightmares are
fall for my mom and I searched for her
through the tears I knew my mom then
tried to kill me I remember that night
better than I remember yesterday I had a
very bad headache and she simply gave me
the wrong pain medication from that day
forward there were no more motherly hugs
or kisses the gentleness and my life was
gone so my dad ex-con biker and water by
trade took on the challenge of being a
single parent an action I’ve always
respected about him whether he succeeded
or not I believe he was the best parent
that he knew how to be
you see my dad was in the motorcycle
club so growing up I would see the club
colors the leather jackets and boots
worn by the six foot four two hundred
and seventy pound giant on the
motorcycle I saw my dad was this big
tough dude like most young sons I want
to be just like my dad my hero so I’m
put on this tough image but this isn’t
appeal to my dad he would often say to
me son I want you to be better than me
stay in school get good grades but a
good grades I got but being better than
him confuse me he was my own example of
what a man and a parent is supposed to
be as a parent my dad in various
stepmothers ruled with an iron fist
every era I made was devil with
whoopings and punishments I never had a
voice or an opinion the adult was always
right I began to feel like an extra in a
lifelong movie whose role was actually
insignificant coupled with these
stressors and my dad spent a long hours
at work and at his motorcycle club led
me to seek male companionship in the
streets a gang of guys in my
neighborhood soon became my surrogate
family and my dad’s absence they didn’t
judge me nor condemn me these guys were
like like a brotherhood and their way of
life
so became my way of life drugs alcohol
weapons and crime my new life in the
streets crossed my world to grow dark so
dark I couldn’t see past her life and
although surrounded by my new family I
feel all alone and not a meaningless
point because deep down inside I wanted
more everything seemed meaningless to me
even my dreams are going to technical
school I was in love with the mystery
about things like computers games and
wireless devices work so I would take
electrons apart one day my dad came into
my room and he noticed I took apart the
cable box and a video game he said what
wait you better put that back together
and I did here just as they were before
like a damaged computer chip my brain
still retains some of this data of what
I once aspired to do with my life but
now
it seemed out of reach at times I will
break down and cry whenever I will
remember who I once wanted to be because
I just didn’t order started my life over
I felt I was in too deep a lost cause
there were many nights when I would find
myself pregnant in the streetlights
years before the rapper Coolio rapped
that verse in a song and his paradise
this adopted lifestyle landed me in
prison with a life without the
possibility of parole sentence at the
tender age of 20 for the past 26 years
of my incarceration I’ve had to dissect
every examine every part of my
adolescent years to see what went wrong
and what if anything could have been
done to prevent my life from turning out
as it did wasting so much potential
well I found my answer I needed more for
my parents that helped me prepare for
the critical stages in my life growing
up I was told I’m your parent not your
friend my job at the feed clothe and put
a roof over your head well as a parent
myself today
I can tell you it’s a lot more to it
than nine and I’ve successfully
co-parent in my own children from prison
through letters phone calls and
visitation the parent that I needed
growing up is the parent that I am today
although incarcerated I knew early on if
I fell or succeeded I raised my own
children heals entirely on me so
everything that I didn’t get as a child
I give to my children I establish
communication with my children allowing
them to have a voice and an opinion
without repercussions in order to really
get to know them I give my children
friendship not dictatorship to establish
trust I had to change my behavior
leading by example so on be hypocrite in
their eyes my wife and I both got GEDs a
college education today my wife is a
nurse I let myself be vulnerable we’ve
given to my children my own eras growing
up as well as my own imperfections
because my mission as a parent is not
the punish or simply give orders but
they help them navigate through life I
had to be open to who or what they want
to be in life and help
to get there for that joint success one
of my daughters came and said that she
wants to be a lawyer so my wife went out
got his nice suits we put in this legal
program they did mock trials and a class
setting changed her outlook on life my
younger daughter who’s a mediator will
being my wife have issues says she wants
to be a psychologist
well she graduates this year at a 4.0
and next year should be going to college
to pursue a psych degree where we fail
as parents the gangs the drug builders
the pimps and human traffickers and the
prison system succeeds I’ve taken our
children the gangs are the illusion of
surrogate families that accept our
children with all their flaws without
judgment or condemnation the drug
dealers provide the sensation of
pleasure false happiness and escape the
pimps in human traffickers offer a false
sense of Independence loyalty protection
and financial security to the naive
young girls our daughters the reasons
why children fall prey to these
strangers if some parents leave no room
for error and purgatory within the home
is what is offered over understanding as
parents one can go overboard stripping
away a child’s identity and character to
meet our own expectations for life we
cannot live the last thing I needed to
do as a parent what the pretended I was
perfect that I never made mistakes and
this one caused my child to feel shame
or fear when they make mistakes and they
may simply withdraw until their own
world of safety never confiding to me in
the crisis I learned the best way to
identify with my children is to revisit
my childhood and make note of my wants
needs and desires growing up especially
my tears remember you were a child and
the same conflicts that arose then with
your parents are the same conflict or
the present today but somehow we forget
this although I may be in prison I got
my second chance to be a better parent
the man I should have been is the man
that I am today
I’m a better me
I have to be the best for my children I
am a success bound or free second
chances are raising the child is rare
our children’s future depend on us
parents more than we may ever know
I am the consequence that parents suffer
when they don’t help facilitate their
children’s dreams or refuse to provide
the necessary resources and time needed
for a child to accomplish their goals as
parents from the day our children are
born we are the launch pads for
everything dreamed up for their future
and success in life from this very hard
place I was able to give my children the
gentleness I needed for my mother so
from the comfort of your homes shouldn’t
you be able to provide the same for your
children this is not about you being a
bad parent it’s about me being a better
parent consider this most mammals in the
animal kingdom not only feed protect and
shelter their young but they teach them
what’s good to eat how to catch it were
predators to avoid and how to raise
their own young before they are pushed
from the nest driven out the cave or
from the pride so – for us civilized
human beings who owe our children beyond
food clothing and shelter everything
that they need to survive to thrive and
to raise their own children but they
love that supercedes parental and
maternal obligations as we prepare them
for life in a dull world I can only
imagine where I would be today have my
dad given me a book on computers or
electronics we would never know
[Applause] Oh
Please follow and like us: