and
[Music]
when I was six
a man tried to sexually abuse
my
a worker who was working on a
Building my house asked me to
help him sanding a door and
I agreed happy stood behind me for
teach me how to do it and after
a while began to stick against my
body and rubbing against me when
I asked what he was doing
He undid his pants and began
touch me what you just heard
It was the beginning of one of the first
versions of this presentation was
It has been completely ruled out until
I went back and read part I
chilled her know what I give them a
track is not the part where you said
an adult man touched me against my
will when I was just a kid
but what I say
just before that they did not listen
I’ll say it once again when he was six
years
a man tried to sexually abuse
me are people what I said because I said
He tried and not simply abused
I Wear sexually years
writing about sexual violence and
genre but here I am alleged
Christ was a feminist reproducing
very limited ways of understanding
sexual assault against always
protested the issue is that I’m sure
I’m not the only one that happens
this
let’s do an experiment
you imagine when they hear the
words sexual assault
and take a second plot in a
image in his head has
I am sure that in this auditorium
one see my different answers but
I will encourage me to try a maybe
share many of you may
imagine a violation that goes something
less so
A woman screaming fights and wrestles
rabidly kicks against a man who
It is imposed violently on it
perhaps maybe subject hits
humans force behind his head
and I stopped to resist or
threatening with a knife that
avoid tea
If this is so
Maybe it’s because this is the image of
sexual assaults that we see
for example in films that are
terrible and definitely real but
what they would do if I told you that many of
stories of violence and aggression
sexual they not look anything like that
I just tell
if I told you that she said no but
he did not say so firmly and good
I think we all know what we have
Indeed life is that
women say no when really
we say yes or yes tell them
already said no but in the meantime
continues taking off her clothes lingerie
in these cases as forms of aggression
and sexual violence
The problem is that many of us
we have a misconception but not
deeply limited than is the
sexual violence and this happens for
simple reason is that we do not talk
sufficient grip thereon
our society has normalized
gender violence while it has
become taboo possibility
talk about it and when we talk
on it we do it in a way that
It is fully influenced by the cinema
television or the news and
result is that we consume violence
sexual as if it were one more way
entertainment rather than approach
she or empathy
This has three consequences each
worse than the other and feed
mutually in a vicious circle
first forcing women to
live their most painful moments in
silent as if they had to feel
ashamed of what they did
nor they asked second limit
deeply our understanding of
sexual violence and thirdly
prevents we can do something real and
effective to overcome this epidemic
because as we will change something neither
even know how to recognize a
and context in which women us
we have been forced to live our
stories of violence in silence
for centuries to break that silence does not
is only transformer level
staff but it is fundamental and
profoundly revolutionary
social and is precisely what level
what I want to talk today about
how one day a group of women
he decided to break the silence and what
we could accomplish if this event
Exceptional become a standard
perhaps many of you have heard
talk about one month
the march that took place 13
August this year but participated
They probably saw images
good news papers
hundreds of thousands of people
mainly women
We took to the streets of the city
capital and all regions of
country to make our voice heard
protest against a sexist society
and a state that in the best case
has been indifferent to us and the
accomplice worst aggressors as
official figures
the biggest march of our
story and if they were not there because
they’ll have to trust me word
It was overwhelming
complex and unforgettable touching
But today I’ll talk about another
thing currencies something not seen in
news because its power could not be
captured by a camera of a process
much quieter but not so
less powerful happened in the
weeks before the march when
We decided to convene a national march
of women
did what many of my generation
He does when he wants to get something later
we enter facebook at that time no
else we knew what was going to happen or
When mobilize and masters but decided
They create a group that invited our
friends to start organizing the
were beginning to ten or twelve hours
six hundred and one days after 2000
suddenly and did not pass many days
that happen to something that happened
we had never been able to imagine a
She left a message on the group
It would change everything went something
something I think is important to give a
step forward and coming out
This start was kidnapped
repeatedly raped and tortured ago
many years and until today he suffered stress
Posttraumatic for what happened to my
assailant was convicted of theft and
not aggravated rape case was not
taken into account
when we read that in the group was as
If the gates of a dam
They opened after centuries of having
been closed those words
screen were a cry of rebellion
against the silence that we have
tax and against the weight that we are
forced to shut that we are
when forced to carry silent
our stories his statement
generated a chain reaction
unstoppable one by one
first by scenes and then by
hundreds of women decided to leave the
closet and begin to tell their own
stories of violence
for that time and we were a group of
More than 60 thousand people
If I were asked to sum up in one
sentence what happened
I say it was an act of alchemy
that transformed the silence
solidarity and empathy for pain
first time we could speak and could
we hear stories that they had
kept secret for years or
decades suddenly ceased to be a
painful moment to live and relive
and privately and again they became
in testimony not only of violence
but of survival and resilience
The statistics of sexual violence
They ceased to be statistics and
They became flesh and blood women
women like me or they are
today sitting in this auditorium women
with stories imperfect women and
deeply human
who were lucky enough to live that
experience spent weeks in a
transformative kind of euphoria and
a single cathartic experience
lifetime
one by one through begin to heal
the power of words and
testimonials
we begin to discover our
stories in the stories of others
and be in the pain of those there
He wrote in our own stories
we begin to understand ourselves as part of
a network of stories much
wider and are as unique as
deeply interconnected by
the first time we knew that we were
alone who it was good at talking and other
women could and wanted to hear
when this woman decided to leave the
closet and break that silence made us
a gift reminded us that it is not fair
we are that we carry in
silence with local and weight not
It has made us as if we were
feel shame or guilt for what
we never ever ask ask
you imagine what saving a
secret for 20 years
I do if someone had told me ago
five years would one day be able to
stop you in front of a group of
strangers and tell the story of
sexual assault
Louis King of them for too
time I refused to share what I
He had happened to someone felt
shame as if I were responsible
what had happened to me as if I and
I just had the responsibility of
have gotten where apparently no
and he had gotten a grown man
touch my body but what girl
I discovered is that when we share
our stories begin a cycle
the nation that extends beyond
of us we have gone too
alone time without knowing that our
best allies are right
aside our
the first time I share
story of my sexual assault
publicly in an article
I received dozens of messages from women
they had never spoken to anyone
what had happened
some were women and I knew
life at school in my neighborhood
and even in my own family
each had a different story
but all said the same
I thought it was the only
So when we break the silence
we also say that we will not continue
we refuse accepting the
possibility of recognizing some in
other victims
yes but mostly as survivors
and if any of you are listening
this and think
not only their own experiences
I can tell you one thing to have the
absolute certainty that they are not alone
and its allies are much more
close to what you imagine
The second problem that this silence
It generates is deeply limiting
our understanding of what the
sexual violence
we have become accustomed to a narrative
only sexual assault and is
So we discard everything that is not
suits and that’s when
we begin to wonder why not
said no because not lost because no
He shouted why he did not report because they do not
It resisted what the diversity of
testimonials on page showed
however it is to pigeonhole
sexual assault on a single type of
experience or a single type of mold
It is impossible from the gory
even the most seemingly everyday
testimony in the group showed
to limit our understanding of
sexual assault than most
we imagine as a violation
It is not only absurd but also prevents
we can recognize the true
extent of the problem
we are all here agree that
a woman who was raped and dragged
on the floor by her partner is a
victim of violence
no one in their right mind would not be
I agree with that but what about
other stories about the
forms with the attacks that are
violent in a way that is not so
graphics or visible happens with
forms of violence that the law has
as defining or penalize for example
What about this story was my friend
I had never seen more than that
but it’s a little drunk and party
It was fun so we ended
kissing when I told him and me
I wanted to go
He told me we ordered one taxi together
I had my house we got to
car on the road but asked me to
We should go to your room to take
last drink
I told him I did not want but
He insisted and did not want to look like a
believed in his house began to kiss him
I said I did not like the way it was
my friend but did not stop when
turned face
He welcomed me with hands and continues
He started kissing me take off my clothes and
when I said that I did not feel
I already answered comfortable for you know
if you want to not know what to do
I just wanted it to end wanted to leave
to my house I was ashamed to react
more firmly he is not doing
nothing wrong is not only at the party
and he was there in his apartment stop
resist
it was the way it ended more
Quick
I later learned that he had
told friends that the frigid and
bad in bed
perhaps this story is you
family may have gone through something
similar in more than one occasion
this time it is true maybe
You not said no firmly with you
would have liked but at the same time
Heat was not well and knows also that
the other person must have known
without the need for more protest
strong but did not know why and
do not protest is stronger
the truth is that women do not
We react as expected
We react for a thousand and one reasons because
someone we trust and we
We repeat again and again that it would be
capable of making us what we do not
our boss wanted our
Professor Ali more powerful than us
a man who admired because
since childhood has taught us that
our value is measured by how they see us
men and because frankly there
nothing worse than a boring girl
prude because we are afraid to
reprisals because we know that a man
It can quickly become annoying
in a violent man and that is why we
I learned to smile and shut up because
we are afraid because we have learned to
survive because we do not know what else
What do we do with these cases
First and most importantly , talk
about them
sometimes even ourselves
we know because we have reacted the
way we
driven and therefore we feel
culprits responsible and shamed
but what all these stories
show that there is a component
structurally violent in the way
we have built relationships
between men and women
We have fathered we have created and
Standard absurd and harmful roles
engendering forms of violence
the idea that women always
we have to become more difficult and
that which follows is achieved and
why many times when a
woman says she does not feel really
Inconvenient men think she
is only playing the role that
it expects the problem or reality
is that the only way to understand this
It is talking about otherwise
many do not even have the
possibility of knowing that something they
considered normal interaction
it was actually an act of violence
few days after the march
He conversed with a dear friend
what it had felt to see
testimonials page
We talked for a while and then told me
something I’ll never forget to
I would never force a woman to
something that no longer wanted or at least
That’s what I thought because after
read these testimonials I can not help
ask me if I’m not the man
for a woman but I was the one
responsible for meeting another
person remembers that way
the truth is that there are many types of
violence or some types of violence
we are not going to remove but others
that we can change something so
simple as the power of words and
empathy
do not misunderstand me with this I do not want
say that laws and police stations
the emergency protocols
care are not necessary because they are
very important and urgently
necessary but most
cases they only solve it
It happens after assault
the only way to change the structure
which allows much of this violence
possible first is breaking
silence and by normalizing these
talks but we need
first learn
we need to create safe environments
women can speak without feeling
judged or attacked and need
having difficult conversations and
uncomfortable that frankly should have
It had long ago not deserve
much more than what we have today and
We have an obligation to this
problem does not extend indefinitely
towards the future
soon reach a new generation
one of so many who are here
They will bring the world care for and
will accompany grow and is essential
this happening in an environment in which
these conversations are normal
frequent and promoted for that
how to learn to relate
a more horizontal manner and empathetic
fury
the only way to accomplish that is
talking about this we have the power
change things and the best thing is that
We can start doing today
same
I am absolutely convinced that
we have the tool to do and
it is as simple as starting
to speak
the table is served so I spoke
month
[Applause]
[Music]
when I was six
a man tried to sexually abuse
my
a worker who was working on a
Building my house asked me to
help him sanding a door and
I agreed happy stood behind me for
teach me how to do it and after
a while began to stick against my
body and rubbing against me when
I asked what he was doing
He undid his pants and began
touch me what you just heard
It was the beginning of one of the first
versions of this presentation was
It has been completely ruled out until
I went back and read part I
chilled her know what I give them a
track is not the part where you said
an adult man touched me against my
will when I was just a kid
but what I say
just before that they did not listen
I’ll say it once again when he was six
years
a man tried to sexually abuse
me are people what I said because I said
He tried and not simply abused
I Wear sexually years
writing about sexual violence and
genre but here I am alleged
Christ was a feminist reproducing
very limited ways of understanding
sexual assault against always
protested the issue is that I’m sure
I’m not the only one that happens
this
let’s do an experiment
you imagine when they hear the
words sexual assault
and take a second plot in a
image in his head has
I am sure that in this auditorium
one see my different answers but
I will encourage me to try a maybe
share many of you may
imagine a violation that goes something
less so
A woman screaming fights and wrestles
rabidly kicks against a man who
It is imposed violently on it
perhaps maybe subject hits
humans force behind his head
and I stopped to resist or
threatening with a knife that
avoid tea
If this is so
Maybe it’s because this is the image of
sexual assaults that we see
for example in films that are
terrible and definitely real but
what they would do if I told you that many of
stories of violence and aggression
sexual they not look anything like that
I just tell
if I told you that she said no but
he did not say so firmly and good
I think we all know what we have
Indeed life is that
women say no when really
we say yes or yes tell them
already said no but in the meantime
continues taking off her clothes lingerie
in these cases as forms of aggression
and sexual violence
The problem is that many of us
we have a misconception but not
deeply limited than is the
sexual violence and this happens for
simple reason is that we do not talk
sufficient grip thereon
our society has normalized
gender violence while it has
become taboo possibility
talk about it and when we talk
on it we do it in a way that
It is fully influenced by the cinema
television or the news and
result is that we consume violence
sexual as if it were one more way
entertainment rather than approach
she or empathy
This has three consequences each
worse than the other and feed
mutually in a vicious circle
first forcing women to
live their most painful moments in
silent as if they had to feel
ashamed of what they did
nor they asked second limit
deeply our understanding of
sexual violence and thirdly
prevents we can do something real and
effective to overcome this epidemic
because as we will change something neither
even know how to recognize a
and context in which women us
we have been forced to live our
stories of violence in silence
for centuries to break that silence does not
is only transformer level
staff but it is fundamental and
profoundly revolutionary
social and is precisely what level
what I want to talk today about
how one day a group of women
he decided to break the silence and what
we could accomplish if this event
Exceptional become a standard
perhaps many of you have heard
talk about one month
the march that took place 13
August this year but participated
They probably saw images
good news papers
hundreds of thousands of people
mainly women
We took to the streets of the city
capital and all regions of
country to make our voice heard
protest against a sexist society
and a state that in the best case
has been indifferent to us and the
accomplice worst aggressors as
official figures
the biggest march of our
story and if they were not there because
they’ll have to trust me word
It was overwhelming
complex and unforgettable touching
But today I’ll talk about another
thing currencies something not seen in
news because its power could not be
captured by a camera of a process
much quieter but not so
less powerful happened in the
weeks before the march when
We decided to convene a national march
of women
did what many of my generation
He does when he wants to get something later
we enter facebook at that time no
else we knew what was going to happen or
When mobilize and masters but decided
They create a group that invited our
friends to start organizing the
were beginning to ten or twelve hours
six hundred and one days after 2000
suddenly and did not pass many days
that happen to something that happened
we had never been able to imagine a
She left a message on the group
It would change everything went something
something I think is important to give a
step forward and coming out
This start was kidnapped
repeatedly raped and tortured ago
many years and until today he suffered stress
Posttraumatic for what happened to my
assailant was convicted of theft and
not aggravated rape case was not
taken into account
when we read that in the group was as
If the gates of a dam
They opened after centuries of having
been closed those words
screen were a cry of rebellion
against the silence that we have
tax and against the weight that we are
forced to shut that we are
when forced to carry silent
our stories his statement
generated a chain reaction
unstoppable one by one
first by scenes and then by
hundreds of women decided to leave the
closet and begin to tell their own
stories of violence
for that time and we were a group of
More than 60 thousand people
If I were asked to sum up in one
sentence what happened
I say it was an act of alchemy
that transformed the silence
solidarity and empathy for pain
first time we could speak and could
we hear stories that they had
kept secret for years or
decades suddenly ceased to be a
painful moment to live and relive
and privately and again they became
in testimony not only of violence
but of survival and resilience
The statistics of sexual violence
They ceased to be statistics and
They became flesh and blood women
women like me or they are
today sitting in this auditorium women
with stories imperfect women and
deeply human
who were lucky enough to live that
experience spent weeks in a
transformative kind of euphoria and
a single cathartic experience
lifetime
one by one through begin to heal
the power of words and
testimonials
we begin to discover our
stories in the stories of others
and be in the pain of those there
He wrote in our own stories
we begin to understand ourselves as part of
a network of stories much
wider and are as unique as
deeply interconnected by
the first time we knew that we were
alone who it was good at talking and other
women could and wanted to hear
when this woman decided to leave the
closet and break that silence made us
a gift reminded us that it is not fair
we are that we carry in
silence with local and weight not
It has made us as if we were
feel shame or guilt for what
we never ever ask ask
you imagine what saving a
secret for 20 years
I do if someone had told me ago
five years would one day be able to
stop you in front of a group of
strangers and tell the story of
sexual assault
Louis King of them for too
time I refused to share what I
He had happened to someone felt
shame as if I were responsible
what had happened to me as if I and
I just had the responsibility of
have gotten where apparently no
and he had gotten a grown man
touch my body but what girl
I discovered is that when we share
our stories begin a cycle
the nation that extends beyond
of us we have gone too
alone time without knowing that our
best allies are right
aside our
the first time I share
story of my sexual assault
publicly in an article
I received dozens of messages from women
they had never spoken to anyone
what had happened
some were women and I knew
life at school in my neighborhood
and even in my own family
each had a different story
but all said the same
I thought it was the only
So when we break the silence
we also say that we will not continue
we refuse accepting the
possibility of recognizing some in
other victims
yes but mostly as survivors
and if any of you are listening
this and think
not only their own experiences
I can tell you one thing to have the
absolute certainty that they are not alone
and its allies are much more
close to what you imagine
The second problem that this silence
It generates is deeply limiting
our understanding of what the
sexual violence
we have become accustomed to a narrative
only sexual assault and is
So we discard everything that is not
suits and that’s when
we begin to wonder why not
said no because not lost because no
He shouted why he did not report because they do not
It resisted what the diversity of
testimonials on page showed
however it is to pigeonhole
sexual assault on a single type of
experience or a single type of mold
It is impossible from the gory
even the most seemingly everyday
testimony in the group showed
to limit our understanding of
sexual assault than most
we imagine as a violation
It is not only absurd but also prevents
we can recognize the true
extent of the problem
we are all here agree that
a woman who was raped and dragged
on the floor by her partner is a
victim of violence
no one in their right mind would not be
I agree with that but what about
other stories about the
forms with the attacks that are
violent in a way that is not so
graphics or visible happens with
forms of violence that the law has
as defining or penalize for example
What about this story was my friend
I had never seen more than that
but it’s a little drunk and party
It was fun so we ended
kissing when I told him and me
I wanted to go
He told me we ordered one taxi together
I had my house we got to
car on the road but asked me to
We should go to your room to take
last drink
I told him I did not want but
He insisted and did not want to look like a
believed in his house began to kiss him
I said I did not like the way it was
my friend but did not stop when
turned face
He welcomed me with hands and continues
He started kissing me take off my clothes and
when I said that I did not feel
I already answered comfortable for you know
if you want to not know what to do
I just wanted it to end wanted to leave
to my house I was ashamed to react
more firmly he is not doing
nothing wrong is not only at the party
and he was there in his apartment stop
resist
it was the way it ended more
Quick
I later learned that he had
told friends that the frigid and
bad in bed
perhaps this story is you
family may have gone through something
similar in more than one occasion
this time it is true maybe
You not said no firmly with you
would have liked but at the same time
Heat was not well and knows also that
the other person must have known
without the need for more protest
strong but did not know why and
do not protest is stronger
the truth is that women do not
We react as expected
We react for a thousand and one reasons because
someone we trust and we
We repeat again and again that it would be
capable of making us what we do not
our boss wanted our
Professor Ali more powerful than us
a man who admired because
since childhood has taught us that
our value is measured by how they see us
men and because frankly there
nothing worse than a boring girl
prude because we are afraid to
reprisals because we know that a man
It can quickly become annoying
in a violent man and that is why we
I learned to smile and shut up because
we are afraid because we have learned to
survive because we do not know what else
What do we do with these cases
First and most importantly , talk
about them
sometimes even ourselves
we know because we have reacted the
way we
driven and therefore we feel
culprits responsible and shamed
but what all these stories
show that there is a component
structurally violent in the way
we have built relationships
between men and women
We have fathered we have created and
Standard absurd and harmful roles
engendering forms of violence
the idea that women always
we have to become more difficult and
that which follows is achieved and
why many times when a
woman says she does not feel really
Inconvenient men think she
is only playing the role that
it expects the problem or reality
is that the only way to understand this
It is talking about otherwise
many do not even have the
possibility of knowing that something they
considered normal interaction
it was actually an act of violence
few days after the march
He conversed with a dear friend
what it had felt to see
testimonials page
We talked for a while and then told me
something I’ll never forget to
I would never force a woman to
something that no longer wanted or at least
That’s what I thought because after
read these testimonials I can not help
ask me if I’m not the man
for a woman but I was the one
responsible for meeting another
person remembers that way
the truth is that there are many types of
violence or some types of violence
we are not going to remove but others
that we can change something so
simple as the power of words and
empathy
do not misunderstand me with this I do not want
say that laws and police stations
the emergency protocols
care are not necessary because they are
very important and urgently
necessary but most
cases they only solve it
It happens after assault
the only way to change the structure
which allows much of this violence
possible first is breaking
silence and by normalizing these
talks but we need
first learn
we need to create safe environments
women can speak without feeling
judged or attacked and need
having difficult conversations and
uncomfortable that frankly should have
It had long ago not deserve
much more than what we have today and
We have an obligation to this
problem does not extend indefinitely
towards the future
soon reach a new generation
one of so many who are here
They will bring the world care for and
will accompany grow and is essential
this happening in an environment in which
these conversations are normal
frequent and promoted for that
how to learn to relate
a more horizontal manner and empathetic
fury
the only way to accomplish that is
talking about this we have the power
change things and the best thing is that
We can start doing today
same
I am absolutely convinced that
we have the tool to do and
it is as simple as starting
to speak
the table is served so I spoke
month
[Applause]
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